The Spiee Girls Are Not in This Issue!?!

Un-Exclusive Interview]

Dan Aykroyd and John Cusack's Advice lo YOU!

P i l i «

Porno for Pyros Nexus and Artists: Dishwalla Photo Pull-out Un-inked 2 A Thursday, April 24,1997 Daily Nexus

Check Out Our Jullar^QimeronTriiebesr11''!^^^? —¿hotographerof the VictoriatHUK worked to push photography to the leve Used Sale Bin of other fine wts, while champi -•ili need for recondition of wome Her exhibjgfon at^he Museum of f it, Annals Wisher,find V. Mers M l whicl House, is a cpilectioj^ha work ty po: ideal si ses jòf.kmo- tire career. H ||p h o tf lH B s 9 H ^ p o r - icence, beauty d a ste; st di^W ito traits of her mily, m elt» anWfemoi iexcel. a contempora igures such For tjpse interested in ¡evolution of John Hersc' Different s _ hotogpphy or lifeinJhfil Victorian . era, 10 CDs and compos^pggyge prevalent if this exhibit in de&aiielplàl-th the $1.50 her work, ranging front admission. Unfortunately, it lacks the ogy to simple portrait^ mass appeal that might be prevalent in a One of her most s' ig pieces, ‘The Stieglitz or Weston retrospective. Al ¡Young Endymion,’| iicts a young though her subject matter sometimes be­ [Greek prince sleep:' le forest. This comes repetitive, Cameron’s reputation [piece incorporates in’s soft-focus as one of the finest photographers of her [approach as well experimental era is well deserved. i techniques, render!! ierious diffuse Annals of My Glass House will run [forms above the sleep through June 1. For more information call I highlights include “The Da the SBMA at 963-4364. - scene uf embracing sistewy^ "...... Hanson

abstract train slices dia­ In celebration of the Emiliano Zapata, a man of centenary birth of artist gonally through the pic­ action and a peasant Get up to $4.50 in cash or and political activist Da­ ture, cutting across the vid Alfaro Siqueiros, the whole frame. A black en­ leader who is poignantly $6.00 in credit for each CD! Santa Barbara Museum of gine pulls a long caravan of portrayed between walls. Art presents Portrait of a cars so rapidly that it ap­ His huge moustache and Decade: David Alfaro Si­ pears as one blurred stripe face dominate the tableau, queiros 1930-1940. This of fierce red. And on these and the color of the floor art exhibition is the most flatbed cars stand scores of matches his reddish- extensive collection of Si­ soldiers in formation and brôwn skin tone. morninglory queiros to be shown state­ at attention while moving side, featuring 75 of his through the darkness. Portrait of a Decade: paintings, watercolors, They appear ready to jump David Alfaro Siqueiros, woodcuts and litho­ into combat at any 1930-1940 runs through usic May 11 at the SBMA. Also, graphs, and is well worth moment. the trip downtown. Each shape is reduced for those interested in The work shown in this to its most minimal form, learning more about the .. . _ Isla Vista collection is made up of re­ and here the dark palette history pf Siqueiros, the flections on the visions of imposes a feeling of vola­ museum will host a panel |y 5 j§ | % 910 Emb. del Norte his lifetime. “Tren militar,” tility upon the image. The discussion featuring scho­ (Troop Train), from 1930, spectre of death and fight­ lars and curators April 27 968-4665 43885 is one of these reflections. ing could come down un­ from 1-5 p.m. For more in­ It addresses the theme of formation call the SBMA expectedly at any time. at 963-4364. His 1931 “Zapata” is —Todd A. Hovanec just that —■ a portrait of

PRIZES:0””CBs *“ HOW TO GET YOUR TICKETS: Other SJEE Swag • At Reggae Tuesday at Calypso - 514 s t a t e St. • Spring Fever at SBCC • By Listening A ll Day Long!! Daily Nexus Thursday, April 24,1997 3 A

