Those Feldazera Were Themselves Mostly Deported Rxwslana Or Their Descendants and the HKVD Had the Sane Authority Over Them As Over Us

lhk

Those Feldazera were themselves mostly deported rxwslana or their descendants and the HKVD had the sane authority over them as over us.

For bathing, the russlans used to install the so-called "Ban|a". It

Is a small room where water is poured over heated stones and the hot steam

is generated like in a turkish hath. Besides, there are wooden buckets which can be filled with hot water. The russlans have the habit that they go to the Bantta "en Famllle" , with wife and children and they bathe to* gather, formally they take along a second set of shirts and underwear and while bathing, the dirty laundry la washed on the spot in those wooden buckets.

It is a bathroom and a laundry at the sane time. Going home, they put on their new laundry, carrying the washed set home for drying.

In those Bantfas one has to be very careful because lice can be easily

acquired. It was unavoidable to come in contact with the dirty laundry or

clothes of the ox undressed people hanging all over, specially in this crow-

ded small room cloudy with steam. There were plenty of Hog among our people

but fortunately we had no typhoid, in this part of the country.

In two places where I was moved around there were no Feldszers at all.

The next one was some four miles away. Bare was a difficult problem. When

someone didn't feel well, or if ke he had temperature, he could not be released

for work unless he had a "Spravka". In order to get this Spravka, he had to go

rain or snow, to see the Feldszer, walking those four miles. How it happened

that the man got worse marching back and forth eight miles, but It also happened

that in this strange climate, he arrived there without any temperature at all.

Bare was where the trouble started. This happened to a lady from our barrack

the wife of a steel merchant, Herself /MS in Chemistry. She had a hard time to

persuade the Feldszer to give her the Spravka for this day. If not, she would

have been punished under the provision of the labor law because she would be

considered "loafing". 1^5

, iteee I* pie Ambulatorium wkeve not only Feldszere weee employed, but also regular physicians with MD degrees, (mostly women). hSaa higher authority /fe»y and its recommendation was respected by the MKYD. The Doctors there were mostly deported themselves since many years and had to stay and work here.

They had more understanding and compassion for us.

BEING A PATIENT ( My Own Experience)

After ten months working in the woods, I was at the end of my strength.

My legs became swollen and I felt very weak. I got permission to visit the

Ambulatotium. Here I had one of those experiences which will remain with me through my whole life. A little school girl was in front of me. A woman opened a little window in the wall from the waiting room and from the conversation I found out that the little girl didn't go to school this day and she needed a "Spravka" for the school principal. Children of deportees need a

Spravka while absent from school, like a worker while absent from work. The woman asked her while filling out a form for her name, age and then came the question: it.Tfolna 111 Nlewolna n.? It means '' free or not free.'' The girl answered with a loud melodic voice so characteristic for the russlan language: "Nlewolna"

(not free). At first I didn't understand the question. It was funny to ask a little school girl about her status, but it dawned on me that she wae asking the girl whether she was a free citizen or a slave, and the girl knowing already, that she was born with a stigma answered, with a full mature earnestness that she is NOT Free, it means i.e., destined to be a slave. I got heart sick after I realized the meaning of this strange dialogue in a matter of course tone. It flashed through my mind what my children have to expect in a similar case and how they would take it. Ifc6

I slowly recovered from the shock end I was asked the same question.

I had no trouble In answering them properly.

The elderly woman doctor after examining me carefully, started a conversation vith me inquiring about ray past and background. She was very syapathetio and sighed when she heard that I was working as a wood cutter.

She asked me to oome back In the evening when she would present my case to her superior. Around 8 o'clock In the evening the other woman doctor heard her reporting my case and I was told to wait outside. After a short consultation, I was called in and presented with a "Spravka" that I am relieved from manual work for the next four weeks. Ify gratitude to those two kind ladies and my Joy was immense. It was worthwhile to walk back at night those four miles through the woods knowing that I have not to march the next day in the morning hours to the woods.

When I presented the next day before work, the Spravka to our HOT) deputy, he was outraged and pale with anger.

It happened before that some man or woman from our group was sent back to the Foslolok where our families lived because of illness or inability to work. Bow I was eligible to Join my family but the IKVD deputy didn't let me go. It took nearly two weeks of consultation between our HKTO deputy and the HKYD man where my family lived and the higher Bayon's Commander, until

I was allowed to start my way "home".

nsinrt^TtfesffliimKnaaJOTBgattK.

I have to recall a very characteristic Incident in connection with my temporary release from work, Hy wife after she learned from my letter that

I became sick, and that I was free from work for the next four weeks, tried

also from her end, to get permission from the local HKVD deputy that I 11*7

might Join my family. A good friend of ours who spoke fluently russian

wont to him In behalf of my wife and tried to convince him that I will

recover faster being cared for by my wife and besides pointing to the HKVD'a

deputy's wife present at thie oonversatlon, my friend told them, "You see

you are together with your wife, why shouldn't he be together with his?" At

this moment the HKVD deputy turned to hie wife and said, I spit at my wife, and ir f/ the being together is not at all necessary.

Being finally told that I could join my family, didn't mean that I

was provided with some means of transportation. As far as he was concerned

I simply could walk for some 70 miles, after being released from work be-

cause I was found sick. And so I went. It was on the 9th of April, 19^1* (1

remember this date because it took me four days to march and I arrived Just

on my wife's birthday.) There was deep snow still around. I was only shown

the general direction. Bow and then some sled appeared and took me along

for some distance. Sometimes it was onlyufer a while because he took a side

pass from the main road. Sometimes I was luckier because he went to the next

village In my direction. It was a sort of hitch-hiking but not like here

where every few seconds a car passes by. I Just kept walking. I was quite

scared when my way led me between woods and I had not seen a living soul

for hours. Specially when it became dark anithere was not trace of human

life In sight. And so I had to keep walking, perspiring from a cold sweat

until from the far distance, a dim light from some little window greeted me.

It was like finding water In a desert.

For the night, I knocked at the door of some hut and was always allowed

to stay there or rather to sit around the stove during the night. The

Russian peasants sleep during the winter mostly on top of a huge stove made

from brick and mud which keeps warm being heated all day long. Spending U*8

several nights with russian families In their homes gave me a chance to see how they lived, to talk to then and to hear their life stories. Of course they didn't fail to notice that I am a stranger, and eo they wanted also to know about the life 1A the West and the reason of my being here.

Some of them didn't even know that there was a world war going on. They were friendly and hospitable people but they didn't have anything to offer me because they were very poor themselves. Even for money they couldn't

sell anything. I had therefore to economize on my bread which I took along with me. Of course there was nothing to buy anywhere.

(Those experiences here and all my others while working an& living aogether with the ruasians, \aade it possible for me to descrlve In a separate chapter from my first ham1 knowledge, my impressions on the hundreds of

ruaeians I met there.)

When I finally on my fourth day of wandering around noon time saw from

the far distance, the hill with the hute/ or Posiolok, I had the feeling of

coming home. It was strange but genuine, the feeling of belonging to the

wilderness because here in one of those huts, was living my little family

who shared my sorrows and the little Joy we were about to live through. Z

couldn't compare it with any emotion and feeling experienced In my whole life.

Zt was like coming from another world.

Every soul approaching the Posiolok from the outside was Immediately

noticed from the hill. People came running to see who was coming. They

hardly recognised me in my outfit. But immediately, like a forest fire, tbs

news spread out through the Posiolok, that I had arrived from the woods until

it reached my family. People were following me all the way axmocag along and

entered our hut "enmaese" together with me(inquiring about their dear ones.

It was like coming from a battle front, reporting about the others still left

behind. I bad no birthday gift for my wife, and there was no birthday cake either but it was one of the happiest birthdays ever. Dt9

OUR WAGES AHD OUR PAYMENT

Before coming to Russia, people thought that money vould be no problem there. Everybody le working, the State provides everything and BO logically nobody should have any financial worries.

In fact some people who had money, did not take it along during the deportation because according to the general idea about Soviet Russia, they thought that they vould not need money here. But it turned out differently as everything else. Money was not only a problem here like in every capital"

1st state and even more so, and here is why.

'» if I have mentioned money so often, buying for money etc. So, it is quite natural to ask, where did the money come from? Ve had to pay for everything, for our bread, our food and whatever else was sold to us. At the same time were paid for our accomplished work. What were our wages and how did we get paid?

Nobody told us and nobody knew how much ve get paid, Ve were working In groups i.e., it means in Brigades consisting of three to six persons and our Sesiatnik made twice a month ( the fifteenth and at the end of the month) an account of the work of the whole group in cubic meters and rubele and the sum was divided amongst the workers of the group, on the basis of some mysterious algebra which nobody could fathom. And it so happened, that between two men doing the same work (for instance both were cleaning the trees) one received more than the other. Tou ask the Deslataik for an explanation and he referred you to the office. Tou went to the office and the accountant was always busy so he asked you to come some other time, of course after work in the evening. After several more attempts, most of the time you gave up. But If someone was persistent and came again and again, he was finally thrown out from the office with a few Juicy four letter curses of which the 150

the language la vary rich in addition, and there was still no explanation.

Bow much did we get paldf The highest wages I have earned during one and a half years were 31 rubels for fourteen days work in the woods, but moat of the time wy wagea were not higher than 12 rubels for fourteen days work, (official exchange rate is 5.20 rubele for one dollar.) Bow were the wages paid? Tie Desiatnik started working on those mystical figures on the

16th. Be worked on them at night after work because the day he spent with us In the woods. It was hard work for then considering the complicated figur-

ing and that some of them had troubles with their "5 B's" so it took than at least three nights. Then the list went for checking to the office for another two to throe days. Than the list was sent to the State bank to the nearest town. It happened quite frequently that there was no money in the bank and the list had to wait. Finally the list cane back with the money.

So It wasn't before the 2Hh or 25th that we were called in , in the evening after work, to get our wages. Ve stood in line, of course the office was In a hurry, ve had to sign the list, take the money and get out. Ve saw that there were deductions for the HKVD as oaanalseion, dues to the Trade Union

(representing us abroad) and caste others but we actually never received a de-

tailed accounting. Another thing...our wages were never of course in round

figures in rubels but they were always some "KopekJ" (pennies), for instance,

twelve rubels ^5 Kopekl. Those kj Sopekl were never paid to us even If we

signed for them. Who got them? They disappeared somewhere.

I remember once during a rest period, recalling the old tines, I told

our Desiatnik I was friendly with, how In the capitalist countries, a worker

was paid. There was an envelope X told him with all the figures written

outside, with all the details concerning all deaucticiB and inside the sum

arrived at could be found to the last penny. Should it happen that there

was an error or the worker didn't understand the figuring, he could immediately 151

walk into the office and ask for a checking ox* explanation. I surety told him the truth* The Desiatnik listened patiently to my story and hie answer was, "I as your friend, ad-vise you not to tell this to anybody else* because you will be aooused of contra-revolutionary propaganda."

Bow could we support our families or even live on such earnlngB which were not even enough to pay for our daily bread? Of course we couldn't.

Sons people had seme money which they brought with them, some sold to the russians whatever they could from their belongings (the most precious thing was of course a watch). Some others received packages or money from their relatives ra>M«am who were still under the russian occupation and there was o£ ectsrae a postal cotomunlcation still operating even with very long delays*

And so working hard under the most difficult conditions we practically lived on what we could receive outside our work and earnings.

Ve complained at every occasion about those earnings which would have led us under normal conditions to a tragic end. Some were so bitter and so desperate that they ridiculed the officials during a meeting and asked them whether this Is supposed to be the "worker's paradise1* (this meeting was abruptly bricen up*) So the Bussians tried to boost up our work by introduo- ing the method of the Stachanov movement. Some group would have to work out the full "norm" or even more than that and they were sure that the others would follow suit. Actually one group suddenly came up with a very huge output and this was a challenge to the others. However, it cane out later tfeat this was done by some conlving with the Sesiatnlk by a very simple trick* The sane output was taken over several times and hence, the Stachanov achieve- ment, (some people think that this devloe is used all over). Of course this bullying stopped with no practical results and our wages were low as ever. 152

LIFE m THE KJSIOLOK

Z mentioned before that I was taken away from my family. % family and many other* sharing the same fate were left by themselves in the plaee where we arrived first and which I described previously.

Bow did they live there! What I am about to tell you I know from my wife 's letters which X received once or twice a week, and I also know it from my own experience because I stayed with thorn for a while after I was

sent back at the end of a ten month separation. I and the others left their families in the most deplorable conditions at the end of July, 19to), in the

wilderness, cold Poslolok Hiariz. There might have been some 200 families^

two to three families living In one hut.

The huts were completely unprotected log cabins with no windows or

doers, the water was some half a mile away and had to be carried from a nearby brook in pots or buckets. The store provided at the beginning bread only.

There was no soup kitchen or Stolowka as in some other places and every family

had to organise their meals with its own means and Ingenuity. There was an

BK¥D deputy with his wife and there was the "Bavchov" we could call him the

Cevil Administrator of the settlement. The only thing on the credit side

was the fact that the contact with the outside world wae already established

and the good old postman used to corns once or twice a week to bring and to

pick up some mail. The morale of the whole population was pretty low because cf the un-

certainty concerning us who were taken away not knowing whether and when we

would ever be reunited. I mentioned before that the Dentist was amongst us, and he was retained

at the Poslolok and was put in charge of the medical care of the whole popula-

tion. This decent and fine gentleman had the best intentions but he could do 153

fvxgr little. In the first plaoo he never practiced medicine before, secondly, he had no instruments and no medicines. In fact, he had not even dental instruments with him because he esoaped from his native town from the Hazls with hare hands and didn't start practicing dentistry in his place of refuge when he was deported. It happened once that my wife who suffered from a terrific toothache had to have her tooth extracted. The dentist did it, using no anaesthetic because there was none, with a pair of ordinary pliers which he borrowed from a shoemaker, (incidentally, the dentist and his family becaae our good friends. They left two years ago from Poland and settled down in Israel.)

The only medicines available were those which my wife brought along and which of course shared with everyone who needed them, (in the dentist's own family was later a case of very heavy Palagra. Be was cured with vitamin pills which my wife was saving for very serious conditions.)

As a rule the climate with eight months of cold and four months of warm weather was rather favorable and no serious or epidemic sickness occurred at this time. Several death cases were of natural causes and could have happened anywhere. The women suffered relatively more than the men. A change in climate, mental depression and lack oi proper nourishment caused distur- bances in their monthly raemtstrations which in turn effected badly their nervous sgdancx system. Of course nobody could even dream of those new medicines like Hormones, so the suffering was going on.

The families in the Poaiolok tried very hard to adjust themselves to those abnormal conditions. In the first place their huts had to be repaired in order to make them inhabitable, especially considering the approaching severe winter. The Russians from the nearby Kolohoz came over in their spare time and made doors and windows and covered the lower part of the cabin with mud to provide some sort of insulation. 15^

Among our people a father and eon turned out to be carpenters by

profession and they made from the discarded wooden planks* some sort of

a bed and table and a bench. One nan a shoemaker In the past, organised

with a fev helpers, a shoe-repalr-cooperative and patched up the worn out

shoes.

Late In Fall a russian girl arrived also deported and she organized a

one-room, one-class school for children where rues Ian reading and writing

was taught. It was very primitive but It kept the children for the part of

the day, busy.

Another man arrived In the capaolty of a fireman (Pozarnik) but in

fact he was a helper of the NKVD deputy. Of course the Posiolok was under

constant vigilance of the KKTO deputy. 2h the beginning he was called

Tovarysc Commandant". He was a tall young man In the late twenties with

characteristic Slavic features, broad across the cheek, with inquisitive eyes*

He seldom smiled was rather sarcastic and very suspicious. Asa devoted com-

munist he looked with contempt at us whom he considered as enemies of the

Soviet System. Be and his family Inhabited a hut with windows on all four

sides at the base of our hill and from here he could overlook the whole settle-

ment. 3n a way he was a guard at the prison gate. Nothing could be done

without his knowledge and nobody could leave even for a short while without

his written permission. Be was busy running around the whole day always look-

ing for something. Be could enter any room at any time for no reason whatever, and his helper did the same thing. Even late in the evening, at any odd hours, pretending that this Is for fire safety, checking the brick stoves heated with wood. Bis had here besides his Informers, specially one women the wife of a former bank exeoutlve. Her husband a quiet fellow and her seventeen year old

son, were working with me In the woods and she was left behind with a younger

son; A sort of a frustrated person, quarreling constantly with her own family 155

mean by nature, -volunteered in reporting. Of course It didn't take long when her evening visits to the Commander's hone became cannon knowledge* So

people avoided her as host they could. Hot having enough stories to tell, she

stopped even children somewhere around their homes, inquiring what Is going

on at hone, what they had to eat and who came for a visit. Our children were

warned and next time when she started her usual Inquiry, the children kept

their mouths tight, like having a mouth full of water. Bow she wanted to know

whether they were instructed not to answer? Because this might have been

eventually interesting news for the Coranandant too. But our children were Just

"Bam". The woman received her reward for Informing. Hhen once a single

enamel wash basin arrived at the store - according to the five year plan - she

was given permission to buy it.

The Commander was apparently very much interested to know who Is visit-

ing whom, and what Is their topic of conversation? This was also the reason

for hie frequent visits. On some occasions he was even looking under the

bed maybe somebody was hiding there. Be tried to keep everybody busy and he kept people under constant threat that he was going to send them to the woods.

During the Jewish high holidays, one of the gentleman planned and organ-

ized a kind of religious service In the hut of one very pious old man. The

Canoander informed about this event by hie spies, appeared with his helper

at the meeting place, angry and furious and chased away everybody. The ser-

vice nevertheless took place at a later hour at another place.

He was in charge not only of our Posiolek but also of the Russians who

lived around us and of many labor camps In our vicinity. 3h this capacity he often went away with his horse and buggy on two wheels or on a sled in the winter. It was always a sort of holiday whenever he left. Everybody was breathing easier. Altogether he led a miserable life according to our standard.

He had his uniform, a shirt or two and a pair of high boots and that was all.

He had more bread, maybe some meat to eat and possibly some Todka to drink. -156

But certainly no luxuries. He had no friends because he was feared and hated by everybody and had to carry a pistol day and night. Nobody In a free country would voluntary accept this sort of position and such a life.

This nan was very eager not only to guard but also to educate us. The russiana are very quick in criticising everything that Is not according to their standard as not "cultural". Once he found In our hut my wife while she was washing our children with soap and water, the only luxury she could afford. He rebuked her for it, saying, that It Is not "Kulturno" because this should be done in the common baths called Banjga which was open once in a tine.

I mentioned before that in our Poslolok was no Stolowka. The stores sold only bread and on scene rare occasions, one or two pounds per person of barley, coffee substitute and a few ounces of hard candy. It would be impossible to live on those rations. So people had to look for other sources of supply. A contact was established with a neighboring russlan settlement and they used to bring stolenly some potatoes, milk or even eggs as an exchange for some commodities like sheets, towels, shirts, cotton or woolen material, etc. Later on some people were permitted to go themselves to the russlan settlement and to bring the products as a result of bartering.

Another big help were the packages sent by the families living In the russlan occupied territory. Fat, sugar, canned meat, flour, cocoa, medicine and some oloth, Items not available here at all, came In those small coveted packages. After several months even packages from relatives in the U.S. arrived. Those American packages caused a tremendous sensation after they arrived and everybody came looking at them. The Commander himself and ordered that those packages had to be opened in hie presence. Those American goods in their beautiful cans, whloh we take here for granted, were the object of general admiration and envy. They contained Items In every day use here even by the poorest family, like ground coffee, cocoa, sugar, evaporated milk, spry, bis- quite but there they were the symbol of the highest luxury. A food package was a dream whloh might come true and was the topic of dally conversation. 157

Love, family bonds and friendship wore measured by the amount and qualtly of the shipped packages. (I am sura that even the moot fashionable woman having a choice between a Russian Mink Coat exported from here to the U.S. and an American paakage would prefer the latter.) Of course not all were lucky enough to have relatives who could send packages. Those families suffered and some didn't have even enough money to buy the bread rations.

Fortunately there was a fine gentleman amongst the families left behind who tried to solve this problem to some extent, (he was the same gentleman who traveled with us in the same car with his wife and young son and became reunited with his elder son and daughter-ln-lav during our Journey. They were deported In the same train without knowing one of the other. My family shared the same hut with this family at the Poslolok.)

He organized a clandestine charity committee and collected personally monthly little dues from every family who could afford to pay. This raaaaax money he distributed then amongst the needy in a discreet way, in order not to embarrass them. Amongst them were people who used to be benefactors themselves before the war* This charity action had to be kept secret because charity does not exist in Bussia and the Commander could accuse the man of some illegal contra-revolutionary activities and cause him troubles, (incidentally this fine gentleman was Imprisoned two years later and spent one year in Jail.)

What did the daily life of our families In the Poslolok look life?

With the cold season approaohing, quite a lot of time was spent to keep the hut warm. Wood had to be brought in, sawed and chopped. Somebody had to watch the store and to find out whether and when something would be sold and eventually to line up In the queue. My boys were very helpful to my wife in those tasks. My wife had always to economise and to leave some bread from the day before because you could never tell mhen the bread will come the next day. TJhis left over bread vas normally the breakfast. Then she had to 158

think of preparing acne usual for noon (it hardly could be called lunch) either from a package or from what she oould get locally. In the evening was the same problem. In the hours la between people from two or three families ve became friendly with, used to drop In for a talk. The tople of those conversations was always the same. Memories from the past and prophecies for our future. There was no radio and no newspapers but somehow there were a&m always rumors that somebody picked up somewhere. Of course

there was always wishful thinking in those rumors which spread out with a

lightening Telocity. Some rumors were really bad; that we are not going to

stay here but will be moved farther north where we will be out off from every

outside contact all together.

From letters from our relatives we could read between the lines that the Hazi-Soviet friendship is not pure gold and something big is in the offing,

that big army units are moved to the border* It was gastg good in times like

that to have around us, the fine gentleman I mentioned before, a very pious her man and another lady respected by everybody for/high intellect and good heart.

Her radiating optimism was a source of spiritual strength and consolation dur-

ing those days. Hfy boys when free from their daily chores, like chopping wood, bringing

water and standing in line for bread, used to play around the hut with a boy

of our neighborly friends and a little stray dog they befriended.

Otherwise they were sitting around listening to the problems , worries

and discussions of the older folks. As a result the look in their eyes be-

came too serious for their age . They realised that they are part of the life

which was not promised to them in their early years.

Life was otherwise drab, with no relaxation whatever. The days became to very short and the nights lasting from four in the ajftsjumiBum afternoon XK 8 ooj-ock in the morning seemed like an eternity • The only excitement was caused when mail 159

f *ko arrived .then everybody/was lucky enough, to receive some letter, was sitting for hours to rood and reread every word . You looked sometimes through the little hole of a window and you saw sometimes somebody rushing by, covered with all sorts of clothes and hard to recognize. And the wind was blowing with strange melodies and the snow was falling with no end* The old sail nan - our Djedushka - took a liking to our family and to the family we were friendly with. Late In the evening he used to come sometimes and brought along some milk or same eggs which he didn't want to sell to anybody else. Then he sat with our family , sipping tea and recalling stories from his past better life. Once ay wife offered him a cup of cocoa which came la a package he brought the same day* la sasdtid couldn't get over this heavenly test drink and enjoyed every drop of it* His blue eyes were shining from his gray head, I guess people who ate Manna In the tamsxk dessert la biblical times might have had the same feeling* THE K08SIABB MAY OF LOT It might be Interesting to describe the way of living and thinking of the Russians, I have been working with. This description I am giving to you is based on many conversations with them while working with them, on long observation, visiting their homes and living with them for a long time practically in one room. la the beginning while working in the first Uozaetok we were housed in separate barracks* Later on, when I was moved from one Lesopunkt to another I lived together with the russlans. The russiaa authorities did not bother any more with keeping us or even the sexes separate. 2h one place some twenty people, we and the russlans, from both sexes, with some couples among us were a living for nearly three months In one little barrack, /tit bigger than a normal living room, with a smoking iron stove in the middle used for heating and cook- lag. 160

At first their story. Host of them were deported as Kulaks in the middle

1920* 8 mostly from Kuban In the North $aukasus. However, they came over here under different and I would "venture to add, even under more dlffloult

conditions than ve were brought over. It is true, that they were peasants

used to manual labor, but they were brought over here at winter time and as

they call it, Oaa&jx "Pod Tolkoy" it means verbally "tkder the Pine Tree".

In other words, coming from a country with a very mild climate, they and with

their families were unloaded in the winter time direct into the woods, with

no huts or protection from the severe cold whatever. They were provided with

same bread and tools and were told to build here themselves their home*. They

died here by the hundreds daily from frost and starvation. The only thing they could do, under those conditions was to dig holes and pits under ground and seme survived so the first winter. They were told that as enemies of their regime, who resisted collectivization of their land, they were sent over here

for ten years, for reeducation. And after serving a sentence they will go back to their homes. When we met them they were already fifteen years here.

They told me they wouldn't oare to go back even if the KK?1) would allow them.

They would not get back their property anyway and the economical conditions are here the same as all over. So why go through all those troubles. Besides they would find there only hostile strangers who moved into their places after they were deported.

It took them many years to adjust themselves In spite of the fact that who they themselves were peasants and for thiscreasons seme of them/were more reasonable and more intelligent, looked with scuae sort of pity at us. Of course there was already a second generation coming up who never knew anything better and those were rather satisfied that people from great cities came to share their plight. 161

Only a few of than after very hard work, reached the position of Deslatnik t H supervising oar work or oven the position of m XaAs. t Baosalnik, (technical director). Most of them even after so many years had to perform the same doing kind of work tJettaeian wood outting as we did or they were working as horse- drivers, collecting the out timber in the woods* Of course after so many years they learned their trade and all the tricks and ropes and earned more money. But it took them many years, and even then, they never got used to it and hated their jobs.

Seme of them even after being deported had some strange experiences.

One of the Desiatnik who was a textile merchant in his village, before his

deportation, told me his story. When in the years 1924 to 1926, Lenin embarked on his new economical experiment called "HEP" Introducing again private initiative and enterprise, be> was talked into going into again his

Textile business. Be opened a store hare and was quite successful. After one

year or so, suddenly his store wae closed , everything he possessed was taken

away from him, and he himself was put into jail and later sent to a hard labor

camp, leaving his wife and his children, (he showed me a sourvenir from this

time, a picture of his family, swollen from hunger, that hardly any faces

could be recognized.)

Those man had a pitiful smile for us whenever we were discussing our

situation and spoke to them about our hopes to get out from here and back to

our homes. They said they aleo had at the beginning many years ago, the same

hope and look what cams out of it. They gpi quoted some rusalan saying to this

effect, that for people in those regions, the door coming in was very wide,

but the exit is very s&ull. In a way they ridicule* the whole system. Whenever something got mixed

up, they used to say, it is, "Pojalanu", they meant to say, that it is accor-

ding to the five year plan* 162

Whenever we finished loading a heavy truck with timber, after much, much effort, lifting and carrying, everything with our bonds and should©!*©, they used to about, Bereetugalll Ameriku I It meant wo surpassed America.

They expressed just by tasking fun, the same idea which I noticed at different occasions, lbs Russians are at every occasion, comparing their achievements with those of the taaxtt. Americans and try to impress the people that they are equalling me BUT passing them. There is a definite inferiority complex

In their attitude towards the tJ. 3.

Once sitting during the rest period we we were talking about shoes.

A decent pair of shoes vau quite a treasure and a pair of hoots was a dream which only few could ngtanrii materialize* normally the Russians had to get along with vox? ingenlaar substitutes. Shoes are very seldom sold at stores and if so, only few can buy them. So all the others had to get their shoes or whatever you might call it, through some private channels and deals. So speaking about shoes I described to my friend the Desiatnlk the way we used to buy shoes before the war. ¥e went to a special shoe store,I told htm, where an attendant asked for your size, preferred color or fashion and then you tried on several pairs, walking up and down in front of a mirror, until you finally made ykaat your selection. The Desiatnik listened to my store1

(you are a witness that my story is true) he shook his head and here Is what he said, "we are big liare, and everybody knows it, * —.but „ ou are even a greater liar than we are." I didn't feel offended a bit for being called a liar after telling him this true little atory.

Those shoes are a precious comaodity indeed . I saw once during my wandering , an elderly russlan who was employed as a watchman in a landing place at the river I had to pass. The ruasian had only one boot on and his other leg was wrapped In rags. I thought that he is an invalid. Since he started some conversation with me, I asked him what happened to his legf Be answered rather indignant that there is nothing wrong with his leg, he had, 163

he said, to work for two years to Tray one 1)00*, now he has to work for Bounded another two years to buy the other one. This jssaasSx unbelievable to me at in that tlsae, hat X saw later at the bazaars / Central Jtussla, people actually selling cue shoe, the right or loft one only.

ID one of my conversations, I was complaining about the lack of newspaper. After all there is a war going on In which we are personally so much interested In end ve don't know what la actually happening. % Desiatnik answered rather philosophically', "What 1B the difference"? If you had the newapapere you wouldn't know too miah either. You know that there are two newspapers In Russia, one is Eravda, (raeaning Trwbb) the other Is I&vestje

(aaanslng Neve) hut there la ao truth In the Sews and no news In the Truth.?

The Bueaiaat, around us lived In snail places which couldn't even be called Tillages , in email huts containing one room only. This rooa was a kitchen, bedroom and living room In one. In winter the whole family slept around and cm top of the huge- brick oven. The furniture was of the most primitive sort, a talkie, a bench , eventually a few chairs, all self made.

There was nothing liko a closet, bo causa a few belongings were kept In an old fashioned trouaaou. Around tke kitchen there are a few pote and pans mostly from Iron or earthware. A few china plates and wooden spoons. Forks were seldom used. There is not too much clothes or laundry around, they poeeees only what they wear on their "bodies, with saybe an additional shirt or underwear. Some eort of a winter outfit Is here a very essential necessity. In every rusfiiaa hone, I saw In one corner of the room always Ikons, one or more.

They oould not observe any religious holidays because those are normal working days. But those of the older generations pray at home, the prayers they still remember iron old times. The new generation does not pray any more. 16*

In places which used to be old villages before, a little Russian

Orthodox Church can always be seen outstanding by Its Blsantlne arohiteo- ture. The typical BussIan Orthodox Cross is taken down and the building

Is used as a so-called Club or as a storage room for the Kolchox. The

Club where all the meetings take place contains a lot of red flags, of i course a big picture of Stalin and Lenin and smaller of all the Polit-

Bureau members. Some old provincial newspapers and propaganda literature are laying around. There is no recreation or amusement whatever. There is no social or community life and they don't visit one with another. They have no friends and are afraid of their neighbors.

