The Family Stone

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The Family Stone Entertainment Editor Taylor McClure €nttrtatnment January 20th, 2006 Page 5 He Says, She Says: The Family Stone By Taylor McClure By Jenifer Farkas the family was gunning for her. But I am pretty sure this QIascoi Entertainment (Habcoi Entertainment Asst. Editor particular movie is a romantic Editor comedy. Romantic meaning chick flick which no guy What makes you feel better ten minutes would have been could ever understand or truly when you’re sitting in a musty enough. appreciate and comedy meaning living room with an assortment She Says: nonsensical humor which guys of people, ages ranging from 3 You can’t go wrong with are of course pros at. With to 93, listening to the old men a humorous distortion of that saidlmu.st admit the real talk about the weather in voices a New England Family, being issue in this movie, a family loud enough to overcome a New Englander myself; 1 dealing coping with the fact hearing loss? What makes was all over this movie like their mother is dying, seems you feel better then young kids white on rice. The Yankee a little out of place amongst running rampant with underwear humor might fly over the head the bickering and feuding. On on their heads screaming of slow southerners (Texans, the other hand this situation something about Santa bringing like McClure) but I will admit almost seems more real because one of them a fighter jet for , the story line does fly off the the family uses humor to get Christmas, besides booze? cuff. There is no way a girl through those “tough times.” How about a movie portraying as high maintenance as Sarah Romantic comedy also a family Christmas gathering Jessica Parker’s character will means “not for everyone,” in even wackier than yours? Enter fall for a grungy slob like her particular males. It is, however, The Family Stone. fiance’s brother, nor would a survivable if your date wants to The movie stars Claire sister lead on her future brother see it because there’s enough Danes {The Rainmaker and in law causing a romantic comedy to eclipse the sappy makes it a pretty good choice for We can agree that The Family bcit-ioops. What \vc cannot Brokedown Palace), Diane spark. Despite the poor story junk. However, girls tend to a Blockbuster (or NetFlix) night Stone is not spectacular but not settle, however, is which actrcss Keaton {Father of the Bride line you can’t deny that if Sarah like the sappy junk and that accompanied by a pint of ice abysmal, and therefore settle makes sticking around wortli and Something's Gotta Give), Jessica Parker were to show up mixed with the comic relief cream—Rocky Road of course. on four of seven polywool while. Rachel McAdams ''{Mean on screen with in the first ten Girls, Wedding Crashers, and minutes any guy would stay and Red Eye), Dermot Muhoney watch the entire movie. {My Best Friend’s Wedding, He says: Wedding Date, and Must Love I think you’ve got Rachel Dogs—this guy must have a McAdams or Claire Danes “chick flicks only clause in confused with the high Munich his contract), Craig T. Nelson maintenance mess Parker plays. the plot believable, and the char­ {Coach, The Skulls, and The It’s hard to be attracted to a self- By Taylor McClure acters complex and very well developed. The environment Incredibles), Sarah Jessica absorbed, OCD woman who CIIab«® Entertainment was also almost painfully real Parker {Sex and the City and constantly looks like her puppy Editor Honeymoon in Vegas), Luke was run over by a Mack truck, at times. For example, usually “The world was watching in Wilson {The Royal Tenenbaums on a mission fi"om the SPCA’s the sounds of guns in movies are 1972 as 11 Israeli athletes were and Old School), and the list Death Squad. Maybe if it was muffled enough so that watching murdered at the Munich Olym­ goes on. All parts are played Keira Knightley... Anyways, a movie in a theatre at regular pics. This is the story of what very convincingly even if her character isn’t all bad. volume doesn’t hurt the audi­ happened next.” You could dis­ the plot fails to support the After all, if you grow up in a ence’s ears. Spielberg changes miss the whole flick as another characters. dysflmctional family the girl/guy this, most noticeably during the Fahrenheit 9/11, a multimil­ He says: you bring home will probably first assassination when the shots lion dollar presentation of one I went to this one with be certifiable as well, so there are so loud and sharp it feels like man's political views that could absolutely zero idea