DOCSLIB.ORG

U.S. Launches Pre-Emptive Strike Against Mars

Total Page：16

File Type：pdf, Size：1020Kb

Download full-text PDF Read full-text
U.S. Launches Pre-Emptive Strike Against Mars 7 ue ss , I Wednesday, January 14, 2004 FREE IV 10¢ in Canada l. o V U.S. Launches The SlantPre-emptive Strike Against Mars w w w . th e sl an t.n et The Voice Of The Slant Staff - Since 1886 INSIDETHISISSUE SPACE Pre-emptive Strike on the 5Red Planet DRUGS Try Hemlex For Lower Blood 7 Pressure INFANTICIDE Steve Irwin Talks About 8Crocs Other News 2 Fucked Image 4 From The Editor 4 Bastard Confession 10 Around The Loop 11 Horoscopes 11 Advice Column 12 Top Ten List 12 2 OTHERNEWS The Slant - www.theslant.net - January 14, 2004 Angela Bassett To Star Howard Dean Not Happy With His New Puppy Annoying In 'How Stella Got Her Long Distance Plan Over the holiday break, senior Meredith Groove Back' Prequel Former Governor of Gray adopted a puppy, much to the chagrin On the heels of "How Stella Vermont and current of her roommate and friends. "She goes on Got Her Groove Back" and frontrunner for the and on about how "How Stella Got Her Democratic Party's cute it is, and I'll Groove Back 2: Electric Presidential nomina- admit it's sort of Boogaloo," Angela Bassett tion, Howard Dean, is fluffy, but Christ, all shocked the entertainment reportedly "not happy" it does is pee and community yesterday by announcing that with his long distance chew on shoes," said she would be starring in the prequel, "How telephone plan. her roommate, John Stella Lost Her Groove In The First Place." Recently, Dean recieved a courtesy call from Sands. "I would kill "I think it will really tie up all those loose Sprint, informing him that he could be sav- it in the night if she ends in the the 'How Stella Got Her Groove ing upwards of 3 cents a minute on long dis- didn't sleep with it. Back' franchise," stated Bassett, adding, "In tance calls. According to Sprint telemarketer Mary-Kate Oh, and it smells." Gray, oblivious to the this one, I start off with my groove fully Dajuan Jones, Dean was not happy about discomfort she causes her peers by forcing intact, but I eventually end up loosing my this. "That dude crazy," said Jones, "As soon them to be around the dog, continues to groove. It was a completely new and chal- as I told him he could save by switching 150 gush about the puppy. "Zoe is so smart! lenging role for me as an actress." from his current plan, he yelled, 'Aargh! She already knows how to sit! Isn't that pre- Days MCI will pay for this injustice!!! remaining cious?" Her boyfriend of three years, Jay Tribute Performed For Deceased Aaaarrrgghh!!!' and I think I heard him until June Todd, is less than enthused. "She doesn't Tribute Band Singer punching kittens in the background. Damn, 13, 2004. rub my belly when I sit," said Todd, visably Wayne Robinson, 34, it's just a few cents, why'd he have to get all On that agitated. "And I don't think she's gonna rub glorious of Davidson County, crazy?" day, twins anything else anytime soon. Stupid dog." died late Monday Mary-Kate when he lost control of Mars Still Red, Covered in Rocks and Ashley Former First Lady Insults Well his pickup truck, driv- With the unveiling of the Mars rover's new Olsen will, Respected Cultural Icon at long last, ing left of center and images of the sur- turn 18. During her endorsement speech for Senate into the path of an face of Mars, the candidate Nancy Farmer last Wednesday at oncoming tractor-trail- general public and a St. Louis Democratic fundraiser, New York er rig. A tribute con- scientific commu- Ashley Senator Hillary Clinton prefaced a quote by cert is planned for nity alike have Gandhi with the line, "He ran a gas station Friday in memory of Robinson, a popular expressed disap- down in St. Louis." An eery silence filled the area singer in a Lynyrd Skynyrd tribute pointment with room as the crowd appeared both shocked band. Rambo Sinclair, another local Lynard what has been and horrified at the New York Senator's Skynard cover band singer, had only good found. "Shit," said attempt at humor, while Clinton proceeded words to say about Robinson. “Shit man, NASA director to tap the microphone repeatedly and ask, I’m gonna miss him. Nobody sang ‘Sweet John Landers. "I "Is this thing on?" After pausing, the former Home Alabama’ like him. Except of course, mean, give us a freaking break. All we asked first lady continued, "No, seriously, the last Lynard Skynard. And I ain’t too bad myself, for was a monolith, or even a river or some- time I made a successful nonviolent move- if I don’t