Life is dull and all the days are alike. There Is only work and harder work. Time is divided between the woods and the little huts. The Ruselane were always so quick for a dance, a song with a Balallka tune, but during one those years I haven't seen ax russian dancing or heard a song. I remember only once during a cold winter night, I heard, from another barrack, where russian girls from an all-girl-wood-cutting team were living, a sad song with a melanoholic melody. Maybe she expressed this way her loneliness and her longing for a better life.

There were no radios. The only radios I saw were only in the little towns and even those were not sets but only loud speakers, wired to a central receiver over which from some local transmitter, propaganda speeches could be heard moat of the time. Nobody could of course tune In any station and it was completely out of question to listen to some foreign station, unless rebroadcaet by the Soviet transmitter. (Ho wonder that I am quite pessimistic about those Voice-of-.America broadcasts, because nobody has the radio receiver or apparatus for it.) The russians who spent some time during the war in Europe acquired there some German or Austrian radio sets, and If they were not taken away from them in the meantime, may possibly 166

I witnessed once a scene whloh moved me deeply. Wo were transferred late In the summer to a new place. It was an already established old settlement where a "Zavchoa" lived there with his wife. It was an old couple.

They were considered rich because they had their own oow. They were very friendly and helpful and everybody lilted them.

One day, the HKVD Commander came and told them that he has to move to another place. Somebody told us that the new place is very far away some 300 kilometers. Hobody knew the reason. There was no protest or lament. He said,

"ladno" (alright) and obeyed. He loaded his few belongings on the horse cart, put several bundles of hay and then seated himself there with his old wife.

The oow followed hesitantly bound with a rope to the rear of the wagon. He had tears in his eyes when he started his lonely trek into the woods late

in the afternoon.

Amongst the ruesians, you can hear frequently the slogan, "EPO HJE RABOTAJET,

HJB KUSHAJET", it meana "whoever doesn't work, doesn't eat," but you also hear the slogan reversed, "ETC RABOTAJET, NJE KUBHAJET", it means who works, doesn't eat. This Joke expressed in a wry humor is aimed at the many party officials who do not seem to work too hard and live according to the russian standard not too bad. Several times I have found In the woods some middle-aged women working.

They were there by themselves with no husbands, living in the barracks and work*

lng as manual labor. Once I asked one of them who was working nearby, what was her crime and why Is she here? Bier answer was, MJa Zdjesz Za Kyrova". (I'm here because of ijyrov"). It was In 195^ that Kyrov who was Stalin's closest co-worker was assassinated in Leningrad. It is known by now that this was the result of a love affair with his secretary whose jealous husband shot him.

But nevertheless at that time, his assassination started off a tremendous p4rge»which affected two million j»ople who were arrest^ ^^^^^ doportod. 167

So in this case, her husband who was a factory worker In Leningrad vas one night arreeted and ehe was shortly after deported. She never heard from her husband since. X asked her what she or her family had to do with Kyrov. Bothing of course was her answer, they never saw hia in their lives.

There were some other raselane here. In Fall,while working on one of the Lesopuakt's.a large group of russlans were brought in to cut tinker at our place. They moved In en separate barrack. Very primitive in their outlook and In their manner. Us learned that those are not deported russlans rather a sort of natives who lived In this part of the country since generations. They were free men In a sense, but they never left their place of was origin because there VJBJK no place for them to go. They didn't know anything about the outside world and nothing about the war going on. They lived in a Kolohos sons forty to fifty kilometers away and here Is the reason why they were brought to work In our Lesopunkt. Working the whole Bunasr as peasants in the Kblchos, they didn't raise enough grain for bread for themselves. It was Just enough to fulfill all the required quotas In kind from the crop to the government but nothing was left for them and their families. So during

the winter when normally the peasants all over the world are resting after the hard summer work, they had to cut timber In order to get breed, Just bread, to keep themselves and their families alive. They were working all day very hard and in the evening they were busy drying the bread they could buy here.

Bo bread was sold at the Kolchoz. The bread has to be sliced and dried around the stove in order to not get stale or molded. This dried bread called

"Sttkhary" they collected and stored away In burlap bags. When on the 7th of

Bovember the Rational holiday came, they loaded those quite heavy bags on their shoulders and started happily and In a festive mood in the evening 168

their way hems for a short -vacation. They told UB that it would take then the whole night to get horns with their most precious gift. It took them another night to march hack.

Apparently we were a strange lot for them. They looked at us like at eone sort of exotic animals. I rexaasber how they used to cone in large groups into our barracks after work for a visit. At first I felt somehow obliged to talk or to entertain thorn but I found out that they are not interested In any conversation at all. They Just wanted to see what we are doing and how ve behaved. (I guess animals in a Zoo might feel what we felt being constantly observed and watched). After an hour or so watohing us, one of the group called out "PASHLl" (let's go) and as if on a military command, all of them suddenly filed out. Those processions used to take place quite frequently and we got so used to it that it didn't bother us at all.

Once I noticed that the visitors sat at the bench along the walls and fixed their eyes on some subject under my cot. Then I discovered that my ehoe-atretchers which by some pure accident I brought along, was the object of their special attention. It seems that seme rumors weee spread around them about the strange gadget and they came in swarms to find out what mind of a "machine" I am keeping under my bed.

Seeing and living with those most primitive people, who besides the woods never saw or heard anything in their lives, I was wondering what Marx

Engels end the new Apostles meant to them. I found it rather Ironic that those people should be the "Avant.Garde" in the struggle for new human con- ceptions of relations between men and for a new world of better wooial and economic conditions. 169

FIHALLY REUNITED WITH OUR FAMILIES

Our people were working in the woods and shipped from one place to

another. This sort of life was dragging on until the end of May, 19^1.

Suddenly, a new change came. It seems that our constant complaints about

the separation of our families, resulted finally 1» some action. (As I

mentioned already once, it wa« the only caeo in the whole deportation action.)

An order came that all the families from Posiolok had to he moved to a new

place some hundred kilometers away and at the earns time, those working In

different places in the woods will be brought to the came. In other words,

the families will be reunited in tfce third place. The rumors to this effect

started already a month earlier and for this reason I wasn't sent back into

the woods after the four weeks of my reoouperation were over, And I stayed

with my family until the whole Posiolok was moved. Everything was done

as always in a big hurry, and we were shipped by trucks and by boats to the

new place. The people working in the woods, arrived more or lees at the

came time at the new P osiolok. It was a happy reunion indeed for all fami-

lies who were separated for nearly a year.

The arrival of my family was not altogether a happy one. What happened

is this. After we arrived with many others on the boat the men from the

families helped one another with the unloading. Because two men from a

friendly family helped me to bring our belongings to the truck where my wife

and two boys ware seated already, I felt obligated to otay behind in order to help them. So my family went ahead of me and I was to follow shortly with the next truck. Unfortunately there was as usual a breakdown and a delay of

several hours between the trucks. After I finally arrived it was already dark and I was confronted with the following scene. In the square of the new

Poslolok which I Just faced for the first time, my two beys were sitting with tears in their eyes on top of our belongings and. my wife wasn't there. What 170 happened? People vho arrived earlier from the voods occupied already some of thOBe huts meant for two families, the others who came with the trucks, rushed to the remaining ones. Vty wife with our hoys, who are not used to grab, and are rather the last in line, were left out and there was no place to move in. It was the first time that my wife who took "bravely everything in stride, not being able to provide a roof for the hoys for the night, suffered a nervous breakdown. The kind old lady who was a moral support in the previous Poslolok (I mentioned her before) took her into her little room and put her to bed. I spent the night with our boys in the room of another friendly family and the next day I moved in with my family

"by force to a room which I found still empty. It took a long time for my wife to recover.

LIFE IS THE NEW POSIOLOK

Life in the Posiolok called "T0PLI0VKA" was easier and better than in the previous one. The huts had normally two rooms, one room for a family.

They were built from wood, not from mud, and had doors and windows. The only trouble was that they contained millions of bed bugs that at night bothered

us immensely. Vty wife tried whatever she could scrubbing everyday, pouring

hot water (there were no insectioides here,) but of no use. Every night they

came in swarms and crawled all over us. Finally we came to the perfection of

killing them Just by pressing them with our thumb, that was the only means

of revenge. The russians said that the bugs are already in the wood.

Our food situation improved too. There was a Stolovka where twice daily

some soup and Kasza was sold. So, it was easier to feed the family.

Some eight kilometers away was a little town with a hospital, ambula-

torium and post office. Every Sunday was a market there, where some vege-

tables could be bought and what was more Important, some of our belongings

could be sold. 171

Of course not everybody could go there because permission from the HKYD

Commander vw necessary and not everybody could get it. But people who vent there took along commissions for the others.

Incidentally, the HOD Ccsnander from the previous Posiolok who knew by now everybody by heart, came over here and took charge of UB here too.

He belonged already to us and ve got sort of used to him as prisoners get used to their wardens.

A few of the older boys and girls were allowed to attend the school in the nearby little town. Because they hardly could walk back and forth the same day, the HEVD found a place for them where they stayed over the week and ate in the caramon Stolovka. Saturday afternoon, they used to walk back to the

Posiolok and stayed here with their families until Sunday afternoon.

Ve were working in the nearby woods as wood cutters just the same. How- ever, it was a considerable Improvement. At first we didn't have to walk so far, four to six kilometers only and secondly, after work we came "home" to our families. In the woods we were harrassed by mosquito* and a certain type of small fly which ve have never seen before. They were biting like stitch- lag with needles and had the habit of sneeking into the mouth,eyes and ears.

In spite of the warn weather I had to wear my quilted winter outfit and some sort of cover made from handkerchiefs around my neck for protection.

We were told that we are settled here for good and should start thinking of our future, to secure some provisions for the winter specially potatoes.

To tills aim, every family was given a small patch in a common vegetable garden to cultivate and to grow potatoes. Actually potatoes were brought over and sold to us to be used as seeds in our garden. In the evenings and in our free time we were tending those little vegetable gardens. It gave us satisfaction to watch them growing and some sort of competition started to nee whose garden looked better. 172

HtFORMIRG, HEPOOTIHG, AND BESOCHCIATIOt* ( as part of the system. )

I was often asked what keeps the Soviet system In pover for so many years.

After all there are scoe 220 million people In Russia and the Communist

Party has a membership of three to four millions only, depending vhether this census is taken before or after a purge. How can such a small minority keep in a dictatorial tight grip the dissatisfied millions without any sign of revolt.

In faot in those northern regions like in our place of deportation, one

HKVD Deputy with one pistol only, ruled over several thousand people and no body was even thinking of disarming him or of expressing resistance In one way or another.

According to ay experience there are three reasons for it.

First, the RED-WAGOH with bread. Every day In the morning a covered red wagon brought bread to our post, enough to feed the people for one day only, with the exception of Saturday when the bread was brought for two days. Where

can you go with one days bread-provision, in a country where nobody is going ^7 to share his bread with you even among his own family? Hospitality is a fine thing but you have to have the material means to express his friendly feel-

ings towards his fellow man. Besides coming to some other place, everybody would notice the stranger and no store providing bread for people of a particular place, would seal breed to somebody who is unknown here and where nobody knows where he is working. "GBJE T KIM RABOTAJSSjl", i.e., "where and

at what are you working" are the first questions a Russian is asking you like

a greeting. But he expects a definite and not an evading answer?

Second, People are kept busy all the time. Work is compulsory for every- are body and after work there/always lines to stand in for something when not meetings to attend until everybody is physically exhausted. There is no time 173

for leisure or relaxation, no time for discussion or reflection. Every- body has a full time Job, Just to keep alive, to exist and he simply does not care for anything else.

Third, the omnipotent and ubiquitous HKVD Secret Police vho knows everything about everybody at any time. This is done by an enormous spy and reporting system whnee nobody Is safe enough to express his mind. He is not even sure of his own family, of co-workers In his place of work and of he oourse not of people/might casually meet on the street or somewhere In a line waiting for something. Everywhere is somebody who will get in touch with the KKTD Headquarters and who will report on him. The next thing he will know will be a knock on the door at night and the man or woman might disappear for life.

low come that so many people turned out to be Informers to the HKVD?

In the first place Is the Youth organized In "Pioneer" or later on

"Komsomol", groups and Indoctrinated In the Communist Dogma. It Is their first duty to expose (the russlan favorite expression Is "to unmask") every enemy of the Soviet system Including their own families and parents, there Then/are the men or women who became already members of the communist party and they are eager to prove their worthiness.

Some people are looking for small prlvdlegee or material rewards. We had them among ourselves and they consisted of three different types of people. a) those were former communists and their party-membership-card didn't save them from deportation, together with the thousands of others. They wanted to show that they are not dlssolutloned and were still faithful to the communist party and to the Soviet System. They proved It by reporting and denouncing others. 17^

b) Some were looking for an eaaier Job and were hoping for some better career . So they volunteered in reporting , expecting a reward for it. c) Some people were Just plain mean ,

Those were the cases where people more or less volunteered for their dirty reporting Job.

But there were cases where people turned involuntarily informers.

Those were the cases where people committed some small transgressions .

They were called before the HKTO and threatened with heavy punishments but they were promised leniency when they in turn would be willing to denounce others.

In most cases those men had no alternative but to accept the offer.

Those people could be recognized because they became suddenly silent and completely brokendown. You could see that those people were suffering deeply, like they would experience some terrible struggle within themselves.

Sometimes it was too hard for them to carry this burden on their conscience and they confided to some of their friends.

The most important thing was that those people once started, reporting could never stop it any more. They were under high pressure all the time, to bring more news to tell them what people are talking and thinking about.

And if they didn't have anything to report, they had to make up frequently some storiea. This was an unhappy lot because sooner or later people found out about them and they were looked at with sort of fear and contempt, at the same time.

So here is the answer to all questions about uprising, revolt or even revolution. It is interesting to note that the ruseians who were themselves harraased by their spies, had more confidence in some of us than they had in their own kind. On many occasions, those elderly more intelligent nareians confided in me their critical xaSfand feelings about the Soviet System. 175

what they wouldn't dare to do In the presence of their fellow co'mtrymen.

To disguise our conversation, the russians ar. soon as somebody approached ug, switched the conversation and started to preach how everybody should work for Soviet Russia and for the great loader Stalin.

JRESPCSJSIBIL3K (Soviet Rasaiae Idea)

We are using freely the woa?d ,,BeaponaibIlity,, la arm? daily lives*

We aay for instance, I or he is responsible for this or that job, or somebody will he held responsible for the result of a certain action. However when things don't work out as expected, excuses and explanations are genuinely accepted. Rot so in Soviet Russia.

I mentioned before the important position of the "Glavbuoh" (chief any accountant) in^undert&kijQg and hie great responsibility. The Glavbueh's responsibility is a real one, It means Jail when somethings goes wrong, if there is a lag in production or a deficiency iu the inventory.

Sere are some instances of the Russian idea of responsibility.

There was one incident at the Poe ioloJt which I think is worthwhile to report in this connection.

I mentioned previously that a so-called Zavehci (Civil Administrator) was in ohargje of the maintenance at the PoeiolQk. He was a middle-aged russian, a amulet pan who came over io this place more or less at the same time as we arrived with his wife and two children. Be had to Ms disposal a couple of horses because among others it was his duty to bring the supplies from outside for us. Once it happened that one of the horses broke his leg what could be expected considering that there were no real roads. We didn't pay any special attention to this faot. One day the ZAVOHOV «ns the i^t"

Commander left together and when he cane back he told the people casually that he went this day to court where he was sentenced to two years jail* 176

The Commander with whom he vas fcuite friendly (some people even said that they were drinking together) accused him of negligence and testified against him. In a few days, the Zavohov in a matter of fact manner said goodbye, leaving his family behind. He started his march for some hard lahor camp where he was supposed to serve his sentence. Here we learned for the first time two things. First, a horse is more important for the

Soviet economy than a huuan heing. If some worker would have "broken his

leg certainly no one would have cared and there would have been no court

trial and no sentence. Secondly, we learned here, the Soviet idea of

personal responsibility. "When something goes wrong, no excuses are taken suspected hut somebody is always xxxxx&xx and accused of Intentional damage or

sabotage and has to be severely punished for it. (I learned more about

this responsibility which is taken literally and very strict later.)

No wonder that everj body fears any responsibility and you could scare

everj russian, Including the commander when he was told that he would be

held responsible for something. For the same reason, nobody wants to give

anything in writing and it is very difficult to get somebody to sign some

paper.

Another case of responsibility I have witnessed.

In our first "Uczastok" we had as our technical administrator called

"Haczalnik" a russian wiio was quite reasonable. There were several hundred

men working under his direct inn in groups, called brigades. He was a hard

working man organizing our groups, checking our work in wide"spread places

in the woods, then working until late at night figuring and reporting.

After several months a strange thing happened. Suddenly we saw the Naczalnik

working himself In a brigade, cutting trees as a plain manual worker. 177

'I // Ve were told that he was demoted to a Lesorub, it means a woodcutter and he will be called into court for a trial In the nearest future. The reason; he didn't fulfill the plan which was worked out in advance concerning the amount of cubic meter to be cut for a certain period. The fact that he had to put up with workers of our kind, having no experience whatever and no knowledge, how even to approach a tree, waB not taken into consideration. The Russian saying "Sevednya Naczalnik Zavtra Lesorub"

(today a director and tomorrow a woodcutter) became true In our own eyes.

This situation gives the people the feeling of constant fear and as they say, everybody who has some sort of a supervising position, is always with one leg in prison already, at least he is prepared to go to Jail sometimes anyhow. In fact most of the people I met there, free or deportees, have had a prison sentence one time or another. There is even a sort of

Bon-Mot that a prison sentence of no more than two years is considered as a

"DietskyJ Srok" it means a sentence like for children. A man with a higher in prison sentence sad his pant record is looked upon with some thought of respect,

THE OTJTBHJEAK OF THE GERMAN SOVIET WAR

The mail was functioning better than before because of the post office in the nearby little town which had a little port on the river. The mall came by boat faster than by horse drawn wagon. People received there packages, money and letters from their relatives in the Russian occupied territory and sometimes even from abroad. However, therafwas something curious about the letters in those early June days. Horaally they were full of encouragement to cheer us up and to make us hope for the beat, but 8§w the letters contained a different tune. In a hidden way - afraid of censorship- ve were made to understand that the match between the Hazie and the

Soviets didn't work out perfectly after all. They reported of some nervousness between the ruesiane and noticed that some ruseIan families are even going back. Who knows, ve were told, in those letters by our families, whether we will not be better off being far away than they near the Germane. A» those were really big news for us considering that we didn't know anything about the outside world, V^a far as the ruselana were concerned the was was finished. It was what they used to tell us at every occasion.

How the 22nd of June 19^1 came. The boys and girls who just left the Pcfiiolok for school came in a hurry back. They were turned back by the

HKYD man from the higher Esohelons who were on their way to us. In their hurried excitement the school kids told us what they had just heard. A war broke out between Germany and Soviet Ru nia and the Nazis bombed already with their "Blitz" tactics, many russlan cities.

The news spread out like a forest fire amongst the population. Every body was excited and tried to grasp the meaning of this event and the gravity of the aUDEfe situation. The war was not over yet as the russians thought, it has Just started.

Pretty soon, the MKVD higher officers from the nearby little town Join^e by our local commander, appeared In our settlement, looking grave and somber.

A meeting was called to the square and everybody had to be present. The highest ranking officer of the HKVD informed us officially of the War which was

Just starte* by the Hazls. He called them now Fascists - dogs ga±H again and not Just Germans as only a few weeks earlier. Be Is sure-hie added'that among us are Razls /Japanese (8ic) spies, and therefore we will be treated as enemie of the Soviet Union. From now on, nobody is supposed to leave the Posiolok 179 and no permission will be granted. The school klda will attend no schools any more and will stay here. Their belongings will be sent back to them.

Farther restrictions and directions will follow.

Everybody left the meeting with the feeling of deep depression and anxiety. How could we, the first Nazi victims of all people be suspected and accused of spying for them and for a full measure for the Japanese too?

The next few days brought the last mall from our dear ones. Many have not seen them nor heard from them since.

After the short period where the conditions for us Improved we were heading for a hard time again.

At first our Seslatnik's seemed to have received orders to get tough with us, demand more work from us and not to fraternize with us. So those men who talked to us freely and with some we became good friends, shunned us and restricted themselves to orders given in connection with our work and no more.

In addition to it, special guards were brought in which we didn't have before and watched us working. What was most annoying was the fact that having no permission to go to the nearby town, we couldn't sell anything from our be* longings. Having no other resources because all the mall and packages stopped suddenly and earning only a few rubele for our work, we ran out very soon of money and oould hardly buy even the meals from the Stolovka.

However, after several weeks the situation improved. The special guards were withdrawn and the restrictions relieved. After all, they couldn't find any people around us spying for the Nazis or Japanese and I guess they didn't find any radio transmitters either. But the real reason was as I found out years later, reviewing after my liberation what happened in the meantime, that the Soviets accepted gratefully all the help they oould get from the Allies, lfaturally they couldn't antagonize them by greeting us as enemies. So they changed their hostile attitude with us, and we still didn't know what our 180

^actually wee. (imentloned it already that our situation changed frequently,

sometimes to batter, sometimes $b worse, dependlngJBn the world situation

and on the pressure; of the puliic opinion. Of course, while being there

we were not aware of it.)

How they appealed to our deeire to fight the common enemy and to our

patriotic feelings and asked uo to work harder than ever. They cancelled

the rest day on Sundays and we were to work seven days a week for several

weeks until we nearly broke down. Day after day, week after week, to march

long distances to the woods, to work there with nothing to look forward to

with no rest whatever, with the same meager monotonous food, was a hard ex-

perience indeed.

Sow we had a chance to talk to our Russian co-workers again. They were

excited about the new big events. They inquired secretly from some of us who

the Germans are and what they look like. They saw in them in the beginning

a big chance of being liberated at last. After our bitter experience with

the Balis we couldn't give them too encouraging information)but they hoped In

spite of it. The Soviets made those deported ruselane some promisee for the

future and tried to win over their sympathy and oooperatlon. They made spec-

ially overtures to the young generation about to be drafted to the army,

promising them to become free and to obtain "passports", ae full-fledged citi-

zens, what they couldn't even dream of before. And then of course was a new

decree containing a tremendous challenge and temptation that the uniform and

the boots are becoming every soldiers property.

How then rumors started to the effect that we will be set free in the

near future. It is an amazing thing about those rumors. We were in the wilder-

ness, some 200 miles from the next railroad station, with no means to communi-

cate with the outside world, with no mail in months, with no radio or newspapers

and suddenly sens rumor spreads and nobody knows where It starts. 161

It seems like some people would have the capacity of radio receivers) picking up the neve from the plain air*

Of course all those rumors whenever brought by somebody to the attention of the KETO deputy were promptly denied. We aere told again and again, to forget our past and to give up our hope, even to go back to our homes.

Here ve axegoing to stay , here in the woods will be our and our childrens future. Somehow we still were not completely convinced of the veracity of those statements and were rather with great expectations looking forward to great events and changes to come.

And one day they really came. In the first days of August , IpAl,

somebody came from the nearby little town telling us that a message was broadcast over the radio to the effect that a Treaty of Friendship was signed

between General Sikoreki In behalf of the exiled Polish Government in London

and Stalin. We learned later that it was on the JOth of July 19^1.

The impact of this news was tremendous. So we became friends and are net enemies of the Soviet any more. Our morale received a tremendous boost and ve were riding high* What about uo now? People started speculating what

is going to happen to us.

HBLaAI'IGS FROM OUS JSffCKEATICS STATUS (Leaving our forced Labor Camp )

The next days brought more good news. A message came from somewhere that according to the Polish Soviet friendship pact, a Polish Army will be

organized In the USSR and we will be declared as free citizens. We were over- whelmed by those wonderful news. It is true we couldn't leave Soviet Russia yet, but it was a great step forward and a long way from our first days of deportation.

The Russians took those news with mixed feelings. They never witnessed before what they aaw with their own eyes now, that people actually were let 132

free from this great prison and so they themselves could hope to become free some day. On the other hand, there was naturally a feeling of envy that

It happened to ue and not to them. They still had to work In the voods ae

In previous years, day by day, with no change In sight.

At the end of August, l

Our prayers and hopes finally cams true. We wore deeply moved and no eye was dry at this moment. Somebody Intoned the Polish Rational Anthem and the J'-.^1 ; n^urvA'-0'' • •">•• others fell In (few communists among us, were singing the loudest.) The Russians who only a few days earlier would have jailed us for that, bowed their heads, standing at attention. Everybody had the feeling that this is a crucial moment in hie and his family's lives. It wasn't a feeling of patriotic or national pride, it wae rather a feeling of Thanksgiving that we lived to see this day.

Ve were asked to come next day to the office where we will receive our new document called "uTOGTOVERISIJB" confirming e& our release. At the same time, we would have to register where we want to go because our future place of residence will have to be written into our release certificate.

I think that only little children slept that night. Everybody else was disousslng with his friends which place of domicile to choose. Of course no* body knew where to go. Someone suggested some city, known only from heresay 105

and there was always as much argument for It ae against It. Besides moat

of the well-known places vere restricted to us. Some people decided to stick together no matter which place would be chosen. Others Joined every time another group whenever they changed their plane. It was a general tendency to head for the South for two reasons.

First, people figured that In the South, with its hot climate there would be no problem of heating or keeping warm. People were also convinced that with the abundance of fruits of which the South is famous, there couldn't be any question of hunger or starvation, (it turned out later that both assump- tions were wrong and the results of this reasoning were fatal to thousands.) kit • The second reason, were a general belief that Russia In spite of her very long preparation for war, will break down under the impact of the Nazis and it would be of great advantage to be at that critical moment, near some border (for Instance the Persian frontier), with a better chance to escape to some neutral or allied country.

There was still a group of people who considered the possibility to remain here for the winter. People reasoned this way:

It is already late In the year (September) and the strong winter is coming very fast. We have here our little hut (net too good but still a roof over our heads) wood is no problem and besides we would have some potatoes which we grew on our little garden patches. Spending the winter here we will be spared the wandering Into the unknown with children with all the hardships to be expected. In the meantIme we shall hear from our friends, who certainly will put up residence somewhere and In the coming Spring, we shall Join then. I must admit that I belonged to this small group, who was willing to stay here for the wlntor. 1 k

It is true that it was a way of least resistance but this plan had definitely some merits. However, before I reached my final decision, I thought it advisable to consult my Russian friend, the Dsslafcnik I mentioned already before. Sis answer was logical and simple. He said, nobody ie staying voluntarily in a prison after he is free. Besides he said, when the

Russians let you go, you go, losing no time because nobody knows whether or when the Soviet authorities might not change their decision. How wise vas this man and how true was his prophecy. Tears later I heard that people who reasoned similarly were not allowed to leave any more. Some had to wait years until they could get out from those northern regions because they were completely cut off fran every contact with other groups and no help could be extended to them.

Bearing this so selfless advice, I decided to leave with my family and

I Joined a small group consisting of five families and we selected a middle- size town on the river Kama, called SARAPUL in the UEMURTSKAJA S.8.R. T*e figured we might be able to spend here sometime, finding some shelter and work.

The next day we lined up in front of the office where we registered our place of destination and received our "UDOSTOVEEOHJE". Some people had to make a quick decision during the day when they found out that the place they had thought of, was restricted. Others changed their minds during the day and had a hard time to get the place already written in their document, changed.

I personally was very much surprised at that time, I was handed over the release document for me and my family, because I was given back a document which was confiscated from me a long time ago during my first registration after we arrived to our first place of deportation. I considered it ae already lost for ever. I was very much impressed by the efficiency of the

HKVD Administration. CB OUR WAX TO SARAPUL ALONG THE BIVBR KAMA

We spent the next days with packing and digging out potatoes from our garden patch, (we harvested some 0 lbs of them and took them along in a sack.) 1C5

Finally, our turn came to be loadod on a horse-cart which brought us to our little town called KRAS10VISKERSK. While leading our Poeiolck and passing the woods BO familiar to us, ve enjoyed the feeling to leave those places which were witnesses of our misery forever. This le a rather rare and strange feeling. Under normal conditlone when we say, Goodbye to a place, there is always a possibility or even the wish, to come back and the departure dooe not imply any unusual emotion. But here was the feeling of looking back to 'once in a life time" experience. I wa& thinking of the many more who will be brought here to take over our places. Maybe they will be veterans from other labor campe or maybe novices as we were. Their misery and suffering will be however Just the same. Will they ever leave the place as we did? f Here In the little town we had to wait for the elver boat which had to bring us to the next city with a railroad station SOLEMN^. V? took shelter In the home of one of my russian friends, under whose supervision

I was working and who had his little house here. Wo stayed hero Tor three days until word came that the boat had arrived. Ve expressed our gratitude to our friends by leaving a pair of our boys shoes and this gift was Joyfully aoceptea. with mixed feeling of good wishes and envy, our friendly russian family bid us goodbye.

When we embarked with several hundred other people, the little boat, we didn't realise at that time that we Just started a very long and thorny

Journey. The passengers consisted of our group and nearly a whole Posiolok of peasants who were brought over here for embarkation from another place.

They were those peasants who were deported by the russlans in the early months of 19U0. They were accused at that time, that they were the tool of

the Polish government, to colonize the population of the eastern border of

Poland which consisted of national minorities. It was the first time that

I had actual contact with this people and it was difficult for me to under- 186

stand how they could bo used for such a task. Those peasants hardly could speak Polish themselves and their language was a medley of Polish , Buaaian and Ukrainian, (naybe the assimilation worked the other way around.}

From here I recall a strange incident. While waiting for the beat at the River bank, every family sitting near their bundles, suddenly I heard

some little children screaming near the river. I ran down and this is what

I saw. A woman was dragging her two children Into the river ant" from her uttered words, I understood that she wanted to drown hex-self and the two frightened children. I called for help and we finally brought her and the

children back to the beach. She told us that somebody from her group stole her belongings and there is no use for her and her children going on living.

She was a widow and it waB all she possessed. Somebody from her group promised her to find the culp&it'and she quieted down . This incident gave us a warn-

ing that thievery became a big probmem*

Ve were traveling as a close group of five families and we realized that

from now on we have to get organised and to do some planning. At first we decided that our belongings should be guarded constantly dap and night. It was done as all the men in our group were put on guard duty. One man at day

time and two men at night. The guard was changed every four hours. Then we decided to use in our Journey, boats, rather than railroads.

