U) NI66 IffiMSfWyy oef 0 7 20BS er Vol. XCIII, Issue No. 8 SINCE 1916 Friday, October 7, 2005 Committee considering minors by Amber Obermeyer Sept. 28 meeting. The committee to.' This way, people might stop once

THRESHKR EDITORIAL STAFF did not vote on that proposal either, they have a minor." instead asking Jones School Dean Psychology Professor Jim Pomer- A proposal from Dean of Under- William Glick to compile logistical antz, also a curriculum committee graduates Robin Forman calls for the information about the potential un- member, said having two or more establishment of academic minors. dergraduate business program. majors is sometimes appropriate. The University Standing Committee The proposal considered at "For some students, it's not a bad on the Undergraduate Curriculum Tuesday's meeting defines a minor thing to double and triple major, but discussed the proposal at its meet- as an interdisciplinary group of sue to for others, they're going for a cre- ing Tuesday. Curriculum committee eight courses and lists business, legal dential at the expense of breadth," chair Bill Wilson said committee studies, medical humanities, African Pomerantz said. members like the idea of minors but American studies, communication Registrar David Tenney, an ad- wanted a more detailed proposal to and leadership as examples. viser to the committee, is compiling be developed. President David Leebron said add- data on how many students have "Since there is interest in looking ing minors could give students more multiple majors. into it, we decided Dean Forman and I flexibility in choosing their courses. In the late 1980s and early 1990s, wou Id draft a concrete proposal of just "Minors allow students to get rec- Rice offered "coherent minors," a what the rules would be, send it out ognition in an area of concentration set of three or four courses, usually to the committee, and then get back without the burden of an additional from the same department, intended together and talk about it some more," major," Leebron said. to encourage students to study Wilson, an electrical and computer Wiess College sophomore John subjects outside their majors. Coher- engineering professor, said. Kehoe, one of three undergraduates ent minors included archaeology, Wilson said he wrote a first draft on the curriculum committee, said Lgal studies, modern Germany and and sent it to Forman Wednesday. he thinks students would benefit statistical science. If the committee approves a from minors. The curriculum committee will proposal for minors, that proposal "It would be good just in terms of probably meet again the week of Oct.

ADAM GINSBURG/THRESHER would then have to be approved by alleviating the pressure for double 17, Wilson said. the Faculty Senate, Forman said. majors," Kehoe said. "The feeling "We want to move quickly because Currently, Rice's only minor is in is that a lot of people think, 'Well, I the whole process is going to take Power forward Naval ROTC. have already taken this many history some time," he said. "We'd like to get Lovett College sophomore CaitllCaH n Robblns attempts to fake out a The curriculum committee sepa- classes, and if I take a couple more Marshall University defender In Rice's 2-0 win Sunday. this finalized so if we do it, minors are rately considered a proposal to adopt I'll finish the major, so I'll take those in the catalog next year." a business certificate or minor at its extra classes even though I don't want See MINORS, page 6 Mayor Bill White named 2006 commencement speaker

by David Brown officials," the article states. The announcement of this year's tion president, said Leebron discussed not have been very meaningful, but

THRESHER EDITORIAL STALE Murphy, a bioengineering graduate speaker comes two months earlier in the short list with the committee at least it's interesting," Meguac said. student, said White's leadership and the year than the 2004 announcement and advised them on which potential "Years later, you're not going to say, 'Oh, Mayor Bill White, who drew national his national reputation influenced the of Psychology lYofessor Mikki Hebl, speakers were most practical but let 1 had the mayor. I can't remember his recognition when Hurricane Katrina committee. who was the first Rice faculty memberto the committee decide. name though.'... A world figure would evacuees came to Houston and when "We were looking for someone who deliver a commencement address. Lastyear, thecommittee submitted a have been more interesting." Houston residents evacuated before was going to be newsworthy," Murphy After last year's controversial se- list of 10 names to Leebron, who made However, Jones senior Mark Pond Hurricane Rita, will speak at Rice's 93rd said. "White was kind of on the radar, lection, the speaker was chosen early the final selection. said he is pleased with the choice. Commencement this spring. White but with everything that happened with this year to ease students' concerns, Adviser to the President Maryana "I think having someone who's a was announced as the commencement Katrina, he really shot up the list" Murphy said. Iskander (Wiess *97) said names of local political figure is a good idea," speaker in a news release Tuesday. Murphy said committee members "We wanted to have the speaker potential speakers were concealed Pond said. White was selected by the Com- also liked White because he is uncontro- decided upon as early as possible so this year in order to avoid suggesting Wiess College senior Marc Burrell mencement Speaker Committee, com- versial and has widespread appeal. students wouldn't have to worry about the committee's preference for certain agreed. He said having White as com- posed of undergraduates James Lloyd "I think he was a good choice that it nor would those planning commence- potential speakers over others. mencement speaker is a good way to and Breck Garrett, graduate students everyone can be happy with because ment ceremonies," Murphy said. Garrett said he was pleased with the represent Houston and that having a Matthew Murphy and Sheila Moore, he is well respected both at Rice and The committee began by gathering process overall but that he thought the politician speak is not a problem. and chaired by Sociology Professor throughout Houston," Murphy said. opinions from the Classof2006through committee should have more under- "I doubt that people are going to Katherine Donato. Garrett a senior and Jones Col- an online survey. Most students said graduates than graduate students. look at the speech as a partisan event" President David Leebron, who lege president, said the committee they wanted a speaker from outside "A commencement speech is Burrell said. "Commencement is more served as an adviser to the committee, considered many potential speakers, Rice, and the most requested people something undergrads care a lot more about a progression than something said he thinks White is an excellent but that politicians were appealing be- were cyclist Lance Armstrong and about than graduate students," Garrett that follows political party lines." choice. cause they are less expensive to book actress Tara Reid, Garrett said. said. "In past years, there were three White, who is running for reelec- "Bill is an extraordinary person of than many celebrities. Rice does not Murphy said the committee com- undergrads and one grad. I don't tion in November, was elected mayor integrity and vision and has been a ter- have a maximum amount it is willing piled a long list based on students' really understand the switch [to two in a 2004 runoff election. He served as rific leaderofourcity," leebron said. "At to spend, but historically has not paid recommendations. undergiaduates and two graduate deputy secretary of energy for Presi- this particular point in time, he's clearly large honorariums for commencement "[After the survey,] each member students]." dent Bill Clinton from 1993r'95, and he a person with a national reputation speakers. thought moreaboutthecandidatesand Sid Richardson College senior was the Texas Democratic Partv chair —someonewho has really represented Among politicians disctissed, White asked other students for their input to Kathleen Keif said she was satisfied from 1995-*97. Houston well and has made a major was acceptable partly because he has get a feel of which candidates would be with the selection of White but would Before entering politics. White contribution to the city." moderate views, Garrett said. well accepted," Murphy said. have preferred an outsider. was an attorney and taught law at the AA'etv York Times article cited White "People would've definitely had Murphy said the committee nar- "It might be more fun for my com- University of Texas. as instrumental in Houston's reception concerns with a very liberal or very rowed the list to about 10 names. mencement guests to hear a speaker White has spoken at Rice twice this of Hurricane Katrina evacuees. conservative speaker," Garrett said. Garrett said the committee then met from outside of Houston," Keif said. semester. He gave a Sept 1 speech "Many credited the leadership of "We discussed candidates of both par- with President Leebron to discuss the Lovett College senior Yigit Menguc to the Young Democrats and made Mayor White ... who kept tight reins ties, and as long as the politician was candidates, but that the committee said having a famous speaker should be an appearance on a Sept. 21 Scientia on the relief effort through daily meet- a moderate, we didn't feel like it was a chose the speaker. Lloyd, a Brown the most important criterion. panel about preparations for Hur- ings of city, county, state and federal huge issue." College senior and Student Associa- "It seems like having Bill Cosby may ricane Rita. Esperanza to be held downtown INSIDE Midterm recess OPINION Page 3 by Anne Hierholzer Wiess College freshman Michelle Ge An atheist discovers Like wood believes the theme will make Esperanza an Have fun this weekend, whether you FOR THE TORF:SHER Page 8 event worth attending. are road-tripping to Big Bend or jetting to A&E Film probes violence, masculinity Mobsters and 1 lapix-rs will be all that jazz at the "The idea for a 1920s, flapper-style Es- the East Coast. All classes normally held Grand Room Event Center downtown Nov. 12. peranza sounds great," she said. "I'm really on Monday will meet Wednesday, and SPORTS Page 11 Esperanza — the traditionally girl-ask-guy looking forward to going and seeing how all Wednesday classes are canceled. Owls look to hook Pirates fall formal — is tentatively titled "A Gatsby the plans for it come to fruition." Quote of the Week Gala at the Grand Room." The dance will Wiesman said RPC chose to hire a disk No Thresher next week "I think it's a good compromise that addressed include a disc jockey and is scheduled for jockey because doing so is cheaper than The Thresher will also take time off tor [outstanding] issues, and it will be a better hiring a band and because students prefer 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. Midterm Recess, so we'll see you Oct. 21. representation of how we come to our deci- Tickets will be sold by Rice Program DJs to bands. sion."— Honor Council Chair John Horstman on Council representatives for $25each at lunch In past years, RFC has given out free the council's decision to include aggravating cir- before the event and for $30 at the door. glassware to guests, but this year RPC will Scoreboard cumstances in the Consensus Penalty Structure. RPC Formats Co-Chair Katy Wiesman said have a limited supply of glassware, which Football See story, page 4 the 1920s jazz theme was considered by a will be sold at the dance. Wiesman said. RPC Rice 25, UAB 46 Weekend Weather past formals chair but never used. is also considering giving out raffle tickets Soccer FHday "[A former chair] had always wanted to with each piece of glassware for drawings Rice 2, Marshall 0 Partly Cloudy, 57 77 degrees throughout the evening, Wiesman said. Rice 3, East Carolina 0 do a jazz theme, but never got around to it," Saturday Wiesman, a Sid Richardson College senior, The Grand Room is four blocks from the Volleyball Rice 1. UTEP 3 Sunny, 60-81 degrees said. "After she left, we discovered a manual Bell Street METRORail station, but RPC will Rice 3, Tulane 0 Sunday she'd left behind, describing her ideas for it, hire shuttles to take students to and from the Sunny, 63-82 degrees and we decided to run with it." event, Wiesman said. Bsff tifil

THE RICE THRESHER OPINION FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7.2QQ5

I'm majoring in English, but I have the Rice Thresher minors in nanophysics, temporal j| | thought you were going pre-med. philosophy and squirrel studies! —

