December 2018

$2$2

Memories of Christmases past

December_2018.indd 1 11/7/2018 7:42:49 PM Vol. 186 • December 2018 • No. 12

Connecting with the Virginia Advocate The official magazine of the Virginia Conference of The United Methodist Church

PILLOW TALK P.O. Box 5606, Glen Allen, VA 23058 Phone: 1-800-768-6040 or 804-521-1100 Something about Christmas just warms the Fax: 804-521-1174 E-mail: [email protected] soul. It is the balm to even the most wicked of Scrooges. Website: www.vaumc.org Detailed guidelines for the following Whether it’s the food or buying the perfect present for available upon request. someone, there’s a lot of love to go around. We all seem Subscriptions Print subscriptions are $20/one year and more willing and open to welcome the stranger as we $30/two years. Special bulk rate for five or more copies going to a single address remember the one who was born in a lowly manger. is $13 each for one year. For both printed copy and online access, subscriptions are $25/year and $35/two years. For online Madeline Pillow I personally have so many fond Christmas memories, only, cost is $10/year and $15/two years. Editor Subscribe online at www.vaumc.org, from dinners with both sets of my grandparents to movie under “Resources>Publications.” marathons. (Sorry that Patrick and I made you sit through Deadlines The Advocate is published once a month. The the extended The Fellowship of the Ring movie, Dad!) deadline to submit news and ad copy for the January 2019 issue is November 23. For more The memories that cling the hardest though are the information on future deadlines, contact the quiet moments. Advocate office or visit the website. Advertising/Tributes v Sitting under the Christmas tree on the first night it Rates for advertising and tributes are avail-able upon request. is lit and watching our cats gaze in wonder at the Local Church News lights above. Items should be typed (preferably sent via Warm, e-mail) or printed legibly, no more than 100 words, and of conference-wide interest. quiet v The quiet of a snowfall, the chilly cold on your face. Complete names of individuals, churches and districts should be included. Because of v space limitations, the Local Church section moments Sharing memories and laughter with my family. prohibits news items related to church members’ birthdays (of less than 100 v Singing carols acapella out of our old book of carols. years), wedding anniversaries, receptions for moving and/or retiring pastors, pho- tos of traditional Chrismon trees or Easter Throughout this issue, you will read about some warm trees/crosses, and any item over two months old. Color photos are encour- Christmas memories from our bishop to people around aged. Photos returned only if submitted with a stamped, self-addressed envelope. the conference. I hope you will remember your own Photos included on a space available basis. The editor reserves the right to edit special memories of this time of year and spread it all copy or refuse publication. around to those you meet! Letters Letters to the Editor are printed on a space- available basis. Letters should be limited to 150 words for space reasons. The Advocate will not print letters addressing a topic beyond two months of the publication of that issue. The Advocate editor reserves the right to edit all letters.

©2018 Virginia Advocate USPS 660-740 ISSN 0891-5598 Published monthly by Virginia United Method- ist Communications, an agency of the Virginia Annual Conference of The United Methodist Church. Periodical postage paid at Glen Allen, Va., and at additional mailing offices. The Vir- ginia United Methodist Advocate is owned by Virginia United Methodist Communications.

POSTMASTER: Send changes of address to Virginia United Methodist Advocate, P.O. Box 5606, Glen Allen, VA 23058. Editorial and business offices are located at 10330 Staples Mill Rd., Glen Allen, Va. Office hours are 8:30 a.m.-4:30 p.m., Monday through Friday.

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December_2018.indd 2 11/7/2018 7:42:51 PM TABLE OF CONTENTS

SECTIONS FEATURE

4-6 Commentary 16-29 Stories of Christmas past

7-8 World News

9-11 Equipping for Ministry STORIES

12-13 Technology Tips 4 Being a good Christian, citizen at UM Day

14 Local Church News 7 Court: One Church Plan largely constitutional

15 Events 9 Animated Wesleys make Methodist history fun Embrace technology to make meaningful family 30-31 Living the Word 12 connections 32 Clergy & Diaconal

34 From the Bishop

35 One Last Word

The Virginia Advocate Staff

Madeline Pillow | Editor, Director of Communications Forrest White | News Associate Cathryn Huff | Graphic Designer Pam Culler | Administrative Secretary Virginia Board of Communications: Jill Gaynor, president. The Virginia United Methodist Advocate uses the services of United Methodist Communications and United Methodist News Service. The report- Scan this code to go to the ing of news regarding any person or event, or the placement of any advertisement within these pages, conference website: does not constitute endorsement by the Virginia Advocate or any entity of The United Methodist Church. Opinions of writers are solely those of the authors and not necessarily those of this publication. www.vaumc.org

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December_2018.indd 3 11/7/2018 7:42:51 PM COMMENTARY UM Day: Being a good citizen and Christian By Barbara Lewis

voted, now what? I Have you ever wondered how you can be a good citizen and a good Christian? Have you ever wondered how you can have a signifi- cant part in government Senator Glen H. Sturtevant Jr. with attendees on UM Day. without running for office? include some hands-on your conversations and Attending UM Day at activities. which topics you might the General Assembly This year, the UM wish to address. is a great first step in Day organizers will be As Christians, we finding out what is next facilitating visits be- have a responsibility to and how to make a dif- tween our participants share our faith and our ference in our state and and their state senators beliefs. Our government country’s government. and state delegates by should reflect our basic As part of the day, you scheduling appoint- values and should uplift are partnered with ments ahead of time for our citizens. As citizens, guides who are already the morning of January we should be making involved in tracking 31. We will divide into sure that our laws are legislation before the groups led by guides fair and help those who legislature and who can based on legislative cannot help themselves. help you understand districts. We will be As United Method- how our state govern- following what legisla- ists we hope our state ment works. You will tion is introduced for reflects our beliefs and also be provided with a consideration this year, our Social Principles. variety of tools to help and providing you with When we meet with talk with your legisla- information on some of our legislators, they tors and to influence the key issues. You will notice and they listen. what becomes law. have an opportunity to They like to engage in The morning time discuss with, ask ques- conversations that help will include training in tions of your represen- them better understand advocacy, a highlight of tatives and to hear their the issues present in issues of interest that viewpoint. Your guide the proposed legisla- are part of the legisla- will be helping to lead tion and why the people tive docket, time at the that conversation, but of their districts are Capitol to meet with will also encourage concerned about those legislators, time for participants to speak issues. Meeting with our Letters to the Editor are printed on a tours, and a discussion as well. You will have legislators, calling their space-available basis. Letters may be emailed to [email protected] and answer time. The time as a group before offices and sending by the first of the month. afternoon session will the meeting to plan out them letters are some

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December_2018.indd 4 11/7/2018 7:42:53 PM COMMENTARY of the ways in which we Are we reluctant baptism. can help them do their to use the term This video energized jobs. Knowing how to our church council, and find out about what the “disciple?” we had a workshop current issues are, the to develop a plan of pros and cons of the he mission of The action, and some of us issues and where the TUnited Method- embarked on a period bills are in the process ist Church is to make of self-study and reflec- will be part of the focus disciples of Jesus Christ tion. One of us, Tom of our morning time on for the transformation Hassler, looked in the January 31. We will also of the world, yet at no Book of Discipline to see be providing you with time in the baptism and what it said about being tools to use beyond that membership ceremonies a disciple, but to his day to continue working in our hymnal do we amazement, the word to help the people who declare someone to be “disciple” was not in are most vulnerable and a disciple or ask them to the index; so he had to our state to be the best claim to be. search for paragraphs it can be. Why is this? Why that included that word. Register now for the are we reluctant to Later, he submitted a low cost of $30 before use this term? Why are petition to the 2012 December 28 by going we comfortable with General Conference ask- to www.vaumc.org, “member,” “follower,” ing that “disciple” be choosing the confer- and “apprentice,” but added to the next Book ence calendar page for not “disciple?” of Discipline index and January 31 or by going These questions recommended support- to eiseverywhere.com/ were raised because ing paragraphs. The umday2019. our pastor, the Rev. petition failed or was – The Rev. Barbara Lewis is David Ford, showed our not considered. Four pastor at Greenwood-Laurel Park church council a video years later, the Rev. in the Richmond District. of a talk he had heard Carol Bookwalter, Ron

at a meeting of pastors Hardman and Hassler in Nashville in 2009. submitted the same The speaker, the Rev. petition to the 2016 Paul Borden, an Ameri- General Conference, can Baptist living in the and again it failed or Pacific Northwest, re- was not considered. ported that his denomi- Beginning in 2010, nation had turned from Hassler asked mem- a graying, dying church bers of other Christian into a vibrant, growing denominations about church, even planting disciple-making. Here churches outside its are three responses: jurisdiction. This change 1. After attending a fu- came about because neral at an Episcopal all church energy was church, he asked the focused on making dis- senior priest about ciples, and a person was declared a “disciple” at (Con’t. on next page: “DISCIPLE.”)

