In Support of SB6/SB 1060: Jennifers Law If You Are Not Strangulated Or
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In support of SB6/SB 1060: Jennifers Law If you are not strangulated or almost murdered, domestic violence has no weight. Waiting until the absolute worst possible result is what is leading the continuous homicide and extreme abuse cases for both women and children. The courts are really saying to abusers that the tolerance for domestic violence is very high - why 4 to 5 women a day die from intimate partner violence. 1800 women died in 2018. 773 children have died within the family court system. ACE study shows that 50% of children are being abused or witnessing domestic violence in the US. Judges are completely falling for manipulative, deceitful, coercive men in the courtroom. These men are extremely convincing. They know the laws and know how to stay under the radar. These men do not want to be accountable for their actions. And judges are minimizing and in denial about the prevalence and incidence of child abuse and child sexual abuse which is creating the perfect storm. Suicide is now the number 2 killer of teenage children. Monthly school shootings are a commonplace in our country. Our children are crying out for help. Over a trillion dollars is spent on domestic violence and as we know domestic violence is a genderized crime. Enabling male violence has also led to unimaginable violent events in our country, we now have monthly bombings, mass shootings, child pornography, child sexual trafficking. Many of these men are domestic violence perpetrators. Judges also fail to the notice the patterns of legal abuse from the most violent men. Abuse never ends but changes its form. They use the legal system to get back at their victims. These men will most likely file a full custody motion not to spend more time with children but to lower their child support or to get back at his victim. They also want access to the victim through the children to continue their abuse. They will also drag out litigation to bleed women of money. They will also file many motions and petitions to also drain mothers of money. All these tactics are missed by the court system. Because of judges' patriarchal lens, they just see a father who wants more time with the children and a mother who is preventing this from happening. Why most judges switch custody from the safe parent to the abusive parent. Judges also have their own reasons on why they minimize, deny and avoid the issues of domestic abuse, child abuse and child sexual abuse. As the research shows from batterer’s program, abusive behavior is extremely difficult to change if not impossible even when a participant is enrolled in programs etc. Abusive behavior is a mindset. Violent men use the legal system to inflict more suffering and pain onto their victims especially if they are moneyed, middle class status. Men who abuse children and women are extremely violent persons and this is not being recognized by the courts. Again joint custody/co-parenting arrangements creates unbelievable burden to police, hospital workers, teachers, social workers, psychologist, therapists, and lawyers for years. Domestic violence needs to be addressed on a systemic, holistic level so that patterns can be seen and so true reform can take place. Domestic violence is not a single strangulation incident, it is a contextualized form of abuse. It is a process where coercive control is the foundational layer. The reason why rape, domestic violence, child abuse is so underreported is due to the systems which promote silence and encourage abusers. The court system is a pivotal and essential piece in ensuring women know their place, are silenced, and remain in fear. This all needs to change. .