The Never-At-Home Homeschoolers
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wffiy$ #f E*ffir$:€n# ri'|"iiiltriiri |I$,1'I !:.,.,lit'i irif1'r' lnspired education means letting kids lead the way BY PATRICIA Z.ABAI.tOS DECIDE To Do IT. Lurkonlnternet dictatestories with lineslike "Charizardfire- messageboards. Read the homeschoolingFAQs. spinnedMachoke and he almostknocked him Postthe questionsthat scrollacross your mind out!" Write it all down and tell him you find his at 4 a.m.:How do you know they'reworking at work fascinating.Roll your eyesonly when he gradelevel? What about socialization?Read isn'tlooking. the booksof educatorJohn Holt. ReadHome Go to the library.Introduce yourself to the Educationmagazine. Don't think of lunch children'slibrarian. Guide your kids to the New boxesor Halloweenparades or any of the other Booksdisplay and ooh andahh asif standing fripperiesused to makeschool look like fun. beforea candycounter. Explore beyond the Be Alice steppinginto that rabbit hole-falling, fiction section.When your kidswant to learn falling,not knowingwhat waits below. aboutdinosaurs, check out nonfictionwith lots Readthe researchand feelbolstered by it. of graphicsfor your son and a book of dinosaur Learnthat homeschoolersget higher SAT scores poemsfor your daughter.Check out biographies and more acceptanceletters from Stanfordthan of dinosaursculptor Waterhouse Hawkins and the generalpopulation. Print copiesofthe arti- youngpaleontologist Mary Anning, and a book cles.Save one set to convinceyour in-laws;make that showshow to make a Parasaurolophushat. paperairplanes with the restand call it a physics Checkout asmany books as the library allows lesson.Once you've begun homeschooling, the andyour family'sarms can hold. expertsstop mattering. The experts don't know Hike in the woods,visit goats,sail on a your children. Youknow your children. Tall Ship.Look for Picassoin the Museum Get to know them evenbetter. Notice what of Modern Art; look for clustersof monarch givesthem glee.When your son is six,find butterfliesin winter eucalyptus.See Chinese him bookson pirates;when he'stwelve, on the acrobatsand KissMe, Kate and a Mark Morris Romans.When he'sobsessed with Pok6monat dancebased on a typewriter.Take homeschool- seven,go with it-let him createmath problems ing classesin Spanish,drama, carpentry. Ignore involvingDigletts and Polywraths.Let him your husbandwhen he asks,"If you'rehome- 72 rnotherins i N4AY.JUNEzooa )) u:;ii/ i-i\ i rl I ",''i te- htm rdhis ;rhe rthe : Nerv trng he earn .thlots nosaur 3Laphies rs and a book fillshat. allows la um narch rinese l Morris reschool- gy:l r1'.Ignore home- /' '^g@ $ de il:--. wil!,s *i i**rnir-r;; t\€.y^P-o.o'!lHFrr- \ grsr ARR,IV€DJ(dI I 'l | j i ( t i t s ir o S n I L yl d, schoolers,why areyou neverhome?" out beginningreaders with puppies li; Stayhome. Make things. Relin- andballerinas. Leave them lying b, quishthe kitchen tableto walnut- temptinglyon the coffeetable, as your s( shellladybugs, cardboard castles, grandmotherleft out bowlsof Jordan sa Epsomsalt crystals, balsa-wood almonds.If shedoesn't pick them up, IE n( ,,t,, i,r\rr, stables,plaster-headed puppets, and readthem to her.Ask her to try out armiesof clayRedcoats. Abandon a word hereor there.If sheglares at SE .,111r,,1ji1tl) iii,,.,lii the scalemodel of the Parthenon you asif she'ssuddenly rs, don't ask cc \,Viir'.Ir'r, :,1 1 i i'il i(l i:1,r\ilr whenthe taskproves tedious. W'hen againfor at leastthree weeks. Iti mflffi&dffi ffi your sonis six,let him makea card- And don'tholler when shes dc I NTETItl[JPT boardmodel of a DanielBoone rifle, eightand sprawledacross the despiteyour issueswith firearms. couch,unable to pull her noseout th .d[. f[ffiAmtnf;ffi Help your daughterstitch a of Ramonathe Pest to emptythe flo ffihfl Kn-ffi- quilt and forgiveyourself when dishwasher.|ust asyou should no the colonialdoll's dress is still neverwake a sleepingbaby, never thr waiting,in pieces,to be sewn. interrupt a readingchild. Empty it cat Ignoreyour husbandwhen he yourself.'Whenshe slams the book to askswhy the cupboardsare shut two hourslater, notices the sa\ - filled with eggcartons and dishwasherhas been emptied, and fin, emptyyogurt contarners. says,"i'm sorry,Mama, I wasjust so als Don't panicwhen your daughter immersedin my bookl'hugher twice: the doesn'tread at six.Read to her.Check oncefor noticingthat you'veemptied Ge 14 lnotht-'rilg r NIAY. JUNE 2008 the dishwasher,and oncefor correctly usingstrips of constructionpaper. usingimmersed in a sentence. Givehim a book of origamigeometry GentleEnough for Readaloud. Read about the andwatch the blossomingof his gift goddessArtemis, readArtemis for transformingthat which is flat into Baby, RichEnough Fowl.Read about shells,read Shel threeglorious dimensions. Adults! Silverstein.Read until you'rehoarse. Leavethe laundry.Let dustturn for ReadRoald Dahl and discussirony; to velvetatop the blackpiano. Sure, readLemony Snicket and discuss you'rehome, but you'rebusy. Reading humor-when you'renot guffawing. is more importantthan cleaning I(eepreading aloud evenwhen your the refrigerator;tarantulas are more kidscan read themselves; keep