say.” Plans for Robinson’s memorial thing. But no, more fucking red rocks." Jerry ment, I was on the John. Huh? Huh? Ah, I'm include a performance of a cover of Wilson, local resident, concurs. "Yup, it's just fucking with ya. Come on, can't you Robinson's band's cover of 'Freebird.' boring alright. Maybe Jupiter will be better." people take a joke? Geez..." Saddam's New Year's Resolution Thwarted Deposed tyrant Saddam Hussein recently expressed dismay from his prison cell, say- OBEEFTHE INDUSTRYR NEWS REPORT ing that now that he is a POW, his New Year's Resolutions have been Mad Cow Just Having Period thwarted. "How am I going to start Atkins on Anxiety over a reported case of mad cow disease has calmed after the this starchy prison food recent discovery that the cow in question was simply menstruating, not diet?" asked a haggard, suffering from spongiform encephalitus. "She had all the signs of mad yet noticeably plump cow: bucking and snorting, falling down, eating ice cream, ramming bulls Hussein. "I'm also falling and sniping at other cows," said a Canadian government official. "Things behind schedule on would have been cleared up faster if we'd just noticed the Kotex. Our those weapons of mass destruction that I bad." was, um...not making." Mad, bloated cow MASTHEAD 01.14.2004 3 Reading Versus - Since 1886 (just kidding!) CONTENTS 188 Madison Sarratt Student Center 2301 Vanderbilt Place NEWS VU# 351669 Station B Nashville, TN 37235 OTHER NEWS: When Cows Go Mad . .2 Phone (615)322-3291 Fax (615)-343-2756 website www.theslant.net CLARIFICATIONS: Younger pussy . .3 STAFF MARS: Earth Strikes Back . .5 Editor-in-Chief Meredith Gray OBESITY: Still too fucking fat . .6 Managing Editor David Barzelay Head Writer Andrew Banecker DEMOCRATS: So many weakest links . .7 Technical Consultant Brad Ploeger Editors COLUMNS & HUMOR Tim Boyd Robert Saunders Copy Editors CROCODILE HUNTER: Babies Taste Like Chicken . .8 Audrey Peters Melanie Siemens Cartoonist Jason Carpentier Distribution Managers LUXEMBOURG: Thoroughly Evil . .8 Andrew Collazzi Brett DiCio Doorstop Jacob Grier POINT/COUNTERPOINT: Jerry Knuth . .9 Contributing Writers Evan Alston Diabetus Colin Dinsmore Peter Grant Richard Green AROUND THE LOOP: Ceaf-alicious . .11 Rob Hilton Howard Lee Keith Leeman Ceaf Lewis HOROSCOPES: Worst Ones Ever . .11 Rebecca Ohly Stephanie Schacht Liz Vennum Alumni Contributors SLANT FEATURES Ben Stark Jeff Woodhead Editors Emeritus LACK OF CARTOONIST: more Ceaf . .4 Joe Wong Mike Mott BASTARD CONFESSION: Confessions Of A Bastard . .10 POLICIES Back Issues ADVICE: Ask that tool Britney married . 12 Back Issues can be ordered by sending $5.00 and a description of the issue desired (volume number and TOP TEN: Stuff that might happen . .12 date, if possible) to the address above. Some issues are no longer available. For a back issue please email [email protected]. Subscriptions Mail subscriptions are availible for $30.00 a year or $20.00 per semester. Email [email protected]. Postmaster please send address changes to 2301 Vanderbilt Place, VU# 351669, Nashville, TN 37235- Corrections: 1669. DISCLAIMER In our last issue, we mistakenly stated that actor and former James Bond, Sean Connery, This entire publication is a work of humor, parody and satire. You must be over 18 years old to read this was 81 years old, and thus starring in the publication. This publication and the content thereof does not always reflect the opinions of Vanderbilt upcoming “Octogenarianpussy.” It has come Student Communications, Inc. One copy of this publi- to our attention that Mr. Connery is in fact a cation is available free to members of the Vanderbilt community; additional copies are available for five dol- mere 74 years old, and the title of his film is lars each. If The Slant offends you, do not freakin' “Septagenarianpussy.” We apologize for this read it. Support our advertisers. inconvenience. Copyright © 2003, The Slant. All rights reserved Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances. 4 SLANTFEATURES The Slant - www.theslant.net - January 14, 2004 FROM THE EDITOR Over winter break, I had a lot of things to do. I won't go into this list of tasks; it would only bore you, the reader, who actually bothers to read my col- umn. However, I didn't accomplish as many of these things as I would have liked. Between television and online Scrabble (proper name: "Literati"), I could barely make sure I managed to brush my teeth. And goddamnit, I still cannot figure out how people who misspell "league" ("leege") can still beat me at Literati, but that's not my point.
