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D A Christmas Prayer: Welcoming the Word that Became Flesh

BY ANDREW COMISKEY “No amount of faithful ‘Jesus, friend of a lonely heart, you are my haven and my gatherings, family, peace in times of struggle and doubt. You are everything to a lonely soul.’ or friends can be St. Faustina for us what Jesus Although the holidays are usually time of the end, the time when in quiet, I can become a holiday associated with excess, it may be everyone is obsessed with a lack monster: engorged and grouchy. alone can be… precisely in the ‘too much’ of our of time and space, short-circuited So I unplug and listen in the we discern the overload traditions that God invites us to by new technological furies… spirit of Samuel: ‘Speak, Your experience most acutely our ache News becomes a new noise in the servant is listening’ (1 Sam 3:10). and pull away to for prayer, for Jesus. Perhaps we mind, briefly replacing the news I quiet myself and wait on the be with the One who can say that our deepest cry at that went before it, only to yield One who is there. I wait for Christmas is satisfied only in to the noise that comes after it, His whispers. matters most.” quiet: ‘How silently, how silently, so that everything blends into the I start by gazing on the manger the wondrous gift is given!’ No same monotonous roar. News? scene before me then raising my amount of faithful gatherings, There is so much news that there eyes to the cross. That reminds family, or friends can be for us is no more room for the ‘good me of the war that was declared what Jesus alone can be. news.’ As the end approaches, at Christmas and won at Calvary. there is no room for solitude, for We turn to Him as the answer to It reminds me that the war still attentiveness to our own state the deepest cries of our hearts. being waged for souls can be or that of another. There is no We become aware of the en - fought only through prayerful room for God.” croachment of too many things attentiveness on the God who —we discern the overload and Please, don’t get me wrong. I love became flesh and offered His pull away to be with the One holiday clutter: movies, parties, flesh in exchange for us. Holy who matters most. opportunities to serve in a spirit prayerful days prepare us for a of good cheer. But I know that new year. Prayer fulfills Jesus’ Thomas Merton says it best: “We unless I withdraw to seek Him live in the time of no room, the continued on page 2 www . desertstream . org 816.767.1730 Thirt y- five Years of Healing, Equipping and Proclaiming 1 PERSPECTIVE

Christmas Prayer... strong, the One to whom we can rest in Him; beyond all our continued from page 1 entrust uncertainties that might grasping is the holy work of otherwise sink us. our Creator. Rest shines forth words: ‘Apart from Me, you can as more productive than all I hold in vivid memory several “I know do nothing’ (John 15:4). our work.’ Christmases past which nearly that unless Abiding in Jesus truly gives anchored me to some bitter ‘Work’ involves all our own efforts grace but also can expose gaps disappointments. Trained in to solve our problems, to gain I withdraw in our lives. We may exit Christ - prayer, I realized that I had control over our uncertainties. mas feeling cornered by the a place to go! Real prayer, on the other hand, challenges that await us in the exposes our cares, fears, and con - to seek Him Trust turned the tide of fear New Year. Take heart! We can trolling efforts; once we release and gave me rest. in quiet, start 2016 by entering into enter those to Jesus, we can then rest into the spacious place of prayer He gave us that place of rest in the Love that is there for us. I can become a promised to us in Psalm 31:8— through His crib and Cross, ‘that After all, ‘What do we have that ‘You have not handed me over to gate by which God unceasingly we did not first receive?’ (1 Cor holiday monster the enemy but have set my feet enters our lives.’ (St. John Paul 4:7) More than expecting a con - in a spacious place.’ Through ll) We surrender to Jesus what - crete answer to our concerns, we I quiet myself turning quietly towards Him, ever arises in silence to Calvary; entrust the concern to Him and He invites us to return to the we lay down the whole of our can know that answers will come and wait on Source, the freshest, sweetest lives before the One who has as we abide with Him and go water there is. We wade in that done all to grant us a place of forth from the place of quiet. water and wait for the awareness rest (Hebrews 4: 11). Merton the One who If we fall asleep, don’t worry: that He is purely good and again: ‘God works in us as we ‘Little children are as pleasing is there. to their parents when they sleep as when they are awake’ I wait for (St. Therese de Lisieux). Rouse yourselves to listen and know His whispers.” that He will speak to you in ways that you can receive; ‘I know my sheep; my sheep know Me. My sheep hear my voice’ (John 10: 14-27). Meditate on choice bits of Scripture, savor His words like sips of fine wine. He loves us in quiet as He tends to our deepest needs. Contemplative prayer helps us to be a good gift to others. That matters during the holidays when we have more occasions

Ps. 38:9

All my longings lie open before you, Lord; “Prayer my sighing is not hidden from you. is the means by which we can repair all that is broken”

