Theologicai Perspectives on Homosexuality in Contemporary Orthodox Thought by Rabbi Nathaniel Helfgot

TheologicaI Perspectives on Homosexuality in Contemporary Orthodox Thought by Rabbi Nathaniel Helfgot A. Introduction The sexual revolution that burst onto the scene in the Western world more than a half century ago transformed the basic assumptions and mores of societies that had been rooted for centuries in legal and moral attitudes based on the Judeo-Christian worldview (more Christian, of course, than Judaic). The core values of traditional societies stemmed from biblical interpretations in a range of religious traditions as mediated by law and the social attitudes of the modern nation state. For example, in the United States sixty years ago, divorce was highly disesteemed, with many formal legal obstacles to its use in place. Abortion was illegal in every state. Living as a couple without marital commitment was stigmatized, as was having children out of wedlock. For homosexuals, core values shaped law in even more repressive ways. Homosexual congress was a crime that was regularly prosecuted, and revelation of one's homosexuality could end one's career and lead to discrimination in housing, employment, health care and other areas of civic life without any legal recourse. Such treatment was not only legal but considered appropriate in dealing with "deviants" and "perverts," as gay people were referred to in common parlance. Homosexuality was still considered a mental illness by leading mental health organizations, and people lived their entire lives “in the closet" so as to avoid the professional and personal repercussions of even rumors of homosexuality. 1 Sixty years later, in one of the most startling and swift cultural, societal, and legal shifts that any society has experienced, the entire classic traditional moral underpinnings of Western society have been turned on their head. Abortion, at least at some stages of pregnancy, was legalized decades ago throughout many Western countries, divorce is rampant and accessible, and living together before marriage or having children without marriage are common practices, largely devoid of stigma. Perhaps most startling, sixty years on, not only is homosexuality no longer considered a mental illness, but it is celebrated and depicted in popular culture and throughout large swaths of society as a fully legitimate and alternative life to traditional heterosexual family life. On the legal front, not only is homosexual congress no longer a criminal offense, but gay marriage is now legal throughout the United States and other Western countries, a development that would have been unthinkable barely a decade ago. This swift and total transformation in the legal and cultural landscape has, as with any cultural and legal shift in moral sensibilities, brought many of these issues to the forefront of the American Orthodox community that lives, works and breathes the air of modern society and has been fully integrated into it for the last half century as native, fully American citizens. As members of the gay community began "coming out" and the stigmas dissipated in general society, Orthodox circles began to see similar movement in these directions. In the last two decades, parallel to general society, the walls of silence and denial fell, and yeshiva high school graduates in college and beyond began coming out to their parents and communities. Now we have reached the point that kids come out in yeshiva high school if not earlier. Numerous support groups and organizations that advocate for gay Orthodox teens, adults and parents of Orthodox gay people have arisen throughout the United States, Europe and Israel. At the same time, as the pace of change has accelerated, Orthodox poskim, thinkers, communal rabbis and communal activists have addressed the growing reality of openly gay members of the community. Symposia, lectures, panels at rabbinic and educational conferences, articles and entire volumes have been written addressing various aspects of this phenomenon in the last two decades. Most of these writings and pronouncements have generally considered broad questions of halakhic and 2 communal policy, such as the level of inclusivity that Orthodox shuls, schools, camps and families should manifest to those who identify as gay, with various nuances depending on the level of non-halakhic behavior in which the person engages. Questions that have been addressed include whether someone who identifies as gay or has same-sex relationships can receive ritual honors in the synagogue, whether they be members in good standing of a community, whether one encourages psychological counseling (of various forms) to these individuals, whether people be encouraged to come out in their communities or remain closeted, whether gay people be encouraged to marry those of the opposite gender in the hopes that heterosexuality will "work out" for them or whether they should be vigorously discouraged from doing so. These and myriad other personal and communal questions – regarding hosting gay support groups for Shabbatonim or allowing gay youth to march at the Israel Day Parade -- have dominated the communal discourse and the various statements, writings, responsa and public declarations of the community. A sizeable portion of the relevant writing has justifiably focused on the pastoral dimensions of this cultural shift, asking how families and friends should react to or engage with those family members who identify as gay. Less systematic thought and writing, however, has been devoted to the theological and philosophical dimensions that many people, whether gay or not, struggle with in reconciling the reality of the existence of good, loving, ethical gay people -- themselves, friends, or relatives -- and the explicit biblical and rabbinic opprobrium directed at homosexuality. Such attempts at reconciliation necessarily interrogate the "fairness," justice, eternity and inerrancy of God's word as interpreted in halakha. As one educator puts it:1 This may surprise many adults, but the reconciliation of the Torah’s discussion of homosexuality represents the single most formidable religious challenge for our young people today. More young people are “coming out” than ever before, and that repeatedly puts a face to this theological challenge… As they go off to college, students invariably face the painful moral dilemma created by the seemingly intractable conflict: believing in the primacy and validity of the Torah on the one hand, and following their hearts’ sense of morality with regard to loving and accepting their gay friends – or perhaps “coming out” themselves—on the other. All too often, this earnest challenge results in our children quietly losing faith in the Torah as a moral way of life. 1 See https://shalhevetboilingpoint.com/opinion/2016/09/14/the-biggest-challenge-to-emunah-of-our-time/ 3 In other words, this theological challenge does not feel like a marginal or distanced point for many young people today but as the central challenge to their belief system. At first blush, a reflective individual familiar with classical Jewish and general religious thought may be tempted to question the uniqueness of this issue. Shouldn't considerations of homosexuality simply be part of the general (and eternal) question of theodicy: the existence of suffering in a world created by a just and loving God? On one level, such parallels hold true. However, on a sociological level, this issue (together with women's exclusion from certain religious roles) seems to bring greater pain and questioning to religious people (especially young people) in contemporary society than does the existence of suffering in general. This may have to do with the fact that evil caused by human beings, "allowed by God" so to speak, seems to be more intelligible as classical religious thought views God as created human beings with free will and autonomy, whose use may result in a negative and harmful impact on other human beings. The suffering caused by natural disasters or illness seem to many to be more philosophically troubling as they are part of the inherent nature of the world and fully in God’s control and God’s “fault” and responsibility. The fact that God would create human beings with same-sex attractions and then via the law, His word, shut them out from any ability to have meaningful intimacy seems to many people to be especially troubling. For many individuals, intellectual accommodation of this legal phenomenon challenges the conception of a commanding God who is merciful and righteous. This ethical and theological discomfort may be exacerbated by the sociological reality of living in a culture that is deeply rooted in human rights and freedom as the ultimate yardsticks of morality. This paper aims to address this tension by mapping the major Orthodox theological approaches to this question, both explicit and implicit, in the various statements and pronouncements that have emerged during the last 30 years. Through this exploration, I will address the cogency of each view and whether it provides satisfactory approaches to outlining a theological structure that can work on an intellectual, ethical, and emotional level for the Modern-Orthodox Jew struggling with cognitive dissonance when considering these issues. After delineating these various perspectives, I will outline what appears to me the most compelling 4 perspective in addressing this dilemma theologically and what I believe stands the best chance of resonating within a Modern-Orthodox high school setting. Today’s reality unfortunately includes significant pain, ambivalence, anger and alienation among many of our sons and daughters (both gay and straight). Some are leaving our community and the world of shmirat hamitzvot entirely because of the challenges outlined above. This paper is an attempt to address that reality and these caring young people’s questions in as intellectually inclusive a way as possible within the framework of traditional Jewish categories. It is my hope that having theological categories to work with will help our students to remain within the community, even as they continue to grapple with these and other theological questions.

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