n. < Minors: right problem, V&fl /

wrong solution : • The University Standing Committee on the Undergraduate Cur- riculum should categorically reject the proposal to allow more minors. (See story, page 1.) We do think a main justification for the proposal, students' certification obsession—adding purposeless second, third and fourth majors—is an authentic concern. But the solution is not adding minors; it is improving academic advising and making major curricula more satisfying to undergraduates. Minors, like any unnecessary certification, will pervert the supply certainly am! And my resume and demand for classes. Students will take classes in which they are not is already 10 pages long! interested in order to get an extra word on their transcripts or resumes. For the largest of these required classes, multiple sections and faculty will be needed, inevitably meaning some faculty will have to teach sections of i if- •• •: classes they also don't like. Meanwhile, faculty whodowantlargerclasses Rice might offer minors. Be afraid. Be very afraid will have the incentive to create a minor to attract students, potentially leading to frivolous programs. Thafs not our idea of a Rice education. Furthermore, although the minors proposal was made in part to allow LETTERS TO THE EDITOR students to get a broader education—to discourage them from collect- ing multiple majors and encourage them to distribute their classes more this debate rages, evolutionists are intellectual life and has to publish for widely across departments—minors would not solve the problem. The MAN A major will meticulously churning out yet more any professional advancement. And students who currently pursue three or four majors would simply take supporting research. Anti-evolu- all of us, I am sure, have experienced two majors and two minors, one major and five minors, or some similar not be eliminated tionists should do the same. The the greater understanding and in- scientific community eagerly awaits sight when we are forced to articulate combination. Breadth would still not be achieved. If anything, it would To the editor: your "results." our ideas in writing. Yet not all of us just be easier for students to attain meaningless resume appendages. The article on the proposed teach the writing that is as essential The real solution to rampant certification collection is more subtle business minor may have led to a Ryan McConnell to the discipline we profess as part than adding minors to the curriculum. Here are our ideas: misunderstanding ("Jones School, Jones '05 of the discipline itself. • Make academic advising a more visible and meaningful presence Economics propose business mi- Why do we withhold this from the nor" Sept. 30). There are no plans students? Because writing is hard to in undergraduate life, so students will be discouraged more loudly to eliminate the managerial studies Columnist misses the teach. Because it takes a lot of time. from pursuing majors for the sake of having more majors. Hire more major. On the contrary, the university Because we are rewarded for the Academic Advising staff and give incentives to faculty for becoming has spent considerable resources to action on campus papers we publish, not the papers divisional advisers so more will do so. Students should proactively seek enhance the major. Students inter- we grade. And because we have been advice from multiple professors across different departments — we ested in seeing the changes made to To the editor: kidding ourselves. the managerial studies major should Writing across the disciplines is think part of the problem is that many students go to their major adviser Like Apoorva Shah, I am begin- look at its Web site, http://www. ruf. ning to worry about my fellow Rice the wave of the past, and we at Rice only for advice on their major, and consider themselves "on their own" rice.edu/~mana, or talk with me. students ("Student rebellion needs have missed it. We don't need to over for their other classes, leading to unnecessary extra majors and other meaningful aspirations," Sept. 30). haul the writing exam — we need to poor choices. Stronger academic advising will stop the problem where Richard Boylan His attack on students, ending with alter the writing culture at Rice. it starts: misinformed and unchallenged student opinion. Managerial Studies director "Rice, get off your ass and do some- The Cain Project and the Hu- • Make individual majors more appealing to students seeking further Economics professor thing important," was, to me and manities Writing Workshop, the many others, an offensive and egotis- more recent attempt at freshman academic endeavors. For example, many majors allow students to develop tical diatribe — nothing more. seminars and a revitalization of the a specialization or concentration within that major. Political science does Respect in science is Where has he been that he has Humanities program have started this well—among other things, one can be "a political science major with missed the fiery political debates and some of us talking, but all of us have a concentration in international relations." We think other majors should earned, not given action on campus, whether it be a fight to enter this conversation in order to do the same. In addition, focusing on undergraduate research within for homosexual rights or a debate give it a center, some real visibility To the editor: over religion? At dinner, in common and muscle. majors would improve students' education more than adding minors. Last week, two students demand- rooms late at night, at organized And since nothing else has The intent behind the minor proposal is good, and the problems ed greater acceptance of diversity meetings, even at parties I find fasci- worked, maybe prayer and fasting it attempts to address are legitimate. We just think there is a solution in the evolution "debate" ("Dogma nating conversations on philosophy, would promote louder demands from wiser than one adding more certifications to an already certification- hinders diversity of thought" and literature, international politics, love the students. happy campus. "Columns liken religiosity to stupid- and calculus. One of the things 1 love ity," Sept. 30). Unfortunately for them, most about Rice is the nearly seamless Terrence Doody academic respect is earned. merging of intellectualism and classic- English professor A theory's arduous journey to college social life. The students here acceptance requires painstaking are as bright, receptive and well- Increase transparency of accumulation of evidence and ad- rounded a group as can be found just herence to the scientific method. about anywhere. Discoveries often face contem- If Shah is unhappy with the people CONTACTING THE grad speaker search poraneous ridicule; vindication with whom he has chosen to associ- THRESHER comes years later as supporting ate, he should expand his horizons. While we applaud President David Leebron for letting the Com- evidence mounts. If he dislikes the conversations, he mencement Speaker Committee make the final decision on the 2006 Esteemed academic institutions should initiate discussions about Letters speaker, room for improvement in the selection process remains. (See take pride in the rigorousness and topics he finds interesting and impor- m Letterstotheeditorshould story, page 1.) We are disappointed the decision was made in virtual openness with which they conduct tant. Shah is a part of this university. be sent tothe'/Ti resher by e-mail research. These earmarks of funda- to [email protected]. Letters secrecy. The Class of2006 brainstormed names for the committee last Accusing others of not living up to mentally sound science are lacking his standards and blaming others for must be received by 5 p.m. on spring, but then the committee lowered a shroud of almost complete in anti-evolution arguments. Such his own dissatisfaction will not help the Monday prior to a Friday silence until returning the final decision this week. arguments embarrass Rice because anyone's situation, particularly when publication date. We understand the concern that too much publicity about the selection they demand unearned respect for he broadcasts his indictments to the • All letters to the editor process may drive away potential speakers—no one wants to find out he an unfounded idea based on dubious en ti re u n i versity. H is accu sation s are must be signed and include "research." neither meaningful nor applicable. If college and year if the writer was not the first choice — and we also understand that more than 1,200 Jared Blakely bemoans evo- he continues to encourage change is a Rice student. graduating undergraduate and graduate students cannot collectively lutionists' "uneducated view of by belittling others, the change he • Letters should be no lon- make a decision. But a greater degree of input from all graduates-to-be dissenting opinions." I implore the wishes to see will not occur. ger than 250 words in length. is needed, because we all have high expectations for the speech. proponents of these dissenting The Thresher reserves the In the future, after soliciting first ideas from graduates-to-be early opinions — Blakely's so-called "re- Katina Mitchell right to edit letters for both spectable scientists" — to please Martel sophomore content and length. in the spring, the committee should go public later in the spring with educate us. Publish your theories, a short list of 20 names — unranked, to avoid hurting candidates' feel- backed by testable evidence, in peer- Subscribing ings and making them less likely to come to Rice. Then, all upcoming reviewed journals. Nature awaits your Rice's writing culture graduates should be able to vote preferentially on the candidates. The revolutionary ideas. Evolution has • Annual subscriptions are available for $50 domestic and results would not have to be made public but should be considered by dozens of specialized, peer-reviewed needs renaissance journals — where are yours? Ironi- $125 international via first the committee as they narrow 20 names down to 1. class mail. cally, Blakely criticizes a television To the editor: As for the selection of Mayor Bill White, we have mixed feelings. show for failing to refute creationism, Your editorial on the English Based on his previous appearances on campus, we sense that he is not a yet he neglects to include a single composition exam was the best edito- Advertising charismatic public speaker. But in many respects he is intriguing—he is example of evolutionary fallacy in rial the Thresher has ever published • We accept display and a former deputy U.S. secretary of energy, a politician with statewide and his own column. ('Time for overhaul of writing exam, classified advertisements. Ad possibly even bigger ambitions whose national prominence was greatly Science is not anti-God. Rather, curriculum," Sept. 16). And about vertisements must be received science does not explicitly require time, too, for the students to ask out by 5 p.m. on the Monday prior elevated in the aftermath of Hurricanes Katrina and Rita, and a person the divine as an immediate explana- loud about what they need and aren't to a Friday publication date. who knows and cares much more about Rice than Bill Cosby ever will. tion for natural phenomena. Rice's getting. But why an exam that has Please contact our advertising anti-evolutionists are entitled to their never worked and that you expect manager at (713)348-3967 or Unsigned editorials represent the majority opinion of the Thresher opinion, but they should realize they almost everyone to flunk? thresher-adsfirice. edu for more editorial staff. are challenging 150 years of mount- The faculty writes for a living. information. ing evidence to the contrary. While Every one of us writes as part of our THE RICE THRESHER OPINION FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005 Self-proclaimed gadfly Guest column Lakewood: All the fire without the brimstone I love Lakewood Church. Let me churches assume you know the songs bore a distinct resemblance to former Confessions of a creepy clarify: As a Jewish atheist, I love or make you read out of a musty old Rockets forward Matt Maloney. As I Lakewood Church. Many may hymnal, but Lakewood does it kara- saw it, his sermon consisted of three be quick to condemn our neigh- oke-style. Plus, they can put up little sections: Give money to lakewood guv: We're not that bad bors down U.S. Highway announcements if need be, Church, if you're good you will get 59 — the largest Protes- so I was able to learn that money and Joel is awesome. No sur- "Hi, my name is Andrew." "Hi of normal guys — can be spotted tant church in the world God is love and a blue Ford render, no sacrifice, no sin. Andrew." "And I am a creepy pretty easily, as they are dating and tenant of the for- Focus had its lights on. And it was amazing. All those guy. The last creepy thing I did someone much hotter than you mer Summit Compaq Without a hymnal, people Christian themes of giving into the was when I looked over at the will ever date, have been dating her Center—and I know I was were free to rock out to die will of God and begging forgiveness cute redhead in class for at least a year and will once one of them. But I bias tin' band that stood on that make me so angry were replaced and smiled when she probably end up marrying recently decided to check a moving platform between by prayers for money and success. happened to look in my her and producing many out its services for myself, rows of gospel singers, all Heck, even I prayed for my mutual general direction." more beautiful children and it was awesome. framed by fake stone wa- fund to double, and I don't believe Does this sound down the line. This was no regular ser- Evan terfalls and a giant spinning in God. familiar to you? Are Regular normal guys vice, no boring sermon in an Mintz globe. Now that is what I call Osteen continued to wax about how you one of the millions can often be found in old church. Everyone was religion — goodbye flying we should not condemn people for sin of members of Creepy similar relationships, so friendly. After parking buttresses, hello Universal but be nice to them because that is the Guys Anonymous? If although not as frequent- my car in the caverns beneath Green- Studios. No crosses, though — that only way to change them. Also, he said, you are male and go to ly with supermodels. way Plaza, I must have gotten at least would be a downer. if you do this, God will reward you with Rice, chances are the Andrew Most importantly, they five or six "Welcome, God bless you" Old ladies were shaking their a job promotion. Apparently, everything answer is "yes." Sinclair are not big on random statements from the diverse group of groove thing to the beat of the goateed is related to money. From the begging Many Rice males hookups — unlike assigned greeters who stood between guy on the bass guitar, and with the for charity — not for the poor, but for are, unfortunately, un- sketchy guys, who can the huge limestone-bordered glass and smoke machine and lighting straight Lakewood's first $10 million loan pay- aware of their creepy guy status. often be seen leaving parties with steel doors, and the escalators leading out of a discotheque, 1 don't blame ment — to being a good person for the To show them the light, and clear a girl and can then be seen avoid- up to the main arena. I mean, sanctuary. them. Plus, I am pretty sure the guy economic reward, lakewood made it things up a bit for everyone else, ing that girl like the plague for the Onegreeter even complimented meon jumping around and dancing on seem like God was just one big ATM. let's study Rice guys — the normal rest of the year as she does the my pink Goonies shirt A rainbow of stage was Turbo, the former Rockets Perfectly enough, my time at Lake- guys, the creepy guys and the same. Creepy guys are generally people more diverse than your average mascot. 1 guess he just comes with wood concluded with a little stop at the sketchy guys — and how to tell not found in relationships. But, on ADVANCE meeting just standing the venue — all he needed was a gift shop. At first glance, it seemed their them apart in various situations. the rare occasion that they are, around to make you feel good — it trampoline and a spandex suit. bookstore only sold Osteen's book. First situation: Class they're usually found taking girls doesn't get much better than that. As the singing ended, a woman I was surrounded by pictures of that A normal guy can easily be to places like Whataburger. Once Joel Osteen's book, Your Best Life with big blonde hair and what beautiful, beautiful man. But further recognized. He generally sits near back in their room, they generally Now, has replaced all the soda and looked like Juicy Couture track pants examination revealed the true way the back with his friends, wearing do something lame, like put on a popcorn at the concession stands. started a sermon. Usually, sermons to follow (k>d's path: a razor scooter! a horizontally striped polo shirt, John Cusack movie and wind up That book was freaking everywhere, are bad because they make you feel There were also Bibles, I think. un-tucked, khaki-colored cargo with a contrived good-night hug. but perfectly enough there were no ashamed both for sinning and for After visiting Lakewood Church, I shorts and a baseball cap from a There you have it. If you read Bibles. Bibles are so passe. The Bible being ignorant of the Bible. But not did not feel condemned for my sinful university otherthan Rice. Sketchy through this list and found your- is angry, judgmental and condemns at Lakewood. The woman just talked ways, damned for rejecting Jesus or guys sit way too close to the fresh- self in the creepy guy category everything fun in life — but not about how parents should raise their even uncomfortable, considering men girls and offer to help them more than once, face it, you're a Osteen. Even after the ushers led kids well. And apparently she knew the lack of crosses and Bibles. This "study." Creepy guys make up creepy guy. But now at least you me to my seat, I could not find any even less abi^t the Bible than I, atheist felt good. pretty much everyone else: the know you have a little work to do. Bibles for those biblically impaired considering her trouble recounting In the end, the only problem was guys sitting in the front row writ- So get off your ass and go talk like myself. Apparently, Lakewood is the story of Mary and Joseph. that I forgot where 1 parked my car. ing hymns about the professor, the to someone — in real life. AIM BYOB — Bring Your Own Bible. Then came the big show: Joel guy who walks in 35 minutes late doesn't count. The lyrics to the songs were Osteen. With the audience cheering as Evan Mintz is a Hanszen College to a 50-minute lecture and goes to Most importantly, stop com- displayed on the Jumbotron. Most he ran on stage, I could have sworn he sophomore and opinion editor. sleep the moment he sits down, plaining that Rice girls ignore you, and the two guys in the corner don't talk to you or already have who appear to be taking notes, boyfriends. Go find a girl and strike Rice Voices although their constant giggling up a conversation, preferably about suggests otherwise. something other than yesterday's Second situation: Parties test. And if she doesn't run away Rice practices politics of thought, not allegiance Parties make it much harder to screaming, try something new: distinguish the different kinds of Ask her to go get some coffee with Two years ago, when I mentioned facebook. com way of life. But with a total but I do think the politics and views of guys. Rice guys, having no fashion you the next day, or to get dinner I was matriculating at Rice in the fall, pool of 2,864, these statistics ought to this university are a lot more dynamic sense, all wind up looking pretty with you on Saturday. i a family friend reacted with constitute a reasonable rej>- and profound than outsiders like my much identical at parties. Howev- And girls, don't think you are some incredulity: "Rice? resentation of how current family friend will describe in one sen- er, once the main party is over, the off the hook just because the guys You don't want to go there. and recent Rice students tence. When asked about the political normal guys tend to congregate in need a little work. One of the big- They're a bunch of hippies. affiliate themselves. leanings of my school, I'd prefer instead a trashed room for several hours of gest complaints about Rice guys Ihey'll try to tell you that you Then, 1 asked a friend to comment on how informed and beer pong—or Beirut, if they have is that there are so many creepy evolved from [Kind scum!" to acquire the same incisive Rice students are in forming a popped collar—while thecreepy guys here. Well, yes, there are. like a projx^r conservative facebook.com statistics at and communicating their opinions. In and sketchy guys generally disap- But a creepy guy, it turns out, is troglodyte, I indignantly Emory University, another the end, formulating and clarifying my pear: the creepy guys to play some usually a nice, highly intelligent, responded that Rice was elite institution in a red opinions is a lot more important than Counter-Strike and the sketchy yet shy and kind of awkward guy, a lot more right-wing than state. While the results finding the right label for them. guys to "study" with whomever occasionally made creepier by other universities of its Matt were rather close over- And truth be told, my family friend (or whatever) failed to effectively the addition of alcohol. So try caliber and that primar- all. Emory is 43 percent had nothing to worry about. If I ever thwart their advances. one. You might find that the only ily the faculty generated Dunn "liberal" and 11 percent find myself too far out of my political Final situation: Relationships reason he's not Prince Charming that reputation. "conservative," making us element for my own comfort, I can Although rare, relationships on a white stallion is that animals As I heard more about noticeably more right-wing. always scurry back to the safety of my do occasionally happen at Rice. bring back his asthma and make the student body from friends and Or are we? Emory also had fewer lib- problem sets. Sometimes at Rice, it's The way a guy acts in a relation- his acne break out again. classmates, three myths became pre- ertarians, which ultimately could have convenient to be an engineer. ship can be one of the biggest dominant in my mind: Rice was far mi >re skewed the data in either direction. indicators of what kind of guy he is. Andrew Sinclair is a Sid Richard- liberal than its Texan surroundings, Perhaps the more interesting results Matt Dunn is a Martel College Athlete guys — a special subset son College sophomore. Rice was decidedly more conservative were Emory's 6percent "very liberal," sophomore. than its Tier 1 counterparts and Rice 1 percent "very conservative" and students were comparatively moderate 32 percent "moderate" populations, orapathetic to politics, preferring their numbers that would suggest that Rice The Rice Thresher, the official student Gaussian problem sets to Gallup jk»11 is, in comparison, a less centrist, more newspaper at Rice University since 1916, surveys. Now a sophomore, I won- politically fervent campus. is published each Friday during the school year, except during examination periods and dered if these myths were true. But I'm only playing games with the the Rice Thresher holidays, by the students of Rice University. Thevideoon the Admission Office's numbers. How much they really signify Web site makes it abundantly clear that about ourstudentbodydependson how Amber Obermeyer Editorial and business offices are located Rice does not share the reactionary aware and active we make ourselves Editor in Chief on the second floor of the Ley Student Center. redneck culture or (xilitics for which relative to the outside world. Maybe (il(K) Main St.. MS-524, Houston. TX 77005- 1892. Phone (713) 348-4801. Fax (713) 348- Texas is reputed — one hypothesis some of us, like Stan in the South Park Nathan Black 5238. E-mail: [email protected]. Web page: movie, become "political" to impress Senior Editor validated. P or the other two, 1 consulted www.ricethresher.org facebook.com (see box). that special girl in Mr. Garrison's class. ()thers may be more attached to social NEWS OPINION There is, of course, some marginal David Brown, Editor Annual subscription rate: $50 domestic, Evan Mintz, Editor error in these data due to non-corpo- issues than economicconcerns.orvice Risa Gordon, Editor $125 international. Nonsubscription rate: first versa, jumbling faccbook.com labels. Kirti Datla, Page Designer copy free, second copy $5. real entities like the Mason-Dixon BUSINESS Line and students who reject the I generally argue from a conserva- Debbie Miller. Business Manager SPORTS "Hie Thresher reserves the right to refuse tive stance, but Matt McCabe, Editor Elaine Lee, Payroll Manager sometimes I do Sawyer Bonsib. Subscriptions Manager any advertising for any reason. Additionally, Stephen Whitfield. Editor the Thresher does not take responsibility Anat net ic not feel Repub- Dylan Farmer, Ass#. Editor Sarah Taylor, Office Manager J Rice University Daniel Holman. Distribution Manager for the factual content of any ad. Printing lican. I won- an advertisement does not constitute an ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT Brian Wolf, Distribution Manager Libertarian Emory Univerity der whether Jonathan Schumann, Editor ADVERTISING endorsement by the Thresher. laughingatthe Julia Bursten, Asst. Editor Karen Adler, Ads Manager Daily Show is Matt Osher, Asst. Ads Manager Unsigned editorials represent the majority Conservative enough to COPY Rob Pack, Classified Ads Manager opinion of the Thresher editorial staff. All other Carl Hammarsten, Editor opinion pieces represent solely the opinion of Conservative make one lib- Mike Pavlak. Editor CALENDAR the author. The Backpage is satire. eral and if lov- Ryan Stickney, Editor Julia Bursten, Editor

Moderate ing Wal-Mart Hie Th resher is a member of the Associated is enough to PHOTOGRAPHY BACKPAGE Marshall Robinson, Editor Evan Mintz. Editor C ollegiate Press and the Society of Professional make one con- Liberal Marcus Roman, Asst. Editor Journalists. This week's ops page is entitled servative. I liana Yen, Asst. Editor Stephanie Zimmerman, Cartoonist "Evan and friends." FYZRZ2K4!... 1 am such a loser. And 1 hate graphs. very Liberal I haven't •mine*: r*cnooK.com reached neat C COPYRIGHT 2005. conclusions. rrv,