Battery Acid Blues Re t u r n in g t o . rder Stadium j u m p a m Good day, folks. was silent. They craned to hear his wis­ This is a rock ’n’ roll column, and I dom. “Yeah, there was a heart attack, but thought I’d inaugurate it with an excerpt so what? With all the smack that gets in­ from a documentaiy video release from jected around here, she was lucky to get the summer 1996 tour of a band called away with just a heart attack!” The Clap, quite possibly one of the great­ The congregation was stupefied. est blues bands to ever rock the world. “Yeah, uh, yeah,” he continued, but that Unfortunately, the band is no longer with was as far as he got before collapsing into us; the death of their lead singer in the in­ a coughing fit that during its course depo­ cident described below relegated the re­ sited at his feet his left lung, which, as maining members of the band to playing soon as its nicotine-darkened sliminess backup gigs on the oldies circuit. Still, hit the floor, slid down the ramp, gaining The Clap was a phenomenal band during velocity until it sped along the tile and out its two-month heyday, and the following the door before screeching to a halt and is but a slice of its meteoric career. disintegrating from exhaustion, nearly 183 feet from its gasping owner. “Yeah, yeah it’s like that!” The bass All along its path the black lung had player looked up at the crowd after the caused silent, open-mouthed stares from band took the bottom out of the last song the entire press corps. As the lung guigled of the set. “The last song, dammit,” he its last piece of oxygen it was beheld with thought to himself. intense curiosity by all, none of whom “There, you dupes,” he thought. “You thought for a second about the man from wanted your stupid hit song, didn’t you? whence it spewed — including himself, Well, tough shit. We wanted to play some until he realized he could not hold his other stuff first, songs that you didn’t like breath any longer. The loud gagging of the and didn’t want to hear, even though it’s singer brought eveiyone backfrom their on the same album as that hit song, ever own personal surreal universes, but not though it’s been on all of our last five re­ quickly enough for anyone to save him cords that none of you bought, so youi from his own excess. sorry selves had to sit through the whole The guitarplayerspoke first. “Well, evi­ TICKETS ON SALE two-hour show and six encores before dently we’ll be needing a new vocalist, you got to hear that song. Happy now?! preferably a nonsmoker. For all preening Ja-heez-us, who’d have thought that a jjjrima^lonnasmterestedjjjm

CAJMUP LO AND SPGCl Al SUR PR JSC QUGSTS May 4 •8:30pm University Center Hub Tickets for Spearhead and Camplo on sale now at the AS Ticket Office, Mominglory Music in Isla Vista or at all Ticketmaster locations including the Wherehouse, Blockbuster Music, Robinsons-May and the Arlington Theater. Or charge by phone 893-2064. For more information call 893-2833. Buy your tickets in advance. V I General Admisson prices for everyone at the door. 9J silly knockoff called ‘Your Mama’s a Ho’ ditions will be held tomorrow. Right would be a million seller? Yeah, it was guys?” l i v e m u s i c nice to beat the crap out of that Boyz II This evoked muffled affirmation from Men album and have them publicly kiss his band mates. Gradually the reporters our asses and all, but it’s a song, for cryin’ went back to their previous buzzing activ­ out loud, just a song, and we get to be im­ ity, and as the body was removed, the mortal musicians of the world? God, we questions came again, and the room now Acoustic can’t even read music.” regained the decibel level of the dull roar In the dressing room he looked in the it had achieved prior to the incident. mirror and tried hard to avoid the image While the other two band members and in th e Hub in the comer of his eye of the drummer on their legal and managerial cronies began the floor behind him being smothered by spin control in earnest, the bass player three groupiés at once. “Well,” quipped quietly slipped out. the bassist to his reflection, “if we are im­ “Wow”, he thought. “This is what we mortal musicians of the world, we should get for opening a tour in Las Vegas.” He The Giirl & I at least get our own dressing rooms.” recalled the maniacal antics of the prom­ Outside, his brother the guitarist was oter. Sure, they could fill Sam Boyd Sta­ W ednesday April 3D 4!3D-fi3D pm tfl signing his extended name onto the left dium on the strength of one hit song, a Great Food & Drink Specials at C h ilit@ S . cheek of a female fan. The fact that she fluke b-side from a neglected single, sure. Presented hy ASPB. UCen Dining Services. & Coca Cola was screaming with ecstasy while he was It’ll happen when Hootie flies. trying to do it severely hampered his That evening they were all baffled to penmanship. see the members of Hootie on TV fly and When the deed was done she promptly subsequently crash and burn in quite pos­ fainted in his lap. This would not have sibly file worst video ever made. “What been a problem if she had not weighed the hell,” thought the band. “Let’s pack Associated Students Program Board] 344 pounds Í2 ounces. “Damn,” he ’em in.” squeaked as 19 members of the road crew Of course, it was all different now. The Applications for 97-98 available now! pulled him free, “they grow ’em big in this Clap members would have to change neck of the woods, don’t they?” their image, their sound and their under­ All Board positions available. Later during the press conference the wear, just in an effort to get future singles band members were asked if they had played on the air, sandwiched between ★ Completed applications will not be known that a heart attack had taken place Dishwalla and Celine Dion, just so the at the venue during the show. “Now wait band could continue to eke out a rock- accepted after May 2. just a minute!” croaked the singer, whose 'n’-roll existence in some godforsaken strained voice by now Was practically in­ corner of L.A., next door to an oil derrick and around the comer from the charred audible, so that once it could be deter­ foundation of the Epitaph Records build­ mined by everyone else of his intention to ing, which The'Clap had burned down in yisit ASPB's Web Page for more information speak due to his wildly flailing hands, the protest to the existence of Offspring. http://www.as.ucsb.edu/aspb/ - other band members, their manager, and “Oh well,” said the bassist to himself. their lawyer had already vigorously de­ “At least we got to play Isla Vista.” nied the incident. By now the conference 4 A Thursday, April 24,1997 Daily Nexus

