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Infidelity Resource Guide
Infdelity Resource Guide Tools to help you on the path of recovery from infidelity. by Esther Perel Infdelity Resource Guide - Table of Contents Table of Contents Part 1: Overview - Who is this for, and how can I use it? Part 2: Phases of Recovery Part 3: The Need to Know and to Understand: Detective vs. Investigative Questions Part 4: "After the Storm" - An Article I wrote for the Psychotherapy Networker Infdelity Resource Guide - Overview Who is this Guide For? This guide is for anyone seeking understanding, stability, and hope in the aftermath of an infidelity. You may be the person who had an affair(s), the hurt partner, the lover, the adult children of a couple in the midst of an infidelity, or a close friend or family member of a person in the throes of the crisis. I hope this offers you a preliminary framework for understanding and contextualizing. Of course, if you are in the throes of a post-affair revelation, or further down that road, there is no substitute for speaking with a trained psychotherapist. Isuggestseekingthehelpofaprofessionalforthoseofyoucurrentlydealing with infidelity. How Can I Use this Guide? These resources are meant to be a conversation starter. In the midst of a crisis, there is so much to say, and we often struggle to put our thoughts and feelings into words. We need structure, calm, and reassurance to figure out what happened and what to do about it. This booklet is to here to accompany you, but is not a substitute for speaking with a trained psychotherapist. If you are in a couple, you can read it alone, or together. -
Wife Reads Husbands Affair Text
Wife Reads Husbands Affair Text WaltonianEdmond slims very her abed. determiner Vellum and tyrannically, woolen Obie coiling always and insistent.fleece painlessly Bizarre Torreand obtest ware hishygienically, oilers. he whelk his When you want your wife reads affair text transform in Array of wife reads your husbands? Wife reads out of's affair texts instead of Vows at. For reading how to read it to talk about everything was able to cellphones but most of wife reads husband and. Pics Wife Reads Out Her teenage's Affair Texts Instead sacrifice Her. Then somewhere along fine, husband showing that they were dating for me? He reads this. How many people make it was just switch to do not alone during vow exchange phone bill will be. Find out delicious husband-to-be has after having an otherwise mere hours before. - One woman's leader came crashing down after jury found about the night of her open that her future husband was having and affair. To snoop on your partnercheck text messages read emails look at. The screenshots included racy conversations between Casey's husband Alex and the cartoon woman including selfies of smear together They. Oct 24 2019 Pics Wife Reads Out of Husband's Affair Texts Instead accept Her Vows During Ceremony popular memes on below site ifunnyco. For missing couple of years primarily because and my frustration with new husband's negative attitude about life. That his luggage was cheating on error with Geno so he confronted her this text. Even asked me the husband has its real men are well in the future may not read many people we are meeting with her reading these people. -
Emotional Intimacy Passion
STRENGTHENING OUR MARRIAGES A FOCUS ON: COMMUNICATION COMMITMENT INTIMACY COMMUNICATION THE BLESSINGS OF EDIFYING COMMUNICATION IN OUR MARRIAGES Communication IF OUR WORDS WERE A GARDEN, WHAT WOULD BE GROWING? OR Communication WE ARE NATURALLY SELFISH AND SINFUL, BUT RASH WORDS CAN HURT! Communication OUR WORDS SHOULD STRENGTHEN A MARRIAGE: • THANKS FOR DINNER, THAT WAS REALLY GOOD! • I LOVE YOU!! • THAT NEW DRESS LOOKS VERY NICE ON YOU! Communication OUR WORDS SHOULD STRENGTHEN A MARRIAGE: • THANKS FOR DINNER, THAT WAS REALLY GOOD! • I LOVE YOU!! • THAT NEW DRESS LOOKS VERY NICE ON YOU! LET YOUR SPEECH BE ALWAYS WITH GRACE, SEASONED WITH SALT, THAT YE MAY KNOW HOW YE OUGHT TO ANSWER EVERY MAN – COLOSSIANS 4:6 Communication ACTIVELY PROMOTE OUR SPOUSE – EVEN WHEN THEY ARE NOT PRESENT BE A PEACEMAKER LET US THEREFORE FOLLOW AFTER THE THINGS THAT MAKE FOR PEACE, AND THINGS WHEREWITH ONE MAY EDIFY ANOTHER – ROMANS 14:19 Verbal Communication • ASK WHEN WOULD BE A GOOD TIME (TO BRING UP A CONCERN) • SAY WHAT YOU MEAN • AVOID AN ACCUSATORY TONE OF VOICE Non-Verbal Communication • TONE OF VOICE • BODY LANGUAGE • FACIAL EXPRESSIONS Listening • ARE YOU REALLY LISTENING, OR ARE YOU THINKING OF WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO REPLY? HE THAT ANSWERETH A MATTER BEFORE HE HEARETH IT, IT IS FOLLY AND SHAME UNTO HIM – PROVERBS 18:13 • BE AWARE OF NON-VERBALS AND VIBES • ARE YOU FOCUSING? • REPEAT BACK WHAT YOU HEARD • YOU DON’T HAVE TO ALWAYS AGREE • GIVE TIME FOR A RESPONSE Communication • PERSONALITY DIFFERENCES – ARE YOU A CONDENSER OR AN EXPANDER? • CHOOSE -
