SUNDAY, JANUARY 31, 2021 (PAGE 3) SACRED SPACE FORBEARANCE helps face difficulties How to be a failure? Akhtar Ul-nisa it to grow strong and pure we need to be regular in our spiritual practices and assert our Ankush Sharma stories", nobody gives a damn to the "failure stories". But it Forbearance is the ability to respond to a independence from the desire in the mind. It needs must not be ignored that the failed people have faced multi- situation of failure, disappointment, pain patience, presence, grace and focus. Failure! Yes, you have read right. This write-up will surf dimensional hurdles in their struggle and are more experi- you through the various paths leading to the failure. It may enced compared to the toppers especially those who got suc- or conflict with understanding and Significance of forbearance seem absurd but believe me, it would make sense in a few cess early. It is not to say that the toppers are not insightful minutes read. In fact, it has something crucial to offer to rather what I mean is that some people have inbuilt brilliance The quality of forbearance is of the highest importance composure. those who are aspiring to achieve success in their lives. or a good schooling background which might not be every- to every human being. Forbearance and nonviolence are It is bearing the physical, mental and emotional pain Success may have different meanings to different people but one's case. So, it's the failed people who can actually eluci- manifestation of inner strength. Reactivity and retaliation with strong and steady faith without lamenting or worry- the paths leading there have a common and a simple princi- date the worst struggle scenarios and impediments allowing make us to lose precious energy, forbearance on the other ing. It is all about self regulation and patience. ple i.e. hard work. However, sometimes we have to face fail- the aspirants to get prepared from the very start. Toppers are hand strengthenes our character as well as our capacity to Forbearance is the capacity to forgive the offender with- ure repeatedly even after the hard work. Why does it happen good at teaching the helpful things to do and failed aspirants do good deeds and get inner peace. out expecting any apology or repentance. It is the capaci- so? To understand this, we have to divide our work into two are good at highlighting the things not to do. Both are equal- We always use the word ‘because’ for excuses or to jus- ty to forgive offender before he or she repents. types of activities, let's term them useful and harmful. The ly important. tify our behavior. Forbearance help us to divide the word useful activities are helping us towards success and others It is defined as a stance that involve choosing not to Now, the most misleading suggestion to the aspirants is to “because” into two parts ‘Be’ and ‘cause’ to make it bene- are pulling us back. So it is no wrong to say that useful activ- respond to other’s harm or injustice with anger and study 6-8 hours a day, but we should know that the time ficial for us. Be refers to being involved and cause refers ities are the answer to the question 'How to be successful? doesn't matter instead the quantity and quality of study mat- vengefulness. It is tolerance based on conscious accept- to good work. So, forbearance help us not to use the word And harmful activities answer 'How to be a failure?' ters. It's always wise to have a topic or a chapter as a study ance situation of pain and hardships. When one learns to because to give excuses, but instead use it to empower Sometimes our hard work is wrapped up by such harmful target of a day or a week rather than having just a time figure separate the anger from the angry person, he or she is ourselves. habits that destroy its value as well. Hence, knowing the which won't reveal to you the quality of yourstudy. The topic able to drop all the grudges against the person and get the BE A CAUSE in creating a change. activities leading us to failure can actually help us to be suc- targeted study would make this study-hours idea useless as strength to forgive abusers. . It is a natural expression of BE A CAUSE in keeping people happy. cessful. All we have to do is to do away with these activities. the hours may vary according to the capability of the person compassion which is key to greater well being. BE A CAUSE in making this world a better and peace- Being born and growing up in a populous country like and his grasping power. Also, to explain further, if you start The three pillar of forbearance are tolerance, patience ful place to live in. India is an altogether different experience as compared to the calculating time, then who would decide that you studied and forgiveness. When one choose to becomes mindful in rest of the world. Every minute, dozens of children take birth In a conflict especially in religiously in the prescribed time and not spared even a jiff to here, not just to live but to compete as well. Competition is a an intimate relationship the