like slasher film or snuff Grosse Point Blank film ... isn’t that great of a film. In Not Artsweek: Soft fact, the story line that fol­ pom. lows John Cusack’s char­ Dan: Bill Murray and I acter, hit man Martin have actually talked about Blank, home for his high- Grosse Busters doing a pbm film where -O 1 ■ o B-casfra d id th is #«»■* «a ■«*■*«■* school reunion and an as­ we actually do all the fuck­ signment, isn’t that original. Neither are physical stuff a lot. But I thought [the vio­ ments what we do. ing. Where it’s us, you know. the ways the characters are portrayed. lence in the film] was an absurdist exten­ I’m fortunate to be in probably the We play like a couple of bad doctors or Nevertheless, when Artsweek was in­ sion ... so it wasn't to be taken literally... third greatest R&B band in the world, bad airline pilots. Us and our old cocks, vited to journey down to Beverly Hills for and it’s not like one of these Schwar­ when we are playing. I really enjoy it and I you know, just get out there and it’s us a free lunch and an interview with Cu­ zenegger movies where the violence has a think the Blues Brothers is one of the and there they are. It’s really them and it’s sack, Alan Arkin and Dan Aykroyd, we perverse sexuality to it, where people are most favorite things I’ve done as a film be­ horrible. ' didn't say no. getting off on it. It is just an occurrence in cause I got to dance, play harmonica, John: I’d like to audition The following interview is composed of this guy’s life that he deals with. write, perform. It was just a use of all the Dan: I’m telling you I think we could highlights from the hour-long panel dis­ Not Artsweek: You’re very successful talents that I guess were granted to me make a fortune with that ... you know, cussion, which had Artsweek and several in Hollywood. What type of advice genetically and that I’ve developed. “There they are, boy are they ugly, but other students participating. We hope would you give to young people that are John: I say just do what you want, you Wowl They didn’t use body doubles and you find it enlightening. just starting out as actors, young writers know. I like people that just do what they it’s them naked and they’re airline pilots.” and producers? w ant.... Most people would love to sing Not Artsweek: How should people in­ Artsweek: So do you think there's too Dan: Well, myself, I would Say that the on stage ... [some people] can get out terested in acting pursue it? much violence in the film? best way to guarantee a living in all of there on stage without hang-ups, that’s John: I would say just do something, Dan: With respect to what’s normally those places is to be a writer first. Start off for them and I like ’em. just act. People who sit around in coffee depicted in American movies or just by writing ideas down... write a script for Dan: Like Michelle Pfieffer in Fabul­ shops just talking about acting, just talk­ within itself as a film? yourself, like Billy Bob Thorton did. ous Baker Boys, like she never thought in ing about writing — just do it. Get in­ Artsweek: Well there’s been a lot of I’ve written. During my periods of un­ her life that she could get up and sing volved in a theater company. violence in the media recently and employment as an actor, I’ve written those ... songs and she was fabulous. Dan: When you first start out do every­ there’s been a lot of talk about violence scripts and written great jobs for myself, John: And even like Madonna, I don’t thing; when you’re young enough ... do

