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"

HAVE A VERY MERRY XMAS ...

.. . W HltE

IT LASTS

VOL.45

NO.3

DECEMBER

STAFF

1961

EST. 1919

SENIOR

BOARD

Whoopgaroo:

y

General Manager Managing Editor
-

AI Cameron

Marsh Green span

Stan Rosenblum Karl Genti Ii

-

Frank Ansuini

Editors

-

Greg Gabbard Bob Hirschfeld

oo

Norm White

Business

Manager

-

Bob Jahncke

Office Cat

Art Consultant

-

Paul Rubinstein
Phos

Kittens

Irving Beth

JUNIOR

BOARD

Stu Rooney

Sales Manager

-

D

oo

"S.P."

Paul Wehrenberg Steve Zilles
Shei la Nadine McG.

Make-up Editor

-

Treasurer Circulation Publicity Features Literary
-

Art Samburg

Manager Ted Graham Manager Pete Angevine
-

Jeanne

-
Editor Editor
-

Eric Hoffman Solon

-

Ad Manager

-

Cary Mock Chez Dorr

Art Editor

-

Literary

Staff

Office Manager Governmental
-

Arnie Falick
Jim Bradley Bob Gray
Steve Benton
Marshall Brown Marty Shemers Phil Issy Roger Hoan Ovid

Rep.

-

Exchange

Editor

-

Ph otography Editor

-

Joke Editor - B.E.D. Procurer Chaplain
-

G.T. Vesper Vince Lysol
Shei la Sennett Sue Press

-

Sacher Ma soch Mike Levine Ed Gershuny

John Navas Scott Hynek Lou Poulo Lou Frasco Hugh McCollum Rog Pari s Tom Palmer Hank Newell Phi I Smith Gary Rose Bi II Kassen Terry Chinn Bob Ti Ian Pete Lewis Lou Dardi
John Pryke Peter Gozi nya
John Mi Iler

Sales Staff

Gen. Gentilli Snow White Stan Sue Shazam
Jim Kotanchik Gary Feurer Ted Huguenin John Meyn Di ck K i rpatri ck Norma Rogers Lydia Wereminski Bi II Hoffman Jim Scholmer Jim Monk Bruce Crocker Tom Thornbury Mike Parker Mike Robson Logan Donnell Tom Callahan Art McCray

Art

Wilma Katseff Marci a Katseff Jane Daniel

James W e i!

Maurice Scherer Linda Koiro Robert Edel son Gayle Thigpen Judi Lipton Dawna Betkens Betty Levin son Bobi Costa John Hann i

Stan De Rita

Mark Cohen Lucy Bowles

Treasury

Bob Blumberg Ken Olshansky Di ck Lowensohn Chari i e Gitomer George Boudaiee
Nei I Pappalardo

Features

Advertising

John Banzhaf Tom DeFazio Richard "Jungle" Jack E.C. Florey John Reed

Publ icity

Walt Mi Iler Don Smith Mike Levine
Mark Ain
Bruce Francone

Ri ck Armstrong Steve Fletcher Frank Jalenko Ri ck Gander
Dave DeWan John Proctor Bob Brady
Langer

Horack, wherever you are

Dave Manchester

All material submitted with a stamped, self-addressed carefu I consi derati on. We cannot acknowledge,
1961, by the VOO DOO Senior Board.
Office: 303 Walker Memorial, Cambridge 39, Massachusetts. envelope to the Literary nor can we guarantee the return of, un sol i cited manu scri pt s. Published by the Senior Board at the Massachusetts Institute of
Editor, at this office, will receive
Copyright

Technology.

Office hours:

4:30 to 5:30 p.m. Monday through Friday. VOO DOO is published monthly from October throuqh Mav. Thirty-five $2.80 for eight issues: $69.00 in Pago Pago. Published class mail at Cambridqe, Massachusetts. Represented for national advertising Inc., 530 Chrysler Bldg., 11 W. 42 St. New York 36, N.Y. cents per copy. Subscription

Dec. 15, 1961. Dec. copy inserted.

Entered as second-

by Don Spencer, College Magazines

dential area, (Allston), our man wondered what the com-
C h i valry is not dead in Boston. Yet. We were down at The Sevens the other night and we saw a demonstration
11# e mourn another milestone in the annals of infamy ..... the staff of one of

motion could be.