Load more

Recommended publications
  • Does the Primetime Television Upfront Still Matter? by Steve Sternberg
    May 2019 #62 __________________________________________________________________________________________ _____ Does the Primetime Television Upfront Still Matter? By Steve Sternberg For American television viewers, the start of the new primetime television season is still four months away. For insiders at media agencies, networks, and advertisers, however, the Upfront season is placing thoughts of September squarely into May. Of course, the very idea of a fall TV season in today’s video world seems old fashioned. The broadcast networks might still adhere to fall and mid-season schedules for debuting new shows, but their competitors do not. Ad-supported cable networks premiere many new series when the broadcast nets are airing repeats and some limited-run series (mostly non-sweeps months and the summer). Premium cable networks, such as HBO, Showtime, and Starz, air new shows throughout the year. Streaming services, such as Netflix and Amazon Prime, release full seasons of new series whenever they happen to be ready. CBS All Access does as well, although it releases new episodes on a weekly schedule, rather than all at once. In a television landscape of 10-episode cable series, and streaming services where you can binge- watch entire seasons, viewers don’t necessarily think in terms of TV seasons anymore. Nevertheless, the broadcast networks still hold onto a schedule that starts in the fall. Throughout April and May, cable and broadcast networks give presentations to the ad industry in which they unveil their fall schedules and discuss
    [Show full text]
  • The Wooster Voice Febbuaby 6, 1S37
    The College of Wooster Open Works The oV ice: 1981-1990 "The oV ice" Student Newspaper Collection 2-6-1987 The oW oster Voice (Wooster, OH), 1987-02-06 Wooster Voice Editors Follow this and additional works at: https://openworks.wooster.edu/voice1981-1990 Recommended Citation Editors, Wooster Voice, "The oosW ter Voice (Wooster, OH), 1987-02-06" (1987). The Voice: 1981-1990. 146. https://openworks.wooster.edu/voice1981-1990/146 This Book is brought to you for free and open access by the "The oV ice" Student Newspaper Collection at Open Works, a service of The oC llege of Wooster Libraries. It has been accepted for inclusion in The oV ice: 1981-1990 by an authorized administrator of Open Works. For more information, please contact [email protected]. Tonight: "Daylight" At McGaw Tickets Still Available : it: v r -- VOICE ' ' ' ' 1: : .,: . - . .v . ... Sin..''" - :;;' VofatmeCm THE WOOSTER VOICE FEBBUABY 6, 1S37 . NcsberU ' ; GeDb to Address Colllege eagao's Foirengim ByDwridA-De- m EfiKr-tn-Cfai- et Tfas Wooter Voice (1969-197- Leslie H. Geltv an editor of 3) and Senior Associate of book on international relations, strategic and diplomatic matters over . with the Soviet Union and other and foxmer National Security the Carnegie Endowment for created by his having been Director many years has placed you in a American allies, and chairman of the Conespondent for the New York International Peace (1979-1981- ). of The Pentagon Papers" project in special position to provide informed ; executive branch committee that ran - multi-billio- Timet and will speak about . Aside bom his various the Department of Defense from comment and reliable- analysis, the n dollar US arms - "Reagan' Foreign Policy After fellowships Gelb-- served as an -- 1967-196- 9.