in the entertainment area, and I just and if you’re a director to have that writ­ enjoy a lot of what she does but I like the commercials, do plays, you know, the wondered what you thougjht of that. ing facility is incredible. If you are a pro­ feet that she’s doing what she’s doing, thing is not to compartmentalize oneself. Dan: Well, lihhhh, you know the sub­ ducer to have that writing facility is abso­ when she tries to act, when she tries to Go ahead and open up the whole range of ject matter obviously, the subject matter lutely key. write and sing, videos. ... I just like that talents and see where your limitations are lends itself to a little gunplay. The vio­ And so if you start nut as a writer and she does it. and then back off if you feel lence serves the story. you get a script sold, well you’re in the Alan: There’s this myth that actors are uncomfortable. When Martin Scorcese does a film ab­ business. You’re in. So I would say to always comfortable. ... They’re not, they out Mafia figures, there’s obviously vio­ people out there, “Don’t confine it to one just use that nervous energy. Take that ... In the beginning you do everything lence on the part of that lifestyle and I thing. Don’t just be an actor or think ab­ energy and use i t ... you’ll feel that confi­ and then you build a name and a think that what’s generic to the piece, and out [just] directing or producing. Be a dence, simply doing it any kind of film, reputation. it works, and I can’t say there’s really too writer first and from that seed a beautiful much. I mean, a family picture obviously career can grow and that writing facility shouldn’t have violence in it. That Darn will serve you forever.” Cat — you wouldn’t expect violence in As an actor, you’ll have a better under­ that. But just because of the subject mat­ standing of the scripts if you’re a writer. ter, people expect a little suspense and a You’ll serve the material better if you’re a o ut Already receiving extensive radio little gunplay. director, you’ll then have the facility to airplay, Failure has attracted alt-rock John: Also it depends on what kind of change the script to make it shootable or audiences, through the gravitational film it is. Doctor Strangelove is a great produceable if you’re a producer. I would pull of its album Fantastic Planet. I was teeejwly given tire opportunity to talk with' drummer Kelli Scott about ith; Bush. Artsweek:! heard Fantastic Planet. Now 4 have to ask, do people ever compare you to Bush? K e lli Scott: Well, actually yes. Bush, band, ! have to know what you think Nirvana Stone Temple Pilots here of ail the electronic music coming film. ... You have to pay attention to the say everybody in the creative trade should and th«é, I guess that’s all right ’cos out, m s « H tone of the film and what you are trying to do some writing.... John has a writing cre­ they're'selling a shitload of records. 'If anything it’s gonna make music say. dit on the movie. And I’ve made a good I How much do you feel you, as die that much cooler. I think it’s healthy. Dan: People have to select what they’re - living writing stuff for myself. And also in drummer, contribute to Failure? every film that I do, whether I credit it or H | "ou see that as competition — gonna view, and those who are offended As fer as hew songs were arranged tastes for bands wilt become by violence aren’t gonna rush out and see not, I end up changing dialogue or land tumingsongs into songs, it’s pretty HR? Donnie Brasco. writing. lequalina lofóf instances: In others, it' ... I guess if you’re acting always be It’s like rap in that it’s completely its John: It’s a violent world ... not. IKaPAndrews, our singer/guit I entity. But I think rock will always Dan: Is there too much violence in the generous and support the whole enter­ player, engineered the recora, But as a i. There are justso many new ap- jj media generally on TV and in films? I prise and you’ll look great. Support the bahd, J feei i pull my weight a ns out there. ',*■* ' would say... there’s no question about it. totality of the entertainment. ¡ÉÉrota» does it feel to ^a fa iM u were hired by Gargamel to But film media and entertainment are a Artsweek: What do you think about It feels great.to be a Failure! issinate any one of the Smurfs in refection of our society, and once that actors being bands? you explain die origin of the * he entire village, who would you starts to change then maybe violence wall Dan: (to John) Don’t you sing? [hawse?!? v .5 knock off? j;}* '- be [phased out somewhat]. I’m from Ca­ John: I sing a little. The name Failure came about ... ' Grumpy... v ' , ' nada and we don’t have the machine pis­ D an :... I think people who have that years before 1 joined the band, Nobody jjjyjtitiink that’s, a Dwarf, tol problem up there. bring a special gift to the world through had any idea that the band was going to Grouchy. J ; ||. , their talent, like Steve Martin plays banjo. Not Artsweek: I thougjht the violence be signed. You know, whafs the last Failure plays Toes Tavern on Friday was really fun. like it looked like it was And his musical ability will probably help thing in the World you want to call yo ght with Edna Swamp and local pop really fun. Was it really fun to do? him in his writing and in the whimsy of his band if you aré looking for success humour and in his delivery. You know, outfit Summer Camp, which opens the John: Yeah, yeah. I mean I like doing Being more, of a rock-orienteu show at 10 pm. ' . actors that sing in bands, it just compli-

JÉ presented by ■? Indus at UGS^ p re s e i^ a cheA P^tt& cuttare Th« 3rd Annual Cultural Show Festive Citrus Salad f COW'S j È An Evening of Dancing, Section I peeled pi ink and 1 peeled rwbu Add Chill 4 broad- ^ Pour juiced k Singings Music, Comedy, p red g r a j •efruit as shown. Repeat wittr ITbsp 1 brimmed wine over each and 4 peelec oranges and one peeled lime. chopped glasses. garnish with - a n d Fun fn ásh a fresh mint sprig and a I visions* ^ strawberry. ■ Sprinkle with confection ers sugar. Serves4 Saturday, fipril Z6 COJO’S is getting BIG G ER .< Campbell Hall. 7-9pm , and ^ » e tte n ! Custom Turkey Sandwich $3 Student/$4 Non-Student We’re expanding our inventory so you’ll WITH SALAD & MEDIUM SODA O N L Y & 0 9 9 have a lot of NEW things to choose from! WITHTHIS CARTOON ONLY Percentage of proceeds given to organization devoted to helping fee jpbo^ofindiä 915 Embarcadero Del Mar • 968*1316 TellerQuick In-Store ATM % Open Daily from 7am to Midnight ATM and Major Credit Cards Accepted | Daily Nexus Thursday, April 24,1997 5 A It's an Artsweek Photo Essay!

