I was okay. Things will stay okay. times I hardly knew who or where I was. around me, everything that directly or in­ And in the end I took this, the fact that I directly tries to affect me; some small space I left Cambridge but I came back, and will always carry things with me, to mean to scratch out and keep free. And somehow in between I learned about all the things that even though I’ll never have a pure self I found that to be enough. I carried with me while I was gone—my free of influence and circumstance, even past experiences, my pattern of thoughts, though I’ll never isolate some essential me, Berta Greenwald Ledecky Undergraduate Fellow everything that has influenced me indi­ there’s something I can hold onto in the Katherine Xue ’13 thinks it’s time to climb another rectly and unconsciously—so that some­ face of everything, everything happening mountain. At Camp, a Community by isabel w. ruane ’14

The 2011 Onaway counselors at the top of Mount Cardigan (the author is fourth from left); campers outside one s our car sped away from Lo­ real world—and, more pressingly, with my of the two-person cabins they call home gan Airport, into Boston and memory of freshman year at Harvard. out along the Charles, my eyes though camp requires you to change your­ widened as the cupolas of Har­ I’ve spent nearly every summer of the self to fit its mold, that change is, first, Avard came into view. “Do I really go there?” past 10 years at Camp Onaway. From a more about character than looks, and, I mused aloud. At that moment, I couldn’t gawky, quiet 10-year-old to a grown-up, second, inevitably positive. The Onaway have felt farther away from being a Har­ goofy first-year counselor, Onaway has girls arrive in June looking like standard vard student: an independent college kid been my haven. Camp is fun, silly, care­ twenty-first-century kids—individuals, living in a city, studying and sailing, hang­ free; active, outdoorsy, and nature-loving; of course, but all bearing the same ob­ ing out with other kids but operating on above all, traditional. Think The Parent jects of modern America. Once arrived, my own terms, only as connected to others Trap, but more Hayley Mills than Lindsay though, we relinquish cell phones, tuck as I chose to be. I was in a different mode Lohan. Each summer, 120 campers and away street clothes, say goodbye to the altogether. counselors, aged 10 to 25, join our motherly Internet, and, most importantly, leave be­ That day, my mum and I were just pass­ director, Mrs. Conolly, for seven weeks of hind the petty competitions over looks, ing through Boston, dropping off one of swimming, sailing, hiking, and simple liv­ possessions, and status that plague our my fellow camp counselors at the airport ing up in the woods. Uniform checked or real-world lives. In the resulting void we before heading home for the final week of striped shirts are tucked in at all times, plant friendship, community, and frank summer. Soon I would be returning to Har­ cabins are inspected daily, songs are sung discussion of honor, values, and character. vard for fall semester, but for now, I could at every opportunity, and we gather for a Rejecting the trappings of modern life, at reflect from afar. Venturing away from the nondenominational chapel service in our least for the summer, allows us to embrace quiet lakes region of New Hampshire for lakeside, birch-lined grove every Sunday a different ethos. And though this camp the first time in two months, everything evening. To most, we Onaway girls sound culture shows itself in awkward uniforms, ordinary struck me as foreign: highways, crazy! But that wouldn’t be giving camp a ridiculous songs, and seemingly rigid rules, billboards, tall buildings, masses of people. chance. these traditions no more embody camp But these outward differences seemed triv­ Our common camp refrain is: “You can’t than red-brick edifices and leather book ial as I began contrasting the atmosphere get Onaway unless you spend a summer bindings embody Harvard. The traditions of my small summer camp with that of the there.” It’s hard to understand that even bring Onaway campers onto one plane so

Photographs courtesy of Isabel W. Ruane Harvard Magazine 63 John Harvard's Journal