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than usual to offer our gift. Consider: “Meditate 1. One of the first things that on choice arise in your brief times of quiet is the realization of sin. It may be the shame of your bits of sin—did we say too much or too little? Did someone pro - Scripture, voke desires of disdain, envy, lust, or bitterness? Offer these savor His quickly to God for purifica - tion. Perhaps we recall the words like sting of another’s sin. Release him or her to Jesus so we can sips of get on with the business of being a gift. The enemy will fine wine use holiday-‘inspired’ memo - ries to shut us down. In His He loves us in Presence, ‘All our desires lie open before You, O God’ quiet as He (Psalm 38:9). Instead of in - trospecting, act decisively at tends to our the Cross so that desires for another’s good might prevail deepest needs.” over childish patterns. 2. I realize that some conflicts, especially related to family, are huge and cannot be resolved in one prayerful surrender. It is a matter of 3. As we wait before Jesus, He is even if I have not received many surrenders in which we sensitizing us to the needs of such a gift in quiet, it may allow the wound to be washed others. Quieting our souls and come as I go to my friend or by His blood and water over unloading our hearts are a gift family member. In response and over again. In the same to others; we are preparing to my prayer, the word springs prayer, we offer up the offend - ourselves for them. I love up like a small fountain and Isaiah’s words when he says: waters the weary one. Spring ing party again and forgive Heb. 4:11 him or her yet again, as many ‘The Lord has given me an in - up, o well! structed tongue, to know the times as it takes until you are 5. Sometimes, our quiet moments Let us, therefore, word that sustains the weary. no longer under his or her are designed just to create He awakens me morning by make every effort domination. Such healing is space in our hearts for persons morning, awakens my ears to a function of quiet surrender who we know require more to enter that rest, listen like one being taught’ to the Crucified. “Prayer is grace for us. We ask God to (Isa 50:4). the means by which we can expand our hearts, to grant us so that no one will repair all that is broken,” 4. In quiet, we can listen for a share in His generous spirit perish by following says St. Teresa of Avila. the healing word on behalf for that one who provokes an of another. What a great gift ugly stinginess in us. Instead, their example of to offer such an encouraging may we manifest Jesus. disobedience. word on Christmas! I find that Bless you this Christmas. Through prayer, may we welcome Jesus and extend generously the gift PurificatioHe han s made us for others.

Thirt y- five Years of Healing, Equipping and Proclaiming 3 PERSPECTIVE How The Word has Become “Flesh” for Us “The birth BY ANN ARMSTRONG of the “From the fullness of his grace we all have received one blessing after baby Jesus another….grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.” John 1:16, 17 Our team was meeting to pray and ministry. I waited some of His grace and truth to bring stands as for one another and make plans more, not wanting to share pri - peace and rest to my friend. for our Living Waters group. We marily from what had blessed He listened and received these set up several stations around and spoken to me. the most words and the prayer. Those the church and began to listen God continued to impress upon of us praying saw God’s peace for what God had for each one. significant me the fullness of His grace come as the leader was re - I looked around the room at and provision, spoken of by St. minded again of His presence. event in all those receiving prayer. Two John. I believed this was a word He shared how the verse and male team members were pray - of hope and truth from Him for prayer helped him to trust God history, ing for the coordinator. As I this leader. Since the Lord had to bring His best, according watched and waited, I sensed been blessing me with the same to His timing. God bringing to mind this verse verse, I said something like, ‘I because it has Ann is the director of interces - for him (see above) one that I know this is something God has sion for Desert Stream Ministries meant the had been meditating on. I knew been speaking to me.‘ I shared he was facing several challeng - what I sensed from the Lord, pouring into a ing circumstances in his life asking for the daily measure sick world the healing medicine BY BECKY TURNER

of love which Last spring I was on the team for the Leadership Training; during that week, has transformed there are many opportunities to listening in prayer for oneself and for all manner of others. As I was preparing for our time together, I enjoyed being in the presence of Our Lord—listening and asking Him to bless the training through His dwelling with the team and hearts for the participants. We hope and pray that each person meets Jesus very personally. almost two As I was praying, I felt like and the Lord met many folks to my Creator. I was praying thousand years.” there was a block to my heart. in profound ways. “Thy will be done” but I was I was not sure why but I gave not living it. The block cracked. My most powerful experience George Matthew Adams the Lord permission to show me When it did, grace and mercy came after the forgiveness and asked that we would grow poured in. I felt His loving arms teaching. I was praying about closer through the training. around me. I am grateful to the who I needed to forgive. To my We gathered as leaders the Lord for speaking to me and for surprise, I heard His still small day before for fellowship and continuing to woo me as His voice say: ‘What about Me?’ prayer. One of the prayer war - most precious daughter. Slowly, I realized that I had riors had a picture for me of a been harboring unforgiveness Becky is the volunteer coordina - boulder that was not allowing toward the Lord. I was horrified. tor for Desert Stream Ministries. God to go deeper. I asked the My pride in telling the Lord what She has a heart for ministering Lord to show me what “it” was He should be doing in certain to family and friends of those but again I did not get a clear situations in my life was keeping with same-sex attractions. idea. The week was beautiful me from completely surrendering

