The CordThe tie that binds since 1926 Weekly

PROF: BE LAZY CUTTING THE BULL Dr. Don Morgenson on why The top 10 things you really students need to just take it easy need to know about first year ...OPINION, PAGE 12 ...FEATURES, PAGES 14-15

Volume 46 Issue 2 FROSH MAILER 2005 www.clublaurier.ca Smoking action stalled WLU administration will wait another year to devise a plan to enact a campus-wide smoking ban

DAN POLISCHUK While students, staff and faculty News Editor were all able to vote, the legitima- cy of the referendum has become Plans to implement a campus- a topic of debate since it was wide smoking ban at Laurier posed during final exams. beginning this September have The question itself - do you sup- stalled as WLU President Robert port a smoke-free campus? - Rosehart has decided to table any received approximately 75 percent prohibition for at least a year. support from over 2000 voters. This comes after no strategic With no plan in place, Rosehart plan was forwarded to him by the has decided to take a year to implementation committee "broaden" the implementation before their deadline at the end of committee by including more stu- May dent representatives to help come The issue of completely elimi- up with new strategies. Jordan Jocius nating smoking on campus first PEDDLIN' PRESIDENTS - WLU President Bob Rosehart eats a hot dog while WLUSU President Dan Robert peddles arose when an online referendum Please see SMOKING, page 2 a lazy-boy bicycle in front of the Aird Underpass on Friday, June 10, 2005 for the National Commuter question was posed to the Laurier Challenge. For more on your campus leaders, read what they have to say about first-year students in NEWS, PAGE 3. community in mid-April. Editoriol reaction to this story in OPINION, PAGE 8 A Cord Weekly exclusive Laurier student drowns Well-liked teenager's body found after desperate search

ADRIAN MA police in hopes of finding him. News Editor York region police believe the death to be accidental, and noted After four days of desperate that alcohol was definitely con- searching, on May 26 the body of sumed at the party Ryan was last missing Laurier student Ryan seen at. Bartley was found in the Both family and friends from Maskinonge River, sending his Keswick and Waterloo attended hometown of Keswick and the his funeral service held in early Laurier community into shock June. Present at the service that and sadness. day was Laurier's Dean of Students Bartley, 19 years old, was last David McMurray. seen in the early of Jordan Jocius morning May Dean McMurray fondly remem- one - 22 making his way from house PANIC STRICKEN Bystanders apply pressure to the wounds of an bers Ryan as a vibrant and charis- to When he was not unidentified male after he was stabbed at a local keg party. party another. matic individual, and recalls the heard from again, an official first time Ryan introduced himself search was organized that saw to the Dean of Students. more than 400 volunteers assisting Students witness Please see BARTLEY, page 2 keg party stabbing This is a newspaper DAN POLISCHUK As they were about to leave the News Editor party around 12:30am, they that enjoys editorial independence publication in the city. Before this noticed two individuals having a from its student government and campus was even known as Wilfrid In the early morning hours of verbal argument in the yard. The university administration. That Laurier University, The Cord was Sunday June 26, a bustling sum- situation escalated as a tall white means that we're free to report and here to report the news. mer keg party in Laurier's student male, described as having a white Brandon Currie comment on anything they do In the next four years, we'll be housing district was marred by t-shirt and curly dark hair, pro- Editor-in-Chief without fear of retaliation from the your eyes and ears on campus. violence, leaving three unidenti- ceeded to attack his counterpart. powers that be at Laurier. In fact, We'll hold your leaders account- fied males injured and Waterloo Upon doing so, four other males This may seem painfully obvious, there's only one group of individu- able, keep you well-informed and Regional Police in search of their jumped in to help the assailant but you're currently reading a als on campus that we have any most likely, at some point, piss you five assailants. beat and eventually stab the vic- newspaper. Not a soft-sell market- responsibility towards at all. off. Two of the victims were assault- tim. ing tool, campus promotion vehi- This newspaper belongs solely to Feel free to hold us accountable, ed - with beer bottles while one was "As they were beating him up, cle or propaganda rag an actual you, the students. You read it, we'd like nothing more. Write a let- stabbed in the back and later you could hear [the attackersl say- newspaper. finance it and volunteer for it, so in ter to the editor. Call me (721 - taken to hospital with non-life- ing something like, 'You don't Believe it or not, we're a com- turn, it's our job to inform, inspire, CORD). Come to my office. Start threatening - injuries. want to mess with us'," comment- pletely free student medium and humour and engage those whom your own newspaper. Your criti- The altercation, which erupted ed Shaunz. as you're about to discover when we serve. cism lets us know that we've in front of the residence at 309 you leave home in a couple months Lord knows, we've had long engaged you.