We got our foretaste of traveling with trains when we reached, after two days traveling on the boat, the first railroad station SOLIKAMSK. Russians were sitting all over on benches, floors, in dirt and filth waiting for days for some traki. The lines before the ticket box were terrific. Only a few tickets were sold and then closed again. Even having already tickets, it mas quite a problem to get into the train. It was easier for us because we didn't have to buy any tickets and besides the railroad officials who never saw dobuments like ours before, were in the beginning, very much Impressed by them 187

and gave ua sons sort of priority . But still to board a train in a group of five families was a Jaajor operation where everybody had his assignment and vas responsible for a certain number of luggage. There were several children also in our group besides ours that had to be taken care of .

Our food consisted of bread which we could buy in some places after presenting our documents. Sometimes one of our group, our friend I mentioned at different occasions, who spoke a very good ruseIan, had to get permission bo buy bread from higher authorities like the NKVD cr CitySoviot. He with his convincing fine manners vas always successful, (it was the same man from the family which Joined us in our truck on our way to the station during our deportation. We and his family kept friendship from this very moment and were our companlero* during this exasperating Journey.) Sometimes we also succeeded to buy some soup or Kassa in one Stolovka or another.

The SUtyBAK? and our potatoes we still carried untouched as an emergency reserve. We arrived by train in the city of Molotov which is the capital of the whole Obiaat, cabled MolotovekaJaJ Here the same picture as the previous station, with more confusion and bigger meases of people waiting everywhere.

Our group consisting of five families boarded a boat which was sailing, southward, all along the river Kama.

The beat was terribly overcrowded because of the masses of recruits who were called into the army. Those were mostly peasants of different ages ranging from the 20's to the late ifO's. We succeeded to get bread sometimes from them because the russiane were bartering it against Machorka and ve happened to have a few packages which we could buy in the Posiolok and didn't use until now. One of our ladies found Grace In the eyes of the boat cook and he gave her from time to time, warm water which we put to good UBS with the coffee Ersatz. The sanitary conditions are hard to describe. It came to a 188

point that the open cannon toilet was ueed by men and women at the same time and the moat primitive deoenoy was gone again. There were no cabins.

People slept wherever they could. We for Instance, slept on top of a heap of sheet metal which was staaked in the middle of the boat. Our children slept an our bundles and suitcases. We had to keep constant "vigilance and guard because thievery became more and more an acute problem.

In spite of our vigilance one night a suitcase belonging tc our friends disappeared. It wae in our conditions* a rather major disaster. We were looking all over the boat but nothing could be found. Suddenly a sailor from the crew appeared and whispered something in the ear of my friend. He told him that he should check the cabin of another crew member. The captain was asked for help, altering the cabin of the suspect we found the whole contents of the suitcase there and he admitted that he threw the empty suitcase overboard during the dark night. Our friend was surely glad to get back his belongings because not even the smallest thing could be replaced any more and he didn't mind the sacrifice of the empty suitcase. (What happened to the culprit, And what made the other sailor denounce his colleague, we didn't know.) The land along the river is flat, uxd sons villages and small towns could be seen on both river banks. During our stops more and more recruits came aboard. Many of them were drunk. We had not seen drunk people in a long time and so the encounter with them was a very unpleasant one. Russia

And Vodka is always synonymous but it seems that there was no Vodka on aloca- tlons of toe "5 year plan" for those hard-working and miserable people in the far North. Once a man in the forty's also drafted came up to us and saw our boys sleeping (it was late at night). He looked at them for a while and he started crying, he aaid, he Just left two of his boys at home and who knows whether he will see them again. 189

One night we were avakened by a terrific galling and spreading. I never before in my li-'o heard human voices sound like that. We ran to the next window to see wiiat had happened. The ocane was terrifying. Hundreds of women were standing outside the "boat station and ware waiting and lament- ing. They cane to eee off their husbands or eons leaving for their garri- sons with our l>oat. The families and the recrulte had the feeling they will never eee one another and therefore thoee heart-breaking ecenee. After witnessing those eceneis I became leee harsh in Judging those drunken recruits oomlng aboard. Maybe it was the only way to overcome their ftkji deep emotions.

ARRIVAL IH SARAFUL

We finally arrived In the middle of Septeriber 19ta at our destination, and the City of Sarapul, where we intended to te&e up temporary residence according to our assignment In our document. We arrived at night and the de- barkation of our group was a Major operation considering that we had six aaall children in our group, no outeide help and in addition .c it, the station building of the little port was on top of a hill. We had also to watch that nothing should be stolen In the last moment In our excitement and confusion. Ve had to spend the night In a room which might be called a waiting room, already full with people.

The next day in the morning the oen of our group left their families in the waiting room. At first wo wanted to find name food and then to see the city authorities and to inquire how to go about finding living wuartere and how to find none worfe. The city itself of coca 50,000 population, wasn't too impressive, fiocause of the rainy season which had already started, the streets and the pavements were full of mud. Only a few stores were open and we could buy some bread and in one store, actually cigarettes were sold. *90

We finally found tuo City-8ovlet and ware admitted to the PRED6EDATEL, presiding officer, corroppnnding to our .fayor. As we presented our documents, there we were told that ve can not take up residence here and that/will he no work for us either. We etresBed the fact that the NKV33 registered un for this place, but of no avail. He eaid, the City hue itu own raleo and nobody can tell them

otherwise. We vent from here to the HKVD headquarters and ar^ced them for their help* After all they were the ones who gave :t* cur documents tc settle here.

But we nade no headway . So here fc* the first tiae vha.t we encountered, later

on frequently one authority did not respect the ardors of jnot^or. One thing the NKVD did was to change our plaoe of residence to another in UKBBEDKM]! (Cen- tral Asia), which would enable us tc travel couth.

We cans vith bad nowe bac>: to our families. Worn out and tired ve had

to start from all over again. But how to get en a boat which seldom stopped

here and was already crowded to full capacity when it arrived? It was a

situation short of aieBaater. The days we spent in the waiting roast full of

filth and dirt with some rueaiana practically living there. The sanitary

conditions were beyond any descriptions. Hare we acquired our first lice.

During the night, we had to watch our belongings^ to be alert and to look out

for an eventually arriving boat which would take us. The boats arrived at

night only. iBvery night new recruits errivud. and settled for several houre

in the earns waiting rooms. Some wers drunk and peeing iv strangerp, nade fun

of us and annoyed UB. Some were locking for a fifjht. They vere yell frig all

the tine, smoking of course and the air was no stale and heavy that w© hardly

could breathe. The worst think was that they never failed to wake up our children who looked at them with fearful and frightened ©yen. Jfy wife hod a hard time

to isroteot them vith her aroe and to $uiet then d.r*m. 191

LEAVING 8ARAHIL AHD SAILING COUTH A10KC TMVOIfQft

After spending CTOC ton days under those horrible conditlono where the waiting room became our hone and -m had no chance to undress and to wash we finally succeeded cae night to get on a boat leading south. We sighed with relief when ut were once e.iir'n together sitting on our belongings. It war the end cf ^oiJtombo-,•, 19^1.

Oar boat Cidn't have any provisions to feed the passengers. Soraetiaee people would buy scoe'uhing from the kitchen. One of our ladies made the acquaintance with the chef presenting him with ecuae small gift and he allowed her to cook there occasi^aial',/* So we started using our potatoes and our ladles Managed soaetineG to make some sort of potatoe coup which tasted delicious.

At first we were sailing still along the river Kama which flows into the Volga. He were aailing then South along the river Volga until i*ie very end where the Volga empties into the Kaspian Sea.

Sailing along the Volga under normal conditions we certainly would have enjoyed to watch the beautiful countryside, the passing bi£ river boats, the tremendous loads cf logs, tie* together and trqflgpojfed down the river with only a few aon haphasaardly Jumping around them to keep them under control.

It would have "iccr. nice to watch the wonderful nlghte with, the millions of glittering stare b.it not under our conditions. Our mindo were completely occupied with problems of plain svwvivr.1. How to get sone focd for our families and hey to protect them from vermin and how to get some sleep.

Along the Volga, stoppijtjg at cities like KDJBYSHEV, SSXSRAH, SARATOV we took on more and more passengers. Hero came for the first time aboard the russian refugeeo fleeing from the Ukraine beforo the rapidly advancing Nazis. 192

Bear* we heard the first report of the Nazi terror and horror.

At Saratov ve docked* alongside another ship, fall of people sailing to the Borth. It vaa unusual because the whole human stream headed south. X became curious specially when X heard that they were speaking a different language. X started some conversation with them and found out that those were

Germans from the Goraan-Volga-ASSR. They spoke a very antique German as It Is known only from the 'toTTEL-HOCH-IXSKPSCH" literature and not knwn any more in the German speaking countries In Europe. The Germans who were settled here by

Catherine the Great and became very prosperous farmers on the Volga soil* were organised under the Soviets as an Autonomlc German Republic with their own

Administration, Schools and Communist party. Now the whole population (some half a million} Including their Communist partyy. leaders and members were deported to the Horth. They were accused of being the fifth German Column and of hiding German Parachuted Spies. Not one soul* was left. They were cm their way of deportation, heading north and nobody actually knows where they were finally settled.

Our people who came aborad in Saratov, confirmed us this story and told us in addition to it, that they were very much encouraged by the HSVD authorities to settle down In those German cities, like HJGELS, where they could find the most comfortable homes with old german styled furniture and even some food stock left. But they preferred to go south being afraid of the Germans, moving rapidly toward the Volga. Ve passed Stalingrad which became later world famous as a battlefield and as a symbol of the Nazi defeat.

We saw now slogans all over. Instead of calling to arms for Stalin, and the great Bolshevik party, the people were urged to defend the Fatherland.

"8PASAJTE BOBHRr. Pointing to the attroeitles committed by the Nazis In the occupied Russian territories, the Russians were called upon to love and to save the

HDKf MOTHER RUSSIA, ft was significant that at this moment the Soviet resorted to the same slogans and appealed to the same patriotic feeling as the Czar*e 195

did during previous wars.

Nov during our journey along the Volga ve added a new Item to our meager food* All along the river banks were staples of Red Vatermellons which are growing here In abundance. At every stop of our boat ve ran ashore and bought some. They were very reasonable In price and "very good quality. Ve developed

In the beginning some stomach ailments because ve were not used to them and consumed rather big quantities but after some tine, the watermellon became our main nourishment. Most of those watermellons were bought up by the crew Itself.

They made a profitable business selling those mellons in the Morth, where they do not grow, on their way back.

Here on this river boat we spent Yom Kipper - the day of Repentence and fasting. The fasting was not a big sacrifice at that time on our part beeause ve wore well trained for it. There were only a few of us here to pray 3n. nhe required quorum. Vith some sort of sentiment X went back in ffly memories to the same holiday, vhioh we spent the previous year, while working in the woods, with the unforgettable man leading our prayers. It tea a far cry in distance and in our outlook for the future. Ve couldn't even have dreamed of suoh a change.

BHC0UHT3R OX THE FIRST LIBERATKD INMATES FROM COKBiaUTiVB LABOR GAMPS

On our way along the Volga ve met at different places some very strange looking people. During the last tvo years we hardly could develop any discrimina- ting taste for fashion. Ve saw people dressed so differently, some in regular suits, according to the Russian fashion, some In half uniforms, some in patched up rags, sewn together. Ve ourselves were dressed in a way that the appearance of our garments in the street here could cause indignation and would be considered a public offence. But the appearance of those men surpassed even our imagination.

Their apparel consisted of quiltad pauts, tied at the ankels vith a Btring, a long quilted Jacked called BUSHLAT and some sort of a cap as head cover. Everything in a black color. Instead of shoes, they wore some sort of sandals made from old ...„ -fciaes and held together with a rope. Some had a shirt on but most had none. AS-_luSgage . 19^

tbey carried on a string over the shoulder, eoiae nort of a metal oiip cor a discarded food tin can. It wap all that tho.- had. Some had a spoon

sticking out from a pocket. Then© wore :"'. 10 woman asumrj them d-vossc-1 simi-

larly with the exception that paw still had -'rlr^g cm. We foarn1 cut that

those were the "LftGROVCY" inmates of corrective labor canpe vho wr<> In

acoordancs M..U the SIKORSKI-STALEi PACT, net free at the SCU^/HO were.

ThoB« wero the single tion and wcnon aracn£f;t the refugees vho wet's

arrested before our deportation and then clientgeared, TL;ey cans now in big

maseee from labor camja, from dlaXarent places and directione and all of

them were heading south.

We found amongst than people we knew from before but they changed In

such a short tine to such an extent that *.te hardly could re^o&nise them.

Of course we had changed in the tsaantlao tco.

Ve had a onance to talk: to hundreds of then. 1 'Ion'^ intend t:» report

their experience in those ihard 1-ihr-r caapc for tea roaBoao. rir&t, there

are already hooka written by fjnnates of thine casipa and secondly, this would

be a second-hand information because I mjrzo'S wasn't there. Hevei L'lelees

- would like to mention three facts vMch vere the coaacn experience of all

of them wherever they wore. Thone three facts '..-ere stroeref by ra»i'v reliable

men I was talking to during our Journey and in later yearc.

First, those men and women >\fter many months of probing in different

prisons and futile attempts reinforced by physical Maltreatment, to exert

some confession of being a -v>y, t?.wy wero finally oont to a hard laboi- camp.

After some time, everyone was handed ?. sentence ranging fron three to eight

years. Those aeTotenceB w»re given "by a three can court,, eat up in i>loscow

in ABSSfTIA of the Defendant. They never caw the Judges ar.tt thoy were not

even notified that there trial vill take place. r.vhody la:sw why anu got three

veare OIKI somebody ?lee for the same alleged transgress ion, eight years. In 195

most cases the crime Indicated. In the sentence was illegal crossing of the Russian border. As the Russian border was considered the Molotav- flibbentrop lino which divided Poland In two parts. Those refugees were sentenced because they wore found In this part of Poland which t-he Pueeiana considered already as their territory. Tim fact tliat eoaae arrived there at a tine when it was still Poland and a border there did not exist, didn't II h natter. It was still illegal according to the .Soviets.

Second, they worked there cnm in lumbering, some on railroads and ectte in mines, under the supervlsim of Russian criminals called UHKA'S sentenced to many years for ordinary crimes even murder. Those Tlrka's - a bandit element, exercised a reign of terror and nobody even the Russian

HKVD guards did interfere. Those criminals took away from them everything they lilced. Nobody dared to res let.

A friend told me how he lost his shoes there. Three of those TJrka'e were playing cards and ft o stales for the winner vas...^ friend's shoes.

Of course he didn't know anything abcuft his crooked deal until one of those

criminale came down to him (they were planing In their upper hfzt! ) and asked him for hia shoe*?, which he - ae he informed him - had won at their

card game. Sty friend wae desperate because there is ao way tc get other

shoes.

!Ie: ^ t- go to work into the mine. Nobody could ielp him and there voe notVng /vcr him left than to give hia the shoes from Ms feet.

Tfcreo; the 5.nr»+-er of the camp ware fed from different kettles. Depend-

ing vvtr.ther they r^ar.hnd the "nam" in their assigned work, tney were fed.

If somebody covl-'ii't '"or ovf.fl.ont reasons, roach the "norm" then he received

!«.;•:: food from the -second kettle. Once he dropped out from the first kettle 196

ho vas doomed to doati;. Having lews physical strength, he produced leas

Gild less until *ic veto fed from the third kettle vhieh meant starvation and slow dying. One day he v-J, i,oo weak ©van to move. l*he cruoinaxn loiev of their way around and hud plenty/food and even sold it.

On every eto^ along the Volga unre and more of these VJU^OVCY" cone

aboard our river boat. It «ac a pitiful lot, alvays hun£5ry, (end i

ve.) With no exception, all of titan, carried lice, ar.O. being used to fight

hard for their survival, thoy beoaate tough and were not particular

about mans to get things done. 197

ARRIVAL Uf A8TRAKHAW

After some ten days our Volga Journey cams to an end and ve were approaching the City of Astrakhan, ^We^ere looking forward with exoiet- ment, to enter this big city. Astrakhan was once a very big export center of fish and its famous Cavlaar. Wo were expecting to find here some shelter and food In order to still our constant hunger. Ve hoped to have a chance to clean thoroughly anck to wash our laundry. We didn't undress In weeks.

We arrived In Astrakhan after nerlly four weeks since we started our

Journey. Coning to a big oity like this is not like arriving In a big city

In the Halted States. There is no use to start looking for a hotel or sons other facilities. Hotels are very few and special permission is necessary to stay there which none of plain mortals could obtain. Those few hotels are only for high officials, dignitaries and eventually foreigners traveling on foreign passports and we belonged to none of those categories. Nobody will let any stranger into his room, first, because he Is not supposed to, and seoondly because nobody has any room or even space to spare. One room

la Inhabited by one or even more families, and a kitchen is cannon to all the, tennants.^o we went to the waiting room of the harbor. There Is an inetitu- ¥ tion on the bigger stations which was well-intended, called resting room for

Motheriand children. As we found out about it, we brought over our wives and cur children. It was nothing else than another waiting room full of dirt with a few benches, and the room was so crowded that we hardly could find some place for our families on the filthy floor. We ourselves^lnstalled in the general waiting room watching in turns, our belongings.

During the night the ladles from our room came running looking for us. -it It turned out that the place was Infested iV 13 •-•* which were crawling all over.

Women were sitting there collecting and destroying them with their fingers 198

and nails. We experienced the sane thing in our waiting room. So ve de- elded still during the night to move out to the open pier. Here In the open air, In the month of October, u a oold wind blowing from the Caspian Sea and with rain pouring down ve made our home for more than a week. Here ve spent our days and nights vith our families and small children. We were not the only ones. There were several hundred families like ours. Those were people liberated like ve, but also russlan refugees from Ukraine and xs&xav. Blelo-

Bussia.

p( Jfoxt day In the morning our first thought was to get clean and to wash.

A bath vas out of question, ve found eome little pond, not far from the harbor.

Ve could at last take off our clothes and wash vlth soap and water. It vas de- pressing to find out that our clothes and our underwear vas Infested by lice.

The first tote time you find lice on you and your children you feel so help*

less and humiliated, so terribly low • There le a feeling of guilt and remorse that it happened to you and that because of you, the children havejto suffer.

After the first frightening discovery on your body of this ghastly ugly

creature, you find always more of them. They are hidden In all seams of the shirt and underwear and around the collar of your suit. Women find them in their brassiere . And after you think you have destroyed them, they are here the next day again. There is no way under those conditions to get rid of them.

The most ve could do van to wash our laundry In soap and vater but this Is not enough. There were no means to Iron our laundry. No spray, no chemical* or

DOT available. Bven when somebody could completely destroy them on himself vlth (

where ve found the first lice on UB, we had them for nearly two years, until

ve finally left Soviet Russia. There vas absolutely, no way to get rid of them.

This problem became more serious later in the south where the lice are the 199

carriers of typhoid. a Everybody developed a very unpleasant habit to check 389 shirt every tine It was taken off. It was dona later rattier mechanically, even when a new clean ehlrt was put on. It took me a long time after to give up this habit vhloh was an unpleasant reminder of those dreadful times. One Incident I cannot forget happened during the tine when we were busy washing and cleaning. On our way back to the pier, we passed a little house with a drinking water-pump in front. The handle was looked with an Iron

chain so nobody could use It. But a very email stream of water was dripping

from the main outlet. X stood for a while with my palms open to collect some water and to drink It. Suddenly a woman cane running from the little house

carrying a wrench and with a fury and a blast of swearing she tightened the pump that no more water should cone out.

I guess that only misery and bitterness could bring people down to such

a low level. t$r heart wan full of bitterness and It was the second time in my life that I eurned a human being.

Astrakhan Is a big olty, once a bag port anft shlppngg center, but somehow I was not Impressed at all. I noticed In all the cities I passed during

our long Journey, small or big, looked somehow alike. I was wondering myself what causes this appearance. It seems that the lack of any stores, with no display or show windows, makee r-'J 'tie?/ similar, normally Hx a city gets

Its character or Individuality from some busy streets, frosi Its shopping center, from the style how contain goods are displayed. But here ere no stores and no displays. *» certain few places are some stores which are most of the time empty and only from time to time, Is bread sold and sometimes also sane cosmetics. art- Should It happen that eorae other useful commodities sold, then It can be lmne- diately recognized by the big line of people standing and others stopping the 200

and asking the usual question, "Shto DAJUT" (what Is sold here?) Those lines developed sometimes Into riots, when on rare occasions, some special food Item is sold. The shop windows contained always Stalin's picture, often also his statue and a display of sausages or ham made from plaster of parls, and painted with colors, Imitating those products which are not available at all.

Another thing whioh makes the cities look similar is the drabness of the street picture. Most of the houses are wooden buildings erected some fifty or sixty years ago, one or two stories high, never painted, and delapldated.

The new houses built In recent years make the Impression of barracks and need already badly, some repair and maintenance.

The cities have also In common a certain monotony In their whole atmosphere. I cams to realise that it Is caused by a complete lack of laughter and gayety even on the part of the youths. There are no bells tolling the hour at certain intervals as we are used to it even in the smallest town and no bells wringing sometimes from churohes, which adds color to every place.

Several people from our group, went to town in order to sell something because we had no money any more. The procedure on such occasions was such as follows. You pick up a certain item which you think you can spare/for

instance, your wife's dress or blouse, a man's shirt, pants or shoes, you put those things on your fore-arm and walk straight ahead, asking for the bazaar or Tolcvjok. As I explained before, every town or city has such town or market place where everything can be bought or sold with no restrictions as to the price as long as it Is your private property and not obtained from a government store. There is no trouble to find the place because everybody knows it.

But what happens is that you are stopped on the street already every few yards by somebody who asks you, "ERODAJOSH"? (are you selling lt9. 201

Sonatinas you can aall It right away not even going to the bazaar, but It la mostly not done because everybody who has something to sell thinks that he will get a better price at the Tolcsok where more buyers are around.

(It Is not necessarily so, and not once I regretted It, because I couldn't get the price which was offered by somebody at the street.) I couldn't get the price which wae offered by somebody at the -street.) The Tolcsok In

Astrakhan Is quite at a distance from the port and we arrived there late. We sold Just enough to buy some bread and some watermellons which were sold direct from boats, by peasants who brought them from their collective farms, (Kolchoz)

We spent the night at the open pier. We and our children slept completely dressed. The men had to take turns in watching over our belongings because the thefts, especially at night became a serious problem. One of our boys became restless during the night and was feverish. We were terrified because sickness under those conditions,even with no roof over our heads, could be a real dlesaster. It turned out to be a cold,only natural, living exposed to the rough sea weather, living practically on a pier.

Hext day we went to the Tolcsok again. On our way I mot a distinguished looking man who stopped me and asked me who I was. I gave him gladly any information he wanted because I had the feeling that it was not plain curiosity.

He told me that he himself Is a mechanical engineer who studied in western countries many years ago and seeing us he recognised that we were westerners and wanted to be helpful. He asked me where we were living awzs and why we are staying here? When he heard that we are living with our families In the open air, he asked me to take him along because he would like to pay us a visit there. Seeing our condition there, he couldn't quiet down. From the expression in his face and from hie horrified eyes, I realized the depths of our misery. CSJlZ

*hen those were hie words, "Xfca^t stay In the city. You see one© it vae the oenter of the fish Industry. Fish and fish products were shipped from here to the whole world. How there is hunger here. We hardly see any fish.

It seems that even fish stay away from us. If I could, I would leave myself." This fine gentleman who under different conditions might have no worries, at least would be able to feed his family, meant what he said.

The next night, while watching over our bundles, I heard a woman screaming. She was running around the whole pier like out of her senses, looking for the thief who stole her suitcase while she was sleeping. She was desperate because also her documents were stolen. It is very hard to realize here what

It means in Soviet Russia to have no documents. There is no other proof that you are a human being and alive, as only by documents. To lose documents It was worse than to lose his shadow. The same night a thief stole the shoes directly from the feet of a man while he was asleep.

So we decided to leave after my wife sold her suit to a young russian woman.|who came to UB shopping. We got some five hundred rubels for our further Journey. In order to get to nlEBHCIBTAHn in central Asia, where we were heading , we had to reach first a city of "GWJEf", another port at the north east coast of the Caspian Sea. This could be done only by ship, leaving right from Astrakhan. This was a very daring adventure because llteratyy thousands of our people and SussIan refugees had the same plan and very few ships were available. We had to make three attempts to board one of those small ships and we finally succeeded. On two previous occasions, once we nearly lost one of our boys in the panic and the second time, in a terrible turmoil, the sultaases were lots. Vy wife finally saw a russian woman sitting on top of them considering them as already here. In both cases, we gave up.

Only after a tremendous effort being pushed back and forth, we found one another and we went back ashore. The third time after better strategic 20

planning we finally succeeded to embark on one- of those Mali ships.

Ve left the once famous city of Astrakhan with no feelings of regret

after seme seven days living in the open air.

CM 00R WAY TO P^ffi" fp "^W^ (fwi *.<-!

This small -vessel wlth7ne»ial oapaolty of from 200 to 250 people

was overcrowded to a point of mere suffocation. There uae hardly a place

even to sit on the floor. The situation became even worse because the

CaspMn Sea is at this time, stormy and nearly everybody got seasick. As

a result the sanitary conditions can hardly be imagined. Fortunately people

being seasick didn't think of any food which wasn't there anyway.

Ve were sailing for two days and nights on this vessel which wee thrown

around by the waves like a nutshell, and ve were very glad when this ghastly

trip was over. The ship couldn't somehow enter the harbor Itself and ve

were transferred lit the open sea to email boate, which brought us to the

shores of Gurjev. It vac the first time here during our Journey whfifth lasted already five

weeks, that ve were not completely on our own. Sane sort of city agency

directed us to some abandoned building and assigned us to a Stolovka where

we could eat BOUO soup and could buy also bread. A Gurjev was the terminal

of the railway connecting the Caspian Boa with Central-Asla-Soviet Republics

and we could therefore from here, proceed with our Journey using the train.

To get into the train in a larger group with lugcage was also a diffi-

cult task. Russian refugepe, legrovcy, (corrective laboi camp inmater) and liber-

ated groups like ours were all over and everywhere. Everybody was trying to

reach the promised land of sunshine and fruit, Uzbekistan. The train consis-

ted mostly of cattle box-care and only a few wooden coaches known In Europe

as third class, ve finally got Into a xx train going Baef and decided to stay 20U

there until it would reach its end station. The place of destination didn't make any difference to us any more. Nobody could tell us where the tfaln vas going, where it would stop and for how long* We met travelling so, thousands of people, rueeiane and people like ours, from different parts of Europe. People became very easily acquainted. There was no regular food supply of any sort. At any atop, somebody ran out to the station or dared even to search the nearby streets for some food to buy. There was always a big risk involved, whenever somebody left the train for a short while. Some- times the train started moving without a signal and nobody knew where the next stop would be* This caused many tragedies. We witnessed the following case :

A father with a son was aboard our train. I knew both of them before the war. One evening at one stop the son ran to the station hoping to get some food for him and his father. The train started suddenly to move. The father seeing that hie son was not coming back, Jumped from the moving train in order to Join his son and not be separated. The son in the meantime seeing the train moving, came running from a different direction and Jumped on one of the cars of the train. The father couldn't see it because it was dark, so the son camb back and the father was left at the station. They lost one another forever. The rainy season already started. Two or three times we had to get off the train and spend a day or two In the waiting rooms. The waiting rooms were crowded and the trains even more. People were sleeping In the train wherever they could, on the wooden benches, over them, (normally a place for luggage) or under them. At one time we couldn't find any other place for our boys but on the floor between the benches, practically on the feet of people sitting there. Lice became a blague again. They could be seen crawling over everybody in long lines, we saw them on our boys too. One night our youngest boy became terribly eick. He got some sort of painful cramps. He was listless. At the next station I ran out, maybe to find a doctor. I hardly reached the 295

•tation vben the train started moving. I had to run back. There were no medicines nor help. I guess a miracle and the Immense motherly love and the prayers of ay wife vho took him in her arms rocking him like a baby, with all her warmth, Drought him back to life.

Wo travelled through "fcAZAKBTAN" and reached finally "TASHtQWf" the capital of the UEBBK- Soviet Socialist Republic. We couldn't stay here because capitals were restricted to ue. We spent a day and night under eons fence until we could get into another train. We didn't undress for weeks again, and we were so Immensely tired. We envied everybody vho we saw entering some house because he has a roof over his head and something which he could call his home.

I envied a dog when I saw that he was crawling In his doghouse.

Xvery change of the train was a calamity. The masses of people, the waiting the anxiety of obtaining scan© bread for the family. In old times there used to be a custom that at every ruseIon station, people could obtain hot water

(KXRATGE) for free. Since .Russians used to consume Immense quantities of tea they were travelling always with their teapot and tea leaves, and at every station they were able to brew tea using the Klpyatok. The kettles were still at every station, but Klpyatok wasn't there under the Soviets. We were seme- times longing for just hot wator. Once during a stop at some station, I saw a locomotive engine going back and forth on tracks while assembling scene freight train. And, I saw hot condense? water Gripping from the outset. I grabbed

some pot and running along the locomotive I collected e pot full of this pre-

olous liquid. It was a refreshing drink for all of us. The mouth tissues were

already so dry and nearly sore. After another several days v/e arrived In the city SAMARKAND, in UEBSOSTAH,

once a residence of the legendary TAMERLAH who reigned here in the lVth Century.

Ve could have stayed here but our group decided to go farther east as far east

as possible. The olosier to the Iranian border, the better. Bo we stayed on

the train actually not knowing where we were going. HUO

After another three day* one morning the train came to a complete halt

at some elde track. The miaghi engine pulled out and left. From the far

distance we could see acme town, nobody was around atazm to inquire where

we were. Some of us left to look around as usual in search of seme food.

The rest stayed, partly sleeping In the coach car, partly standing around.

Suddenly another engine came, was coupled to the front car, occupied by us,

and without any warning before people realised what had happened, started

polling away. In the confusion people were throwing through tho windows and

doors , their suitcases and bundles and xx could hardly Jump out from the

already moving train at the last moment. There were also some children In

the train. The whole thing happened In a matter of a few minutes. When the

rest finally came back, the found all of us very excited, sitting on our

belongings between two railway trucks, we were consoled by tho fact that only

one little suitcase was lost and that the others who left In the meantime

found a Stolovka nearby where we could get something to eat. They also learned

that the town we could see from the distance Is called TCflGAN".