Peering

groggily out the window, he perceived a genuine Salvation Army band marching down his street. In no mood for salvation, he put a Dukes of Dixie land on his stereo

the .best College

Humor

that pro ved this.

may know, between
As you the magazines in this country, the Texas Ranger, has been summarily fired, for printing in its last issue, what the hours of 10 and midnight on Friday night the interior of

The Sevens resembles

an

system,

channels opened his windows. stal wart militarists turned full blast, up both
University

sidered of Texas con-
"dirty" word.
M.T.A. car at rus.h hour, exceptthat everyone's drinking. Through this en tangl ement of bibulous bodies a young maiden, ,with a cat mounted upon her shoulders, was attempting to 0 btain a clear and The broke a
Having suffered a fate almost as dire, VooDoo feels rank, stopped playing, and double-timed out of earshot.

that

it should raise its

voice in the clamor that will undoubtedly be raised by many other College Humor magazines, sadness and note with the passing of a passageway lack of success. with notable
Suddenly swinging group of humorists. one of the barten ders 0 b-

served her plight and came immediately to her aid, by

Progesterone, Testosterone, Combat your urge

shouting

out loudly

and

clearly, uMake way for the lady with the Cyoung cat')."

To live alone. They rush your blood And shake your bone A nd make you wallow In sweet cologne A nd clean your ears And dial your phone And sometimes giggle And sometimes groan. So clever is man,

HONEST CARR

Used John Dealer
Basement, Walker Memorial

A few months ago, an of-

ficial

memo from Ralph

Savers was circulated around R.L.E., to the effect that too much petty thievery was going on, and would everybody please make sure that their respective offices and labs were locked at all times. We were therefore very sur-

With his gadgets infernal; But he's still bossed around By his juices internal.

A nother sign of goo d cheer ... one of our -Senior

board

members

was a-

wakened

at the unearthly

prised

last week, as we

hour of 10 a.m. last Sunday morning, by the sound of hymns blaring forth from a walked through the first floor of building 26 to observe that

somebody

took

the 709

trumpet.

Living in a resi-

,

Computerl/(See for yourself!)
2

1/# e were not

shocked at the recent furor over the Boston Police, and

at all

The SPCA has finally

persuaded the city of Boston to provide maternity for the numerous shelters their illegal doings .... we've known all that for years. The really funny part is the stray cats

and dogs which infest

our_

enclo,

fair streets.

These

sanctimonious puffing trying huffing being done locally. to show that the

and

sures,

beasts in which are permitted the poor to have their offspring are, it is true,
Boston Police really corrupt.
Force is not A prominent

open to the foul weather,

but

they are at least stuffed with nice warm scrap paper. You may have noticed them here and th ere on the street; th ey

religious

man even took it

upon himself assembled

to lecture

an

group of policemen on how badly is being maligned."

I

~Boston Hoodah! are marked. He re."
ClDrop Litter

s~i:;t,

Famous N.E. Maker

S-M-L-XL

1/#e don't know how much stock to put in this report. but we hear that Dean Petri

SWEATERS

I t is a known fact that
-all M.1. T. students, as they

Colorful, Washable

7 9 9

OrIon made by a

_

walk down any corridor, look in and inspect each secretary

is actually

giving loans to

studen ts so they can buy in every office.

they know that every secretary
Little each do and

(fine

art) prin ts from the

in building 14. To

gallery

is peering

every
There is a certain office in the Institute which is blessed with two doors. In this office many games have been played in the past two years. As matter of fact, the most poputhink ... they said MIT had no culture!

out

and

inspecting

little Tech Tool!
1/#e wish to congratulate

a certain G.P., Professor

of

Music, upon his recei ving an award from High Fiddidely

Magazine .... it seems

that

ahe has done more than any

other single person to perk up the ebbing record industry lar is for each secretary pick out the wierdest to
Tool

by causing

the early demise

who walks by and inform the of MIT's record collection.

other

before he walks

by

If you want an example, come

the

other door. TOOLS

to his lectures;

bring your lunch. but don't

BEWARE!

Harvar~

==B azar

Central Sq. - Comb.

Just a half-mile down the Ave.

