“Let Me Talk My Shit”: Exploring Raciocultural Trauma Through Embodied Arts
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University of Massachusetts Amherst ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst Doctoral Dissertations Dissertations and Theses July 2021 “LET ME TALK MY SHIT”: EXPLORING RACIOCULTURAL TRAUMA THROUGH EMBODIED ARTS Andrew Brian Torres University of Massachusetts Amherst Follow this and additional works at: https://scholarworks.umass.edu/dissertations_2 Part of the Art Education Commons, Language and Literacy Education Commons, and the Social Justice Commons Recommended Citation Torres, Andrew Brian, "“LET ME TALK MY SHIT”: EXPLORING RACIOCULTURAL TRAUMA THROUGH EMBODIED ARTS" (2021). Doctoral Dissertations. 2228. https://doi.org/10.7275/22469822.0 https://scholarworks.umass.edu/dissertations_2/2228 This Open Access Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by the Dissertations and Theses at ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst. It has been accepted for inclusion in Doctoral Dissertations by an authorized administrator of ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst. For more information, please contact [email protected]. “LET ME TALK MY SHIT”: EXPLORING RACIOCULTURAL TRAUMA THROUGH EMBODIED ARTS A Dissertation Presented by ANDREW B. TORRES Submitted to the Graduate School of the University of Massachusetts Amherst in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY May 2021 College of Education Social Justice Education © Copyright by Andrew B. Torres 2021 All Rights Reserved “Let me talk my shit”: Exploring Raciocultural Trauma through Embodied Arts A Dissertation Presented By ANDREW B. TORRES Approved as to style and content by: _________________________ Jamila Lyiscott, Chair _________________________ Keisha Green, Member _________________________ Laura Valdiviezo, Member ______________________________ Jennifer Randall Associate Dean of Academic Affairs College of Education DEDICATION This dissertation is dedicated to my Guela Carmen and Guela Maria; to the island of Boriken and her people around the world; to my community. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS First, I want to acknowledge God who gives me strength and purpose. Embarking on this journey came at a time when I felt that I was being pushed out of the classroom. The decision to even pursue a doctorate was compounded by the fact that I was on my way to getting married and starting a family. I want to acknowledge my wife who made the biggest sacrifices following me into the unknown and holding me down through it all. My daughter who has been my driving force in the darkest of times and reminds me of the purity of life; thank you for your unbiased love. To my family, my grandmother and mother, who pushed me when I wanted to give up and questioned whether this was meant for me; you have provided me with a fortified foundation that will withstand all the stresses of the world and overcome. To my grandfather and all the wisdom, you have imparted onto me; you are the father that taught me to be a man. I also want to acknowledge Magdalena who became my greatest mentor and the first person to ever call me a revolutionary. Lastly, I want to acknowledge my ancestors who have guided me through every instance when I felt like an imposter, and every time I was on the brink of losing myself showed me that I was exactly where I needed to be. v ABSTRACT ANDREW B. TORRES, B.A., SUNY BINGHAMTON UNIVERSITY M.S.Ed., UNIVERSITY OF PENNSYLVANIA Ph.D., UNIVERSITY OF MASSACHUSETTS AMHERST Directed by Assistant Professor Jamila Lyiscott This dissertation focuses on a qualitative study drawing on critical ethnography in conjunction with the self-reflective components of autoethnography, the critical race methodology of racial and counter-storytelling (Johnson, 2017; Solorzano & Yosso, 2002), and youth-centering components of Youth Participatory Action Research (YPAR) (Cammarota & Fine, 2010; Duncan-Andrade & Morrell, 2008; Torre et al., 2012). The purpose of this study was to explore the complex relationship between trauma, the lived realities of racially minoritized youth, and the arts. As theory-building research, this study sought to expand trauma theory toward raciocultural perspectives of trauma while expanding performance arts theory into an embodied understanding of performance arts. Moreover, this theory of trauma is based in the lived realities of racially minoritized youth as they live with and through trauma. In this way, trauma functions as a haunting for racially minoritized youth (Derrida, 2012; Gordon, 2008). Observations were conducted at a monthly open mic, L!t (pseudonym) that the researcher volunteered at for two years and hosted prior to gaining permission to conduct research. One cisgender woman and two queer women youth artists participated in the study, which consisted of 10 unstructured interviews held over the course of a year in the New England region of the United States. The participants and researcher identified as Puerto Rican, although one participant identified as bi-cultural and another participant identified as multi-cultural vi and were mentored by a Puerto Rican artist who was the founder of the monthly open mic, powerful community leader, and a member of the Nuyorican Literary Vanguard. Instead of focusing on pain narratives, this study focused on the various forms of power and wisdom that come from being haunted by traumatic experiences. Findings from this study reveal that participants use embodied arts as a means of therapy that is rooted in culturally sustaining practices. Participants also view performing embodied arts as a pathway toward disrupting the culture of silence around trauma that exists in their communities. vii TABLE OF CONTENTS Page ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ................................................................................................. v ABSTRACT ...................................................................................................................... vi CHAPTER 1 INTRODUCTION ................................................................................................. 1 2 LITERATURE REVIEW ...................................................................................... 8 Introduction ................................................................................................ 8 A Review of Trauma Theory/Studies ........................................................ 8 A Brief History of Trauma ............................................................. 8 Race-based Trauma ...................................................................... 11 Racial Trauma .............................................................................. 13 Cultural Trauma ........................................................................... 14 Complex Trauma ......................................................................... 15 Trauma in Media .......................................................................... 16 Trauma, Witnessing, and Testimony ........................................... 17 Haunting ................................................................................................... 20 Storytelling and Race ............................................................................... 22 Poetry and Youth ..................................................................................... 30 Toward Raciocultural Trauma, Embodied Arts, and Self-Actualization ............................................................................. 32 A Framework for Raciocultural Trauma.................................................. 33 A Framework for Embodied Arts ............................................................ 35 When the Dead Look Like You ............................................................... 37 Conclusion ............................................................................................... 39 3 METHODOLOGY AND RESEARCH APPROACH........................................ 41 Introduction .............................................................................................. 41 Rationale for Qualitative Research Design .............................................. 42 Rationale for Hybrid Ethnographic Methodology ................................... 44 Methodology ................................................................................ 44 Autoethnography.............................................................. 46 Critical Ethnography ........................................................ 49 Racial Storytelling as Method .......................................... 51 Youth Participatory Action Research (YPAR) ................ 54 viii The Research Collective .......................................................................... 56 Information Needed to Conduct the Study .............................................. 57 Literature Review..................................................................................... 58 Research Design....................................................................................... 60 Data Collection ............................................................................ 60 Participant Observations .................................................. 61 Unstructured Interviews ................................................... 62 Data Analysis ............................................................................... 63 Thematic Analysis ........................................................... 63 Open Coding .................................................................... 64 Focused Coding ............................................................... 64 Triangulation ...................................................................