Hawthorn Street, was witnessed - Please see STABBING, page 2 independence is a wonderful enough to perfect the art of student After all, that's what any good by several Laurier students, thing if taken responsibly. journalism. newspaper is supposed to do. including Gordon Shaunz and Joy The Corel Weekly is one of a grow- This year The Cord will turn 80 reaction story in OPINION, Kim. Editorial to this PAGE 8 ing number of student newspapers years old, making us the oldest [email protected] 2 News |Thi Cord Weeklyl

The Cord Weekly

- The tic that binds since 1926 - phone: (519) 884-3970ext. 3564 fax- (519! 883-0873 email: [email protected]

The Cord Weekly 75 UniversityAvenue West Waterloo, Ontario N2L3CS

FROSH MAILER 2005 VOLUME 46 ISSUE 2

Next Issue: July 20 CONTRIBUTORS

Chris Clemens Paige Desmond Don Mogenson Anthony Piscitelli Melissa King Joe Turcotte Brendan Jones Mark Hopkins Marcos Moldes Jennifer O'Neill Erin Paylor Tanya Doroslovac Bricker Lady David Alexander

WLUSP STAFF

Production Co-ordinator. Dave Alexander Production Assistant Ananthan Sinnadurai Copy Editors Dave Alexander Wilbur McLean Photo Managers Jordan Jocius Sydney Holland Online Production Manager. Jason Shim Human Resources Sanjay Ojjo IT Manager. Regan Walsh

WLUSP ADMINISTRATION '^jor^rTJoaus

President Anthony Piscitelli RESCUE, 911 - Paramedics tend to a victim while a police officer consults an eyewitness. Laurier students were among the first to aid the victim. VP: Rnance Fraser McCracken VP: Advertising Angela Foster VP: Brantford James Scott Chair of theBoard Penny Shearer Vice Chair. Sanjay Poninger Board of Directors Evelyn chiu George East Arthur Wong Victim aided by students ADVERTISING All advertising inquiries should be directed to VP: Advertising Angela Foster at 884-0710, ext.

3560 or [email protected] " from STABBING, cover was until he staggered over [to the [The victim] said he was bleed- have been described as white grass] then someone got him to lie ing and maybe in some trouble. males, 18-21 years ofage. The four According to a press release on the ground to apply pressure to The reason why I got involved was others were described as having COLOPHON from Waterloo Regional Police, the wound," said Shaunz, who was because the other person who said shaved heads, with one wearing a two other males were hit with beer about five feet away by the stab he was [the victim's] friend wasn't baggy red shirt and another wear- The Cord Weekly is the official student bottles in the ensuing melee. victim at the time. giving him the attention that war- ing baggy clothes, an orange t- newspaper ofWilfrid Laurier University. These men, say Shaunz and Kim, Richard Scott, a Laurier MBA ranted the blood on his shirt," shirt and short dark brown hair. were originally trying to even out student, arrived at the address Scott told The Cord. Anyone with information about Started in 1926 as the College Cord, The Cord Weekly is an editorially independent newspaper published by Wilfrid the fight in which "alcohol was shortly after the attack had "I lifted up [the victim's] shirt the crime should contact the Laurier University Student Publications, Waterloo, a corpo- ration without share capital. WLUSP is governed by itsboard definitely a factor." occurred and quickly appraised and upon doing that I realized that Waterloo Regional Police Division of directors. As the scuffle moved out onto the situation. He encountered the he'd actually been stabbed. I at 653-7700 extension 3399 or the street, where the man was stab victim standing up on the instructed him to lie on his back Crime Stoppers at 1-800-222-TIPS. eventually stabbed, bystanders road, but "bleeding profusely out and apply pressure his wound," he were shocked to learn the extent of of his back" from a large circular added. With files from Brandon Currie Opinions expressed within The Cord are those of the author his injuries. wound that appeared to be the The group of five attackers fled and do not necessarily reflect those of the Editorial Board, The Cord, WLUSP. WLU, or MasterWeb Printing. "No one knew how serious it diameter of a beer bottle. the scene before police arrived but [email protected]