    [Show full text]
  • The Voice System of Amharic
    Faculty of Humanities, Social Sciences and Education The Voice system of Amharic Desalegn Belaynew Workneh A dissertation for the degree of Philosophiae Doctor - December 2019 The Voice System of Amharic Desalegn Belaynew Workneh A thesis submitted for the degree of Philosophiae Doctor UiT – The Arctic University of Norway Center for Advanced Study in Theoretical Linguistics (CASTL) December 2019 Abstract This dissertation examines the voice system of Amharic. I have studied the voice features including an anticausative and a pair of causative functional items focusing on their selection, interpretation and syntactic projection. The voice items display some interesting properties that made them worth an in­depth inves­ tigation. First, the single anticausative morpheme is associated with multiple constructions such as the passive, reciprocal, reflexive, middle and the like. This raises the foundational theoretical problem on the relation between form and meaning. Furthermore, the causative items display quite striking contrasts with the anticausative in selection. The direct causative item filters verb classes. The indirect causative does a similar filtering, but mostly on the types of external arguments. The anticausative, on the other hand, imposes little selection restriction on the verb and argument types. How the selection patterns are correlated with the interpretation and with the syntactic posi­ tion of the voice items is the main concern of this study. In this dissertation, I have proposed that all the crucial properties of the voice items, includ­ ing the observed distinctions in selection, projection and interpretation, can be explained by understanding the voice items two types–those that belong to both the syntactic and semantic domains, and those belong to the syntax only.
    [Show full text]
  • 6 Pm 6:30 7 Pm 7:30 8 Pm 8:30 9 Pm 9:30 10 Pm 10:30 11 Pm 11:30
    EC DT DN 6 PM 6:30 7 PM 7:30 8 PM 8:30 9 PM 9:30 10 PM 10:30 11 PM 11:30 2 - - WHWC PBS NewsHour (N) (HD) John Denver: Country Boy (TVG) Ma ’iingen: Brother Wolf Alone in the Wilderness Living in nature. Better Brain The Big The Big The Passage “Stay in the Light; Last Lesson” (Season Fox25/48 (:35) TMZ (N) (:05) Mike & (:35) Mike & (:05) Mom (:35) Mom 3 - 25 WEUX Bang Theory Bang Theory Finale) Amy must make a major decision. (TV14) (N) (HD) News at 9 (HD) Molly (TV14) Molly (TV14) (HD) (HD) FOX-48 - - - WCCO-4 News Wheel Neighbor Man-Plan Magnum P.I. (N) (HD) Bull “Jury Duty” (HD) News Late Show-Colbert Corden - - - WSTP-5 News News The Bachelor “2310A” (Live) (TV14) (N) (HD) The Good Doctor (TV14) (N) News (:35) Jimmy Kimmel Live Nightline (N) - - - WSAW-7 News 7 at 6 Inside Ed. Neighbor Man-Plan Magnum P.I. (N) (HD) Bull “Jury Duty” (HD) News 7 at 10 Late Show-Colbert Corden - - - KARE-11 News News The Voice The coaches seek America’s best voice. (N) The Enemy Within (HD) News Tonight Show-J. Fallon Seth Meyers 6 - - WKBTDT Pawn Stars Pawn Stars Law Order: CI Law Order: CI News 8 at 5 The Dr. Oz Show (HD) Dateline (TV14) (HD) Access (N) News 8 at Entertain- The Neigh- Man With a Magnum P.I. The Dober- Bull “Jury Duty” Bull finds News 8 at (:35) The Late Show With James 7 8 8 WKBT Six (HD) ment Tonight borhood (N) Plan (HD) mans dig up a human bone.
    [Show full text]
  • The Voice Magazine
    Relative Maturity Hidden Treasures New York City! VOL. 21, ISSUE 45 1 The Voice’s interactive Table of Contents allows you to click a story title to jump to an article. Clicking the bottom right corner of CONTENTS any page returns you here. Some ads and graphics are also links. Articles Relative Maturity .......................................................................................... 8 Voix du Maghreb: Kamal Benkirane, Partie I ............................................. 12 Columns Editorial: Hidden Treasures .......................................................................... 3 Writer's Toolbox: You Can Quote Me On That, Part I .................................. 5 From Where I Sit: New York City, Part II ...................................................... 4 Primal Numbers: When One Door Closes ................................................... 10 Mindful Bard: Hannah Arendt ...................................................................... 6 AUSU Update .............................................................................................. 16 News and Events Did You Know? .............................................................................................. 9 International News Desk ............................................................................ 11 Comics AntBoy and Happy Rabbit .......................................................................... 15 From Our Readers Letters to the Editor ..................................................................................... 2 2
    [Show full text]
  • Myers, Allison.Pdf
