W e e k

e n d s c e n e

providing awareness for wildcat students paws issue 3 Contents

Introduction...... 4 Feature Story ...... 5 Alcohol...... 8 Marijuana...... 12 Casual Sex...... 15 Acquaintance ...... 19 Statistics...... 22 Conclusion...... 23 PAWS Staff Gabi Abaci ‘16* Montana Fowler ‘15* Aly Dembry ‘15 Ben Haderle ‘15 Kieran Horan ‘15 Caitlin Cozine ‘16 Grace Santangeli ‘16 Jake Rubnitz ‘16 Matt McCurrie ‘16 Sean Clark ‘16 Maggie Horan ‘17 Nitin Srinivasan ‘17 Advisor Nancy Offer

* denotes editor ≠≠≠ Thanks

Our staff would like to thank the Los Gatos High School Administration for their help and guidance. Finally, a huge thank-you goes out to all the experts who took time to speak with our writers.

photography labeled for reuse BY GRACE SANTANGELI & MATT MCCURRIE

Introduction scenarios. These are accurate tellings of what may occur on the weekend, from hanging out Introduction with friends to attending a party. They focus on elcome to the third issue of PAWS: the many influences on teenagers on the week- Providing Awareness for Wildcat end, including the pressures and consequences. Students. Our goal is to bring light For more information on alcohol, see Aly Dem- to issues that are too often left bry and Nitin Srinivasan’s article. Caitlin Cozine Win the dark. We do this by raising awareness and Kieran Horan discuss marijuana. They clear about disregarded aspects of adolescent life. up misconceptions about marijuana and explain We will expose students and parents to these how it can affect your body and mind. Montana aspects, show the existence of common prob- Fowler and Jake Rubnitz discuss casual sex be- lems, and provide suggestions on how to han- tween couples or strangers over the weekend. dle them. Ultimately, we intend this magazine to They also discuss how quickly judgement can be be eye-opening, current, and, most importantly, forgotten in the heat of the moment, as well as the helpful. We hope that people recognize the re- numerous regrets from the spontaneity of casual ality of the situation, both locally and national- sex. Then we venture into the issues of acquain- ly, and that they will be compelled to act if they tance rape. Gabi Abaci and Ben Haderle focus ever encounter these issues in their own lives. on a very important idea, that only “yes” means This semester’s publication addresses the “yes”. Finally, Grace Santangeli and Matt McCur- weekend scene and all the experiences that a rie compiled Shifting Perceptions statistic cover- high school student may become involved in. Our ing all of these elements of the weekend scene to feature article, written by Sean Clark and Mag- provide accurate facts and to provide a broader gie Horan, depicts several hypothetical weekend understanding of how common these issues are. 4 BY SEAN CLARK & MAGGIE HORAN Feature he throws up several times before passing out. This has happened three weeks in a row and his Story friends are starting to get sick of having to take hen we thinkStory of the “weekend scene” care of Michael when they drink. Assuming he we think of partying and problems. will be fine, his friends leave him in the bathroom, However our perception of the week- oblivious to the possibility of alcohol poisoning. W end scene diverges from the reality. There is no typical weekend scene for the LGHS Jacob student body. The weekend scene is a spectrum that ranges from isolation to alcohol poisoning. To Jacob’s group of friends have been par- start off this PAWS issue, we are providing sever- tying since the beginning of freshman year. Now al fictional stories to demonstrate this spectrum. sophomores, Jacob and his friends have a year By doing so, we define what the weekend scene of experience with casually drinking at kick- is and when it becomes a prob- backs. At first, their kickbacks took lem. These are realistic stories place every couple of months. The that can and do occur at LGHS. "his friends are friends become more and more ea- ger, so their kickbacks became a Michael starting to get monthly event, and soon enough, Michael shows up to weekly. They manage to balance school on Monday morning, sick of having to school and partying; their actions where he greets his group of have seemingly little backlash. friends in the upper junior park- take care of ing lot. As all of his friends talk Sarah about the weekend’s kickbacks Michael when and hookups, Taylor pulls a bottle they drink." Sarah is entering her senior year of smirnoff out of his backpack. and her friends are beginning to par- They take turns passing the bottle ty. She stays away from it for a while around until the bell rings. This routine continues due to her lack of interest in drinking. throughout the week. Friday after school, Michael She decides to go to her best friend’s birthday and Taylor decide to drive to a small kickback at party, knowing that alcohol will be present. She a friend’s house where they will continue to drink. tells herself she will not drink, but when she gets Michael, who has maintained a steady buzz since there, her friends encourage her. She caves and tutorial, plans to spend the night. As he polishes begins drinking. After several shots, Sarah begins off Taylor’s bottle of smirnoff, he begins to feel talking with Ryan, who is just as intoxicated as sick. His friends help him to the bathroom and she is. They wake up next morning in the same 5 bed, with no clue what went on the previous night. “you’ll like it.” It was the first time she had Sarah shows up to math on Monday, know- ever smoked weed, and she did not know if ing she has to face Ryan. They are not friends she should. Hannah wanted to, but had heard and have not talked since that night. His friends some freaky stories about what happens when snicker as she walks in and sits in her seat next you smoke weed for the first time. It took her to him. “How was your weekend, Sarah?” they a while to build up the courage to smoke it, but tease in a mocking tone. At tutorial, her friends she eventually did. Her mouth became real- ask her for details about the hook up. She is faced ly dry, but she started to relax. It seemed like with an overwhelming sense of guilt when she all of her worries about school were gone, and realizes she cannot even remember the details. she could just relax. For a while Hannah just sat and enjoyed the peace. The next morning, hav- Rebecca & Alex ing slept it out, Hannah felt completely normal. BY SEAN CLARK & MAGGIE HORAN Rebecca and Alex have been in a relationship for a year. Jane Sex has been on their minds, "She is faced with This summer, Jane’s friends but they have not made any de- started going to country con- cisions yet. One weekend, the an overwhelm- certs at Shoreline Amphitheatre. two show up at a casual party; October rolls around, and Jane nothing out of the ordinary. After ing sense of guilt decides to go to the last concert the two played three games of of the season with her friends. beer pong, their judgement has when she realizes During the concert, Jane finds completely disappeared. The herself abandoned by her friends couple wanders off to a room she cannot even who are now hooking up with ran- and begins hooking up. In the remember the dom guys across the lawn. Willing heat of the moment, they decide to try new things, Jane decides to go all the way. Waking up the details." to hook up with a guy who ap- next morning, Rebecca and Alex proaches her. On the way home immediately regret their deci- with her friends, they each talk sion. Rebecca worries throughout the next week about the guy they hooked up with. Jane is glad about the potential complications her drunken she went with friends and joined in on the fun. and unprotected night with Alex could cause. Emily Chris Emily and her friends decide to go Chris is not one for parties and does not bowling on Friday night after the football get out much. His weekends consist of him mar- game. They pile into Adam’s car and make athoning netflix and procrastinating on his home- their way to the bowling alley. After play- work. In his senior year of high school, Chris has ing two full games, the group calls it a night. found that his classmates have developed im- permeable bonds. His friends are not so much friends, just people to sit with at lunch. He feels Josh like he does not have anyone to turn to when he’s Josh and his pals agree to go to the movies bored or lonely. The weekends feel like 72 hours on a Saturday night. They drive to the Oakridge of boredom and isolation. Without friends, Chris Theater, buy their tickets and candy and go into finds high school life to be dull and uneventful. the movie. They see a new comedy and laugh really hard the entire time. Afterwards, they all drive back to Josh’s house and spend the night. Hannah They hang out and talk before they fall asleep. “Just do it already” her friends urged, 6 These fictional stories were written to show LGHS students can and do choose different activ- the variety of ways teenagers spend their week- ities to occupy their time. All choices have reper- ends. Drinking and smoking can have tremendous cussions, and some can be serious. These sto- consequences, however that does not mean there ries are meant to convey the variety of scenarios will always be consequences. Many of the more involving drinking, smoking, and other weekend common repercussion are social or personal. habits that LGHS students partake in regularly. There is no “right” way to spend the weekend;