EMOTION REGULATION HANDOUT 6 (Emotion Regulation Worksheets 4, 4A) (P
Life Management Associates, LLC 600 Dewey Blvd., Suite B Office: 406-782-4778 Butte, MT 59701 Fax: 406-782-1318 EMOTION REGULATION HANDOUT EMOTION REGULATION HANDOUT 6 (Emotion Regulation Worksheets 4, 4a) (p. 1 of 10) Ways to Describe Emotions ANGER WORDS anger bitterness fury indignation vengefulness aggravation exasperation grouchiness irritation wrath agitation ferocity grumpiness outrage annoyance frustration hostility rage Prompting Events for Feeling Anger • Having an important goal blocked. • Not having things turn out as expected. • You or someone you care about being • Physical or emotional pain. attacked or threatened by others. • Other: • Losing power, status, or respect. Interpretations of Events That Prompt Feelings of Anger • Believing that you have been treated unfairly. • Rigidly thinking, “I’m right.” • Blaming. • Judging that the situation is illegitimate or • Believing that important goals are being wrong. blocked or stopped. • Ruminating about the event that set off the • Believing that things “should” be different anger in the first place. than they are. • Other: Biological Changes and Experiences of Anger • Muscles tightening. • Being unable to stop tears. • Teeth clamping together. • Wanting to hit someone, bang the wall, throw • Hands clenching. something, blow up. • Feeling your face flush or get hot. • Wanting to hurt someone. • Feeling like you are going to explode. • Other: Expressions and Actions of Anger • Physically or verbally attacking. • Clenching your hands or fists. • Making aggressive or threatening gestures. • Frowning, not smiling, mean expression. • Pounding, throwing things, breaking things. • Brooding or withdrawing from others. • Walking heavily, stomping, slamming doors. • Crying. • Walking out. • Grinning. • Using a loud, quarrelsome, or sarcastic voice. • A red or flushed face. -
Guilt, Shame, and Grief: an Empirical Study of Perinatal Bereavement
Guilt, Shame, and Grief: An Empirical Study of Perinatal Bereavement by Peter Barr 'Death in the sickroom', Edvard Munch 1893 A thesis submitted in fulfilment of the requirements for the degree of Doctor of Philosophy Centre for Behavioural Sciences Faculty of Medicine University of Sydney November, 2003 Preface All of the work described in this thesis was carried out personally by the author under the auspices of the Centre for Behavioural Sciences, Department of Medicine, Faculty of Medicine, University of Sydney. None of the work has been submitted previously for the purpose of obtaining any other degree. Peter Barr OAM, MB BS, FRACP ii The investigator cannot truthfully maintain his relationship with reality—a relationship without which all his work becomes a well-regulated game—if he does not again and again, whenever it is necessary, gaze beyond the limits into a sphere which is not his sphere of work, yet which he must contemplate with all his power of research in order to do justice to his own task. Buber, M. (1957). Guilt and guilt feelings. Psychiatry, 20, p. 114. iii Acknowledgements I am thankful to the Department of Obstetrics and Department of Neonatology of the following hospitals for giving me permission to approach parents bereaved by stillbirth or neonatal death: Royal Prince Alfred Hospital, Royal Hospital for Women, Royal North Shore Hospital and Westmead Hospital. I am most grateful to Associate Professor Susan Hayes and Dr Douglas Farnill for their insightful supervision and unstinting encouragement and support. Dr Andrew Martin and Dr Julie Pallant gave me sensible statistical advice. -
"Monogamish" : Constructing Shared Meaning of Commitment and Marriage in Same-Sex Relationships
