National Tragedies Rabbi Doniel Z. Kramer, Ph.D. and Individual Chaplain (LTC-ret), USAR; Board Certified Chaplain, Hudson Valley Veterans Affairs Healthcare System Suffering Rabbi Kramer is a retired Army Reserve chaplain, and has completed 40 years as a VA healthcare chaplain. Born in Philadelphia, he received his BA, MA and Ph.D. degrees and Rabbinic ordination at Yeshiva University and RIETS. He has also been a synagogue/community rav, a college instructor and is a past National Director of the UJA Rabbinic Cabinet.

VISITING THE SICK: RESTORING THE BERACHAH OF “HAMAKOM” TO ITS PROPER “PLACE”

here was a wealthy and about the hospitalization and told was sitting shivah, and he told his wife miserly Jew to whose house a his wife that he had to visit the poor smilingly that he had to visit the son poor man came, looking for beggar since bikur cholim, visiting the and perform the mitzvah of nichum Ta morsel of food to sustain himself. sick, is such an important mitzvah. avaylim — comforting the mourners. The miser refused to give food to The next morning in the synagogue, His wife asked why he was in a good the beggar, but after repeated pleas, the miser heard that the beggar had mood, and the miser responded that the miser dug into his garbage and died, and he told his wife that he had he was joyful that with one lousy pulled out a piece of old, rotten fish, to attend the funeral, sincelevayat piece of fish, he was able to fulfill four which the beggar devoured. Late that hamait — escorting the deceased to essential commandments: hachnosat afternoon, the beggar became sick a final resting place — is also a very orchim — feeding a hungry guest, and was rushed to the hospital. At great mitzvah. That afternoon, the visiting the sick, attending a funeral, the evening service, the miser heard miser learned that the beggar’s son and comforting a mourner.

I am honored to dedicate this Tisha B’Av issue of Torah To Go in memory of my dear and revered parents, zichronam livrachah, whose professional rabbinic and rebbitzen roles were but a reflection of their personal commitments to care for and pray for the sick as well as comfort those in mourning. If I have mastered any of the caring skills expected of a rabbi/chaplain, it is due to their example and teachings. In this season of mourning, may we all merit to again hear the clarion call of the Almighty, no longer hidden from us — “Nachamu, Nachamu Ami” — may we all be comforted with the imminent coming of the Messiah and a world where all people will be at peace, “Uva leTzion Goel” — and may the Redeemer come speedily to Zion, .

31 Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary • The Benjamin and Rose Berger CJF Torah To-Go Series • Tisha B’av 5779 In a Talmudic passage ( 127a), we are taught a lesson so essential that it is incorporated into the daily morning prayers. Bikur MAZAL TOV! cholim — and the other mitzvot Koren Publishers mentioned above — constitute a celebrates the completion of very small number of good deeds whose performance guarantees a just reward in this world and THE NOÉ EDITION undiminished returns in the world to come. KOREN TAL M U D BAV L I Properly, as the Rambam (Hilchot De’ot, 3:3) writes, we should lead a healthy lifestyle and take care GET THE of ourselves so that we are well SET! and able to serve Hashem in a 42 VOLUMES wholesome manner. Those who now $1600 follow the Divine commandments and are righteous will be spared from illness (Ex. 15:26). However, perfection in life is rare, and while we don’t understand the ways of God, sometimes sickness comes to help us change our ways and repent. At other times, The Hebrew and Vocalized [menukad ] as with Avraham, sickness can Aramaic text is and punctuated Rashi be a natural process of healing, duplicated next and punctuated Tosefot commentaries such as following a prescribed to the English to facilitate circumcision. The fact that the translation in pronunciation and Torah (Ex. 21:19) permits a trained logical units. comprehension. doctor to heal others, though the Dialogue and poetic phrasing The Mishna and Talmud sickness itself has Divine origins, is texts are vocalized, are presented proof of the dictum that we should punctuated, and always strive to seek out the best with distinct line completely digitally breaks, facilitating reset for greater treatments to improve our life comprehension. clarity and legibility. spiritually and physically, while believing in God as the arbiter of Thousands of full The direct translation The translation is accompanied life and death. color illustrations of the text is in bold, by thousands of informational throughout the Talmud while the elucidation Notes and extensive indices Besides the medical care from a bring to life specific and explanatory text of Background, Language, is in a lighter font. Personalities, and Halakha. professional that may be rendered textual references and background. information to the sick, our tradition recognizes Original, uncensored passages of the the very special healing power that Talmud have been restored based upon can come from family, friends, careful study of medieval manuscripts. and even strangers who ask about our health, and who desire to Sets available online at www.korenpub.com provide assistance; thus bikur and at your local Jewish bookstore. cholim becomes a major religious