7 Alcohol BY ALY DEMBRY & NITIN SRINIVASAN Alcohol here are two sides to alcohol in high I abide by the “work hard, play hard” philosophy. I go out school: choosing to drink and choos- every weekend. Sometimes I D.D., but most of the time I’m drinking. I hate when people preach about how bad ing not to. However, things are not al- alcohol is and how teenagers shouldn’t drink. I’ve made T ways as black and white as that. There at least twenty friendships from drunken endeavors and are many factors that can go into a decision to I’ve kept my grades up in the process. Drinking is an drink just as there are many factors that can in- easy way to release all that pent up stress and emotion fluence a person’s decision not to drink. Adults in a fun and social environment. Plus, you get to see a can tell us not to drink and warn about all the whole other side of someone when they’re drunk. For future consequences, but many of us are still example, I recently discovered that one of my good guy friends can’t hold his alcohol whatsoever. This as you going to do it. However, it’s important to realize can imagine makes for some pretty funny stories. Sto- that if you do choose to drink there can be many ries that wouldn’t be possible without the involvement consequences including that fact that since you of alcohol. So is it bad for teenagers to drink? Not if are under 21, it is illegal. Also, alcohol influences they’re mature enough to understand the consequenc- teenagers differently than adults; it is a proven es. Alcohol is awesome. - Reality Check April 2014 fact. That being said, some teens will drink re- gardless so it is important for us to know alco- I choose not to drink alcohol for the similar reason I choose not to smoke weed. I don’t like how it makes hol’s effects and understand how to drink safely. people behave. I’ve been around drunk and high peo- ple more than once, and I’ve heard from those drunk and high people afterwards the good and the bad re- Choosing to Drink sults they associate with drinking. My friends who drink Most teens know the consequences of and/or smoke into excess end up having sex they bare- drinking. We know that it is illegal and that it ly remember or having ridiculous hangovers the next can have many negative side effects and yet morning. In my opinion, I don’t need to look like an id- iot stumbling around drunk or laughing my ass off to many of us still choose to do it. So why? What have fun. I can dance around like a lunatic and have draws teens to alcohol, sometimes to the ex- meaningful sex and forge real, honest friendships and tent that they go out and party every weekend? relationships without the help of a substance. Some 1. It is a stress reliever. Our lives can be very high schoolers think they need to drink before they can stressful with schoolwork, relationships, sports, go to college, just to try it out. I understand that per- family etc. and drinking can be a way to just forget spective. But I feel I can stay sober as long as I want, about all these pressures for a while. When you whether it is until college, until I turn 21, or forever. - Reality Check April 2014 are drunk, you are not thinking about the project you have due the next week or the fight you had 8 with your mom about your grades. Drinking can help prevent many students from breaking down. Short & Longterm 2. Makes social interaction easier. Alcohol re- duces our inhibitions and helps us feel more con- Effects/Consequences fident and makes it easier for people to go outside their comfort zones. This is one of the reasons In the short term, alcohol can have many why alcohol has been called “liquid courage.” positive effects, otherwise why would people do 3. It is a coping mechanism. Alcohol can help it? As explained before, it can be used as a stress ease the painful emotions of a situation. While reliever and it can help make people more confi- drinking occasion- dent. However, most of us only consider drinking ally to forget about as a normal part of the weekend scene, but fail "People do not small problems like to contemplate the effects of alcohol in the long school can provide a term. Over time, we could become completely usually post pic- temporary escape, if reliant on alcohol in order to partake in regular your normal reaction social interaction, and we may not even realize tures of them- when confronted with it. Some may find themselves, without alcohol, something scary and socially undeveloped and considerably awkward selves and their stressful is drinking, as compared to those that have been sober. this is when drinking Long term dependence upon alcohol may also friends when they to forget becomes develop into addictive behavior, or alcoholism. a problem. This de- The long term effects of alcohol and alcoholism stay home on a sire can be an indi- can be quite harmful to the human body and its cator of depression biochemical reactions. Relationships have a ten- Saturday watch- and/or addiction. dency to dissolve when alcoholism is involved, 4. Peer pressure. and it can also increase thoughts of suicide. ing movies. " It can be hard to at- tend a party or hang Decision Making out with friends and not drink when everyone else is drinking. Saying “no” is not easy when Because alcohol inhibits complete you do not want to seem “lame” or “uncool” thought processes, what seemed like a in front of people whose opinions you value. good decision last night, will probably not 5. Social media. With the emergence of more turn out to have been a very good decision and more social media sites where pictures and when looked at from a sober perspective. statuses can be posted letting everyone know On New Year’s Eve my friends and I decided when you are at a party or drunk, it can seem to be cool and avoid the normal LG mountain rager, like all everyone is doing is partying. People and instead we decided to hit up my friends frat do not usually post pictures of themselves and party...It was pretty damn awesome I got way too their friends when they stay home on a Saturday excited there, and my friends kept telling me, “Don’t watching movies. This constant bombardment of hold back, it’s New Year!”...I don’t remember what party pictures and descriptions of all the fun your happened that night, I don’t remember who I slept peers are having can lead to jealousy and the de- with, I don’t know why I didn’t get alcohol poison- sire to go out and have the same experiences. ing...But what I do remember is making a fool of 6. It is fun. Most of the time for us it is as myself, courtesy of my friend’s camera. She has pic- simple as that. Alcohol makes people loud- tures of me with so many different guys, and I feel so er, more confident, more outgoing, and be- disgusted with myself. - Reality Check March 2010 cause of all this it can make it easier for peo- ple to have a good time with friends and peers. Drinking to the point where your deci- sion-making skills are significantly inhibited can lead to many regrets the morning after including,