THE RICE THRESHER NEWS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005 Honor Council approves new penalty structure distress" and "a violation resulting by Beko Binder from an action unknown to the ac- THRESHER STAFF cused" as explicit mitigating circum- The Honor Council unanimously stances. Mitigating and aggravating Vvited to change its Consensus factors other than the specific ones Penalty Structure to include aggra- the council must consider may be vating circumstances in the penalty used at council members' discretion deliberation Oct. 2. Cases submit- if not explicitly prohibited. ted to the council after that date will Hanszen College junior Becky be by under the new CPS. Thilo, a junior class representative, The CPS—which is established said emotional distress was re- SANKET SHAH/THRESHER at the beginning of each school year moved as a mitigating circumstance —stipulates the penalties the coun- to protect the accused students' Let's talk about se.v cil is allowed to give students. privacy. Mora than 250 students attended a study breaks featuring a sexologist Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. The events The new aggravating circum- "Actions unknown to the ac- were hosted by the Coftege Assistance Peer Program and college healthrepresentatives an d were held in the colleges. stances are reasons for the council cused" was removed as a mitigating to give a student a harsher penalty. factor because students to whom However, the council cannot use the mitigation applies are found an aggravating circumstances to not in violation of the Honor Code, give a penalty harsher than the Thilo said. Endowment reaches $3.61 billion maximum of an F in the course At the CPS meeting, the coun- and a two-semester suspension for cil also considered an alternative by Kirti Datla tion in west a non-heinous violation. Eight of penalty structure in which delibera- Louisiana nine council members on a hearing THRESHER EDITORIAL STAFF tions would begin with a less harsh that was hit by- ENDOWMENT ASSET ALLOCATION must still vote for a violation to be penalty and would be aggravated The endowment increased 13.6 Hurricane heinous in order for the council to up or mitigated down depending percent to $3.61 billion during the Rita, but Wise The target asset allocations for the endowment for give a penalty harsher than an F and on the nature of the violation. Thilo 2005 fiscal year. Vice President for said it was not the 2006 fiscal year are: a two-semester suspension. 5- :id this scheme was abandoned Investments and Treasurer Scott significantly Mitigating circumstances can because Council members could 26% Wise (Will Rice 71) said. damaged. U.S. Stocks still be used to reduce a student's not agree on a base punishment The endowment's payout — Wise said Long/short funds and hedge funds 22% penalty. The maximum penalty for level. money from the endowment put the endow- International stocks 15% a self-accusation remains an F in "It's hard to determine what into the university's operating ment includes Venture capital/private partnerships 12% the course. a middle ground is," Thilo said. 10% budget — increased 3 percent for different types Fixed income Honor Council Chair John "We decided that since we couldn't the 2005 fiscal year, which ended ofinvestments Horstman said students will not decide on the middle ground [for June 30. because of its long-term focus. President David Leebron and notice any difference in penalties a starting penalty, the CPS we ap- The endowment performed bet- "We look over the 5- and 10-year the Budget Committee determine assigned under the new CPS. He proved ] was easiest in that we could ter than Standard and Poor's 500 periods because there are going to be the annual payout, which is then said the change was made so the all have the same starting point. index — which exhibited a 6.3 per- periods when the market environment approved by the Board of Trust- reasons for penalty decisions are We would be able to have the same cent return on investment in fiscal is difficult," said Wise. "The best tool ees, Wise said. The payout target more transparent. discussion and be able to justify our is 4.5-5.5 percent of the three-year year 2005 — because of its diverse to deal with that is to have a diversi- "[The aggravating circum- penalties better in terms of mitiga- average, Wise said. asset allocation, Wise said. fied portfolio." stances were added ] so we're better tion and aggravation." Wise said the endowment's asset Vice President for Finance Wise said he is unsure of this year's able to articulate [how we reach Horstman, said the adopted CPS exact percentage. allocation targets have not changed Kathy Collins said the endowment a penalty decision] in both the is well-balanced. The budget is supplemented since December 2004. is measured using a three-year abstracts we present to the public "I think it's a good compromise by overhead from grants, tuition, The real assets in the endowment moving average of its market value and the appeals," Horstman, a Sid that addressed [outstanding] is- annual gifts and other fund-raising, include oil and gas, real estate and to minimize large fluctuations in Richardson College junior, said. sues. and it will be a better repre- the payout. Collins said. timber. Rice owns a timber planta- The council also voted to elimi- sentation of how we come to cur nate "extreme and unusual emotional decisions." Horstman said.

•W •' •' CONSENSUS PENALTY STRUCTURE

The following are the mitigating and aggravating circumstances the Honor Council can consider when deciding on penalties:

Mitigating Circumstances • The nature of the violation • Cooperation shown through full and truthful disclosure of relevant information, which may include an plea of "In Violation" in good faith

Aggravating Circumstances 9 Deceit of council and/or false disclosure • Attempt to conceal violation • Premeditation • Collusion with other students SENIORS

Order your Official Class Ring this week at the Campus Store in the RMC.

In Wednesday & Thursday, Oct. 12 & 13 10 am - 2 pm

Learn about the traditions of the ring, its hidden symbolism, payment plans, and how to get a piece of Rice history for yourself.

Questions? Call (713) 348 4052 or visit www.balfourcollege.com THE RICE THRESHER NEWS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005

POLICE BLOTTER at forum The following items were reported to the Rice University Police Department for the period Sept. 28-0ct. 3. by Dana Hoffman Sawyer said he might seek help pus-wide attraction." TOR THE THRESHER from Sociology professor Steven Tupper said the problem might Residential Colleges Klineberg to conduct a statistically be a result of students being over- Baker College Sept. 30 Bicycle stolen. Students at a forum said underused accurate survey. worked. SA President James Lloyd Will Rice College Sept. 30 Bicycle stolen. public spaces and the communication The co-chairs also asked students said the problem might be due to a gap between north and south colleges what they think the committee should lack of a central gathering place for Baker College Oct. 1 Motorcycle drove on grass and ran are problems the new Committee on address. students. He said President David stop sign. Student issued citation and Social Culture should address. The Students disagreed about whether Leebron has suggested creating such referred to Student Judicial Programs. forum was sponsored by the Student the colleges spend too much money a space between the Rice Memorial Academic Buildings Association and held Monday. on alcohol. Center, Herring Hall and Fondren Duncan Hall Sept. 30 Laptop computer stolen. Hanszen College junior Althea Baker College junior Elliot Cole Library. Dell Butcher Hall Oct. 3 Subject with previous criminal Tupper and Earth Science Professor said students spend too much time Another student said he thought Dale Sawyer, who are the co-chairs record and known to be stalking a in their rooms. not enough students attend speeches student sighted. Subject remanded of the committee, asked students "My main issue with Rice has to do on campus, such as those in the to Harris County Jail. what they like about Rice. Students with public space," Cole said, "I see President's Lecture Series. Parking Lots mentioned the residential college public space being underused here. The committee, which will South Stadium Lot Sept. 28 Vehicle with expired sticker stopped. system, the Passport to Houston, the I see people spending most of their include seven students and seven racial and socioeconomic diversity time in their rooms.... It's kind of like Subject with prior record remanded faculty and staff members — who to Harris County Jail. of the student body, the resident a ghost town at times when I would have not yet been named — was associate and master system, the expect it to be most lively." formed by Dean of Undergradu- Biology/Geology Lot Sept. 29 Wallet stolen from vehicle. inclusiveness among students and Several students said they agreed ates Robin Forman to study the West Lot Sept. 29 Caller reported a vehicle broke a the Alcohol Policy. with Cole, including Will Rice College role of alcohol on campus and the gate arm When Sawyer suggested the freshman Susel Perez. general social environment at Rice. committee survey the student body "What [Cole] said is true," Perez Applications to join the committee Facilities and Oct. 1 Vehicle damaged. on Rice's social culture, students said. "I think we should do something will be sent to the SA listserv and Engineering Lot said past surveys have been biased. to have a place where there is a cam- are due Oct. 12. Facilities and Oct. 3 Vehicle damaged. Engineering Lot Oct. 3 Unknown subject ripped off top of VP Wright to leave for College Board West Lot gate arm box. Other Areas Subject with bottle of alcohol seen by Risa Gordon and the university needs her help," cause it really is working to encour- University Boulevard Sept. 30 walking in traffic. Subject arrested

THRESHER EDITORIAL STAFF Leebron said. "I think she realized age students to prepare for college for public intoxication and remanded that this came at a difficult point in and to be successful in getting in to Harris County Jail. Vice President for Enrollment the year, and her [future] employer and graduating," Wright said. Ann Wright will leave Rice at the was willing to be flexible so it did Wright said she will oversee end of the calendar year for a job not fall too harshly on Rice." about 20 people in the Austin of- with the College Board in Austin, The search for Wright's replace- fice and will work with senior staff STUDENT ASSOCIATION Texas. ment has not yet begun, leebron in New York on issues related to The Student Association met Oct. 3. The following were discussed. Wright came to Rice from Smith said. diversity and demographics. College in June 1999. During her Wright said her duties at Rice "I wanted this [region] because • SA President James Lloyd announced the fall senate confer- tenure as vice president, Wright will change very little in the coming I think it's [going to be] the most ence will be Oct. 16 from 3-5:30 p.m. All voting SA members instituted the two-part admission months. interesting part of the country for the and new student representatives should attend, he said. application, and Rice saw a 45 "What I'm most interested in next couple of decades," Wright said. • Three clubs were approved: Colleges Against Cancer, Americans percent increase in applications, doing is communicating to the "The growth pattern — particularly for Informed Democracy and RHAPSODY. she said. appropriate people all the things in Texas, but in the other states to a • Lloyd proposed an SA Special Committee on Business and Eco- Wright also oversaw the estab- that I've been working on so that somewhat lesser degree — and the nomics Programs, which will be voted on at the next meeting. lishment of the Century Scholar and everything can continue if there's changes in ethnic background and in Trustees Distinguished Scholar- nobody in place by the end of the the college-going numbers is great The next SA meeting will be Oct. 17 at 10 p.m. in Farnsworth ship programs, recruiting strate- year," Wright said. here. It's kind of a microcosm of the Pavilion. gies for top prospective students, Wright said she enjoyed working whole country." and increased collaboration with at Rice in part due to its academic the Registrar's and Financial Aid reputation. offices. "Being at a very prestigious President David Leebron said institution has been a real pleasure Downloading, copying and sharing out Wright has made substantial contri- because people recognize the name material, such as music, movies, games, butions to Rice. of Rice," Wright said. "It means "She has brought an immense something when you go to meet- and applications, for which you do not own the 0$ amount of knowledge and profes- ings and you represent a place copyright is both against the law and University policy ^ec sionalism to |her job|," I>eebron that is known to be such a strong said. institution and is admired for so Regular 1 )ecision applications are many things." due Jan. 10. Wright will be at Rice Wright said she is excited about almost until the end of the applica- her job as southwest region vice Did You Know? tion process. president for the College Board, a Leebron said it was important newly created position. You Can Get Expelled Wright stay at Rice through most Wright said the College Board of this year's application cycle. is involved in a wide range of pro- You Can Get Sued "I decided [Wright should stay grams. through the end of the calendar " [The College Board's activities year] because I need her help, include] far more than testing, be- Free Movies? Free Music? Free Software? Not Really...

If you are downloading and/or distributing copyrighted material for "free," you might be on your way to U-Court. The first infraction for Engineering students results in a warning from the Rice Information Technology Security Office. The second infraction is addressed in U-Court.

UNIVERSITY OF PENNSYLVANIA'S According to the Appropriate Use Policy (AUP), the University will take disciplinary actions as necessary with those that use Rice SCHOOL OF ENGINEERING 6 APPLIED SCIENCE resources - computers, networks, etc - for illegal activities Graduate Programs Big Brother IS Watching IS COMING TO RICE!

The 'Big Three" copyright holders, The Recording Industry Association of

Friday. October 7, 21)05 America (RIAA), the Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA). and Duncan Hall Room 1044 the Business Software Alliance (BSA). continue to aggressively protect 10 a.m.- 3p.m. their copyrights via cease and desist notices and. in many cases, suing individuals for monetary damages.

Although Rice University strives to protect personal information as much as Come speak with representatives about possible, as an Internet Service Provider (ISP), Rice is legally obligated to provide the Master's and Ph.D. programs identifying information about students, faculty and staff when served with a valid subpoena. offered at this cosmopolitan Details at: http://www rice edu/it/ fj J Ivy League institution! THE RICE THRESHER NEWS FRIDAY. OCTOBER 7.2005

"Now, if a group at Rice wants - to propose a new m^gor, it has to MINOR DETAILS MINORS be voted on by faculty, but once From page 1 it's approved, then the department Universities wtth minors: Universities with no minors: owns it and maintains it," Pomerantz Stanford University Harvard University Surrounding issues of certifications that students can said. "We had some discussion about Dartmouth College Yale University Wilson said committee mem- have — for example, no more than whether we need recertification— Duke University Princeton University bers raised questions about how three total," Kehoe said. The curriculum shouldn't be dead. Northwestern University Columbia University minors would be approved and The committee also discussed You don't want people doing minors Massachusetts Institute of Technology Johns Hopkins University about potential limits on the num- possible restrictions to minors, in astrology just because it was done ber of minors students would be such as only allowing minors in 150 years ago." allowed to have. subjects not offered as majors. TTie committee also discussed MAJOR DETAILS If minors are adopted, Kehoe Another issue the committee dis- how minors are perceived by 2004 2003 said he hopes the committee will cussed is whether or not minors will employers and graduate schools. Bachelor's degrees awarded at Rice 631 663 limit the total number of majors and appear on students' transcripts. Pomerantz said he wants to solicit Students with two majors (percent of total) 246 (39) 266 (40) minors students can declare. Pomerantz said the committee input from these groups. Students with three majors (percent of total) 20 (3) 22 (3) "If minors are approved, we also must decide how minors would "I would like to have a little also ought to cap the total number be evaluated after being approved stronger indication from gradu- Source: 2003 and 2004 faculty meeting minutes ate school admission officers and employers that this is something they value," Pomerantz said. "I'm set of requirements like we have do? Would you drop your double told that many Rice students will with current majors," Kehoe said. major and take a minor instead?"' double and triple major because "I also hope it will become easier Pomerantz said. they believe it will give them an for students to branch out into However, the proposal may §£jl J Information Technology advantage down the road, but it disciplines that are less related to never leave the curriculum com- could be that the students who their main field of study." mittee, Forman said. double and triple major are students If the proposal is adopted, stu- "Getting to the final proposal f TECH FAIR who are high-achieving. I'm a little dents could consult the published is an iterative procedure — some skeptical that people might mis-at- set of courses required for a minor questions will be asked, and per- tribute the results." instead of having to seek individual- haps concerns expressed," Forman Wilson said he plans to speak ized advice, Pomerantz said. said. The proposal may be modi- with representatives from the "If there is a recommended fied in response to this reaction, and Wednesday, October 26, 2005 Career Services Center to deter- sequence of courses, then students this might be repeated a few times. 11:00 a.m. - 3:00 p.m. mine if offering minors would know it's been thought out by Even after all that, the curriculum make students more attractive to people in the past and that other committee may decide there's not RMC Grand Hall employers. students have followed it — that can a proposal that they're willing to be a basis for determining course endorse, in which case the issue Potential advantages selection," Pomerantz said. "Most might stop with them." Dean of Undergraduate En- faculty will tell you few students See the latest from rollment Julie Browning said she come to their office hours. Maybe Curricular review thinks few prospective students students feel awkward about asking Forman said he thinks all uni- Apple, Dell, HP and others. are dissuaded from applying to Rice questions or maybe faculty mem- versities should regularly review because it does not offer minors. bers send signals saying, 'Don't their curricula. However. Browning said having a bother me' — it's probably a mix- "One of the reasons my posi- There will be Door Prizes, wider range of academic programs ture of the two." tion was created was so that there would be appealing to prospective Improving individualized aca- would be someone whose job it is Cookies, and Giveaways! students. demic advising is difficult, Pomer- to keep an eye on curriculum and Kehoe said he thinks having antz said. oversee the review process." For- minors would help students study "Anybody could tell you who the man said. a wider range of topics more ef- best researchers at Rice are or who Pomerantz said the Rice curricu- fectively. the best teachers at Rice are, but we lum has not changed much since "My ideal would be to see don't have any awards for advising, Norman Hackerman was president http://\v\\ sv.rice.edu/market/techfair/ programs proliferate that offer and no person ever got promoted from 1970-'85. students a wider range of choices or a salary increase based on per- "Essentially, we're dealing with without confining them to a huge formance as an adviser," Pomerantz the same curricular structure that said. "And advising is very difficult existed under President Hacker- to evaluate — you want to know, man, but the world is a completely 'Was that good advice?' Well, check different place than it was the back in 30 years." 1970s," Pomerantz said. "Certainly new courses exist now. but the basic Upcoming process structure is the same." Examining the issue of minors Forman said studying the pos- Ethics, Politics, & Society will take many months, Forman sibility of adding minors is worth- said. while regardless of whether or nut "Our goal at this moment is to any proposal is approved. focus in on what the right ques- "Part of the justification for this Lecture Series tions are, rather than attempting to process is simply getting people get immediately to a final answer, re-energized and re-focused on the "Forman said. Rice undergraduate program and Pomerantz said he hopes the what we're trying to accomplish," committee will survey students Forman said. after developing a more precise The last major curricular reform description of minors. was attempted in the late 1990s, "Once we have a picture in when the Faculty Council approved Roger Scruton mind of what these minors might a curriculum requiring students to be, I would like us to commission take classes in "Five ways of know- a student survey asking, 'If this ing," but the proposal was voted "Sexual Morality for Heathens" would be available, what would you down by the full faculty.