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Artsweek wenttothe SB County Bowl last Friday for the Earth Day concert with Porno for Pyros and Dishwalla. This is what you missed.

m i I 'v '. Photos by and some other guy J e f f C la r k

ana Ambers will, beginning at 9 p.m. If neither of you feel like rock ’n’ roll, Hey, What's Going on it’s old school and hip-hop dance night at i Emerald City. Every week students will show off a tractor. ' was even funnv or not. I’m back and boy have I got a surprise Wake up by 4 p.m. on Friday, jam in Do you have a criminal White or dark meat? for you. Grandpa’s cornin’ to town! grandpa’s false teeth, and head back to iheir art in the College of Creative record? How about no meat a That’s right, Grandpa Hector, all the way the MCC Theater for It’s Elementary— a No, I don’t think so. all? from Fresno Correctional Facility. So you film portraying teachers who fill their stu­ Studies Gallery. While they are there What the hell is the What is the meaning o better show him a good time. dents with respect for all people. dealzvith$hemp?Washe life? After his Buick pulls up this afternoon, Then it’s off to Toe’s for a band grandpa Artsweek will bother them with a truly a Stoodge? I guess it would be do be sure to cruise straight to the 3:30 dis­ will relate to: Failure, with both Ednas- I can’t remember if he ing it for the hell of it. cussion on The Celluloid Closet about wap and our veiy own Summercamp bunch of questions irrelevant lo iheir queer representation in film, in the Multi­ opening at 10. cultural Center Theater. If gramps wants You can also get him to skank at Emer­ art. more choices, then how about “From ald City with The Upbeat. Omphalopagus to an Asian Diaspora: If you can pry him off the can for a few Chelsea Squvrcs is a se­ Post-colonial Studies in a Pacific Cen­ hours Saturday, you and gramps need to nior art studio major. Her tury,” a lecture by Greta Ai-Yu Niu at 4 hear the Eastern European sounds of the work will be on display at p.m. in the Women’s Center? women’s vocal ensemble, Kitka, at the the College of Creative And you can go back to the MCC Thea­ MCC Theater at 8 p.m. Studies now through April ter at 8 p.m. for Cornucopia, a multime­ And hey, since he loves that piss-driven 26. dia art presentation featuring tunes from instro, take Grandpa to Hector to Los In­ Artsweek: If you were Wooliver, The Maginot Line and Water fernos, Blazin Haley, Back Alley Gators an alarm clock, hoiv Boxer. and Slick 6 at Toe’s. would you wake me up in Once you’ve got him cultured, edu­ By now, he’s either had a heart attack, the morning.? cated and bathed, take ’em downtown to passed a few stones, or is simply home Chelsea Squyres: I Toe’s Tavern and make him rock to the sick for that electro-shock therapy, so bid would drive over vou with sounds of Fidget, Cool Water Canyon him a farewell and get some rest. 6 A Thursday, April 24,1997 Daily Nexus

THE We GUARANTEE you’ll be in a class of 15 students or less. Call today to After These] PRINCETON make sure you’re one of them. REVIEW (800)-2REVIEW (805)-685-2221 Messages