distractions? In today's world, the biggest distraction is lifelong companion of every Indian, especially in its urban the internet. It is a general habit of the students to open the where emotional investment sphere. It might be true with other countries as well but I am phone while studying for some study purpose like Wikipedia, are high if either of the two concerned with the Indians. From the very birth parties- are able to bring to the death, Indians grow through hundreds of more forbearance into their competitions, scaling from getting a bed in a hos- interaction, they have an pital for birth to getting a space in the excellent chance of insuring ShamshanGhat /graveyard for the cremation. that difficult exchanges not At home, the morning rises with the compe- to spiral into an exchange of tition of reading the newspapers. Also, the strug- reactivity. Generally in close gle for using the bathroom is not uncommon. The relationships where both the higher levels of struggle start after we step out of sides take care for each our homes. The roads are stowed with vehicles other, there is a lot more moving in chaos rupturing the traffic rules. The room for people to bring actual struggle starts with the use of public trans- their best through patience port. You need good stars to grab a seat in the and understanding. buses, fully packed with the passengers. Further, Forbearance helps us to a mere mention of Government offices is enough in this context. Either you should have enough face the difficulties and time to wait in the long queues or be influential adversities of life with opti- enough to skip the queue. Corruption is also a mism grit, determination byproduct of this competition. and contentment. A forbear- In contemporary times, the competition ing person didn’t whine, which is on the trend list especially among our groan or complain and youth is about securing a slot that may be on a a difficult situation, one tends to be peaceful and happy, always has good faith on God for the positive things to bus, train, or in a school, college, and most instead of being right. This is when forbearance comes happen. A successful person is one who can lay a firm importantly securing a job. Every student since into practice and we start believing that our patience will foundation with the bricks that other throws at him. the day s/he enters the school is raced up for the achieve more than our force. You must have heard of an oyster a small mollusc who competitions. The competition to get higher produce pearls and it lives in sea. Occasionally, a grain of grades than friends, to get into a good college Cultivating Forbearance sand enters the oyster shell and starts irritating the sensi- after school, then to get a decent job after col- lege;throughout this journey, competition stays with them as tive tissue .But, instead of complaining that ‘the sea did dictionary, etc. but then most of them end up browsing Forbearance is best cultivated under adverse circum- a stressful companion. Each time it gets greater and even not taken enough care of it and the nature has not closed through social media sites, YouTube and all. It takes a blink stances, and therefore it is better to welcome hardships greater. to know that hours have passed; pages of the book keep wait- instead of regarding them as problems. Perhaps the first the shell properly, the oyster take responsibility of the Desiring a decent job in India means to get ready for a ing to be turned over. Further, wasting a lot of time talking to step towards practicing forbearance on a daily basis is by things single mindedly and efficiently engages in the task fierce contest in the competitive exams. These exams call for friends, eating, playing games in the name of relaxation also focusing on ourselves and our situation than on other of getting rid of the irritating grain of sand. hard work with the right kind of strategies. Everyone starts jabs the quality study hours. It is not that all such activities people. Be mindful of every hassle be it slow traffic or a And guess what happens in the process? preparation with the Google search "How to crack a compet- should be prohibited; instead, you should remember the fact long queue, so that these small and everyday things may By becoming a cause’ the oyster transform a useless, itive exam?" Then it surfs through various strategies, books, that everything is helpful only when used in a healthy man- not allow us to lose our mental balance. common grain of sand into a rare pearl! coaching, and all the things that Google would suggest to do ner. First we should practice it with people with whom we As a human we can learn a great lesson from this activ- to be successful. Then the suggestion of toppers also holds The last point is regarding meeting with more and more do not have strong emotional attachment. We can then ity of oyster that whenever life throws us an obstacle or a great importance for the aspirants. people. It can also prove harmful by diluting your