We...really....will,... Roger Scruton is one of the most important conservative philosophers of our age. He was Professor of Aesthetics at GIVE YOU Birkbeck College, London, and has had visiting posts at many other universities. Scruton has published more than thirty books, MONEY!!

among them The Meaning of Conservatism, Sexual Desire, The Awards vary up to several thousand dollars! Aesthetics of Music, and An Intelligent Person's Guide to Modern Culture. Especially in his native Britain, Scruton has been an Applications are sought for the Dr. Bill Wilson Student Initiative Grant. The fund supports influential political activist and prolific journalist. A magnificent innovative student projects that will improve writer and splendid polemicist, Scruton's lectures and essays can undergraduate lite at Rice. Emphasis is given to be counted on to inspire, provoke, and entertain. improving infrastructure tor student-run activi- ties, hut anything worthwhile except salaries and travel will be considered. Submit 6 copies of a short (2-3 page) proposal, with detailed budget and project description to: Date: Thursday. October 13, 2005 Time: 4:00 - 5:30 p.m. Dr. Bill Wilson Grant c/o Katharine Donato Location: Kelly International Conference Facility, James A. Baker 111 Hall Master, Wiess College MS 738

Proposals due November 4, 2(M)5 by 4;()() PM.

» THE RICE THRESHER ARTS * ENTERTAINMENT FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005

THE THRESHER'S OXk 1( /s v RECOMMENDATIONS *, ,\ * FOR EVENTS AROUND HOUSTON THROUGH Wiess freshmen impress with One-Act plays OCTOBER 20, 2005. Julia Bursten THRESHER EDITORIAL STAFF Most freshmen have a difficult EDI enough time adjusting to the Rice lifestyle without taking on challeng- ing extracurricular activities. None- picks theless, 18 Wiess College freshmen chose to spend their first seven weeks at Rice doing theater, challenging not this weekend only themselves but the very bounds of normalcy. DON'T DO i DRUGS, JUST 'wiess freshman SEE THIS MOVIE one-acts'

Director Terry Gilliam's Wiess College Rating: •••1/2 brilliant take on Hunter % (out of five) S. Thompson's Fear and October 13-15 at 8:00 p.m. Loathing in Las Vegas $4 admission

is this week's midnight The annual Freshman One-Acts MARCUS ROMAN/THRESHER movie. Johnny Depp and have existed at Wiess for more than Wiess College freshman Michael Curtis, right, plays God and Wiess freshmen Adam Ellsworth and Cynthia Bova are his 30 years, technical director Malcolm Benicio del Toro star. creations in The Whole Shebang. Eckel, a junior, said. This year, eight Tonight and tomorrow Wiess upperclassmen paired up to freshman Michael Curtis finds just the of the four plays, and Wiess fresh- The evening closes with The Mor- at midnight. direct four short plays, all of which right balance of omniscient pride and men Johan Loveless and Meltem pheus Quartet, a spoken-word canon confront themes of altered reality or academic nerves — his occasional Demirors provide spot-on caricatures by John Glore. Four musicians begin The River Oaks. social norms. quick-talking stutter and constant of stereotypical professors. the round in the dark, posing with 2009 West Gray. The One-Acts begin with Kate fawning in the face of his dean ice the After the intermission, the skits imaginary instruments. TT.3y talk Hoffower's The Office, a less-funny cake — to convince audiences the resume with Katherine Barna's/Way over each other, in partial phrases Please call satire in the vein of Office Space. Wi- universe really could simply be his in a Manger, a critique of the tradition and complete sentences that mirror (713) 866-8881 ess freshmen Karla Wallace and An- C-plus science project. of family holidays that reveals just the themes, variations and harmonies of a string quartet. for more information. gel Allen play anonymous customer As God's defense continues, his how bizarre families can be, no matter service employees who muse about unseen roommate brings in a couple how normal they seem on the surface. Themusicianstellstoriesof dreams giving their boss a heart attack as a pieces of evidence to support his thesis: The script, which feels a little Tom- they had, overlapping and interweav- oct. 15 and 16 way to alleviate their boredom. two average human beings, Harvey Stoppard-esque, successfully forces ing in volume and prominence. The The concept is a little bland but is and Edna Doe (Wiess freshmen Adam audiences to shift their perceptions effect really does sound like music, PRESTON well-executed, and the girls end up in Ellsworth and Cynthia Bova). The sub- as the play progresses, but lacks and the quartet, comprised of Wiess a deal that is sealed with Take your sequent exchanges grow increasingly any of the genius of Rosencrantz and freshmen Arin Lastufka, Rob McAu- STURGES bra off and I'll teach you how to use candid as the "specimen" lose their Guildenstern Are Dead. liffe, Erika Fruss and Roque Sanchez, Quark Express." In the meantime, initial fears that anything they say will Away in a Manger's players man- time their lines with the precision of If you love classic Wiess freshman Sam Chang effec- damn them in the eyes of their creator. age well given the constraints of the practiced orchestral players. While their interactions cover the full American film, then don't tively mimes a parallel boredom in script, and co-directors Wiess junior While producing any play withir the boss' office, and he delivers the spectrum of human emotion in a short Jon Harris Maurer and senior Chloe the first seven weeks of the semester miss the free double most amusing physical comedy of 15 minutes of inter rogation—and Har- Walker pull off the most complex scene is an ambitious project, these four feature of The Miracle of the dialogue-heavy evening. vey manages to work in praise of the changes and blocking of the night. Wi- complex sketches challenged their Hie second sketch of the evening, glory of beer — the human condition ess freshman Vickie Trinh stands out Morgan's Creek and Hail actors and directors more than appropriately titled 77ic Whole Shebang, does not impress the reviewing board in this skit, playing a hyperactive and many longer pieces. Wiess rose to the Conquering Hero, steals the show. Written by Rich ()rloff, as well as God had hoped. disturbed child ofan indeterminate age the challenge and brings its audi- two Preston Sturges the play imagines God as a master's The Whole Shebang's not-quite-ir- who becomes more and more lucid as ence thoughtful theater and actors degree student defending his M.IJ. reverent one-liners keep audiences members of her family reveal more and who show much promise for future classics. (Master of the Universe) thesis. Wiess engaged throughout this longest more psychoses. productions. Oct. 15 and 16 at 7 p.m. Y(H THINK YOl K FAMILY IS WEIRD. The Rice Media Center.

ongoing Eccentricity abounds in funny, but uneven Players' show

CRITICAL SPACE Jonathan Schumann ing memories of her fractured THRESHER EDITORIAL STAFF youth. Her father (Hanszen Col- The Contemporary Wallace Shawn's Aunt Dan and lege senior Jonathan Levy) is an Arts Museum, Houston Lemon is a tall order. Director Ben American Anglophile whose pas- Burford, a Brown College senior, sion for crumpets seems to veil an presents the first survey and his cast and technical crew acute contempt and anxiety for the of American artist Andrea attempt to traverse the emotional adult working world. Her mother (Martel College senior Kristin Zittel's work in Andrea peaks and valleys of Shawn's darkly comic play with varying success. Smith) is a housewife equally Zittel: Critical Space. And while several actors capture concerned with Lemon's abnormal The CAMH. Opens Oct. 6. Shawn's warped sensibilities, the eating habits and the bombing of company as a whole seems to have North Vietnam. Lemon's most 5216 Montrose. trouble pegging the play's tone, significant past relationship was Please call which is as erratic and off-putting as with her parents' friend Danielle, the mentally unbalanced characters affectionately deemed Aunt Dan (713) 284 8250 for more in the production. (Hanszen senior Claire Sudolsky), information. a vibrant, carefree professor at Oxford. The two bond as Aunt Dan /I gabs about topics ranging from 'aunt dan and how Lemon's parents met to her lemon' slightly unhealthy obsession with The Rice Players Henry Kissinger. % Rating: *•• These chats take place in Lemon's (out of five) childhood bedroom, a space set de- October 13-15 at 8:00 p.m. signer Kyle Ragan, a Brown senior, Free admission playfully brings to life with walls covered in pink-and-white-striped On the surface, Lemon (Brown wallpaper, bordered with a stencil sophomore Natalie Navar) is a of pink hearts and a bedspread to slightly-off young woman who sits match. The show's lighting design, alone, taking sips also by Ragan, is equally dynamic, of celery juice in applying warm pinks to the scenes between diatribes between Aunt Dan and Lemon defending the Na- and colder blues and greens when zis' extermination Lemon's parents emerge. of the Jews and The play's most successful and long digressions hilarious scene occurs when Aunt Lemon (Brown College sophomore Natalie Navar, left) has an emotional moment into nostalgia. As Dan employs the stuffed animals with her mother (Martel College senior Kristin Smith) in Aunt Dan and Lemon. she recalls her surrounding Lemon's bed — an Vietnam-era Eng- eagle, crab and baby doll — to doll representing the Soviet Union Sudolsky, speaking in a high- lish upbringing, explain the necessity of America's and exclaiming, "You know it's pitched, exasperated tone, works people from her involvement in Vietnam. Just imag- the hypocrisy of it all that makes wonders with this plum role. As past drift on and ine Sudolsky, holding the eagle me just want to crawl to the toilet she espouses on Kissinger and off stage, conjur- representing America and the baby and vomit!" See PLAYERS, page 9 THE RICE THRESHER ARTS > ENTERTAINMENT FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005

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COURTESY NEW LINE CINEMA Houston Ballet invigorates classical form Viggo Mortensen and Maria Bello star as Tom and Edie Stall, a couple whose lives undergo dramatic transformations in A History of Violence. Margaret Tung choreographed one-act. The piece jiri Kylian's three-movement bal- THRESHER STAFF is set to Johann Sebastian Bach's let that was inspired by an Edvard Houston Ballet's Mentors & Partita No. 2 and proves baroque Munch painting of water taking over Stunning film probes Prodigy presents a delightful melodies can be seamlessly com- land, follows. The ballet is set to compilation of three ballets, each bined with modern steps. The mini- Benjamin Britten's Sinfonia da Re- offering its own unique take on the malist set, almost reminiscent of a quiem, which was originally written classical dance form. The ballets are catwalk, features black-corseted as a protest of the Nazi movement. society's inherent 'Violence' far from trite, rosy-cheeked produc- dancers on a white floor against a The tone of the ballet is not political, tions like "Nutcracker," and instead black background. but it does evoke a sense of life's Jonathan Schumann frenzy, drawing newscasters from verge on mysteriousness. Still, the The strategic use of lighting loss and struggle and the difficult THRESHER EDITORIAL STAFF across the country to the Stalls' foundations of classical ballet play by Nicholas Phillips, who also de- choices people face. David Cronenberg's.4 History of serene Indiana town. Newspapers a prominent role, as the company signed the set, d raws the audience's The costumes are an odd juxta- Violence attacks and deconstructs and magazines instantly brand does not skimp on the playfulness attention not only to the perfectly position of The Scarlet Letter and American culture with a devastat- Tom a local hero, valorizing his and the symmetrical formations synchronized group choreography Night of the Living Dead, with the ingly visceral acuity rarely seen in violent actions. A mysterious that make ballet a treat to watch. but also to dancer Kelly Myernick's ballerinas' billowy, flowing silk mainstream film. Ashe explores the group of men in suits, led by Carl spectacular solos. A particularly skirts adding an extra element of small-town world ofTom Stall (77/e Fogarty (Pollock' sEd Harris),also enjoyable portion of the one-act is lyrical easiness to a somber adap- Ij)rd of the Kings' Viggo Mortensen) descend on the town. Fogarty, 'mentors & the interaction of Myernick with tation of the Munch painting. The and the society's gradual descent who has a mangled, scarred face, prodigv-' her tulle skirt, which she uses as ballet is often accented by quick, into chaos, he touches on aspects claims to knowTom and hisviolent both prop and costume. The ballet dramatic percussion cues, and the of the male psyche and the violence tendencies firsthand. Cronenberg at Houston Ballet is both simple and "lovely," as the pas-a-deux expressively captures inherent to American life in a bru tal explores the legitimacy of these Rating: ••••• title suggests, and the clean lines the heightened emotions the music manner mainstream audiences claims through a series of continu- (out of five) allow the audience to focus on and choreography delineate. have never seen before. ally startling revelations. These The first piece, the world pre- the dancing. The final ballet, Divergence, moments — shocking, potent miere of locally-trained Brian Enos' Forgotten Land, a Houston Ballet is from Houston Ballet artistic- and assembled in an atmosphere Dark and Lovely, is an exquisitely premiere of Czech choreographer See BALLET, page 9 of mounting tension — create A 'a history of History of Violence as a pure thrill, violence' a film as concerned with social commentary as it is with good, in theaters old-fashioned suspense. COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY Rating: •••• 1/2 (out of five) As much attention as he pays to SCHOOL OF I NTERNATIONAl AND PUBLIC AFFAIRS setting and atmosphere, Cronen- Early in the film, Cronenberg berg exhibits similar zeal for THE EARTH INSTITUTE AT COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY establishes the Stalls' existence character. During the film'schilling as one of utter rural bliss. ITiey reversals, Cronernberg hones in are a family that hugs, constantly on character, allowing his actors affirms then love for one another to draw on their contrasting pain, and works hard. When Sarah pride and fear. Before his role in 77re (newcomer Heidi Hayes), the Lordofthe Rings trilogy, Mortensen Earn your MPA in Environmental you ngest child, wakes u p scream- garnered attention for his brooding ing from a bad dream, Tom. his performance as GwynethPaltrow's Science and Policy wife Edie (The Coolers Maria Bel- jealous lover in A Perfect Murder. lo) and their son Jack (newcomer Here, he naturally slides into the Ashton Holmes) all rush into her role of All-American family man. bedroom to comfort her. But his real achievement comes when he begins to tear away at this The Master of Public Administration An endearing gesture to be sure, but in Cronenberg's facade, revealing what Cronenberg Program in Environmental Scicncc hands—and set to Howard Shore's proposes is the darker side of male warm, pastoral score — this behavior. and Policy combines Columbia moment appears eerily domestic. Meanwhile, in a role that could University's hands-on approach One of film's most provocative and easily have slipped into caricature, enigmatic filmmakers, Cronenberg Bello paints Edie as a strong to teaching public policy and chronicled one man's descent into woman steadily driven to fear her schizophrenia in Spider, thesinister own husband. As the nuclear fam- administration with pioneering lives of twin gynecologists in Dead ily begins to fall apart and the lines thinking about the environment. Ringers and a scientist's terrifying between civility and the primeval transformation into an insect in The begin to blur, both Mortensen's This twelve-month program takes Fly. His films carry the promise of and Bello's stunning portrayals shock and an often uneasy sense become fully evident. place at Columbia University's of impending hysteria. like the In smaller roles, both Harris New York campuses. ojx'ning scenes in David Lynch's and William Hurt (Broadcast Blue Velvet, the bucolic splendor News) provide fascinating por- of this family's existence is just traits as men who, in the hands too perfect. of another filmmaker, might have For more information, please call The Stalls' world is turned up- been demonized for their sadistic- 212-854-3142, e-mail [email protected], side down when Tom kills two "bad behavior. Here, though, they only men" who attempt to hold up his add to the film's ever-increasing or visit our Web site. diner. Tom defends his staff and pa- level of moral complexity. trons in a shocking, violent scene. In the end, Cronenberg does Mortensen's intense physicality not set out to judge his characters. and Cronenberg's ultimate visual Asense of moral ambiguity hangs control intentionally pay homage over the picture. Instead, this film Application deadline for early decision: November 1 to the type of action most often seen is about man's inherent capacity in Jerry Bruckheimer-produced, and thirst for violence. The result Nicholas Cage-starring fare. is chilling, brilliant and not to be www.columbia.edu/cu/mpaenvironment This incident sparks a media missed. THE RICE THRESHER ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005