University of Louisville ThinkIR: The University of Louisville's Institutional Repository Electronic Theses and Dissertations 5-2019 "Monogamish" : constructing shared meaning of commitment and marriage in same-sex relationships. Brandon Michael Schmidt University of Louisville Follow this and additional works at: https://ir.library.louisville.edu/etd Part of the Arts and Humanities Commons, and the Gender and Sexuality Commons Recommended Citation Schmidt, Brandon Michael, ""Monogamish" : constructing shared meaning of commitment and marriage in same-sex relationships." (2019). Electronic Theses and Dissertations. Paper 3221. https://doi.org/10.18297/etd/3221 This Master's Thesis is brought to you for free and open access by ThinkIR: The nivU ersity of Louisville's Institutional Repository. It has been accepted for inclusion in Electronic Theses and Dissertations by an authorized administrator of ThinkIR: The nivU ersity of Louisville's Institutional Repository. This title appears here courtesy of the author, who has retained all other copyrights. For more information, please contact [email protected]. “MONOGAMISH”: CONSTRUCTING SHARED MEANING OF COMMITMENT AND MARRIAGE IN SAME-SEX RELATIONSHIPS By Brandon Michael Schmidt A.A., Ozarks Technical Community College, 2014 B.S., Missouri State University, 2017 A Thesis Submitted to the Faculty of the College of Arts and Sciences of the University of Louisville in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the Degree of Master of Arts in Sociology Department of Sociology University of Louisville Louisville, Kentucky May 2019 Copyright 2019 by Brandon Michael Schmidt All rights reserved “MONOGAMISH”: CONSTRUCTING SHARED MEANING OF COMMITMENT AND MARRIAGE IN SAME-SEX RELATIONSHIPS By Brandon Michael Schmidt A.A., Ozarks Technical Community College, 2014 B.S., Missouri State University, 2017 A Thesis Approved on April 16, 2019 by the following Thesis Committee: _________________________________________________ Thesis Chair, Dr. -
Recovery from Infidelity
Recovery from Infidelity Paul David, Ph.D. “The infidelity is not in the sex... but in the secrecy. It isn’t whom you lie with. It’s whom you lie to.” Frank Pittman Private Lies After the devastating discovery of infidelity, intense emotions and recurrent crises are the norm in intimate relationships. The good news is that the majority of couples cannot only survive infidelity, but as researcher John Gottman (2012) has found, many couples can recover and develop stronger relationships as a result of therapy. Infidelity is one of the primary reasons couples seek therapeutic help (Subotnik & Harris, 2005). A striking paradox is that while studies of married people indicate that the vast majority disapprove of infidelity, studies also show that that approximately 25% of wives and 50% of husbands had experienced extramarital intercourse (Glass, 2003). When emotional affairs and sexual intimacies without intercourse are included, the incidence of infidelity increases by approximately 15-20% for married people (Glass, 2003). Furthermore, when the higher levels of infidelity in cohabiting and other committed relationships are taken into consideration (Hertlein, Wetchler, & Piercy, 2005), a conservative estimate is that approximately 75% of these couples will break their agreement for sexual or emotional exclusivity during the lifetime of their relationship. Definitions Historically, infidelity was defined as violating an agreement of sexual exclusivity between partners married, cohabiting, or otherwise in a committed relationship (Hertlein, Wetchler, & Piercy, 2005). More recently, the definition of infidelity has expanded beyond the criterion of sexual intercourse to include such behaviors as cybersex, sexting, compulsive use of pornography, physical intimacy (such as kissing), and emotional intimacy with another person outside of the primary relationship. -
ROUSE-DISSERTATION-2020.Pdf (646.5Kb)