32 Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary • The Benjamin and Rose Berger CJF Torah To-Go Series • Tisha B’av 5779 paragon and activity. Just as God Divine presence that uniquely hovers recite a prayer asking for a merciful visited Avraham when he was ailing over a sick person. recovery. after his circumcision to comfort 5. When praying in the presence of him, so too should we emulate the a sick person, we may pray in any Almighty and visit those who are ill The common language so that the patient will (Sotah 14a), as we are instructed in understand and be appreciative, but the Torah, “After the Lord your God denominator of if praying away from the sick one, we shall you follow and emulate” (Deut. should recite the prayer in the Holy 13:5). Interestingly, it is a suggestion these laws is that Language — Hebrew. by the non-Jew Yitro, when he came to the Israelite encampment to visit merely “by going,” 6. We should not just pray for a his son-in-law, Moshe, and said to specific person alone, but should also him: “…and you shall tell them [the our caring presence include in the prayer the hope for Israelites] the way that they should go” healing for all who are sick among the (Ex. 18:20), which has found its way and visit to the sick, Israelites, and say: “May Hamakom, into the codification of Jewish Law. the One who is in every place, be Our Rabbis (Bava Metzia 30b) have when possible and merciful to you among the sick in said that this phrase, “that they should permissible, is most Israel.” On Shabbat we should say, go,” specifically teaches the mitzvah of “On Shabbat it is not permitted to bikur cholim. The Maharsha explains efficacious and cry in pain, and therefore may a quick that the key fulfillment ofbikur cholim recovery come.” is predicated upon “going” — going desirable, together 7. We might suggest to a sick person to visit the sick and allowing our that he or she might feel less burdened mere presence to serve as a source of with heartfelt prayer if loans were repaid or if property healing and inspiration. to the Almighty that might be restored, without any fear The Code of Jewish Law, theShulchan of death — so that a sick person can Aruch in Yoreh De’ah 335, teaches in His merciful healing feel strengthened to properly attend to detail how we should ideally visit in personal affairs. the following 10 paragraphs: be sent to the ill one. 8. We should not visit those with 1. Relatives and friends (whose severe internal, psychological, presence may bring immediate neurological or ophthalmic diseases or 4. Halachah is very mindful of the consolation) should visit quickly upon other such difficult health issues when need for a sick person not to feel notification of illness; those who are it will be laborious for them to talk or embarrassed or inconvenienced, so more distant, after three days. communicate, unless we know for sure generally, we should not visit during that the visit will be appreciated and 2. Stature makes no difference — the the first three hours of day, when helpful. Rather, it may be preferable to great should visit those who are young treatments may be administered and visit their home or nursing station and or small, even many times during the sick one is thereby feeling a little inquire how we can be helpful to them the day, as needed, as long as the better at that time, because a visitor in terms of cleaning or the like; and visitor is not bothering, burdening, or might think that there was so much when hearing about these challenging inconveniencing the sick. The Maharil improvement that we need not pray cases, we should be moved to want to says that an enemy should visit a for the sick. We should generally also pray that God’s mercy be upon them. sick person, but the Rema disagrees, not visit during the last three hours of feeling that such a visit could bring the day, when a sick person may be in 9. We should visit non-Jewish sick much discomfort to an ill person. tremendous pain, and a visitor might people, too — “mipnei darchei shalom” — because such visits will engender 3. A visitor should not stand over a feel that prayer would not be effective. Ultimately, we do not fulfill the and foster peaceful relationships in the sick person but rather sit alongside, world. out of respect for the Shechinah, the mitzvah of bikur cholim if we do not