SI') (, \UI S Intrigue and suspense take center stage in Alley's 'Hapgood'

Lauren Hunt Hapgood — he can no longer be FOR THE THRESHER trusted by the Russians or the British, The Alley Theatre's production and she is suspected of involvement of Hapgood portraysTom Stoppard's because she is responsible for him. clever tale of Cold War espionage and The plot becomes further convoluted deception in an inventive modern when Hapgood and Kerner's son is context. Director Gregory Boyd kidnapped, apparently by the Rus- transforms the circuitous story of sians, in an attempt to extort the double-and triple-agents into a some missing information. what techno-inspired version of the As the play progresses into the original text. second act, Stoppard choreographs a- complicated dance of deception and trickery. Nothing is as it appears. 'hapgood' Twins abound — both real and fake ones — and quantum principles, Alley Theater usually related by Joseph or Ridley, Rating: ••• 1/2 help explain — or often confound % (out of five) — the action. There is eventually a Through October 23 clever solution, deftly presented and finally reached after the chaos of the The only female agent in her unit play's latter half. of British Intelligence, Hapgood The quantum principles of physics Oosie de Guzman) "plays chess at times weigh down the play's dia- without a board," maintaining con- logue, although the actors, especially trol over her male counterparts: Bean, brilliantly hold the audience's Joseph Kerner (Todd Waite), a Rus- attention through even the densest sian physicist-turned-double-agent explanations of such concepts. Rice who also happens to be the father physics and astronomy professor of Hapgood's illegitimate son, and Paul Padley served as a scientific Ridley Geffrey Bean), another British adviser for the cast. COURTESY ALLEY THEATER spy who significantly adds to the un- Waite also infallibly conveys British Intelligence agent Hapgood (Josie de Guzman) becomes distressed after a conversation with Blair (John Tyson) dertone of sexual tension that buzzes intense emotion and passion when in the Alley Theater's production of Tom Stoppard's comedic thriller Hapgood. beneath the play's action. describing atoms and particles, The play begins with the confus- especially at the end of the first act impressive in her portrayal of both it corresponds with the unpredict- the twists and turns of the already ing intricacies of espionage. Informa- with his claim that "every atom is a Hapgood and her twin sister — her ability of the rest of the plot, and intricate plot and fast-paced dialogue. tion is supposed to be passed off in cathedral."These concepts, although facial expressions and the subtle the subsequent implied love scene The neon lighting and techno music a men's changing room at a public now dated vestiges of the Cold War differences in the way she walks between Hapgood and him feels between scenes allow for drastic swimming pool. 'Hie drop, which is era, serve as analogies to the intrica- distinguish the two characters. forced and generally unpleasant. changes in location without breaking also a trap, and the switch ultimately cies of the plot — both are insanely However, despite the performers' Jeff Cowie's minimalist scenic the natural flow of the plot. go inexplicably wrong. complicated, and just when you think talent at portraying dual roles, a gen- design not only suits the play's cen t ral Those familiar with Stoppard's By observing the drop, the afore- you have figured them out. another eral lack of amorous chemistry takes theme of espionage in the Cold War, other works — particularly Rosen- mentioned agents have influenced layer remains to be discovered. away from the sexual undertones but also adds a technological aspect crantz and Guildenstern are Dead the outcome, a blunder Joseph Another strength is the actors' that permeate the play. Joseph and that puts Stoppard's play in a more — will recognize the convoluted compares to light — depending on ability to portray multiple characters. Hapgood lack a spark, but even less modern context. The simplicity of the nature of this play, where nothing is how one looks at the situation, it As Joseph says, "We're all doubles." chemistry exists between Ridley and play's sets, as well as the costuming, as it seems. But those with a prefer- can either appear to be a particle No one is who they appear to be, and Hapgood's twin in the Act Two hotel is a much-needed relief from the com- ence for simple, straightforward plots or a wave. The blown drop causes the actors portray their dual roles to scene. Ridley's sudden confession of plexity of the rest of the production. or merely a short attention span may problems for both Joseph and perfection. De Guzman is especially desire seems out of place, although Anything else would distract from find it difficult to follow. PLAYERS From page 7

American foreign policy, she cre- provide both sheer comic relief and. ates Aunt Dan as both a passionate more practically, a portrait of Lemon's and seductive figure. One can easily parents' pre-marital life. While these see how the naive, troubled Lemon actors have their moments, these is attracted to the elder woman's segments lag and emerge as wholly exuberant presence. superfluous. The lack of an intermis- Aunt Dan's monologues, as well sion hinders these scenes and the as the scenes between Aunt Dan and show's overall flow. Lemon, work well, hitting the right Aunt Dan and Ismon can only balance of subversive humor and be faulted for its lofty ambitions. I painful human drama. But when the imagine even the most seasoned play begins to delve into the adult theater professionals would have characters' seedy past, it loses its trouble pinning down Shawn's pre- focus and has trouble negotiating carious comedy and statements on »fir. Shawn's erratic tone. humanity. Burford deserves credit In these scenes, Mindy (Wiess for attempting to make sense of this College freshman Khris Rypl). Andy mess. So do his actors, particularly (Baker College freshman Stefan Sudolsky, who makes an audience Goshev) and Raimondo (Baker fresh- feel the same passionate concern man Faheem Ahmed) are unsavory her character does for a now-archaic characters ostensibly presented to chapter of American history. /^OOD CHARLOTTE SEETHER BALLET From page 8 CUNTBLACKriN director Stanton Welch. Described cobalt colors that the backgrounds by the choreographer as a "collage diffuse into when signaling a of emotions and situations," the change of scene. Hie choreography ballet presents flawless technique of the art director extraordinaire in an idiosyncratic fashion. For makes taking one's eyes off the example, that combination is stage difficult, especially when the URDAY achieved when the troupe enters male and female dancers face off and form a chessboard-like arrange- and exits the stage on pointe but 4!t; aii-ofii i* with knees bent and shoulders ment. However, the male dancers a jmi squared, conjuring the image of carry the ballet by fully embodying a black widow. Georges Bizet's L'Arlesienne as they add surprising sensuality and liveliness to the closing act. The ballet is The purpose of these ballets is often accented by not to carry a rigid plot. Rather, the audience develops its own QUICK, dramatic perspective through the well-cho- reographed performances and percussion cues. simplistic imagery. The lack of a The motif of a modernized clas- hard-and-fast plot should not turn sical ballet is further carried out by audiences away, because Mentors is the upright black tutus the dancers a must-see assemblage of modern- don, all of which are outlined in the infused ballets that brings classic ©i'OOS. &POETZL BREWERY. SHINER, TX 77984 WWW SftVNER COM 1.800.5SHINER various gold-yellow, magenta and enchantment to the stage. 10 THE RICE THRESHER ARTS fk ENTERTAINMENT KKIDAY.OCTOBE, R 7,2005 Z", . m :•

ri111 hi I'I Rl iX I This Martha Stewart fan's troubles never cease Ps What a turbulent time to be "Well, Dave, I don't think I did a supporter of all things Martha anything wrong." Stewart During her trial, she was And if s a shame that nobody a bullseye for media scrutiny. I is watching her show, because it laughed off the constant barrage perfectly uses the Martha Stewart of mocking mono- that I heart so much. logues from Conan, I can't really say what Leno and the rest, but it is about Stewart that I was weeping on the sparks my adoration. inside. Then she had Maybe it's her dedica- her stint as the nation's tion to upholding do- foremost domestic mestic tranquility. We jailbird. I did not weara never had dyed pistachio "Free Martha" T-shirt, wreaths in my house but I stood vigilant, growing up, but there knowing that anyone Jonathan were plenty of other who could concoct Schumann Martha-inspired crafts. COURTESY SONY PICTURE CLASSICS a Christmas wreath And while I haven't yet Justin (Lou Puccl) has a bit of a thumbsucking problem in writer/director Mike Mills' new film Thumbsucker. made out of dyed pis- made my own canvas tachios could brave the rug or perfected the art conditions of a women's prison. of napkin folding or lamp-painting, Now, with two television shows I still find Stewart's trailblazing eye Adolescent life in 'Thumb' not funny enough on the air, she has the potential for perfection endearing. to be America's sweetheart again. This creative spirit is on full Tasha Chemplavil reminiscent of Bill and Ted's Excel- is appreciated — it shows how There's just one problem: Nobody display on Stewart's daytime talk FOR THE THRESHER lent Adventure) eventually provides quickly people jump to medication is tuning in. show. Of her two programs, this "When you feel like sucking your a solution. Perry, who acts not only as a panacea for all the problems in In what should be the golden one sticks closer to the image thumb, call on your power animal," is as an orthodontist but as a personal the world — the plot development age of being a Martha Stewart she has perfected — that of the just one of the inanely hilarious lines guru as well, hypnotizes Justin, tell- is unnecessary. Instead of using fan, both the domestic goddess' crafty, ever-so-composed home- in writer/director Mike Mills' Thumb- ing him to seek help from his "power his triumph over thumbsucking daytime television show, Martha, maker next door. Things are a sucker, the story of a 17-year-old boy animal" and making his thumb taste as the impetus for Justin's new and and her foray into primetime real- little less warm on her version of who still clings to the childhood habit like Echinacea. improved persona, Mills adds this ity TV, The Apprentice: Martha The Apprentice, which comes off of thumbsucking. And while the film While the concept of the "power new pathological angle. Stewart, are lagging in the ratings. as a campy, silk-laced version of initially revels in its eccentricity, it animal" and Vince Vaughn's comedic And while Justin's change over Her talk show even ranks behind the Donald Trump original. In ultimately takes a serious turn that work as Mr. Geary, Justin's sexually the course of the film is handled sleazefests Montel and Maury. the daytime, however, Martha is too often dilutes its humor. ambiguous teacher, elicit chuckles, with focus and care, the secondary truly affable, yakking it up with the chuckling does not last long. The characters seem to change for no celebrity guests and tossing out first half of the movie commits itself reason. Having the orthodontist be I still find tons of home improvement tips. to unabashedly entertaining the audi- a hypnotist is fine but when Rebecca Stewart's Her interactions with the 'thumbsucker' ence with ridiculous one-liners, while (The Aviators Kelli Garner) — a celebrities are quite funny. Just the second half takes a 180-degree master debater and environmental trailblazing eye imagine Laura Linney (The Exor- in theaters turn into serious territory. activist — descends to the level of Rating: •• 1/2 Just as Justin's life seems to be stoner, no explanation for her mo- cism of Emily Rose) talking about (out of five) for perfection the thrill she gets from planting shaping up, he is suddenly forced to tive is given. ENDEARING. bulbs. Better yet, how about In the film, Justin Cobb's (Empire deal with problems greater than his Although Thumbsucker s plot is P. Diddy in the garden? Ealls' Lou Pucci) life does not seem thumbsucking. Drugs, extramarital haphazard, the performances by How can this be? Martha's Watching Stewart's show has to be going the way he wants. He is affairs, leaving home and a scene Pucci and Vaughn are admirable. release from prison was a potential become a morning ritual. With its on the debate team but never actually involving the disturbing retrieval of Pucci effectively plays the part of public relations nightmare, but choice 10 a.m. time slot, it makes debates. He wants to go to New York drugs from Law and Orders Ben- socially awkward thumbsucker Stewart handled the precarious for perfect pre-class viewing. for college but lacks the necessary jamin Bratt's nether regions (an turned Ritalin-addicted debate situation with characteristic grace Picture me, spooning my yogurt grades. His younger brother has image which will forever be burned champion. And Vaughn's comic under fire. Instead of dodging and sipping my coffee while more experience with girls than into my retinas) all seem discordant mastery seems to grow with his questions about her incarcera- watching Martha go on and on he does, and his orthodontist is his with the quirkiness of the first half filmography. tion, Stewart confronted them as about roasted red pepper hum- closest friend. of the film. Ultimately, 7Ttumbsucker\mmi\es she would any pesky household mus. There really isn't any better All of Justin's problems appear to As Justin grows up, he ceases a humorous but uneven glimpse into chore—with uncommon Zealand way to start the day. stem from hisjuvenile thumbsucking to be the socially awkward ado- the life of a socially awkward high- composure. Her performance on I suggest that everyone, even addiction. His parents (The Dan- lescent the audience fell in love schooler. When Justin is stuck in a Ihe Ixite Show with David Letter- the skeptics, tune in and start gerous Lives of Altar Boys' Vincent with. His problems progress from state of arrested development, the man alone was worthy of whole- to wear down America's cold D'Onofrio and The Deep Ends Tilda thumbsucking to ADHD. While film is quite funny. Unfortunately, hearted public redemption. She shoulder against the oft-maligned Swinton) attempt to break him of this the scene depicting how Justin's he, like everyone else, has to grow sat across from the gap-toothed Stewart. Come on guys, domestic habit but fail. Hisorthodontist, Perry vaguely relevant symptoms imme- up. And when that happens, the film funny man and directly answered goddesses need our love too. (Keanu Reeves, in a performance diately lead to his ADHD diagnosis gets a thumbs-down. questions about her trial, life in the big house and all that both ordeals Jonathan Schumann is a Baker entailed. The best moment came College senior and arts and when, head held high, she said, entertainment editor. FESTIVAL WATCH Amateur Salsa Dance Contest • Door Prizes • Raffle! The fifth annual Latin American Film Festival begins tonight and features six films from Argentina, Brazil, Chile, Columbia, Cuba ana Mexico. Here is a Del Lspadm Flamenco glance at the films featured at this years event, which runs through Oct. 17.