Ruane (top right) in her the thing is—without this sort of discus­ camper days; a mural designed by 2011 campers sion, a community forgets simple rules of to celebrate Onaway’s behavior. When no one talks about re­ centennial summer by high- sponsibility, people leave trash in the hall lighting its many traditions for maintenance staff to deal with. When was excited to be returning no one talks about consideration, people soon to Cambridge—to my push through doors without looking to friends, my classes, my sail­ see if anyone’s following. When no one ing team, and to life in the talks about generosity, people forget city—but I was more con­ that it is more important to help a friend scious of my sadness in leav­ than to finish a problem set. I’m not ex­ ing my summer community. cusing myself from this sort of behavior At camp, I’m now one of the grown- (no one’s perfect—certainly not I), but ups: the girls look up to “Miss Is” to guide I know these breaches of consideration them. At school, I’m still a kid: professors happen here, and I feel certain that, were and advisers give assignments and direc­ values talked about, we would all behave tions to me as their student. At camp, I’m better. expected to help out, to work with others, Apparently, others at Harvard have been to make sure life runs smoothly for every­ thinking along the same lines. I returned one around me. At school, I’m expected to to campus in September to news of a new strive and achieve independently, to pri­ Freshman Pledge, which all the members oritize my success in some abstract quest of the class of 2015 were asked to sign. The to serve the world in the future. At camp, I pledge reminds students that, at gradua­ show my worth through kind words, good tion, they will be expected to be ready to advice, and uncomplaining aid. At school, I “advance knowledge, to promote under­ that we can develop the intangible quali­ show my worth through well-tuned writ­ standing, and to serve society.” It further ties of a strong community. ing, well-reasoned exams, and thought­ asks that students agree to “act with integ­ Camp is community; community is ful contributions to discussions. In short, rity, respect, and industry, and to sustain camp. Onaway takes girls from differ­ both Harvard and Onaway have high ex­ a community characterized by inclusive­ ent backgrounds, with different atti­ pectations, but their focuses are different. ness and civility” throughout their years tudes, and assimilates them into a family at Harvard. Surprisingly—at least to me— in which trust, honor, and care for others So why, I asked myself, did returning to this initiative drew quite a bit of ire, par­ are paramount. Though it may take years college make me feel as though I was re­ ticularly from members of the community to understand the power of this type of gressing? It just didn’t seem right that who saw the public nature of the pledge community, once it clicks, you never for­ I would soon be more focused on earn­ (the signed pledges were to be posted in get it: you are never content to sit back, ing myself a good grade than on ensuring freshmen entryways) as infringing on stu­ to do less than you can, to lie or cheat or that my campers behaved kindly to each dents’ freedom. (For more coverage, see shirk. And we love camp for this: in our other. It seemed wrong that tutors might harvardmag.com/convocation-2015.) But diverse, doctrine-shy world, one hardly be scolding me for making too much noise arguments about freedom and the idea of ever encounters a community in which or leaving inconsiderate messes, instead of a public display aside, it seems an over­ everyone agrees, implicitly, about the right my being responsible for teaching campers whelmingly positive move to re-open the way to behave. Nowhere else I know has to respect rest hour and keep their cabins discussion of values at Harvard. values that are so clearly defined, nowhere neat. All summer, camp reminded me to be I’ve come back from camp to college be­ is there such agreement about the proper considerate, kind, and generous, and I, in lieving firmly in the power of a community manner of treating other people. At camp turn, reminded my campers to do so. Now that embraces virtue even as its members we learn to sail, swim and knit, to build a I was returning to a place where these ide­ have fun and work toward common and in­ birdhouse and paddle a canoe, but all the als were never talked about. Finally, I real­ dividual goals. I hope the instigation of the while we are learning how to be, and that’s ized why my most recent drive through Freshman Pledge encourages more voices what’s most important. Cambridge felt so melancholy… to speak out about the importance of col­ Returning from camp is always a shock. Never in my first two semesters at laboration, respect, kindness, and humility Though we are eager to reacquaint our­ Harvard had I ever heard someone talk­ here. If they do, we will find the Harvard selves with electronics, indoor plumbing, ing about values. Maybe individuals were community rallying around these values. and boys, we regain these missing pieces of thinking about right and wrong, honor Imagine if, instead of seeing ourselves as normal life at at deep cost. We may have and duty, but they never brought those the smartest kids of America, we humbled the modern world back, but we’ve left be­ ideas up. I never sensed that the mem­ ourselves as the luckiest; imagine if, instead hind our Onaway community. I sensed this bers of Harvard’s community shared a of dreaming of personal success, we ea­ trade-off most acutely as I passed Harvard common idea about how to behave kind­ gerly anticipated using our talents to serve only hours after leaving New Hampshire. I ly and courteously to one another. And the world; imagine if we went around

64 November - December 2011 saying, “How can I help you?” and “What versal? If we talk about how we want to this standard is the norm. I know it. I’ve needs to be done around here?” instead of behave, sooner or later, the community watched my Onaway girls figure it out, and “These are my personal goals,” and “This is will embody that behavior. We should I think my Harvard classmates can, too. what I have to do.” make the common image of a Harvard stu­ Our school is full of kind, generous, un­ dent not a smart, entitled self-promoter Berta Greenwald Ledecky Undergraduate Fellow selfish individuals. But what if we could but rather a generous, humble leader. We Isabel Ruane ’14 loves Harvard almost as much as make the spirit of these individuals uni­ are capable of creating community where she loves camp.