ideas, practice this in our family where we have to interact on challenge, instead of complaining ‘because of this, Many aspirants fail to make it possible even after huge hence acting as a demoralizing force. To be more clear on daily basis and extensively and also because our identities ‘because of that’ we can simply choose ‘ to be (a) cause’ suggestions, hard work, and strategies. These failures can this, you should welcome new ideas to the extent it keeps and emotions are closely attached with theirs. It is the and convert that adversity into an opportunity to do contribute to their demoralization but, it kicks open a win- intact the originality of your thought process. Nobody can most challenging area of our life where we ought not to something better! There are two ways of meeting difficul- dow to introspect their strategy and the approach towards it. succeed with all acquired thoughts; it may mislead or even In this process of introspection, many of them would find become reactive. When in our family we go through a dif- ties. You alter the difficulties, or you alter yourself to meet deviateyou from your goal. ficult situation we undergo a lot of unhappiness, anger, lacunas in the strategy's execution realizing that they devot- I would finish my write up with a few words about the them. ed their precious time in doing not only those things which hatred, fear and similar negative feelings. At such time we ones receiving repeated failures. They are the ones who know Forbearance is the attitude of strong, brave and respon- are important for the success but also those which are not should recognize with awareness that these feelings will a list of things that contribute to one's failure. S/he knows sible people. Such people are always aware of their stake in important at all and in fact, they are counterproductive. how to handle failures again and again and stay motivated intensify the problems and effects our inner well being as any situation and take responsibility to maintain harmony Here, we should discuss the suggestions people forced towards the goal. That's the most precious thing you need to well as our relationship. and develop an energetic uplift in the life of people around upon the aspirants especially by the successful ones. In this learn from them; that list of activities to ignore and the Forbearance is directly related to will power. Our them. Goodness is the only investment that never fails to process of getting suggestions, most of the aspirants usually mantra to not lose hope. At the same time, it no way means, capacity to bear the inevitable ups and down of life and is return a dividend. May God give us awareness, courage and filter out the suggestions of the ones who faced failure with a success stories hold no value but the point is failure stories proportional to the strength and purity of our will. The strength to conquer our mind so that before triumphing petty argument that 'How could their suggestions work for us also do. "When you know how to be a failure, you never get a will is usually held captive by desires in the mind. To free over others we triumph over ourselves. if it didn't for themselves.' So everyone cares for the "Success failure." PERSONALITY Sahir’s songs have tinge of melancholy in the idea of romance Sunil Fernandes view not shared by Dada Burman. This ego-clash spelled the Author Nasreen Munni Kabir was the guest at death-knell of what could have the greatest musical partnership in the "tête-à-tea" organised by Prabha Khaitan “Tu Hindu Banega Na Mussalman Banega, Bollywood. Dada Burman-Sahir, though aesthetically compatible Foundation. In the course of the conversation, Kabir Insaan Ki Aulad Hai, Insaan Banega, proved temperamentally incompatible and never collaborated spoke about her latest book In the Year of Sahir 2021 Maalik Ne Har Insaan ko Insaan Banaya, again in any other film post-Pyaasa. Humne Usey Hindu ya Mussalman Banaya, But the end of the association with SD Burman and Guru Dutt Diary which is based on poet-lyricist Sahir Kudrat ne toh Bakshi thi Humein Ek Hi Dharti, opened another significant avenue for Sahir. He successfully col- Ludhianvi. Souvik Ghosh brings excerpts Humney Kahin Bharat, Kahin Iran Banaya” laborated with other music directors like Ravi, Roshan, Jaidev, How did you discover Sahir? Can you go back to and Khayyam. This phase marked the initiation of a long and those memories? [You shall neither be a Hindu nor a Muslim, hugely successful relationship with the Chopra brothers – BR and Honestly to me, it was Pyaasa. The cinema was shown in You were born a Human and a Human thou shall remain, Yash. Naya Daur (1957), Gumraah (1963), Waqt (1965), Humraaz London. It was the songs. The Urdu was difficult. So I didn't The Almighty created only Human Beings, (1967), and Daag (1973). understand the whole meaning of his words. But I think he is But Humans created Hindus and Muslims, This phase also won him the first of his two Filmfare Best amazingly romantic in one way, but underneath