9 2 but not limited to, meaningless sex with people you do not even know, driving while under the If it’s an emergency… influence, and fights with loved ones and friends. Call 911 Also, can be a huge issue If you need advice… when a girl (or a guy) is too drunk to say “no.” Call Poison Control Center Drinking & Driving 1 (800) 876-4766 If you need a ride … Drinking and driving is always a bad thing, no matter the circumstances. It may not be the Call SafeRides easy decision, but it will always be the better 1 (888) 550-7433 one to call a parent or a friend to pick you up. or Yellow Cab The consequences of choosing this will be much less severe than the consequences of driving 1 (408) 777-7777 drunk. Alcohol impairs your judgement and your reflexes are slower. It is physically impossible with the person until medical help arrives. when you are drunk to be the same safe driver If you are having difficulty determining whether you are when you are sober. Drinking and driv- an individual is acutely intoxicated, contact a ing can lead to a DUI, or at the very worst can health professional immediately. You cannot af- lead to the death of you, a passenger, or even ford to guess! a complete stranger if you get into an accident. A DUI goes on your permanent record, can in- clude jail time and a fine, and will most definite- Differences Between ly make your insurance rates go up. The pun- ishment you may receive from your parents for Adult & Adolescent drinking may be bad, but it will always be better than taking someone’s life. It just is not worth it. Brains One of the reasons why teens may drink al- Alcohol Poisoning cohol is because we see adults drink excessively, and think it is ok. However, many teens are un- Excessive drinking can lead to alcohol poi- aware that alcohol affects their brains differently soning, which could end up being fatal. Because than adult brains. Emotional maturity and prop- everyone’s tolerance level is different, there is no er decision making continue to form throughout set amount of drinks that is going to result in al- one’s adolescence. It is not that we always make cohol poisoning. However, it is important to real- bad decisions, it is just that we are bad at making ize that throwing up is the first symptom of alco- decisions in the moment. At the same time, teens hol poisoning, and it may or may not get worse. are also susceptible to the feedback they get from their peers. We are more likely to do things that The Signs we know are “wrong” if our peers are doing them too and we want to fit in. Something very import- • person is completely unresponsive ant to know is that our brains are more vulnerable • seizures than adults’ to the effects of alcohol on learning • bluish skin or fingernails and memory due to our stilldeveloping brains. • less than 8 breaths per minute The earlier on you start drinking, the more sus- What to do ceptible you will be later on in life to alcoholism.