33 Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary • The Benjamin and Rose Berger CJF Torah To-Go Series • Tisha B’av 5779 10. With internal illnesses where The Rema’s concluding words are truly personally performed acts of care is more intimate or sensitive, discussing the relationship between “gemilut chasadim”— extending many for modesty purposes, it is best that visiting the sick and comforting kindnesses —which have no limit … a male not treat a female, although a mourners deserves our attention. We and they are all manifestations of the female could care for a male. began by stating that bikur cholim is Biblical teaching that “One should love one of a small number of good deeds The Rema adds: Some suggest that one’s friend/neighbor as oneself …”(Lev. “whose performance guarantees a sick person’s relative approach the 19:18). a just reward in this world, and local rabbi or Torah scholar and In paragraphs 2 and 3 of Chapter undiminished returns in the world ask that person, who has attained a 14, the Rambam discusses how the to come.” This list does not include lofty spiritual level, to pray for and mitzvah of accompanying a visitor comforting mourners. On the other seek Divine assistance in sending is properly accomplished — in hand, comforting mourners does take a merciful healing to the sick. It is contrast to our opening story! Only precedence over visiting the sick. also customary to recite a prayer for in paragraphs 4 through 6 does the sick during the The codification in theShulchan the Rambam discuss the details of in the synagogue, and even to add a Aruch, Yoreh De’ah of the chapter bikur cholim. Paragraph 7 concludes new name in very serious situations, dealing with the laws of bikur cholim with the teaching that the Rema because a name change may help avert appropriately and chronologically will later repeat, “It appears to me an evil decree upon the sick one with precedes the chapters dealing with that comforting the mourners takes just the original name. death and mourning. In the Rambam, precedence over visiting the sick, his order of these laws is more because comforting the mourners Finally, the Rema quotes the teaching puzzling. Rambam has no chapter pays tribute to and is concerned with that for a person who has time to do dedicated to . Rather, kindnesses shown to both the living only one mitzvah, it is preferable that bikur cholim he has a 14-chapter section called and the dead.” Chapter 14 thereafter priority be given to visiting a grieving , the laws of mourning. continues and concludes with mourner during shivah instead of Hilchot Avel Only in the 14th and final chapter, laws concerning the deceased and visiting the sick because in the former after dealing with all aspects of death, mourners. case, we are paying respects and does the Rambam introduce the honoring not just the living but also We see that the Rambam codifies importance of in its first the deceased. bikur cholim these laws of gemilut chasadim not in halachic paragraph: a chronological manner, but rather The common denominator of these by their spiritual and cosmic impact מצות עשה של דבריהם לבקר חולים ולנחם laws is that merely “by going,” our and effect where “comforting the אבלים ולהוציא המת ולהכניס הכלה וללוות caring presence and visit to the sick, mourners” — — takes האורחים ולהתעסק בכל צרכי הקבורה ... וכן when possible and permissible, nichum avaylim .precedence לשמח הכלה והחתן ולסעדם בכל צרכיהם is most efficacious and desirable, ואלו הן גמילות חסדים שבגופו שאין להם together with heartfelt prayer to the There is another area wherebikur שיעור אף על פי שכל מצות אלו מדבריהם Almighty that His merciful healing cholim and nichum avaylim share a הרי הן בכלל ואהבת לרעך כמוך כל הדברים be sent to the ill one. When visiting, unique similarity that has not been שאתה רוצה שיעשו אותם לך אחרים עשה we should be sensitive to the needs extensively discussed. In the laws in אתה אותן לאחיך בתורה ובמצות. and state of mind of the sick, and not Yoreh De’ah 335:6 cited above, the extend a visit too long to the point It is a positive commandment instituted quotes the Talmud that it becomes a burden. We should by the Rabbis to visit the sick, and (Shabbat 12b) that we should bless inquire how we might be helpful in comfort the mourners, and prepare a the sick with a blessing that addresses running errands or doing some other dead body for burial, and fete and honor God as Hamakom: a bride, and accompany visitors as המקום ירחם עליך בתוך חולי ישראל. meaningful activity, and the topics of conversation should be uplifting. they are leaving, and be involved in all May Hamakom, the One Who is in Therefore, it is best to not talk about aspects of burial … and rejoice before a every place, be merciful to you among the the sickness or deaths of others if that bride and groom and care for all of their sick in Israel. could depress the sick one. needs, since all of these commandments