Spring LSAT Course LSAT Challenge Course #530 Preparation for the June 16,1997 LSAT M k THE University Village Plaza PRINCETON K a p a h y 7127 Hollister Ave., Suite 110 ■ 1 REVIEW Goleta CLASSHOURS 46 instructional hours. 21 instructional hours; in Testl Set., Aprll 26 9:00am-1:30pm som e places 18. Lecture 1 Sun., April 27 10:00am-12:30pm PRACTICE T h e 4 most recently 3 LSATs, but not always Lecture 2 Tues., April 29 7:00pm-9:30pm released LSATs are the m ost recent ones. TESTS Lecture 3 Thurs., May 1 7:00pm-9:30pm administered under timed, test-center conditions. Lecture 4 Sun., May 4 10:00am-12:30pm Lectures Tues., May 6 7:00pm-9:30pm SEX! Individual meetings with C atch your instructor before (ME-atONE Lecture 6 Thurs., May 8 7:00pm-9:30pm CONDOMS! WTTHYWlR your instructor several or after class; or sign up for LUBRICANT! INSTRUCTOR times regularly scheduled tutoring sessions with up to Lecture 7 Sun., May 11 10:00am-12:30pm throughout the course. 3 students at a tim e (but it BARCLAY CARDS! Lecture 8 Tues., May 13 7:00pm-9:30pm won't always be with your Barclay cards? instructor). Lecture 9 Thurs., May 15 7:00pm-9:30pm Baby, if you’ve ever wondered, wondered what com­ Lecture 10 Sun., May 18 10:00am-12:30pm SMALL GROUP Essential component of N ot a com ponent o f the mercials would be like—without the censors that prohi­ WORK the LSAT course. course. Lecture 11 TUes., M ay 20 7:00pm-9:30pm bit advertisements for tangible sex products, opting in­ Lecture 12 Thurs., May 22 7:00pm-9:30pm stead to show Arnold Schwarzenegger blowing some­ EXTRA T h e Princeton Review it the A few more real LSATs, Test 2 Sun., May 25 9:00am-1:30pm o n ly course that licenses the some fake teats that Kaplan one’s brains out, then perhaps a trip to the Isla Vista MATERIAL J J Lecture 13 Tues., May 27 7:00pm-9:30pm 14 m ost recent LSATs and w rote, and others “available Theater on Friday night may give you an idea. gives them to each student at the Kaplan library.” Lecture 14 Thurs., May 29 7:00pm-9:30pm All the ads America thinks are too racy for network in one big book. Test 3 Sun., June 1 9:00am-1:30pm television can be seen in the film World's Best Commer­ NUMBER OF 2 2 10 Lecture 15 Tues., June 3 7:00pm-9:30pm cials 1996. Well, this isn’t completely true. There are SESSIONS Lecture 16 Thurs., June 5 7:00pm-9:30pm commercials from companies such as Little Caesars and Test 4 Sun., June B 9:00am-1:30pm Macintosh, but this film certainly manages to squeeze in For more info., please call us at (800) 2-REVIEW or reach us online at wvwv.review.com Lecture 17 Tues., June 10 7:00pm-9:30pm quite a number of 30-second sexually suggestive The Princeton Review Is not a liiHated with Princeton University orLSAS. Lecture 18 Thurs., June 12 7:00pm-9:30pm commercials. In a little over an hour, prepare to be amused, titil­ lated, touched and revolted by the international images of capitalism and free-market economies. See Roan Atk­ inson, AKA Mr. Bean, as a British secret agent who seems to find himself in predicaments that only his Barc­ lay card carrying protégé can handle. Watch a cancer- ridden man on his death bed sing “Happy Birthday” through a hole in his suprasternal notch. Or watch Bri­ tain’s finest soccer players, including Eric Cantona of Manchester United, score a goal against Satan’s finest bats out of hell. With each advertisement lasting no more than 60 sec­ onds, your attention span is unlikely to go awry. In fact you may even be left begging for more. World’s Best Commercials 1996will screen at 7 and 9 p.m. in Isla Vista Theater. Student admission is $5 and general admission is $6. —Little B

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Self-Service Car Washing At Its Finest 527 Anacapa St. (at Cota) Santa Barbara • Open 24 Hours Daily Daily Nexus Thursday, April 24,1997 7 A

iiiuiuiuiuiiuiiiuauiiuuuiui SANTA MARIA'S ONLY ADULT CABARET I Cut lo the Chase SPEARMINT RHINO ADULT CABARET Can a movie with lines 505 S. Broadway like, “She got filled out like Cronin Santa Maria an application,” really £*"«**# 349-9535 have heart? 11 K)0am-2:00am Not usually. But Chas­ 7 DAYS A WEEK ing Amy, the latest offer­ ALWAYS HIRING DANCERS ing from Clerks writer and director Kevin Smith, THE LEADER IN ADULT CABARETS! pulls it off — effortlessly T r a n m t r a TTW Tm r a m m t TTTTTTY blending Smith’s obtuse brand of juvenile humor with a surprisingly mature Unite in the take on the complex na­ celebration of ture of love, friendship and homophobia. diversity at Ben Affleck and Jason UCSB with Lee play comic book ar­ tists Holden McNeil and performances Banky Edwards, respec­ and information tively. Chasing Amy tells tables from a the tale of Holden’s pur­ suit of fellow cartoonist variety of Alyssa Jones (Joey Lauren ¡Chasing Any: Everyone will be moved cultural Adams). rampant. everyone will be moved, as Complications arise Some viewers may share Holden and Alyssa slip- organizations. when Holden learns that the pain of Holden’s insat­ slide over the rocky land­ Alyssa is a lesbian. Friend­ iable desires. Some may scape of love in the ’90s — Enjoy food (I3BQ), entertainment, and music provided by DJ Lion ships deteriorate. Adoles­ recognize the impossibil­ and come face to face with cent humor abounds. Mis- ity of amending the scars the inevitable. SATURDAY, April 26 • 12 noon-4pm understanding runs of betrayal. However, —Chucky L. McGuilicutti Jameson Field at Santa Ynez Apartments Brought to you fcy RC staff, SSACC. Michael Young. A.5. Finance Board, and CAB