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BY DANIEL DELGADO “The Son of I was ministering in Mexico City at a Living Waters Leaders Training. God became I received a picture for a participant in the small group. He was sitting in a man to a room strapped to a chair and it was as if the roof was going to cave in. It was the only room in the house that was on fire. I saw his family outside along with a big enable men fire truck trying to put the fire out. to become He confirmed the vision and was left in the house and the Daniel is an intern at Desert was visibly shaken. We walked family did not come to find him. Stream Ministries. His heart is sons of God.” into the house and up to the The man recalls finding his way particularly drawn to minister room and sat with him in the out of the house. He said that to Spanish speaking people. C.S. Lewis fear. I affirmed that we the his abandonment had become small group were with him and the big joke in his family. we invited the Lord to come This encounter shifted the way into his despair and loneliness. he viewed the heart of Our Heav - It was here that we were able enly Father. It was moving for to mediate the love of God so everyone in the group because this man would know that he we knew God was releasing life was loved and accepted. through this healing word. There was an earthquake in Mex - ico when he was a little boy. He

You have shaken the land and torn it open; mend its fractures, for it is quaking. Psalm 60:2

Rev. 4:8

“Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God Almighty, which was and is and is to come.”

Thirt y- five Years of Healing, Equipping and Proclaiming 5 PERSPECTIVE

“There is no BY DEAN GREER name so sweet Early on in my ministry training I was given an opportunity to serve on a on earth, prayer team at a Desert Stream conference. I had some entry-level experience on my church’s prayer team but hadn’t served for very long in Living Waters. There was still no name so much to learn and I was eager, if not doubtful. sweet in Ministry time came and I was After about 15 seconds of longer and when she was directed to a middle-aged silence I saw a picture. A bare comforted I asked: “What was heaven, woman who was standing hand reached down into the God telling you?” stoically, waiting for the Lord ground and started turning She said, “I came tonight after to meet her. My first thought the soil. That was it. the name, asking the Lord to help me deal was, “Isn’t there another mid - I noticed the woman was still with my sexual abuse. I have dle-aged woman on the team before His stoic, as she expressed no emo - never spoken of my abuse to who should pray with her”? tion other than discomfort. My anyone. I told God that I could wondrous birth, Of course there was not. discomfort became noticeable never tell anyone, unless He to Christ the I stood with her, placed my as well. I asked her if God was convinced me of an open door.’ hand delicately on her shoulder showing her anything and she She went on to say, “I was Savior given.” and said to myself, “Come, Holy shook her head. abused by my grandfather in Spirit, come!” She opened her the garden behind his house. I had nothing else to offer, so George W. Bethune eyes to see who was praying for Ever since, any garden-like area said, “I saw a picture of a hand her and I interpreted disappoint - provoked immense fear in me. reaching down into the ground ment in her glance. Immediately With that picture, God told me and turning the soil—does that the accuser began dissolving any that he was re-tilling the soil mean anything to you?” She crumb of confidence I had. It in order to purify and redeem immediately said, “No”. didn’t help that the invitation to the garden He created me for. come forward was vague, a call We stood there together for He wants to meet with me in to ‘receive whatever the Lord a few more minutes and tears His garden.” might have for you!’ This gave began to lightly roll down her Dean is the Living Waters US me no direction as to how to cheeks, which lead to immense Coordinator. pray so I was left with nothing sobbing and her sitting on the but, “Come, Holy Spirit, come!” ground. I sat with her a bit

John 1:14

“The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.”

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BY MAIT E´ RODRIGUEZ “He was

Last November during our training I was going through a difficult season. I created of a could feel a division in my heart between two “goods”: a call to free sexual and mother whom relational captives and my heart’s desire for a contemplative life in a religious community. He Created. As I was meditating, the Lord to me and brought peace in the I see pictures for participants gave me a picture that surprised midst of my inner turmoil. in our groups but usually I He was carried me and brought balm to my don’t see pictures for myself. As I continue to meditate on heart. I saw an infected and This memory of listening prayer this picture, the Lord continues by the hands deep wound in me and how salt helps me when the toils and to reveal more of its meaning. had been put in the wound, disappointments in life come: He showed me the reality that I that he formed. which made it hurt more. God it reminds me to keep my was going to continue to live in showed me that I had to keep wound clean and to depend tension. You may think this pic - the wound clean with the help on Him—the Truth, the Light, He cried ture is not hopeful or enlighten - of my Church and the Living and the Life. ing but for me it was just what Waters community. He also said in the I needed! I had been raising my Maite is the coordinator of that it was not going to heal fist at God, wanting my will and Aguas Vivas, the arm of Desert completely: that it would remain not seeing His will. In my pain, Stream for Spanish speakers. manger an ‘open wound’. As difficult as He wanted me to lean on Him. the picture was, it was soothing in wordless infancy. He, the BY CINDY DEL HIERRO Word, without