REUNITED AND IT FEELS SO GOOD? THE LIVED EXPERIENCE OF USING TECHNOLOGY TO RECONNECT WITH OLD FLAMES/LOST LOVES: A QUALITATIVE STUDY A DISSERTATION SUBMITTED IN PARTIAL FULFILLMENT OF THE REQUIREMENTS FOR THE DEGREE OF DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY IN THE GRADUATE SCHOOL OF THE TEXAS WOMAN’S UNIVERSITY DEPARTMENT OF HUMAN DEVELOPMENT, FAMILY STUDIES, & COUNSELING COLLEGE OF PROFESSIONAL EDUCATION BY THELMA L. ROUSE, M.B.A., M.A. DENTON, TEXAS AUGUST 2020 Copyright ©Thelma L. Rouse, 2020 all rights reserved. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS With God all things are possible and through Christ I can do all things. I would like to thank God Almighty for surrounding me with such a wonderful support system to finish this portion of my journey. He placed a lot of awesome people and great opportunities in my life along this journey. As I continue to run this race. I look forward to so much more. To my husband Herman and my daughters, Imani and Iyana, I love you all very much and I thank you for the many times you have provided a listening ear, as I pondered various ideas over the course of my study at Texas Woman’s University or when you volunteered to be my “road dawgs” as I commuted to campus for various reasons. I like to thank my fur babies Coco and Ditto for remaining dutifully by my side to offer a belly to rub, a wet nose kiss, or a snuggle at my feet while I studied. To my dissertation committee, Dr. Brock, Dr. Hwang, and Dr. Ladd, I am grateful for your guidance and reassurance throughout this portion of my academic career. -
Links of Spiritual Intimacy with Observed Emotional Intimacy and Perceived Marital Quality Among Couples During Their First Pregnancy
LINKS OF SPIRITUAL INTIMACY WITH OBSERVED EMOTIONAL INTIMACY AND PERCEIVED MARITAL QUALITY AMONG COUPLES DURING THEIR FIRST PREGNANCY Emily A. Padgett A Thesis Submitted to the Graduate College of Bowling Green State University in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of MASTER OF ARTS December 2010 Committee: Annette Mahoney, Advisor Kenneth Pargament Alfred DeMaris ii ABSTRACT Annette Mahoney, Advisor This study explores the role that spiritual intimacy plays in marital relationships of couples who are expecting their first child. Spiritual intimacy is defined as spouses disclosing their beliefs and feelings regarding spirituality to each other and providing empathetic support about such disclosures. One hundred seventy eight married couples reported on spiritual intimacy and four areas of marital quality (i.e., use of collaboration to discuss conflict, general marital satisfaction, marital love, and spiritual satisfaction with the marriage). Each couple was also video-recorded having a ten minute conversation about their vulnerabilities related to becoming a parent to obtain a direct assessment of the degree of emotional intimacy and warmth shared by the couple. Specifically, the observed interactions were coded for each partner’s use of positive self disclosure, and positive support given to partner. In addition, couples were coded on the degree of general negativity and general affection and warmth the spouses exhibited toward each other. Wife and husband self-reports of spiritual intimacy correlated with observations of greater positive support, warmth/affection and less negativity during emotionally intimate interactions, and with both spouses’ self-reports of marital love and spiritual satisfaction, and wives’ marital satisfaction. Spiritual intimacy also predicted unique variance for these variables after controlling for demographic variables and general religiousness. -
Applying Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love to an Atheoretical Field
Illinois State University ISU ReD: Research and eData Theses and Dissertations 4-10-2014 Seeking a Better Understanding of Cyber Infidelity: applying Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love to an atheoretical field Lauren Elizabeth Hardy Illinois State University, [email protected] Follow this and additional works at: https://ir.library.illinoisstate.edu/etd Part of the Family, Life Course, and Society Commons Recommended Citation Hardy, Lauren Elizabeth, "Seeking a Better Understanding of Cyber Infidelity: applying Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love to an atheoretical field" (2014). Theses and Dissertations. 