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December_2018.indd 5 11/7/2018 7:42:53 PM COMMENTARY (“DISCIPLE” cont. from page 5.) becomes a disciple Jesus in your church? disciple-making, and of Jesus at baptism, Try this: ask your friends the answer without and in fact, a grand- in Sunday school, small hesitation was that son had just been group or church com- a person became baptized and was mittee these questions: a disciple of Jesus declared a disciple. 1. Are you a disciple at baptism. Tom 3. Asking the pastor of Jesus? asked: “What about at Duck, NC UMC 2. If yes, when did babies?” He said, what he thought our this happen? “Them too. When I denomination should walk the baby down do in this regard, 3. If no, do you want the aisle, everyone resulted in the pastor to be a disciple of is happy and smiles, saying that it would Jesus? and that begins the be better if confir- Their answers will baby’s ministry.” mands and newly enlighten you. 2. Tom asked “the most baptized adults – The Rev. Carol Bookwalter, declared themselves York River District; Ron Hardman, Catholic person he Williamsburg UMC, York River Dis- knew” — he teaches to be disciples rather trict; Tom Hassler, New Town UMC, Latin to young priests than being told they York River District — the same ques- were. tion. His answer We have come to be- was that a Catholic lieve that every person who publicly acknowl- edges being a disciple of Jesus will become a better witness for Christ as led by the Holy Spirit. With that in mind, we petitioned the 2016 General Conference CERTIFICATE RATES! to add some words in 6 mos. 2.30% 36 mos. 3.30% our hymnal that would make it clear that 12 mos. 3.00% 48 mos. 3.40% becoming a disciple of 24 mos 3.20% 60 mos 4.00% Jesus was a part of bap- tism. This petition was Savings Certificate available at 1.70% referred to the Board of Discipleship. We have Learn more at vaumdevco.org ! not been contacted. And so, our denomina- tion continues to want to make disciples of Jesus, yet we have no idea if and when this Contact us today! happens. 804-521-1150 | vaumdevco.org Do you know if there * Minimum investment of $1000 are any disciples of

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December_2018.indd 6 11/7/2018 7:42:54 PM The United Methodist connection in THE WORLD Court: One Church Plan largely constitutional By Linda Bloom Commission on a Way Church, Traditional and Originally published on Forward, as well as any Connectional Confer- Oct. 26, 2018 other petitions consid- ence plans. ered “in harmony” with “The task of the review of pos- the call for a special Judicial Council is to pass sible plans for the General Conference. upon the constitutional- Afuture direction The commission is an ity of the legislative peti- of The United Method- advisory body that was tions without expressing ist Church found the appointed by the Coun- an opinion as to their One Church Plan to be cil of Bishops following merits or expediency,” largely constitutional, General Conference the decision said. “It is said a decision released 2016 in hopes of finding up to the General Con- Oct. 26 by the denomi- a way to overcome fun- ference to determine the nation’s top court. damental disagreements wisdom of each plan.” In Decision 1366, within the church about But the top court’s which was unanimous, homosexuality. 87-page decision did the United Methodist The Council of Bish- point to issues with a (Below) Bishop Cynthia Fierro Har- Judicial Council found ops had asked Judicial number of the 17 peti- vey addresses the United Methodist more problems in the Council for a declaratory tions in the Traditional Judicial Council meeting in Zurich. Traditional Plan petitions decision on the constitu- Plan and a few of the The council ruled Oct. 26 that the that would need to be tionality of the plans in One Church Plan is largely consti- petitions in the One tutional, but found problems with addressed before that the Way Forward Com- Church Plan. the Traditional Plan. Photo by Diane plan could pass a consti- mission report — One (Con’t. on next page: “COURT.”) Degnan, UMCom. tutional test. Since another legis- lative proposal — the Connectional Confer- ence Plan — contains proposed constitutional changes required for im- plementation, the court ruled it has no authority to scrutinize the plan at this time. Next February, a spe- cial session of General Conference, the denomi- nation’s top legislative body, will meet in St. Louis to consider these three legislative propos- als from a report by the

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The United Methodist connection in VIRGINIA (“COURT” con’t from previous page) actions of all concerned for enforcing doctrinal to “adopt a uniform, persons and entities.” purity among its mem- standardized or non- The ruling on the In addition, while bers,” the court noted in uniform differentiated Traditional Plan focused General Conference can its summary. theological statement,” on due process and the require that the Book of Petitions 6, 7, 8 and the decision said. principle of legality. That Discipline be upheld in 9 of the Traditional Plan The constitution also principle “means that all its entirety and impose require certification for assigns to General Con- individuals and entities sanctions for non-com- standards related only to ference “the legislative are equally bound by pliance, it cannot selec- self-avowed practicing function to set standards Church law,” the deci- tively choose certain homosexuals and such related to certification, sion said, and the law standards “for enhanced selective and partial ap- commissioning, ordi- was to be applied fairly application and certifica- plication of church law nation and marriage,” at all levels of the con- tion.” violates the principle of along with the admin- nection. “Marriage and sexual- legality, making those istrative responsibility The Traditional Plan ity are but two among petitions unconstitution- to apply them to an- would impose manda- numerous standards al, Judicial Council said. nual conferences, local tory penalties on those candidates must meet Some parts of Peti- churches and pastors. who do not adhere to to be commissioned or tion 10, which estab- “The legislative church law that prohib- ordained,” the decision lishes a comprehensive branch of the Church is its self-avowed practic- said. It noted that other system “to ensure constitutionally free to ing homosexuals from criteria that should be compliance,” also were set the standards for en- serving as clergy and part of a thorough ex- found unconstitutional, trance into the ministry clergy from officiating at amination include “be- along with the second wherever and whenever same-sex weddings. The ing committed to social sentence on the issue of it sees fit,” the court said One Church Plan would justice, racial and gender just resolution in Peti- in its ruling. The court remove that language equity (and) personal tion 14. added that “the annual from the Book of Dis- and financial integrity.” In its ruling on the conference may enact cipline, the denomina- Of the 17 petitions One Church Plan, Judicial additional requirements tion’s lawbook. contained in the Tra- Council pointed out that that are not in conflict “Clergy persons ditional Plan, Judicial the principle of connec- with the letter or intent whose credentials and Council found that tionalism in The United of the minimum stan- conference member- Petitions 2, 3 and 4 Methodist Church “per- dards set by the General ship are at stake have were unconstitutional mits contextualization Conference.” the right to know what because they deny a and differentiation on Judicial Council found to expect when they bishop’s right to fair and account of geographic, the 17 petitions in the choose a course of ac- due process since other social and cultural One Church Plan to be tion or take a particular bishops would be among variations and makes constitutional, except stance on ordination, those making a final room for diversity of for one individual sen- marriage and human decision. Those petitions beliefs and theological tence each in Petitions sexuality,” the decision deal with setting up a perspectives but does 4, 8 and 13. said. panel and a process that not require uniformity of – Linda Bloom is the assistant “To pass constitution- could place a bishop on moral-ethical standards news editor for United Methodist News Service (UMNS) and is based al muster, any proposed involuntary leave or re- regarding ordination, in New York. legislation affecting quire a bishop to retire. marriage and human clergy rights must define “The Council of Bish- sexuality.” with sufficient clarity ops was not designed to General Confer- and specificity the stan- function as an inquisi- ence’s legislative power dards to guide future tional court responsible includes the authority

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EQUIPPING FOR MINISTRY Animated Wesleys make Methodist history fun

By Natalie Bannon

ow do you take the founders of HUnited Method- ism, the original Bible Moths, out of moth- balls and make learn- ing about them fun, engaging and relevant for both young and old, digital natives and digital newbies? One need only look at the popularity of primetime cartoons and animated blockbuster movies for an answer: make them animated! Animation has been used for everything from explaining scientif- ic principles to market- the founding fathers of and packaged in a way ing products and has a Methodism collected by that’s appealing to the unique ability to engage the General Commission eyes and ears of young audiences of all ages, on Archives and His- people, as well as pro- convey complex ideas tory, her wheels started viding a fresh way to simply and address sen- turning: Why not use engage all of our audi- sitive issues. animation to make ences, no matter their Fran Coode Walsh, United Methodist his- age,” she says. director of member tory relevant to a young Walsh said she knew communications at and digitally-savvy audi- that meant creating United Methodist Com- ence? something that was munications, said she Walsh, an experi- both mobile- and social loves to visit the United enced TV and video media-friendly. The re- Methodist archives at producer, said she sult is a short animated Drew University, a place knows it’s important to video series featuring she frequents to find be continually innova- the likenesses of the more of the stories pre- tive in telling the stories Wesley Bros, a weekly served there. So when of The United Methodist web comic by the Rev. she discovered comic Church. “We needed books featuring some of to make it relevant (Con’t. on next page: “CARTOON.”)

