~£~ ~JJI0J~2 ake your Money go further at Mickey's p,,,lliO[]JffiW = @Uo([J([J \YIYll][JJ1~ '"~;;'-""\;;;,;~Co < " STARTING AT 9:00 PM with DJ BRYAN HAMRIC ~{e .~C.1;rt' \ 1\ • ·~~TI~rn[]JffiW = ~]NoG~ill P~D~~~~ from the editor ... Buenos dlos, Gabbers! I thought I thought I was dying, but Ijust had the clap, It was Fiesta, and I had the clap! Those lines are actually lyrics from Fiesta in Rio,the classic song from Bette Midler's iconic Clams on the Half Shell Revue, for which she won a special Tony Award in 1974 for her contribution to Broadway. But,for me, they symbolize the fun and frivolity that Fiesta in San Antonia represented to a then barely-legal and newly-out man beginning that long and sometimes painful journey into manhood and man-worship. Picture it: The Alamo, April 1979. A nubile, yet hirsute, young thing in nylon Dolphin short- shorts and a tank top joins a bunch of his newly-acquired and too-too-gay friends for a little elbow-rubbing and crotCh-grabbing in front of the Menger Hotel. There's window- pane acid and lots of bagged vodka for spiking the fruit punches - there's even a little bit of nose candy, but I digress, Standing there, In the early Spring heat. the young thing quickly tires, and decides to go to the Menger Bar,where it's cool and at least he can cop a few feels. Later that night. he rejoins his friends at the San Antonio Country, where the smell of poppers fillsthe air, and the feel of men's hands on his firm, yet supple ass makes him feel desirable for the first time in his life. That young thing was me; and the men's hands belonged to the pitchers from the Hous- ton Astros. Whether or not it was really the pitchers from the Astros - hell, whether or not I was really nubile and hirsute - Iscompletely irrelevant to the story. The point is,Fiesta was the biggest. most colorful and gayest thing that I'd ever born witness to, and it set the tone for the gay man that I was to become. It's still that way today. Oh, you may not get groped in the Menger Bar,and God knows that windowpane acid isn't being popped in every mouth at the Alamo Plaza, but Fiesta is still the sploshlsst and most fun you can have during the month of April in the state of Texas in a standing position. Oh, it's been sanitized - it's now just like Broadway, a Disney- esque version of the original. ..an EPCOT-inspired view of the world and its inhabitants that merely evokes memories of the ribald revelry that permeated such events in the closing decades of the 20th Century. But. the clubs are still packed and the hotels still filled with hunky men and beautiful wom- en wearing just what they need to wear to affect a really good tan line - and you're still just as likely to run into that hottie that you met during your last trip to Dallas. In other sponsored by words, it's still a helluva lot of fun. ~:;.o..-•,•~ So book your flight. fill up your gas tank or hitch a ride, but get to San Antonio for a party Red Bull I \I~\~·/~· you're not soon to forget. Have fun and, most Importantly, be safe - ya just never know " /.,.~ when a burrito is gonna hitcha in the eye ... "'''.~<Is~''-::~''~ And that's the gab ... ~~~~at~ ~ IIQIORII \lIANol/L:7'~'/'-l~ fleshjac.!9 latest - L--~ ~8a~ Page 6 t].cQ,9~ .Ski;-~i~.S VOl. 006 - APRIL -WEEK 3 - 2008 7 From the Editor by Bob Dineen 10 Gab Grooves by Jimmy R.Smith 14 OMBlog by Giga Bytes 18 Gab & Groan by Sebastian Venable 22 BuzzFile by Robert Stahl 26 Ask Rocco by Rocco Caseliano 32 Fiesta Hunk Stefano 35 AIN Bloomin' Ball 38 Fashion File by Nicholas Chui 42 Scopes by Mario Mares ,.,• 44 Ernest & Otis Ask The Gophers ( 47 Young Chemistry by Ralf Elizalde 49 Gab Bag Out Across Texas 60 Gab Guide Friday April 18: A very special Happy Hour Brought to you by GLADD and Smirnoff! 