Resistencia: Hip Hop Cabeza de Vaca Machuca & Spanish Dance in Columbia Spanish conquistador Director Andres Wood's Director Tom Feiling's Cabeza de Vaca is the subject semi-autobiographical documentary exlores the of this historical drama, which film charts militar oppres- Presents various ways in which Hip chronicles the explorer's life sion and political insta- Hop culture affects dispos- after he survives a shipwreck bility in Chile through the sessed Columbian youths. off the coast of Florida. eyes of two 1 1 -year-old When: Tonight and When: Oct. 14 at 7 p.m. children whose parents tomorrow at 8 p.m. and Oct. 16 at 3 p.m. have divergent political Where: Rice Media Center Where: The Museum of Fine views. Arts, Houston When: Oct. 15 at 9 p.m. La Sierra and Oct. 16 at 7 p.m. This film, from directors The Other Side of the Where: The MFAH Scott Dalton and Margari- Street C tK i ta Martinez explores three Central Station's Fernanda The Holy Girl young Columbians' affilia- Montenegro stars as a lonely This Argentinian film tions with illegal paramili- woman who works on a explores the religious and tary and drug activity in Sunday, October 23 • 2 - 7pm • Tickets $30 neighborhood watch in Rio sexual coming-of-age of that fractured country. de Janeiro Chateau Crystale • 2517 S. Gessner @ Westheimer two teenage girls. When: Sunday ana When: Oct. 15 and 17 at When: Oct. 15 and 17 Doors Open: 2:00 • European Buffet Opens: 2:30 Monday at 8 p.m. 5 p.m. at 7 p.m. Performances Begin. 3:30 • Open Dancing Throughout Where: Rice Media Center Where: The MFAH Where: The MFAH More info: flamencohouston.com • 713.705.8701 res Page 11 THE RICE THRESHER Friday, October 7, 2005 Owls look for first win at East Carolina

by Adam Tabakin ... worthwhile. The hardest thing with a 24-21 victory over Duke but is to keep that kind of aggressive, has lost its last three games. Rice's THRESHER STAF F enthusiastic approach when you losing streak extends to last season With its three toughest games don't have a victory." and has reached nine games. The of the season complete, the football Rice (0-3, 0-1 Conference USA) Owls have also lost nine consecutive team hopes to get its first win Sat- is last among the 117 Division I-A road games, dating back to 2003. urday night in Greenville, North teams in defense, allowing 53 points Rice's schedule thus far has Carolina, against East Carolina and 522.3 yards per game. The Owls taken the team coast to coast. And University. have been outscored by an aver- Saturday's contest will be the Owls' "I feel all games we have to play age of 34 points per game, have a fourth straight road game, following from this point on are must-win," minus-seven turnover margin and the postponement of the scheduled redshirt freshman split end Jarett have not had a 100-yard rusher in Sept. 24 home opener against Navy Dillard said. any game. due to Hurricane Rita. Fortunately East Carolina (1-3, 0-1) is not an offensive juggernaut 'When you win and like UT, UCLA or UAB. The Owls are coming off a 45-26 loss to the 'All games we have to you have thai positive University of Alabama-Birming- play from this point on ham, while East Carolina lost 33-7 reinforcement with a last week to Southern Miss. are must-win.' The Pirates do have weapons, — Jarett Dillard victory, it makes... however. James Pinkney and Aun- Redshirt freshman split end everything you do during drae Allison have proven to be a formidable quarterback-receiver the week... worthwhile.' duo. Allison leads C-USA in receiv- ing, averaging eight catches and The Owls will finally play their — Ken Hatfield 116 yards per game, and the two home opener Oct. 15, facing Tulsa Head football coach have connected for four scores on in the first of three games in con- the year. secutive weeks at Rice Stadium. Dillard, a talented receiver in After this weekend, Rice has no Head coach Ken Hatfield said his own right, said while the Owls more plane trips — the team will tomorrow's contest is not a do-or- have never played the Pirates, the be able to travel on busses to face die game but is an important game process of preparing for the game SMU and UH next month. ADAM GINSBURG/THRESHEH nonetheless. remains the same. Junior bandit Chad Price said Sophomore midfielder Samantha Conn prepares to strike the bail in Rice's 2- "I don't think there is urgency "I don't think anybody is really the Owls need to play well on the 0 victory against Marshall Sunday. The Owls will go on the road to play Tulsa for us to have a victory, but I think road and at home. tonight at 7 p.m. and SMU Sunday at 1 p.m. familiar with what we're getting this team needs to have positive into, but it's just another football "We've got to learn to play at reinforcement," Hatfield said. team — we're going to do a scout- both places in order to win the "When you win and you have that ing report on them, and we're going conference," Price said. "Hope- Soccer heads to Tulsa, positive reinforcement with a vic- to play them just like we've been fully, we can get a couple of wins tory, it makes all the hard work and doing," Dillard said. under our belt to get our confidence everything you do during the week East Carolina opened its season back up." SMU this weekend Volleyball sweeps Tulane, falls to UTEP by Stephen Whitfield by two or fewer goals. This year's SMU squad — picked to win THRESHER EDITORIAL STAFF the C-USA title in the preseason by Shane Kotlarsky winning the first set convincingly, to be postponed. Tulane, which was The soccer team began its coaches' poll — has beaten No. 30-18. But Rice battled back to even playing only its fourth game of the FOR THE THRESHER first Conference USA season 27 Southern California and tied the score with a 30-24 second-set season due to Hurricane Katrina, with consecutive shutouts last No. 7 Pepperdine. After a lengthy road stint, the victory. UTEP won the next two gave the Owls a tough match despite weekend, beating East Carolina "We haven't beaten SMU volleyball team will open a three- highly contested games, which fea- falling in three games. University 3-0 and Marshall 2-0 to yet, and we want this year to be game homestand against Tulsa tured a combined 16 ties and 9 lead "Even though we won in three, it def- end its three-game losing streak. the first that we do that," Hus- (14-2,1-1 Conference USA) tonight changes. For the match, the Owls initely wasn't the easiest match we've The Owls will face two former ton said. "But our focus right at Autry Court. Both of Tulsa's com mitted just 26 hitting errors and played this season," Hoban said. rivals from the Western Athletic now is (playing) one game at a C-USA matches have been against hit .212. And despite having more Conference this weekend, travel- time. ... After we [play] Tulsa, Southern Methodist University, service aces than service errors for ing to Oklahoma to play the Uni- then we'll start to really focus on with both teams winning on their the first time this season, the team 'The way UTEP came versity of Tulsa at 7 p.m. tonight SMU. But I'm sure it's in the back respective home courts. Saturday, could not hold serve for more than and • hen heading to Dallas to play of all the girls' minds." the Owls will play host to SMU five consecutive points. out is the way every team Southern Methodist University Rice's first conference game (5-11, 1-1) at 7 p.m. "They controlled the momen- Sunday at 1 p.m. against East Carolina (6-7, tum," sophomore outside hitter is going to come out Rice (04, 2-0 C-USA) has lost 1-1 C-USA) was a tight contest Kristina Dennemann said. "Not all three of its road games this throughout. The Owls took a 1-0 'Not being able to being able to control momentum against us [—j ftfaying season, but two of those losses lead after redshirt freshman for- has really affected us, birt we're their best volleyball.' came against ranked opponents. ward Caitlin Robbins made four control momentum has looking to change that." Tulsa (5-5-2, 0-1 C-USA) is 4-1-1 Pirate defenders look silly with a The Miners, who moved from — Genny Volpe at home this season and has won succession of elusive moves be- really affected us, but the Western Athletic Conference to Head volleyball coach three of its last four games. Last fore eventually setting up sopho- C-USA with Rice, found a defensive year Rice beat Tulsa 1 -0 — also on more forward Clory Martin for we 're looking to change scheme to slow one of the most the road — but the Golden Hur- her first goal of the season in the that.' prolific players in C-USA, senior The youthful Rice team showed ricane went 5-2-1 after that game, 13th minute. Goals by freshman outside hitter Olaya Pazo. With progress in fixing the problems that narrowly losing to perennial WAC forward Anne Candee and sopho- — Kristina Dennemann Pazo the focus of UTEP's defensive have plagued the team throughout champion SMU in the conference more midfielder Lennie Waite late Sophomore outside hitter efforts, senior setter Kristina Ho- its non-conference schedule. The semifinals. in the second half ensured the 3-0 ban, junior middle blocker Tessa Owls cut down on errors while "We know what Tulsa's victory. Rice won thegame primar- Kuykendall and freshman outside effectively controlling momentum capable of," head coach Chris ily because its defense prevented Head coach Genny Volpe said hitter Karyn Morgan stepped up throughout the match. Huston said. "They came on really East Carolina from mounting she expects this weekend's op- with double-digit kills. Rice committed only five ser- strong last year.... In the tourna- any successful offensive attack. ponents to play as well as the Uni- "UTEPreally focused on [Pazo], vice errors in the match, tying the ment, we were hoping that they The Pirates only took one shot in versity of Texas-El Paso did while and they found a way to defend season-low they set against LSU did not win." the first half, and freshman goal- beating the Owls. her really well," Volpe said. "They earlier in the season, and attacked keeper Adriene Giese recorded SMU (7-3-1, 1-0 C-USA) has "The way UTEP came out is the always had a double [or] triple accurately throughout the match, four saves in the second half to dominated Rice in the past. The way every team is going to come block on her — they made it rather hitting .280. stop any potential rally. Owls are 0-6 all-time against th' out against us," Volpe said. "They're difficult for her to get a kill." "We were very efficient with Mustangs, including the k.st two The game against Marshall going to come out probably playing Rice began its C-USA schedule our serving," Volpe said "Our hit- WAC championship games, but (2-10,0-2 C-USA) was not as close their best volleyball." against Tulane (1-4, 0-2) in College ting efficiency was also strong. all six losses have been decided See SOCCER, page 13 UTEP (12-4, 2-2) came out Station Friday, after Hurricane Rita That was something we've been strong against the Owls in El Paso, caused the Owls' Sept 23-25 matches working on." 0WL00K - THE WEEK IN SPORTS

Friday 10/7 7 p.m. Volleyball vs. Tulsa (Autry Court) The football team has fallen to 0-3 with its most last year. But it doesn't matter how well the offense recent loss, a 46-25 drubbing at the hands of UAB. Rice's home debut of Conference USA season is per forming when the defense forces only one punt I'm pleased with the offense's performance. Jarett in three games. With that statistic. I'd be surprised Saturday 10/8 7 p.m. Volleyball vs. SMU (Autry Court) Dillard has just four fewer receptions in these first if we hadn't lost all three games. Tuesday 10/11 7 p.m. Volleyball vs. Sam Houston (Autry Court) three games than Rice's leading receiver had all of — S.C.W THE RICE THRESHER SPORTS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005 Upstart Jones stuns Wiess with fourth-quarter drive Hanson said. "We knew if they tried much fun it can be to play again," by Stephen Whitfield to lob it up she was the one we wanted Goodrich said. "Last year, people got THRESHER KDtTORIAl. STAFF out there. ... She had about three disillusioned. This year we care so The Jones Powderpuff team pulled chances [to intercept a pass], and she much, but we still have fun doing it. off the biggest upset of the young finally took one to the house." We're not super-intense to the point season Friday, beating Wiess 7-0 on Jones moved the ball quickly on [where] people get upset." a last-minute touchdown. lst-and-10, gaining 12 yards on a In other games, Lovett (2-2) run by sophomore halfback Theresa evened its record with an easy Ring. An incomplete pass by senior 25-12 victory over Brown (0-3). COLLEGE SPORTS quarterback Alex Paul and runs by Sid Richardson (3-0) won its 25th die Ring and Goodrich made it 4th-and-l consecutive game, beating Hanszen ROUNDUP at the Jones 47 with a minute and a (1-2) 25-0. Martel (4-0) has allowed half remaining in the game. Electing only seven points all season after The first quarter saw Jones (2- to go for it, Jones converted, as Ring defeating Baker (0-3) and Will Rice 1) punt twice and Wiess (2-1) fail ran for 6 yards. Three plays later, Paul (0-3) by 34-0 and 34-7 margins to post to capitalize on a 25-yard pass to completed a 52-yard pass to Goodrich its best-ever start. Wiess went on to sophomore receiver Anna Killgore on for a touchdown to give Jones a 7-0 beat Baker 27-0. its opening play from scrimmage. The lead with 28 seconds left. The Powderpuff schedule will second quarter consisted primarily of Wiess began its next drive with a resume Oct. 15 with a potentially a 16-play drive by Wiess that lasted 20-yard pass to Gwilliam. Two plays pivotal set of games. It will be an almost 11 minutes. Wiess advanced to later, Smith converted on third-and- important weekend for Martel, which rf Jones' 6-yard line before sophomore four with a 10-yard run, placing the has games against Jones and Sid. halfback Natalie Gwilliam was called ball on Jones' 29-yard line with 15 Martel head coach Brian Gibson led for a 15-yard hurdling penalty while seconds to go and no timeouts. On Sid to the Powderpuff title in 2003 diving into the end zone. Two plays the next play, Smith was tackled for before becoming a resident associate TAYLOR JOHNSON/THRESHER later, Jones sophomore defensive a six-yard loss, and Wiess was unable at Martel last year. Jones will also Wiess freshman running back Natalie Alderson looks for running room against back/halfback Caitlin Goodrich to run another play. face Will Rice Oct. 16. Wiess will play Will Rice Sept. 21. Wiess lost a heartbreaker to Jones 7-0 Friday and looks to intercepted a pass from Wiess junior Caram — a key contributor Lovett in a rematch of a semifinal rebound against Lovett, its 2004 semifinal opponent, Sunday at 1 p.m. quarterback Ali Smith to give Jones during Wiess' run to the Powderpuff game last season. The game of the the ball at its 10 with 1:12 remaining championship game last season— week will feature two teams looking in the half. Jones was unable to score was limited to 6 carries and 14 yards for their first win of the year, as Baker SPORTS NOTEBOOK on its subsequent drive, as time ran on the game because of a knee takes on Will Rice. out in the half with no score. injury. The offense relied mainly on The third quarter was Gwilliam, who rushed 17 times for Freshman Flag Football DiSesa battles at All- of one of the 16 qualifying spots marked by another long Wiess 91 yards. Smith threw only 9 passes, The Blue League season got for the main draw. possession—a 10-play, 45-yard drive completing 3 of them for 57 yards underway Friday, as defending American qualifier Senior Robert Searle will that ended after a fourth-down pass and 2 interceptions. Wiess held Jones champion Sid toppled Martel The women's tennis team had compete in the tournament as fell incomplete. Jones took over on to 137 yards of total offense on just 26-7 and ran its unbeaten streak to a strong outing at the Wake For- one of the 48 nationally-ranked its own 24 and gained 15 yards on 29 plays. eight games dating back to 2003. est Deacon Classic last weekend players allowed to bypass the its first two plays but, after a 15-yard Wiess defensive coordinator In the other league matchup. Will and continued to make waves qualifying rounds. As the 28th charging penalty and a 7-yard loss on Eddie Goodreau said he was pleased Rice extended its regular season during the week at the Riviera/ seed in the tournament, he will a botched shotgun snap, was forced with the team's defensive effort shutout streak to five games with ITA All-American Championship face Duke's Joey Atas in the first to punt from its own 9 early in the overall. a 28-0 romp over Baker. qualifying tournament in Pacific round of the main draw, which fourth quarter. "They had one play that got away In Gray league action, Jones Palisades, California. began Thursday and continues Wiess started its opening drive of from us," Goodreau, a sophomore, opened its season with a convincing In California, senior Blair DiS- through Sunday. He will also the fourth quarter from its own 42. said. "Other than that, I think we won 21-6 win over Wiess. esa lost to UCLA's 64th-ranked play alongside Harknett as part Gwilliam had runs of 16 and 11 yards pretty much the rest of the game, I .aura Gordon in Monday's open- of the 12th-seeded doubles team, early in the possession, and Wiess especially on defense. The defense Women's Basketball ing round, but recovered in the and the pair will face Stanford's appeared to be in a good position was holding everything and not The Eastern Conference opened next round to defeat Stanford's 13th-ranked K.C. Corkery and after a five-yard run by sophomore letting them go at all." play Monday with two awkward 79th-ranked Celia Durkin in three James Fade in the first round. halfback Bianca Caram placed the ball Friday's game marked Jones' games. GSA was a winner over Brown sets. She then defeated Minneso- 'Hie All-American is the first of on Jones's 35 with about five minutes second win of the season, equaling by forfeit, and Ixivett slaughtered ta's 86th-ranked Nischela Reddy three national men's tournaments remaining. However, Smith threw her its win total from all of last year, when Hanszen 43-8. to advance to the quarterfinals in the 2005-'()6 season, along with second interception of the game, this the team put u p a second consecutive Tuesday's Western Conference of the consolation draw, where the ITA National Indoor Cham- time to senior safety Jackie Matusko, sixth-place finish. Now, as Jones games were more competitive. Will she played UT's Kendra Strohn pionships in November and the giving Jones the ball at its own 20. eyes a playoff berth, Goodrich said Rice (1-1) earned its first win of the on Thursday. NCAA Championships in May. Jones defensive coordinator a victory against a perennial power season with a 44-33 victory over win less DiSesa is the only remaining Despite the qualifying-round Johnny Hanson, a senior, said he like Wiess will help the team's Martel (0-2). After falling to Sid (2-0) Owl competing in the All-Ameri- losses, the Owls have already was confident Matusko could make confidence. 52-11 inthefirstgameofadoubleheader, can, as sophomores Dominique surpassed their performance the key play. "It's just a huge morale boost Jones (1-1) rebounded to steal a close Karas and Kimberly Patenaude from last year, when Searle "We have a lot of faith in Jackie," because it shows everyone how 28-26 win from Wiess (1-1). lost in the pre-qualifying rounds was injured and no Rice player to unranked opponents. reached the main draw of the Should she advance, DiSesa All-American. could compete in the consolation — Dylan Farmer finals, scheduled for later today. At Wake Forest, sophomore Christine Dao took third place, and sophomore Tiffany Lee Hoffman leads golf took fifth in the A-flight singles bracket, and the two combined at Vanderbilt event for a 6-2 record. Dao rebounded For the second consecutive from a 6-0 first-set loss to defeat tournament, freshman Kaz Hoff- TennesseeTech's Marin Tasheva man led the golf team individu- in the second round but eventu- ally, finishing in a tie for 26th in ally lost to tournament runner-up a 64-player field with a five-over Jenna D>eb from Wake Forest. 221 at Vanderbilt University's In the second round, Lee lost to Mason Rudolph Intercollegiate eventual champion Rachel Del last weekend. Priore from the University of Vir- As a team, the Owls finished ginia 6-3,7-5, but won two straight 11th in the 12-team field. Al matches without dropping a set though tournament host Vander- to finish the tournament. bilt had the top two individuals — Dylan Farmer in the field, the Commodores finished fourth behind Virginia, Baylor and SMU. Searle and Harknett Senior Parker I^aBarge recov- NOTHING SIDE ABOUT IT. ered from his performance at the Falcon Invitational and finished to compete in Tulsa two strokes behind Hoffman in Two members of the men's a tie for 32nd. Freshman Kyle tennis team traveled to Tulsa, Kelley and sophomore Addison Okla last weekend to participate Awe tallied 11-over 227s for in the qualifying round of the ITA the tournament, tying for 43rd. All-American Tennis Champion- Sophomore Jeff Krakowiak ship at the University of Tulsa. rounded out the Owl contingent, On Saturday, senior Tony finishing one stroke behind Awe Haerle fell to Ohio State's 120th- and Kelley in a tie for 48th. Ckipotle ranked Brian Koniecko in straight Rice will return to the links sets, while junior Ben Harknett next week, as the Owls travel to overcame a one-set deficit to compete against regional rivals defeat Drew Kberly, also from including Baylor and Texas-San BEHOLD, OUR NEW SALAD. Ohio State. But Harknett lost to Antonio at the Baylor Invitational Florida State's Ytai Aboug/ir in Oct. 10-11 in Waco. FANNIN G DRYOEN the second round, falling short —Matt McCabe THE RICE THRESHER SPORTS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005 13 Football opens C-USA Daniels named C-USA Athlete of the Week