Ve put up our children to sleep in the open air between the two tracks

and we spent most of the night sitting on our bundles. The morning was very

cold and at least we could wash at the hydrant nearby, used for fading the

locomotives. Our boys enjoyed this fresh shower after a long time very much

and didn't tnlnfl the cold morning. Of course we didn't know what to do next. Somewhere around noon a uniformed

nan from ths railroad HKVD Militia cams , maybe on his inspection tour and found

us camping practloally on the tracks. . Ha- asked us for our documents and told

us that we are not supposed to stay hers and with the usual "DAVAJTE UCHOJXTE"

(let's go in a hurry), he asked us to leave immediately. Of course It wasn't

ae simple as he saw it. We finally found out from him that some two miles away

there is a little park where already several hundred people are living and CW(

it is the place for us to move into. We also heard from htm that around the park ve could hire some vehicle* ve could bring our belongings to the park.

As always in such cases two men vent ahead and after some tine came back with /so-called AHBi^ r ,hle UZBEK means of transportation is a cart on two huge wheels hitched to a camel, mule or donkey, with a Uzbek owner called rather informal "MBA?* (something like "Pop") as driver. Our two delegates reported that hundreds of European families live in the park

Just straight under the treee and they met already at the first sight many friends and acquaintances. Ve loaded all our belongings on the Arba and we and our families followed in a big procession looking forward to our next

"home" under the trees of a park in the on town "K0GAN" in UZBEKISTAN .

As we arrived there, we found amongst the hundreds of people, several families we were friendly with before the war and we did not know that they were deported too. It was a strange reunion Indeed. Some changed In such a short time so completely that we could hardly recognize them, (the same

could be said of me to.) I met there a young man whom I used to see for years every day and he didn't recognize me at all. There were no benches In this park and so we put up our quarters, two

families from our group, BJritft under one of the trees. Our long Journey which

lasted nearly two months came so to an end.

From people living here since days, we learned that nobody could go any farther eastward. However, there was good news too. Some ten miles from here

on a side line from the main track there is a famous city BUKHARA where already many of our people took up residence. People were excelling one another in telling stories about this mysterious city and about the comfortable life there.

Of course, we didn't know anything about it, we only recalled that there used HOUP to be a perslan carpet for its colors and quality called Bukahara. 208

We spent the afternoon and the night under the tree v?-.Ich va«

•peolally hatt on BUT ohlldren coneldorlng that It was already the end of October and very oold. Hext day my friend and I aa the heade of our two families, decided to see for ourselves, what the city looks like and if possible to settle there.

BIKEARA

We took the aorning train and after sons hour or so, we reached the terminal of the side line and here It was; Bukhara, the city of Oriental

Romance and Mystery . What we actually saw around the station were dirt roads with flat said huts around. From the far distance some anoient towers and Eupolas in oriental style could be seen. Plenty of people were In the small streets, Uzbeks in their native dresses, Russians mostly uniformed, and people in European dresses who reached Bukhara a week or two before us.

We heard from them that while a few days ago it was possible to rent some room in the homes of the Uzbeks, the oity became by now overcrowded with refugees and our liberate* people and to rent setae sort of housing became a .- from problem. We were also told that Just today an order was issued am the City-

Soviet, that no newcomers would be registered 1. e., admitted to lulauVa.

It was bad news for us but we decided to take a risk and to rent some shelter/ come what may. We were already so tired and exhausted and with the winter approaching, we couldn't think of any travelling any more.

we were looking for a room feverishly all the day, and it became already dark and we still hadn't found anything. Finally through different recommenda- tions and brokers, we finally found some hole of a place on top of a roof In a little Usbek Mud house, in a very narrow winding path, called "KUTOHE" with

a fancy name "ISTORICZYSKU PEREULCK". ( historical lane). The only thing we knew about the room wae that we had to climb up on a chicken ladder to get

there. 209

We couldn't see the roan itself because It wae late In the evening and were there >M. no lights. The owner was an old dignified Uzbek , with a gray heard, who couldn't understand russlan, and with the help of his wife who was sens thirty years younger and his young girl, who acted as interpreter we closed the deal, paid the rent a month in advance, and received from him the key to our"rocB»."

We were the happiest people at this very moment. Imagine after two months of wandering and travelling under those horrible conditions we have a shelter of our own, where we finally will be able to lay down cur heads and to protect our children from rain and wind and from the misery of living

In the streets, tfy friends and I cams back late at night to our "home" under the trees in the park and presented triumphantly the key. Everybody wanted to touch It, whether It was a real key. IHafraaxki

The next day, early In the morning we were ready to move to Biie.. _.. an We hired again Arba and loaded our belongings and our two families followed again In procession to the station. There was a train but nobody was allowed to get In until the last moment. Then the usual "DAVAJTl" Is heard and everybody had to rush In a hurry. Of course we had to run back and forth to get all our belongings and our boys always helpful, were eager to carry as much as they could. I noti ^ d that our younger son was pale and could walk only with much effort and still Insisted in carrying some suitcases. I shall never forget the expression of his face with black rings around his feverish eyes. Nobody realized that he was seriously sick already.

Ve arrived finally at noon in Bukara, took the usual Arba again and gave the Uzbek Baba$ the address . But it turned out that neither kax he and nobody else knew where the little email path is. I didn't know either because somebody brought us over the evening before while dark and for my ecu! I couldn't 210

recall how to get there. We were going around In circles quite desperate when finally amongst so many people, asked for the addrees some email Uzbek hoy led us to the home of our Baba$. \ our two families moved in, Into a room which we saw the first time In daylight. Climbing the chicken ladder ve passed first the flat roof which characterizes every 1 K H peer Uzbek home and from their ve entered the room some ix5 yap&a with a very low celling and vlth a hole in one vail opening into a little dark niche.

The floor was plain mud. The furniture consisted of a small Iron stove with enough space to put a small pot on top of It, a table and two large wooden benches. There was one window and a door opening to the roof. In this room our two families moved in , consisting of four grown ups and three children.

We agreed to put up a common household where all our possessions were pooled together to cover our common expenses. Our sleeping arrangements were as follows! our two boys slept on one bench. The lady from the second family with her little girl,/the other bench, tfy wife slept cm three .cases (every one had a different height) Ify friend and I slept on the floor in the dark niche. It became quite cold and the stove had to be heated frequently and so our room was constantly filled with burning smoke. A small kerosene lamp provided light sparingly for the gloomy roan. Under the ladder leading down was an open pit vhlch was used by all inhabitants of our house for their bodily from or to necessltiea. Ve had to pass this pit every time we climbed up and down/our room. This.pit full of exorements was cleared only once or twice a year.

Next day in the morning, our younger son who was already ymry sick the day before, took seriously. HI. Our boy who was always lively, became a -

'Di and listless child. Hy wife recalled that she met an European Physician three days before while camping in the park in KOgan^and she went out to find him in this strange unknown city full of little streets running like a labyrinth. 212

Inquiring at European people In the street, my wife finally found after tvo hours, him and his family at the opposite end of '-iichara and he was willing to visit our boy. Here Is what happened. My vife deep in her thoughts and anxi©'»3 to bring help to our boy aB quick as possible, couldn't find bar way back to our house. Imagine what was going on In her troubled heart. Here she is bringing along a physician and at the same time she is losing precious time, circling around the place where our house stood* I e- cause she lost her way in those small winding dead end streets. She had finally to go back to the main street and after a new start, she eventually found our home.

Unfortunately, the physician could not recognize the sickness. It was one of those oriental diseases. *>ur European doctor was not acquainted wJBh and there were no Uzbek doctors who might have known this local disease. He thought at first that It was chickenpox, but it was not* .«cause he had it already some two years before. The $oor boy suffered badly. He was so weak from the high tenperature that he could not even move away with his hand, the flies bothering and biting him constantly. After two weeks he slowly recovered by himself. This disease was contageous because after a while the little girl came down with it and suffered similarly.

How we started here the life as free citizens and residence of Sucli**-.. with people consisting mostly of Uzbeks, Tadshik's, Tatars, Russians and of some five thousand west Europeans liberated from ritifferent places of deportation. The first thing to do vasWo gei acquainted where commodities and foods, could be bought and sold on the private market. What were the ccasnodities?

Everything from a rusted nail to a quilt or even an old much-abused Bukara rug. Everything was second-hand and used. Shoes, suits, pants and dresses were tried out on the spot. Sometimes were also some new cotton textiles stolenly offered, but only when the militia was not around, because those commodities came illegally from government stores or factories. 212

There were no new Bukhara carpets because the whole art and skill connected with it Including the original wool and vegetable natural dyes ceased to exist.

Apart froB the little square, where the commodities were offered was a bigger one for food only. The supply in the beginning was plentiful because a part of production surpluses of the collective farms entered the open market to prices not restricted at all but regulated only by supply and demands. According to the Soviet plan economy, namely, every peasant can seal the products which he received from his collective farm as compensation for his work during the year, after deducting all the multiple pay- ments in kind to the Soviet Authorities on the free market.

The bazaar was picturesque and new to our eyes. The Uzbeks with their families brought their products on Arbas , Camels, Mules and Donkeys, donned in their colorful native dresses . They came always In families for several reasons.

At first the older generation didn't understand Russian and the younger acted as interpreter. Secondly, they had to be on constant guard before thieves who were all the time around in big swarms and stole everything they could lay their hands on. Finally, after everything was sold, then they moved to the other part of the Bazaar where they did the shopping of the essentials like , shoes, textiles, etc. for their families. The merchandise of course was not offered by any stores or government enterprises, but by private citizens who offered in this way, part of their belongings for sale.

The Uzbek brought to the market, wheat, dark floor, ground by hand ami on coarse stones, Jlgga)! some sort of crossing between corn and barley. From vegetables : potatoes, onions and carrots. From fruits: very good grapes in different colors and qualities. | Some grapes were as big as little tematoas.) 213

Besides Rale called KIEHMISn and dried Apricots called WCiXK.

rtttMHft Also Hairy products were offered like Milk, a product called

KAYMAK and a semi-liquid with a taste of fermented milk. This particular product was brought In to the market in goat skins.

The milk very much watered down was brought In In cans and sold with a quart measure. There was some sort of *"«»^; control station at the

Bazaar which was supposed to check the fat and water content of the milk but the woman In charge of It was Just satisfied with the large samples which she could take from every can for keep.

The Kayicak was an excellent product. It consisted of the milk skin which old we used to obtain In «xx times when milk was still heated to the near boiling point. The Uzbeks collected those skins and sold them in little fancy china cups without handles called PIALA, according to their size , Che content had to be emptied out In your own container.

Butter was very seldom offered for sale.

Bread was In the beginning, E.. free In the government stores, sometimes even a sort of long white rolls.

Bottled wine was sold from time to time causing serious riots.

Wood could be bought from the Uzbeks who used to bring it in in little bundles, loaded on both sides of the donkey. It was sold not according to weight or cubic measurements but as a load which the particular donkey carried.

The donkey is called in Uzbek language 3BHAK. People were speaking In terms

of a Ishak of wood, or in short of Ishak meaning his whole wood load. The bin' t of wood was quite an intricate business. At first it was very expensive,

secondly, you had to know the different kinds of woodo here. (The tmckxx country

was rather poor on wood). Some was green, contained a lot of moisture and

didn't burn, some was very hard and very difficult to chop, some was rotten

and burned like paper giving no heat whatever. Besides it was also Important 215

At the same time shoes war© sold on the private market for as much aa 400 to 600 rubels, a man's suit between 300 to 1000 rubels. Women's dresses for 200 to 300 rubels. Women*s shoes four to six hundred rubels. Woman's stockings 60 to 30 rubels. Men's shirts 150 to 200 rubels.

I am quoting those figures In order to let you evaluate the actual oost of living In comparison with the Income of the people, their vages and salaries.

This was a situation here only four months after the outbreak of the

War In Soviet Russia and In a place some 2000 miles sway from the front line.

There was no work for us. So, I had to become a frequent visitor at the bacaar to sell every time something alas In order to feed our families.

0or diet consisted In the morning of Coffee-Ersatz (with no sugar) and bread.

For lunch some vegetable soup and bread and for dinner the same thing. In orator to keep up even this diet thousands of rubels were mvmry month necessary.

I must admit that standing on the Bazaar with BODS of my and my wife's and our children's wear, beoame more and more an ordeal for me. To say to yourself, here I am, standing with a shirt or your wife's blouse, displaying

It with your two hands as the only way to keep you and your family alive. So low did you arrive with all your high education and years of study and work.

This is what you have achieved In your life . And here are those strange people coming and touching those things which you or your wife or your children used to wear on their bodies, with their hands, to check whether the quality was good enough for them. I guess the slaves had the same feeling when their bodies were touohed In order to find out whether they were worth buying. It --, was a mixed feeling of humiliation, guilt, of responsibility for events beyond your Influence and control© and a feeling of complete failure. 216

Our day was completely filled with the daily chores. Da the even- log friends ve Bade here used to drop In. There were sometimes fifteen or more people In our room, full of smoke, sitting on suitcases or on the benches, changed to beds, discussing once more our obscure future and recalling old times.

As I mentioned before, ve were living In Buf^hara without permission to do so. This was rather dangerous because the HKVD started round-ups on the street and In the Bazaars. Ve had by all means to obtain some sort of document which would make our residence here legitimate. Ve were told that we could obtain some papers to this effect at the station In 50QAR when we contact the right people with the help of some money.

l$r friends and I decided to make a trip there to get those papers. Ve left at noon time and arrived there in the afternoon. Ve were successful here and received the necessary papers. However, the whole procedure took too long, so we missed the last evening train and had to stay In I&gan all night. I wouldn't write about this little trip when it wouldn't be for this staying-over-night experience. It is interesting to know what happened to somebody who is not an official and doesn't have a special permit to stay in a hotel, when he is compelled to spend over night in a place like Kfrgan which is after all an Important key station on the main railroad line.

At first we intended to spend the night in the waiting room. However, after the last train left everybody inoluding us was thrown out from the waiting room. The waiting room is not for waiting for overnight, we were told by the railroad HKVD. So we took to the street. It was quite cold after all it was already November. Suddenly we noticed an open store in the main street. Ve walked In and luckily enough It was a wine store which sold wine In glasses. Ve ordered some, warmed up a bit and decided to stay here as long as possible. About ten o'clock the store keeper told us to leave because he was 217 closing. 80 ve went Into the street again. After an hour of walking In the empty streets back and forth, we met a man and asked him whether he wouldn't know where we could Just Bit during the night until the morning?

This Is what he told us, "if you promise me to buy me three white rolls, I will show you a place where you can get them for me and you too, and besides you could stay there the whole night. It Is the 7th of Rovember today, the anniversary of the Bolshevik Revolution and In this place there

Is a dance on this occasion and also special food Is sold there." Of course we promised the man the three white rolls and he led us to the place which was a former movie house. Everything was exactly as the man promised us.

There was a dance, with mostly women dancing together, white rolls and some

PXROSBKI filled with meat, a dellcaoy which we hadn't seen In years. The man got his three rolls and left Immediately and we stayed after we bought some rolls for us too and put them In our pockets for our families. There was music provided by a little band, dance and what was the most Important for us it was warm here and we thought we oould stay over night. However, around twelve o'clock somebody got up and made a speech praising the greatest genuia of mankind Comrade Stalin and asked everybody to go home. The cele- bration was finished, the hall darkened and we found ourselves In the street again. Sow we became tired of walking In the street back and forth so we thought of going Into the park where we might find some bench to sit on. We came to the park (it was another one, not the one we stayed with our families some time before.) but not one benoh could we find. They weee stolen and need as fire wood. So we had to walk again in the cold night, sometimes staying

In some house entrances. The night seemed an eternity. Ve were thinking of marching to Bukhara but we heard before that people were robbed and attached at night on the lonely road. 218

It dawned finally. Wo saw from the far distance a man opening a wooden stand (KIOSK) and Baking light Inside. We relished the idea that here is somebody going to sell hot tea in the early cold morning. So we ran over sulck. Row great was our dissapointment when the nan offered instead, cold

oarbonated water andrlciclee, (Just plain frozen water with no sugar and no flavor). Rather indignant we asked the man, what Is the idea, selling us

ouch stuff at dawn on a oold ear }y (November morning? He asked us, "didn't

you hear of the five year plan? According to this plan I have to sell here

a certain amount of carbonated water and lcicklee a day, November or not, // oold or wans weather.

Ve were surely glad when we finally arrived after this lovely night

in Bukhara around ten o'clock in the morning.

I mentioned before that there were ecsaa five thousand people from the

western countries who accidentally or intentionally found themselves In

Buchara. Those were people from every way of life. JEtoyslclaae, Lawyers,

former Manufacturers, Businessmen, Teachers , Artisans and people with no

trade whatever. Some were with their families and some were by themselves.

The latter were the former LAGROVCX, former inmates of the forced labor

camps who were the first to be deported and given prison sentences. In any

other oountry you would assume that under such abnormal conditions, single

people would be better off. A single man has no responsibility he can move

faster with his little bundle and can easier take care of himself. But not

here. Those men were the most miserable lot. In a household even under the

worst conditions, the wife always managed to get at least one hot meal even

a soup,done. The wife somehow took care of the laundry even In the most

primitive way. But those singles had no room to live in, they slept in some

doorways or holes, had no facilities to cook and nobody would wash their

laundry for them* 219

As a result of it, those single men were always hungry, filthy and full of

lioe. This had very tragic consequences as I shall describe later.

Many of the western families had plant* of their belongings to sell and

the Bazaar vas overflooded with goods. Consequently, the supply was bigger

than the demand and the prices dropped considerably. But at thseame tins as

a result of the diminished supply, the food prloee vent up. Because of the

cold winter days and also because of the bad news from the front, the Uzbeks

were hesitant to bring their products to the market and if some of them came

in, the demand vas so terrific that the public literally tore the product

from their hands and paid any price In order to bring saasthlng home. Prices

were rocketing sky high. One kilo of dark flour went up to 100 to 110 rubels

potatoes 50 to 35 rubels, carrots 6 to 10 rubels, watered milk six to 8 rubels

for a quart. And a fehak of wood, So to 120 rubels. In addition to It, bread

became a very scarce commodity. This made our sustenance even harder.

Bread was not available on the free market any more and bread ration cards who were issued. Every person was a resident here was entitled to a dally ration

of 400 grams bread. Every working person to 600 grams. But ration cards didn't

mean bread yet. A hard fight had to be put up every day or rather night to

get bread ration for the family. Life became more and more difficult and so we had to organize our house-

hold accordingly. Our ladles had a hard time to prepare our meager meal , to

wash the laundry, mend our clothing and underwear and to keep our room clean.

This was a full-time, seven days a week Job. The floor in our room wee Just

plain soil and sand. In rainy days the floor vas muddy like the street, and on

warm days it was full of dust. Our children helped where they could but had

to be occupied with reading and writing in order not to let them forget the

little they learned before. Ify friend who was physically not strong enough

helped around the house. It wao his Job to chop the wood In small pieces for

our small stove, and to bring the water from a well ia a short distance from 219^

our home. He also helped the children with their arithmetic, (the

Interest In mathematics of my elder son goes hack to his pleasant and

Intelligent tutoring. ) OesiNtaftvk#B%k

It was my Job to bring the oread against the ration cards, to sell

the belongings to the Sacaar and to buy their our provisions.

low did I have to go about the bread?

Bukhara Is a city spread out over a large area and bread ueed to be sold

in different places. The stores started selling the bread between eight and

nine In the morning but nobody knew which store would have bread to sell.

Sometimes it was one on one end * next day it was a store en the other end

of the city. Cta some days, bread was sold in a store connected with a big

factory and it was far the worst, because In this case the workers there had

priority and we had to wait for whatever was left. At any rate, I had to

leave our hone at ten o'clock In the evening of the day before, end go to all

possible places where bread was normally sold and reserve for me in the long

lines, There was a ritual connected with it. You had to ask, "Kto Boslfdnij" a ft. It means Who is the last/ And when somebody answered my attest Ion and said,

He is, then I had to take a good look at hla and say the formula, "Ja 2a Vaml*

it means, I am behind you. Then you had to wait until the next come and ask

the same question, and I answered hla call and afterwards he pronounced the

sentence, "A Ja za vaml". After I made sure that both men the one in front

and the one next to ue know and would recognize me, I oould leave and go to

the next place sometimes one mile or more away and to repeat the same proced-

ure in front of another store. So I had to run the whole night between several

places to make sure that my piece In the line was still safe and to find out

where the bread will be sold. Sometimes there was trouble beoau.ee some man

who vae supposed to stay behind me, pretended that he never saw me before.

In coses when I was the stronger, I could finally oooupy my place In the line.

If not I have to give up. Around six o'olook In the morning ve finally knew to which place the bread was delivered and here a strong queue vas formed, petrified like a

atone vail. People stood so tight and close one behind the other, that it vas

even difficult to breathe. In this position ve used to stay until the small

vlndow through vhlch the bread was handled , woe opened. Sometimes people

started to fight and somebody vas squeezed out from the line and could never

get back.

Men and women stood in two different lines from both sides of the window.

I remember how once a Russian woman with a little baby on her arm was so

pressed by the others that being afraid that they might suffocate the child,

stepedd out from the line and stood there in tears. I tried to help her to

get back in her place in the line but the russian and Uzbek woman attacked me

and nearly tore my shirt to pieces.

It was an atmosphere of high nervous tension where a quarrel or a fight

could break out at any minute. People were hungry and bitter. Nobody could

Jet off his steam by simple complaining or criticizing this kind of system,

because he would be immediately accused of agitating and centra-revolution.

(Agltacyu dlelajesh? was the question thrown at you.)

So this enormous dissatisfaction and frustration expressed Itself this

way. It was an atmosphere of sheer force, brutality and disregard for his

coMBon man. The device was not "to live and let live" but "either you or I*.

The selling of bread was a very slow procedure. It vas normally handled

by a woman who had to cut the ration cards, figure the amount In grams, to

slice the bread, to weigh It out and to cash the money.

Standing in the line for hours did not yet guarantee that everybody will

receive this alloted bread portion. What happened was that the minute the

bread sale started, suddenly different people appeared in front of the vlndow

and received the bread without standing In the line at all. Those were men In

uniforms, who had no business here whatever because «xka they receive/their 221

bread In their Army unit, but came with ration cords of their friends.

Some officials and same hoodlum who simply didn't care and were strong enough to pick up a fight vlth anybody. All those people pushed ahead of the rest of us and ve just stood there watching them to carry the bread away. It happened frequently that I stood for hours a few inches away from the window with the saleswoman In sight and I couldn't get the bread. And so I used to come back after I left home at ten o'clock in the evening, around noon time the next day, and many times at even two o'clock in the afternoon with the bread portion and even sometimes without. Our families were already waiting sometimes the whole morning for the bread and It was with a heavy heart I had to return empty handed. During all this time of course, I didn't eat and drink anything and what wae worse, I couldn't be found even If needed because nobody Including myself actually knew in advance where I would have to spend the night and to wait for the bread.

I am describing this dally ordeal which lasted for nearly three months

In detail to give you a glimpse of the way of life there for natives or strangers alike, only half a year after the outbreak of the war here.

I feel Justified when somebody is asking me what I did over there to answer, that I fought for my dally bread In the real sense of the word, with my own fists. Standing in the line for hours, pressed In between people, caused another problem. I didn't always bring bread home, but always lice. The lice became not only an ugly nuisance, but also a horror and a carrier of the terrible plague here, the Typhus. As we heard, typhus was a serious disease In this part of Russia all year around even in normal times. But, under those crowded conditions, with filth and starvation everywhere, It spread out terribly.

The first cases among the western people occurred In the winter months of 19M. Incubation period, is seven to ten days ££oa the bite of the Infested louse. *— 111

If somebody was susceptible to the Infection, he caw© down with very high fever and Inhuman headaches. There were no inoeoulations or medicine* available. The crisis occurs about the 14th day and the survival depends completely on the strength of the heart* People were in case of typ^ts compelled to go to the hospital but thin was aura death, because of lack of tho moat primitive sanitary conditions there* People were left without any attention for days, on the floors or even In the corri- dors of the hospital. It vac @-ven difficult for the relatives or friends to recognize and to claim the oodles of the dead* A patient who was lucky enough to be taken care of by his family, had a better chance to survive this epedemic disease. Standing In line for bread In Buchara together with Bussiane, I witnessed how Russian Jews were continuously offended being called by the Russians different dirty nauea. When I asked the Russian Jews why they didn't call the Militia, because according to the Kaaaian law, to offend a Jew for being a

Jew, oalled for a four year seatenoe. (As ttajc explained to us toy tho first

BuMlans we set) they said, there la no use. Tinea have changed and the militia ran would have to be kept very buoy talcing care of all those offences.

Particularly Jews who were refugees from the Ukrainian SBR told UB how they suffered from the Ukrainians, who gave the Battle their fullest coopera-

tion In their atrocities against Jews. In fact they amid, they Intend never

to go bade to tttodoaci Ukraixn even after the war. 223

Being already for some time In Buchara I had a chance fo find out more about the city, the people and the past.

Buchara seen from some distance, makes the impression of a mass of gray flat-roofed huts with an endless labyrinth of narrow alleys called here

KUTCHE'S. This rather monotonous picture is brightened by gleaming towers of Mosques and a beautiful palace in oriental style, decorated with colorful

Mosaics and ornaments. Amongst the colors is a certain deep blue, sort of

Cobalt blue predominant. Incidentally, the secret of this blue was never recorded and can so far, not be reproduced any more.

The several Mosques and the palace were, during my time, used in a small part for some government offices, but mostly as warehouses.

The highest building in Buchara which can be seen all over , is the

Tower of Death, some 200 feet high, (they threw criminals in old times from the top of this towUr.) There are several old gates through which in old times the Camel Caravans entered the city. Arabs ( carts on two wheels ) hitched , usually to a mule or sometimes also to a donkey or camel, are tee only means of transportation on the ttkkk dirt roads here in tt.e city. Sometimes a military truck could be seen leaving a heavy black cloud of dust. In summer the dusty streets were sprinkled wit water carried by man in bags made from sheep or goatskin. During the rain period the dust turned to thick clay and mud.

The Uzbek's are Iranian aborigines of fine and graceful flgufes. I never saw any fat specimen amongst them. T eir skin is of cnocolate color. The

Uzbek's are Moslems by religion. Since the Soviet regime they do not practice their religion openly and I never saw any one praying outside, as it is so characteristic of the other oriental moslem countries, ntt wnere the men are praying outside, wherever they happen to be, at certain hours during the day, washing first their feet, hands qnd face, and spreading out a little 22i,

rug In front of thorn. I mint also nay that while living with them under one roof I never sav them praying indoors either, hut they definitely keep their faet periods and stick to their own family traditions and customs,

for instance in their very elaborate form of greetings, their hospitality,

their weddings and funerals.

They are dressed in a white linen garment which looks like a long shirt

end white linen pants reaching nearly the ankles. It is Interesting to

notice that they wear those white pants in the same manner as the girls are

wearing here the Jeans; the left leg shorter and the right of it, longer. On

top of it, they wear a very colorful cotton padded gown (iiThlue, whltt4 is

their favorite color) kept together around the waist line by a colorful ker-

chief of turkish design. As head wear they use silk r'Till caps with beauti-

ful artistic embroideries which in am times , genuine gold threads were used.

In winter time, their kerchiefs normally used as a sort of belt, are wrapped

around this skull cap with a certain artistic fantasy.

The women are dressed more or less the same way. Of course being Moslems

the women are considered inferior, but the Soviets encouraged their emancipa-

tion. The unmarried girls put up their hair in numerous little braids. After

their marriage their hair has to be covered with the same skull cap as the men.

Buchara was in old times an independent powerful EMIRATE and became only

in 1&70 at satellite of tfzarlst Russia.

After the Bolshevik revolution the Emirate of Buchara maintained itself

as an Independent state for nearly three years. The last Emir of Buchara,

SEID MIR ALIM, escaped at the end of 1920 to Afghinistan (Kabul) with MB

harem and tremendous wealth* The fialrate was declared in March 1921 as the "Hew Soviet Republic of

Buchara" Joined the Soviet Union in 1924 and in 1925 was declared ae> the

Uzbek Soviet Socialist Republic. 229

As an Autonome Republic It hac^its own Ministries, its own government and its own Communist party, but the Uzbek1 o occupy the high government positions only nominally. It Is the sane fiction as I noticed it already In the recently created West-Ttoalaian Socialistic Republic The real power lies la the hands of Buss lai^ who don't have high sounding tltleaybut defacto are running tho country on orders from Moscow. The Uzbek's presented to the out- aide world as holders of high office, to prove that every nation has its in- dependence and autonomy, are only figure heads.

Tho Uzbek's in the olty are working an minor government jobs but are mostly occupied as workers, weavors and dyers in tho textile factories, mnu- facturing those colorful fabrics mentioned before. They work also in a few stocking and underwear factories here. Those factories have bery fancy names &A^

Trust, or Combines, but In fact are small primitive shops compared with the

Textile Mills here. The production of the so-famous Busbare Rugs ceased to exist.

The Uzbek's are very good farmers and the soil is vary fertile giving two crops a year. Buchara itself is the center of a big Oasis. They still maintain the old Irrigation system. Little water channlee/called here Aryk's/are distributing water throughout their villages and farms. The system Is primitive but proved to be very efficient. They cultivate mostly cotton, picked later by hand, Jigaix, a grain described before, vegetables, and wonderful fruit like grapes, aprioost and peaches. The high quality is due mostly to the soil, skill, climate and hard work. In some villages called Klslak'e^heeps are raised. Those are the"!Karakul" sheeps froa whioh the imported Persian Lamb Furs are coming from.

The climate is better than In the most Middle East countries,- the summer la hot and lasts from April until October. The heat is dry. The nights are cool and pleasant. Tho fall is short with heavy rains? The winter lasts until March, is quite cold, with no snowfall. 226

During the hot summer months, Uzbek's don't work in the fields In the afternoon, but start again at sunset.

Buehara consists of very old and ancient buildings. Daring the Soviet

Begins only a fev new buildings were erected. The nicest modern building Is occupied by the HK7D. The population lives In clay huts, with quite spacious rooms. It seemed to as that those huts made of clay mixed with straw and fortified with a fev wooden planks, are fitting best In the prevailing climate.

The roofs are flat and it is not seldom that the rooms are flooded during the rainy season. The Uzbek's still own their own little houses and in all times, they used to have their winter and summer quarters.