Sports 269 yards. He was intercepted three times, twice in the final quarter. Brown came within a yard of tying the game as the fourth period opened, but Hanging Tough freshman defensive end Zach Hodges knocked the ball loose on a handoff to Bear back Mark Kachmer, and linebacker Alex A night of self-discovery at the Stadium Norman ’13 recovered. Linebacker Josh Boyd ’13 led the defense with 11 tackles and a forced fumble, while ike Harvard Stadium’s Field­ Chapple was best against Brown when fellow linebacker and captain Alex Gede­ Turf surface, this year’s football the weather was worst. Midway through on ’12 had eight tackles. team seems weatherproof. Un­ the final quarter, with rain falling in A week earlier, in the team’s season- fazed by a rainstorm that intensi­ sheets, he uncorked a 56-yard scoring pass opening game at Worcester’s Fitton Field, Lfied as the game progressed, the gridders to receiver Adam Chrissis ’12, giving Har­ defensive letdowns had allowed Holy Cross gave Brown a 24-7 dunking in the teams’ vard a commanding 21-7 lead. to score 27 consecutive points after fall­ Ivy League opener, a Friday-night game Chapple had set up the Crimson’s first ing behind, 14-3, at the start of the second at the Stadium on September 23. Coach touchdown in the opening quarter, taking quarter. But it was an offensive letdown Tim Murphy, whose squads have defeated the snap on a fake field goal attempt at the that short-circuited a Crimson comeback Brown in 10 of the last 12 encounters, saw Brown 6-yard line and running for a first in what ended as a 30-22 loss. Early in the this one as a moment of self-discovery. “I down at the one. Scales scored on the next final quarter, with Holy Cross leading 23- think tonight we developed an identity,” play. On Harvard’s following series, a 25- 14, Harvard drove to the hosts’ 9-yard line, he said after the game. “We’re a tough, yard run by Scales put the team in Bruin where Winters attempted a goal-line pass physical team.” territory once again; Chapple then lofted to the team’s ranking receiver, Chris Lor­ Tough, physical, and resourceful. With a 20-yard pass to tight end Cameron Brate ditch ’11 (’12). Cornerback Andrew Zitnik, quarterback Collier Winters ’10 (’12) ’14, who made a spectacular one-handed the Crusaders’ rangiest defender, snared the nursing a pulled hamstring, junior Colton catch and toppled into the Chapple got the start against Brown. He end zone. directed the offense with authority and Harvard’s 14-0 lead was passed adroitly, completing 15 of 26 throws imperiled when Brown ad­ for a career-high 207 yards and two touch­ vanced to the Harvard 9-yard downs. Tailback Treavor Scales ’13 ran line later in the period, but with bruising power, scoring the game’s safety Dan Minamide ’12 end­ first touchdown and finishing with 129 ed the threat with an inter­ yards rushing. Despite the rain, the offen­ ception. The Bears’ only score sive unit and kicking teams finished the came in the third quarter, on game without fumbling. On the other side a 30-yard pass from Newhall- of the ball, the defensive unit was implaca­ Caballero to flanker Tellef ble, forcing five turnovers and hammering Lundevall. Newhall, who the Bears’ former all-Ivy quarterback, Kyle missed most of last season Newhall-Caballero. with a broken wrist, threw 52 As a third-stringer a year ago, Chapple passes and completed 28 for appeared in nine games and started three of them, but completed only 47 percent Backup quarterback Colton of his passes. It’s now evident that he has Chapple ably directed the mastered Harvard’s complex offense, posi­ Crimson offense in a 24-7 victory over Brown, complet- tioning him as the heir apparent to Win­ ing 15 passes for 207 yards ters, a fifth-year senior who is scheduled and two touchdowns in a to graduate in January. rainstorm.

Photograph courtesy of the Harvard Athletics Office Harvard Magazine 65