All content appearing in The Cord bears the copyright expressly of their creator(s) and may not be used without written consent.

The Cordis createdusing Macintosh computers running OS X.2 using Adobe Creative Suite 2 (InDesign, Photoshop, Acrobat, Distiller and Illustrator) and Quark Xpress 6.1. Nikon D7O and Canon Rebel 6.0 megapixel digital cameras McMurray: impact of Bartley's death "huge" are used for principal photography. Adobe Acrobat and Distiller are used to create PDF files which are burned directlyon plates to be mounted on the printing press.

The Cord is printed by MasterWeb Printing, Oakville, and is - from BARTLEY, cover some of the classrooms next year published every Wednesday during the school year except for special editionswhich are published as required. when students come back togeth- er to take common courses and TheCord's circulation for a normal Wednesdayissue is 7.000 "He just walked in and introduced copies and enjoys a readership of over 10,000. himself," smiled McMurray. "He he's missing from that interac- Cord subscription rates are $20.00 per term for addresses had a tremendous sense of tion." within Canada. humour; he made people laugh. Dean McMurray also agrees that The Cord Weeklyis a proud member of the Canadian C J University Press (CUP), since 2004. He just loved life and loved to have Ryan's premature end will leave a at TheCampus Network is The Cord's national fun." void Laurier. McMurray advertising agency. iubm The reach of Ryan's dynamic described Ryan, an aspiring doc-

personality was fully evident at the tor, as a "great role model" - some- funeral service according to one "who had a great time having Preamble to The Cord Constitution McMurray who was amazed by fun but worked hard too." the considerable turnout of Whether or not the alcohol at The Cord will keep faith with its readers by presenting news and expressions of opinions comprehensively, accurately friends from Keswick and the party was a contributing factor and fairly. Waterloo wishing to pay their last in the tragedy is something that The Cord believes in a balanced and impartial presentation on, of all relevant facts in a news report, and of all substantial respects. McMurray will not speculate opinionsin a matter of controversy. "The outpouring at the funeral saying that, "for the most part he Thestaff of The Cord shall uphold allcommonly held ethical home and the church was just so certainly made good decisions. We conventionsof journalism. When an error of omission or of commissionhas occurred, that error shall be acknowledged humbling to see. The whole don't know exactly what hap- promptly. town came out." pened, and we may never know." When statements are made that are critical of an individual, or an organization, we shall give those affected the opportu- Maureen Coulter, a biology For McMurray, the most impor- nity reply the earliest lime possible. to at instructor of Ryan's, was not sur- tant lesson to be learned from Ethical journalism requires impartiality, and consequently not to conflicts of interest and the appearanceof conflicts of inter- prised by the sizeable attendance Ryan's regrettable passing is est will beavoided by all staff. at his funeral. She remembers take the fragility oflife in stride. The only limits of any newspaper are those of the world Ryan as a "promising" student that "His benefit to others and the around it, and so The Cord will attempt to cover its world with a special focus on Wilfrid Laurier University, and the had "a good rapport" with others. impact he's made on others as a community of Kitchener-Waterloo, and with a special ear to the concerns of the students of Wilfrid Laurier University. He stood out in a crowd of stu- result of losing his life is exten- Ultimately, The Cordwill be bound by neither philosophy, nor geography in its mandate. dents because of his fun-loving sive. .. huge... because it stops you in The Cord has an obligation to losler freedom of the press nature," recalls Coulter. "He was your tracks and makes you real- and freedom of speech. Thisobligation is best fulfilled when so he ize is it debate and dissent are encouraged, both in the internal always friendly, always took how precious life because workings of the paper, and through The Cord's contact with the time to greet you and to say could end in seconds." the student body. goodbye. It's nice to have that Hie Cord will always attempt to dowhat is right, with fearof Contributed Photo neither repercussions, nor retaliation. The purpose of the warmth in the classroom and that student press is toact as an agent of socialawareness, and so GONE BUT NOT FORGOTTEN - Bartley was always one to stand shall conduct the affairs of our newspaper. connection with the students. I amci@cord weekly,corn as Dean McMurray. out from his peers noted by his professors and think there will be a certain hole in The Cord Weekly] News FROSH MAILER 2005 3 Leaders of Laurier welcome you