read- interestingthan scrubbingthe toilet. ing aloud when they'rerz. As you Make sureeveryone gets fed, clean up andthe kids drive from placeto place, the lastmeal before you startthe next, developan obsessionfor bookson and savethe restfor the weekend.I(iss tape.Even TreasureIsland enthralls your husbandwhen he doesn'tcom- when read by a professional and ment and vacuums instead. '1 ! you're captives in the car. Try not Make friends.Meet otherhome- \h to careeninto the median schoolersat the park every stripat the shockof hear- Thursday.Sit in a knitting (f,ounder and Mother of two, ing your six- and nine-year- circlewith momsand the I' Adenailevelooed these old passionatelycritique occasionaldad while the product'swhen her eldestdaughter Stevenson'sdevelop- kids playfreeze tag and sufferedallergies to chemicals, mentof the character WWffiffiffitrffiMffi buildprairie houses from perfumes(t dyesand heryoungest Longlohn Silver. lfr 1'\ii{.}llll grassclippings. Realize daughterdeveloped eczema. \Whenyou try to show that they get moreplay- 1l\,111',{)liI /\l'.,1 i your son how to subtract time in oneafternoon than Pure& Certlfied lliiii,r double-digitnumbers by schoolkidsget in a weekof OrganlcIngredlents liningup columnsand t l l:i\,f'iil'.1i,i I ll: recesses.Help them resolve . Productscontain 7Q - 95o/o ]S borrowingtens and he l1lI 1i1(11.lii\l{ )ll, differencesover choosing CertifiedOrganic ingredients. screamsthat what you're teamsand playingin groups . Specificallyformulated for [our ii\li;1\f.lI ill l\lr, sayingmakes no sense, of three.Organize a writers' sensitiveskin. dan /\lti. l\,li)11! it made workshopand a historyfair up, rememberthat . Pediatricianrecommended. no sensewhen you were iii I I ill :r:'lli.jii and twice-yearlycamp- ut . No Parabens,Propylene Glycol, seven.Let him continue i I l/r 1"1 ing trips.Come to lovethe .+ 515,or Sulfates. sk computingin his head. t;iIIil.tllIlII'iir parentsof your kids'friends It'sfaster anyway, and he asmuch asyour kids love illt ii)lll I doesn'tneed a pencil. their kids. When, at rr, he sends In the dentist'swaiting acrossthe room,when a womanasks, "What rt themath text skittering floor,shouting that it'sinane and has aboutsocialization?i' suggest that your nothingto do with reallife, search daughterdescribe her socialcircle. 'When Internetand homeschooling your daughteris still talking )r the cataloguesfor math that doesrelate five minutes later,don't stop her as the 1it glancesat her watch. Availableat Fine RetailersNationwide. ,OOk to reallife. Find problemsabout woman savingsaccounts and architecture; Don't think aboutgrade levels. Visit Our Websiteto Locate ne find historiesof Arabic numer- Gradesare for eggsand maplesyrup. a StoreNear You. , and alsand Archimedes.Learn about Childrensbodies dont developat con- www.naturesbabyproducts.com ustso the Pythagoreantheorem with a sistentrates; neither do their minds. 88s-902-babvQz29) twlce Geoboard;Iearn to dividefractions Althoughyour daughterdoesnt read mem&ror the rptied , A percentage of all soles go to thirigt t ogoiirtnr"orre^r*, Q/ljN!! Nonne\ Babr Oganns - a ilbtidiary ol Nat&\ Babt hduds, 1n.., a Cntikni. roqoiltbn. MAY.JUNEzooB mothering 75 I "LikeJudith Warner's PerfectMadness, this sinequa non for new parents is highly T recommended." 0 -Librarylournal S tr aj n Parentins- h i;;: "' th fir .1, ur H,r. \\n r -,,rn- Srn,ller- ln i Brrhl rigrr Lrursrrg,.. so Slce1,i,rg, li{lilhr, ilil'l l) ,: . \i \\ -rrrl \I'lnr It \leuu' ftrr (hu ('lLiltheu Sar der Fnrnela Pnril far Set roc Socialcritic Pamela Paul ing gul exposesbaby "must-haves" at six,her conversationinciudes fieldtrip. Seea movie.Comb a beach. listr for whatthey are (shockingly wordslike clamberedand sodden. Notice that your children are l useless)and guides parents Althoughyour son hasn't memorized learningall the time-not just in thet towardwhat they really the multiplicationtable at eight,he the two hours or so you work wh< needto raisehealthy, can interpretLego building diagrams togethermost mornings,but all I intelligentchildren. that makeyour eyesblur. Focus on the time, with you and without you: l your children'sstrengths, not Beforebreakfast, as they build ooln ' this riveting book, Paul on what the neighborhood tl O Nl I a Legokingdom while listen- very much empathizes with the schoolkidsare doing. Let your Tl lil',11.( ingto ThePhantom Tollbooth anxieties of eager parents , childrenguide you. If your son A LlO tj I on tape.After lunch, tearing gently helps us wonder whether throughthebackvard we aren't, as a culture, going ill'llH:;i*:*:1T'"' GlrADE overboard-and deftly, read,giveherbooksonLEVELS iil?;X:i:ilil:ilil:. brilliantly, helps us see the U tape.Aim to challengeyour GR A i ) [ li doodles,writing comics, beauty in an alternative." that -Arlie Hochschild, kidswithout frustratingthem. A fi L:l:0 3 creatinga terrain for tiny You'llfind the right level. pewter figuresfrom The author of The Tine Bind m{S ffi $ I(now that somedays will Lord of theRings. After A\l D "This important book will help be hard.Your son will shout dinner,watching Rools Patri, ru|APLE parents become aware of how andsulk; you.