Despite the film’s short 87-minute du­ boyfriend to find the truth behind the let­ ration, The Daytrippers is able to create ter. And so begins the day trip, which The Multicultural Center Presents not only an intimate portrait of each of its sends a suburban family into the heart of main characters, but of everyone they Manhattan in its rusty old station wagon. meet during their day trip. During the course of the day they en­ The Daytrippers gives the audience counter the gamut of personalities; from greater insight into what motivates each Louis’ sex-obsessed co-workers to a pair character in five minutes than many films of old maids arguing over their right to KITKA do in their entirety. This makes it an en­ their mother’s property once she dies, j W OMEN'S gaging and absorbing work that is wittily The comedy is subtle and delicate, not and subtly depicted in all its comic and incorporating laugh-out-loud slapstick, dramatic moments. but rather, sly observations and neat one- V O C A L ENSEMBLE The plot of this film is simple. When liners. The acting is crisp and sharp on all “Their power and energy is exotic and Eliza D’Amico (Hope Davis) finds a love sides. In a film that relies on detailed ob­ exhilarating...showcasing the beauty letter to her husband, Louis (Stanley servation of character, nothing is lost to and vitality of female voices. ” Tucci), on her bedroom floor, she sets off poor performance. with her parents, her ¿ister and hersister’s —William Banks — Heidi Zemach, National Public Radio Join us for this amazing performance of vocal music sparked by the rich traditions of Eastern GRAND OPENING European women’s singing. NEVER A (OVER WITH COLLEGE I.D. SATURdAy, ApRil 26 at 8 pM UCSB M uItICuIturaI C enter Theater For tickets, call the AS Ticket Office at 893-2064. For other information, call the MCC at 893-8411. GREAT FOOD CHEAP DRINKS POOL TABLES G A M E R O O M OUTDOOR PATIO DAMCING