Turn the person on their side and place a pillow in the back of their neck. If they resist, sitting them upright will serve the same purpose. Stay 102 For the College Bound Class of 2015 Shift Stats How often do you think the typical For some of us, our last year in high school is upon us. Next comes college and with LGHS student drinks alcohol? it, more freedom, bigger parties, and more al- Only 22% think typical students cohol. Freshman year in college can be a very Rarely/Never drink dangerous time for some people. It is very likely that you will be bombarded with many oppor- About how often do you drink alco- tunities to drink, but whether or not you choose hol? to take them is up to you. College is a lot differ- 66% Rarely/Never drink ent from high school. You will not have a spec- ified curfew or your parents waiting up for you when you come back home. This can be an Have you ever driven under the in- incentive for people to drink more excessive- fluence of alcohol? ly. Freshman year can be especially dangerous Yes:11% because real connections with people have not been formed so you don’t have your best friends watching out for you at a party. Because of this, 57% of the senior class rarely/never extra care should be taken when you are drink- drinks alcohol ing in order to ensure that you will still be safe. Conclusion LGHS Students Choose Teens do drink. Partying is a huge part to Drink Because... of high school culture and it can affect anyone, whether you choose to drink or not. If you do “I have chosen to drink alcohol because choose to drink, you should know your limits, have a safe ride home and be with at least one we do it safely and it provides us with a person who will be there to help you if needed. It means of having fun.” is also very important to recognize that there are consequences that can result from drinking. High “I choose to sometimes drink and smoke school is a time to have fun, whether or not there because I feel like it is what kids my age is alcohol involved, so it is up to each individu- do.” al person to make the decision for themselves. Not to Drink Because... Myth: “I’m not intoxicated enough for alcohol to affect “I have chosen not to drink because my my driving skills; its ok to do it just this once.” family has a history of addiction to alcohol Fact: and I don’t like the environment that comes When you’re drunk, your judgment skills are severely impaired, so you may think you are less with drinking” intoxicated than you actually are. “I have always chosen not to drink alco- Myth: hol...because of the overwhelming guilt I You can sleep off alcohol poisoning. know I would feel if I ever dsapointed my Fact: parents.” Alcohol poisoning cannot be reversed without immediate medical attention.

11 2 BY KIERAN HORAN & CAITLIN COZINE Marijuananotification. Depending on the amount, punish- ments can range from a $100 fine to 6 months jail time for 18 year olds. No teen imagines going Marijuana Although legal in several states, to jail just for smoking with their buddies, but it marijuana remains a controversial is a very real possibility for constant users. The drug that teens turn to. Almost 50% bottom line is smoking weed is illegal in the state of students will try smoking mari- of California and presents a huge risk for users. W juana in their time at LGHS. While it isn’t surprising that teens like to Facts experiment and smoke, many choose to smoke daily and can’t get through the day without it. 4% • It damages the heart and lungs. of seniors reported that they smoke daily in 2014. • Regular smokers have increased incidence of This number has decreased 10% from 2013. shorter tempers, anxiety, depression and even While smoking appears popular psychotic episodes. in Los Gatos, the vast majority • Marijuana use can affect your still abstain. In fact, 57% of the "57 percent of ability to learn. senior class reports that they • Younger people are at greater risk never smoke or rarely smoke. the senior class to develop psychological addiction. These numbers clearly demon- • THC is fat soluble and stays in strate how the silent majority reports that they your body for up to a month. abstain from smoking at Los Ga- • Marijuana reduces white blood tos High School, despite the ste- never smoke or cell production. reotype that all students smoke. • Recent research shows that mari- While teens at Los Gatos rarely smoke." juana use can lead to dependence do choose to smoke, that does and can produce withdrawal symp- not remove the negative side ef- toms. fects of smoking. The benefit is a short-lived high, but the cost is risking your future and social and Occasional Use familial relationships. Everyone has heard about the mental and physical side effects, but peo- Marijuana, Weed, Grass. Whatever you ple often overlook the biggest risk. Even if you call it, we have all heard of this drug. This is a disagree with the , the police can arrest you topic many teens like to joke about, and most for smoking or dealing and the punishments can people tend to brush off the consequences of be harsh. Getting caught with weed on school marijuana. High school is a stressful time where property is a mandatory suspension and police our days are jam packed with classes, sports, 2 12 homework, tests and extracurricular activities. to rehab for drug abuse. The ugly truth is that It seems almost impossible to go a day with- these people were put into rehab because their out hearing talk about college and SATs/ACTs. drug addiction got out of hand. While not every- Everyone needs a break from time to time one who uses marijuana becomes addicted, when to avoid going insane. Some kids choose to use a user develops a need for the drug, that person marijuana “casually” to relax and get away from has become dependent on the drug. This is a sign the pressure that comes with high school. For of a drug addiction, which is the habitual taking some people marijuana is a gateway drug. Stud- of drugs in an amount that is harmful to yourself ies have shown that many people who use more and others. While substance abuse may start off serious drugs like heroin and cocaine started off as a bad habit, it can become an actual disease. using marijuana. However, not everyone who uses The problem with taking drugs is that over time, if marijuana becomes a cocaine addict. A student the drug use continues, activities you once found from Reality Check confessed that he “started fun can become less fun and drugs may become smoking daily, sometimes alone necessary for abusers to feel when I was stressed out. Rather “normal.” When a person reaches than just on weekends I began "Rather than just the point where they need to take smoking weed every day before drugs despite the problems it caus- and after school. That led me into on weekends I es for themselves and loved ones, crack.” Many teens only think of then there is a serious problem. the short-term consequences began smoking A sign of problematic use can for their actions. Smoking weed be found by the clinical diagno- right now will relieve me of my weed every day sis test established by the Amer- stress and make me feel good, ican Psychological Association. so what’s the big deal? Even before and after though states like Colorado are school. That led me • Has your drug use led to an making marijuana legal for peo- increase in tolerance? Does it take ple over 21, this does not change into crack." more of the drug to achieve the the potential psychological ef- same effect? fects of Tetrahydrocannabinol • Do you experience any with- (THC), which is a chemical found in marijuana. It drawal symptoms from a discontinuation of use, can affect your brain development, increase anxi- or do you use any substance that minimizes the ety and depression, increase heart rate, harm your effects of withdrawal? lungs, and can even affect reproductive systems. • Do you ever use more of the drug, or use the The truth is marijuana can help some peo- drug more frequently than you had intended to? ple feel good in the moment. You can forget ev- • Have you tried and failed to cut down on your erything for a while and relax. However, marijua- drug use? na does affect people differently. No one really • Do you spend a lot of time using, thinking about knows how marijuana will affect you. Everyone using, or recovering from your use? This is consid- has a different level of tolerance.. Some kids have ered to be a preoccupation with the drug. had life-threatening side effects. While some • Has your substance use caused you to stop people can smoke weed recreationally, others doing worthwhile or enjoyable activities? get uncontrollably addicted to it. According to • Have you continued to use even in the face of the National Institute of Drug Abuse, what starts adverse health or social consequences? off as seemingly positive effects with controlled drug use can spiral out of control over time. If you truthfully answer “yes” to three or more questions about your actions over the past year, then you are addicted. Heavy dos- Frequent Use es of marijuana can delay the start of puber- These days, it is hard to walk past the mag- ty and even disrupt normal monthly menstru- azine aisle without seeing another celebrity going al cycles. Studies have also shown that one

