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The Crimson Bull Indiana University Contents --- i Ii 2 .THE CRIMSON BULL 2 THE CRIMSON BULL COYNED WORDS The editor wishes to express his most humble thanks and appreciation to those on the staff who have helped to make the operation of putting together this first issue of the Crimson Bull as painless as possible. These many-talented jewels of original ideas include: Rick Beckrich, whose talent with the artist's brush kept us all in stitches; Dyke Egnatz, whose explosive ideas and stories made the long nights shorter; John Bowers, whose excellent photography and photo layout put a little spice into the stew; Bosco Wrathen, our rolly polly photog with an eagle eye for sharp pics; Natalie Haddan, alias Niki, whose ex- cellent cartoons and illustrations (and talented hand at housekeeping), kept our heads above the steadily rising heap of torn up copy sheets; Gil Kett and Dick Knarr, whose unusual ability of both writing and cartooning is better than a double-decked Nash; Bob Conklin, our ace flatfoot of the advertising game; John Foster, our production manager, who covers so many miles each week he thinks that he'll try out for the 500 classic; Marti Smar, whose unique rhym- ability and constant good humor helped to ease the load; Bob Lewis and Emma Livingstone, whose technical aid kept us from enrolling in Logansport. Special thanx to Sgt. Tom Smart, victim of the Board of Appeals, the sparkplug who got the lopsided ball rolling; Chris Savage, our faculty adviser, with a censor of humor all of his own. ART COYNE. OF INDIANA UNIVERSITY 3 OF INDIANA UNIVERSITY 3 DEAR PLAYBULL Am very much interested in the shade To help commemorate the re-founding of The guy who wrote that poem on this of lipstick called "Dirty Red." Please the Bull, I have composed a poem: page is a fraud and a cheap imposter. send me information concerning where it The Bull is renewed Note this true poetic style of real genius: may be purchased. so no doubt some students Since the new Bull has arriven and we Sincerely yours, are going to be must accept its brands of humor like the Rose of Terre Haute Sincerely, poor farmer in Iowa accepts his summer Ogden Nash crop containing samples of both wheat and chaffs. I read you last issue of the Bull, and So we must also accept this additional want to thank you personally for the won- Bull which is being scattered hither and thither throughout our campus with the derful spread you did of me. We have received some advance notices ulterior motive in mind that we may except Sincerely, of your rawther poor imitation of what any laffs. Abe Lincoln we have been doing with montonous re- gularaity for the past two centuries. We Sincerely, feel that you culture-less Indian fighters Ogden "Airflyte" Nash It seems to me that the Bull being par- would be much better off if you slaugh- buffalo and less humor. Per- ody of typical life on a typical campus tered more CAMPUS ADDRESS: should contain some scenes of some typical haps it would be better if you would leave life to those who exper- students doing all the things that typical paradies of college Playbull Magazine students do ience college life. I refer of course to that wonderful pas- Sincerely, Jordan Hal! 327 time of ........ quoits. The Ivy League Association Sincerely, CITY ADDRESS: Lord Andrew Bakerfield Stardust, Stall 3 Thanks for the helpful hint from your Bloomington Let me tell you Jimmy, that thet there Outcast of Maidenform Flats. With the magaziny of youren is purty good and we heat on in North Hall, I am using foam down here in southern Indiana think the rubber Devine Deceptors as beer can And if you really want to write: world of it. Yessire bob, you boys know silencers by tap ng them to the bottom of all about all there is. We sure are proud the can. This also prevents tell-tale rings Crimson Bull on my desk top. of you and were wishing you all the luck. c/o Sigma Delta Chi Sincerely, With humblest appreciation, James Folstrum, A. B. '41 Morteza "Joe" Kazzerouni Ernie Pyle Hall 4 THE CRIMSON BULL I OF INDIANA UNIVERSITY 5 THE CRIMSON BULL INDIANA UNIVERSITY CONTENTS Cover-Our cover is our adaptation of the new school emblem originally designed by Dan Krivoshia. Coyned W ords- editorial ...................... 2 Dear Playbull- Letters to the editor ............ 3 The Outcasts of Maidenform Flats ................ 7 They C all It M usic ............................. 8 Lady in a Logic Class.......................... 11 What's New for the Cool Dad.................. 13 Sweetheart Section .......................... 