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December_2018.indd 9 11/7/2018 7:42:55 PM EQUIPPING FOR MINISTRY (“CARTOON” con’t from previous page) so committed to their while incorporating his- faith they put it all on tory, facts, trivia and, of Charlie Baber. The series the line,” said Walsh. course, a little humor. explores the history of Walsh wrote a script “It’s capturing the the church with John and, with Baber’s per- spirit of the comic in and Charles Wesley as mission, worked with that it’s modern lan- modern-day animated animator Jonathan Rich- guage and modern stuff characters. ter to bring the Wesley they’re talking about,” “I have a history in Brothers characters to said Baber, who’s been youth ministry, so my life. The result? A series doing the comics for job has always been to of three 1-minute ani- five years. “Hopefully, take something com- mated episodes called in a way that reminds plex and explain it to a “The Wesleys Take the people that these are teenager in a way that people like us. And matters to their heart “Levity is very that means that we and their life,” said Rev. can make a difference Baber in a recent United effective when today.” Methodist podcast. “The nature of “I always loved com- challenging animation, especially ics and graphic novels depicting a re-imagining because they helped assumptions of church fathers, is

The team that created “The Wesleys visually describe things disarming and, at the Take the Web” gathered at United in a way that’s different about our same time, gives the Methodist Communications in June from describing them viewer permission to 2018. Front row (left to right): Fran histories and Coode Walsh, script writer and with words.” approach a subject mat- producer; Henry Haggard, voice of “I loved the look of the people ter through a different John Wesley; the Rev. Charlie Baber, Charlie’s young Wes- lens,” said animator creator of theWesleyBros.com leys, and wanted people Richter. characters. Back row (left to right): that occupy Josh Childs, voice of Charles Wesley; to think of them as Walsh and Richter Jonathan Richter, animator. young men who were them, and I collaborated on the se- ries for about six weeks. feel that the “Jonathan and I went back and forth about medium does what they might put on the wall or what hidden this particularly jokes they would do,” well.” said Walsh. “And then when he brought it back – Jonathan Richter, animator to me, it was so much bigger and better than I Web,” also available as could have imagined … one 3-minute video. like, I made a joke about The videos look at potluck recipes, and how John and Charles they made the Jell-O Wesley might have jiggle. They just thought used social media and of things to make it a smartphones to share more entertaining and the church’s message, richer experience for

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December_2018.indd 10 11/7/2018 7:42:56 PM EQUIPPING FOR MINISTRY

the viewer,” she said. “Everywhere you sit United Methodist His- A panel, “Get to Work,” from the It’s those humor- and talk about what tory,” a stop-motion WesleyBros,com cartoon by the Rev. Charlie Baber. ous details that grab it means to be United clay animation that has the viewers’ attention, Methodist, we’re hop- been extremely popular making the animation ing it’s accessible,” said through the years. an especially effective Walsh. This includes The global communi- teaching tool. confirmation classes, cation agency has also “Levity is very effec- new member classes used animation to take tive when challenging and Sunday school on more serious topics, assumptions about our groups. There are even working in partnership histories and the people some discussion ques- with Chocolate Moose that occupy them, and tions to start a conver- Media and iheed to I feel that the medium sation. “The Wesleys create videos on pre- does this particularly Take the Web” is avail- venting Ebola, and again well,” said Richter. “Fur- able for viewing and with Chocolate Moose ther, the shorter length download on YouTube to raise awareness of format creates a more and UMC.org/wesley the plight of displaced casual stage for their bros. refugees. ‘teachable moments.’” This isn’t United Learn more at www. Those teachable mo- Methodist Communica- umcom.org. ments are exactly what tions’ first foray into an – Natalie Bannon is a public United Methodist Com- animated history of the relations professional, freelance writer and former public relations munications hopes local denomination. In 1984, associate at United Methodist churches and groups they produced “Clay- Communications. will get from this series. ride: A Gallop Through

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December_2018.indd 11 11/7/2018 7:42:56 PM TECHNOLOGY TIPS Embrace technology to make meaningful family connections

By Tricia Brown know each other better, Bring back game and … organize practi- night ou’ve heard it calities/logistics during before. You may the week more easily.” Remember the days Yhave even said Bringing generations when families sat it. Technology is de- together like never around the dining room stroying our families. before, technology now table playing board But is it really? Accord- offers instant communi- games? Well, those ing to some research, cation regardless of dis- days aren’t gone. Today, networked families are tance. No longer are we families can use gaming reporting that technol- confined to landlines or systems, smartphones ogy is helping them “snail mail.” Families and tablets to have fun today use social media “connect and coordi- together. You will find apps like Twitter and nate their lives” and apps for traditional Facebook Messenger to bringing about “shared games like Scrabble as keep in touch. Teens can moments of exploration well as new word-based text to let parents know and entertainment.” games. when they have arrived. Since Internet and While many of these smartphone usage is College students can Gchat or instant mes- games can be played more popular than ever, individually, families here are a few ways to sage with their families. Children can Facetime can also pair off and use technology to bring compete against each families closer. or Skype with grand- parents who live across other. Keep in contact the country or across In addition, lots of the world. With services great mobile games for In 2015, the Ericsson such as WhatsApp and group play are avail- Consumer Lab studied Fring, gone are the days able. Party games like the impact of commu- of expensive long-dis- Heads Up! (Android, nication technology on tance fees. Don’t worry iOS), Reverse Charades familiesand said, “The if the older generation (Android, iOS) and Party ability to have continu- of your family doesn’t Doodles offer tons of ous contact throughout seem keen on learn- family fun. Don’t worry the day with other fam- ing these “new tricks.” if you aren’t technologi- ily members increases With a little prompting cally skilled. Many of the feeling of closeness and patience, you can these games are simple and happiness.” Fami- easily bridge the digi- to play. For example, lies who participated in tal divide and connect Heads Up! is a pop- the study claimed that seniors to technology as culture charades game technology helps them well. Staying in touch played with one mobile “communicate more, has never been easier! device among a group.

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December_2018.indd 12 11/7/2018 7:42:58 PM TECHNOLOGY TIPS v Once the app is Host a family ways that family mem- files with one another. loaded, whoever movie night bers can participate With so many options, is “it” places the in each other’s lives you may want to do a device against his Families no longer — even when they are little research on how or her forehead. have to wait a week to miles apart. Grandpa to buy a digital photo can record a video frame in order to deter- v The device will see their special tele- of himself reading a mine which one is best display a word that vision show or plan a bedtime story to his for your family. “it” cannot see. special trip to the movie rental store to pick up granddaughter who v Everyone else tries that new flick. If ev- lives hundreds of miles Grow spiritually shouting clues to eryone suddenly finds away. Mom can watch Perhaps one of the make “it” guess the a free night at home, her son taking his first most inventive ways word. schedule an impromptu steps, even though she to use technology is to v family movie night. is deployed overseas. Once “it” guesses help your family grow Netflix, Amazon, Itunes In most instances, it’s a the word, she closer in your spiritual and Hulu offer a variety matter of simply tak- can nod her head walks. Beyond simply of services for family ing the picture or video downward to ad- texting your child a entertainment without with your mobile device vance to the next daily Bible verse, you leaving your front door. and uploading it to the word. may discover many In addition, Pureflix. service you use. Instruc- v spiritual tools available If “it” cannot guess com offers faith-based tions on how to upload online to access via mo- a word, he or she entertainment alterna- a video to YouTube or bile phones and tablets. tilts his or her head tives. So, throw a bag of uploading to Vimeo are The United Method- backward to skip popcorn in the micro- easy to find online. ist Church has many the word. wave, gather the fam- If you’re more tra- discipleship resources v “It” continues until ily around the TV and ditional and still prefer that parents can use to his or her time has enjoy a movie night. framed pictures, you enhance their children’s elapsed. Then an- may want to consider faith. Many Sunday other player takes Collect (and share) giving a digital frame school curricula, such a turn as “it.” family memories to your loved ones. Traditionally, these as the UMC Deep Blue v The object of the Today, more than types of frames feature Kids Curriculum, now game is to see ever before, it’s easy a slideshow of photo- offer extra features for which player can to collect and share graphs that have been parents to use at home, guess the most memories. Facebook uploaded to the device including apps, mobile- words. and other forms of so- via a USB connection friendly videos and Don’t forget “tradi- cial media have opened or are displayed via a games that can be used tional” gaming systems. a new door for sharing memory card. However, to reinforce Sunday’s The Wii, X-box, Playsta- special and everyday newer digital frames lessons. In addition, tion and other gaming events with our friends support the use of many churches post devices have no age and family. Sites like Bluetooth, cellular and daily devotionals and limit. Whether your Flickr and Google other wireless technol- other resources. In fact, family is into dancing, Photos offer ways to ogy to share files. Some you can even use the sports, fitness or adven- organize and share pho- wifi-enabled frames can Internet to find free or ture, active gaming can tos without the expense even load images from low-cost books, articles provide a great way to and hassle of printing. the Internet via email and other information share a few laughs and YouTube, Vimeo and or photo-sharing sites. get a little exercise. Ustream offer more Some can even share (Con’t. on page 15: “TECHNOLOGY.”)

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December_2018.indd 13 11/7/2018 7:42:58 PM DISCIPLES HELPING TO TRANSFORM THE WORLD

Epworth and Halesford ▲ United Methodist churches in the Danville District sponsored an event featuring foods from nine countries at its first ever International Tasting on Aug. 11, 2018. Foods from countries, including Greece, Mexico, Poland, Jamaica, Thailand, Italy, Trinidad, India and the United States were available for sampling during the

event. ▲ Embrace 2018! was the first gathering of the Virginia clergy- women in 30 years. Over the course of two days at the end of September, over 200 clergywom- en worshipped, studied and were part of community. They also engaged in hands-on missions, participated in a Talent/No Talent Show and listened to panel dis- cussions on change and growth within their ministry contexts. Dr. Hi Rho Park was the keynote speaker from the General Board of Higher Education and Ministry.