13 2 joint is equivalent to two to five cigarettes. need to talk, listen, find info, or seek help if you Here are some important resoures if you have a possible addiction.

142 BY JAKE RUBNITZ & MONTANA FOWLER

Casual Losing your is always depicted as a Sex beautiful moment between two people, nev- er as the embarrassing, raw, nervous ordeal it asual sex at partiesSex is spontaneous really is. For most girls, there is no regret, and without much thought, so if you de- they actually care about the person they’re with; cide to go to a party, especially with I’m not most girls. All I wanted was to get rid of C alcohol or drugs think about where that pure little girl image. - Reality Check 2009 you stand sexually before you go. Making sex- ual decisions in the heat of the moment can My buddies tell me about their sexual con- lead to serious regrets or consequences. quests as easily as if they were describing the weather. “What’d you do over the week- end, Joe?” Joe might say, “Oh nothin’ much, The Double Standard Frank, I just hooked up with this hot freshman What’s the reputation of a guy who has sex with Sally.” Frank would say, “And how’d that go?” lots of girls? Manly. Tough. Getting it. And Joe would say, “I don’t know how many What’s the reputation of a girl who has sex with times she’s had sex, but it was good—she’s lots of guys? Slutty. Easy. Losing it. hella loose though.” - Reality Check 2009 What’s the reputation of a guy who chooses not to have sex? Unmasculine. Weird. Not Getting it. stereotypes and societal limitations prevent us What’s the reputation of a girl who chooses not from thinking about the decisions equally. High to have sex? Prude. Goody Two Shoes. Not school guys may brag or lie about having sex putting out. over the weekend, while high school girls may feel ashamed or lie about having sex. When both The double standard refers to the differ- genders make the choice not to have sex, the ence in reputation between genders despite boys are often viewed as weak and not “man- both making the same decisions about sex. The ly” enough, while girls are considered prudes.

15 It is also important to remember that, al- though rumors about a girl having sex might damage her reputation, rumors about guys not Approximately 20% of teens admit to participat- choosing to have sex when presented the op- ing in sexting whether receiving, sending, seeing, portunity also might damage their reputations. taking, or sharing promiscuous photos. Though sexting is often perceived as girls asking for at- tention, guys will often request the photos and Alcohol & Casual Sex pressure the girls into sending them. Possession One of the worst sexual decisions I have made of child is a serious offense that will was my first sexual experience when I was un- follow charged teens for the rest of their lives. der the influence of alcohol. All it took was a call from some friends and an invite to my first “par- law ty,” and there I was facing the decision to not only If the photo is of a person under the age drink for the first time, but also to become sexually of eighteen and falls under any of the below de- active with a girl that I met. - Reality Check 2011 scriptions, it is considered child pornography. • includes the child’s genital region The mixture of sex and alcohol can lead • is sexually suggestive to regret. Some casual sexual encounters among • the child is posed unnaturally or in inappropriate Los Gatos students occur while at least one attire partner is under the influence • the child can be nude, semi- of alcohol. When drunk, people BY JAKE RUBNITZ & MONTANA FOWLER clothed or fully clothed make decisions they probably "There I was fac- • indicates the child’s willingness would not make while sober, so to engage in sexual activity it is no wonder that “hookups” ing the decision to • is intended to elicit a sexual re- while under the influence of al- sponse in its consumer or viewer cohol can cause regret. Having not only drink for sex is a big decision, and alco- hol does affect our judgement. the first time, but Too often, people mistaken- A “yes” while under the influence ly think others than the intended is not for sexual activity. also to become recipient will not see the photos When drunken hookups even if the receiver promises to occur, the intention is often just sexually active keep them to himself or herself. to drink with friends for fun, not It is impossible to be sure. Snap- to have sex. While drinking we with a girl that I chat, contrary to popular belief, must be aware that our judge- is not a secure method for sex- ment is affected. We are able to met." ting. There are other applications think about what we want in the like SnapHack that allow users moment, but the future is not in our thoughts. We to save snapchats Snapchats can try to prevent drunk sex by asking friends to without the sender knowing. Also, in January pay attention to us so we can avoid regrettable 2014, a group of hackers released 4.6 million sexual decisions; however, depending on friends user names and phone numbers from Snap- to take care of us is not 100% successful. Your chat’s database. It is called the WORLD WIDE friend may feel uncomfortable stopping you when WEB for a reason, so make smart decisions. the time comes; you may even convince him or her that you want to have sex while you are under Pressure the influence. Because our judgment is impaired, we can make decisions under the influence of Lack of Consent alcohol that we would not make while sober. A common misconception about con- sent is now being promoted by a campaign to change the anti-rape slogan from “No means 162 No” to “Yes means Yes.” Consent for sexual in- There are many experiences in life that can only tercourse only includes a sober, clear “yes.” If be understood if you go through them. Hav- you are put in a position where you feel uncom- ing an abortion is one of them. Until you have fortable, it is crucial to speak out and say so. had one, you will never understand the fright it If you feel pressured into saying “yes”, or if feels to enter down the long and cold hallway you are pressuring your partner into saying “yes” of the hospital. You will never understand the to any sexual activity, this is not consent. You sound of the medical treatment sucking up the should only engage in sexual activities when both life that you have created. you will never under- partners are sober and not feeling pressured. stand the emptiness that a mother is filled with upon leaving the hospital with the beauty of life Mismatch of Emotional Ties gone… forever. I always thought that if I ever One of the major problems with casual got pregnant that it would just be so easy. Go sex is a miscommunication of emotional con- to Planned Parenthood and get an abortion. I nection. While teens in relationships may discuss was so ignorant, so naive, so wrong. I have to how they feel about sex beforehand to make wake up everyday with the burden of what I have sure they are on the same page, casual sex does done. No one knows. Me and my ex boyfriend not usually involve these emotional discussions. are the only who are aware of what I have done. So, you had sex with her at the party last If you get anything out of this letter don’t feel sor- weekend? Where do you stand now at school ry for me. I was stupid. I thought I was in love on Monday? Does she want to go out with you, and I had unprotected sex. Now I have to live or does she think it was a one time thing? Does with the consequences. Please do me a favor. she even remember it? These are questions that Please be careful. You are not invincible. I never result from casual sex without a conversation thought it would happen to me. I never thought it about what sex means to both parties involved. would effect me this much. - Reality Check 2001