The WLU brass provides insight into life and Laurier, including what to expect from the school in 2005 - 2006

Name: Dr. Robert Rosehart Name: Dan Robert Name: Scott Carson Name: David Docherty Name: Peter Baxter Position: President ofWLU Position: President & CEO ofWLU Position: Dean of Laurier School Position: Dean of Faculty ofArts Position: Athletic Director Students' Union of Business and Economics (SBE) WhatWLU is all about: On Laurier Arts: Sports Bite: "I think the great advantage of On what to expect at WLU: On Laurier SBE: "I think [the students] can expect a "With more people coming into Laurier is the balance students get "The campus lends itself to a lot of "Our very considerable size gives really good all-around introduc- the [Athletic Complex] to use just in terms of the academic pro- exciting things; relationship build- our incoming students a huge tion into what constitutes the lib- as casual recreation, casual work- grams and the various cultural, ing on this campus is generally a advantage in that there is almost eral arts, and I think that for out, or personal fitness, they tend social, and athletic types of activi- large focus in that you get to know no area ofbusiness studies that we incoming students, their first year to see all the other opportunities ty. By and large, in going to school so many people so quickly and the don't cover one way or the other. really should be that kind of that are there. We have swimming, here our students generally have a working relationships that are I've always felt the structure of our exploratory year where they take instructional classes, personal lot of fun. It's a very positive expe- going on this campus, be it the program is quite advantageous to the subject they wanted to take training you can take part in so rience and I think it's because of university administration or the a new student coming in with when they came here, and also you're going to see a lot of active that balance." students union and everybody opportunities to experiment [with two three they'd never ever think growth in those areas. I think our else is so beneficial to students courses] at the front [first year]. It's of taking in their lives... Given the facility is very welcoming that The Pres says: coming onto this campus. [The a very youthful and active place things we've got: cultural studies, people from all levels can feel "We know the students we admit students] can really expect what- with lots of students working in medieval studies, women's stud- comfortable." here are going to be successful in ever they want and that there's groups and with case competi- ies, Mediterranean, etc. the first their programs, but being success- nothing on this campus that is tions. There's a good spirited com- year is really a great year for stu- Healthy Hint for WLU: ful in the program doesn't mean impossible." petitiveness that arises..." dents in Arts majors because "Get involved in a wide variety of that they're going to develop per- they're not bound..." activities.. .1 think that's part of the sonally. It's that personal develop- Welcoming words: Wise words from the Dean: real jewel of Laurier. You get to ment which is all a part of the "Take full advantage and make "It's important to get an education Wise words from the Dean: know a lot of people and the big Laurier experience." sure that you're finding a great bal- of the whole person; gel involved "You've got four years to think social network involved with it. ance between your academics and outside of the classroom. Laurier about things that you want to your social life and everything else is very rich with societies and think about. That's not just a privi- For Student Publications' welcome to and we just hope that we can con- associations... this is the whole lege, that's a real treat having four compiled by Dan Polischuk Laurier, please read the President's tinue to provide for that at any part of the maturation of the years to really explore your own message and publication profiles, time." whole person." mind and the world around you, so make the most of it." PAGE 6 Robert, Rosehart divided over another smoking referendum