about the is some element of realism. I the pistol is going off only a few be crammed into a five minute plot which is probably why I like the comedy generated feet away. Very rarely do people soimd bite. You could, but you agreed to go in the first place. by the family situr.tion. It’s get startled by something they would be missing a pretty good It would be nice if the world’s always nice to know that your know is coming, but if you’re movie. most messed up situations parents don’t epitomize flie not ready to hear those blasts at Eric Bana (Troy, Finding always came out tidy and idea of “embarrassing parent.” an almost realistic volume it will Nemo, and Black Hawk Down), clean with everyone happy, No matter how bad they are, catch you off guard and almost Daniel Craig (Road to Perdition but this is the real world and I’ve never heard of someone’s make you jump. and Lara Croft: Tomb Raider), the Commandant’s Staff still mother broadcasting their It’s a very long movie with Ciardn Hinds (Road to Perdi­ inspects my room. You can’t sexual resume to complete an extremely heavy plot and bring home a girl expecting strangers in real life like the tion and The Simi of All FearsX theme,' but, if you are in the Mathieu Kassovitz (Jakob the M,. u N I" to propose, fall in love with mom does in the movie. mood for this, a trip to Roanoke Liar and Birthday Girl), Hanns her sister, and have your pot- She says: or Staunton to catch a showing is Zischler, and Geoffrey Rush smoking brother come to the Parker’s character is well worth it. I give Munich 6 of rescue. Usually movies with nothing less than a confident, (Pirates of the Caribbean and 7 polywool belt loops, political Finding Nemo) star in this two any kind of love story tend to well organized, and stressed agenda or not. and a half hour feature. The act­ be slightly more than corny but out by the challenge of trying to ing was very well done. 1 had no I saw about half of this movie be accepted in a dysflmctional coming after only ten minutes. whacked out family. Before problem tracking and believing the character development. And had I had a ride home. she even set foot in the house The VMI Department of English and Fine Arts “[W]hat happened next” ac­ cording to the movie was Golda and Meir, the Israeli Prime Minister, The Timmins-Gentry Music Society ordered the assassination of 11 C a s a n o v a Palestinians spread out all over Europe. A Mossad agent named Present By Jenifer Farkas Anver, played by Bana, is asked to take on the position of team C abeoi Entertainment leader for this mission. Over the Asst. Editor course of roughly the next year, THE BALTIMORE CONSORT his five-man team takes out nu­ “I have always loved truth merous targets in a series of as­ so passionately that I have sassinations that hardly ever go often resorted to lying as a as planned. After the body count way of introducing it into the starts to tally up the himters be­ minds of which were ignorant come the hunted and a mixture of of its charms.” Words from the guilt, fear, and p^anoia destroys philosopher who devotes his life Anver’s psyche. to the perfection of experience, The movie is clearly about better known as Casanova. All the fear, guilt, and paranoia ac­ men envy him and all women companied by such a job and adore him. falls in love with Francesca a Cancionero! how it can destroy one’s view of The world’s greatest feminist writer played by Sienna the world. Many people believe Romances, Villancios and Improvisations lover is on the verge of being Miller {Joy-Rider, Alfie). Oliver Spielberg was going for more. imprisoned by the most feared Platt {Executive Decision, Another theme of the movie of 1 6 th-Century Spain Spanish Inquisitor who has Bicentennial Man, Bulworth) is that violence answered with arrived in Venice for the sole plays the fianc6 of Francesca violence breeds more violence. purpose of capturing and as the infamous lard salesman, Palestinians kill Israeli athletes; hanging Casanova. Fortimately Paprizzio, adding in a little bit Israelis kill Palestinians respon­ for Casanova he is warned by of humor to the romance. sible for the athlete’s deaths; his good friend and he must Although I will admit this is Palestinians kill more Israelis, either flee Venice or find a a complete chick flick from start and so on. legitimate bride. Unable to to finish, it wouldn’t be a bad You could argue that leave Venice due to a childhood movie to take your girlfnend Spielberg’s overall message is promise, Casanova chooses to to.
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