Interview with Rumpelstiltskin Junior The true love story Copyright reserved. This current edition with all its parts is copyrighted and is only allowed to be recited in whole or partly with permission of the author. Copying, digitalization, color disassociation or similar is a copyright relevant replication. Infringements against the copyright protection as well as all editing of the here named creative elements are only permitted with expressly, previous approval of the publisher and the author. 1 The invitation I did not have any time to ponder why I had been so undaunted by death to go to see the heartthrob of my school right out in the sticks in the middle of the night. But as a typical Cinderella I was not brave enough to give Steven my invitation card for my fancy-dress party in broad daylight. The punishment of my nightly pass followed swiftly - quasi by racing feet. Something hairy with extremely yellow eyes and knife-sharp teeth was chasing after me across half of the continent. I knew that at the place of my ancestors were the most poisonous and dangerous animals but I had never seen this creature here in any biology book. And it scared the crap out of me! In my panic, I had completely lost my bearings. I did not even remember any more where at this god-forsaken spot with zero hiding places my favorite aunt had parked her car in order to wait for me. Due to her penchant for romantic, we headed out in a night of a full moon. Though I was an athletic ace, after a few hundred meters my lungs were shortly before bursting while my heart had to pound that quickly that I would have blasted any ECG. But the next tree root was supposed to be my salvation - at least physically since I sprawl. At first, I felt the deepest gratitude that I did not fall into a nest of bulldog ants because their poison was even able to kill an adult. And even though my blood consisted of chocolate, the venom was for sure able to eliminate me within a few minutes. I was just about to bob up when the creature caught me up and landed on my back like a heavy rock. »Phew!« was squeezed out of my lungs. My last hour had come, flashed through my mind when I felt its claws in my back. So, while I waited for its fangs to dig into my flesh during the last seconds of my life, the sweetest pictures of Steven sped past my mind’s eye. He was the grooviest boy of the whole universe with the most beautiful smile in the world. When Steven smiled, the ice melted at the South Pole. He had a dark tousle-head and the most extraordinary eyes I had ever seen. On some days, they were as blue as a glacier, and then they glowed as yellow as a buttercup. And he had muscles like a bear, although, he was fourteen years old - just like me. The only problem with my classmate was that he was even shier than me. To start a chat with him was approximately as easy as having a cup of tea with the Queen. And now I was supposed to die in the tender years of a teenager without the chance to kiss my dream boy? This thought aroused my spirit. I had to end this nightmare. Thus, I mobilized my last forces and unseated the offender. »Wait, Emma! I just want to talk to you,« his male voice croaked. I stumbled. Did that creature with its nasty snout use human language? And it knew my name? I scanned the critter which presumably looked a hundred times worse due to the darkness. Was that the preferred way of inviting someone to a cosy little chat with tea and chocolate? »Talking?« I said out of breath. 2 The thing in front of me heftily nodded and skidded its huge ears around like elastic planes. That was pretty much the last thing I perceived on this moon-gravid night under the open sky, then, I collapsed completely overextended. Made-up story Once upon a time… …there was a Miller’s daughter whose father showed off to the King about his daughter being able to spin gold out of straw… »That is how the fairy tale starts but it is totally made up. I certainly have to know this,« the humpbacked manikin in front of me said with his hoarse voice, snuffling. »I really feel awkward about that. I am absolutely jazzed, and then, I have always got a runny nose. I beg your pardon!« Since his icicles-schnoz was continually dripping, he took his shirt in order to furtively dab his damp nose. »My father landed on the earth countless years ago and thus, I exactly know what was going on here.« I fished a tissue out of my backpack and handed it to him. Runny noses drove me crazy - no matter if in humans or in…well, whatever sat in front of me. Finding that out, I intended to do since my opposite had asked me - like a huntsman - for an interview. He wanted to get rid of the prejudices about his father. He had promised to let me go as soon as I would have written everything down. Withal, my liberty was not that important to me at all. Much more encouraging was the fact, that he promised me a date with Steven - howsoever, he wanted to accomplish that! His extremely haired face lightened up when he got sight of the piece of cellulose. Gratitude blazed out of his yellow eyes and almost made him cute. »Most kind of you, Emma, thanks!« He blew his nose noisily. I eyed the ugly dwarf in front of me. From time to time, he stealthily picked his nose, sitting on an oversized armchair with his knobbly knees. »I wonder if you could postpone picking your nose?« I asked hesitantly. The mere thought of these green stick-on bowls pressed my dinner upwards my gullet. Surprised, the full-grown hop-o’-my-thumb raised the fur above his eyes which vaguely reminded of eyebrows. »Why? It fuels my trains of thought. And you want to know a lot, don’t you?« »Well, actually, you approached me because you were looking for someone to write down the story of your father correctly«, I replied. »That’s true! Alright, I stop that if it calms you. But I am allowed to knead my ears, ain’t I? Otherwise, I will get too tired.« »Of course.« His ears were just about the limit! They were at least thirty centimeters long and looked as if the creator turned them around the wrong way - either out of fun or because he took a cup too much. 3 The fur, you would rather suspect at the top, covered the bottom side and the thin skin swirled up above as if someone blew at it with a hair dryer. The longer head hair, which peeped out of his fur, was balding - whether this was because of his age I could only guess. I had never met a being who has claimed to be a few thousand years old. To be exact, I also never ran across someone who has impersonated himself as an alien, even though creatures from other galaxies had always attracted me magically. I was the same freak like my Mom. While other girls in my class rather dreamed of princesses I was keen on monstrous villains, the uglier the better. Withal, I did not look like I was bored by princesses - on the contrary. I myself had hair like a Haflinger horse, eyes like a blue butterfly and an absolute angelic face. I regularly drove my stern grandmother Ilse from Germany to insanity because I did not let me squash into a princess costume only because she wanted to have a souvenir photo. No, I preferred going to Fasching as a ›Wookie‹ - the most famous of this over and over furred bunch is ›Chewbacca‹ from the ›Star-Wars‹ Episodes. Children’s photos always showed me with a monster suit since I did not even need the carnival time for cladding. Fortunately, my Mom was as freaky as I, thus, I loved our fancy-dress parties above all. And exactly to such a costume party, I had planned to invite Steven. I had to booze Bach flowers extracts in order to give myself liquid courage. I had to ring the changes with my favorite aunt about all questions which could took me by surprise. And if my bodily ›super-nervosity-functions‹ had not miserably let me down, I would have been completely relaxed. But I was not! My aunt had parked the car three blocks away from the house of my heartthrob and I had marched in the direction of Armageddon shaky-legged. Super bravely, I had rung the doorbell at Steven’s house and had waited prancing on the porch. But before I could have handed the invitation card over to Steven I had been surprised by this weird something in front of me. Thus, I could have only let the card slip onto the doormat because afterwards, I had been chased through the nightly area. I only remembered these two reflector eyes and finally, I woke up in this strange cottage in the presence of this creature who claimed to be Rumpelstiltskin’s son. »Why did you actually ask me of all people? I mean, there are about seven billion humans.« »But you are the only fairy tale girl who loves villains.