With the Astonishing Candour of a Man Still in Raw Shock, Tenor Paul Byrom
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Page 10 Irish Daily Mail, Saturday, November 10, 2018 ‘I don’t know what went wrong’ AUL Byrom is in great shape. His ever understand that. That’s some- athletic physique is the result of by Eoin thing I have to come to terms with and CrossFit, a daily exercise regime move on. With the ‘I think the transition from New York that, he says, doubles as a coping back to Dublin and starting a life that mechanism. For although the Murphy we thought we would have here was Pcharismatic tenor — who has carved out more difficult than either of us astonishing a transatlantic career as one of the na- expected. It put a strain on the mar- Tranquillity cruise when Dominique was 22. riage, for sure. tion’s top classical singers — may look But after five years of marriage, Paul says their ‘I’m sitting now wondering what’s like he doesn’t have a care in the world, relationship is over. However he admits he still next for me. I’m almost 40 and the candour of the reality is very different. doesn’t understand how, or why, things fell apart. thought of starting again breaks my Up until this year Paul was one half of music’s ‘I will say for as long as I live, for however long heart.’ golden couple. He was married to his sweetheart that may be, I will never understand what hap- Paul speaks openly and frankly about a man still Dominique, daughter of musician Phil Coulter. The pened,’ he says. ‘In all honesty, I don’t know how his emotional situation. He’s still try- couple first met when Paul performed on Coulter’s I’m not married any more and I don’t think I will ing to process the massive personal upheaval he now has to deal with on a day-to-day basis. Moving on is not in raw shock, a process he takes lightly as he had to put on hold his dreams of starting a family. ‘Deep down I thought I had met tenor Paul the one. I was madly in love with her,’ he says of Dominique. ‘I was very proud to call her my wife. I thought we would have kids and live happily Byrom ever after. The thought of trying to find the courage to date again or the thought of even getting married opens his again is just odd. ‘I don’t think I will ever get married again, if I’m honest. But I can’t see myself living alone either. I don’t heart about want to be that guy who lives with his dog and talks to him on Insta- gram every day.’ Paul is currently living in a rented his recent apartment and is keeping as busy as possible. His friends have been ‘inval- marriage ‘The thought of starting again split... and breaks my heart’ the pain of uable’, bringing him to the pub for football matches. He is also getting losing not serious support from his CrossFit crew. He no longer wears his wedding band, although a small tan line is vis- ible on his ring finger. just his wife He’s not yet ready to face the world of dating — let alone download the Tinder app. but also his ‘The thought of Tinder is scary,’ he says. ‘I remember Dom and I used to watch First Dates a lot. I’m not shy and I love conversation and company father-in-law and meeting people. But I used to watch it and wonder how these peo- ple were saying the things they did on camera. But here I am now in the Phil Coulter same space. ‘It’s 11 years since I was dating and loyal to him and we got on very well. a lot has changed. I have changed. That hurts a lot. His loyalty is with I’m grey in the beard and not as cool Dominique and I don’t hold that as I used to be — if I ever was. against him. ‘It’s difficult and scary and painful ‘But I will say that there was no but I’m immersing myself in work. incident. No issues, nobody cheated I’ve been really lucky that it hap- on the other. I find myself thinking of pened when I was at home in Ireland. them every day, the family, and I The support I got from my family think of Dom every day still. I often and friends is immense and I am say- dream about her. ing yes to everything. If someone ‘It’s very real still when I wake up asked me if I wanted to watch a chess and realise she’s not there. I will fig- match I would agree because the ure it out and it will all play out in thought of going home alone every the end for the better. I love Domin- evening is the worst. ique very much, I still do and I don’t ‘Sitting at home alone is the hard- wish her any ill.’ est. I think that anyone who is going It would have been easy for Paul to through a marriage break-up would stay in bed and not face his demons. say the same. All of a sudden, being But that’s not the person he is. He alone is the hardest part.’ believes in talking and openly admits While the loss of his soulmate is to seeking professional help when he tough enough to deal with, Paul also felt overwhelmed at his personal lost the professional connection to situation. his father-in-law Phil. He concedes ‘I have to look after myself. I do — I that losing his mentor hurts a great talk a lot,’ he says. ‘I am not one of deal. those men who won’t talk which is a ‘Losing the relationship with Phil huge thing for me. My own father was one of the hardest things to committed suicide and that has process as well,’ he says of the music stayed with me. He had his demons legend who was his father-in-law. to deal with and I saw first-hand ‘I’ve lost a family. We would have what keeping stuff to yourself can been 20 years working together and do. I struggled with levels of it myself he was very good to me. I was very Irish Daily Mail, Saturday, November 10, 2018 Page 11 ‘I don’t know what went wrong’ Bliss: beeps and it is one his fellow cast members in the Helix Panto. Paul Paul Byrom has signed up for a three-month with stint which will see him working all Dominique the way through Christmas. on their He plays the Sheriff of Notting- wedding ham in Robin Hood, making it his second year taking on the annual day panto. Last year, he was a star turn on The Helix stage in Beauty and the Beast where he played Gaston, much to the amusement of the young audiences who flocked through the doors. And this year will be no different. Working, he says, helps him fill his Panto star: With his former hours and he loves treading the father-in-law Phil boards as a panto heel. He has already signed up for tour dates in in recent years, when you come the US throughout February and back and the work isn’t here, it March, and he might even extend starts playing on you. A man needs his time on tour in the States to to work, whether that is PC or not, give his heart more time to heal. I don’t care. A man feels better ‘Professionally, America suits me when he’s working and I wasn’t. better,’ Paul admits. ‘There is prob- ‘That really got under my skin ably more work for me over there and got me down, to the point that and more interest in me. Ireland is I went and got help because of the a small scene. If you’re not getting fear of that developing into some- the profile, you’re not getting the thing that took me down a path I work. In the States, if you get the didn’t want to go down. I’m a big work you’ll get the profile, which is advocate of talking and getting bizarre.’ help and not being ashamed of Paul is visibly angry when he that. speaks about the Ireland that he ‘Even with the break-up, I’ve returned to. chatted to people about it — I ‘Watching Peter Casey talk in the think it’s the best way to be. You have to look after yourself and I am no good to anyone six feet under. There is something exciting about ‘Losing the that as well. It is about being posi- tive. By being positive, good things will happen and if I try to be a good relationship with person it will all play out in the end.’ Phil was hard’ In 2007 Paul became one of the original soloists in the hit show Celtic Thunder. He toured North presidential debate about how he America and Australia with the is going to encourage people to group and had six Number 1 World come back to Ireland or Leo tweet- Billboard albums. ing about what a great time it is to Last year his latest album Think- move back to Ireland, it makes me ing of Home reached the top of the sick in some respects.