14 The Saga of Living Lipstick ................... 16 Playmate of the Month......................... 18 Bullroar ...................................... 20 N ext M onth . ............................. .. 26 STAFF Editor in chief-Art Coyne Feature Editor-Dyke Egnatz Art Editor-Rick Beckrich Art Staff-Natalie Haddan, Gill Kett, Richard Knarr Photography Editor-John Bowers Photo Assistant-Bosco Wrathen cm Advertising Editor-Bob Conklin Production Manager-John Foster Layout Advisors-Emma Livingstone, Bob Lewis Typists-Doyle Bottom, Jim Sprengelmeyer Feature Writers-Martha Smar, Richard Knarr, Mike Finkelstein Contributors-Tom Smart, Bob Adams, Gene Sherman Faculty Adviser-Chris Savage PUBLISHED BY MARCH 1956 SIGMA DELTA CHI 6 THE CRIMSON BULL C 7 N} ' .k' /tt. r4, ~V I) J4 "Alrght-But how?" OF INDIANA UNIVERSITY 7 THE OUTCAST OF MAIDENFORM FLATS By "Seven" Ivory as Told to Richard Knarr I am sitting at the counter of the Gay Blade, a dull establishment run by one Benny O'Hara, when in walks a high - income tax bracket. He is looking very lonely. He orders a coffee from Benny and when Benny is requesting payment this joe "I can tell he is upset. He is stirring his coffee wit' the wrong finger." is pulling out of his coin-catcher a wad big enough to send a Hippo to a throat doc. Being a warm, friendly type guy as I am; I am hiking my carcas over to his boot'. Hi: I am saying. I am a failure. Oh, maybe a few: he is saying: The men in Australia may be fairly happy Lo: He is saying, and he is looking it I have no friends. with too. me. They found that my product is just the My own kids hate me. I have embar- thing to protect their elbows at rifle You are a stranger, are you not?: I am rassed them with their friends. Now they shoots! Otherwise, I am friendless. asking. tell their friends that I am engaged in He is feeling pretty low and I am sug- Only to those who don't know me: he an honorable profession like kidnapping. gesting that he esconces with himself to is saying. I own the 'Divine Deception' Corporat- his home. He is agreeing and is taking a Har! Har!: I am laughing. ion. I manufacture padding for women taxi. not overly endowed by nature. Pray be seated: he is saying. He is thanking me for listening and is Falsies?: I am asking. I am now seeing tipping me generously. He is not knowing I am not a praying man but I am sitting why he says he is friendless. I myself have that he is tipping me so well, but he will down like a pro. been the victim of misrepresentation and I come to that conclusion when he is trying We are saying nothing for a while as I was not too happy with the feeling. to pay the hackie. am sizing up this sharpie for the sticky- He is continuing: I have an artistic soul I am looking in his wallet and I am finger heist when he is leaving. I can tell that crys out for expression, but it is use- coming upon a business card. It is read- he is upset. He is stiring his coffee wit' less in my business. We always have to ing: LEFT FLAT? USE DIVINE DE- the wrong finger. follow the same pattern year after year. CEPTION. Life is cruel: He is saying. We have several types though. There I am keeping the card to send to my How so, my new found friend?: I am are our foam rubber models, our cloth second wife, and am turning me dogs to- asking. models, and our new self-inflatable models. ward a dive I know of. The last are the dangerous as a sudden Friend?: he is saying: Why women wish to trick a man thusly It is a long time blowout can ruin a lady's entire evening. since I have heard this word. Harken to I am not understanding; but then, I am my tale of woe. Women hate me for the embarrassment hardly ever thinking on such a high level. I may inadvertently cause them and the My mind is of a lower level. I am harkening. men hate me for the disappointment I hand He is beginning: To look at me you them. would say that I am a happy man. I have Is there no one who is liking you?: I a lovely wife and two charming kids. am asking. 8 THE CRIMSON BULL THEY CALL IT MUSIC By GENE SHERMAN Probably by now, most of you have seen "The Benny Goodman Story" and either accepted it as a diverting way to spend part of an evening, or were disappointed by comparing it with some other pictures of its type. If you're a jazz fan, it certainly must have been gone a little deeper, and you were unhappy with the liberties taken with the chronological order of events as depicted, or the false situations which were used to bolster the "story" which Hollywood feels is necessary to entertain the "average" person.
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