    FROM ALEICHEM TO ALLEN: THE JEWISH COMEDIAN IN POPULAR CULTURE by Allison Myers A thesis submitted to the Faculty of the University of Delaware in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Bachelor of Arts in English with Distinction. Spring 2010 Copyright 2010 Allison Myers All Rights Reserved FROM ALEICHEM TO ALLEN: THE JEWISH COMEDIAN IN POPULAR CULTURE by Allison Myers Approved: ______________________________________________________________________________________ Elaine Safer, Ph.D. Professor in charge of thesis on behalf of the Advisory Committee Approved: ______________________________________________________________________________________ Ben Yagoda, M.A. Committee member from the Department of English Approved: ______________________________________________________________________________________ John Montaño, Ph.D. Committee member from the Board of Senior Thesis Readers Approved: ______________________________________________________________________________________ Ismat Shah, Ph.D. Chair of the University Committee on Student and Faculty Honors ACKNOWLEDGMENTS I would like to express utmost gratitude to my thesis advisor, Elaine Safer, for all the guidance she has given and for all the jokes she has told me over the course of writing my thesis. I also extend my thanks to Ben Yagoda and John Montaño, my thesis committee, for guiding me in this process. It is because of University of Delaware’s incredible Undergraduate Research Program that I was able to pursue my interests and turn it into a body of work, so I owe the department, and specifically Meg Meiman, many thanks. Finally, I am grateful for every fellow researcher, family member and friend who has lent me a book, suggested a comedian, or just listened to me ramble on about the value of studying Jewish humor. iii TABLE OF CONTENTS Abstract .................................................................................................................................................................
    [Show full text]
  • The Voice for America's Libraries
    THEVOICE for America’s Libraries ISSN 1084-4694 VOLUME 21, ISSUE 1 January 2020 United for Libraries Monthly Member Forums Advocates of All Ages: Recruiting honors in 2016. Emily Younger Trustees and Friends completed her MSLIS Madeline Jarvis is the while serving as Catho- Adult and Information lic University’s associate Services Manager at director of communica- IN THIS ISSUE the Marion (IA) Public tions. Previously, she Library. She and her was a senior associate President’s Message 2 team cultivate collec- with The Pew Chari- Emily Wagner News & Notes 3 tions, services, and table Trusts. Around ALA 4 partnerships to serve Madeline Jarvis the Marion community. National Library Week: “Find Your Framework for Foundations 6 She is passionate about identifying and Place at the Library” Tools for Trustees 8 eliminating barriers to resources for Staff from ALA’s Communication & Focus on Friends 10 her patrons; helping the library serve as Marketing Office coordinate National a catalyst for community development; Library Week, an annual celebration Friends on Campus 14 and finding the perfect slice of pizza. highlighting the valuable role libraries, State Friends Spotlight 15 librarians, and library workers play in Good Ideas from the Network 16 Tess Wilson is the Com- transforming lives and strengthening munity Engagement our communities. Corporate Sponsors & Board of Directors 23 Coordinator for the Books for Babies 24 National Network of The E’s of Libraries®: Education, Libraries of Medicine, Employment, Entrepreneurship, Middle Atlantic Region. Empowerment, and Engagement She earned a BA in PLA CONFERENCE Wed., April 8, 2 p.m. Eastern English from Washburn Tess Wilson Learn about sessions for Trustees, University, an MFA in Alan Fishel is a partner Friends, and Foundations at the creative writing from Chatham Univer- at the law firm of Ar- upcoming Public Library Association sity, and an MA in library and infor- ent Fox and leads the Conference in Nashville.
    [Show full text]
  • Seinfeld, Jerry
    Jerry Seinfeld created The Seinfeld Chronicles with Larry David in 1988 for NBC. The show was later renamed Seinfeld . By its fourth season, it had become the most popular and successful sitcom on American television. The final episode aired in 1998, and the show has been a popular syndicated re-run. After he ended his sitcom, Seinfeld returned to New York City to make a comeback with his stand-up comedy rather than stay in Los Angeles and continue his acting career. In 1998 he went on tour and recorded a comedy special, titled I'm Telling You for the Last Time . The process of developing and performing new material at clubs around the world was chronicled in a 2002 documentary, Comedian , which also featured fellow comic Orny Adams and was directed by Christian Charles. On February 25, 2007, Seinfeld appeared at the 79th Academy Awards as the presenter for "Best Documentary." Before announcing the nominations, he did a short stand-up comedy routine about the unspoken agreement between movie theater owners and movie patrons. On October 4, 2007, Seinfeld made a brief return to NBC, guest- starring as himself in the 30 Rock episode "SeinfeldVision." On February 24, 2008, at the 80th Academy Awards, Seinfeld appeared as the voice of his Bee Movie animated character Barry, presenting "Best Animated Short." Before announcing the nominees, he showed a montage of film clips featuring bees, saying that they were some of his early work (as Barry). In 2012 Seinfeld started a Web series, Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee , in which he would pick up a fellow comedian in a different car each episode and take them out for coffee and conversation.