As the old BsbaH's used to tell us, the Uzbek's were in old times, big merchants engaged In trade In the whole middle east. On Camel caravans they used to export Rugs, Cotton, Dried fruits, Spices and trade/against other commodities. They were wealthy people. They are still around so-called

CARAVAH-SAHAY'S on main roads, sort of Inns where the camels rested while the merchants talked business or listened to jB»toyr1**es while drinking tea with

Kishmlsh (raisins) but there are no merchants any more. Here and there small caravans are passing by with a leading camel ringing Its chimes but those are the ones ifi^^e deliveries of the farm products from the collective farms to the government warehouses. There is little wealth left In their homes from the old times. They had to sell out too in the past years in order to keep alive. Ro furniture can be seen. A few trunks only and a few low stools. They sit with legs folded under them and rest mostly on the floor covered now and then with old rugs. They

like quilts covered with their colorful textiles and the amount of them Is a

criterion of their wealth. During the day they are piled up In a corner of the

room. The quilts are used Instead of beds. 227

The Uzbek's don't believe in ovens and stoves. During the cold winter days and evenings they keep warm by holding their bare feet in a small pit, usually in the middle of the room where charcoal Is burning on the bottom of the pit. (they alvays take off their shoes or rather sandles entering their hones). The rest of the body up to the waist line Is covered with those quilts mentioned before. During the day they sit around the pit, at night they are laying around and aleep.

They drink tea (they call it CZOJ Instead of Russian CZAJ - at any time- they prefer the green tea - and being very hospitable, they offer it to the visitor In a very gracious manner giving him the first cup. It is a great offence not to accept it. The tea is drunk from beautiful china cups with no handles, hand painted In beautiful colors and lines with the famous Cobault blue as the basic color. Those cups are called PIALA'S. While drinking they keep the cup

In both palms. Those cups arc remnants of an ancient art which vanished. Some pieces can sometimes be bought from an old BabaJ at the Bazaar. It is the last thing a Uzbek Is selling.

(My eldest son sold a part of his stamp collection he was very much attached to and bought his Mommy such a one for her birthday. We still keep it ae a family souvenir.)

Their way of greeting is very graceful. An Uzbek places his hand on his breasts and bows courteously. The Uzbek's have very nice eating manners and habits. They seldom eat by themselves, always In company, ttader the prevail-

ing conditions they usually eat Bread and drink tea. They prefer their own bread baked In disk form (called "I^PIOSKY") and being Moslems they don't

cut bread with a knife but break It with their fingers in small pieces. For

such a frugal meal two Uzbek's sit down or rather rest on their folded legs

spread out on the floor or on eome street corner, the pretty kerchief between

them, break the bread In pieces and fHI the cups with tea from a u+*i 228

The tea they buy from a tea house called CZAJ KHAHA which le always somewhere around. Ae a luxury they eat a few raisins, (Klshmish) with the tea.

(One kilo of Klshmish wae at that tine 50 to 60 rubels.) While eating they are engaged in a vivid conversation and are careful that one shouldn't eat more than the other.

The Uzbek tongue is closely related to Persian. ID recent years the

Uzbek's adopted the latin script in place of the old difficult Arabic*

Many Tartars also live in Uzbekistan. Their language is similar to the

Uzbek and they understand one another while speaking in their own language.

The Tartars are also Moslems but what a difference In culture, tradition and manners between those two nations. Tho Tartars appear coarse and very primitive in the presence of the Uzbek's.

There are several thousand Jews In Uzbekistan, known in the Jewish world as Bucharian Jews because most of them lived in Buchara. (Some of 'them

emigrated a long time ago to Palestine and occupy a separate section in the

old city of Jerusalem known as the Buchara Quarter.) They pride themselves

that they are decendants of those Jewish prisoners who after the destruction

of the first Temple in Jerusalem, were brought here by Babylonian Kings.

Their residence here is more than 2000 years old. Their cemetery which is one

of the oldest In the world is of great historical value.

They look, dress and behave exactly as the Uzbek's and speak of course

their language. Some of them speak also Hebrew. Also Persian is very common

among them. They used to have their own Synagogue and maintained a Rabbi

called here KHAKHAM who left when under the Soviet Religious Spiritual leaders

were persecuted. By pure chance, I walked one day Into a house inhabited now

by private people, which happened to be the summer residence of the KHAKHAM.

The main room was beautifully ornamented with Hebrew sentences laid out in

colorful mosaics with the original blue color predominant. 229

The Bucharan Jews assembled on Saturdays and all Jewish Holidays privately and prayed according to the SEFBARDIC ritual. Their former synagogue vaB used later by us as a school and being on the school oamittee, I was once led by the caretaker who lived in this building, to an attic and he showed me some 70 Torah-ScroHs hidden away from previous times. They all observe all the rituals Including the Dietary laws and have laymen who are

in charge and in control of the observance of the old traditions. Of course the young generation is drifting away from every religious practice like the

Uzbek's used. They are teachers, clerks in government offices, barbers, boot- blaoke and shoe repair and textile workers. They also Indulge in some primate trading in meat.

3h Buchara a city of some 80,000 population there was no Movie. Ho re-

laxation whatever. Only the radio loud speakers, with their propaganda talks

in Russian and Uzbek, were blasting from the street corners day and night.

Russian and some Uzbek newspapers were sold every second day or sometimes

twice a week. I noticed a great interest for newspapers and any time the

newspapers arrived there was a line of people buying the papers. I was wonder-

ing why everybody was buying so many papers as he could get. (nonsally one

copy was sold to a person) and why some people not knowing the language), bought

even Uzbek papers. For an onlooker it might have made the impression that

people are very cultured and therefore very much Interested in the current events.

This however was not necessarily so. The reason for it was simply the need

for paper as such and people were not interested even to look at them and

therefore the language didn't matter.

The smokers cut the paper in little pieces Just enough to roll them into cigarette whenever Makhorka was available. The smokers had even a preference for some papers because, according to them, they tasted better. I know that pane discriminated smokers preferred for this reason, for Instance, the Fravda better than the Izviestje. 230

The newspapers wore aloo used as packing material in pharmacies for pulverized medicines, and the physicians need then to write their prescript- ions on them. They were also used for makeshift envelopes. In schools newspapers were used instead of note books and the exercises were written between the printed lines. In cases when newspapers were not available, books were bought - no natter what language and what content - torn apart and the printed pages used for the same purpose.

Speaking of cigarette there were no ready wade cigarette available.

Smokers were satisfied with Makhorka and even this sort of tobacco von difficult to get. It was sold only in the free market at the Sasaar as a mixture of dried frftort loaves, straw and oone tobacco leaves, cut and shredded in little pieces. Makhorka was sold from an open small linen pillow case and as a standard measurement was a glass like the small beer glasses In which beer le served at the bars here. Such a glass full of Makhorka was sold for 6 to 8 rubels a glass. There was no paper bags to put it in, the purchase was done by paying the money first, the customer offered hie open Jacket or trousers pocket, the seller Just poured the content of the glass In and the buyer strolled happily away. To offer somebody Makhorka far a cigarette was a tremendous sacrifice and was very seldom done. The people didn't even dare to aek for it. The most they could ask for was a piece £^ the newspaper. (Bumazka U Vas Yest?)

To smoke a cigarette in public was a brave deed. Every few minutes somebody came up to ask Just for one puff. Several people were always waiting far the butt which naturally was very small because people were smoking with such economy that they nearly burned their lips. Remembering that I am always impressed with the fact that people are discarding sometimes even half of a clgarett and nobody is rushing for them. A full cigarette laying cm the street 2J1

aa I often can see here, would cause a major riot there.

The ladies omoking the Makhorka caused considerable danago not only to their lungs but also to their dresses. The tiny particles of an undefined

•cmsthlng which the Makhorka consists of, had no cohesion whatever and eo while burning* little sparks used to fall all over and when not very careful

burned holes In the women's dresses.

Beginning somewhere from June 19&2 the situation changed considerable*

At first there was an improvement in the bread distribution. Holders of

bread ration cards were assigned to certain stores and it was not necessary

to run around the whole night in order tc find a store which would sell the

bread against the ration cards. It was not a perfect solution because bread

was not always available at a certain tine. Sometimes in the Horning , eme-

tines In the afternoon, even in the evenings and scsnetlime not at all. In

such case, the bread was supposed to be given for two days the next day but

quite frequently a days ration got lost somewhere on its way. FaraleU to It

bread was always sold on the bread market. The rations were insufficient only

lfrOO grans per person and in addition the bread vac full of chaff and being

sold still warm, contained a high percentage of water* Bvery bread seller

had its way how to add weight with his hands while placing the bread on the

scales. A few decagraxaa free every cuetcner resulted in a big surplus for

the seller. Nearly everybody had to resort to the black market breed which was sold

at the price Iff^"—"• between JO to JO rubels per kilo depending on the supply

and demand* On days when nc bread wa» distributed, the price was always of

course higher. The official bread price was 90 Kopeks or rather one rubel

for \ kilo* (Nobody cared about the email Adas change, which had nc value

whatever). The black market price for bread was at least JO times higher. 232

To be fair, I hove also to report that also sugar ration cards were distributed 200 grans per parson for a full month. However, during the nearly two years only once sugar was distributed and two or three times ginger bread cookies instead. Having not even the value of the paper were printed on, the eug ar ration cards vero later on, not oven distributed any more. Sugar could be bought at the black market far 300 to 330 rubels per kilo. Some sixty dollars through to the official exchange rato.

Bone people established once again from here contact with their American relatives who started sending packages Immediately. People received letters and cables from America referring to those packages but unfortunately none of them arrived. It seems that the public here was misinformed about the fact that the Russian custom duty had to be paid in American dollars right here in the USA to the Soviet Institution called 3MT0URIST. Those duties were very high and depending on the goods exceeded frequently several times the purchasing value of the package. Apparently, the Soviets changed at that time their policy In this matter because the first American packages which were cent from here In 1<&0 and in l° Al arrived, without any trouble at all* /x Two years later I found thousands of those American packages - amongst them also some meant for my family - in the warehouses of the Polish Bed Cross

In Teheran (Iran) mostly damaged and eaten up by rats. Those packages which were not let in by the russlans because of unpaid customs duty, were handed over by the Iranian and Allied authorities to the Polish Bed Cross just for storage. Another thing was also done by some Americans for their deported relatives. They were encouraged here by the Soviet institutions to send American dollars through American banks with the understanding that we in Soviet Russia could purchase the necessary goods on a gold parity. There was onoe at a time when the Soviets needed gold badly, a Soviet institution which exchanged 233

gold (coins and gold, valuables? like rings, brooches, etc.) weighed In grans against food figuros also ja gold parity prices* What actually happened was that the American dollars wont to the Amtorg here (a soviet russian procurement office) which could buy here for hundred dollars, for

instance, seme thousand pounds of sugar or thousand pounds of white flour.

We, Instead were paid by the Goasbank in Buohara 520 rubele, for hundred

American dollars and for those 520 rubels ve could buy exactly one kilo of , v-rrmt Pfiitftrg rrtatre.r' sugar and two~£Ilo of dark floWi Or if you preferred four kilo dark flour

and ten kilogram carrots on the private market. It is what ve exactly bought

for the hundred good American dollars which were sent to us several times in 19^2.

And even if we needed badly those four kilos of dark flour, we had to stop

those transfers because we cou&d not stand the idea that our relatives here

who had to work very hard for those hundred dollar remittances, should be

cheated and sucked this way.

Other families who were in the same position stopped it too. And Home

even refused to take the rubels and asked that the money should go back. Of

course nobody found out and nobody could check whether the American dollars

were really paid back by the Soviet authorities here to the benefactors.

In the meantime the Typhus fever epedaaic was raging like a plague.

Lice were all over and on everybody and nobody knew when he would be struck

by it. There were no taedicinos or rsiriLattlassba. Glucose and sugar ie needed

to otrengthen the heart but there was none. The starved bodies couldn't build

up any assistance. More and more death oases occurred every day. The cenetary

was filling up rapidly. The corpses were carried in wooden open boxes covered

only with a blanket and then discarded at the cemetery bringing back the box

and the blanket. 23U

The first oases of death by hunger as a result of long starvation, happened. Death of hunger doss not occur because somebody la not eating

for several days. After even several days of hunger a man can recover by a

slice of bread or some water. But If a body starves for a long time. It

aauses heavy dysentery and the stomach simply cannot take In anything any

more even if the best food Is provided. And so people were found dead in

the streets or some other places with money or valuables in their pockets •

Because, after the bloody dysentery started, the stomach couldn't digest

any food any more.

The Death from Typhus or from hunger, was staring at us from every street

corner. Some human capotes profited from It. I remember a real macabre

case, when a woman approached me and another man In the street, and asked

for our help because not far from here a man was dying and some young hood-

lums started already undressing him and stealing hie clothes from his body

while he was still alive. We ran to the Indicated place, the men wae al-

ready dead and the human thieves disappeared already with bis clothes and

his shoes. Death and hunger were everybody's companions. I and my family were al-

ways hungry. The feeling of hunger Is terrible and very difficult to de-

scribe. It is different from the feeling of hunger which somebody has far

a dinner, knowing that the table is set for him and in no time he will be

satisfied with all sorts of delicious dishes. Es has a constant feeling of

hunger and you know that it will remain with you today, tomorrow and the days

after that. You get up and go to sleep with the seme feeling of hunger. The meager

mealo you are taking In In the meantime soothe this feeling for a short time

and then it starts nagging at you again. The stomach gives you a feeling of

emrtlness, the pulse In your head Is beating loud causing a sort of heacaohe

and it seems as If your whole blood stream is yelling for food. YoaChavo the 235

Ton have the feeling that you could eat stones only to have something to fill the emptiness of the stomach. In fact I ate something like stone.

There were sometimes linaeed-meal-cakes available which remained after the flaxseed is pressed and are used as feed for cattle. It contains all the need-bails, dirt, sand, little stones and all this is of course indigestible.

The nourishing value are only the few percent of raw linseed oil which couldn't be squeezed out even under high pressure fr» the cakes. I used to Mk eat it until I got sick.

The bread ration for our two families was fairly and equally divided

into seven parts, and it had to last for the whole day and for a part of the next day, because we couldn't depend on the bread in the morning. Seme-times

it was even not before the evening and there was nothing else to eat.

tyy wife pretended very often that she is not hungry and give away a part

of her bread portion to me and to our two boys. The boys couldn't sleep some-

time at night because they were too hungry. My vife always managed to spare

sometimes a bowl of soup and to send it to a lonely young man a former "lagro-

riete" who became attached to us during our wandering and who xi&c now recover-

ing from Typhus. It was a time of the great death and great hunger. The sunny country of

Uzbekistan with all its products and fruits didn't do us any good.

I knew two men who were so hungry that they lured In a starved dog from

the street and killed him. They ate him at night. The next day the both of

them were* found dead. I knew of a woman who In one week lost her husband and three children,

all dying of hunger, (ironical enough they owned a restaurant before the war.)

She survived with three children, two boya and a girl. The younger boy used

to bring the bread from the store, (kts dmy he was very hungry so he ate up

part of the bread ration on hie way home. The elder brother beat him up for it, 236

The next time, being always hungry he couldn't resist and control himself and ate the bread again. After he realized what he did he was afraid to go

home. Be never cane home any more, he ran away somewhere. The desparate mother started looking for him and Inquiring about him. After many months

the poor woman found out that the boy died In an orphanage several miles

«p away.

We became acquainted with her after this tragedy and learned to know her

as a wonderful person. She became so poor that she had to walk barefoot

in the cold days because she had no shoes but at the same time she always

found somebody who was still poorer than she was and tried to help him. (She

lives now In Israel, happy with her two survived children and the little she

has.)

I remember how she once picked up from the street a girl she had never

known, wrapped In rage and swollen from hunger and brought her to her hole

of a place, nobody else vstt would have done it because bringing in a person

like this meant to bring In lice and Jeopardize his own life. She washed and

cleaned her, shared with her the little she herself had to eat, and with the

help of my wife, got some clothing for her. She provided for the girl until

she became a normal human being again and kept an eye on her later after she

started a life on her own. &>U-v) People were practically selling out everything in order to buy something

to eat. It was the only way to survive and to pay those fantastic black or

legal market prices. And so you can see suddenly and otherwise a respectable

man or woman, walking in the streets literally barefooted. They didn't have

anything more to sell so they decided to do without shoos. After all for a

pair of shoes you could get at that time, with 800 to 1000 ru els, and for

this money he could live for another week or so. People used to think in

previous times that every decent person should have several shirts. But would 237

It be no utterly wrong to have only cane shirt and to sell the root?

The russlans had only one shirt and somehow they go on living, eo were people reaeoning. Eventually people sold out their last shirt and the sane reasoning vent on conoaralng the last shirt. And no you could finally eee respectable people walking around without a ahlrt on their body and

just covered only with a Jacket or what have you* This made them of course

eaiiier prey for the Typhus lice. Hobody wee thinking what next, and about

the fact that under even normal conditions prevailing here, none of us would be able to buy himself back a pair of shoes or a shirt. It was a life

from day to day, or rather from hour to hour and people became somehow

fatalistic.

It In only logical that the question could be raised, how did the others

live and what did they do In order to sunrise?

Of coanrae the Uzbek's and the Russian's here wave exposed to the same

lice a& we end their were many victims among them but to a lessor degree

as among our people. Many of them had already typhus in previous jeers and

they were therefore immune against the infection and the rest built up with

the years a greater resistance.

The Uzbek'c living here had their hones and shelter. They did some

trading on the side, slaughtering illegally sheep and selling meat or bringing

in 60003 products from relatives or friends in the collective farms nearby

and selling them with a profit. The wages from their work covered only a

ana 11 percentage of their lining expenses. The Uzbek's were also compelled

to coll from time to time whatever was left from their heirloom and previous

wealth. Of course not all Uzbek's had the same opportunities and the same

reeourcefujmnsa and ingenuity. Those who had not starved like many of us. 238

The Russians living hero either from before or as refugees had a special ARS VIVENDI, acquired after many years of experience under the

Soviet regime which I will describe at a later time.

Those were unusual times and also unusual things happened* The following event could be considered as only short of a miracle. I must tell about It In more detail as normally Intended, because this event had a heavy Impact on our lives and shaped to some degree our future lives.

It also sheds some light on the Russian way of life.

My brother-in-law, (my wife's brother) an energetic young man, fleeing

from the Nazis with us, came together with us under the Soviet occupation

In LVOV. He spent here with us several months but somehow he couldn't stand

it any more. He decided to cross the Roumanian border and chose as a cross-

ing date the 1st of May, 19^0, which is a Soviet Rational Holiday. The

Russian Roumanian border (previous Polish Roumanian) was very tight already

at that time and there were very little chance for success but he was so

desperate that he wanted to take the great risk figuring that on this 1st of

May, the russlan guards celebrating this ruwsian holiday, with the usual

drinking might relax a bit. So he went Into the night with only a napsack

as his luggage, followed with our heavy hearts and tears because such a de-

parture could easily be a goodbye forever. We didn't hear from him for several

weeks. One night a man came Into our home and In secrecy and high conspiracy

brought a message from him. It turned out that being only a few yards from

the border and ready to dash over, he was caught by a trained bloodhound which

kept his leg with his teeth while alarming the patrols. Those dogs are helping

the russlan REVD to guard the border. He was captured, passed sevmal prisons

and finally he wound up in a bigger prison where he met the man who brought

ue his message. The man himself who was set free In the meantime, asked us 239

for money which will enable him to get my brother-in-law out of prison.

It was ead news Indeed but at least we knew that kfc he was alive. We gave the nan the money he asked for hut it turned out later that the nan was an informer who as such, was set free and visited our family only to extort money. He learned about us from our brother-in-law who while being together in prison took him into his confidence and told him about our family.

Since we were deported in the meantime we didn't hear from our brother- in-law direct or Indirect any more and we didn't know what happened to him.

After nearly a year we were informed by our family that a short message came from him from a hard labor camp in Siberia In which he asked for dried bread (SIKBABT) and Makhorka. Ve were at that time still at the Foslolok oolleoted eome dried bread and a few packages of Makhorka and sent the package and a letter under the indicated address. Ho answer came and no package was either confirmed or returned.

The German-Soviet war broke out In the meantime and there was the end of any exchange of messages. Hy wife was desperate and very worried about the fate of her favorite brother. He was a very fine chap always eager to be helpful to everybody.

Another year passed by. Ve were already six months in Buchara. Our household was so organised here that my wife spent most of the time at our home, taking care of the common household duties and trying hard to prepare some meal. I did the running in town looking for some food to buy or trying to sell something from our belongings.

One day my wife insisted that she wanted to go to the Bazaar for a change* dot knowing the right direction she got lost in the small winding paths (Kutche's) and at one crossing while hesitating whether to go to her right or left, she saw a small group of lagrovcy going the other direction 240 and suddenly one of them screaming and crying, took her In his arm. It was her brother. One second earlier or later they would have missed one another and they might have never met again. Ity wife brought him of course

Immediately to our home and when I sow him entering our room, I nearly fainted.

This miraculous reunion was a tremendous shook for all of us. It turned out that he didn't even know that we were deported and that vo were in Soviet

Russia. That a brother should find his sister In this vast mass of land, among millions of wandering people, on a street corner In Buehara at the place never visited by her before, where she practically got lost Is a miracle

Indeed.

Bare Is hie story as told by him:

After he was caught by the dog, he was held prisoner In a cellar for several days together with another captured man who never revealed his

Identity but from his attitude and remarks he gathered that the man was a high ranking polish army staff officer who also tried to escape across the border more or less at the same time. After a tew days they were removed each one to a different prison but this short acquaintance mas a fateful event for my boother-in-law as It turned out some two years later.

The Soviets tried very hard with different means even with physical mistreatments to exact a confession that he was a spy, but with no success.

He was sentenced later to eight years In prison and sent to different hard labor camps until he finally wound up in Xblyooa.

The mere mentioning of Kolymoa causes chills to everybody who knows anything about the Soviet Prison camps. The Kolyma area is located in the foremost north eastern corner of Soviet Russia, south of the East Siberian Sea.

The inmates of Kolysna are working in gold mines and never come back. Robody leaves Kolymma alive. The prisoners are held incommunicando (Bez Raspieku).

Bo letters, can be written. Since nobody knows about them being here, therefore no letters are coming in. 2kl

They are practically dead for the family and the outside world. There 1B a central offloe of labor-Camp Administration In Moscow called "GOULAG" but

In oaee of an Inquiry either no answer 1B given or the Interested person Is

Informed that the prisoner In question Is unknown and not In their files.

It was only due to the Sikorski-Stalin pact that the few mnmates of

Polish origin were set free and amongst them my brother-in-law.

The Inmates In Kolymma are mostly men who held once very high positions

In the Soviet's Hierarchy who were purged, as a result of Ideological errors.

They were former Commissars and Ministers. Amongst them was a former Uzbek

Minister with whom my brother-in-law became friendly there. He gave him a message directed to his family written with his own blood and a needle, on a piece of linen torn from his shirt. My brother-in-law was supposed to hand it over In person to his family, in Uzbekistan. Unfortunately through unhappy accidents the message never reached the family. It took him several weeks to reach by ship Vladivostok, through the Sea Okhotsk with Kamchatka to the east. While on ship he acquired as a result of Palagra, a vicious infection on his hand and he was in danger of losing his arm so an Immediate operation was necessary. Having no instruments and no anaesthetics the operation was carried out with a pen knife. Because he was not sure whether he would survive the infection and the operation, keeping in mind his promise given to the Uzbek friend, he handed over the "letter" to a colleague of the same polish group who went ahead of him while my brother-in-law stayed in some place recovering from his sickness. This colleague who reached Buchara later told us that during some roundup by the russlans, (this was a frequent russlan institution called Povlerka) he got scared that they would find this discriminat- ing letter and threw it away In a gutter. My brother-in-law was very sad when the the man told him this. This was/unfortunate fate of this message written in a strict sense with the blood of the poor man's heart. 2U2

It took my brother-in-law several month* to reach Bukhara with a group of the Lagrovcy, who Just rallfed around him during hie lone Journey. They were attracted by hie strong personality, physical stature,[ 6' 2" tall,] and his natural leadership. The reason why they came to Bukhara was because there veee rumors along the way that the new Polish army which they wanted to Join

Is putting up here Its headquarters. After my brother-in-law arrived with the

group here he found out that the rumors were not true , that there was not a trace of the Polish Army at that time In Btfehara. Be was Just on his way back to the rail station, with only three vubels In his ftoctet, when he met on the

corner of one of those little streets, his sister. Of course we begged him

to stay with us. He did It after he brought his group which decided to look

farther for the Polish headquarters, to the station and bid them farewell.

Hy brotherrin-law described only briefly his life in the last two years

as repeated by me before. But he never wanted to talk about his experiences

in Kolyoma. Only during the night while asleep he used to sigh and to scream

loud, his face in pains. It seemed that his terrible experiences came back

at night to him as a nightmare.

During this time I couldn't fall to watch the russian army units who had

here their training center. Young men eighteen years old and men in the forty's

arrived here in great masses for training. Their uniforms were poor and shabby.

Some of them had no shoes and in a company unit marching to the training fields,

were only a few rifles. The rest were carrying long sticks simulating rifles

for their exercises. The military discipline improved from the time I saw the Russian Army In

1939 after the occupation. At that time you could see soldiers pushing high

ranking officers who lined up in Queues when they intended to get ahead of them.

Now since the shiny Xpulette similar to those used by the officers of the old

fzarlst army were introduced, saluting the higher ranks became obligatory. 21*3

Also a new system of feeding the army wan Introduced. While the Soviets prouded themselves that In the red army as a peoples army everybody was fed from the same kettle, now three masses were established, one for soldiers and non-ocamlsBloned officers, one for officers up to Captains, and one from

Major rank and up. Of course there was a big difference in quality between

those three mess halls.

The military trucks were old and In very bad shape. The driver had to

stop frequently for emergency repairs. Gasoline mas In critical supply. Many

of them run on gas generate^ from the CIUBEX, little wooden cubes which we

used to make while working In the woods. There were no spare parts. The

trucks were running with worn out tires without any reserve. Frequently one

could see a truck running on three tires and one wooden wheel as substitute.

But there was a lot of singing. Singing was compulsory while marching. It

always amused mo to hear the very popular military marching song "MOSCVA MQJA"

(my Moscow) full of praise of the great wonderful city, which I am sure - only

a few of them will be able to see in their life time. RUBBIS is supposedly a

land of Demoodacy but to entfcr Moscow is not so simple as to buy a ticket and

to get on a train, like somebody who decides In the morning to go to Washington

and to stay there as long as he wishes. It Is more than that.

The situation changed enormously when the first American lend-leaee ship-

ments arrived. The Soviet soldiers got their rifles and the GI'B shoes never

here seen before. (Some soldiers sold them lauedlately at the Bazaar). The

American newest trucks, still shiny with their serial numbers still on, arrived.

Seeing them wan like meeting an old friend in a strange foreign country. They

brought with them for uo a breath of fresh air. It seemed like every truck

would bring for everyone of us a personal message, to be patient and not to

give up hope. 2kk

Ycu wanted to touoh them with your own hands to make euro that they wore real and came really from America. In a way I pitied them.

Their fate was similar to ours. Coming from the same assembly line

some trucks could stay in America being taken care of properly and

running on wonderful highways and some were shipped here to be handled

with rough hands, and to be neglected, to starve on small gasoline

rations of low quality and to break down in its early years on one of

those dirt roads with no end.

Speaking of the army, I find it worthwhile to mention an additional

fact. I notice on certain days of the month a tremendous crowd of women

camping in and around the post office. They were Just sitting there and

waiting for something. I found out that those women are the dependents

of their knm husbands or sons in the army and were supposed to get on

the first of each month an allowance of one hundred rubele. Such a matter would be quite simple here where the dependents would receive their check

delivered to their home but it Is rather complicated in Russia. They had

to go to the post office and wait for the money which wasn't there. So

they wait until somebody comes In to mall some money which on the other

hand happens very seldom. There are no business transactions in Russia and no money orders Bought. And if this happens onoe or twice a day, then

everybody is rushing to the little wtedow because the post master might

divide the money between a few waiting persons. The people here learned to be patient and not to complain or revolt and so one day after another

passes by and the women are still waiting. Maybe on the 10th of the month,

or even later, the money finally arrives from the Goes Bank and the vnsen

finally get their hundred rubels for which exactly one kilo of dark flour could be bought.

A new innovation was introduced. People who wanted to travel by 2U5

train from one place to another, had to go to the bath house for disinfection. The idea vas to destroy the lice ae a measure to combat typhus which became more and more epedemio. Very reasonable Indeed but what did it look like in practice? At first there vas no hot water on certain days because of lack of wood* When hot water was available, then people had to stay in line and to wait for hours and afterwards they cane out with more lice than they brought in. The men who were in charge at the

Bamja contrived a flourishing business. For three rubele he issued a certificate confirming the disinfection with out even bothering to walk into the Bantta. And so an institution which was supposed to be helpful became a nuisanoe and a farce.

There were more instances like that. There is an order that nobody can visit a patient in a hospital without putting on a white coat. The idea is tery laudible and should be coamended. People coming from the outside are liable to bring along some infections and this should be prevented by the white coat. But how was it practiced? There were only a few coats available for the public, the visitors had to wait until somebody came out after their visit, with a coat, and the same coat of s±xan course was used again. Those coats were not washed for days and being used continuously they were not white any more and besides Instead of preventing infections they transferred the lice from one visitor to the other and of course to the patients too. However, for the outside world, it sounds very progressive when they here of such modern regulations for visitors In hospitalc. THE POLISH-ASM* AND WELFARE ORGAHIZATICK UJ THE U.S.S.R.

In the beginning of 19UJ, rumors started among us that the Polish goven- ment now reconciled with the Soviets will start some relief and welfare

organization with the help of U.8.X. and England, all over Russia. It was 2k6 meant to help to survive those hundreds of thousands of people deported

In l?Ao and new set free. At the same time rumors were spread that the polish government In London started already to organize a Polish army to fight on the Busslan side. There vere also nevs that the Polish Bnbassador put up his headquarters In TASHUHT, the capital of Uzbekistan. After some tine the name of General Anders was mentioned as the Commander In Chief of the would-be Polish army and the place Buzuluk as the headquarters of the general and his staff. (I am sure that the people in the United States had better and. earlier information on those subjects but I am trying to tell the story which reached us only by rumors and hearsay from our side of the fence.

In February 19^2, a man, a lawyer from Warsaw, already a resident in

Butfhara on written authority from the Polish Bnbassy, started some activity.

He registered our people in the city in order to find out who and how many we are. He was a very fine and honest gentleman who spent some two years before being single, in a corrective labor camp. He had no means yet from the Babaasy to put up some office, so he was working in a tea house (Chai-

Khanah) crowded say and night with people, mostly of the Lagrovcy type and full of lice. He contracted shortly after, typhus there and the poor man died.

He was one of the first victims of this epedemic disease with more to follow.