Consequences vices to help women make this import- ant decision. In California no paren- Having casual sex may have a higher risk of tal involvement is required for an abortion. physical consequences, because of its spontaneity. Sexually Transmitted Diseases Pregnancy You are also more likely to get an STD Without protection, girls risk getting preg- from casual sex than relationship sex because nant. If you get pregnant when you are not in a re- you are less likely to know his or her other sex- lationship, the situation can be much worse. Teen ual partners, and you might not have a condom. pregnancies have the ability to derail future plans. Casual sex can be risky. We need to consider If you are planning on engaging in sexual ac- if it is really worth it, and if so we need to use tivity or decide to go to a party where there is protection. Getting tested for STDs is simple a possibility of having sex, you should prepare and advised if you had sex without protection as best you can to prevent pregnancy if having or with someone other than your regular part- a child is not your goal. There are many forms ner, even if you do not show symptoms. Vis- of birth control to prevent pregnancy. Minors it your doctor or local Planned Parenthood to can visit Planned Parenthood to get birth con- get tested. Parental permission is not required. trol without parental permission. Information on specific birth control can be found at http://www. PLANNED PARENTHOOD plannedparenthood.org/health-info/birth-control Blossum Hill Health Center If a girl does get pregnant, she has three options: 5440 Thornwood Drive Keep the baby. Suite G Give the baby up for adoption. San Jose, CA 95123 Have an abortion. Phone: (408) 287-7526 Planned Parenthood has counseling ser-

17 2 a homosexual student will encounter at most ten Regrets other students with the same orientation as him. This is worsened in high school by the fact that People who do have casual sex normally do not many LGBTQ teens are still closeted. With so few reveal to everyone what they are doing because options, homosexual teens are often faced with they do not want to have the label placed upon the decision between causal sex or no sex at all. them as being a slut or player. - Reality Check 2005 Since queer sexuality can coincide with higher incidence of hook-ups, LGBTQ teens are I thought I could act like most guys and turn off at a greater risk. Since the romantic pool is so my emotions, turns out I was wrong. When he did small, LGBTQ teens not call a week later, I noticed myself feeling real- will take greater ly hurt. Then I realized I could not convince my- sexual risks. Many With scarcity and self anymore that I did not care about having sex times, LGBTQ teens with him. I was so ashamed of what I had done, will find romance on secrecy, LGBTQ like I had betrayed myself. - Reality Check 2005 the internet, wheth- er through explic- sex is a "slightly I lost my virginity when I was fourteen to a boy it hook-up apps or who pretended to love me. I’m sixteen now, and dating sites. These different game." I still haven’t really gotten over it. No matter what internet connections people tell you, listen to someone who learned are much more dangerous for obvious reasons, and from experience: sex is a BIG deal. It’s not the pu- can leave LGBTQ teens vulnerable to predators. rity or religious values that matter in the end. It’s Also, homosexual teens know they cannot how sex can break your heart into a million piec- get pregnant. This has a counter-intuitive effect es and how something so amazing and incredible and can make for less safe sex. Many times, pro- can turn into the last pathetic remnants of a failed tection is associated with birth control, and they relationship. Sex is the most emotional thing you are seen as one in the same. Homosexual teens will ever do with someone. - Reality Check 2011 recognize that they have no need for birth con- trol, but they do not always recognize that they The possible regrets of casual sex are do need protection in order to practice safe sex. specific to individuals. Some possible re- Additionally, many LGBTQ teens (closeted or grets include a changed reputation, pregnancy, not) will use alcohol to ease the stress and STDs, or heartbreak. While not everyone hav- tension that society places around LGBTQ ing casual sex will regret their decision, alcohol sex. This increases the likelihood of a hook- can blur the possible outcomes of a hookup. up (which may be the motivation behind the drinking) but also increases the risks associat- LGBTQ Sex ed with sex. Like their straight friends, LGBTQ written by an anonymous student casual sex has its own set of potential risks. LGBTQ teens tend to spend most of their adolescence in the closet, where they keep their Conclusion sexuality a secret from their peers and family In the end, the decision to have or not have members. This, coupled with scarcity of LGBTQ casual sex is personal and should be treated with individuals and the absence of birth control, respect. Before putting yourself in a situation makes LGBTQ sex a slightly different game. where your judgement could be impaired by al- First, since LGBTQ individuals make up a rela- cohol or drugs, take precautions and think about tively small portion of the total population, the where you stand beforehand. If you ever feel the dating and hook-up pool is smaller. Numbers slightest bit uncomfortable with any sexual activi- can be eye opening here. Being generous, about ty, speak out and make it clear that you do not want 5% of the population identifies as homosexual. If to proceed. For more information on acquaintance we are to apply that number to the class of 2015, rape, read Gabi Abaci and Ben Haderle’s article.