I.ET":!. G r 0 e.s=."" U P

Itt.e ""I N e:
M

3
The cold, white snow had ceased falling. seemingly limitless white plain stretched out in all directions from the long rows of factory buildings which, silent now, had hummed incessantly all year long for this one night's effort, this night's effort which would bring joy throughout the world the next morning to millions of
Abear the strange ringing sound inside his head.

All the others were asleep now, they were far too exhausted from the yearly effort to see the takeoff; besides, they had seen it countless times before. Their job Was done. The cargo stood neatly stacked in almost endless lines on the snow. Each trip back would see those lines diminish until, with the rising sun, they would be no more. little children. golden hand rail of the great sleigh in order to steady himself. He felt dizzy, he heard strange ringing sound in his head and his
S.N. leaned heavily against the
S.N. picked up the reins. The deer, who up a

until this point had been restlessly

pawing the

stomach seemed to have a mind of its own, yet he climbed into the driver's seat as he had done earth, snapped to attention; this was the job
. they had awaited all year, their raison d'etre. S.N. gave t-he reins a slight snap and the sleigh rose effortlessly into the sky. Suddenly he felt

countless

times before; the show must go on.

His wife had begged him to let one of the helpers take his place, there were so many who could do the job. But S.N. knew better. It was his job, his alone, and no fall down a flight of steel factory steps was going to keep him from

at ease.

This was his job, his joy, and this

He permitted

year would be better than ever.

himself a full belly-laugh of joy . Why, the sleigh was even rising faster than ever before. Yes, this would be a banner year.

seeing that it was done right.

He knew the

entire route better than anyone else, its pitfalls and its shortcuts, the tricks and turns.
A few hours before takeoff time he had been in such pain, a kind of pressure beneath spot on his head marked by the clean white bandage,
Stop 3,243,247 was at the Littig home. This was an easy stop for S.N.: only one customer, Conrad, age 7. Standing next to the tree he paused with the electric train set still half way out of the bag to picture Conrad's high screams of delight the next morning. He chuckled softly to himself so as not to awaken his customer, who had fallen asleep in a peeping position just inside the doorway to the dining room. Yes, the trains, the tractor, the model airplane, the that he. almostconsent~d
. helpers make ,the trip. to let one of the
But miraculously the
. sharp barb of pain had departed, and despite her pleas he had supervised the loading and hitch
.ing.~.c:h~cklin:~. all the time as though he couldn't

4car with the remote control, and the funny puppet with the face of a duck, all these would not fail to amuse and delight him.

at the other end of the line.

He would have

preferred not to be here at all. To-day was a day when a man should be home with his family. He closed his eyes and waited for the screaming in the background to stop so he could hear what the woman was trying to tell him. It didn'fstop, it went on and on, a high pitched scream that he, as a father, had heard many times before. Someone was throwing a tantrum.

And he had earned it too.

For weeks he

been practically a little angel, perfect to the point of making his mother nearly burst with pride when she saw him clean up the playroom without being told, eat the spinach he hated so

passionately,

and offer his favorite toy to the

Suddenly he heard a sharp crack and the

boy next door.

scream diminished to a whisper. finally hear the almost hysterical voice of the woman at the other end of the line. She was obviously in tears: "For months we saved,

Now he could

S.N. took a last look at the warm, angelic-

looking creature sleeping peacefully, half-in, half-out of the dining room doorway, and rose

through the soot. Usually the trip up was

a

little each week since last June! He took it all, not a trace left! Everything, everything, over forty dollars in toys, from our own living room without a trace!. .. " easier, but tonight he rose slowly in accompaniment to the dull throbbing which had begun again in his head. Then throwing the bag into the back of the sleigh he mounted the driver's

seat, took the reins, and moved on to the next

Sergeant Brady was not surprised, how could

house down the block. slowly than before.

The sleigh rose more

he be surprised?

theft reported in New York in one day.
~t was the 3,243,247th such
- Solon
Sergeant Brady could hardly hear the VOIce

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5

There he lay, sprawled in a pool of crimson, his face a contorted expression of paralyzed fear. Mintomoni, the famed cond uctor, had obviously met his demise by foul means, reasoned Hercules Poisson, for how else might a violin bow have lodged itself between the ninth ribs of the silent figure? Ah, yes, thought Hercules aloud, this was no suicide ... an inordinately appropriate way for a musician to go .. .it must have taken years of planning.