Among our people was a great percentage of the former intelligentsia.

They used to meet every day In the little square in the center of the city and to discuss our situation which was rather desperate. Ve realized that the war actually only started and that we have to be prepared for several more years.

Here ve vere, selling out our belongings, eating up our small means and vere confronted at the same time with the scarcity of food and prices soaring sky high. There was no work for us here of any kind, not even manual Jobs. with Besides this wouldn't solve our problem any way considering thai/the monthly Skj

wages, ve would only be able to buy maybe three or four kilos of dark flour.

Once a few of those people cane together (I we* one of then) established theraeelf as a sort of citizen's eoemlttee and discussed what to do. During one those deliberatione, we were approached by two men/of which was a lawyer before the war In Polish Silesia and the other a higher clerk In the Polish government bank. They suggested that if we would delegate them and provide then with enough money for the trip to Tashkent, hating connections with high officials in the Polish government, (the lawyer claimed that the Polish ffinbaesador at that tine was his schoolmate) they could do something for our people stranded here. Our Idea was to get from the Polish Babasey the means to start sane cooperative - production - units in order to keep the people busy let then do some constructive work and let them earn wages which would be in some proportion to the high cost of living and at least partly cover their expenses. We accepted their offer as the only solution in this situation.

They promised everything from the noon. They got the money which we collected among a group of soolal minded people for their trip and they left with our blessing.

After two months one man, the lawyer, cams back, after he secured himself at the 2ribasay at Tashkent, a high position as head of the so-called Dslegatura in Bukhara, an outpost of the Belief-and Welfare Organization, which was supposed to take care of all Polish citizens in Bukhara and the adjacent

Kolchos'y where many families settled in the meantime. The other man didn't even show up In Buohara any more because he secured himself a similar position in BOOB other place in the Horth. Our new delegate didn't even find it worthwhile to report to the citleen's committee which had sent him as its representative and didn't oven care to give an account of the money given to him for the trip. 2hQ

The Polish government in London and the Polish Hnbassy on its behalf built up a net of outposts of the big welfare-and relief organization called Delegating'a, covering the most Important concentrations of the freed polish citizens, with big warehouses as supply centers of this organization. How it actually worked I shall describe later after observing it for many months in action. (I am trying to describe the events in their chronological order and not to get ahead of the current events.) In the meantime around the end of March 19^2 a sort of miraele happened to socae people. Some families received cables of personal messages with yery short notice to be the next day completely packed in Kagan at the station and to wait for the arriving military transport. What actually happenedt The first detail of the Polish-Anders-Army left Buss la and the members of the army were allowed to take along with them their families. Those who had no families took their friends, claiming them as their relatives. The first transport left so fast that many were taken completely by sur- prise. It was very easy to Join the transport and actually soae people who happened to be at the station at that time, when the military transport passed by, were even encouraged to Jump in and some did. Unfortunately, not many people knew about this first transport. The transport was directed to Krasno- vodsk on the Caspian Sea in the Turkmen SSR, was taken here on ships and landed in the port of Pahlevl in Iran. From here they were sent in trucks to Msshohed and to Teheran. After several weeks very happy letters came from them. The Soviet authorities and the KKVD were very lenient at that time and if not too many civilians came out with the transport it was because everything was done Army in by the Polish ir-Tr""1" a great hurry end only a few people knew about it. The second and last transport or rather the evacuation of the Polish-Anders- Anuy occurred many months later, August1042 * was not *° ° mucil <*? a miracle, 2k9

and became a rather aad and oootroveraial matter. More about it latar.

As I mentioned before the Polish government In exile In London started to organize vith the support of U.S.A. and Great Britain, a Welfare and

Belief Organisation for the stranded Polish cltlwms, lllerated from their places of detention after their deportation. The first bigger supplies arrived la May or June 19^2. Those were clothing for men, women, children mostly second hand| blankets, shoes, warm underwear, socks, overcoats, etc.

She good items consisted of white flour, farina, rice, powdered milk, dried, eggs, cocoa, soap, military blacuite and matzoe. There were also seme medicines and vaccinations in small quantities. Those supplier came mostly by ship from the U.S.A. to the Persian Gulf and unloaded here. From here they were taken over by the American and English military authorities and transported partly by train and partly by trucks, through the Persian province of Chorassan, to the Persian Russian border, in the mountains near Ashohabad.

Fran here they were distributed by special convoy by train and again by trucks to the different warehouses which in turn supplied several Belegatura,e

located in cities with bigger concentrations of Polish citizens*

Those warehouses and Delegatura's were operated by men who received their appointments direct from the Polish Rnbassy, residing at that time like

all other foreign siXssions in Kujbyshev on the Yolga.^~Thoae appointees who

occupied positions of public trust, and on whose actions life and death of

thousands depended, were net always chosen according to their merits* The

idea was that men known from before the war as social or political leaders,

should be in charge of those branches of the big welfare organisation, but - alas, in too many places (like the one In Buchara) smart operators through

some pull and connections, got hold of those important positions. 250

The activities of the Polish Welfare Organization cannot be described

in detail without mentioning the Polish Army *» USSR. Thoee two organizations started functioning mare or less at the same time and their activities were no closely connected, Interwoven and overlapping that both had to be

considered simultaneously.

I don't know whether the history of the Polish Army and Welfare Organiza-

tion In Russia has already been written. I was watching both organizations

very closely, the welfare organisation from the beginning until the Russians

ordered It shut down and the Polish Army from the moment when the recruit-

ing of the second transport started to Its embarkation in Kraanovodsk In 19b2.

When I report on the Polish Army Z am overlooking the first transport

which left rather hastily In March 1<&2 In a rather unorganised way. I am

considering only the so-called second transport which under the leadership of

General Anders evacuated nearly all Poles from Soviet Russia, who could be

reached direct or indirect, either by the Army or by the so-called Delagatura's.

Unfortunately not all Polish citizens in UJR.S.R. were considered by General

Anders and his commander* as Poles.

My observations, ay personal experiences and those of others concerning

those two organisations were not always pleasant. But on the other hand it is

9SK impossible to overlook and to Ignore them because too many tragedies and

human lives were connected with them. Maybe I am unwillingly, touching an

hornets nest, but I cannot help it If I do and I have to take the risk in

order to do Justice to those fateful events which took place here.

In order to understand those following events, we must keep apart our

American idea and definition of citizenship and nationality from the ideas

prevailing In the pre-war Poland. An American is an American citizen Ipso facto and his nationality if somebody is especially interested in, is his or his

parents place of origin, called sometimes "extraction". It was very different

In Poland. Everybody who obtained a Polish passport was a Polish oltlzen, 851

oanetineo ho was also looked at as a Polish national, but he was not coneiderod a Pole ualooa ho was a Gentile. 2a other wards, a Jew, even if he could trace back the residence of hie ancestors In Poland, through the middle ageo, was not a Pole. But a German gentile for Instance, who took up residence here ten or twenty years ago, learned the Polish language and didn't claim his Geroan nationality, became a Bole when he wanted to.

Many of those Germans who pretended to become Poles were actually as It turned out later Hazi spies and were the first after the Bail's ocoupied

Poland, to betray It, and to take over high Hazi positions, while the Jewish citizens who suffered together with the Poles, were arrested, persecuted and deported. But the Poles were so blindod and literally doped with their hatred that they didn't understand it neither then or later.

How to explain it? Sy a deep rooted anti-semetism with which mery

Pole is brought up from childhood. This discrimination and attitude towards the polish citizens of Jewish faith, didn't even change in Soviet Russia when everybody had to face the sane misery and where all Polish citisena,

Jews and Gentiles, were on euqal footing, when confronted with hunger, typhus and death.

And It so happened that with only few exceptions, Poles were put in charge of those £elegatura*s and the Jews were sometimes Deputies or in subaltern positions. Subsequently the goods as supplied from abroad were In the first place distributed among the Poles. This was done so openly and ostentatiously that In scans places the Polish Jews didn't even try to apply because they were under the Impression that those supplies were not meant for them. It caused a lot of bitterness and resentment to see how sane people wore completely equipped and walked out from the warehouse with big bundles while the others had to walk around in rags, still waiting for some small allocation. 2?2

I am not sure whether this was the Intention of tho benefactor^from abroad and I don't think that the Polish authorities} in London or In

Kujbyshev had this In mind, but It was actually the practice of the Dole- gat ee. Thoae nan who not long ago were theraeelven destitute and miaorable, behaved now as potentates with arrogance as they would hand out charity from their own pockets, sure that there will be nobody who would reproach or rebuke them. Those authorities were very far away and eventual complaints wouldn't even reach them. Afh Is^fcfttejiralPa&d? jStere were few exceptions , men who saw only the suffering human beings in every ran who applied for help.

It is needless to say that those delegates and their assistants, especially

those In charge of the warehouse, made ample une of the goods, arranging

parties for their Intimate friends, wining and dining aa in good eld times.

Later on after every Polish gentile received what he needed, eventually

every Polish citizen received some clothes and acme food, one more tho other

didn't have any more, like ehoes, pants, shirts, drea^ce, eocks,dtc. The food

allocations which were only sporadic were completely unsufficient and people

were eo hungry as ever. People had to sell the clothee and whatever tliey

received from the Delegatura'e after certain lntervelo, In addition to their

own belongings when they still had some. the Selegatura's received not only gsribE goods In kind for dIstr;Vbution,

but also money in rubels. Those were dollars from abroad, converted by the

Russian bank into Bubele to a preference exchange rate for diplomatic missions.

i.s., twelve rubels to the dollar instead of the official rate of 5.^0 rubels.

Of course both rates were completely out of line.

The money was used for salaries for people working there but also for medical dispensaries, manned by our own Polish physicians :Tor aoup kitchens, 253

repair laundries, shoe-end tailor/shops, organised an a non-profit hvnlB. The idea was a very good one. At first it provided work for a crood raany people and secondly, people oould get rid partly of the lice and didn't have to walk around In rage. They had also at leant one warm soup a day and eotne- times only every second day. However, all those institutions didn't solve the problem how to keep alive and how to survive. There was not tho planned or organised distribution of the goods for everyJ»ody whan the Delegatura wae supposed to take care of and provide for* {formally everybody would think that it would be figured out, what calory minimum would b

Paralell to the welfare and relief organisation, the Polish Army known as the General Anders army got its start. The Anders army had its headquarters in Jangi-Jul, near Tashkent. Two divisions were organised in TTzbekestan, one in Kermlne and one in Ousary. The news about the Polish Army spread out very fast and people from all directions started flocking to those three army centers. The advantagee of joining the army were manifold. At first everybody wae sure that the army would leave Russia in spite of rumors to the eontary that the Polish army now being organized will fight on the Russian front. Secondly, the army will provide for the time being, food and shelter for the men or women who will Join and also for their families. (It was the firat time in Poland's history that 25* women wore taken into the array. They were called Pestka's, the ©qulvalent of the Vacs here.) Sane more cautious people went first by themselves, leaving their families for the time being behind, some liquidated everything and arrived vith their families at one of those centers. Soon some came back and brought rather bad neve. Those were Polish citizens of Jewish faith who were rejected by the army la spite of the fact that they were officers in reserve, whe served with the pre-war Polish array and ©coupled leading professicna^iand social positions in Poland* They reported about the antisemetic atmosphere in \ the assy-headquarters and the anay-camps and told with deep bitterness and despair that at the same time when they were under different excuses rejected, often Insulted, and sometimes even beaten upj Poles, who never served in the artsy before, who could hardly read or write, some physically unfit were accepted and their families accommodated. They came to realize once again that no help and no protection could be expected from those authorities, power-srunk, blind from hatred, prejudice and discrimination. They wont even so far that they didn't even allow those men to spend the night In their camp, didn't provide them with any bread or money for their way bade, (sane were left penniless after they spent contracted all their money for the trip there). Itecay afclnrarrlaat typhus*

A friend of mine en eminent polish lawyer J&BBX. before the war, an artillery captain in the reserve, was first accepted by the army, put In a uniform., but after a few days, under some excuse, rejected. On his way back he contracted typhus • Us devoted wife who took care of him during his illness, got infected and died shortly after. It was the same lady I have described before, how she *«as working at winter time cleaning the icy roads from snow and how ah© in her selfless devotion was nursing her husband during his Pelagra illness, chopping wood for weeks tit the same time* A few physicians were accepted, not all of them, in spite of the fact that they were badly needed in tho array. After a short tine recruiting commissions were sent out to places of bigger concentration of Polish citizens, consisting of several 25fc A

Polish officers, already la uniforms, with a senior officer la oansnand, an army physician and Russian. HKVD liaaon officer. The procedure was always the same. As soon as they found out that the candidate is Jewish, lie was rejected, mostly for physical unt&tness, but a 255

~~the same time every Pole, some brought in by assistance of others because they were too weak to walk, passed the physical examination with flying banners.~~

~~Of course there were exceptions too. One concerned a young wan , an~~

~~internationally Icnown water-polo player, wonderfully built, whose physical fitness even two yearn in a soviet camp couldn't destroy. It wasn't difficult~~

~~to find out that the young man was Jewish, (circumcision) and he was already~~

~~rejected when one officer who heard his name recognized him as & well-kaown~~

~~champion. The commission huddled together and after some whispering they~~

~~couldn't help but accept the nan. To reject the nan on account of physical~~

~~unfltnoss would be even for then, too embarrassing.~~

~~I would like to mention my own experience with this recruiting coraaission.~~

~~A friend of mine a chemist, employed before the was. by the Standard Oil Co.,~~

~~dressed completely of course, left our clothes and underwear on the bench In~~

~~the waiting room and walked In. Both of us were immediately rejected. I was~~

~~given the reason that my heart was in such a bad condition that I could hardly~~

~~survive the basic training. (JEscidently I didn't need any basic training~~

~~because I nerved for three years with the army before. I experienced in~~

~~later years a far greater strain and nothing happened In the last ten years to my heart.) The only result of this event that I found on my clothes and underwear~~

~~several lice after I come home, picked up while undressing on the bench.~~

Vfy friend found some lice on hie body too. After a short time, he came down with typhus and died shortly after in the hospital leaving a young widow. We had a hard time to find and to recognize his body in the hospital. We buried him In the Jewish Cemetary In Buchara. 2%

~~Those who were accepted vent a few days later to one of those three army center** after he and hip family were good equipped and provided for by the local Delefc&tura.~~

6crae people tried a different approach to get affiliated with the Polish aray. They received messages froa their relativofc. or ecsae political organizations from abroad to the effect that as a result of their intervention, the anay command received orderB from their embassies in Washington or London or direct from the Polish govenunent in London to evacuate them. Those people vent of course to the headquarters in Yangl Yul to follow up t:io3© instructions.

The Polish governaent was represented in General Anders? ^ervi^ xarters by a civilian lias on envoy. 3h somn cases, they wore successful in, others they came back with nothing, after spending EHUXV weeks there waiting and anti- chambering.

~~There was some religious leaders (Babble) and representatives c orthodox~~

Jews who went there trying to appeal direct to General Anders or to the Polish anay Bishop GeVlina who arrived on a mission direct frcm London in order to lift up ahe morale and the religious spirit of the array recruited from no different heterogene elements. Also in these cases, only a few succeeded and the others cacao back dlssolutioned and bitterly disappointed.

There were some racketeers who knew their ways even in Soviet Russia and provided the high ranking ofiiclale with everything thoir heart would desire, expecting in turn as repayment in kind, the so much coveted departure from Russia. Those suoeeeddd the most.

There were some who tried to get converted at the anay headquarters, or at one of the coonands. Some Chaplains, not convinced of their sincere Indentions, rejected them. SOE» vere helpful and baptiaed them. Those converted became eventually affiliated with the army.

~~There were still others who tried their luck counting on soras lucky coin- cident. One case as an example was my brother-in-law. 257~~

~~You remember hie story from my previous description how we were eo miraculously united In Buchara. After I was rejected h-j the army, h© vao~~

~~eager to Joen the army himself, hoping that in this way he would "be able to~~

~~pee next page #297 A~~

~~as his immediate family. He bad a slight chance because he was physically In good condition and besides he served with the Polish army before the war and graduated from the officers school.~~

~~In spite of those qualifications he was not too optimistic because similar cases vere flatly rejected, but he left encouraged by us anyway.~~

Surprisingly enough, he didn't come back. From a later letter we learned the reason. As soon as he arrived In Jangi-Jul and enteree the yard of the army headquarters, a man with a distinction of a high staff officer passed by, came back, had a good look at him and embraced him vlth the most cordial greetings.

You might remember from my brother-in-law's story, how he was caught by a dog while crossing the Roumanian border, how he had been arrested and put during the night in a cellar and how he found there already another prisoner who he became friendly with but who never revealed his name. This high Polish officer was now the other prisoner. When he heard that my brother- in-law came to Join the army, he took him under his arm, introduced him personally as his friend to the conalssion and he was without any trouble, accepted Into the army. Our morale and our spirit got a tremendous aplift after we received his letter with the good news. There was hope that we aa his family, would be able to depart with the army. It turned out differently, as we thought and planned, but aore about it later. There was another case of a lucky accident. Among us, in Buchara, lived a physician, an eye specialist, who, bolng a Jew, was rejected by the army.

~~It was useless to argue that an army might need an eye specialist (slo). Ho, a. they can get along without. After some time It happened that the Colonel was~~

~~sent from the headquarters on official business to the Sslegatura of Buchara.~~

~~After business comes pleasure and so the Delegate invited the Colonel and his 258~~

Adjutaftf for dinner to his hone. After a good dinner, the gentleman thought it might be a good idea to have a bridge gams but the trouble vaa that there vae no fourth hand for the game. The Delegate had to think hard and fast and finally he recalled that the already mentioned eye specialist vas according to rumors a good bridge player. A messenger was

Immediately sent out late in the evening to summon the physician, who arrived promptly, rather scared. He relaxed, vhen he heard that he was only needed as a bridge hand. The physician played indeed good and the Colonel was so impressed that he gave before he left, orders, that the physician has to be evacuated with the army and he actually left Russia later. The morale of this true story is; It is sometimes better to be a good bridge player than to be a good physician.

There was still others and their number was great, who arrived with their families in those three army centers and tried to make friends and connections among the officers and non-coomissloned officers in the army.

~~The idea was to persuade them to register them and their families as Tkicles,~~

Aunts, Sisters, Brothers, Cousins, etc. Bow was it done? At first on a social basis, inviting the officers or the others to their temporary quarters, dining and wining them. This was quite an expensive proposition, considering that everything had to be bought on the black market, including the wine. Later on, more than that was necessary. People offered them values, like diamonds, if they had some, foreign exchange - American dollars preferrable and in some cases a deal was worked out that a certain sum of money will be paid abroad.

Of course this was only done with trustworthy people, having a reputation of being wealthy and honest, who didn't have any cash or values with them. Vhen the deal was olosed in one of those ways, then the officer or the non-com. registered them as his family explaining that he didn't register them earlier because he Just found out about them and they didn't know until now that they were alive somewhere in Russia. 259

Of course it was not as simple as that. Sooner or later somebody denounced them, that they are not relatives, and not even Poles. When this happened then an organisation called ZBNBARMKRJA POLOVA (Front Gendarme) became interested in the case and started Investigating. A roal field of activities for a front-polioe. This organization had different ways to deal with those people. They asked for references and inquired wherever they could. There were some tricks used too. Suppose some Sargent testified that some lady was his sister. They took the lady then for a long interview, inquiring among others about their apartment, room, where their alleged brother or parents were living before the war, at which street, which floor, where was the table standing, where the lamp, color of furniture, how many rugs and what cdlor, etc. At the same time the man was asked the same question. If those descriptions didn't conform, trouble started for both of them.

I knew of a case where a mother with an eight year old girl wae registered as a military family. The front-police had some doubts about the family whether they were Jewish or not. The girl was taken in a special room and was asked about the church and services there and asked her finally to recite the

Lord's prayer. Through all those investigations or rather inquisitions, those people had to go threw only because as Polish citizens they wanted so badly to get out of Russia exactly as the others wanted. Of course the Poles^had no troubles whatever to Join the army or to become part of the family even being complete strangers, with no complications and no humiliations whatever. It happened quite frequently that some soldier was ordered by his superior officer to register some strange girl who found herself arcynd the camp, as his sister and everything was OBay. It even happened that the prostitutes who were in

19bo picked up from the streets in the biggest cities by the Russians and deported, now after the liberation as Polish subjects, flocked back very much attracted by the army centers. Those women had no troubles whatever to be 260

~~registered aa somebody's dependent in the army but Jewish prominent cititens, sen who served the oountry with distinction as professionals, scholars, leaders in the Industry, were left out.~~

Of course there were exceptions. Some Poles did everything possible to take along their friends and families, sacrificing a lot and even being ridiculed. They did it selfless, expecting no compensation whatever.

~~They fed those people sharing their own rations. But those weee only a few exceptions from the general rule. mm w *ff r*wr~~

~~A few weeks after my brother-in-law left for the army my wife came down with high fever. % wife felt Instinctively what it was, set the house In~~

~~order and told us, not to desprflr, but be rather prepared for her long sickness. It was Typhus. So she laid down on her "bed" which consisted of three~~

suitcases, everyone of them different in dimensions and shape. She cheered up every one of us because she couldn't see sad faces around. This is what happened. A friend of hers got Typhus. She had a husband and a little girl and all of them were somewhere lost and helpless* Ify wife went to her home washed her, made her bed, and attended her the best she could. While doing this, she was bitten by a louse and brought some more home. As a result, my wife contracted Tyjphus too. One day later our elder boy and two days later

our younger boy came down with the same disease. I was the only one In our family who was not affected. Our boys were laying on one large wooden bench which was used as their bed. There was no food at home, no sugar which was necessary to strengthen the weakening heart, and the European doctor who

~~came in, had no medicines. Nature had to take care of herself.~~

~~The wife of the Chemical Soglneer who died only a short time ago, was~~

~~attending my family during the day time while I was working and during the 261~~

~~the night I took over. It was a heartbreaking eight to eee my whole family laying lietlees and apathetic and not being able to help them.~~

The boy» didn't move and did not complain beoauae they didn't want to disturb and worry their Hanoi, tfy wife Buffered from sleeplessness and an unhuman headache. She is normally very patient but this was more than she oould endure. Eer pain was so terrific that her screams could be heard outside in the street. Our friends who lived nearby stqpped in the street and shook their head In deep sympathy.

~~I remember once somebody told me, that there is In town, one European family who has tablets for headache relief, (something you could buy here~~

In every drug store.) I was walking for hours around town being myself so weak that I had to stop now and then In order not to break down until I found the family but unfortunately, they used the last tablet themselves.

And so, I came back with nothing to alleviate her suffering. Our doctor called in another one for consultation. They had among two of them, one injection but they decided to keep It until the critical day wUl cone.

*fcr wife feeling that the situation is very serious asked me to cable to her brother because she wanted to see him for the last time. Unfor- tunately the cable didn't reach him because he was sent away by the army to the far north to bring to the army headquarters, all those Poles who couldn't until then, be contacted otherwise.

Another mjraole happened. Vfy wife suffered innensely but after the injection, which was administered to her the last day, she Improved and thank God, she survived. One day later, my younger son decided that he wanted to get up. He dressed himself and he was so weak that he could hardly walk but being always very conscious of his duties and If nothing would happen, he took his little hatchet and started chopping wood which he thought 26S

~~we might need. I was moved to tears seeing him doing It. My other eon got up a day or two later attending to hie chores.~~

The cable reached my brother-in-law some time later with another cable informing him that the family la veil again. He come as quick ae he could and brought his army provisions, including fat and sugar and even some fresh wonderful peaches growing around Tashkent. And all this, made It possible for our patients to recover slowly from this terrible disease.

By now it was already known for sure that the second and last Polish army transport will leave for Iran. The Poles were all in a very gay and festive mood, because everybody was direct or Indirectly connected with the army. The months of August, 19^2 came nearer. They tried to collect as much values as they could and occupying high positions In the welfare organization they had no trouble to acquire bigger quantities of valuable coranodl- ties and to sell them. For the money they bought diamonds and dollars which they figured rightly they could very well use abroad.

~~The first trains with military and civilian personnel started rolling from the headquarters In Jangi Jul heading for the Port of Qnbarkation In~~

Kraanovoek on the vapelan Sea. The procedure was very simple. The Polish army command submitted lists with names In Polish and SussIan to the NKVD llaaon officer, General Zukov, at General Anders headquarters and he signed them with no farther checking and the transport left Buss la for good.

What happened now to the others? All those Polish Jewish families who took up residence In the three army oenterB were tremendously excited because they still didn't know whether all their efforts and expenses will be of any use, whether they will be allowed in one way or another, to Join the transport and to leave Russia. 263

In the cities far away from the centers like in Buohare something else happened. A list of all citizens was drawn up by the Delegate in- eluding moot Jewish intellectuals, Rabble, men prominent in Commerce and

Industry and those lucky people were told to be packed and to appear at the station ready for a transport to the nearest army center in Stfsary. Actually one transport of cltisene left and when the next group assembled two days later, the Delegate appeared with a ca&le from the Polish army headquarters stating that only Poles have to leave and under his own responsibility he has personally to see to it, that no Polish Jew should be Included. Ee bid in a hurry goodbye to his Jewish Deputy and his Jewish co-workers, boarded with a few Poles and their families, the train, and left rather embarrassed. The people stood at the station with their families, stunned and confused, seeing the train leaving and with him, all their dreams and hopes. There was nothing elee for them to do than to go back. Iktfortunately some didn't have wheee to go, because they liquidiated everything in a great hurry even their horns.

As soon as the Delegate reached fiuzary, he made it his business according to the cabled instructions, that everybody who reached the army center with the previous transport should be sent back to Buchara. A few days later those families who experienced there great happiness for a short few days, came back, bitter and heartbroken like from a shipwreck.

~~What actually happened, and what was the reason of this last minute order?~~

~~The real truth is not known. I heard later different v ere lone which~~

General Anders allegedly brought up to his defense. One version was, that according to his agreement with the Soviets ho could evacuate together with the army, a certain number of people only, and he felt as hie "patriotic duty" to exhaust the quota with as much gentile Poles as possible. 26k

Another explanation wae that the Soviets who in the beginning after the Sikoraki-Stalin pact, freed every Poliah citizen from the camps and places of detalnment with no distinction whatever between gentiles and Jews suddenly decided to differentiate between those groups and let only the

~~Poles go. I personally don't agree with the second explanation. The following generally known Instance speaks against it. In one place where the whole~~

Polish population was ready for evacuation, the sane thing happened as do- scribed above. Somebody free the Polish authorities arrived and ordered that only the Poles can leave. Some from the Jewish population, more energetic and outraged ran from the station to the NK7D complaining about it. The KKVD commander came and declared that either everybody with no exception will leave or nobody. And xtaqc the whole population consisting of eevsr&l hundred people, loft this way.

~~As & result cf this discriminatory action, only a few hundred Polish~~

~~Jewish families including all the old and new converts, left with the second~~

Polish army transport for Iran. But not all of them reached this land cf dreams. Some were thrown cut in the last moment, being already in the train ready to leave. One girl was thrown out from the train half way from Krasnovodsk pennilecB, not being even allowed to take along her luggage. She arrived after two weeks back in Buchara, heartbroken and destitute. I knew of a family who was thrown out already from the ship while embarking with the army transport for the voyage over the Caspian Sea to the Persian port Pahlevi, The reason;

~~in the last sacaaent, they were reco&ilzed by oomebody as Jews.~~

~~What happened during those exciting and hectic days for me and my family?~~

~~During that time, when everybody was thinking and planning new to get~~

~~connected with the Polish army* I acquired Typhoid with Malaria as an additional~~

~~complication. It was hard on me and my family to watch our friends coming in to~~

~~say goodbye before leaving, while we were left behind, without any moans completely helpless. KO?~~

~~Another thing. We being elligible for evacuation as a family of our brother-in-law, who van accepted by the army, couldn't cake use of this privilege for three reasons:~~

1* The letter from the army command confirming our military family statue could not be presented to the Delegate because he surrounded himself vith a host of secretaries and simply didn't let anybody into his office with the exception of hie cronies and henchmen. My wife left me while sick Pies' alone for several hours every day, ,*vo weeks, and tried to reach the aig potentate and to present him vith the official letter but she came back every day disappointed because she wae not admitted to him. He was so busy distributing ^oods among his friends and making money before his departure. our 2. According to the last order of General Anders earn status was changed.

Only Boles could take along their direct or indirect families, even distant cousins. As far as a fov Jews admitted to the army were concerned, a sister and her family was not considered as direct faaily.

~~3. My sickness. It took me several weeke to recover because of lack~~

~~of medicines and proper nourishment. When my brothet-kn-law heard about our plight, he postponed his depar-~~

~~ture to the last transport and came to see us.'" He wanted to stay with us,~~

~~and not leave us alone here. After all, he decided to Join the army hoping~~

~~to get us out this way and now the whole purpose became meaningless* But~~

~~we pleaded vith him to leave, convincing him that he might be able to help~~

~~us more being abroad and establishing contact vith our families and friends~~

~~there, than to stay vith us and to share our misery. And so he took leave from~~

~~ue. Our hearts vere heavy. We didn't knov for how long. Maybe forever.~~

~~I was Just able to get up for the first time from bed (which was rather~~

~~a wooden bench) when somebody came In repeating a rumor that from the army~~

~~center in Eermlne an additional transport is being organized for all those vho were left behind. Having nothing to lose, still very weak, I decided to 266~~

~~go there, taking along the letter from the army command to find out myself about the last ohaace to get out. In order to do It, I had to go i'lrst to~~

Kagan, and to find here somebody who vill help m, of ooxuree with some money, to get on the train to Kermine because a special pormiasion from the HKVD for travelling was neoesaary. While waiting for all this, 1 found /the station under a few trees, a whole group of people, families with their children, sitting on top of their luggage and waiting since days for something. I die- covered amongst them, some who I knew, but they acted very strange. Somehow

I was under the impreeesdn that they didn't want to be talked to and they were acting as they didn't know no. Finally one man who grasped the embarrassing situation, gestured me aside and while unobserved , explained to me what is going on. Those people pretended to be gentile Boles all the time but still did not succeed in getting Into some transport. Here in Kagan at the station wheee every train la passing by, they are sitting since days waiting for some lucky breaker chance, that some transport commander night have pity on them.

~~And eo they were acting their part, void of any self-respect and dignity until the last moment and didn't want to be recognised by anybody who kneufehem as~~

Jews and who himself Is a Jew* The mere acquaintance with Jews could make them open to suspicion and Jeopardise their position. But all this contemplable attitude was of no avail. The trains with the Polish transport were passing by and nobcdy bothered with them. While waiting at the station in Kagan I had another experience. I was watching many trains passing by full of Poles, some in uniforms, many in civilian clothes with women and children, everybody very gay and in good mood.