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December_2018.indd 14 11/7/2018 7:42:59 PM EVENTS

(“TECHNOLOGY,” cont. from page 13.) Jan. 30 at 7:30 p.m. Learn more on spiritual topics to discuss with DECEMBER about the event on pgs. 4-5 of this your family. issue. Technology has benefits, Conference center closed for but technology also has risks. Christmas holiday Special Session of General Parents should take every pre- Dec. 21-26, Glen Allen Conference caution to keep kids safe from The conference center of the Virginia Feb. 23-26, 2019, St. Louis, MO the dangers online. Since nothing Conference will close at 1 p.m. on The Council of Bishops has called can take the place of face-to-face Friday, Dec. 21 in observance of the a Special Session of the General time with your family, you also Christmas holiday and will remain Conference of The United Meth- should consider how much time closed through Wednesday, Dec. 26. odist Church to be held February should be spent on social media. 23-26, 2019 in St. Louis, Missouri. But this fact remains. Technology JANUARY The purpose will be to receive and doesn’t have to draw us apart. If act on a report from the Commis- used wisely, it can, in fact, help sion on a Way Forward based on the Conference center closed for us create more meaningful con- recommendations of the Council nections. New Year’s Day observance of Bishops. The 32-member Com- – Tricia Brown has been a freelance writer Jan. 1, 2019, Glen Allen mission was authorized by General and editor for more than 20 years, ghost- The conference center of the Virginia Conference 2016 and appointed by writing and editing for individuals as well as for Conference will be closed on Tues- the Council of Bishops to examine health, education and religious organizations. day, Jan. 1, 2019 in observance of paragraphs in The Book of Discipline This article was written for concerning human sexuality and United Methodist Communications. New Year’s Day. exploring options to strengthen the unity of the church. You can learn Conference center closed for more at www.umc.org/topics/ MLK Day observance general-conference-2019-special- Jan. 21, 2019, Glen Allen session and get Virginia resources at www.vaumc.org/GC2019. The conference center of the Vir- ginia Conference will be closed on Monday, Jan. 21, 2019 in observance of Martin Luther King Jr. Day obser- vance.

United Methodist Day at General Assembly Jan. 31, 2019, Richmond Ever wanted to know how to create real change in our state govern- ment? Want to know more about real issues facing our legislature? United Methodist Day at the General Assembly is the place for you! This is your opportunity to help faith communities become empowered to serve as missionaries of justice, as The Advocate magazine publishing schedule requires well as the more traditional mis- that information be compiled sooner than the sionaries of mercy. A briefing for the month for which it is published. For events you are interested in, please contact those listed for the event will be held on Wednesday, events as points of contact for the most up-to-date information and for questions.

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December_2018.indd 15 11/7/2018 7:42:59 PM Memories of Christmases past

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December_2018.indd 16 11/7/2018 7:43:01 PM Memories of Christmases past his feature shares stories Tfrom around the conference of warm Christmas memories or spiritual insights of the Christmas season. If you didn’t submit a memory to this issue, take a moment to think of your Christmases past. What fuzzy feelings come to the surface in this moment of reflection? What recollections bring the tear to the eye? A very Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you and yours from the Advocate and conference Communications office.

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December_2018.indd 17 11/7/2018 7:43:03 PM When your wife is having one con- tinuous contrac- It’s a girl! tion, with her head By Forrest White rammed against the door in the t 4:38 on Christmas morning 1992, I threw open backseat, you may the door to our guest room, woke my mom and be able to share a said, “Somebody’s coming to town, and it ain’t comforting word Santa.” or two, but you’re Less than 10 minutes had passed since I was really thinking startled out of fitful sleep to find my wife, Desda, bent things like: over at the end of our bed. “This baby is going to be born Snooping for presents? Nope. on the Cooper River Bridge.” Hiding some of mine? Uh, no. “I don’t know nothing ‘bout birthin’ babies!!!” Moaning in pain? Yes! “Aiiiiiieeeeee!!!” This was it, the moment we had been waiting for An eternity of shrieks and more than a few ignored since she took the home pregnancy test so many red lights later, we arrived at the emergency room months ago, called me at work and said, “Maybe you around 5:10. should come home for lunch today.” Still with child, Desda had a look on her face even Morning hadn’t broken. worse than the one you get when you stump your toe Her water had. really hard on the sofa leg, then turn around too fast We knew what to do next … and stump it on the coffee table. Panic! In the birthing room 15 minutes later she was call- Within seconds, my entire body was shaking like a ing for an epidural, a giant numbing shot in the back. freezing construction worker pulling jackhammer duty Problem was, an IV has to be flowing for a while first. during an earthquake. The nurse barely had time to stick a vein. As recent Lamaze graduates, we knew we had to Her doctor kept saying, “This baby is going to be do more than panic. We had to start timing contrac- here by 6 o’clock.” tions. Back then at least, you didn’t call the doctor I thought she was joking. until the contractions are coming every five minutes After all, we were Lamaze graduates. We had for an hour. enough provisions packed to survive, say, three weeks After five minutes, Desda was starting her fourth on Gilligan’s Island. contraction. At 5:45, Desda got the command to start pushing. When told of this, her doctor on call skipped the I supported her head and pulled her left knee while a medical terminology and chose these words, which, nurse pulled her right. according to Desda, were uttered quite professionally, One good push and the baby’s head appeared. “Jump in the car and boogie.” Eyes wide, mouth open, I’m thinking, “It didn’t hap- At 4:52, with our Golden Retriever Jester striking a pen this fast in Lamaze class even when the tape was familiar pose – paws on the fence, punctured volley- fast forwarding.” ball in his mouth, tailing whipping up a breeze — we “Here comes another contraction,” the doctor said. left our home bound for the hospital. “Push, girl!” We lived in Charleston, SC, at the time, more She did and … Whoosh! specifically on James Island, meaning we had to cross “It’s a baby girl,” the doc said at 5:48, seconds both the Ashley and Cooper Rivers to get to the hospi- before wishing she could clone Desda. tal where her OB-GYN practice delivered babies. A … baby … girl. “It’s not much farther now, sweetie,” I said, oh, a Haley Alyxandra White stole our hearts the mo- few hundred yards out of the driveway. ment they placed her in her mommy’s arms.

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December_2018.indd 18 11/7/2018 7:43:04 PM Until that moment, my best Christmas surprise ever the foot of her bed. So, I must have a special spiri- came a month after my 16th birthday when the keys tual eye for glimpses of … to a used Toyota fell out of my stocking. Well, here is a poem I wrote when I returned Little Haley made her TV debut that Christmas home after a remarkable, grace-filled moment in night on the local news, sporting a red stocking cap. that vast dump site: Meanwhile, Desda was thrust into legend status among not only the hospital nurses but our family and Like children, friends as well. Snowdrops, daffodils and crocuses Two pushes. Nothing to block the pain. No drugs to Need protection from wear off. No stitches. January warmth that betrays The doctor even told her she could go home later A bitter cold to come. that day if we had special Christmas plans. Day after warm day, the sun seduces their She didn’t feel like a legend. Green tendrils to grow taller. “I feel like a Pez dispenser,” I over- A trip to the dump for mulch to blanket heard her saying. These naïve thrivers reaps a surprise. Though they Christmas trees that recently displayed the didn’t come on a Joyous lights celebrating the Nativity Christmas Day our Now are piled like matchsticks awaiting the grinder. son Austin and They have no memory of the joy they pretended daughter Kerrigan Nor the innocence they invoked. joined our Christ- A bright color imbedded in crushed branches lured mas baby Haley me to one tree. along the way, our Tucked amidst still-fragrant boughs — precious gifts, the Green paper cone scotch-taped for body, loves of our life Red rough-cut wings, together. White circle for a face — – Forrest White is news associate for the A handcrafted angel. conference Communica- tions office. And deeper I peered, the crayon words: ‘Angle Mary protekt us from guns’. A child’s prayer discarded with this tree. Maybe by mistake? Snagged in the branches as they went. Angel in the dump Now, an Angel in the Dump, By the Rev. Benjamin Pratt A plea for all the innocents Whom we discard from our memories, ny home gardener knows that an unseason- From our prayers able warm snap in January will wreak havoc So quickly. on perennials and spring bulbs. So, one winter I replaced the boughs around her. I put “mulch the beds” on my to-do list and drove Tucked her in. to the dump, the best source of fresh mulch in our area. It’s also, in mid January, a green and brown Echoed the prayer: monument to the Christmas just past. I am not Cath- Protekt us all from guns. olic, nor was my grandmother, although she always insisted that she once saw the Virgin Mary appear at – Printed in Short Stuff from a Tall Guy, by the Rev. Dr. Benjamin Pratt, retired pastor; 2015, Read The Spirit Books.