    [Show full text]
  • CASTLE ROCK ENTERTAINMENT, INC. V. CAROL PUBLISHING GROUP, INC. by Elisa Vitanza
    COPYRIGHT: DERIVATIVE WORKS: POPULAR CULTURE DERIVATIVES CASTLE ROCK ENTERTAINMENT, INC. V. CAROL PUBLISHING GROUP, INC. By Elisa Vitanza 1. INTRODUCTION Society benefits from the creation and dissemination of new, creative works. The Federal copyright system serves primarily to enhance the pub- lic interest through the promotion of creativity.' Copyright laws struggle to strike a balance between granting exclusive property rights and en- hancing the public domain so that the next generation of artists can use pre-existing works to generate more creativity. 2 The Copyright Act 3 pro- vides authors with incentives to create and share their creativity with the public through the grant of exclusive rights, including the right to prepare derivative works.4 Derivative artists also require incentives to invest in © 1999 Berkeley Technology Law Journal & Berkeley Center for Law and Technology. 1. See U.S. CONST. art. I, § 8, cl. 8 (providing that "Congress shall have Power... To Promote the Progress of Science and useful Arts, by securing for limited Times to Authors and Inventors the exclusive Right to their respective Writings and Discoveries") (emphasis added). 2. See Landes & Posner, An Economic Analysis of Copyright, 18 J.LEGAL STUD. 325-33, 344-46 (1989). Landes and Posner argue that copyright protection attempts to efficiently balance the benefits of creating new works with the losses from limiting ac- cess and the costs of administering copyright protection. Id. The economic theory of copyright is the dominant theory in the United States. However, commentators, particu- larly outside the United States, rely on moral or personal rights theories to justify copy- right protection.
    [Show full text]
  • Television Academy Awards
    2018 Primetime Emmy® Awards Nominees Per Program The Accidental Wolf OUTSTANDING ACTRESS IN A SHORT FORM COMEDY OR DRAMA SERIES Adventure Time OUTSTANDING SHORT FORM ANIMATED PROGRAM aka Wyatt Cenac OUTSTANDING SHORT FORM COMEDY OR DRAMA SERIES Alexa & Katie OUTSTANDING CHILDREN'S PROGRAM Alexa Loses Her Voice OUTSTANDING COMMERCIAL Alias Grace OUTSTANDING MUSIC COMPOSITION FOR A LIMITED SERIES, MOVIE OR SPECIAL (ORIGINAL DRAMATIC SCORE) The Alienist OUTSTANDING PRODUCTION DESIGN FOR A NARRATIVE PERIOD OR FANTASY PROGRAM (ONE HOUR OR MORE) OUTSTANDING CINEMATOGRAPHY FOR A LIMITED SERIES OR MOVIE OUTSTANDING PERIOD COSTUMES OUTSTANDING MAIN TITLE DESIGN OUTSTANDING LIMITED SERIES OUTSTANDING SPECIAL VISUAL EFFECTS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE Altered Carbon OUTSTANDING MAIN TITLE DESIGN OUTSTANDING SPECIAL VISUAL EFFECTS The Amazing Race OUTSTANDING CINEMATOGRAPHY FOR A REALITY PROGRAM OUTSTANDING DIRECTING FOR A REALITY PROGRAM OUTSTANDING PICTURE EDITING FOR A STRUCTURED OR COMPETITION REALITY PROGRAM OUTSTANDING REALITY-COMPETITION PROGRAM America's Got Talent OUTSTANDING LIGHTING DESIGN/LIGHTING DIRECTION FOR A VARIETY SERIES American Dad! OUTSTANDING CHARACTER VOICE-OVER PERFORMANCE American Horror Story: Cult OUTSTANDING PRODUCTION DESIGN FOR A NARRATIVE CONTEMPORARY PROGRAM (ONE HOUR OR MORE) OUTSTANDING HAIRSTYLING FOR A LIMITED SERIES OR MOVIE OUTSTANDING MAKEUP FOR A LIMITED SERIES OR MOVIE (NON-PROSTHETIC) OUTSTANDING PROSTHETIC MAKEUP FOR A SERIES, LIMITED SERIES, MOVIE OR SPECIAL OUTSTANDING LEAD ACTRESS IN A LIMITED SERIES OR MOVIE