EVERY THURSDAY COLLEGE NIGHT 7 5 cent DRINK NIGHT 810PM DJ AND PANCINO AFTER 9PM NO COVER CHARGE ALL NIGHT ZSTH Ul/E MUSIC WITHAGAINST TIC GRAIN $1 MUK SPECIALS ALL RIGHT DJ AND DANCING AFTER BANDI EVERY SATURDAY NIGHT Sunday; April 27/ 7 P M SI D R IN K S 8 -1 0 P M UCSB's Isla Vista Theater DJAND DANCING AFTER 9PM James Dean stars in this film about an alienated, lonely teenager who nobody FREE PARKING LOT #4 1117 STATE STREET understands. Don’t miss your chance to see the original wide-screen version. ON CHAPALA ST. SANTA BARBARA Film Society Members: $3 General Admission: $5 PH 564-1889 loin the film society and get discounts on ticket prices, coffee, videos, cd’s, and more! 8 A Thursday, April 24,1997 Daily Nexus PICK % THE WEEK The Simpsons t Songs in the Key of Springfield t Rhino The Simpsons is arguably the most intelligent televi­ side of life in their songs, Although they have This 15-song compila­ sion series on the airtight now with its postmodern re­ peering into those shady made the dreaded switch tion from the UK-based ferences to western croluation and pop culture.To pay comers that we are all, if to a sucky major label, Ben Deconstruction label (re­ homage to the creative cartoon show, Artsweek the truth be spoken, quite Folds Five is still cool ’cos leased domestically by gathered those experts of satire, the Daily Nexus illus­ fascinated with. they don’t sound like a RCA) is basically a taste of trate rs-?*Ryan, Vince, Kevin andKazu— to dissect the Matthew Sweet / Blue On this release the band what lets-get-drunk-and- intricacies of the eagerly awaited collection of songs Sky On Mars / Zoo has glammed up their see-how-many-people- and dialogue from the caiman;:;»-:-.. sounds a bit. Bowie has al­ we-can-get-off-with-on- If there were a category ways been a big influence, the-dance-floor student Artsweek: The first musical track after the classic for bubble-gum alterna­ and in this case, “Major dance venues in Britain "Simpsons* Theme** is aTHe Stonecutters* Song.” tive, Matthew Sweet Tom” has definitely been are playing on any regular What did you think of Hi would be doing his best to in touch. There’s some night. There’s Harmonix, Vince: It's like a classic commentary on religious straddle that genre’s line veiy spangly guitar work who does an interesting groupS^|£] without crossing it. Actu­ going on. And very nice at techno take on “Where the What about the lyric, “Who made Steve Gutten- ally, he’s done that for that. Streets Have No Name,” berg a star?” | most of his career, and he’s corporate band (at least (but they call it “Land­ Ryan: Steve was the same man in every single frea­ had the misfortune to have not one from the (MalTer- slide” probably to get ar­ kin’ movie. mainstream pop catch up natiVe decade.) ound publishing prob­ Kazu: What’s this? Is this the Steve Guttenberg with and almost eclipse his Actually, the trio’s lems) thatyou can bee-bop panel more recent albums. The sound is a snotty/loving your little head to, if you’re What about Apu*s *Who Needs the Qwik-E- o nly thing that kept his last appropriation of the late sober enough to recognize Marf?” all-star number? | f S I three efforts from becom­ ’70s piano rock by boom­ Kevin: The music doesn’t, really grab me. I like the ing monster alt-radio hits ers Billy Joel and Elton acoustic version of Apu’s song, 1 think. was the fact that modem John, which, much to the Ryan: You want Apu Unplugged? ‘ 4 J rock radio wasn’t too sure band’s credit, avoids being Kevin: Apu heeds to hepti^MTV, dude.|^ it wanted to make him a corny (because acknow­ Is this an accurate depiction of a convenience store hit. ledging that you’re preten­ owner? Blue Sky On Mars has a sharp social critic, and the tious makes you less so). Vince: I don’t think it’s a malicious type of usage. few really great pop sin­ wry humor of his lyrics The album switches They, use the stereotype, but they make fun of the peo­ gles, like “Where You Get deal with various aspects from funny diatribes ple who use the stereotype.,. , of our generation’s Rave it. There’s also the micro- Love” and “Hollow.” And (“Give me my money back, wave cheddar-laden ver­ Kazu: There’s something about them being yellow, then there are songs like New World. “Filmstar” you bitcht” goes the sion of DJ Duke’s Master- too ... me being Asian, y’know ... i don't know. “Until You Break,” which and “Star Crazy” make ir­ chorus for “Song for the Ryan: And they only have four fingers, too. bore quickly and don’t onic comments about Blaster Mix of “Girls And Dumped”) to sweet, senti­ Boys.” Did we all enjoy theKamp Krusty, happiest-place- even grow on the listener. both sides of media obses­ mental ballads (“Brick,” on-earth dialogue?^ ' It would be great if sion, while “Beautiful “Be As One,” and “Love “Selfless, Cold and Com­ Me Now,” are tracks that Ryan: That was funny, but sometimes the dialogue Matthew Sweet became a Ones” mocks the cooler- posed”) and retains a will certainly teach you a gets, in the way, Like.ydu try to get to thenext track, but mega-star, but if he did it than-thou, 20-something sense of genuinity uncom­ little about peace and lo­ you have to get through all that talking, so you’re because of Blue Sky On clubbers and their obses­ mon in most modem pop vin’ (’cos the world needs screwed. I Mars, his new success sion with those happy music. more of it) I Kevin: 1 don’t think I would want to hear the same would be very empty. little pills. —ERIKSOLO jokes over and over. It would be like listening to Vince —Keir DuBois There are some proper Clever lyrics. Great tracks by Dave Clarke, tell the" same iokes over and over. music and a really good- Various Artists / Decon­ The London Suede / struction Presents / RCA Monkey Mafia and a Lion looking album cover. Rock track mixed by The Coming Up / Columbia What more could you Techno enthusiasts on Chemical Brothers, but in want? order to hear these three Coming Up is perfect —Kate Lauer the cusp of electrónica London Suede. Right from probably had all the tracks delights there is a lot of the start Brett Anderson’s Ben Folds Five / What­ on this cd about two years Velveeta to go through. band explores the seedy ever and Ever Amen / 550 ago. —Cooper L.

LOCKHEED MARTIN WESTERN DEVELOPMENT LABORATORIES

Come to our Information Session on April 24,1997 from 3:00pm-5:00pm at the University Center in the Santa Barbara Harbor Room

L /ockheed Martin Western Development Laboratories is a leader in cutting-edge technology and large systems integration for nationally important commercial and non-commercial applications. The company addresses wide band satellite ground communications, digital signal processing, tactical communications, network management, telecommu­ nications and software development.

We are looking for the following Bachelors, Masters and Ph.D.s for our San Jose, CA location:

• Hardware Engineers for analog and high speed digital systems development.

• Software Engineers for real time, information systems.

• Systems Engineers for advanced communications and telecommunications systems.

Applicants selected may be subject to a security investigation in order to be eligible for access to classified information. You must be immediately eligible to work for Lockheed Martin Western Development Laboratories without sponsorship.

Working within Lockheed Martin WDLs matrix organization gives you the opportunity to engage in a variety of exciting projects or remain devoted to a favorite. We offer a competitive salary and benefits package and a highly attractive relocation package.

See our home page on the World Wide Web: http://www.lmwdl.com

Sign up for On-Campus Interviews on April 25,1997 in the Counseling and Career Services Office!!