that there is a Mother Nature created Earth, Lyricist Award – for ‘Taj Mahal’ (1963). “Jo Vaada Kiya” and “Pao Humans tore it into different countries] layer of melancholy and that struck me more. He manages to Choo Lene Do” both Lata-Rafi duets have mesmerising lyrics. describe emotions in very simple and effective terms. But there Sahir Ludhianvi’s lyrics for the eponymously titled song in BR However, mere two Filmfare Awards for a lyricist of Sahir’s cali- is a sad ending. They are not happy songs. I think the romantic Chopra’s 1959 film – ‘Dhool ka Phool’ seemed as relevant for post- bre is a matter of major embarrassment for an award show which songs that we remember are the sad ones. When we are sad, partition India as prescient for present-day India, where some- claims to be the Indian equivalent of the Oscars. we listen to sad songs and not the disco songs. He really con- thing as innocuous and personal as a meal or a marriage can The second Filmfare Best Lyricist Award he received was for nects to people who are discerning and caring about the world incredibly, either land you in jail if you are lucky, or get you Yash Chopra’s Amitabh Bachchan starrer ‘Kabhie Kabhie’ (1976) but have a tinge of melancholy in the idea of romance. – a fitting denouement to an outstanding career in films. Sahir’s lynched if you aren’t. And he talks about the deeper issues and philoso- lyrics straddled diverse worlds. He was outstanding at penning 2021 is the birth centenary of one of India’s finest ever poet- phies of life and all. When I opened the diary, the lyricist Sahir Ludhianvi who was born on March 8, 1921. His poignantly romantic lyrics as he was with poems on social causes first page I landed upon was Gulzar saab talking untimely death, four decades ago in 1980, leaves a vast majority and communal harmony. about Man Re Na Kahe Na Dhir Dhare (song). I think of Indians who do not have more than a fleeting acquaintance Kabhie Kabhie was similar to Pyaasa released two decades that one song encapsulates life as it is for many of with the genius whose lyrics illuminated our cinema screens and A chance introduction with the great SD Burman led Sahir to ago. Just like Pyaasa, Kabhie Kabhie too was the story of a poet – us. Again in the past nine months (Covid-19 era), our homes for almost three decades. pen the lyrics for his first hit song – “Thandi Hawayeein, Lehra Ke Amit. But the “treatment” was different. Guru Dutt’s Vijay was a that has spoken to us so deeply. Abdul Hayee was born in Ludhiana and took the ‘pen name of Aayein” sung by Lata Mangeshkar for ‘Naujawan’ (1951). hero whose tragic travails would have the Greeks vigorously nod- Yes, absolutely. That's the right song for lockdown. But the ‘Sahir’-literally meaning ‘magician’ and metaphorically – SD “Dada” Burman had a keen eye for talent and could easily ding in approval. The pathos that Vijay faced in Pyaasa, was more fact of the matter is that many people have remarked that ‘enchanting’. In consonance with the then-existing trend, he spot the genius in Sahir, whose anthology of poems – ‘Talkhiyaan’ on a societal level. His chief angst was against the selfishness, actually he had such mastery over language, be it in Hindi or appended ‘Ludhianvi’ to his name to signify his place of origin. (Bitterness) was already published in 1944 when Sahir was mere- hypocrisy and avarice that had embedded itself in our society. Urdu, that he knew how to convey the very deep philosophical Sahir didn’t have a very happy childhood. His mother, Sardar ly in his early twenties. A consistently remarkable feature of However, the travails of the poet Amit in Kabhie Kabhie were ideas in simple terms. Begum, was the 11th of 12 wives that his feudal landlord father Sahir’s writings over his career was that his lyrics were invariably more on a personal, romantic level. Kabhie Kabhie wasn’t as dark What was special about Sahir when it came to film Chaudhary Fazl Mohammad had. His parents were estranged and central to the film and its plot. and melancholic as Pyaasa was. After all, Yash Chopra’s oeuvre later divorced and his father’s vindictiveness meant emotional The combination of Sahir Ludhianvi and S.D.Burman was was romance whereas Guru Dutt’s forte was a tragedy. The films lyrics? and economic crises for the young impressionable poet. It was matchless ALAS! 