182 AcquaintanceRape BY GABI ABACI & BEN HADERLE cquaintanceRape rape is one of the most mis- teenagers, we often assume that we are safe understood components of the weekend among our peers, and we do not expect any of scene. If you were to ask people whether our peers to be rapists. It is important to always A or not they thought rape was okay, you be alert and aware of the people around you. would get “no”s across the board. If you asked Be cautious around people who are aggressive, those same people to identify a rape scenario at a violent, and often invade your personal space. party, it would become much harder to find a sim- A party scene is the most common setting for ac- ple answer. The truth is that a lot of occur quaintance rape. It is unsafe to put yourself in without people understanding what is going on. environments that are unfamiliar to you. Try to Rape is sex without consent from both partners. always stick with a group of friends because you Rape is seen as “taboo” at a lot of campuses, become more of a target to rapists when you are making it hard to discuss. People hate to even alone. Avoid drinking or using drugs because it is say the word “rape” aloud as some feel that it is harder for you to remain in control of yourself. If too harsh an accusation to be thrown around in you choose to drink or use drugs, be sure to have high school. However, it happens enough that one or more trusted friends looking out for you. people need to be educated on the topic of rape. If you are confronted by a rapist in a dangerous Bringing rape into the weekend scene raises many situation, try to remain calm and assertive. Do questions: What qualifies as consent? When does not be afraid to physically fight back or try to rape happen? Can rape happen in a relationship? run away. Telling a rapist that you have an STD How often does rape occur? How can I try to pre- can also make him or her less interested in you. vent rape from happening? What do I do if some- one I know has been raped? What if I am raped? Consent Chill. It is going to be okay. We are here to help. Consent is not the absence of How it Happens & How a “no,” but the presence of a “yes.” Verbal consent must be given for sexual activity to Avoid it to not be considered rape. You cannot imply or assume that there is consent even if your partner Although it is most common that men rape is willing. A prior relationship does not imply con- women, any person can rape or be raped. As sent of any future sexual activity. You cannot re-