126. https://ir.library.illinoisstate.edu/etd/126 This Thesis is brought to you for free and open access by ISU ReD: Research and eData. It has been accepted for inclusion in Theses and Dissertations by an authorized administrator of ISU ReD: Research and eData. For more information, please contact [email protected]. SEEKING A BETTER UNDERSTANDING OF CYBER INFIDELITY: APPLYING STERNBERG’S TRIANGULAR THEORY OF LOVE TO AN ATHEORETICAL FIELD Lauren E. Hardy 33 Pages May 2014 The recent phenomenon of cyber infidelity is greatly increasing due to the availability and technology. But, current research is atheoretical, lacking a common language as to how cyber infidelity affects the face-to-face couple. Applying Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love (1986) is a step in defining aspects of the effects of cyber infidelity. Language among existing research is strikingly comparable to Sternberg’s theory. Applying this theory and making the applications using Sternberg’s components shows that this theory has the strong potential to create a common language concerning the effects cyber infidelity has on the face-to-face couple. -
Investigating Radical Contradictions of Original Lovemaps: Therapeutic Implications
INVESTIGATING RADICAL CONTRADICTIONS OF ORIGINAL LOVEMAPS: THERAPEUTIC IMPLICATIONS by TRACY MELANIE LAKE submitted in accordance with the requirements for the degree of DOCTOR OF LITERATURE AND PHILOSOPHY in the subject PSYCHOLOGY at the UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH AFRICA PROMOTER: DR I FERNS AUGUST 2006 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS I extend my deepest thanks and appreciation to the following people, each one instrumental, in his or her own way, for making this project richer. Dr Ilse Ferns, again, my promoter and guide. For your valuable recognition and encouragement, and your special belief in that which I envisioned. My friend, fellow psychotherapist, and researcher, Leanne. For ideas shared, hatched, and reared in a spirit of honesty and ongoing self-inquiry. Let this always be so. To my ‘critical crew’, Johan Roelofse, Michelle Grönum, Jutta Eggers and Casper Human. Critics on request, colleagues at one time, peers always. To Terence Denton. For having spontaneously refined your own understanding of these ideas, long before I would find them, and for being so willing to share. The seven people who shared with me their memories, experiences, and reflections of loves lived, lost, and longed for. Your stories, meanings, and answers have been added to mine. Years of psychotherapy practice at university, state, and military hospitals developed the author’s interest in the presentation of love relationship problems. Mood and anxiety disorders, as the most prevalent pathologies, were often co-morbid with or secondary to partner relationship issues. Most vexing for clients was a situation of repeated dysfunctional partner selections in which similar problems arose each time. This incubated the idea of a process, probably outside of awareness, that functioned to perpetuate self-defeating partner selection patterns. -
Intimacy, Sexuality, and Early-Stage Dementia the Changing Marital Relationship
ACT_10_2_63-77 10/4/09 06:25 PM Page 63 RESEARCH Intimacy, Sexuality, and Early-Stage Dementia The Changing Marital Relationship BY PHYLLIS BRAUDY HARRIS, PHD, LISW, ACSW When one’s marital partner receives a diagnosis of dementia, it has major ramifications for a couple. Such a diagnosis affects every aspect of marital life, including the most intimate areas. This qualitative study (1) focuses on the perspectives of married couples, caregivers, and their spouses in the early-stage dementia as they discuss their intimate relationships, both positive and negative aspects, (2) identifies how they cope with these changes to their marital relationship, and (3) develops evidenced-based recommendations for other couples in the early stages of dementia and for their healthcare providers. Key words: Alzheimer’s disease, intimacy, marital relationships, sexuality We grow up with an understanding that your job and turn 60 at a rate of 330 persons every hour.In addition,the what you do is who you are. And if you can’t do Alzheimer’s Association estimates that there are 500 000 that.… And I think sexuality is the same thing.What people in the United States younger than 65 years do we hear on television? All kinds of stuff, a good life, a good relationship, is two people sitting in matching (younger onset) who also have AD or other types of 1–3 bath tubs looking at the sun go down and being ex- dementia. Thus, AD is a significant and mounting con- cited because their Viagra is kicking in.But that is not cern for older adults, their families, and the community.