34 Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary • The Benjamin and Rose Berger CJF Torah To-Go Series • Tisha B’av 5779 Interestingly, this blessing is not an explanation by Rav Soloveitchik one who is sick with the term that frequently recited, especially since we offered in connection with the indicates the presence of death. may pray in any language. phrase in the Haggadah where God When we are careful with our prayers is addressed as “Baruch Hamakom, By contrast, the blessing of comfort and utterances and give them proper Baruch Hu”: thought, the blessing of “Hamakom המקום ינחם — extended to mourners The appellation of ha-Makom, “the yerachem …” extended to a sick — אתכם בתוך שאר אבלי ציון וירושלים May Hamakom, the One Who is in Place,” refers to God when He retreats person seems so appropriate. Indeed, every place, comfort you among the and seems distant, at times of travail, in the Siddur Yesod Malchut, this mourners of Zion and Jerusalem — trauma, and tragedy. Yet even when He prayer is listed as the climactic prayer is almost universally used among recedes to His Place, nonetheless, from to be shared with one who is sick: המקום ירחם עליך בתוך ]כל[ חולי ישראל. .Ashkenazic Jews, and yet this text is a distance ha-Makom appears to us not found in the Talmud or Shulchan When God relates to us from a distance May Hamakom be merciful to you . The just says Aruch Gesher Hachaim we refer to him as ha-Makom. Therefore, among [all] the sick in Israel. that it is a “traditional blessing.” The when we console the mourners, we use Alay Tamar on Moed Katan, chapter the appellation ha-Makom, and we say, May healing quickly come to those 1, mentions that our current text “Ha-Makom yenachem etkhem …” who are ill so that we need not recite this berachah often, Amen. emerged around the Middle Ages With this explanation, the use of as a replacement for the traditional Hamakom in the prayer for the sick As a postscript, the various blessings for mourners said in a seems so appropriate (as it does for times mentioned above in the special Grace after Meals which fell one who loses a servant or animal Shulchan Aruch for visitation applied into desuetude. [I thank Rav Aharon or for one in captivity). During an primarily to an era when most sick Kahn for this source.] illness, we feel a sense of separation people remained at home, with no The Talmud inBerachot 16b mentions from and perhaps even abandonment full-time trained care-givers. In our another berachah that also includes by God. Ironically, even though day, when so many of our sick are the unusual appellation of God as we believe that God is imminently in hospitals or the like with 24/7 “Hamakom,” which is recited when a present where the sick person is, professional care, visitation times person suffers the significant loss of a and His presence hovers over the could be different and should be servant or animal: Hamakom yemalay sick bed, we still feel separated from guided by present medical needs lecha chesroncha — May Hamakom that Divine Presence due to the and the patient’s desires. replace your loss. spiritual and physical manifestation It is amazing how the thrust of of sickness, and we sense isolation Additionally, in the “Achaynu Kol Bait these halachot for the sick seem from God in our lack of wholesome Yisrael” prayer recited after the Torah to be built into the training that completeness. reading on Mondays and Thursdays, most Board Certified Chaplains remembering those who are in At the same time, perhaps this is receive when taking required distress and captivity, we address God why many no longer use this formula Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE) with the same formula that is used for for the sick. We do not want to units. The halachic concerns a sick person: “Hamakom yerachem emphasize this distancing from about the appropriate time and length alay’hem” — May Hamakom have God and would rather concentrate of pastoral visits, and the guidance mercy on them. on a healing that will bring the sick that visitors should let the sick person person closer to the Almighty once guide the conversation in a manner Why is this Divine name, again. Another reason might be that that would be most beneficial to the “Hamakom,” only used in these since it is easy to confuse the word patient, and the expressed desire blessings where there is some sort “ ” — have mercy, addressed to offer to recite a prayer for those of loss or hurt? In the Passover yerachem to a sick person, with the word in need of healing, are all standard Haggadah, An Exalted Evening (p. “ ”— be consoled, addressed chaplain practices. 45), featuring the teachings of Rav yenachem to a mourner, we want to make sure Joseph B. Soloveitchik and edited by that we accidentally do not address Rabbi Menachem Genack, there is

35 Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary • The Benjamin and Rose Berger CJF Torah To-Go Series • Tisha B’av 5779