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Alt-Health: Pandora’s Paradise The legalization of cannabis is nearly upon us and it is a move that I both applaud and dread. If we lived in a perfect world, with people who respected the properties and consequences of inebriates and used them to enhance life rather than replace it, there would be no contest. However, we don’t — so let’s look at the facts. First, the plus side. I have no idea why every state has not already made medical marijuana legal. There is enough clinical evidence to show that cannabis is highly effective in the treatment of many conditions, and in chronic illness its health benefits in ratio to harmful side effects make it a far less damaging choice for long-term use than pharmaceuticals. Medical marijuana research has also refined its properties to a science. It is now known that the non-psychoactive cannabinoids found in marijuana have medical properties as well as the THC components known to produce a high, making it possible to treat conditions with fewer of the mind-altering effects associated with pot. Medically regulated facilities dispense a product that has been reliably graded for every constituent. When it comes to recreational use of pot, there are advantages as well. Let’s be honest — people are always going to use recreational drugs, whatever the legalities. In a field that includes alcohol, crack, OxyContin and heroin, pot is by far the lesser of the existing evils. People who over-indulge or mix pot with drugs and alcohol are capable of causing damage both to themselves and to others, but no one has ever died from an overdose of the drug itself. However, I cringe when I think of the Pandora’s box that could be opened when marijuana becomes generally legal. Why? Because responsible use is one thing, but people are greedy idiots. Just as it did with cigarettes, Big Business is going to shove marketing campaigns and enticing new products down our throats in order to make as much money as possible with no thought to the consequences. And their greatest victims will be teens. Teens have tuned out warnings about marijuana because the nay-sayers are usually fundamentalist adults who rant that pot is a “gateway drug” that inevitably leads to ruin and damnation. Since this is patently absurd, it’s easy to ignore the dangers, but they are real. Chronic pot use among adolescents is far different than with adults. Teens are at a phase in life where they are developing the coping skills that will serve them into adulthood. When the world is enveloped in a pleasant fog, you neatly avoid the uncomfortable and anxiety-provoking feelings that a more direct look induces. You never learn to cope with unpleasantries. As a result, teens who smoke pot on a daily basis are 60% less likely to get a high school diploma or university degree and seven times more likely to attempt suicide in early adulthood. Getting stoned with your buds on occasion is one thing, pretty much everyone does it. But habitual daily use of pot before the age of 17 can handicap you for life. So, I have a parting message to those who are still chronologically young: Don’t be an idiot. All of those people who you are hanging out with and want to fit in with will be gone by the time you hit your 30s, but you will still be stuck with the choices you made. Be responsible with marijuana. It’s a powerful drug. It has the potential to do both great good and great harm. The choice is entirely up to you. Medical Marijuana Patients Concerned About Senate Bill 791 We talked to The Rhode Island Patient Assistance Coalitions’ JoAnne Leppanen about a proposed bill in the Senate that has a lot of caregivers and medical marijuana patients concerned. She not only shared their concerns, but gave us a quick history of medical marijuana in RI. “The original legalization of medical marijuana was really an act of compassion on the part of the legislature,” says Leppanen. Yes, recreational users were getting arrested – but so were patients for whom the drug provided a sometimes life-altering treatment option. “It was a big deal in 2006, when it became legal for licensed patients to use marijuana,” she explains. There was an awkward period during which use was legal, but selling or purchasing was not. “Where were they supposed to get it?” asks Leppanen, pointing out that not everyone has the skills to grow their own. So the legislature decided to allow caregivers – people who could grow for a small number of patients. These caregivers are licensed, over 21, without criminal records, and act only with the consent of their patients. As described by Leppanen, these caregivers are usually drawn to the opportunity to alleviate suffering, and are especially valued by patients whose conditions may make it hard for them to travel, communicate or take on jobs with health insurance. “We have some phenomenal caregivers who really help their patients,” she says, describing caregivers who pursue much smaller margins – or no margins – to help patients in particularly challenging situations. These caregivers would all be made immediately illegal if Senate Bill 791 were to pass. This bill proposes that only licensed growers would be allowed to grow cannabis. Before you say, “that could make sense,” the bill further suggests that there be only two licensed growers in the state, and that they could only sell to licensed compassion centers (currently three in RI). These two growers would apply for state licenses – but why only two, and why it seems a good idea to grant these two what amounts to a state-approved monopoly is unclear. Could it be to position them for a future, post- legalization market? Leppanen declines to speculate – especially when it comes to any discussion of legalization. “We’re about the medical care and supporting those whose medical conditions are effectively treated by cannabis,” she says. “This bill would undermine the most basic tenet, the primary intent of the medical marijuana program. The compassion centers are great – there’s definitely a crucial role that they fill – but many of the patients who greatly need medical marijuana are on SSDI or disabled. Their income is limited, and there is no third-party reimbursement for medical marijuana. A compassion center has overhead and employees – it has to run like a business. It can’t provide the same attention, the same prices, the same access for those who can’t get to centers, and the same room for individual grace that caregivers can. Caregivers are the unsung heroes of the medical marijuana movement,” she explains. And this bill would end them. “So … why, exactly, do we need this,” she asks, “and who would it help?” The bill has not passed the Senate Judicial Committee and has no corresponding bill in the House – two steps that would be necessary before the legislature could vote on it. But there seems to be some heavy lobbying support behind it, and a cadre of senators backing it. You can learn more at ripatients.org, where they include links to the proposed statute itself. Phillipe and Jorge’s Cool, Cool World: Traffic Snarls, Political Fools and Art Makes Everything Better Newport Nightmares Ah, Newport. Sailing Capital of the World. City by the Sea. Rhode Island’s #1 tourist attraction. And seemingly determined by state and local pols and planners to make a visit there as unpleasant as possible. P&J refer to the ill-conceived need for a median strip on the Newport Bridge, an overreaction of the first order. The bridge has been reduced to one lane in both directions as of April 6, and the eastbound lanes’ EZ Pass lane was closed, which has resulted, by the RI Turnpike and Bridge Authority’s own calculations, to warrant an hour’s delay in the morning and evening commutes. Some fun, eh kiddies? P&J have seen this backup firsthand, and have considered doing roadside gun stands at both ends of the bridge for those drivers who want to buy a Glock or Sig Sauer and simply put a bullet in their heads as they try to get to work before noon, or home before “Jeopardy” ends. (And if you want to see a real car bomb go off, if there are still lane restrictions on May 5, the day festivities for the Volvo ocean sailing race begin, which Newport officials have humped harder as an attraction than Disney does Orlando or Walter White did crystal meth, expect fireworks galore.) RITBA officials claim all this work will be done by May 1. Why not? Who has ever heard of a major construction project in Little Rhody going over its projected deadline or costing more than anticipated? (Take a bow, former governor Ed “Gerber Baby” DiPrete, whose state contract to build the new Jamestown Bridge not only ran over time-wise and cost-wise, but didn’t have a clause saying that the contractors would pay for lateness, and instead left the great unwashed of Vo Dilun on the hook for the massive cost overruns. Full gainer into that Dumpster, Gerb.) So keep bringing those Indonesian pee bottles with you folks, and don’t expect to get across the Bay in less than 60 minutes. Worse is all the construction roadwork being done on Broadway in Newport, which for many is the only way into town unless you know the back routes — and even some Newporters don’t. The town planners did this to Washington Square businesses two years ago at the height of the tourism season.

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