by Katy Miller In Stillwater, Okla. last week- and the goal is to get that to maybe end, the men's team placed fifth 45 seconds. In a big field, every IHRESHER STAFF season with 45-26 loss in the Cowboy Jamboree. Led once second is usually a place." The men's and women's cross again by senior Marcel Hewamu- Senior David Axel, who placed by Adam Tabakin touchdown, capped by a 19-yard run country teams each faced strong dalige, who finished in eighth 54th in last weekend's meet, said place, the men faced some of the THRESHER STAFF from Armstrong. While Armstrong was fields last weekend as the Owls Rice's Cowboy Jamboree results ineffective passing — completing 4 of competed in their last meets top programs in the nation, includ- were not representative of the The football team got off to another 11 passes for 45 yards and two intercep- before upcoming pre-national ing defending national champion team's full potential. poor start on the road in its Conference tions—he led the Owls in rushing with competition. Arkansas, which took both the team "It's not where we want to be, but USA debut Saturday, falling behind 93 yards on 16 carries as Rice's option The men's team will face yet an- and individual crowns. we're early in the season," he said. quickly to the University of Alabama- attack resulted in a season-high 267 other strong field at Pre-Nationals "I know that we're hoping for Pre- Birmingham and losing 45-26. rushing yards. Oct. 15 in Terre Haute, Ind. More Nationals to be a preview of the end "We missed a lot of tackles — we Landry'spoint-afterattempt missed, than half of the country's top 30 pro- ' We know we can of our season. We're really hoping didn't stop the big plays from happen- and the Owls did not get any closer grams are sending runners. Next to show that we're a national-caliber ing," junior bandit Chad Price said. than the 28-16 score. UAB added a weekend's race should provide a compete with all the team and that we deserve to be [at "Any time you let a team like that get third touchdown pass with 26 seconds measure of the squad's potential nationals] again." explosive plays, it's going to be pretty left in the first half, but the 19-point to achieve its season-long goal top guys no matter The women's team also had hard to come back." halftime deficit was an improvement of placing well in the conference, some strong finishes, while split Rice (0-3, 0-1 C-USA) allowed over 35- and 42-point halftime deficits regional and national meets. what type of day between meets at the University its opponent to score a touchdown against No. 20 UCLA and No. 2 Texas, "Weknowthatwe'regoingtogain of Notre Dame and Texas A&M on the game-opening drive for the respectively. experience — we're going to be in a we 're having.' University-Corpus Christi. third straight game. And sophomore Even though the Blazers played field with good people," head coach — Charles Hampton At the Notre Dame Invitational, quarterback Joel Armstrong threw most of their of fensive starters well into Jon Warren (Jones '88) said. "We're Sophomore cross country where the Owls ended in 13th the first of two interceptions on the the fourth quarter, the Owls tied UAB going to learn how to be in a big field runner place, Conference USA Athlete ensuing Rice drive, allowing UAB 10-10 in the second half. Rice has been and how to handle it If everybody is of the Week Marissa Daniels, a (3-1, 1-0) to open up a 14-0 lead the outscored just 33-27 in the second half 15-30 seconds quicker, that's a huge sophomore, finished in 15th place, Owls could not overcome. of its three games. amount of points." Sophomore Charles Hampton and senior Kate Gorry was 18 sec- Rice has been outscored 126-30 in "Probably the best thing you can Junior Pablo Solares, who finished 18th despite coping with onds behind in 41st. Senior Anna the first half of its games this season. say about us is in the second half we finished fourth among Rice run- an illness. Hampton said his strong Reeve finished 84th, followed by Head coach Ken Hatfield said the continued to fight, we continued to ners at last weekend's Oklahoma performance has positive implica- sophomores Callie Wells in 86th slow starts have crippled the Owls. adjust more to the speed and we made State Cowboy Jamboree, is look- tions for the rest of the season. and Laura Kelley in 115th. "We just need to come out of the some good stops," Hatfield said. "They ing forward to Pre-Nationals "]The meet] gave me confi- Bevan said he was pleased with chute early," Hatfield said. "We've got kept their offense in for a long time, as a potential preview of the dence that when I'm not feeling the team's results and prospects for to find a way to get ahead, stay ahead and we stopped them on a couple of postseason. my best I've got the training behind the rest of the season. and win the ballgame." screen passes and a couple of fourth- "It will be really fun to [ measure) me to still run well," Hampton said. "We could have run better, but Rice got on the board late in the first down situations. It would have been ourselves against nationally ranked "We know we can compete with all we beat seven [major] schools, and quarter with a 43-yard field goal from awfully easy to give up and to quit, but teams," he said. "We'll know where the top guys no matter what type we got out of it what we needed to," senior kicker Brennan Landry to cut we [didn't]." we are and what our chances [for of day we're having." he said. "[We gained] experience, UAB's lead to 14-3 before the Blazers UAB's star quarterback Darrell the postseason] are." Warren said he was pleased with and there's no way you can replicate and Owls traded touchdowns, with the Hackney threw for 339 yards and The women, like the men, hope Hewamudalige's and Hampton's that experience [in practice]." Rice score coming on a one-yard run two scores. Redshirt freshman cor- last weekend's experiences against individual performances, and that In Corpus Christi, the Owls fin- from junior fullback Andrew Cates for nerback Ja'Corey Shepherd, who tough opponents translate into suc- he hopes for better performances ished fifth among 15 teams, including his first career touchdown. has the Owls' only forced turnover cess against national competition from the other runners. LIT. Unlike the men at Stillwater, the this season, led Rice with 10 tackles Oct. 15. "Ourthird, fourth and fifth [run- women had no problem crossing the and a blocked field goal in his first "We got exposed to intense ners] are close [to each other], but finish line as a team. 'Any time you let a career start. competition [at Notre Dame Uni- we need to get the pack a lot closer "They had about a 25-second Other redshirt freshmen also con- versity]," head coach Jim Bevan to the second man," Warren said. pack time from our No. 1 to No. 5," team like [UAB] get tributed for the Owls. Quarterback said. "I think we're going to benefit "It's now over a minute from the Bevan said. "It was an outstanding Chase Clement went 5-7 for 53 yards, from that." No. 2 runner to the No. 3 runner, performance." explosive plays, its a touchdown and an interception, and receiver Jarett Dillard had five going to be pretty hard catches for 65yardsand a touchdown. to come back.' The two connected from 13 yards out with 3:04 left in the game for their — Chad Price first career passing and receiving Junior defensive back touchdowns, respectively. Dillard's five receptions were the most for an Owl since Marcus Battle caught five ttHwtt S »«m!SNl8 UAB found the end zone again on passes against Hawaii in 2003, and its fourth possession to make the score Dillard's 11 catches on the season 28-10, but after another Blazer intercep- are more than the rest of the team tion, the Rice defense finally forced UAB has combined. to go three-and-out. Redshirt freshman "I'm more experienced than I was cornerback Brandon King returned the for the UCLA game," Dillard said. punt 40 yards, the longest Owl punt "I was just as nervous for the UAB Owl Golf Tournament return since LaDouphyous McCalla game as I was for UCLA I've come a had a 52-yard return in 1998. long, long way, but the nervousness "1 was really pleased to see Brandon is always going to be there before King take the punt back 40 yards," the game." Hatfield said. "We have not had that Although Rice has taken itslumps in a while — an exciting punt returner early in the season, Price said he th who can make something happen, do thinks the experience the underclass- something on his own—and 1 thought men have had so far will ultimately Saturday, October 29 , 2005 that was one of the big pluses in the benefit them. ballgame." "Our inexperienced players are 'Hie Owls currently lead the nation getting experience they need," Price l oc ation: Clear Creek (»olf Course in punt return average thanks to King, said. "The teams we've played so far but his punt return was Rice's only one are top-level and probably [have] of the season, highlighting ongoing some of the best athletes that we'll see problems on defense. this year. If they get that experience Format: Four-person Scramble Rice capitalized on the good field early, down the road in the conference |M)sition by driving 53 yards forasecond they'll be better prepared." Tee times starting at 11:00am SOCCER From page 11 FKKS; as the score suggested. Rice scored Freshman midfielder Ashley Students: $15 Faculty/Staff: $20 first, when Robbins added her team- Lucas, who assisted on both goals leading fifth goal of the season in the Sunday, said the Owls' 2-0 start in 18th minute. Sophomore midfielder C-USA play — which leaves them REGISTRATION & FEE DEADLINE: Samantha Conn's fourth goal of the alone in first place, since SMU only ,h year put the Owls up 2-0 in the 29th played one game last weekend Monday, October 24 . 2INI5 minute, and the defense held firm — should show the other teams Rice after that. Rice maintained control is better than fourth place — where throughout the game, outshooting the Owls were picked to finish in the Register <>nline at «tin itUiamuralsports Marshall 2(5-4. Giese notched her coaches' poll. ft ruler "Forms'* Link) third shutout of the year on her way "It's very important to get a really to C-USA Defender of the Week good start in IC-USA1 to prove to honors. the other teams that... even though Huston said she is excited by we're ranked fourth coming into Giese's potential. [the season], we mean business," Phone: <7I3KM8-27^J !• mail: I Vise rkT.edu "She works so hard in practice Lucas said. "We can compete with that I think we're only going to see the best of the teams. We're here to her get better," Huston said. "She's prove ... we're not just one of those great athletically. She's amazing in other teams that [opponents] can play the goal." easy against." 14 THE RICE THRESHER SPORTS FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005

Oct 2,2006 — Rice Track/Soooer Stadium

BY THE Rice (64): Giese: Coralll, Barter, Martin, Droeger; Serrano, Fadool, Lucas; Candee. Robbins, C. Martin; 9 Substitutes: Brolan, Conn. Bellow, Wlttlg, Schaeffler, 1 sept.30-oct.2 Walte, Stanley, Seglem, Fraser. Marshall (1-9): Nordess; Burchett, Lizotte. Kot; White, Hey, Johnson, Gruber, Yeske, M. Lee; Jennings, Hollman; Substitutes: Wiese, Short, Hoover, Burdick, Hemmerich, Jackson, Provenzano, Jenkins, K. Lee.

Assists: Marshall: none; Rice: Lucas 2. Cautions: Bellow 76'. Ejections: none.

Rice MU Rice Shots 4 26 Shots on Goal 3 9 Saves 7 3 Corner Kicks 3 10 FOOTBALL Fouls 11 11 Offsides 1 3 RICE 26 UAB 48 Students! Attendance — 271 Oct. 1, 2005 — Legion Field, Birmingham, Ala. Do we have specials for you! UAB 14 21 0 10 45 RICE 34 EAST CAROUHA Rice 3 13 3 7 26 C. Martin 13' Candee 77'

UAB — White 4 run (Mullins kick) Waite 84' UAB — Burks 19 run (Mullins kick) RU — Landry 43 field goal Sept. 30,2005 — Rice Track/Soccer Stadium $7.38 Value Meals $8.30 Value Meals UAB — Cleveland 4 pass from Hackney (Mullins kick) RU — Cates 1 run (Landry kick) Attendance — 433 Large i-topping UAB — Lindsey 69 pass from Hackney (Mullins kick) Large Cheese or RU — Armstrong 19 run (kick failed) VOLLEYBALL #A1 #B1 pizza and three UAB — Rhodes 11 pass from Williams (Mullins kick) l-topping pizza RU — Landry 37 field goal UAB — Burks 7 run (Mullins kick) TEXAS-EL PASO 3 RICE 1 12~oz Cokes* UAB — Mullins 34 field goal Oct. 2, 2005 — Memorial Gym, El Paso, Tex. RU — Dillard 13 pass from Clement (Landry kick) Medium 1 topping Medium 3 topping UTEP 30 24 30 35 #A2 #B2 Final Stats RU UAB Rice 18 30 28 33 pizza and two pizza and two First Downs 27 25 Rushing Yards (net) 267 134 Final Stats UTEP Rice !2-oz Cokes* Passing Yards (net) 98 372 12-oz Cokes* 65 Total Yards 365 506 Kills 71 Return Yards 80 166 Errors 20 26 1 order of chicken Medium Cheese Punts - Avg. 1-0 1-52.0 Attempts 188 184 .212 Time of Possession 31:53 28:07 Attack Percentage .271 #A3 and an order of #B3 Pizza and 5 Buffalo Assists 60 63 10 Individual Stats Service Aces 5 Digs 79 82 Wings Rushing Cheesy Bread Blocks 10.5 10 0 Rice — Armstrong 16-93, Cates 12-48, Smith 6-38, Rucker 6-36, Clement 4-25, Henderson 4-21, Wall 3-6. Individual Stats West University UAB — Burks 12-78, Alexander 6-23, White 4-23, Kills For all your events, Drinkard 2-7, Williams 1-3, Hackney 4-1, Chaney 1-0, UTEP — Stacy 19, Peugh 18 Elliott l-<-l). Rice — Kuykendall 17, Pazo 16 (713) 523-7770 Passing Assists call for large-order Rice — Clement 5-7 1-53, Armstrong 4-11-2-45. UTEP — Smith 54 UAB — Hackney 24-33-0-339. Williams 3-3-0-33. Rice — Hoban 51 5733 Kirby Dr. Receiving Digs discounts! Rice — Dillard 5-65, Henderson 3-28, Aranda 1-5. UTEP — Stowers 21, Swift 17 Hour* 1! am to 2 am - 7 davs UAB — Lindsey 5-133, Drinkard 5-69, Cleveland 4-26, Rice — Dennemann 30, Kirk 16 Cook 3-65, Hampton J27, White 2-22, Rhodes 1-11, Attendance — 416 Burks 1-10, Coon 1-8, Tate 1-5, Chaney l-(-4).