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December_2018.indd 19 11/7/2018 7:43:05 PM Magnified emotions By the Rev. Tom Lester

e had many memorable Christmases from the time Mom lost the instructions to cook the ham loaf to when she was sick with flu and couldn’t be Mom. I’ll always remember the Christ- mas dad forgot to open the flue on the chimney and burned the gift wrapping paper. I remember the bags of fresh fruit Santa Claus left us under the tree. There was the time we thought cat tracks in the snow on the edge of the raised brick flower bed in front of the picture window were reindeer tracks. And the Christmas when Dad was away on snow duty (required of Virginia Department of Highways employees) due to a heavy snow that blanketed Southwest Virginia (c. 1966). I remember the Christ- mas parades in Bristol VA/TN (I marched in several with my high school band) and visiting Santa Claus in the toy department at Sears Roebuck and Co. But the Christmas that probably had the strongest claim on my mind and heart was the first Christmas Simple things my sister was on call as a nurse at Bristol Memorial By Desiree Flora Hospital. We waited for her to get home to begin our Christmas Eve family time. When she arrived, hen I was growing up in the ’60s and ’70s she told us what happened just before she left to my family went to church on Christmas Eve come home. As she wished her shift and the oncom- for the early service that was for children. ing shift “Merry Christmas,” a “code” [heart attack] We hurried home for treats and a drink. This was a came into the cardiac unit with a nurse straddling special occasion. We would gather around a candle the patient and administering chest compressions while my dad read the Christmas story from the Bi- for cardio-pulmonary resuscitation (CPR). Unfor- ble. When I was about 11 or 12 we started exchang- tunately, the patient died and cast a pall over the ing names for Christmas Eve. There were seven chil- Christmas wishes in the unit. My sister carried that dren and our parents. We at first could only spend pall home to us. Suddenly we were aware that one dollar for a gift. We had to think hard about Christmas is special but not immune to the pain and what we could get for that. When we were teenag- sorrow of life. I think of that night every Christmas ers we raised the amount to $5. We were always so and pray for those whose Advent celebration of excited to see who had our name and what we got. hope and life is interrupted by pain and sorrow — We sang Christmas carols and laughed and were magnified by the highly emotional impact of the silly. Those days are gone now. We all have families season. of our own, even grandchildren. Not often are we – The Rev. Tom Lester is pastor of Washington Street UMC in Petersburg. all together for the holidays. I miss those days. We didn’t have much except love, joy and laughter. We were so happy.

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December_2018.indd 20 11/7/2018 7:43:06 PM last Christmas with us. Again, all through this time, church family and friends prayed, visited and sent Heartfelt holidays cards. At about three in the morning on December By the Rev. John Stelzl 24, our home phone rang. A heart donor match had been found. Before we made the hour-long ike most folks who grew up in the church, I drive to the hospital, I fed hay to our cattle. The have fond memories of Christmas that include tractor’s muffler was gone and it was quite loud, not only my family, but my church family alerting our neighbors that something was up. I as well. I recall the good-natured ribbing that our called the girl who was to be my wife and along Sunday school superintendent endured each year, with my mom we went to the hospital. We waited as he set up a cedar Christmas tree that was always for an eternity until the doctor emerged and the same shape and height and smelled wonder- said everything was fine. We returned home and ful. I remember the weeks of practices that would stopped at the store for a few items. Remember lead up to the annual Christmas program and how, this was 1990 and cell phones with their instant each year, musty bath robes and curtain ties would communication were yet to be. As we stood in be brought forth from somewhere deep within the the checkout line, friends and neighbors gathered church closet to be transformed into shepherds’ around and already knew our good news and re- robes and wise men’s belts. There were Christmas joiced with us. Much later, after he had recovered, projects like churchwide candy making and orna- dad said that he could feel folks praying for him! ment creation. (Helpful tip: homemade clay uses lots I suppose Christmas has always been a heart- of salt….don’t eat it.) warming time for those who embrace it. But for But three Christmases stand out from all the our family it was — and is — definitely so, espe- rest – Christmas 1984, 1990 and 2006. Actually cially when dad came home to a huge painted Christmas 1984 began for me just a few days before plywood sign, on the front lawn with a heart on Halloween. I came home from school and found my it which read, “Welcome Home, Louie,” and a dad on the family room floor in the middle of car- bushel basket filled with Christmas and get-well diac arrest. He spent the next several weeks in the cards! hospital, with recurring cardiac episodes and even- Dad battled heart disease for 19 years before tually quadruple bypass surgery. During that time, dying in August 2002. All those wonderful church family, friends and church folks brought food to our family and friends filled our church to overflowing home, cut firewood, took care of the farm animals with their presence and love! However, our season (on our working/commercial farm), visited, prayed of Christmas miracles was far from over. Several and sent cards. Dad was not able to come home for years passed and we were expecting the birth of Thanksgiving, but he did come home by mid-Decem- our second child. My wife was past the due date ber. He was too weak to help bake “German Bread” for the birth of our daughter. As a distraction from (a family tradition of sweet yeast bread with dried her extreme discomfort, we made a trip to Belle fruit), but we had him home for Christmas. By spring Grove (a local historical mansion) and listened of 1985 he was able to once again bring a special to live Christmas music. A gentleman played the anthem song for Sunday morning worship time. guitar and a lady played the recorder as we sang Through the years dad’s health would bounce Christmas carols together alongside complete around between good and not so good. As the strangers. It was one of those times when you 1990s rolled around, his health was in a steady could feel the peace of God in your heart and all decline, and he was in need of a heart transplant. around. The quiet magic of that evening has been Throughout the fall of 1990 he was in and out of the a fond memory that we talk about to this day. hospital. He spent most of December in a hospital After that wonderful evening of being surrounded bed. We brought a small cedar tree from the farm by music, carolers and beautiful live decorations, and decorated it for him, thinking it would be his the days passed swiftly (for me — I’m not so sure

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December_2018.indd 21 11/7/2018 7:43:07 PM about my wife), and our daughter was born on Dec. English racer bike. I found pictures of it in a catalog, 22. Momma and baby girl came home to a home all which I “accidently” left open to that page. And decorated for Christmas on Christmas Eve! when that didn’t seem to work, I even drew pictures If you were to ask me if I have Christmas memo- in art class at school of me riding on it in utter joy ries I’d have to answer, “I sure do!” The custom is and brought them home to show. Just to make sure to give the birthday person love and gifts, but I have the point got across, I wrote a caption on each one, to admit that the blessings God has given to me something real subtle like, “Bass, riding his new Eng- and my family on Jesus’ birthday, and all other days, lish Racer, which he got for Christmas.” But nothing make anything I could give back pale in comparison. was having the desired effect. Maybe part of it was Thank you Lord for blessings and wonderful memo- that my brother and sisters were doing pretty much ries…..Happy Birthday Jesus! the same thing. You know, having brothers and sisters – The Rev. John Stelzl is pastor of John Wesley and Bethel UMC is a real pain sometimes. But they had about as much in the Winchester District. luck with Mom and Dad as I had that Christmas. I understood the reason for our failure to com- municate with Mom and Dad. Kids notice stuff, you know. They are much more in the know than parents might think. And so I had heard and seen Mom and Dad whispering to one another. I knew that times The English were tough. Mom stayed at home to take care of five children, while Dad was a carpenter. Money was racer tight. We were fortunate in that we had a roof over our heads, and we never went hungry or unclothed, but there just wasn’t much left over for Christmas. Certainly there wasn’t an extra $70 dollars for getting me an English racer. Do you know how much money that was in 1967 for a poor carpenter with five kids? Though I did my best to understand and accept reality, it still hurt, especially when I thought about or saw Donald on his bike. His dad was rather well off and operated a store in town. And Donald was an only child! So, I had resigned myself to the brutal truth — I would not be getting an English racer that Christmas By the Rev. Bass Mitchell or most likely any other one. I would have to enjoy it vicariously through watching Donald on his English t was in 1967, when I was 12 years old. The racer or maybe begging him to let me ride it, which year before, at Christmas, my best friend Don- he promised to do but never had. But he did have ald got an English racer bike. It was the most someone take a picture of him on it and he gave a beautiful bike I had ever seen. It had everything — copy to me. What a thoughtful guy! you could change the gears, the brakes were on the Finally, it was Christmas morning. Usually we kids handle bars (how cool was that?!) and it had shiny got up early, having barely closed our eyes all night. black paint with white stripes like lightning bolts. Ev- Our rooms were upstairs. We met on the steps and ery day he rode it to school, flaunting it before us all walked sadly down them that year. In the past we as we stood turning green with envy — and no one had raced down, barely touching a step! This morning more so than me. each step creaked beneath us as we made our way to So, you guessed it. When the next Christmas came what would surely be the worst Christmas ever. along — for months before it in fact — I dropped I can still recall it like it was yesterday. I could hint after hint that all I wanted for Christmas was an hardly believe my eyes — for there, glimmering in the

