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Thanksgiving at Our House

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Thanksgiving at Our House Newsletter of the Atlanta Area Chapters September - October 2001 "The mission of The Compassionate Friends is to assist families toward the positive resolution of grief following the death of a child of any age and to provide information to help others be supportive." VoiceLink Atlanta Area 770-491-8784 Atlanta Area Chapters Web Site "Risk" www.tcfatlanta.org (Quote from Leo Buscalia) Newsletter Editor, Jayne Newton "To laugh is to risk appearing the fool P.O. Box 656 To weep is to risk appearing sentimental Tucker, Georgia 30085 To reach out for another is to risk involvement 770-923-5356 To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self [email protected] T o place your ideas, your dreams before the crowd is to risk their loss Atlanta Area Chapters To love is to risk not being loved in return Atlanta (Tucker) 770-483-1267 To live is to risk dying Atlanta (Tucker) To hope is to risk despair Siblings Group 770-499-2461 To try is to risk failure Ben Hill 404-768-5440 But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk Conyers 770-483-1267 nothing. The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing and is nothing. They may avoid suffering and sorrow, but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, live. Gainesville 770-287-1239 Jonesboro 770-957-6610 Chained by their certitudes, they are a slave, they have forfeited their freedom. Lawrenceville 770-932-5862 Only a person who risks is free." Marietta 770-424-1548 Rome 706-235-6108 A friend just recently sent me this poem. It reminded me of Evan first, as this is how he lived his life. I want to thank my friend for Sandy Springs 770-410-9819 sending it to me as it has helped me live this poem at a time when I needed to feel "free" from the grief of the approaching anniversary. National TCF Headquarters Thank you for sharing this risk with me. P.O. Box 3696, Oakbrook, Il 60522 www.compassionatefriends.org ~Kim Keller (Evan's Mom), Lawrenceville, TCF Toll Free 1-877-969-0010 Linked Together - Atlanta Area Chapters September - October 2001 Page 1 of 25 Moving On Doesn't Mean You Forget how I am supposed to react. I just want to share your life & love. I have been touched by an angel. It's a simple & courageous fact. And still feel his touch today. Such a frail little body full of love, My precious little Angel in Heaven and a disease that took him away. just recently turned sixteen. Oh, I wish I could have held you ... Twelve year old little boys Those listening to me know what I mean. have other things to do. Not spend time in and out of hospitals ... You shall never be forgotten, my child. Oh, I couldn't take the pain from you. You just can never get that far. Moving on doesn't mean you forget ... So you closed your beautiful eyes, For I know exactly where you are! and drew your final breath. When you left us behind that winter day ... ~Author~ Kaye Des'Ormeaux We felt that burning sting of death. Copyright 2001 Kaye Des'Ormeaux Dedicated to Susan Kidd You've been in Heaven for over three years now. In Memory of her son Adam Kevin With the light of Jesus on your cheeks. Feb. 19, 1998 - June 16, 2001 He replaced your pain with strength & courage. And now, that strength is what I seek. Re-entering School after the I think of your glorious spirit. It was obvious to those you met. Death of a Sibling Oh I know I need to go on, my child, but that doesn't mean forget. Going back to school after the death of your brother or sister is a hard thing to go through. At first, there are Missing you and sharing your life three groups of people to deal with: people who give you is what has helped me survive. a lot of support, people who don't know what to say, and Oh I think of the many hearts you touched those who give you weird looks and stay away from you. every day that you were alive. This lasts for a little while. Oh, I think about what others would tell me. After a short time, changes with each group occur. That you were such a joy to be around. Those who didn't know what to say start to speak or That smile and laughter you were blessed with ... begin to talk. The group who kept away stops ignoring Let others see you on higher ground. you. The people who gave you a lot of support slowly return to their own affairs. After about a month and a I heard that you just took it all in. half, everything goes back to normal and is over to Never once did you complain. everyone except you. This is very difficult and It made no difference what test they makes you feel all the more alone. did .... You never once let them know your pain. After a long while the shock for you goes away and it is then when you need the support from Now, I want you to always be your friends, peers and teachers. This month is remembered. the first anniversary of the death of my brother. For your life gave purpose to mine. Most people will have forgotten and everything is I may move on with my life here on right with the world. But it is not! Certainly not earth, to my mother and me. but I'll never leave your memory behind. Jordan Ely It seems that some others don't know Linked Together - Atlanta Area Chapters September - October 2001 Page 2 of 25 Making Dreams Reality when a Piece is Missing “You need to move on and carry on with your life”. Those I’ve had with my husband and child. I envisioned him being a are the two phrases we as bereaved parents hear so loving husband and a great daddy. I had so many plans for often. That’s what everyone wants us to do as soon as what I would do with and how much I would love and enjoy my possible after our child has died. The active parents grandchildren. All those dreams died when James’ life ended want to see us getting back to the land of the living; they and life took a totally different direction. Those were our want to be able to see us normal again; they don’t know parental dreams and as a couple, we still had our personal how to deal with us when we are full of sorrow; when we dreams; ones we couldn’t think about when all we could have a bad day, no matter if it’s a year later or five years manage was making it through today, never mind tomorrow later. We are told again and again, it’s time to move on and certainly not years ahead. with your life, it’s more than enough time to carry on and get back to normal. We, as bereaved parents, know that This journey that has taken our future toward a totally new we do move on every single day and every moment without horizon is one that I take with great reluctance and deep our child. We don’t have a choice. Every day we get out sorrow. How do we, as bereaved parents, deal with “the of bed and make it through the day at work is a day that future” when the time comes to make a decision regarding we are moving on. Every holiday we survive with the the future? This was a tough lesson I learned this summer spiritual image of our child, in the midst of the physical when we realized our dream of owning a house on the beach. presence of everyone else’s whole family, we are carrying We never would have been purchasing this house this year if on. We do what we have to do just because we have to. James were alive. When we had the opportunity to realize We eat, live, even laugh once in a while, find ways to our dream we took the chance and made it reality. reinvest our lives in memory of our child and to most However, when it came to the actual closing date, July 5th, people, we look and act normal once again. However only just ten days before James’ birthday (which would have a bereaved parent, when connecting with another been his 18th) we didn’t know how to celebrate. It’s hard to bereaved parent, knows to what extent and how much be happy and excited about making a commitment for the courage it takes to breathe, survive and deal with life future when our child is not a part of that future. We own again when a part of us is gone forever. Yet, everyone this beach house now and although it’s a dream come true, else, the clueless others, tell us we need to move on. the part of enjoying it with our son, possibly his wife and maybe our grandchildren will never become reality. Instead We manage to do the things we absolutely have to do with we take what life gives us and make the most of it. We’ll go some semblance of normalcy. Yes, some of us go to work to the beach house, walk the shores of the Gulf of Mexico or volunteer or speak out on various causes that have a with James in our heart and bring his spiritual presence and connection with our child’s death, or some of us just memories with us there.
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