    [Show full text]
  • Letters from a Nut Release
    Media Contact: Ashley Bodul, Geffen Playhouse [email protected] 310.208.6500 Ext. 159 FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE GEFFEN PLAYHOUSE BRINGS BESTSELLING BOOK SERIES “LETTERS FROM A NUT” BY TED L. NANCY TO THE STAGE A SPOTLIGHT ENTERTAINMENT SERIES PRODUCTION WRITTEN BY AND STARRING AUTHOR TED L. NANCY AND DIRECTED BY PIERRE BALLOÓN; JERRY SEINFELD PRODUCES PREVIEWS BEGIN JUNE 23, OPENING NIGHT IS JUNE 28 LOS ANGELES (March 23, 2017) – Letters from a Nut by Ted L. Nancy, a brand-new show based on the bestselling book series of prank letters and their responses from Ted L. Nancy (aka Barry Marder), will debut in June at the Geffen Playhouse as part of the theater’s Spotlight Entertainment Series. The show is produced by Jerry Seinfeld, and written by Nancy, who will star alongside Beth Kennedy and Sam Kwasman. Pierre Balloón will direct. Letters from a Nut by Ted L. Nancy will begin previews in the Audrey Skirball Kenis Theater at the Geffen Playhouse on Friday, June 23, with opening night set for Wednesday, June 28. Closing performance is Sunday, July 30. Ted L. Nancy is a customer in need of service. He writes to the city of Huntington Beach requesting a permit for operating his Electronic Nose Blowing Machine, invites Czechoslovakian President Václav Havel to become Treasurer of Ted’s Vacuum Club, asks Nordstrom about buying a mannequin that looks like his deceased neighbor to present to the grieving widow, and more. Time after time, well-meaning representatives offer earnest replies to his letters. Nancy brings his madcap collection of correspondence to the Geffen stage for a one-of-a-kind show that is both outlandish and uproarious.
    [Show full text]
  • Masaryk University Faculty of Arts
    Masaryk University Faculty of Arts Department of English and American Studies English Language and Literature Šárka Tripesová The Anatomy of Humour in the Situation Comedy Seinfeld Bachelor‟s Diploma Thesis Supervisor: Mgr. Pavel Drábek, Ph.D. 2010 I declare that I have worked on this thesis independently, using only the primary and secondary sources listed in the bibliography. …………………………………………….. Šárka Tripesová ii Acknowledgement I would like to thank Mgr. Pavel Drábek, Ph.D. for the invaluable guidance he provided me as a supervisor. Also, my special thanks go to my boyfriend and friends for their helpful discussions and to my family for their support. iii Table of Contents 1 INTRODUCTION 1 2 SEINFELD AS A SITUATION COMEDY 3 2.1 SEINFELD SERIES: THE REALITY AND THE SHOW 3 2.2 SITUATION COMEDY 6 2.3 THE PROCESS OF CREATING A SEINFELD EPISODE 8 2.4 METATHEATRICAL APPROACH 9 2.5 THE DEPICTION OF CHARACTERS 10 3 THE TECHNIQUES OF HUMOUR DELIVERY 12 3.1 VERBAL TECHNIQUES 12 3.1.1 DIALOGUES 12 3.1.2 MONOLOGUES 17 3.2 NON-VERBAL TECHNIQUES 20 3.2.1 PHYSICAL COMEDY AND PANTOMIMIC FEATURES 20 3.2.2 MONTAGE 24 3.3 COMBINED TECHNIQUES 27 3.3.1 GAG 27 4 THE METHODS CAUSING COMICAL EFFECT 30 4.1 SEINFELD LANGUAGE 30 4.2 METAPHORICAL EXPRESSION 32 4.3 THE TWIST OF PERSPECTIVE 35 4.4 CONTRAST 40 iv 4.5 EXAGGERATION AND CARICATURE 43 4.6 STAND-UP 47 4.7 RUNNING GAG 49 4.8 RIDICULE AND SELF-RIDICULE 50 5 CONCLUSION 59 6 SUMMARY 60 7 SHRNUTÍ 61 8 PRIMARY SOURCES 62 9 REFERENCES 70 v 1 Introduction Everyone as a member of society experiences everyday routine and recurring events.
    [Show full text]