19 ceive legal consent from any person under the in- fluence of alcohol or drugs. It is your responsibility Prevelance in High to know the condition of your partner. Any person who is asleep or unconscious cannot give consent. School vs. College regarding rape are written in favor of wom- Even though rape may not seem like a en. Women are more likely to be seen as the regular occurrence in the weekend scene during victim in a situation where consent was not giv- high school, it is becoming increasingly import- en. It is important for boys especially to ensure ant to educate people about it before they go to that they have consent from their partner before college. The freedom and the exposure to new having sex. As people makes rape much more likely to occur teenagers, we in college than in high school. Rape plagues "I want you to tend to have our colleges much more than our high schools. a difficult time One in five women are sexually - feel the pounding understanding ed by the end of their college career. Sad- BY GABI ABACI & BEN HADERLE mixed signals ly, there is a great chance that by the end of of my heart be- from the other your college career, you will have heard of a gender. Com- rape at your school. By preparing yourself in cause fear has munication high school, you can become adept at han- is key. Boys, dling the delicate situations college will present. grown in every never assume that a girl who open space in my is saying “no” How to Get Help is “playing hard The first and most important step inre- soul. " to get” or “just covering from rape is to realize that you are not doesn’t want to to blame for being raped. Whether or not you seem easy.” ”No” means “no.” choose to report the rape is your decision. You Although it is rarely ever enforced, there is a law are not legally required to report rape. If you re- that states a (anyone under 18) cannot port a rape, it does not mean you are choosing to give legal consent. Adults are held responsible press charges. If you decide you want to report for having sex with minors, and the sexual ac- a rape, it is best to do so immediately without tivity will be considered rape, even if the minor changing clothes, showering, or even brushing said “yes.” It is important to understand this be- your teeth. This is so evidence can be gathered. fore you and your partner choose to have sex. Calling the YWCA As teenagers, our brains are different from adult (408) 287-3000 gives you someone to talk to. brains, and we make decisions differently. We are They can also provide someone to accompany capable of making good decisions, but we often you to the hospital or police. Whether or not disregard our decision in the heat of the moment. you choose to report a rape is a personal deci- Understand the situation you are in completely be- sion you must make in your own best interest. fore you make any decisions about sex. Although It is important to seek professional help it can be difficult, do not let others persuade you if you have been raped. It can help lessen to change your decision once it has been made. or eliminate the feelings of guilt, fear, , In making the decision of whether or not to have and anger. Although support from a few trust- sex, keep in mind that you do not in any way ed friends or family members can be very need to make a decision to please other people. beneficial for recovery, a professional pro- vides the necessary help to safely recover. You cannot receive legal consent from any person How to Help Someone under the influence of If someone you know tells you that he or she has been raped, the most important thing to alcohol or drugs. 20 I have written it over and over again, in different voices; I have changed the back- ground, the circumstances, the names, the color of my hair, the month/day/ year/hour. I’ve striven to be as graphic, or poetic, or straightforward, or dispas- sionate, or heartbroken about it as I can be, and underneath all of that, the sto- ry remains just what it is, what it was: “untellable.” Some lady on the internet de- scribed my silence better than I ever could. Rape is simply “untellable.” I find it ironic that all of my years of useless vocabulary memorization can’t help me now. Yet I want to explain all of it to you, so that you will hate him or at least hate the crime of rape just as much as I do, so that you will understand that a part of me continues to be raped today, even though the actual event happened several years ago. I want you to know that rape kills; all that I was, all that I knew about me and the world in which I lived was annihilated in just one night, by just one person. I want to explain how the night I was raped, the act of penetration was an act of violence and how I can’t imag- ine that that violence comes in another form that is considered beautiful and sacred. I want you to feel the pounding of my heart because fear has grown in every open space in my soul. I had to lay there that night and experience the most gruesome sense of powerlessness that I could ever imagine. I walk down the street knowing that every man has that power. I have yet to discover how I can face that fact and not be haunted. But, as I look around my life today, I know that the fear has dulled. I promised myself that if I were to write this, I would not lie about the devastating effects both enduring rape and surviving the aftermath. But for all the rape victims who read this, I will also write that life has continued. There were therapy sessions, angry hate mail never sent, journaling exercises, a pair of really worn in tennis shoes for when all I could do was run away, anger followed at last by tears and lots of bath and body products for all the time I spent in the shower. Almost despite myself though, it has eased the pain and memo- ries. What remains now is only the little things; the gold chain he wore around his neck, the cold floor that pressed against my back, the color of the walls and the ceiling. Most of all, though I will never forget that moment when I looked up at the ceiling. I knew that if I couldn’t find a place to escape to, inside my mind, where my body wasn’t being raped, I would not survive. But, as I soon learned, all that really survived was the op- portunity for me to begin again. Me, all sixteen years of me, had to be left in that room. I had to decide a long time ago that the quality of my life now was going to remain my re- sponsibility. He had one night to hurt me. He could not, and did not, take the rest of my life. - Reality Check December 1999

21 2 do is believe his or her story. Do not touch them as Acquaintance rape is a very real prob- they may feel vulnerable. Rape is a loss of power lem that cannot be overlooked. It is important and you need to try and make to keep yourself safe, wher- them feel as if they are in con- ever you may find yourself on trol. Try to get them to go to a "The most important the weekends. Remember hospital and report the rape to that rape can happen to any- the police. If the rape is recent, thing to do is believe one, so you must always be try to prevent them from brush- aware of your surroundings. If ing their teeth or showering in his or her story." you or someone you know has case evidence can be collect- been raped, the most import- ed. If the rape occurs in the Sili- ant step to recovery is getting con Valley, you can call the YWCA Rape Crisis Cen- help. Remember that you are a survivor, and ter at 287-3000 for assistance and intervention. you can overcome this painful time in your life. Statistics From the LGHS Shifting Perceptions surveys

2% of LGHS students drink daily, 8% drink weekly, 20% drink monthly, 10% drink once every couple months, and 60% rarely or never drink. 3% of LGHS students smoke marijuana daily, 7% smoke weekly, 5% drink monthly, 7% smoke every couple months, and 78% rarely or never smoke.

68% of LGHS boys and 61%the influence.of LGHS girls have had sex under

6% of girls and 3% of boys at LGHS have experienced

acquaintance rape.

22 Conclusion BY GRACE SANTANGELI & MATT MCCURRIE

Conclusionhrough writing about all the diverse be thinking clearly, and that it is important to stay possibilities of the weekend scene and aware of future consequences that can result all the consequences of these choices, from rash decisions. After this, we discussed the T the PAWS staff has gained an immense idea that, only “yes” means “yes” in our article amount of perspective. There are numerous about acquaintance rape. While writing this issue, things that can happen over a single weekend, the staff learned how hard it is to label one thing and while it’s important to have fun, it’s more im- as right and another as wrong. The fact is, some portant to stay safe. We learned about alcohol aspects of the weekend scene have gray areas, usage, its role in ‘the weekend scene’, and when where there is no distinguishable right or wrong. it can become dangerous. For example, we listed The best way to understand these circumstances the symptoms related to alcohol poisoning, and is for us to simply stay safe. We hope that PAWS how to help someone with alcohol poisoning. provides an insightful place to go if events on the We also learned about marijuana usage over the weekend scene don’t go as hoped, or if you wish weekend. It was interesting to see that, contrary to give yourself the option of setting your own to popular belief, many LGHS students still ab- boundaries for an upcoming weekend. Most im- stain from smoking marijuana. Mainly, we realized portantly, we strengthened our belief in the fact that not all weekend habits have to involve drink- that you always have a choice. There may be the ing and smoking. We learned about casual sex, social pressure to drink, smoke, or have sex on and the kind of labels that can result from these the weekend. But at the end of the day, it is al- encounters. In the moment, we may not always ways your choice whether or not you partake.

23 BY GRACE SANTANGELI & MATT MCCURRIE Resources Resources Human Relations Media Internet Recovery Forums The Times Reality Check Shifting Perceptions Students 2 Students

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