~~After all, they are leaving Russia forever going abroad. Food was distributed ony-vng those people by the Polish army personnel all the way along.~~

~~Suddenly, I noticed that during this particular stop^ue passengers were handed some very nice printed cartons with some eatable content of course. 2t)7~~

~~I looked nearer at them and what I saw were American cartons containing,~~

~~Manijbhewitz Matzoe.~~

~~I mentioned before that amongst the supplies provided by the USA for the~~

Polish Welfare Organization were Matzoe but I have never unz seen them before until thie moment. We have spent already two passovers here but ve didn't even know that the Matzoe existed and here all the time. How I knew what for the American Jews sent the Man2phewitz Matzoe all the way long.

~~To feed the Poles who rejected their Jewish co-citizens but didn't reject their Matzoe.~~

Standing there at the station in Kagan and watching those by-paeeing trains I felt like - I guess - an abandoned child must feel. I pitied myself but I had pity also for them, falling so low. (Many years later then I heard here for the first time the wonderful spirituals "I feel like a Motherless child", the mood and the feeling of this moment standing at the station at

~~Kagan came back to me.)~~

After a five hour ride by train, I arrived in Eermlne for the first tiiae in my life. There is a little settlement around the station with a large ootton mill but Bermlne itself, a small town with some two to three thousand population is some four miles away from the station and can be reached just by walking or hitch-hiking with some truck or Uzbek Arba by pure chance. 2h those times you were apt to find everywhere somebody you knew and so I found several families with whom we lived together at the Poslolok and was welcome to stay with them. Those families moved after their liberation to Samarkand and came specially to Kermine which was a big army center, looking for contacts as described already above. The situation of those families was hopeless and desperate. Sewsxal families liquidated everything in their last place of residence and moved over here hoping to be evacuated with the army. Hundreds 268

of families were cramped Into a few small bouses or rather mud huts, paying a fortune for every square feet of space. At least two families shared every little room. People lived here In a constant nervous tension/

In an atmosphere of exciting rumors and. full of expectation. Because they expected to leave at any minute, they practically lived packed, sitting on passed their belongings. But in the meantime days, weeks and months puct by, and trying to make contact with the officers or non-coms, of the Polish army, they spent everything they possessed on entertainment, gifts and bribe>

They were hungry themselves but gave dinners for their Polish army friends with wine, liquor and meat dishes, everything bought for enormous prices at the black market. Every family had somebody who kept them In suspense and who supposedly claimed them as their family. Those people had to buy every pound of bread on the black market because they had no bread ration cards.

Bread cards were Issued onJLy for residents of the little town Kermine, but those people couldn't think of moving to Kermine where they could get easier and cheaper homes and bread because they were afraid that the transport would leave at any moment at the station and they wouldn't be on hand. They were afraid that it might be too late for them until they could be able to find a/*

~~Uzbek with an Arba to bring them and their belongings to the station.~~

And so they lived at the Btation at Kermine since months spending everything that they possessed and when I arrived there, all the zna transports were gone, a few lucky families went along but the vast majority was left behind.

~~There were amongst them physicians, lawyers, big names in commerce and industry, social leaders, intellectuals, experiencing a tremendous shock. 269~~

~~Why asked them again and again , are they lees worthy than all the others, who lef sane of whom couldn't even speak a decent Polish .~~

~~Row about the rumor concerning the last transport. The rumor was only partly based on the real facts and here Is the shameful story.~~

After the last army transport left, suddenly one officer and several non-coms, arrived and told the people that they were delegated to organise a transport consisting of a limited number of those vho were left behind. are The people were made to understand that payment is expected and values/of importance. Everybody tried to get Into the line to register, and a part of the military group took privately care of xsxxa the *©a*. The registration took place during the night and they left the next morning, promising to come back with their ready list confirmed by the high authorities and to send the people abroad. That military delegation never came back. The whole thing was a swindle, master-minded my those individuals who were In- deed part of the army and who thought it might be a good Idea having a day

~~and night on hand before their transport left, to squeese out from those~~

~~Jews the rest which they still might possess, and they got it.~~

~~They were not better than those Jaokalls who were undressing and robbing~~

~~a dying man in the street in Buchara. I had another experience while being there. I was shown a new cemetery~~

~~at the other sdbdtt side of the station. Here were buried many of our people~~

~~who died here during those terrible months of expectation and humiliation.~~

~~They died from Typhus em a result of those terrible living conditions.~~

~~Many graves couldn't be recognised any more. The wind covered them with /%e~~

~~sand from the nearby desert. Eermine, what means in Uzbek "the vally of death"~~

~~obtained at that time its real meaning.~~

~~After I heard the story from the actual victims of this swindle I went~~

~~home convinced that I didn't miss anything not arriving here earlier. 270~~

All thie 1B true. It ia also truo that the Polish army Including the Jews whom they took along, distinguished herself honorably later at Anzio and at Monte Cassino for her courage and gallantry during the allied campaign in Italy and was admired by the vhole world.

As a side episode, it is interesting to know that the vhole unloading from the trains and embarkation on ships of this second Polish army evacuation in Karasnovodsk (Port on the Caspian Sea) took place under the supervision of a Polish Colonel under direct orders of General Anders. When the last contingent vas already on board of the ship everybody was waiting for the Colonel but he didn't show up. He sent Instead, a note saying that he decided to stay in Soviet Russia. It was Colonel Berling, a Polish Career.

~~General Staff officer, who later organized another Polish army, the so-called fi i, Polish Peoples Irmy which entered Poland together with the Soviet Army.~~

Incidentally this Polish-Career-JBtaff-officer,Colonel Zygmunt Berllng never came back to Poland, neither during the war or after. According to the rumors from last year, he is teaching at the Frunze Military Academy.

~~Whether he is still there or alive, nobody knows. AFTER THE EVACUATION OF THE POLISH ARMY AND THE POLISH POPULATION.~~

~~What happened now to the Dalegatura'e of the Welfare organization after the departure of the army?~~

The Delegates and their staff te as far aa they were Poles/ left everything In a great hurry and confusion. In some cases they handed over the organization to anybody who WQB Just on hand. Generally, everything was left in a chaos.

~~In places where they had a Jewish deputy from before, the wholw organization radical could at least function without any serious Interruption or ratter eea&d changer~~

~~1*., The warehouses were left loaded with goods. In some cases for instance~~

~~in Kermine vfee&feev also the army had their depots, there was such an abundance~~

~~0f goods that it was Impossible to keep them In stock rooms and they were kept~~

~~in the open exposed to weather and rain and still the Polish Delegates who 271~~

~~left, didn't distribute than to all the Polish citizens here. They should rather perish or rot.~~

~~We would expect that frcn now on the situation should have Improved.~~

~~There were after all In moat places Jewish Delegates and the people elllgible as beneficiaries of those foods, were mostly Jews too. (The big Welfare~~

Organization In Samarkand was headed by a Pole, who volunteered for reasons of private nature to stay, hut this was an exceptional case.) But I regret to say that it wasn't so. Many learned from their predecessors that it was time for profiteering and aggrandizement. Many had not to learn because they were of low morale and corrupt by nature. They surrounded themselves vith a gang of henchmen and agents, who either robbed the warehouses or obtained the goods openly, sold them and then divided the money. And so it happened that even during this period many people died wither direct or indirect of hunger.

I want to mention only two cases because the men are unforgettable. One was Br. Leib Halm, a lawyer by profession and a great Hebrew Scholar. He was arrested in Lvov, in the first days of the Soviet occupation as a cultural leader and was sent to a hard labor camp. Afrar the liberation, he found himself as so many others, by acme accident in Bukhara. We used to meet him occasionally. Onoe he came to us, his face radiant with happiness. One of those miracles occurred. He met on the street in Buchara a girl who was his little daughter's curse Just when he was arrested. This young lady gave him his little daughter's picture, which he didn't have because the Russian's arrested him at night and everything was taken away from him. He was so happy!

~~A short tine later he received by cable from the Polish Babassy 1200 rubele.~~

~~It turned out that a Polish writer, his friend, working there as a Press Attache, found out about him. He sent him the money and directed him to Gv&sxtf to the~~

~~Polish army center, being sure that he, as anfentsfanding man would be accepted by the army. *(H~~

Everything seemed to be brighter fkx for him. He left for feuwr but after some tine he cane back. The army refused to take him, or to evacuate him otherwise. The money vae of course spent. Be started working ae a night watchman In a hospital. One day while Invited to us to share our meal during Bosh Bashana he was so happy again. He told us, how ho g± digged out «f the cellar of the hospital a copy of the Koran and he was so pleased that he could read it In the original Arabic language. By night he was a watchman in a hospital with epedemic typhus and the daytime he was spending

~~In the attio of the hospital where he could study peacefully the Koran.~~

In spite of the Delegatura and the Delegate who knew of him, and the full warehouse, the man was starving. He contracted the hunger dysentery and not until then was he sent to a convalescent home for invalids organised by the Selegatura. ttafortunately it was ftav too }ate. He could not take any food any more. When I saw him the day before his death, the flies were nearly eating his body alive. He was too weak to chase them away. And he said to me, with his stoical mood and with a smile that never left his face, "you know, those flies are also created for some purpose and, after all they have to eat too." A few friends burled him the next day In the cemetery In Buchara.

~~The picture of his little daughter that made him so happy for a while was found on him.~~

We collected some money among friends and erected a little stone to mark his grave. Maybe it Is still there and if eo, who cares? (the rest of his family was murdered by the Hazis and so a whole family of an outstanding man disappeared from the face of the earth.)

There was another man, whom I will never forget. One day a frail little man with a limp supported by a cane, dressed in something which once could be called a raincoat - it was very cold already - cane to visit his friend ,1 was working with. He told him in his great excitement that he Just received from the Jewish iandnac Labor Committee in U.S.A. through the Polish Embassy in 273

~~Kuybflfshew 1200 rubels. It was the equivalent of $100 USA dollars, based~~

~~on the preference exchange rate as granted to Embassies only. He cams to~~

~~discuss with his friend how to distribute this money. I vas very much~~

~~impressed by the fact that somebody who received money doesn't keept it~~

~~for himself but wants to give it away. It was most unusual under those~~

~~conditions. I asked his friend about the man after he left. He explained~~

~~to me that this man is Mr. Batyst, a former leader of the Jewish Labor movement in the garment center of Tarnov, (Vest Poland). He came there several~~

~~times always happy to report, how he helped out different people with a~~

~~little sum. It wasn't too much but it could buy some family a few pounds of~~

~~bread, and this already was a great deed.~~

~~Sometime later, while passing one of those small winding alleys, I~~

~~saw a mgn carrying a wooden box, with a few men following. I knew what it~~

~~meant; we were already used to this macabre sight. Another victim of the~~

~~great death, who will never see his home again. I noticed some I knew amongst~~

~~the people, following the sinister cortege. I stopped and asked. It was~~

~~Mr. Batyst, I was told, whom they are carrying to tax bury In this strange~~

~~soil. He himself was starving, while distributing the money which he received.~~

~~His body was too weak to offer any resistance to the typhus fever, which he~~

~~acquired a few days earlier. I bowed my head in sorrow and grief, paying~~

~~homage to a great soul in a frail body.~~

~~Many years later, I laarned here in the USA that this humble and modest~~

~~m^ri was one of the most outstanding leaders in the Jewish Labor movement in~~

~~Poland, and became a legend for his tibmz devotion and his selflessness.~~

~~Incidently, a few months later his friend died of hunger too, in spite~~

~~of the fact that the Delegate was his professional colleague, practiced law~~

~~In the same city before the war and waB supposedly his schoolmate.~~

~~And so men died of hunger, while in the same city was a Delegatura headed 27** by a scoundrel, in charge of a warehouse full of food and coraaoditieB.~~

~~People were starving while he and his family were browsing In luxufl#.~~

Be had the audaolty to let for himself and his family, prepare in the kitchen where the others had to fight for soup, white rolls iron American flour, because he couldn't stand any more the dark bread. Be was walking on the streets followed by a bodyguard, because he didn't want to be bothered by people who might approach him and ask him for something.

But there were also exceptions. One of the few was our friend with whom and his family, we lived together and shared our household for a long time. It happened that a friend of his family who was Press Attache at that time at the Polish Bnibaasy at Kuybtjtshev, (now teaching at Harvard) heard about him and on his roccmwndatlon my friend was appointed delegate at first

~~In a Kolchor-center and later after the evacuation of the Army, in Kermine.~~

~~Taking over such an Important place with hundreds of destitute families, he didn't think for a moment to use his position to his personal advantage.~~

Be considered it rather a privilege to be Instrumental in extending help wherever he could. And so he didn't surround himself with a staff of secretaries or bodyguards. Hie modest home consisting of two little rooms was open from the early morning until late at night to everybody who needed material help or advice. His home was at any time of the day and night, full of people. And when the time came later, when the Soviets closed down the Polish warehouses (it will be explained later), then he gave away things which were his private property and was left finally without any means or resources. He enjoyed the praise and respect of the whole population and he really deserved it. (He experienced his greatest satisfaction when at a time when he was In need himself, the leader of a racketeer gang, came to him and offered him financial help, with no strings attached, which he of course refused to accept.) iir

After the army left, our future looked black to us. There vac no immediate help for us In sight and nobody knew, for how many years we would still have to live here. Life was not easy for us. We had to think In terms of a long residence under those precarious conditions. We were vory much concerned with our children, who did not attend any regular school In years. As a result a group of citizens* I amongst them, decided to organize some wort of school. We found amongst the thousands of our people a few, who were engaged In teaching before the war, some in elementary and some in higher schools. We had found even two English teachers. The Oslegatuve provided some money, we found an empty building, which a long time ago served as a Synagogue of the famous Bucharian Jews here and the school was on its way.

Two problems had yet to be solved. There were no text books (the school was conducted In the Polish language) and there were no note books. It was very hard on the teachers, but they had to teach from memory and most of the teachers remembered their subjects fairly well. The problem of note books was solved this way. There were old Uzbekl books available, which nobody was buying. Those books were torn apart and the pupils wrote their homework on the empty pages or between the printed lines. The children and the parents were very happy but the Joy was also mixed with bitterness. It turned out that the Busslan-and Tartar sebeoi boys organized gangs and attacked our school children while going or leaving school and were beating them mercilessly.

It became a serious problem and nobody knew the reason for it. WPB it hatred or envy? ; after all our children behaved and looked differently. We reported to the Militia here and to other authorities, but of no avail. One of the gang leaders lived in our neighborhood and I went to his mother and pleaded with her, but she told me tliat she Is helpless herself. Later on they were not satisfied with attacking our children around the school, but they ambushed 276

~~foar then on street corners at every hour during the day and finally the boys were afraid to leave the home even at daytimm, for Instance to pick up water from the nearby veil.~~

Those were tough kids Indeed, vho could take up with any gang here or anywhere else. They were still of school age but didn't care too much for the school. I eav five to six year old boys already smoking openly (whatever they could use for smoking) spitting and swearing that the older genera* tlon was only shaking their heads. They stole whatever they could lay their hands on. In the beginning of every school year, every pupil received from the school a note book. The first thing they did was they went to the

~~Bazaar and sold the note book and bought for the money Makhorka.~~

~~Besides the Russian public school there were also Uzbek schools where~~

Russian was obligatory. There were no higher Institutions of learning then the public schools. There were some technical courses preparing mostly for railroad work, to which Russian boys and girls were regularly drafted.

They wore some sort of uniform and were under a military discipline. After finishing a two year training course, they were sent away to the most remote places for apprenticeship and had no contact with their families for years.

There was nothing like a high school, a college or a university and In fact, during the three and a half years, where I met thousands of russlans, from all walks of life, with the exception of one old engineer, who studied abroad and the few deported ruesian doctors, I never met any graduate from a high Institution of learning.

In the fall of the eame year our older son, at that time eleven years old, became sick. This time it was typhoid. For the third time we were faced with the eame situation; no medicines, no proper nourishment. The physician looked very serious every time tney came to see him. It wasn't I- 277 very enoouraglng what they had to say. It vae heart-breaking to watch

~~him, how he was lying with high fever, pale and In pain, but he xalways~~

~~managed to pull a anile through hie pains, whenever he saw that we were~~

~~looking at him. This smile could bring us to tears. Ify wife collected all~~

~~her strength and courage to act as normal as possible, to be calm and controlled~~

~~In his presence. But deep in her heart she was full of despair, because the~~

~~physicians did not give too much hope. A strange thing happened during his~~

~~sickness. Be had to be left alone for a while in our room, because I went~~

~~to work and my wife went out to try to buy something for him. A thief- a~~

~~russlan woman - came onto our room at day time and she found nobody home but~~

~~him lying sick. He thought that she was some visitor and turned to her,~~

~~with his smile always on his face, and asked her to sit down and to wait for~~

~~Vcgmfs. It seemed that this was even too much for the tkxaxx thief and she~~

~~didn't have the heart to steal something in his presence. So she walked out.~~

~~The esroe woman emptied completely at the same time the room of a poor Uzbek~~

~~woman, who lived in extreme poverty with two children, across the yard In the~~

~~seme Uzbek mud house. This le how we knew that it was the same thief, who~~

~~visited our home too, because our eon told us about her visit.~~

~~After some four weeks, he felt better but then a relapse came with a~~

~~complication of Jaundice. A miracle happened again. The great love, the~~

~~sacrifice and prayers, during so many sleepless nights, the immense devotion~~

~~of my wife helped him to survive and to recover slowly.~~

~~(The only unpleasant consequence of those terrible days was for him~~

~~the recent fact that he was rejected as blood donor because of the Jaundice~~

~~he acquired at that time.) Life became very tough for us in Buchara. The~~

~~prices for food became higher and higher. We sold everytftang what we thought~~

~~ve could get along without and there was nothing more to hope for.~~

~~There was still the delegatura with the big warehouse but it was only 278~~

a trifle which was distributed. We could only watch in anger the Dele- gate and his henchmen racketeers having a good time. Kuyb^ehevS where all the foreign embassies were at that time, was very far away and even if ecaebody would care to complain, the embassy could do little about it. And so the delegate behaved like a pirate, dealing with the goods meant for everybody as if they were his private property, giving away morsels from hie own rich and plentiful table.

~~As I mentioned before, my friend was assigned as Delegate for the Rayon of Kerminel Be was very busy with the reorganization of this Important outpost where so many families became stranded.~~

~~In order to provide work and employment for as many people as possible,~~

4e organised a soup kitchen, a workshop for repair of clothes and shoes and an orphanage for children who lost here their families, with an adjoining school and a medical dispensary with several physicians, who were left here as Jews, in attendance. All the warehouses inherited from the army were around the station. Once during some night a fire broke out In the nearby cotton mill, with its tremendous stock piles of raw ootton. The Soviets sus- pecting as usual sabatage cane running from all over and the next night my frlond way confronted with the highest MKVD officials and representatives from all government-and communal agencies, who tried to make him responsible for the fire outbreak. His life hung on a hair. Somehow, maybe due to'hie sin- cerity and honesty, they let him go by this time, but they ordered the removal of all the warehouses in twenty-four hours, whioh term was later extended to one week.

In addition to those troubles, he was also plagued by gangs who robbed constantly the warehouses. With all those problems on hand, he had little time to control the activities of all those enterprises and besides he had no time to write the monthly reports with financial statements to the Bnbaeaay. 279

~~Consequently he offered me the Job to become the comptroller of his Eelega- tura and I was only too glad to accept.~~

~~I moved first by myself and my family followed me after some two weeks.~~

Moving from one place to another Is not a simple matter. At first It Is necessary to obtain permission to take up residence In the new place, which was not granted to me so easily, secondly, a speolal permission by the HKVD

is required to travel by train. To avoid this, a private deal hae^to be worked out with the truck driver of some government agency, transporting some goods from a factory to the so-called "Baxa", ( a place of distribution). For a

certain fee people could travel, sitting most uncomfortably on top of some boxes, bags, or hides. It wae already winter time and such a trip in an open truck lasted the whole night. It was quite a strain specially, fof children to travel this way.

A dimt road connects Buchara and Heroine and the land in between is only partly inhabited. We were passing, what was once a very big settlement, but now completely deserted and in ruins. It looked like a ghost town. The Uzbeks were speaking about it In a low voice, rather fearfully. According to their

~~explanation it was a center of the so-called "Baamachi" desperate peasant brlgants, who were revolting against the Soviet rule from 1921 to 1922. Accor-~~

~~ding to their story, Budlenny, now Marshall of the Soviet Ifoion, was sent here with his Cossak Cavalry to break their resistance. The whole settlement was~~

~~destroyed and not a soul survived from the whole population. How the settlement disintegrates into the nearby desert.~~

~~tmmE&EBSBm Now we settled In Kermine, renting a room in another Uzbek mud hut. It was one of those primitive built huts where it was cold In winter and hot in~~

~~summer, and the rain was Just pouring into our room during the rainy Beason~~

~~and the water had to be collected from the clay floor in buckets. 280~~

Onoo my family had even to move out for three days but X had to stay there, because everything would be stolen over night. So I put up a tent In our room from canvas, borrowed from our Delegatura, and in this way I spent the nights.

For nearly two months our life was quite comfortable because our friend, the delegate, believed that everybody Is entitled to some sustenance and at least to the bare necessities of life. Ve received our allotments of food in kind and at least we were not hungry for a while. I introduced some control system and I brought the reports which were missing for several months up to date, Unfortunately this spell lasted only some three months.

~~It broke up suddenly and unexpectedly in April 19^3 • Bare is what actually happened:~~

The Basis, during their occupation of Russian territory, informed the world in 19^3 about their discovery of a mass grave of several thousand Polish officers, massacred in the forrest near Katyna. As it is known the Haxls accused the Russians and the Russians accused the Basis of this beastial

~~crime (U.S. Congress is conducting recently an investigation of its own) The~~

Polish government in exile, after an investigation conducted on the spot by the International Bed Cross, accepted its findings that the Russians committed this unheard of crime, unknown in modern warfare. As a result of it, the

~~Soviet government broke off their diplomatic relations with Poland and the~~

~~Polish 4mbaBBador left with its staff, Russia. The Russians in turn, stopped~~

~~immediately the activities of the Polish-Welfare-Organization, closed down all its warehouses and confiscated all the goods they found there. And so,~~

came the activities of the delegatura*e, to a sudden end and with It my work there. We were informed that the Australian delegation in Moscow (at that time the Embassies moved back from Kuyhstsheir) took over the protection of the Polish citizens in Russia. This situation lasted only a few weeks. 281

Tho Australian legation with ite snail staff consisting of only on© or two officials couldn't possibly handle the problems of hundreds of thousands of people, who turned to the Australians with all their problems and overflooded them with letters and cables* The Busslan authorities refused to grant the Australian-delegation permission to increase their

~~staff. After some time again a new institution took over the protection~~

~~of the Polish citizens. It was the "Komltet Zwiasku Patrjotow Polskich"~~

~~(the federation of Polish patriots) headed by a one-time famous Polish ; writer Madams Wanda Wasileveka, who turned communist after the occupation~~

~~of east Poland by the Soviet. (Movie'"Rainbow" based on her book, describ-~~

~~ing the Nazi occupation and cruelties In Poland, was quite popular here~~

~~in recent years.) The Colonel Zygaunt Berllng, mentioned before, belonged~~

~~to her cemmitteo and was charged with the organisation of another PollBh~~

~~army, to i>e trained by the Russians and to fight on the Busslan side against~~

~~the Rails in Europe. The "Komitet Zwiazku Patrjotow Polskich" was the first~~

~~step to the later Polish Soviet Satellite government called "Polish Peoples~~

~~Republic."~~

~~How we were left with no rasanB and no work again. We had bread ration~~

~~cards IfOO grans per person, but not every day was bread sold. As an average~~

~~during the month, only on twelve to thirteen days, we could buy bread against~~

~~our ration cards. It was far worse than in Buchara, where occasionally on~~

~~one day in a month the bread was missing, but as a rule bread was sold to~~

~~eyoxy resident everyday* It seems that in saaller places distant from the~~

~~bigger oenters, with higher government authorl^the local leaders did not~~

~~care too much about what the population would think and how they suffer.~~

~~And so nearly every second day, there was no bread, but bread was available~~

~~on the black market. The only difference WBB that Instead of paying one rubel 28S~~

~~per kilo you had to pay from thirty to thirty-five rubela. In addition~~

~~to it a complete whimsical order was issued by the local authorities to~~

~~the effect that only people working can obtain bread ration cards for them-~~

~~selves cand their children only, not for their wives. So I had to look for~~

~~vork whereever I could get it, not even inquiring about working conditions~~

~~or pay, Just only for the bread ration cards.~~

~~In the meantime our Saeter holidays caste closer. This is the way how~~

~~we celebrated the "holiday of freedom." My friend, when still being a dele-~~

~~gate, had in his warehouse a small amount of KaniecheVitz Matzos in one pound~~

~~packagesXthe same as they were distributed amongst the Poles while leaving~~

~~Russia.) He distributed those Matzos, one pound package to every family.~~

~~Those Matzos were eagerly bought by the Russians at the Bazaar and for the~~

~~equivalent ve could buy one and a half kilo of rye flour. With those one and~~

~~a half kilo of flour my wife went to a place, where some pious Jews organized~~

~~in a primitive way a Matzos bakery a few days before Passover. In odder to~~

~~have those one and a half kilo of flour converted and baked into Matzos, my~~

~~wife had to help out there the whole day and late in the afternoon she brought~~

~~our Matzos home. There were four for everyone of us, altogether sixteen dark~~

~~Matzos for the whole holidays and when we sat down in the evening for the~~

~~first Seder, the usually pronounced sentence according to the old ritual "this~~

~~is the bread of the poor" had never before in our lives had such a significant~~

~~meaning to ue as then, when our little family, huddled together in a Uzbek~~

~~mudhut, forlorn and forgotten by the whole world. 283~~

~~I started looking for vork, one of the government enterprises here.~~

There vere not too many here. A bakery whioh would have been an Ideal place to work In - at least I wouldn't have been hungry, but only people with pull and good connections could get in there. A few little shops where Uzbeks **-te /•fa- were with merchandise from cotton textiles. One day the rumor was spread out that the Soviet authorities were starting to manufacture some canned goods and hands will be needed. Some of our friends who were in a similar situation found out that actually there will be no food factory or cannery but turtles will be slaughtered and the turtle meat somehow preserved and shipped somewhere. The whole thing sounded rather appalling and gruesome to me. already After another few days I heard that some people actually started

working and fantastic stories were told about the earnings in money and specially in kind. I was wondering how a factory could start manufacturing in a matter of a few days but strangdly enough it seemed to be the case. As far as earning was concerned, I was told by some of the people 1 visited that there Is a bread ration card and a few rubels a day, but the most Important thing was that people brought home every evening some forty or fifty turtle them eggs and several turtle livers which tasted according to tksax like chicken eggs or liver. I couldn't bring myself to a point to look even at those eatable livers, not to speak of fcssttsg tasting or eating them. But still people brought them home every day and ate them with great relllsh. Our good ladles origi- nated even some recipes how to use those eggs with a little flour for aakrtx making omelets, noodles and other useful dishes . They regretted only that the turtle eggs were of such nature that only the yolks could be used and the egg clear had to be discarded, because it did not coagulate when boiled or cooked. All those things I knew from tka heresay.

~~tty conscience bothered me. Why should I be so choosy and sensitive? 283»~~

While my family and I were going around hungry, the others had a grand time eating those turtle eggs and livers. So I pulled myself together and decided to go to the "factory" and to apply for work. Here ID what I found there. A big yard enclosed by a vail made from mud. In the middle were two pits dug out with thousands of turtles crawling one on top of the other. The turtles vero of different sizes and weight. Some were big weigh- ing from 6 to 8 lbe. some half a pound or even lees. The"factory" consisted of several wooden tables. Men and women stood around those tables, every one with a knife In his hand dissecting those poor creatures. Blood was all over. On the side stood two drums filled with water. This was the place where the turtles were killed. It was done this way. The turtles were thrown into the water. Being submerged In water the turtles put out their necks and tried to come to the surface. In this moment the man standing In front of the drum grabbed the turtle by Its neok with one hand and with the other he cut off with the knife, the little head. It took the men sometimes several minutes to do it, because the knives were not sharp and turtle skin is very tough. The men who did the bucherlng was a lawyer by profession. Seeing it

~~I felt sick. I saw black circles in front of my eyes and nearly fainted.~~

~~Sy But I had a strong will to overcome this faint feeling and softness. If not for myself, so for my family's sake. And so I stayed and asked for work.~~

I was accepted because they needed men. As It turned out later the Uzbeks* and the Tartars, who are Moslems, wouldn't accept any work there. I got a knife as a tool of my work and a place at one of the tables. Ae the first killed turtle reached me and I touched the still pulsing muscles I nearly collapsed again, (the turtles are so tough that not only the muscles are reflecting afterwards for a long time, but also their hearts are still beating). For my whole life before I could never touch or even see raw meat. I was always warned that meat was handled before I went Into our kitchen. But I had to pull myself together again and so I started working together with many others 281*

~~with my hands trembling, full of blood, and blood all over everywhere.~~

~~At the end of the day I brought hose my share of turtle eggs and livers equally divided amongst those working at one of the many tables.~~

~~How about those turtles. Bow did they get there? Here is the story as we learned it while working.~~

In the nearby mountains around Kermine are caves and in a certain time of the year and at certain hours before dawn, the turtles are leaving their hiding places. According to the local legends the tubtles lived some 200 years or more. The Uzbeks living here know about their habits, catch them alive and bring them to the russlan government agencies in KermineO where the

~~Uzbeks receive payment in kind according to the weight of the delivered turtles.~~

During our time they received for the equivalent some cotton textiles, dark flour , salt and tea. The Interesting part of it is that the ease Uzbeks who caught and brought them to our working place, weee full of contempt and despised us who touched and handled those turtles. For some reasons they cone eidered the turtles as unclean and we who killed and ttA dissected them became unclean too. The Tartars who are Moslems too had the same attitude towards us. It came so far that they refused to stay with us in the same line in the store of this organization where we received our bread, for our bread ration cards. They were looking down at us as some sort of outcasts, untouchables.

They said that we are even lower than dogs because dogs don't eat turtle meat which was true. Hungry dogs, which could eat everything, sniffed at the turtle meat and wouldn't touch it. How were those turtles used? The turtle shells which are normally used as material for decoration purposes mostly for ladles combs and handbags, were yt«* first spread out for drying on top of the roofs of the nearby mud huts.