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December_2018.indd 22 11/7/2018 7:43:07 PM Christmas tree lights, was a brand new English racer! gloomy knowing I couldn’t get it. And there, too, were the presents my siblings had But that’s not what I felt most. No. Most of all I wanted, but I barely took notice. In a flash, I had the felt loved. That English racer bike took on a whole bike out the door and was zooming down the side- new meaning for me. If I thought it was awesomely walk! Oh, you can’t imagine the feeling. I didn’t even beautiful before, that was nothing compared to how put on a coat! it looked now. I rode by Donald’s house several times and even I turned and saw my Dad walk into the room that saw him peering through the window at me once, Christmas morning, still in his pajamas, unshaven, which delighted me to no end. I’d have to get a yawning and stretching, thankful no doubt for one picture of me on the bike to give him! I zipped all day he didn’t have to work. I ran and threw my arms around town, the streets mostly empty on Christmas around him and hugged him with all my strength, un- morning. I waved at the neighborhood kids out in able to say anything, but finding, as he smiled down their yards playing with their toys. Some had bikes, at me, that no words were necessary. too, but none as nice as mine, something they were Every Christmas now, I think about my Dad, who well aware of judging from their jealous stares. has gone on to the with the Lord. I think about that Maybe I’d give them pictures too. Christmas and what he sacrificed, what he gave for Only later, when I returned, my cheeks stinging me. I have found that remembering this helps me as from the cold and hands numb, did I begin to think much as anything I do to prepare for the real mean- some thoughts like, “How? Who? But I just knew I ing of Christmas, that time when our Heavenly Father wouldn’t get it. The money just wasn’t there.Did a gave the very best for all of us. Amen. rich relative die and leave us money? But we didn’t – The Rev. Bass Mitchell is pastor at Manor Memorial in New Market. have any rich relatives that I knew of. Did Mom and Dad rob a bank? Maybe they sold one of the sibs — after all, we had enough to spare. I counted them and they were all there.” Now I really considered letting it go, you know, not asking any questions and just accepting my good fortune. But I couldn’t. I got Mom alone in the kitchen and with much prodding I found out how all of this had happened, though she was reluctant to tell me. She asked if I had noticed something about Dad. I thought about it and realized, that for some time leading up to Christmas, Dad hadn’t been at home as much as usual, but I had not thought much about it. My mind had been on the English racer “Where was he all that time?” I asked Mom that By the Rev. Jeane Dunkum Christmas morning. She told me that he worked at his regular job dur- y favorite Christmas memory was when I was ing the day for the last couple of months and then probably about 10 years old. I grew up in went to another one at night. In fact, he was work- northeast Kansas and went to a little Method- ing for Donald’s father, in his store and at his home. ist church in Lancaster. I walked to and from church Dad, you see, had traded his time and labor to get my and it was probably half a mile or so. One Christmas siblings and me the things we so wanted for Christ- Eve, we had just had the special service. As I was mas.Then I remembered noticing just how tired Dad walking home I remember standing under a street had been looking for the last few weeks. It…and it all lamp, seeing the stars in that Kansas sky, being sur- came together… rounded by snow and just knowing that God was I suddenly felt overwhelmed with emotions, guilt with me. It was a very holy, precious moment. mainly, for wanting that bike so much and acting so – The Rev. Jeane Dunkum is pastor of Lafayette UMC, Roanoke District.

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December_2018.indd 23 11/7/2018 7:43:09 PM you came by our house you saw a cascade of lights blinking merrily in rhythm with the music. Cool! However, many would say, “Tacky! Very Tacky!” People who know me shake their heads, laugh and say, “That’s Larry.” Others, also shake their heads and walk away wondering if this preacher needs professional help. I wondered if they were right until I read about someone who displays over 40,000 lights around his house starting in July. July? In addition he purchased wildly expensive equipment and literally choreo- graphs a show synchronizing the lights to holiday Scotch pine tree music. Their display attracts thousands of visitors By Doris Page from all over the area who tune their car radios to an FM station that plays the same music and drive hen we were kids, we’d go pick out the Christ- slowly by to watch the lights dance to the tunes. mas tree as a family. It had to be a Scotch Pine “Why do you do it?” the reporter asked. since that was what Mom wanted. I really appreciated his reply: ”I love standing So we searched the lot until we found the Scotch outside the house and talking to people. It’s turned Pines. Then, after testing the tree trunk to see if it was into a ministry. People open up and talk about ev- straight, Mom would stand beside the tree to test for erything.” the right height. The tree had to be just a little taller Speaking of lights, the Wise Men found the than she was, and, compensating for our tree stand, manger by following the light of an unusual star and the tree would be exactly the right height. It worked Jesus himself said to the disciples: “You are the light every time! of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be Of course, over the years, Mom’s height diminished hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under but the tree still turned out to be the right height us- a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where ing this formula! I am convinced it was some kind of it gives light to everyone in the house.” (Matthew special thing that only mothers can do! 5:14-15) Admittedly, I don’t think the Wise Men followed 40,000 Christmas lights and I doubt Jesus was think- ing about tacky Christmas lights when he said, “You are the light of the world.” But… sometimes we are called to let our light Sowing seeds of shine brightly so people can see who we are, what we believe and the amazing God of grace we serve. In the midst of sharing laughs about my tacky lights I often receive an opportunity to talk about my faith faith…“tackyBy the Rev. Larry Davies lights” in God. Funny but true.

or me, Christmas used to start with lights — lots of lights. What can I say? I grew up in Vir- ginia Beach, home of the “Tacky Light Tour.” At the beach we like to say: “Brighter lights on the outside mean brighter, happier families inside.” If true — our family has been deliriously happy! One year, I purchased a control box to coordinate the flashing lights with popular Christmas carols. If

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December_2018.indd 24 11/7/2018 7:43:10 PM Of course, there are many other ways to be a hear from your CO. light. We had services almost around the clock on ✶ Providing presents for a needy family at Christmas Day, the first a lessons and carols service Christmas. that I had organized. I sat there in a daze and went to bed and woke up in the same way. I went to my ✶ Seeking opportunities to be nicer to others office and called home. I was so dispirited that I at work. told my mother I didn’t even want to open the gifts ✶ Becoming more involved in your local church. that collected on my desk. Then a man appeared ✶ Hosting a Bible study at your house. at my doorway. He was a translator — a Muslim — who came to the chapel just to wish me a Merry We are called by Jesus to be the light of the Christmas. I was floored, but in the best way pos- world. What we do and say makes a difference in sible. That act of grace meant the world to me, and people’s lives whether it’s helping someone in need, although the translator knew the Bible better than sharing a laugh or spending time in prayer. some of our sailors, it was a real surprise. Speaking of lights, maybe if I start in July of next – The Rev. Ned Alderman is pastor at Epworth UMC in Virginia Beach. year I can create my own tacky light tour. I’ll pur- chase a new sound board, buy a gigantic manger scene, put a star on the roof – (Groan!) – The Rev. Larry Davies is a retired elder in the Virginia Conference.

Unexpected grace By the Rev. Ned Alderman

ere’s what happened to me as a Navy chaplain in Iraq in 2008.

In 2008, I was serving as a Navy chaplain in Iraq with a battalion of 400 sailors. Soon after we ar- rived, my commanding officer (CO) asked me to ar- range for each of our sailors to receive a Christmas A Christmas gift with their name on it. My religious programs specialist and I were able to arrange this, with sup- port from home including three Virginia Conference visitorBy the Rev. Leah DeLong churches — Baylake, my home church; Cheriton; and Travis Chapel, which I had served. It was a lot ecause my “culinary challenged” sister-in- of work, and we were prepared to give out half the law insisted on preparing a Christmas feast gifts on Christmas Eve and half on Christmas morn- for the whole family, my children begged for ing, with everyone opening their gifts together. At Mom’s home cooking and convinced me to have a the last minute, everything went wrong. Some of special dinner at home on Christmas Eve. Early in the gifts were locked in storage and we couldn’t find the day I was busy preparing the meal, but I ran out the key. Others were taken to a compound against of eggs. The easiest thing for me to do was to drive instructions we had given. It was such a debacle two miles to Linden to buy eggs at the little corner that my CO said, “I wouldn’t want to see this hap- store. Sure, I would have to pay double the price, pen again,” which is something you never want to but I would save a lot of time by not driving to Front

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December_2018.indd 25 11/7/2018 7:43:11 PM Royal. Besides, it was snowing. About a mile from home I passed a small figure standing along the side of the road, all bundled up and carrying a huge backpack covered with white snowflakes. We often see Appalachian Trail hikers along that stretch of road but never on Christmas Eve! And never when the ground was covered by several inches of snow. I turned around and went back to find a petite woman, almost as if she was expecting me. I offered her a ride. She said she had to go to Front Royal to pick up a package of supplies at the post office. In an instant I decided to buy eggs in Front Royal, and off we went. During the drive I discovered that my passenger was Margaret Rose, a service at our home church. Margret Rose was a teacher at a nursing school in Scotland who always Presbyterian but seemed comfortable surrounded went on an international hike during the semester by United Methodists. We went back home, got break. This year she was hiking a section of the Ap- the kids settled in bed and took care of last-minute palachian Trail in Virginia. Christmas preparations. The next morning brought Margaret Rose did not get good news at the post the delightful chaos of opening gifts, followed by office. There was no package. It was Friday and the a traditional home-cooked breakfast of scrambled post office would be closed until Monday. Margaret eggs, bacon, fried potatoes, toast and juice. Again, Rose asked me to take her to a local store to get Margaret Rose ate heartily and came back for a few supplies, enough to tide her over until she seconds and thirds. She sat in the back seat with got her package. She intended to return to the trail the children as we drove to Burke to spend Christ- where I found her, walk to a shelter a few miles mas with my in-laws. And yes, when the meal was away and hunker down there for the weekend. served, Margaret Rose filled her plate and went back I was not very happy with her plan. I reminded for more. her that it was Christmas Eve, that it was snowing The words that best describe my response to our and that Monday was three days away. It took some three days with Margaret Rose would be “perplexed convincing, but she finally agreed to come home amazement.” I was perplexed and amazed at a per- with me. I told her that we were having a big Christ- son who would leave home and family at Christmas mas dinner a day early and there would be plenty to hike in a foreign country in the dead of winter all of food for one more. She would have to sleep on by herself and have a heartier appetite than a half the couch, but it would be warm, and she would not dozen growing boys. have to spend Christmas alone. I took her to the post office Monday morning The rest of the family took care of entertaining where she retrieved her package and then drove our guest while I prepared the meal — a turkey with back to the place I found her along the Appalachian all the fixings! And I mean ALL the fixings! We sat Trail. When I returned home, I found on the dining around our big dining room table and enjoyed the room table the small gift we gave her Christmas feast. Our guest, little Margaret Rose, who couldn’t morning. have stood more than five feet on her tiptoes, ate Throughout her visit I kept thinking of Hebrews and ate and ate! I never saw a human being — even 13:2 – “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strang- a big hungry farmer after a long day in the fields — ers, for by doing that some have entertained angels eat as much food as Margaret Rose! She filled up without knowing it.” I have to wonder if indeed we her plate at least three times — and that was before did entertain an angel without knowing it. I suppose dessert! only God and Margaret Rose know for sure! After dinner we went to the Christmas Eve – The Rev. Leah DeLong is pastor of Cool Spring in Middletown.