'PYASA” WAS THEIR PARTING GIFT TO CINE were an apt reflection on the respective directors’ cinematic per- Most of the Urdu poets of that era had to work in films in famously said of Sahir, that all his life, the great poet really loved GOERS sona. order to earn money because publishing was not paying money only one woman (his mother) and really hated only one man (his The 1950s and 1960s was an era, where Music Directors struck The title song of Kabhie Kabhie was the last super hit song so much. He worked with Arnold brothers and Chetan Anand. fruitful partnerships with specific song-writers like Shankar- father)! sung by veteran singer Mukesh who passed away within months So from the very start, he was not working for C-grade films Jaikishan with Shailendra and Hasrat Jaipuri, Naushad with During his formative years, Sahir was influenced by a veritable of the film’s release. This remained the ultimate heartbreak song but with the top people of the era like Dev Anand and SD Bur- Shakeel Badayuni and Laxmikant-Pyarelal with Anand Bakshi. AAA-list of Urdu Poetry:- Allama Iqbal, Faiz Ahmed Faiz, Majaj for generations of Indians. man, who were very educated and sophisticated people. He Similarly, Dada Burman teamed up with Sahir and in a span of Sahir never married. But that didn’t mean that he wasn’t was moving in an educated milieu. He was not asked to lower Lucknawi (maternal uncle of another famous poet-lyricist Javed merely seven years, this prolific pair of musical wizards gave us 15 Akhtar) and Josh Malihabadi. linked to women. In a delightful irony, that only poets seem capa- the tone of his lyrics ever. films, most of them musical super-hits like Baazi (1951 – Guru ble of, one of the earliest women in his life was Ishar – an ana- So his literary and poetic elements were never compro- The Partition of the country circa 1947, his aversion for com- Dutt’s maiden directorial venture), Jaal (1952), Taxi Driver munalism and his association with the then fledgling Progressive gram of his own pen name – Sahir! mised yet it wasn't so obscure that couldn't reach out to the (1954), Devdas and Munimji (1955) Funtoosh (1956) and the The stories of his romantic liaison with noted writer Amrita common people. Both were nicely balanced. Writers Movement (PWM) meant that he decided to settle in sec- biggest of them all – Pyaasa (1957). ular India (Bombay) rather than the freshly minted Islamic Pritam were legion. Legend has it that they used to spend hours I will say the most difficult thing was to appeal to every- Considered by many as the finest film ever made in Bollywood, with each other, sitting silently and soaking in their respective body. One can only do that if he masters something and speaks Republic next door, as did most of the leading poets-writers of the Pyaasa is the tragic story of Vijay, the poet, who is unable to rec- PWM. company. Sahir used to chain-smoke and Amrita Pritam used to in a very straightforward language. When one knows some- oncile to the selfish, insensitive, materialistic and exploitative simply watch him–for hours at a stretch. When Sahir left, Amrita The PWM was a left-leaning, staunchly anti-imperialistic col- thing, he or she will say it simply but will beat around the bush ways of the world. His poetry is the only vehicle for him to express Pritam would alight the used butts of the cigarettes that Sahir had lection of the finest collection of writers-poets under any single if someone doesn't know. He knew how to use language and in his anguish and Sahir’s lyrics combined brilliantly with Dada just consumed. For reasons unknown, they never married. Sahir what context. He also knew the character. He also used to roof. Saadat Hasan Manto, Munshi Premchand, Mulk Raj Anand, Burman’s earthy tunes and Guru Dutt’s cinematic histrionics. was linked at various times to noted playback singer Sudha write the poetry, lyrics and the song which will match with the Ismat Chugtai, Krishan Chander, Rajinder Singh Bedi, Firaq “Jaane Woh Kaise Log they Jinko, Pyar ko Pyar Mila” Malhotra and Urdu writer Hajra Masroor, with whom there were character of a particular film. Gorakhpuri, Jan Nisar Akhtar, Kaifi Azmi, Amrita Pritam, and (Hemant Kumar) “Jinhe Naaz Hai Hind Par, Woh Kahan Hai” reports of an engagement too. Don't you think he had reached out to people because Sahir himself were the leading lights of this movement, which and “Yeh Duniya Mil Bhi Jaaye Toh Kya Hai” (Mohd Rafi) – are Sahir passed away on 25th October 1980 due to a massive wanted to strive for societal equality and give a voice to the mil- absolutely unforgettable classics, capturing mood, melancholy of a team work with the director and composer? heart attack, while in the midst of a card game with friends. He Absolutely. A film is made by a team and not just a direc- lions of underprivileged and poor through their literature and and pathos of the doomed poet. was only 59 and I wonder what would have been his life and ours poetry. Many poets of PWM tried their hand at writing lyrics for Ironically, in their biggest success, lay the seeds of their inter- tor. It is more so in the Hindi cinema because there are various too had fate not dealt him with such a cruel hand on that evening. fragmentations in the creation of the film. But the director the Bombay Film Industry, which post-partition, was the unri- minable discord. Sahir believed that the lyricist had a more (The author is an Advocate-on-Record, practicing in the Supreme Court of chooses the right person for each fragment. (IBNS-TWF) valed, undisputed centre for movie-making in the sub-continent. important role to play in a song compared to the music director, a India.)