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We believe... Everybody has dignity... Everyone struggles with depravity... Everybody has a story... The body of Christ is intended to be a safe place for healing wounds... People will wrestle with God... People need to grieve their losses... People are not responsible for the damage done to them...but they are responsible for the damage they do... People want to be called to more... Transformation is a life long journey best done in community with fellow travelers... Copyright © 2000, 2005, 2006, 2008, 2010, 2012, 2019 by Open Hearts Ministry. Revised July 2019 All Rights Reserved. With the exception of the reprinted material copyrighted elsewhere, no part of this publi- cation may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the pri- or written permission of duly authorized agents of Open Hearts Ministry. Persons wishing to adapt or adopt these materials for their own use or programs may do so by special writ- ten agreement from Open Hearts Ministry. Inquiries are welcomed and should be sent to: Open Hearts Ministry 625 Kenmore Ave. SE Ste 350 #48859 Grand Rapids, MI 49546-2395 Phone: 269.383.3597 Email: [email protected] www.ohmin.org Printed in the United States of America. Where we are heading. Inside The Road of Honesty 1- Revealing My Face................................................ 1 2- Understanding the Culture of My Family............ 23 3- Naming My Abandonment................................... 43 4- Confronting My Betrayal...................................... 59 The Road of Repentance 5- Battling My Powerlessness................................... 73 6- Caught in My Ambivalence.................................. 89 7- Unearthing My Addictions................................... 107 8- Embracing My Sexuality....................................... 121 The Road of Loving Boldly 9- Enjoying Freedom in Christ................................. 135 10- Welcoming Kindness and Sorrow........................ 155 11- Walking the Road of Forgiveness........................ 171 12- Living With Gratitude......................................... 183 Resources for the Journey Appendix..................................................................... 191 End Notes and Works Cited....................................... 200 The Journey Continues Welcome back to Journey Group! You have been traveling-- We can see it on your face -- Down roads where you have left your imprint, And the journey’s imprint was left on you. In honor of being here together Let’s pray that this stop will make a difference, That we will not leave the way we arrived, That our meeting will not leave us unchanged, That we would not only encounter each other, But the Author and Redeemer of our stories. ! + Indicates Indicates Indicates Indicates Indicates Teaching Journey Group Homework Journal Additional Content Content Assignment Page Material 4 Session One Revealing My Face Leader Crib Sheet Session 1: Revealing My Face Goals • To ease the tension and build an atmosphere of safety. • To review the basics: Group Agreement and Abuse Definitions. • To facilitate an opportunity for all to share their vision. • To introduce the Body Outline. • To give time to start on Body Outlines. • To encourage dependency on God to carry us through our stories. Preparation r Order “The Journey Continues” guide from Open Hearts Ministry at least three weeks in advance. If guides have not arrived, send participants the pages (page 8-10) listing the seven areas to go on their Body Outline (have them write these areas out on 3x5 cards in preparation for Session 1). Also send the Homework Assignment: Preparing to Reveal My Face (page 2). r Have box of tissues, hearts, and Body Outline paper prepared. Sturdy paper, white preferred, 48” wide and about 7’ long will work well with clear packing tape folded over along the top and bottom. r Have many colors of washable markers (fine and broad), chalk (sidewalk), tacks, blue painter’s tape or 3M mini command hooks for hanging up outlines, construction paper, scissors, tissue paper (variety of colors), glue and/or small glue gun. r Consider having a box with extra creative supplies: strips of many colors and textures of fabric (1 1/2” to 4” wide), various colors and textures of yarn, feathers, leather, sheepskin, glitter gel, magazines with pictures, sheets of peel off stickers, paint, duct tape, many colors of “jewels” (to be glued on.) Journey Group Session (Determine which co-leader will do each part and how long you will spend on it. You have 90 minutes.) Make a time frame, working backwards, so you can spend at least 30 minutes working on the Body Outline. Plan for your success! 1. _____Ask participants to remain standing as they enter the room. When all have assembled, ask that everyone “freeze frame” their body to show us how they are feeling coming into this group. 2. _____Introduce leaders and participants. Use FORM (Family, Occupation, Recreation, Ministry) or another form of very brief introductions. Have each person (leaders too) share their vision for this journey. Take note of key words used by each person. 3. _____Ask participants “How do you feel about your face?” and get a few sentences from each. 4. _____Read the Group Member Agreement, p. 13 together. Have each member read a section (offer choice to pass if uncomfortable reading aloud). Have everyone indicate agreement. 5. _____Read Looking at Typical Wounds, p. 14. Suggest that each member read a paragraph. Have them check or underline the phrases that apply to their story. 6. _____If time, look at Homework Assignment: Preparing to Reveal My Face in The Journey Continues, p. 2. Participants may have received this assignment when they signed up for Journey Group. 7. _____Cover Body Outline, p. 8-10, with more specific directions about how to draw. 8. _____Give time to work on the Body Outlines, playing soothing instrumental music to ‘cover’ the quiet. Allow approximately 30 minutes for this. 9. _____Homework for Session 2: Examining the Culture of My Family, p. 24. 10. _____ Do a feelings check before departing. Have people record a feeling word on their Body Outline and share with the group (see chart on p. 22). After Group • Use the leader processing sheets. • What did you observe as the participants were being drawn around and began to enter information on their outline? • Plan for the next session. One leader should tell their story. • Pray for the participants and yourselves. You have entered a worthy spiritual battle! Leader Guide Session 1: Body Outlines Safe Guidelines Please be aware that drawing a Body Outline may be quite difficult for people. It will reveal each person’s body image as well as the burdens his/her body has stored from stories. So here are some helpful guidelines: • Be flexible and allow people to take their time drawing around their bodies. • Give options and allow individuals to decide what they would like to do. Some may want to do it at home and bring it in. In such cases, participants may decide to trace around their own clothes rather than have another person trace their body. • Give individuals a chance to choose who they want to have draw around them. (In a co-ed group men trace men, women trace women.) • Instruct leaders and participants to not touch body parts or draw too close to the body. When drawing inside the person’s leg, only draw up to the knee and allow each person to finish his own drawing from there once you are finished with the rest of the outline. This also prevents clothes from getting marked on accidently. • Be sensitive about how people feel. Talk about how they feel during this exercise. Ask how it felt afterwards and what they learned about them- selves or others through it. • Remind people that this Body Outline is like a shadow and can look a little distorted; it is not a true reflection of what they look like. They may want to add hair or fingernails or whatever they can to make their outlines look a little more like themselves so they can identify with them. • Encourage creativity and be creative yourself. • Explain that the Body Outline will be used in each session, so it is important that everyone find a way to get it on paper. Let people be responsible for their own Body Outlines, bringing them back to group, storing them, etc. You will be amazed how effective this tool is in visualizing and getting at the lies and truths of the stories of our lives. Seek to celebrate and enjoy parts of yourself as you participate. Session 1: Revealing My Face When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man; I did away with childish things. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:11-131 We know you have been in the process of looking at your story. We are glad you are making the choice to go deeper and learn more about your story and The Author, Jesus. During the next twelve sessions you will learn more about faith, hope and love; and about your true face. Welcome to The Journey Continues. Session 1: Journey Map ! Homework t Preparing To Reveal My Face..............................................2 . Teaching t Taking Off Our Masks ......................................................... 3 t The Importance of the Details ...........................................