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December_2018.indd 26 11/7/2018 7:43:12 PM families recognize it as a chance to reconnect with the teams that helped bring their families together. TFC staff recognize the Christmas party as an op- Barbara portunity to celebrate the foster parents and foster children with whom they have built deep relation- Sadler ships. “Foster families are so special,” said Amber Bumbry, UMFS resource parent trainer. “The children and parents work incredibly hard so that they can recallsChristmas create a family. To be able to shower them with love, especially during the holidays, is just an abso- at the orphanage lute pleasure.” arbara Sadler and two of her brothers were residents at United Methodist Family Services (UMFS) in 1945-1957, when it was still an orphanage. “At Christmas, when they could, they would place us with our family, relatives or a Meth- odist family in the conference,” Barbara recalled. “However, there were always some children who stayed at the orphanage through the holidays.” After Barbara left UMFS, she and her late hus- band, Alex, opened their home during the holidays to children living at UMFS. It was just one of the many ways the Sadlers have supported the agency through the years.

Tis the season for UMFS to celebrate foster families oy fills the room, the smiles and laughter speak volumes and, at the end of the evening, hugs abound and misty eyes twinkle under strands of glowing Christmas lights. United Meth- odist Family Services Treatment Foster Care (TFC) program’s annual Christmas party for foster families is one of many examples of how UMFS provides unwavering support to the families it serves. The Christmas party is perhaps TFC’s most highly antici- pated and well-attended event of the year. Foster

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December_2018.indd 27 11/7/2018 7:43:13 PM And there were in the same country shep- .” herds abiding in the field, keeping watch over n their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the e The Lord came upon them, and the glory of the m Lord shone round about them: and they were rd sore afraid. a And the angel said unto them, ow “Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tid- l t Birth of ings of great joy, which shall be to all people. il For unto you is born this day in the city of d w David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. oo And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall e, g Jesus find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, eac lying in a manger.” rth p nd it came to pass in those And suddenly there was with the angel d on ea days, that there went out a de- a multitude of the heavenly hest, an cree from Caesar Augustus that host praising God, the hig all the world should be taxed. and saying, in A (And this taxing was first made od when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)And G all went to be taxed, every one into his to own city. ry And Joseph also went up from Galilee, lo out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Beth- “G lehem; (because he was of the house and And it came to pass, as the angels were lineage of David:) To be taxed with Mary his gone away from them into heaven, the espoused wife, being great with child. shepherds said one to another, Let us now And so it was, that, while they were go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing there, the days were accomplished that which is come to pass, which the Lord hath she should be delivered. made known unto us. And she brought forth her firstborn son, And they came with haste, and found and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying and laid him in a manger; because there in a manger. was no room for them in the inn.

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December_2018.indd 28 11/7/2018 7:43:14 PM And when they had seen it, they made .” known abroad the saying which was told n them concerning this child. And all they that e heard it wondered at those things which m were told them by the shepherds. rd But Mary kept all these things, and pon- a dered them in her heart. ow And the shepherds returned, glorifying and l t praising God for all the things that they had il heard and seen, as it was told unto them. w ood –LUKE 2:1-20 (KJV) , g eace rth p nd on ea ighest, a the h od in o G y t lor “G

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December_2018.indd 29 11/7/2018 7:43:16 PM LIVING THE WORD December 2, 2018 December 9, 2018 The more excellent way Beautiful Feet 1 Corinthians 12-14 Romans 8-10 Key Verse: 1 Corinthians 12:31-13:13 Key Verse: Romans 10:14-17 ong ago, the wind carried frosty everal months ago, my 96-year- moans from humankind to The Holy old mother had her first pedicure. LOne. The joyless sounds of fear, hope- SWearing sandals to church, she was The Rev. Elizabeth lessness and sadness brought deep pain to delighted when people commented on Wright Taylor has the Great Heart. God mused, “Why can’t her “pretty feet.” Mine are forever ugly. served churches in they remember for longer than a gen- Thanks be to God, both pretty and ugly Northern Virginia, Fredericksburg, eration how they are loved? I sent them feet can be beautiful in God’s sight. It’s Staunton and Hamp- prophets, claimed them as mine, and gave what we do with them that matters! ton Roads. Along the them a beautiful land with enough for all. We are living in a time that desperately way, she has had the privilege of meeting I gave them just 10 laws to guide their needs good news. I write these two weeks many saints quietly lives. Yet those who were to teach and before mid-term elections. The political doing good. She re- lead have twisted the laws for their own situation is even uglier than the 50s with tired to Virginia Beach enrichment. The poor are oppressed. Rulers with husband, Walter, its lists of suspected communists or the and their Chessie, are selfish, arrogant and callous. Creation’s 60s with assassinations and race riots. I Maggie. wonders intended to reveal me are taken have hoped, prayed and, prayerfully, lived for granted as hearts harden. Human ears since then for a country and world that no longer hear songs of praise from the would learn that all who call God, Abba, creatures or see joy in the flowers.” Tears are God’s children…that the scriptural began to roll down the Holy face. ‘All’ is inclusive—no more slave or free, The Word spoke, “Let me try once more. male or female, young or old. Send me with a face and voice like theirs. In parallel, my United Methodist Church Maybe if they walk with Us, see Us do jus- is being challenged in ways that shake tice, share mercy and live humbly among the solid foundation of this fifth genera- them, they will learn.” tion Methodist preacher. In February we And so, they planned and prepared. will find if we can move forward for Christ As the time to leave drew near, the Holy “united.” One drew forth the word and said, “You When I am unsettled, the living word are now my son. These humans are diffi- and hymns feed my faith and ground me in cult creatures. You will be born as they are, hope. Romans 8 affirms whose we are and and grow up with parents I have chosen how much we are loved. Two hymns give for you. Your name will be Jesus. You will me courage: “The Church’s One Founda- be our gift to them. Not all will accept you. tion” and “How Firm a Foundation.” The You will be adored and hated; believed and first hymn speaks to the UMC crisis, the scorned. You will know the best of these second to my personal spiritual crisis humans and the worst. I will be with you caused by grief over the above two reali- through it all, loving you and awaiting your ties of this time. Where are the “beautiful return when your human time is finished. feet” bringing good news ? Look around. Those that you nurture will carry on for Train your eyes to see. Take lessons. you. You will live in them and through Remember, your beautiful feet were them. We will touch their spirit with our made for walkin’… into chaos, bringing spirit and show the more excellent way… peace; toward the needy, offering hope; Love. Go in peace, my son. Offer hope and with “neighbors,” sharing Christ’s love spread joy.” ...just because. Why? That’s what Christ

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December_2018.indd 30 11/7/2018 7:43:16 PM did. And, it’s what faith asks of ministry….” Then, the first heart’s eyes and live following us—our purpose, if you will— word of chapter five —in the example of Christ. wherever we are, however we my humble opinion, the We, the people of the church, can, as long as there is breath in most important “therefore” are Christ’s body, each piece us. In so doing, joy will follow. in all of the living word —we uniquely crafted to fit together Thanks be to God! read: Therefore, be imitators of perfectly…especially created God, as beloved children, and live for this time, this place. What do December 16, 2018 in love, as Christ loved us and we look like? Are we joined like Three important words gave himself up for us, a fragrant a wooden puzzle block, impos- Ephesians 1-6 offering and sacrifice to God. sible to figure out, hoarding its treasures? Or, are we more like Key Verse: Ephesians 1:17-19; My hope this Advent is that all Christians will actually strive, a beautiful water pitcher pour- 3:20-4:3 with Christ’s help, to fully be imi- ing God’s grace generously into a o that” and “therefore” tators of God. The example to the thirsty world? (12:15) are three of the most world would be immeasurable. “Simportant words in As the eyes of our hearts open to December 30, 2018 Scripture. These signal important Christ’s love, people would see Love gifts lessons that the writers expect that love in our eyes and actions. Revelation 12-18 readers to learn. We, as we study Christ’s Body alive—Hope for the Key Verse: Revelation 13:9-10 and ponder, are expected to stop world! and read again what led up to evelation! And seven chapters! In that time, these words and what comes December 23, 2018 after them. Henry Riley would wars, persecutions, plagues Have faith and persevere R often say, “When you see ‘there- and destruction. Reading the Hebrews 11-13 fore,’ look around and see what papers and listening to the news it’s there for!” Key Verse: Hebrews 11:1-2; today, I hear of wars, persecu- Since Jeremiah, God has ex- 12:1-2; 14-15a; 13:1-6 tions, plagues, destruction and I pected our hearts enlightened by omorrow night, Christians wonder, will the heavenly gifts increased knowledge of whose around the world celebrate offered by the holy birth —hope, we are and why. (31:33-34) In TChrist’s birth. We, you and I, love, joy and peace—ever find Ephesians, we learn beyond any pastors and laity, are the church’s fulfillment in this world? As al- doubt that the church is the body shepherds. Will we open our ways, the living word brings good of Christ, (1:22-23); we are“… sleepy eyes and see heaven’s news. Today, it is Ch. 13: 10c, a holy temple…built together excitement at this new coming? “Here is a call for the endurance spiritually into a dwelling place Will we be enlivened to run and and faith of the saints.” for God.” In Chapter three, Paul see…to go and tell this new thing Ah ha! An epiphany moment! prays for the church in Ephe- that has happened? Or, will we Always, hold tightly to the truth sus and, through the power of slightly shift our position, get and endure. Years ago, diagnosed the living word, for us—Christ’s more comfortable and go back to with my first cancer, I heard God followers today. Continuing our sleep…certain it has all been just ask, “Do you believe what you study, we hit a “therefore” in a dream? A nice dream, yes, but preach?” I admit to pondering 4:1, finding in that chapter how totally impractical. that question a while. Finally, I we are to live with each other, Sisters and brothers, this is was able to answer with assur- “making every effort to maintain God’s hope, that we will receive (Con’t on page 32: “LIVING WORD”.) the unity of the spirit in the bond the Holy Gift with humility and of peace.” We learn that each is gratitude and allow Christ into The Living Word devotions will coincide with the 2018 Bible Reading Challenge from Bishop Lewis. given grace and different gifts “to our lives to transform our priori- Find the December schedule on pg. 34. Find all equip the saints for the work of ties so that we might see with 2018 readings at www.vaumc.org.