Proud Sponsors of Your Rice Owls! Attendance — 10,580 TULANE 0 RICE 3 Sept. 30, 2005 — G Rollie White Coliseum College Station, Tex. C2004 Domino'* Putta LLC. Not valid with any other offer, aiid a? participating SOCCER store only Prices may vary Customer pays sales tax. Our drivers carry less Tulane 21 26 25 RICE 2-0 MARSHALL Rice 30 30 30 than $20. Delivery area limited to ensure safe delivery. Deep Dish Extra Robbins 18' Conn 29' Attendance —127

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THE RICE THRESHER CALENDAR FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005 15

ans, sex changes and beer... I'll music by Edvard Grieg. The ba- be there. ton goes up at 8 p.m. at Duncan If your Mardi Gras hangover Recital Hall. You know what's an Intelligent has worn off, head over to design? The new I Pod Nano Brown College for Margarita- ville from 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. in FRIDAY More intelligent, though, is the the Brown commons. FRIDAY 7 p.m. at Autry Court (Insert Rice American Civil Liberties 24 1 euphemism for "come cheer on Union hosting an open forum Balls to the wall your team or else" here] on intelligent design and the I'll take my graduate studies SUNDAY Women's soccer goes all out separation of church and state. with cheesesteak, please There's a whole Liszt of reasons 46 against Tulane at the Rice Rev. Belinda Williams speaks on Self-defense class Track/Soccer Stadium at 7 p.m. to come see this show the topic at 9 p.m. in Humanities The University of Pennsylvania Come out and cheer on the girls Building room 119. School of Engineering and The Rice chapter of the Ameri- Learn to defend yourself against in their pentultimate regular- Applied Science hosts a can Liszt Society invites Italian potential sexual violence. Rape season home game this year. graduate recruiting session. pianist Roberto Russo to play at Aggression Defense, a self- Event runs from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m. at Duncan Recital Hall. FRIDAY defense education open house, Last year, my roommate 3 p.m. in Duncan Hall 1044. The program includes works by 44 runs from 1 p.m. to 5 p.m. in screwed me and I liked It Schubert, Schumann, Scriabin Get dirty to beautify Rice Hanszen College classroom 207, Screw Yer Roommate starts and Scarlatti. Try saying that above the commons. The Center for the Study of tonight whenever you get your SATURDAY three times fast. 8 Environment and Society plants roomie in costume and into the wildflowers around campus What's blue and white and wet MONDAY quad for public mockery. Shirts this afternoon from 3:30 p.m. to all over? It's not the aftermath WEDNESDAY 47 go on sale this week and date dusk and tomorrow from of Hurricane Rita In Houston It was the best of times, It was ideas are on the Rice Program 42 8:30 a.m. to 12 p.m. Meet plant- Council Web site. Or, send an the worst of times ... The men's water polo team The greatest gifts of all: cheap ers and plants at the Circle e-mail to thresher-calendar®rice, hits the road for a tournament beer and solicitation Drive at the student center. Environmental policy expert edu for personalized sugges- at Texas A&M. Games against Senior Gift Pub Night kicks off Matthew Kahn speaks on tions ... just don't blame me if Texas A&M and University of the Class of 2006 senior gift H-Town showdown urban sustainability at 12 p.m. your roommate doesn't speak to Texas commence at 1 p.m. and at Farnsworth Pavilion. Lunch you the next morning. campaign at 10 p.m. tonight at Women's soccer takes the 8:30 p.m., respectively. Willy's Pub. Drink until you feel is provided but please RSVP to field against the University of [email protected] by Oct 14. generous, seniors. Then your Houston at 7 p.m. at the Rice Taming the Mustangs class can donate a really high- Track/Soccer Stadium. Come fallutin' bench. Women's volleyball stampedes cheer on the Owls as they take WEDNESDAY on their crosstown rivals. HOW TO SUBMIT Southern Methodist Univer- Yom Kippur 49 sity in its second C-USA home I'm ready for my close-tip, Mr. CALENDAR ITEMS game. The Owls serve it up at The 10th day of the year 5766 Fat... Friday? DeMllle 7 p.m. at Autry Court. in the Jewish calendar started Hanszen College throws Mardi Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m. at sundown yesterday, marking Gras from 10 p.m. to 2 a.m. in The Campanile holds this prior to Friday publication. the annual Day of Atonement. An offer you can't refuse the Hanszen commons. BYOB: semester's Picture Yourself Service times can be found at Bring your own beads. session for student groups who Submission methods: Celebrate the end of midterms http://www. houstonhillel. org. want to be memorialized. The and la dolce vita at the Houston event runs from 4:30 to Fax: Italian Festival today and tomor- SATURDAY 9:30 p.m. in the Grand Hall. (713) 348-5238 row. Italian cars, cuisine, culture THURSDAY E-mail: and concerts can all be found at 45 Proud to be a Norwei... [email protected] the Houston Farm and Ranch 43 Like homecoming, because Sexual Morality for Heathens Norwige ... Norwegea ... proud Campus Mall: Club, 1 Abercrombie Dr. football's been away so long to be from Norway Calendar Editor, Admission is $5; parking is $2. No, really, that's what the Rice football takes the field at Thresher, MS-524 lecture is called. Former Boston The Shepherd School puts Rice Stadium for the first time University philosophy profes- on the first of three concerts since Nov. 6, 2004. The game MONDAY sor Roger Scruton speaks on in celebration of 100 years of Submissions are printed on a against Tulsa kicks off at 3 p.m. sexuality, ethics and religion at Norway's independence. The space available basis. 40 Useless Rice football trivia will Why yes, Virginia, there Is still a 4 p.m. in Baker Hall. concert features Norwegian be here all week. tubist Oystein Baadsvik and midterm recess Little freshmen, little plays Contrary to the well-founded information from your friend's Wiess Tabletop Theater puts boyfriend's cousin, midterm on Freshman One-Acts tonight, recess was not cancelled in light tomorrow and Saturday. of the hurricane. There are no Performances begin at 8 p.m. The -HOUSTON'S classes today or tomorrow. in the Wiess College commons. Hazing of bad actors is not Pft.EMIEA.El TANNINE advised. EVPEPJENCEl! TUESDAY tannic Theater with a (lemon) twist 5UO Wau^K Drive 44 -Houston, TV TIOI9 ^ National Coming Out Day The Rice Players debut Wallace Shawn's Aunt Dan and Ismon Today is National Coming at 8 p.m. at Hamman Hall. Out Day, celebrating freedom Tickets are free and the show •.*/'<£ j Preservt -this ad -to receive of sexual expression. Sex. runs through Saturday. Freedom. Tolerance. Sex. Who doesn't need more of those? Pearls of wisdom Rice's GLBT organizations "J'jUSi -liMi 1 [Insert witty sports quip here] sponsor Debutante Balls, Scott Women's volleyball [insert Turner Schofield's performance sports-oriented action verb about coming out, at 7 p.m. at Featuring top of the line beds . . . here] Sam Houston State at Willy's Pub. Ball gowns, lesbi- COFFEEHOUSE S-Class Sunboard XTT Montego Bay (YOU KNOW WHERE WE ARE.) V-56 and great specials!

Mon-Th 830 AM-midnight SPCCIAI 1 •" iMontn °f Fri 830 AM-5 PM a .VOMITED Tannirweem k ' 81X30® Sun 8 PM-midnight Couples can ft* *9.99 join 2 VIP Memberships with only 1 Pec www.ruf.rice.edu/-coffee/ [email protected] Enrollment r^e°M Ml/ ESPRESSO. COFFEE. MIGHTY LEAF TEA. Fee f j when FREEZES. ITALIAN SODAS. WALLY a"""8

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MUFFINS. BAGELS. 20 SYRUP FLAVORS. PK: 1l3-5l8-11fcd Visrt us or\ tke wcr! Mon - fri: lata - 9pi* MUSIC. CUTE EMPLOYEES. AND MORE. <8 Pa*: 113-518-1161 vOWW.-t^-tanrMrv6SpOt»rvc.CO(V> Sat 4 Surv - 8pm 16 THE RICE THRESHER BACKPAGE FRIDAY, OCTOBER 7,2005

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the MOB, Not Funny FUNNY MATRIX SOUND€D A LOT FUNNIER/WHEN I FIRST THOUGHT OF IT She is holding pink anal beads Because of all the Backpage's midterms and Hollywood Gland This picture represents me pulling this week's Backpage Releases pheromones out of my ass. papers this week (and rejected Backpage ideas) that attract Hollywood the Backpage is phoning it in. Above is the Funny stars and starlets such Oedipus Complex: Matrix, where all the Backpage ideas come from. as Richard Gert aka, Lama Marria Unfortunately, the senior editor got to make his own Pancreas Produces The Visible Lama: marks before publication. I hate respect the need for enzymes that break Stomach; Often fitted with down all sorts of proper censorship editing. Over there is something Laman Raman when up late $ee jfe grOSS innards Of the digestaWe foods left over from the Dalai Lama Backpage. Enjoy. Plus, WTF? The first time I don't have a Backpage that Tibetan spiritual leader would be great with color, and we get color. Inner Peace Outer Peace [email protected] CLASSIFIEDS (713) 348-3974

HELP WANTED NEED TRUSTWORTHY animal lover to ON CAMPUS SAT tutor needed for EDITOR NEEDED for management LOOKING FOR a babysitter 18+for a sit for my dog Sunday night until Thurs- senior high school student, ASAP. of material for online student forum. 3.5 year-old-boy. (713) 680-0800. TUTOR FROM YOUR room. Do day night until end of December. Need Two days a week, flexible. E-mail Minimal time commitment; well paid. homework; talk on the phone; watch the sitter to walk Angus in the morning to: [email protected], (713) 240-5840 Contact [email protected]. HOUSING TV until a student logs on and needs and evenings. Galleria area. Contact (cell). help. Easy online interface, PC re- [email protected] or (713) 4804522. PART-TIME SITTER needed for 7 MUSEUM DISTRICT. Grad students quired. Minimum six hours per week SATURDAY NIGHT babysitter. and 11 year-old-girls, Mon. and Wed., - don't live in the lab. One-bedroom required. Flexible hours 2 p.m.-12 a.m. DOWNTOWN LAW FIRM looking for Galleria area family with two young 3:15-8:30, and occasional Thurs. until apartment in quiet building at 4001 Sun.-Thurs. Starting at $6 per hour. E- assistant. Fax resume to (713) 659-5556 children looking for friendly, loving 7 p.m. Must be friendly, responsible, Greeley. Hardwood floors, great closet mail [email protected]. or e-mail [email protected]. Some Sat. night/weekend hours babysitter. have a reliable vehicle and clean driving space, window unit air, on-site laundry. computer knowledge required. References and experience required. record. Call Kathy (713) 434-2512. $525 with lease and deposit. Andover: PART-TIME ASSISTANT needed (713) 627-1680. (713) 524-3344. Tues. and Thurs. Very articulate, good TUTORS WANTED. Learning Squared P/T NANNY WEST U Area Mon.- phone voice, good computer skills. $9 needs tutors for mathematics, chem- BARTENDERS WANTED! $250 per Fri. or Tues./Thurs. or MWF from MUSEUM DISTRICT. One-bedroom per hour! Call: (800) 352-3395. istry, physics, biology, Spanish and day potential. No experience neces- 2:30-8:00. Responsible, experienced, apartments in an updated 60s building at economics. Good pay. Flexible hours. sary. Training provided. Age 18+ OK. references, like kids, clean driving 1301 Richmond. Hardwood floors, central WEBMASTER NEEDED. $20 per Office close to campus. No house calls. (800) 965-6520 ext. 289. record.Call Debbie (832) 368-9142 or air and heat and dishwashers in most hour. Inquire for more information: (713) 528-7085. dzager@houston. rr.com. units. Bike to Rice. $540-780 with lease [email protected]. CONTEMPORARY ART gallery look- and deposit. Andover (713) 524-3344. ing for energetic, reliable assistant. NEED HOMEWORK/STUDY tutor Hours of die gallery are Wed. - Sat, for two children in 8th and 2nd grades. MISCELLANEOUS 11:30-5:30. Part-time available. E-mail 5-8 hours minimum commitment resume to [email protected] or per week. Additional hours definitely EGG DONORS needed to help infer- call Amanda at (713) 880-5553 for more available - Flexible! Very close to tile couples. Work with experienced information. Rice Campus. Contact Kendall at agency. $5,000 compensation/cycle. kjknaus@sbcglobal. net. Monitoring in Medical Center. Age SEEKING KID-LOVING babysitter. 18-31, healthy with normal reproductive Mature and responsible person to MATURE, RELIABLE and enthusi- cycles, nonsmoker, intelligent, attrac- WILLY'S PUB transport six-year-old boy and fifth astic student needed from 3-8 p.m., tive. (866) 517-7513 or (713) 532-0664. Est. 1975 grade girl from school and watch Mon. Mon.-Thurs., to assist family with Ask for Renee or Catherine. - Fri. afternoons from 2:30-6:30. Call four children, ages 11-13. Duties (713) 202-6262 or (281) 822-0272. include driving to and from school SPRING BREAK 2006 with Student and afterschool activities and home- Happenings at the PUB Travel Services to Jamaica, Mexico, NEEDED: MOTHER'S HELPER work assistance. Must have excellent Bahamas and Florida. Are you con- for the week of 10/10/05 for children (ages 9, 10 and 12) for driving record and character refer- nected? Sell trips, earn cash and travel transport to activities, childcare and ences. If interested, please e-mail free! Call for group discounts. Info/ Monday 10/10 CLOSED FOR FALL BREAK homework help four to five after- [email protected]. Reservations (800) 648-4849. noons a week. Inside the Loop not far Tuesday 10/11 CLOSED FOR FALL BREAK from Rice. You will need references PROGRAMMER NEEDED for small CREDO"SCORE SUCCESS. Get CRED- and reliable transportation. $12 per project. Java-experience required. UCATED! Learn the unknown secrets to hour, contact Ixiura at (713) 524-3344 $100 for plugging in code. Contact your credit score success and get a FREE Wednesday 10/12 SENIOR GIVING NIGHT' (daytime). [email protected]. CD at www.FICOSUCCESS.com. Trtvla Competition 11pm-midnight ALUMS IN HEIGHTS seek babysitter Thursday 10/13 Hometown Team Pub Night! for 18-month-old boy. At least one Fri. Wear your favorite jersey and get in FREE! and Sat. per month. Experience, refer- The Rice Thresher ences and transportation required. $8 CLASSIFIED ADS Attn: Classifieds per hour. Stephanie (713) 869-7336 or Rates are as follows: 6100 Main St., MS-524 syankou>[email protected]. 1-35 words: $15 Houston, TX 77005-1892 36-70 words: $30 BABYSriTER WANTED: Neighbor- Phone: (713) 348-3974 71-105 words: $45 Don't go home hungry!! hood family seeking babysitter to call Fax: (713) 348-5238 for occasional evenings out. We have Cash, check or credit card pay The Thresher reserves the right EAT PIZZA, SUBS, & BAR FOOD two children, ages 6 and 4, and we ment must accompany your ad. to refuse any advertising for live four blocks from campus. Refer- any reason and does not take We are open 'til 1am Mondays and ences required; please call Louisa, Deadline is Monday at 5 p.m. responsibility for the factual 'til 2am Tuesday - Thursday (713) 522-2011. prior to Friday publication. content of any ad.