At just the right time God comes, and often in ways I wouldn’t consider! whom all human I awoke one morning in the Philippines on our last day of the leadership eloquence training; I spent time praying just before dawn. While in the dark I enjoyed my is mute.” time with the Lord and I thanked him for his goodness toward us all. St. Augustine Tiptoeing into the bathroom, I stared up at her beautiful, Cindy is a Desert Stream Ministries I turned the light on to look wrinkled, olive skin, I yearned to and, along with her husband in the mirror and…Holy cow! be just like her. I wanted to have Jude, direct Confluence Ministries A cavernous crease curved her wrinkles! I loved her simplic - in Denver. across my face! I had slept on ity and purity. I remember often my travel pillow that has piping trying to fold and crinkle my skin around the edges, which left to be creased like hers. With that the beautiful dent. I laughed memory, I realized instantly that out loud and said, “Well now, I did want the good gift of the isn’t this pretty?!” true feminine. That desire came from knowing her. Although we Still in the glow of my time with Lk. 2:15 never shared a deep connection, the Lord, I wandered out onto she embodied the genuine dig - the terrace and took in the “Let us go over to Bethle - nity of womanhood. glorious sunrise. Without any hem and see this thing warning, tears began falling That providential wrinkle in time from my eyes. ‘What! Why am I unveiled the truth that I have that has happened, crying?’ I felt no clear emotion, always esteemed the incompara - only tears. Curious, I asked the ble presence of authentic which the Lord has made Lord what was happening and woman. That is a treasure I’ve known to us.” instantly I had a memory from longed to pass on to my loved my childhood. ones. Jesus spoke to me that morning saying: “This is my gift I was sitting with my grand - to you from the Philippines.” mother in the rocking chair. As

Thirt y- five Years of Healing, Equipping and Proclaiming 7 BY BRIAN BARLOW Comfort 2015 It has been said that love and pain go together, for a time at least. To know YEAR-END REPORT love you must know pain. It was His story and such it is with our lives. Publisher/Editor This truth offered little comfort to me growing up in a small Midwest farm Andrew Comiskey community. One of four boys, I was the third of four boys borne to hardworking Art Direction Immanuel Communications and loving parents. Even though my folks cared deeply for their boys, they could not always Desert Stream Ministries protect us from life’s cruelties. publishes the following: Newsletter (Spring and Fall) I was sensitive, artistic and listened and the fragile box in else cry with me. This was Mid-Year Report (Summer) loved the outdoors; however, which I carefully packed these Holy Ground in my healing Year-End Report (Winter) I always seemed to be chal - memories broke. The tears came journey and a tremendous lenged when it came to relating gushing out in sobs. I was sur - gift from the Father. to my gender. I had some prised at what happened next. Mission Statement Brian is the Living Waters Coor - trauma early on in life that I One by one these men started dinator for Southern California. Based on the biblical foundations would later come to understand to cry with me, including the of compassion, integrity, and was sexual abuse. Coupled with leader. I had never grieved over dependence on God, relentless teasing from my old - the loss created by my abuse Desert Stream Ministries est brother, a solid masculine and sin let alone had anyone proclaims to the world the identity seemed to be out of transforming power of Jesus Christ. reach as I grew up. We equip the body of Christ to Fortunately, I met Jesus at a minister healing to the sexually young age. I came to rely on and relationally broken, through healing groups and leadership His mercy and grace in the training for the local church. years to come as my need for male affirmation became sexualized. His mercy brought Staff me to loving believers who Executive Director committed to walking with Andrew Comiskey me as He exposed the areas Desert Stream Press that needed His presence. Annette Comiskey One of the most impactful Living Waters USA Coordinator Dean Greer experiences was during a Living Waters Leadership Train - Director of Intercession Ann Armstrong ing several years ago. I was Aguas Vivas Coordinator with a group of men who under - Resources stood the intricate balance of Maite Rodriguez-Mora love and pain, and the grief Tech Support that results. The door to deep Eric Spady ‘living waters’ often comes Intern Staff through grieving. Daniel Delgado Support Staff In my small group, for the first Becky Turner time, I was asked straight away Lori Harry Nate to share about my childhood abuse. As I shared, these men No part of this Newsletter/Report may be reproduced or reprinted without permission.

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