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December_2018.indd 31 11/7/2018 7:43:16 PM CLERGY & DIACONAL DEATHS Frank Fender, 78, of Leesburg, (“LIVING WORD” con’t from previous page.) died Oct. 19, 2018. He is survived The Rev. Rita by this wife, the Rev. Judy Fend- ance, “Absolutely!” From that A. Callis of er, retired deacon. time to this, the answer is the Richmond, died same, “Absolutely!” God’s gifts Oct. 5, 2018. Jenny Aledia, sister of Deacon- to me then were the assurance of She served as a ess Emma Samson, Resurrection faith and the strength to endure. United Meth- UMC in Chesapeake, died Oct. 18. When I retired, Walt and I took odist minister the great westward land trip. It for 40 years, Rachel Littleton Jones, 101, of was planned to last three weeks. beginning with her first church Roanoke, died Oct. 17, 2018. Her It lasted six. Walt says that was in Northumberland County and late husband, Dr. George Wesley because I asked him to stop every 10 minutes to take a picture! her most recent appointment at Jones, was a Virginia Conference All along the way, great rays of Lakeside UMC in Henrico. She pastor. also served as superintendent for blessings appeared, in strangers, in the ever changing landscape, in the Farmville District. Lovingly Jacquelyn Grace Moberly, 89, the peace found in each other. In referred to as “Rev. Rita,” she died Oct. 10, 2018. Her son, the devoted her life to the church northwest California, we pulled Rev. Bill Moberly, is a pastor at and to her community through off the highway to find a small St. Matthew’s UMC in Annandale. teaching, counseling and pastoral town for lunch. Walt, always care. fascinated by ancient Greek, sud- Frances Haller Jones, 94, of denly exclaimed loudly, “EURE- Virginia Beach, died Oct. 9, 2018. The Rev. Tracy KA! Wow! I have found it!” Both She is survived by her son, the of us laughed as we entered the R. Bair, 70, died Rev. Dr. Steve Jones, retired. town of Eureka, CA. Oct. 14, 2018, I am so glad I read into Ch. 19. in Oklahoma. Betty Fisher Goodson, 90, of There, in verse one, is “After this He served South Hill, died Oct. 5, 2018. She I heard what seemed to be the Liberty UMC loud voice of a great multitude Bealton before was the widow of the Rev. A.D. in heaven, saying, ‘Hallelujah!’” moving to Goodson. Hallelujah is my favorite expres- Missouri to serve a UMC there. Susan Dieterich Holland, 74, of sion of joy! This Epiphany, look for eureka The Rev. Carl Appomattox, died Sept. 25. She was a former part-time local pas- and hallelujah moments. Claim Evans Cosslett, tor in the Virginia Conference. them! Celebrate! Give thanks! 84, of Colonial They are love gifts from our God Heights, died who hasn’t given up on us, yet! Sept. 30, 2018. He was Pas- tor Emeritus of Trinity UMC Chesterfield at the time of his Notice: The Advocate, due to the increasing number of entries for this section each month, will only death. publish death notices for individuals rather than full obituaries. To have additional information published, please contact the Advocate office at advocate@ Sally Easter, mother of the Rev. vaumc.org or mail to c/o Communications Office, John Hall, pastor of Bethel UMC, P.O. Box 5606 Glen Allen, VA 23058-5606. The Com- munications Office receives obituaries from a num- died on Oct. 19. The memorial ber of sources, but to ensure we receive a particular service will be at a later date. notice, please contact us with copy.

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December_2018.indd 33 11/7/2018 7:43:19 PM FROM THE BISHOP Lewis household. This special Bishop's Bible Challenge night was the time we gathered around the kitchen table to help readings for December my mother finish cooking her famous fruitcake in order to leave December 1 1 Corinthians 9-11 a slice for Santa. I must admit I December 2 1 Corinthians 12-14 was never an avid eater of mom’s December 3 1 Corinthians 15-16 fruitcake, but I couldn’t let her know that secret. I didn’t really December 4 2 Corinthians 1-4 like all the fruit ingredients but December 5 2 Corinthians 5-9 I loved the nuts and the aroma that lingered throughout the December 6 2 Corinthians 10-13 night. December 7 Acts 20:1-3, Romans 1-3 When I was young, my mother December 8 Romans 4-7 would pour a little wine over the cake; so the cake wouldn’t December 9 Romans 8-10 dry out. My siblings and I would December 10 Romans 11-13 sneak a sip when she was not December 11 Romans 14-16 looking. Little did we know that’s why ALL of a sudden we would December 12 Acts 20:4-23:35 My fondest be deliriously sleepy. I’m not re- December 13 Acts 24-26 ally sure if Mom knew we were Christmas sipping her wine, or if she used December 14 Acts 27-28 it as a method to send us to bed December 15 Colossians 1-4, memory early. Only thing I remember is Philemon 1 that one by one we would ven- y fondest memory ev- ture off to our rooms and wait in December 16 Ephesians 1-6 ery Christmas happened anticipation for Christmas morn- December 17 Philippians 1-4 on Christmas Eve in the ing! M December 18 1 Timothy 1-6 December 19 Titus 1-3 December 20 1 Peter 1-5 December 21 Hebrews 1-6 December 22 Hebrews 7-10 December 23 Hebrews 11-13 December 24 2 Timothy 1-4 December 25 2 Peter 1-3, Jude 1 December 26 1 John 1-5 December 27 2 John 1, 3 John 1 December 28 Revelation 1-5 December 29 Revelation 6-11 December 30 Revelation 12-18 December 31 Revelation 19-22

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December_2018.indd 34 11/7/2018 7:43:20 PM ONE LAST WORD 1. Everyone dies. 2. Everyone has the same amount of hours in a day. Each day, about 50-70 billion cells are made and die in your body, your mind will process thousands of thoughts, you will encounter new and familiar faces. You have the opportunity to choose to get out of bed in the morning, go to work and have a good experience while living. Some days are better than others, some are longer, but no matter what, today is the most important day of your life. You alone have the power to influence someone’s life for better or for worse. We believe we have time. We’ll always have more time to procrastinate, to put it off until tomorrow. The most Although tomorrow was never a guarantee. Until you breathe, you alone have the power to do something important day with your life every day. Then comes death. Death will never have victory over you. The Apostle By Paul Gomez Paul spells this out in his letter to the Romans by say- ing “neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor e count days as small fractions of our lives. things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor It can be easy to take them for granted. Each height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will Wnight we close our eyes to sleep we make a be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ promise with our subconscious to believe that we’ll Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39). Ultimately, death wake up again. Days are guaranteed in a world where will lose its sting when this life is over. social media memories only count the years, but Understanding and accepting that time is limited, what’s in a day? ask yourself: Starting right now, what can I do in 1,000 A few weeks ago, we had a birthday celebration days? What about 5,000? 10,000? for a fellow coworker. She found her desk covered in This article is not supposed to be a depressing state- decorations in honor of her special day, organized by ment to remind you of certain death. On the contrary, other early-rising coworkers. While we were slicing I wrote this in hopes that you would celebrate your into a delicious cake, I noticed a blue poster hung up mortality by owning each day. Make a legacy. Make on her wall. It read “18,250 Days Old.” I pulled out my your memorial the kind where people aspire to live a phone and Googled my age in days. I had just turned life full of growth, excitement, and love. Enjoy your 7,680 days old that afternoon. Thoughts ran through family, fall in love, travel. my head at hundreds of miles per hour. ‘What have I When did time ever solve anything? You are the done with my life?’ ‘What will I do with it?’ catalyst for change in your life, community and gen- When I see the length of my life in days, I grow eration. nervous that I have not yet lived enough. I have a list How many days old are you today? What will you of things I still want to do, such as getting married, do with the remaining days you have? starting a family and leaving a lasting legacy of the life – Paul Gomez is the Manager, Hispanic/Latino Seeker Communica- tions at United Methodist Communications. This article was posted on the I lived. Rethink Church website. Read the full article at www.rethinkchurch.org. Aside from all the various differences people have, every single one of us only has two things completely in common:

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