Sermon Notes Mother’s Day 5/10/2020

First I would like to wish all the moms, step-moms, grandmothers, and moms-to-be the very happiest Mother’s Day! And we pray that you are doubly blessed, honored, and celebrated today and every day for all that you do for your families. And let’s face it--moms and dads and anyone in a care-giver role has been catapulted to the next level in the past few months. We were already doing so many things, but we also got involuntarily transferred into being home-school teachers, many of us while continuing to work at our own jobs from home. Some of you are parents of college students who had to navigate your children through the difficult transition of their college year ending early and abruptly and maybe that included an unanticipated move back home. Some of you have high school seniors who you are walking alongside as you all grieve the losses of the senior activities that you have waited so long for, like prom and graduation. Some of you have younger children who maybe have struggled with not being able to see their friends and teachers daily. Maybe your children are older and you haven’t been able to see them at all other than through a computer screen. You have all made a tremendous amount of sacrifices in the past few months that we never saw coming. Weddings, parties, social events, big life moments have been postponed or cancelled. But moms/parents we are persevering! We have kept our families on track even in the hardest, most unprecedented times. And we commend you for all you have done and continue to do to be the positive voice, the glue, the nurturer, a source of strength to your family day in and day out. Moms you are invaluable and we honor you today.

One of the things that became very apparent to me over the past few months is that our WORDS MATTER. Because sometimes that’s all we have. In a time where everything is closed and we are asked to remain home and separate from our families, friends, colleagues, church family--in the absence of face to face contact--all we have are our words--sometimes through phone calls, video chats, emails, texts, social media. Did you know that the average person says approximately 16,000 words per day! Now, some of us tend to skew that statistic! But the average person on a typical day will say 16,000 words. That is a lot of words!

And what do we use these 16,000 words to say?

I call this the ABCD’s of our words. Do we use our words to Affirm or alienate Build up or belittle Compliment or criticize Delight or destroy.

In our 16,000 words a day, a lot of those are used for business or school or just general everyday communication. But I have to believe that leaves us with at least hundreds of opportunities a day to speak encouraging words to each other--words of life!

But how often do we do the opposite?

How much time do we spend complaining about or criticizing others because maybe they didn’t do something the way we thought it should be done. Or maybe it makes us feel better about ourselves if we bring others down with our words. We have a tendency to be guarded, to look for things to be not the way we think they should be. We have a saying in our house--if you are looking for something to be wrong, you will find it every time. How many situations do we walk into looking to find fault with people or things? We all do it--going into work, maybe a store, a restaurant, everywhere. We have a tendency to look for the negatives coming out of the gate, and then we can’t get to social media fast enough to complain about it or write a bad review. How often--if something rubs us the wrong way, do we lash out with our words so that whoever wronged us knows! And we want everyone else to know too, but we hide behind our screens to do it. We tear up politicians and people who don’t share our political views, we blast people who disagree with us, we criticize when something isn’t done the way we would do it, we complain when someone has wronged us, but sometimes we don’t necessarily even know the whole story. Most of us have been on the receiving end of that too, the receiving end of the complaints and criticisms and we know first hand all too well that that doesn’t feel good to hear. It brings us down and cuts us to the core.

And even when we give compliments do we always follow them with a “BUT?” That was good, but … That was good but I would have done this. OR maybe “good job, but what you ought to do next time is…”

And what do we remember from that? Not the compliment, only the criticism.

How do people feel when they see us coming or when they see a text from us or an email in their inbox? Are they excited to see us or open our email because we uplift them, or are they immediately guarded because their expectation is harsh words, criticism, or complaint?

If we speak 16,000 words a day, then we have thousands of opportunities to choose to speak encouraging words, words of life to those around us! To our children, to our spouses, to the people we work with, to people we encounter at stores and restaurants. But sometimes we have to be intentional! Especially if we know it is in our nature to be critical.

God places so much emphasis on the power of our words that there are over 100 verses about it!

Proverbs 18:21 says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” In other words we will reap what we sow with our words--if we speak words of life, we will receive the fruit of that--but if we do the opposite and speak harshly or negatively, we will receive that fruit, which does not sound like something I want to do!

When I was young we used to say “Sticks and stones may break our bones, but names will never hurt me.” But that’s not really true is it?

Robert Fulgum, author of All I Ever Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten, said this: “Sticks and stones may break our bones but words will break our hearts.”

And the hurtful or harmful words we say can stay with a person forever.

Proverbs 12:18

The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

Words can pierce us! Just like a cut or even an operation--the wound heals but leaves a scar, just like hurtful words do, and the scars remain maybe forever.

But so can a compliment! An appropriately timed meaningful word of encouragement can carry a person for a very long time.

Ephesians 4:29 says this: "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what ​ is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."

Sometimes the power of an encouraging word can change the course of a person’s life! People will rise to the level of expectation! Doesn’t it seem like when we are told we are good at something, we work even harder to become better at that thing because someone saw something good in us? If someone tells you that you are great at a sport or music or art or math, it seems to follow that it drives you to want to keep being good at it and even to get better at it! There is an old familiar story about Thomas Edison…

As the story goes, one day young Thomas came home from school with a letter from his teacher in a sealed envelope that he was told to give to his mother. As she read the letter she became teary-eyed. Thomas asked what the letter said, and she replied, “The letter says you are a genius--way too intelligent for us to teach, that the school won’t be able to offer you anything, and that I am to teach you myself.” Thomas went on to become one of the greatest inventors of all time. As the story goes, years later after his mother had passed away, he was going through things in the house and came across an envelope. He opened it to find the letter from the school that said, “Mrs. Edison, your son is rotten and confused. We cannot teach him, he is not welcome to return to this school.”

Mrs. Edison had a choice that day--she could have read the real letter to her son and spoken discouraging words over him, or she could speak words of life. She chose to believe in her son and speak encouraging words that changed his life.

Moms/Parents--we are in the God appointed position to be able to speak words of life to our children thousands of times a day! We can speak words of encouragement over them, words of life that could go on to impact their futures. Church--we are in the God appointed positions to be able to speak words of life to everyone we come into contact with--coworkers, neighbors, cashiers at the store, people we come into contact with as we go to a restaurant or run errands. I said earlier that if we are looking for something to be wrong, we will find it every time. Well the same holds true for the opposite--if we are looking for the good, we will find it every time. Let’s be intentional about speaking words of life over our children, our spouses, our colleagues, friends, anyone we come into contact with.

May our words affirm, build up, compliment, and delight others!

Proverbs 16:24 Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, Sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.