Then they were thrown from one place to another until they were completely burned by the sun , became brittle and had to be discarded. The eggs and the livers ware in the beginning distributed among the workeae. The turtle egge Lees 285

~~pre were supposed to be/reserved and shipped to the army or to some labor camps working at the water-dam In the -vicinity of Tashkent.~~

I am very doubtful whether thie turtle neat could ever be used for human beings under normal conditions. As I mentioned before we were working in an open yard at some 90 degrees 7. or more with millions of flies around.

~~As soon as we left the meat at the table for a few minutes, specially during our rest period, it was completely covered with a layer of white fly eggs.~~

~~Those turtle eggs were thrown at the end of the day into barrels with salt~~

~~»kix. And after a day or two we could see and hear the millions of worms which found here in the meat and in the barrels an excellent breeding place.~~

I mentioned before that the eggs and livers were in the beginning distributed amongst us. It seemed that the ruesians thought that we had it too good and so they forbid us to take them home in spite of the fact that those materials were so perishable under the prevailing conditions, that they hardly could last longer than a day.f£ They preferred to throw them into the earn© barrels for the worms. So we worked out different devices to steel them every day* We brought along with us in our pockets, little tin cans and while working we put the eggs and livers In those cane. During our rest period we smuggled those cans through holes In the surrounding walls to somebody from every family waiting at a certain agreed time outside. I beg forgiveness from

~~•*+* my sons even now, for using them as aocompllses for this plot, because~~

~~it was the only way to still our hunger and to survive. Some of us were caught but it didn't discourage us from doing the same thing the day again.~~

~~I and my family got used to our new nourishment consisting of turtle yolks and livers and started even eating the meat itself. While working at~~

~~this turtle buchery my family was at least not hungry. The work at this~~

~~"canniag project "lasted only six weeks because no more turtles were caight and'~~

~~brought in by the Uzbeks. 286~~

All those pits with thousands of turtles, butchered in barrels of water* pip- ing for air, with people working around tables soaked with blood are coming bade to my memory whenever I see people rellishing in restaurants the "Turtle Soup" ordered as an exotic luxury. No turtles for me! Xt became quite hot and we oould not use our little Iron stove indoors ^ any more. Our elder son wath the assistance of his younger brother, built a « little stove outdoors from some old bricks and clay. It was quite an ingenious 1 structure because it was very economical as far as the consumption of wood was o concerned. It had also an additional feature. The little chimney was built \ <( In such a way that it oould be used as a warm plate at the same time. I had to look now for another Job* I was told of another enterprise which ^ was supposed to start in the near future. A wine factory was to be built and the & russians were looking for men to prepare the brick for the factory. We were 5 promised that after helping with the construction work we would be employed later

~~0 as the wine manufacturing. * My friends and I wore willing to work there first because we would get the~~

\ bread ration cards, secondly the gasp prospect to work in a place/ where grapes i will be processed looked very promising. When we reported to work we were led to a back yard of a small building and » the russians pointed to the ground and informed us that this will be the place i > where the brioka will be made by us. People who were looking for a brick yard

or IH;IW were greatly disappointed. There waa no such thing. We had to dig a big hole in the solid ground then we poured in water, dug more soil and made heavy mud by treading It with our bare feet. The mud was then thrown out with shovels over the bank of the pit. Eere it was put into wooden forms for two bricks. The forms provided with two handles were then emptied and Hold out in rows at another place of the same yard for drying. Hext day the sun baked bricks were collected and put up in piles ready to be used as building material. This way of manufacturing bricks was even more primitive than In biblical times. Egyptians added at 286 A

least straw to tho mud. (See Exodus , flhapter 5 ) The trouble was that the soil dug out froa the took yard was full of pleoes of gloss, wood splinters and rusted oans and nails, and everybody working In this pit while treading the mud, cut his feet and toes. There was always the danger of Infection. 287

After ve accumulated some fifty or more thousands of those bricks ve were told that ve have to put up a building for the mvk machines. Neither the russlan forman nor anybody from us knew how to go about it. Somehow ve managed to put up four vails with a big opening left in the front vail In order to move in later the machine equipment. Then an old man came vho was a builder, carpenter, and ve helped him with the roof construction. Severer when ve started to lay out the logs and planks on top of the vails the vhole building collapsed. Fortunately all of us were busy on top of the roof and so nobody got seriously hurt. Then ve started all over again and this time under the direction of another "Spec" , the building vas reinforced vlth genuine old bricks obtained from some other place and the building stood.

The working conditions were very strenuous. We were vorking through the hottest time of the year which reaches some 100 degrees F. all the time exposed to the burning sun. The Uzbeks better adjusted to their climate didn't work in the afternoon but we of course did. I remember how I once coming home from work tried to get off my shirt but only shreds were left In my hands; the sun burned it to pieces. Of course I dddn't earn during the vhole time as much as it would cost to replace this shirt but It didn't matter. The bread ration card for my family was more Important. The new russlan foreman was a vine specialist , vho vas sent here to take over charge of the future production. He vas a discharged war vefeeran still veering his uniform and as an ardent communist he did not show too much sympathy for us westerners.

Now the machines had to be Installed. When ve were asking about the machines, the Spec pointed at some pile of rusted Junk laying there all the time. Those were the presses to be Installed for vine production. It turned out that the Spec didn't know himself to go about it. I have had in my life already some experience In machines and visualized among the rusty parts laying around that there is a heavy vertical hand press and another snail type horl-

~~oontal press vhich should be driven by some sort of motor. 288~~

Z became so quite helpful In putting those parts together. Of course everything had to be done with our hands with only a fev tools around and ve taunt had to life even the very heavy wheels and plates with our hands shoulders and vhatelse you had. While moving the upper part of the press the whole burden fell on my side. In trying to prevent it front falling on people I reached out ray right hand In order to support It with the result that the heavy press crushed ray finger. I vent to the Ambulatorlum bleeding finally and my family was quite shocked when i/carae home with my finger still bleeding through the heavy bandage. I was unable to work Immediately after the accident and I didn't get paid either. After a few days, while still attending every day the dispensary for treating of my finger, the nxx russlan spec fired me, ridiculing ine for wearing the bandage and cancelled the bread ration card for me and ny family, as being no more employed. This happened here thirty years after the Bolshevik revolution in the "Workers Paradise" In a country concerned supposedly only with the welfare of the working class people.

I am wondering what would happen to the boss In our capitalist system when he would venture to fire a worker under similar conditions. )$r expectation that I will be rewarded later with work in a wine factory failed so for no fault of my own. The"factory "actually started seme weeks later with production, drapes Kolchoz were brought 1R or Arbae by the Uzbeks from the neighboring SBXEBOC - vineyards.

~~The men working there liked their Job. At least they could eat as much grapes as they could and they also managed to bring some home.~~

The factory needed more men and with the help of one of our men who became some sort of foreman there I was hired back. I never in my life saw such heaps of grapes. Those grapes were really marvelous. They came in different sizes 289

shapes, color* and flavors. Some of them were big like walnuts. The lady- fingers were really finger long. I really don't know vhat makes those grapes so different and taste so good. Maybe it le the skill of the Uzbek farmer as a result of a centuries old tradition or the particular noil or the climate; possibly all those three factors together. t»e«w ••at I eaw myself at those grapes which I couldn't afford to buy and sga ate so much of them that I developed In the first few days a terrific stomach disorder and I couldn't stand them any more . The only advantage was that I could get some grapes every day for my family. This wasn't intg legal of course. We had to steel and smuggle them out. Here again I had to engage the help of my boys and I begged them for their forgiveness again. It wag the only thing they had to eat during this period of time.

~~The work was heavy there. All the grapes brought In during the day had to be pressed Immediately and nothing should be left over for the nest day.~~

~~Ve were working twelve and fifteen hours a day without being paid any overtime.~~

~~Those grapes delivered by the Ttebeks wore their yearly contingents in kind, figures out In advanoe by the representatives of the state. The xsaat. ruosian~~

~~specs checked weight and quality of the grapes and gave everybody a receipt .~~

~~For the delivered grapes they received money to the official price of 35 Kopecks /~~

~~per kilo. Whatever surplus they had after those compulsory deliveries they~~

~~sold on the free market 35 rubels per kilo. (Rote the discrepancy between the~~

~~official and private price)~~

~~Every Uzbek who brought In the grapes tried to please the Specs , eome~~

~~brought evon gifts like chickens and eggs along, lest he could reject the grapes.~~

~~I witnessed a case when an old Uzbek woman with the help of a young boy brought » i, in her grapes guota. 'The Specs refused to accept them because he didn't like~~

~~the quality. The old woman was standing around the whole day crying and~~

~~begging him, she explained that her son was taken to the army, she herself is~~

~~a widow and too old to work and only the little boy is helping her out. 290~~

This Is the reason why the grapes were not up to the standard. It was In heart-breaking to vatch the old vonan msA tears and kissing his hands hut he definitely rejected the grapes adding some russlan curses for good measure.

~~Still sobbing and crying there was nothing left for her but to take them back.~~

~~It vas even too late to sell them becauso it vas already nearly dark and the~~

Bazaar was closed. She vas desperate because she knew what she could expect for not delivering her contingent. As punishment, she has to deliver namely the same amount In raisins or go to Jail. Of course It vas plain meanness on the part of the Specs because her contingent could easily be added to the big mountain of grapes. A personal gift would have done the trick I am sure.

~~But maybe the old woman didn't knew about It or simply couldn't afford it.~~

~~The production itself vas very simple and primitive. The grapes were pressed with those tvo presses,ane by band and the other driven by an oil motor.~~

~~The vine Juice vas filtered and then yropfcax pumped Into big wooden barrels In-~~

~~stalled In the yard In open air.~~

~~The motor uf the presses were tended by a friend who was running a small machine shop at home. He did his best but he couldn't help that everytime~~

~~something else broke down. The presses were very old, kept for years In an~~

~~open yard and besides there were no spare parts. He had to lubricate the bear-~~

~~ings of course and there was no grease, so he had to use the same oil as for~~

~~the motor. SklBscmulx The snail press which needed frequent lubrication had~~

~~no cover and so happened that once a part of the oil from the bearings being~~

~~very light, splashed Into the grape mash. It happened after we left for home,~~

~~working there some fourteen hours. The same night, he was awakened up and~~

~~ordered to come immediately to the factory. When he arrived there he was con-~~

~~fronted with the representative of the MKVD and all the local civilian author-~~

~~ities who accused him of sabataglng the vine production. He vas accused that 291~~

he deliberately epilt In the machine oil in carder to spoil the vine. The poor fellow who told me the story the next day had a very hard time to explain to those offiolale,who looked at him with very grave and synister faces, the situation and they finally let him go.

~~THE SOVIET RUSSIAN "IBS VITMSI"~~

I mentioned before that under the earns difficult living conditions, the russians knew better how to adjust themselves and to survive. Here is how*

~~Working as a "free" man, In ruesian enterprises I had more chance to learn about the Soviet economy as I had In previous years working as a prisoner.~~

~~I learned to understand why the russians when looking for work somewhere, don't~~

Inquire about wages or working conditions but are interested only In the kind of merchandise produced or manufactured, there. The most important thing is what they can take out or to put it in plain language, what can be stolen? n n Take an example of the wine factury I was working xxfc in. There was a Specs the discharged veteran who possessed only the army clothes he wore on his back.

Besides him a manager came into the picture who moved in with his family into the house belonging to the factory. After same time when the wine ripened a bit and became drinkable, the situation of those two men changed completely.

The russlan Spec bought himself civilian clothes and luxuries like a watch available only for big money on the free market, and the manager's family was having a cook, kept as worker on the payroll of the factory. Meat and akxxak chickex were cooked every day. This was done on a stove put up for the summer

In the open yard (it was too hot to cook in^doors) in the jatmrnmasmm. presence of the workers who sometimes for two days had nothing to eat because the bread wasn't distributed even on ration cards. I would have never believed that people could have such a disregard for the feelings and opinions of their co- workers. It seemed as having once a chance they wanted to grab as much as they could. 292

~~How was it dons? Very simple. They sold the wine or rather exchanged~~

~~It for other goodjj. There Is a very popular and generally accepted device called "Bint" ( there is sadc no translation for It in any language). What ie it and. how does it work?~~

Suppose somebody is in charge of the vine factory like in this case and Jte wants to have meat. He gets In touch with the manager of the meat plant or slaughter house and asks for It. Hhen asked how he Is going to pay for it, then the answer is, "PO BLATU" and both parties know exactly what it means. It means that he will give him wine In exchange. The same goes for flour, soap, sugar , leather and whatever there is to get. Of course there are several others who have to bo out into the deal because the manager cannot take out by himself half of a calf or a barrel of wine or a sack of flour. Also the GLAV-BUCH who is responsible for everything has to be a partner in the deal. Bow if this procedure goes on for a long tine, there must accrue quite a serious discrepancy between the books and the actual inventory. In order to straighten out those figures two different procedures are applied. One Is to write a statement, signed by the responsible official to the effect that the shortage was caused by some loss in production or some other plausible reap-on. It is called ACT SPISAT it means, to write up a document. The second way is tc find some small man , a worker usually, who happens; to take out or to steal something and then this culprit is accused of having done it all the time and m&ke him responsible for all aocummnlated shortages. Two Instances which took place In my time in Kermdne will explain this procedure. There was one bakery In town which had to take care of the bread supply cf the whole population. As I said before only on twelve or thirteen days In a month, bread was sold on ration cards and there was no bread during the rest of the month. However, bread was available In the black market all the tine 293

and It WAS also known that the wife of the manager of the bakery was buying whatever she oould through her agents and helpers, like slips, from the bakery. Houses, shoes and furs and paid for it with flour/ A blouse of my wife was dbrit sold this way for two kilos of dark flour. This was going on for months. One day a worker was ftntt caught while taking out a loaf of bread and the poor fellow was sentenced for many years in prison because he was made responsible for all those thefts.

In another cate a physician from Lithuania was involved . n? was in charge of the medical care of a large "SOTOHOZ" in the vicinity of Keroiina* which wes a big cotton growing center, (a Sovchoz le an very big form completely state owned end does not even pretend to be owned by the farmers as it is the case with a Kolcho?,.) The whole population there suffered tremendously from Malaria because the swamps around this place were an ideal breeding place for the Malaria carrying mosquitos. At one time nearly 3o£ of the population were sick and their absenteeism from work was abnormally high. The physician was helpless and he insisted that petroleum should be sent here to be sprayed over the swamps. This is an old but effective method to combat Malaria at its brooding place. The petroleum arrived but was sold on the black market by the Ssntisaac Sovchoz officials. Baoauns Malaria van hitting the population harder than before, the physician was accused of contre- revolution and sabatage, was made responsible for the goes poor health of the that he deliberately lot population and put into prison. Be was charged w±tkxB*aDra3i*itfetafit*feik the Malaria dineaee spread out in order to make the people unfit for work.

~~I don*t know what happened to him. At that time when I left Kermine he was still held in prison incomuunicando , with hie family left in black despair.~~

~~From time to time our papers bringing news reported after pxxas> ruoeian newspaper, hew one or more officials of an Kolchoz or a factory wore arrested.~~

~~because of erabozzeJment of a larg e sum of money or for selling illegally some 29~~

~~products. Those are the accumulated shortages resulted from the "Blat" and those particular won were chosen to be the victims of those deals which probably were going on for years.~~

~~This Blat institution in a way regulates and elleviatee the fal4iey and ax Inefficiency of tha Soviet economy and it became its integral part.~~

Without the Blat and all its unethical implications, the ruesians would not exist and survive. It reaches into the highest Quarters. It becacns an official way of keeping things going. Even on the level of the heavy industry, the big bosaea have to resort to the Blat, In order to obtain the raw naterials to which they are entitled in order to fulfill their coraait- raents according to the ''five year plan". Even to get the money from the

Qoeebank in time, the Blat has to be applied. Of course not everybody ia in a position to work out a deal "PO BUTU" for instance a teacher or a post clerk who has osfchxg nothing to offer but the majority can. Nobody bothers with the fact that seme innocent people will suffer and that they themselves can become victims of the scheme. As a russian explained to me, everybody here is with one loot in prison anyway, eo at least let's live today. The EPICURAIC slogan "CARPE DEEM" becane also their motto.

~~PASSPQBTI2ATIGH -~~

We wore harraased not only by the uncertainties of work and the daily bread but also by sane other actions which were decisive and fatal for our future or oeem to b© GO at that time. flte As I mentioned before, we had the status of three men liberated from

~~prisons and camps as Polish citizens according to the Stalln-Sikoreky agreement and everyone of us had a dooument "UDOBTOVTBHSGE" to this effect. Now~~

~~after the severance of the diplomatic relations between the Soviets and Poland 295~~

In connection with the KATJN-MASAC3B-DI3CL0S0KE in April 19k%, tha Soviets decided to change our statue. Rumors reached ue that the ifW.aiane are eager to make ue become Soviet citizen". Here Is the story of that sinister action undertaken l>y the Soviet Militia an high authority In the fall of 19'>3* called pasp-Dortizatlon.

~~One day two militia officers arrived in Kencine and an order was given that every one of ue had to appear before them with docuiitente proving our~~

Polish citizenship before the outbreak of the second world war. Sons brave men went first, the othere decided to wait and see. Frcta the reports of those who laced the militia officers with their doctunents we could nox deduce what were the rules and the governing principles of their decisions. There ve»e

~~cases when people -presented the same Identical Pollen pra-war document, like blirth certificates, passports, identification cards with confirmed citizen-~~

~~ship (ve had to have plenty of those documents in Poland) marriage licenses~~

~~etc. with the result that one man with bis whole family of course was declared~~

~~a foreigner and the other waa urged to apply for citizenship. Chore wore cases~~

~~where people had only very few or very little doowaontation, (after all, people their lost during their escape, documents or left them "behind.) and were declared as~~

~~foreignere. And others, who had. most of their docufflents were considered as~~

~~Soviet citizens.~~

~~I reneiaber distinctly two characteristic caDea. One roan had no documents~~

~~whatever. In his ingenuity or rather despair, he brought a Jacket irom a suit~~

~~In whir* there was still a label free his tailor sewn in with his address and~~

~~a date, (some tailors used to Mark their craftsmanship this way) asxgmdt proof~~

~~that on Beano date in 1939 he was r.till in Poland . This man wee declared as a~~

~~foreigner. A day later a young lady came along a teacher oy profession who~~

~~presented all the document!! a human being could have in order to prove that he 296~~

is alive. She wars told that she surely will beccme a 7017 good Soviet citixan because slw kept everything In such fine order and "besides they need good taacliora. After a few days thoee two officers left and another contingent arrived with the same roealt. So nobody knew In advance vhst is going to happen to hln and hie family and Many epent sleepless nights before and after the Interview.

The ge&eral inproesion was that those officers decided not according to ecaie law or rulce hut only at their whim ami siood. It war, rleo evident that the tendency on their part prevailed to declare ac isany as poerihlfi nf? Soviet cltisano.

~~Vhat happened tc theco fev Groups. The lucky onee who wore declared as foreigners rvcfeived a ac-callod "fTO UA ZXTELSR-70 3XA TsycSTRA17^f7V',' ecrae~~

•ort of paiii-t to take up retider.cc' here z.?. foreigner/?. It wan a little blue card with a picture valid only for a certain l-.'iie after which the document had to bo again coiifinaed. The second group had to apply for Soviet oitfr.en- ship. flere we experienced something which wo had never known hefore. ve were used to the ideu that tha citizenship is a precious privll

~~But not in Soviet Kuneia. Those people were ordered , were compelled to fill out the applications. People considered the Soviet citizenship as a cataBtrophe~~

~~and a personal txiitfady. People knew from the past what happened t<- Soviet~~

~~citizens and were afraid at the carw fate. Boraa They were scared to death at the mere thought that tliey would never he allowed to lenve ftiasia, even after~~

~~the aar oiioe tiay becaue Soviet citit-eae.~~

~~And GO ia the beginning soros people refused to sign the application and west hone. Ilia next day they were arrested and were kept In pri«cm until they~~

~~broke down and signed the applicateioa. 297~~

One girl we knew who was here long and had all her family abroad thought she had nothing to lose and deolded to resist. She was arrested and put into a cell together with prostitutes and thieves and was boatan up by them every day. Given nothing to eat for several days and suffering from lice she acquired there, aha had to give up and ask to be brought before the Militia officers to sign the application, for Soviet citizenship.

~~During the tine when those things were going on we bad our family meet-~~

~~ing to discuss this grave matter and to decide what to do. Vfe have always~~

~~In our little family discussions when serious problems had to he decided.~~

Our boys were at that time 10 and 12 years old. Everybody knew including our boys the Importance and the implications of the problem which was since days discussed In every fatally day and night. Both boys were of the opinion that wo should rather go to prison than to"apply" for Soviet citizenship .

I was never more proud of them* I mentioned this unforgettable day with this grave decision as a tribute to their seriousness and maturity at this tender age. The people who applied or were rather compelled by sheer force to apply for Soviet citizenship, received Soviet passports, some for six, seme for differences twelve months and some for five years. Nobody knew why those frttrgyacag were made. However, In every case it was considered as a big tragedy and the homes of those people had tne atmosphere of mourners. X knew of a case where a respectable lawyer who received a five year passport took this fact ro to his heart that a result of his brooding about his prospective fate that he will attack never be able to leave Russia, he actually died on a heart ^^w^fm^ a short time after. When my wife an X were finally iadatatkmaA. Interviewed we were amongst the lucky ones who received their "VXD HA 2XTELSTV0" . This was a miracle by itself but a forerunner of one still greater to follow.

~~Altogether ecsae 10$ of all our people received those foreign documents .~~

~~All the others were declared as Soviet citizens. Reports reached us at that time from other towns and centers of our people about the passportixation with 29B~~

the only difference that In some places nearly every one was ccaapolled to apply for Soviet citiaenehlp and In others more people receiver, the document for foreigners*

As it turned out some two jfcaare later all thot?e decunents lcet their ( slgnlflcance and all the worries were for nwwjht as It happens frequently *

~~In Russia. According to the agreement between Rurala en.-"* tho new Ptlioh~~

~~Peoples Republic everybody who was a Polish citieen before the var was re- patriated to Poland , 807let passport or not Soviet pr.r sport.~~

~~Aftc all the grapes in the uta& wine factory were delivered and pressed also the most of v.c were relieved and lost ajrrrtfrasra bread ration cards. The Spec~~

~~in the factory left & sinf.11 crew consisting mostly of people who could be~~

~~helpful in />olllag the sine "PO SiAStf'~~

~~Tar a than I vsa working as a floor sweeper and watchman in a Publid enough to pa.7 the S.^3.0-I.. '_Tiaro was vei-y little money paid, Just szragtiocBJQngkk bread from~~

~~rule ar, I nentioaed before, there was no more than twelve and thirteen times~~

~~a month brsai sold, 400 grams per person, (one pound equals 453 grams)~~

~~v;orking la Lliiu school 1 had a chance to watch the youngsters. Most of them~~

~~Slaved 11!KJ UrcJdna. Ve lived near-by and so they saw once how our elder~~

~~son vV.o vav slating in our yard, was looking over some of his stamps which~~

~~he vat collecting. 3e had still some left after he sold a big part of it~~

~~In Bucbara in order to buy his Wttamy a birthday gift. Two of thoee school~~

~~boyc &j>-cachet! hiia, and aBked to have a look at them because they have stamps~~

~~too and wanted to exchange them. Our eon ,good natured as he is, and In good~~

~~iOttM si,.cwed the two russian boys his collection, while one of them pretended~~

~~to be interested in then and engaged our son in a conversation, the other grabbed 299~~

~~the whole collection and ran away , the first following him lamedlately.~~

~~Tou can imagine whet It meant for cur joy to lose his stamps which he~~

~~collected vlth so much love as only a bey his age can do. He was heart-~~

~~broken. He can't look at eteups from that time and loet all his interest~~

In them. I was always wondering why the* orphanages in Russia are always eoae- where far av/ay from a nearby town. She boys in those institutions ore not always orphans, Most of them iuu away from home and were later picked up somewhere in the streets. People who were working in those orphanages told ue the moat horrible stories how they actually turn theifc to become criminals. In fact they were always a Menace tv the nearby town and in days when they

were offt or in other times vhan they run aviay without peziolssion, they ewarm to the Bazaar and stole everything thoy oould lay theli: hands on. I rjyeelf grabbed ten rubels which was twice a -victim of their pilferage. One© a hoy grotegtrahfteoapiteaca I kept in my hand already to pay lor iiiik at the Sazatsw.

Our boys had no school h«re which they GQUIU. attend. Setae friends tutored them voluntarily and iaf oraaHy. I aa still grateful to two of them, (fcie was teaching tbsm European history from SiSaory ani the other himself' a ymwgnc young Btudent taught mathematics with no text book whatever. The deep knowledge and the willingness of those our ffiondis a&ve our boys a good background and helped to f ill out the gap ksdatsaK caused by the lack of any regular schooling. In the school The Job as sweeper and vatchtaan*"cliuu, l last too long and the misery loomed

~~at UE again. It neeued as if we would have arrived at the end of our road,~~

ntl our rencurcea vero exhausted and nothing to look foivard to. There was nothing more to sell. Ity wiie had a winftei sport coat and she decided to sell it a long tijae ago but ti,ere were no buyers for it. The color was maroon but t..e Soviet ladles liked only the black or blue color, ax the coat had a fine fur lining beneath, but the ruaoiau ladlea preferred the fur on top. 500

A man came along who teauMed between Heroine and Samarkand and did what the Rusalans oalled "speculating ". Be uaed to baring Vodka and Makhorka hare which he aold to the Russians and took sane other goods from here to Samarkand.

~~His dealings were of course Illegal according tojthe Russian law and even he made a good laving this way, he was always In danger and exposed to blaoknall fey the~~

Russian Militia. He was a likeable and helpful fellow and he took ny wife's winter coat which he was sure he could sell In Samarkand, Unfortunately we did not hear from him any more. Ve learned later that he sold the coat but got sick and had to use the money for himself. There was a winter coat gone and the money too .

~~One day we die covered that aetually we still had something to sell. Those~~

~~were our golden wedding rings which my wife and I wore faithfully for fifteen~~

~~years. Z particularly was proud of the fact that I never took off my wedding~~

~~ring since the day we got married* So we decided to sell them. The man who bought~~

~~them did not mind the Inscriptions Inside of the rings. It was a hard day when~~

~~X came home without them, our fingers bare. The money obtained so did not last too long considering that we had to buy~~

~~the most essential things like bread, flour and some milk on the black or private~~

~~market. Potatoes were a luxury. From two pounds my wife made soups for four days.~~

~~In a short time we arrived at the same dead end. Looking through our belongings~~

~~my wife found that our younger boy has an extra shirt. So she took the tiny shirt~~

~~and went to the baxaar. Every time somebody came up to look at the shirt and touched~~

~~It, It hurt deeply. I don't know why but I couldn't help thinking of Joseph's little~~

~~shirt when the brothers stole him. Finally some Uzbek bought my son's little shirt.~~

~~Vto boy was waiting for me at the door of our back yard and when he saw that I am~~

~~returning empty handed, he was running back to his &feny bringing with Joy the good~~

~~news. " Peppy sold my shirt • He was so glad because he knew that it meant bread~~

~~for a few days. But my heart was so heavy like stone, and everythlxgwas crying~~

~~deeply In me. 301~~

~~I sold my own child's last shirt knowing that X would never taooc hers~~

~~In this land T»e able to buy another one Instead, not now and not in the future.~~

~~It was the bottom of our misery. I couldn't look In my wife's sad eyes the whole day.~~

~~In this situation when everything looked so helpless, unexpected help came.~~

One day a man came with a letter. The letter contained a large sum of money, and came from the young man in Buohara from whom my wife spared some soup during the time when he recovered from typhus. The young man earned some money while making,in some sort of private enterprise, leather boots and wanted us to share his wealth. Ve were deeply moved. Ve never expected any reward . I think that

~~it never happened before that a few plates of soup given In time of great need to a poor sick boy, were repaid with such an abundance. After all, men are good.~~

On the sixteenth of December, 19*0, the greatest of all miracles happened to us. With the help of our family and friends abroad , our family received permission from Moscow to leave Russia. F On the lSth of December, at 30 degrees fiamlkalfc ksttx below zero, we crossed

~~in the mountains of Chorasaan the border between Russia and Iran (Persia.)~~

~~On the snow capped peak of an 8000 feet high mountain, ten yards away from the Russian border barrier, we said our prayers of thanks, to God for this greatest miracle of all. TO MT SORB~~

It has been always In my mind to write down our experiences of the war years and specially of the years spent together in Soviet Russia as a result of our deportation*

It Is true that you were little children at that tins and that you possibly forgot most of it. The years which we lived here since are growing over those sad memories* Maybe it is even good so*

~~Z believe that there is a purpose and sense for every human suffering. Maybe~~

~~It was for the others Just as well as far ourselves.~~

Going back to those pages from time to time, you might find that the problems you are confronted with In your STSBBMKS present life are after all, not so Im- portant as compared with those of the here described bygone days* It might be easier to solve them. Turning to those pages from time to time you might even find a different outlook at things and a different perspective of values •

You know dear boys /that I didn't have too amen time to write down those memories. I had to work all the time to keep our small family alive* 80 X wrote on trains, buses and subways. 6a week ends and -vacations, during sleepless nights when the 5| ghastly years came freshly back to my memory. Those notes dashed down on so many occasions, have developed in some sort of a book.

I don't knowywhether this is a book Recording to the literally yard stick*

Maybe it is not, there is no plot here/as required from every book* But I do know, that it contains real life, yours and mine, and the lives of thousands of others who felt pain when they suffered and smiled when there was a ray of hope and a spark of goodness around them. Maybe it is a book after all. Some time later, while working In an American-relief and welfare agency in Teheren (Persia) X received the following poet card.

"the 19th of April was the first Anniversary of my father's death (Engineer A.) I am a little boy nine years old and do not go to school because I have no shoes. My little sister died the 10th of this aonth. On the grave of ay little sister Is the snow very very high. Yesterday we couldn't find the little grave, and my mother cried bitterly. "My mother writes so often to our relatives In U.S.A. but nobody answers. Please Ityedya answer my letter." (translated from Russian)

~~As £hls book shall be a living monument for the thousands of graves of people who came here not of their own will and died here before their tine, far away from their homes and their families.~~

~~Nobody will ever find their graves, covered by snow in the North and by the quicksand In the South.~~

~~Nobody will ever bring a flower to their graves. that May this book be a prayer km those times shall never ooae to pass any more.~~