6:00pm to 7:30 pm Sun. April 20: Mr/Miss Big Thickette 2008 The Annual Fundraiser for the Turtle Creek Chorale AIDS Fund Sun. April 27: Miss DIVA 2008 The crowning of Volleyball Royaltyl www.roundupsaloon.com 3912 Cedar Springs • Dallas, Texas 75219 Ph 214.522.9611 My contentment as a gay man - an ele- ment that was definitely missing for the first 40 years of my life - is something I'm very conscious of and feel important to impart to others, I was one of those self-hating homo- sexuals, but now that I have a fully integrated life, I feel like my work is much stronger," And as they say, all work and no play ...Mony may recognize Bob Mould as one of the two DJs and hosts behind the wildly successful Blowoff parties, The other is electronic mae- stro Richard Morel (who also tours in The Bob Edited by Jimmy R,Smith Mould Band), Bob Mould is here, he's queer TOP 10 and he'll talk OJ Jimmy Skinner about it SOBE Houston but he'd rather let you get to know him lyrics, I related to the album as a whole, so through "District Line," his highly personal, in- I'm guessing you will, too, Some songs were 1. Planet Soul timate and introspective album about the a bit more specific, like "Who Needs To "Set you Free 08" complexity of love and life at-or longing Dream?" So I asked Bob about the queer for-the hands of another, aspect of the album, 2. Madonna "4 minutes" Bob Mould, the genius behind seminal post- "The stories on the record are a hybrid of .•. punk outfit Husker Du as well as the guiding autobiographical and observational, typi- 3. Seal force behind 90's alternative-rock heavy- cally within the same song, 'Who Needs "The Right L' weight Sugar, will tour the U,Sstarting March To Dream' is indeed man-specific, with the 5th, The tour will feature both classic mate- 'chasing the one who's running away while 4.Cee rial from Mould's considerable body of work, being chased by the one you don't want' as well as new songs from his forthcoming line being a good entry point, Anti- debut, "District Line," Bob Mould District Line 'Stupid Now' is the making a As tight and unfettered as its fool of yourself for someone cover art, Bob's new album isa who isn't interested, (I am not satisfying return to form for his the best at picking apart my fans-which include everyone own lyrics, I usually respond from the Faa Fighter's Dave better to someone else's in- Grohl to Daft Punk's Thomas rerpretotlon.) Bangaltar-as well as a great introduction for the unfamiliar , /' A few things that I think are to one of alternative rock's ' '/'//~ff~/ important: The universal na- most important musicians, /0LL.L..<. /"~ ture of relationships, Gay - / 'l"/: ~ relationships are different in As the gay publicist for a gay some specific ways, but the artist who's not always been "out," I listened universal nature of relationships, love, long- closely to Bob Mould's "District Line" album ing, joy, disappointment, are generally the to try to hear the "queer" in it, Whc:it I found same no matter what, I've always tried to ~as that regardless of the specificity of the highlight this, Page 10 Page 11 1.1 ha'le h eU-h wet om".2'J . tlfPlm.: oL,:_,,, I 3109 Knox Street. Ste 214 Dallas. Texas 75205 m and ~.~O dratt,'jtU www.gabweekly.com 214.559.3422 j • ,~.'~ it -'J' PUBLISHED BY m on Tues~aYl~ur$~ Gab Media Co. EDITOR-IN-CHIEF y. and Satu Bob Dineen [email protected] helps, On" fQr aU ~o 214.559.3525 MARKETING friors': we Entertainment Editor DFW Bureau Chief Wii ptay' on our huge 8")(8 Jimmy R.Smith [email protected] reeo. Urn" tel's ~~. thAM~1 201.362.7737 Iso th~ {feE} fi, 'Nt ha~ VIRTUAL MARKETING Wi.. DESIGN SPECIALIST John Carroll reat drag queens a~Q so"," 210.693.6628 [email protected] time~a dra,9~i'Ii'9Of' two;, ft. pool HOUSTON BUREAU CHIEF Alex Cuevas tournament (that'~ S~~ at [email protected] 713.686.5758 pm) al'\d Off-Key ~raoke SAN ANTONIO BUREAU CHIEF 'a~s.oSunday a(t Spm). WJ~did Wi~ Mario Mares 210.241.5633 f\ a,w~ndfrom the Oana~Obse"'"'1 [email protected] er (best gayborhood bar). AUSTIN BUREAU CHIEF Skip Bromfeld I,id put some e~e,eand~ inthis" 210.693.6628 (sony: about (l:Q\leriog .t u [email protected] al~thts te~t). Anyway! CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Robert Stahl s. We don't bit Mera Tucker Rocco Castellano have a fusNlt PRODUCTION ASSOCIATE Patrick McReynolds DISTRIBUTION Deborah Altamirano - Houston Julia Starks - Austin "' Gab Media Ca. All RightsReserved II original articles. artwork and photography In Gab Weekly i he property of Gab Media Co. and cannot be reproduced with ut prior written consent. The views expressed in editorial conten a not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher or the stoffl ublication of the name or image of any person or organization i ot an indication or reflection upon that person's sexual orienta ion or the views of the organization.