ESL Teacher Training Courses a students," from SMOKING, cover With seemingly large percent- some said Robert. thought out. ■ Intensive 60-Hour Program see a came out "To it's age of students wanting to "One of the issues that hear that being tabled for ■ Classroom Management Techniques "I don't know where this is campus ban, Rosehart feels there of the referendum was how many a year is a wise decision. I think ■ Detailed Lesson Planning exactly going to go in terms of is no reason to pose the question people really knew about it, the there are a lot of unanswered ■ Comprehensive Teaching Materials implementation, but the direction again. wording of the question, and no questions that the university still ■ Internationally Recognized Certificate I've given to this group is that I "I don't really see why we'd do one really knowing the repercus- has in the administration and how ■ Job Guarantee Included want a strategy that a) has a mod- another one because you could sions of voting or not, or what they it was going to be enforced." ■ Thousands of Satisfied Students erate chance of being successful, take any group of more than a were voting for," he added. Oxford Seminars b) hundred people and do a referen- While crediting the WLU for doesn't involve the 'sledgeham- (-800-269-6719 / 416-924-3240 mer' approach and c) promotes dum and you'd still get a 75-25 making a pioneering effort, Robert dpolischu k@cordi ueekly. com responsibility," said Rosehart. result. It just reflects the number believes the issue must be well Rosehart, who strongly sup- in society," he said. ports a total ban, believes the However, Students' Union whole issue began with little President Dan Robert, a member Did you know about your vision recognition of the '10-metre rule' of the implementation committee, BUY ONE Get that requires Laurier's smokers to has a different approach in mind. coverage??? ML JZ7 light up well away from building One idea he has is to bring back Call us for details ONE FREE! entranceways. the question during the WLUSU EYEGLASSES OR CONTACTS "This one I find really surpris- election period when students are —7—- ing, because my experience with already "engaged." # Buy one complete pair of eyeglasses Laurier students is that they're "Let's hear the 'Yes' campaign, 'JP very responsible and very respect- let's here the 'No' campaign. Let's \jfr- or soft contact lenses at regular ful of the university. They have no really get a true gauge of the stu- price, and get a second pair FREE. difficulty though with littering the dents because I feel where it came place with cigarette butts," he out of the first referendum was a commented. true gauge of faculty, staff, and i 1 — Check out our Sunglasses Centre

One Hour service on most Cord Weekly - The 101 News glasses and contact Senses, This year's section continues the tradition of bringing accurate and fair news to In its 150 University Ave. W. the student population. effort to produce quality journal- Campus Court Plaza, News * ism, will be the source of reliable information on campus. For C®X*lfjHß (corner of Philip and University) WLU events, quarrels, debates and forums, Cord News will be there in 2005-2006. 4 » FROSH MAILER 2005 News The Cord Weekly A Bag O' Crime Publisher mid-summer's to sell ad Welcome to the Bag O' Crime, Laurier Security's weekly gift to The Cord's readership space in MISCHIEF Link. a student on the fifth floor of the dows at the Parking Kiosk on Mid Saturday June4,2:20am Alvin Woods Building had struck Campus Dr and stolen a Parking MISCHIEF his head and was bleeding. The Services jacket. text books Officers responded to a report that Wednesday June 8-9 bleeding was controlled and the someone had managed to move a student was escorted to Health MISCHIEF DAN POLISCHUK piece of construction equipment, Person(s) unknown broke the Services for further treatment. Sunday June 19,12-2:lsam News Editor a 'Bobcat,' from the rear of Bricker glass in one of the doors on the Residence to the front of the resi- first floor of the Peters Building. MISCHIEF Person(s) unknown broke the This coming September as stu- dence. On arrival, officers Saturday June 18, 2:2oam glass in the lower portion of the dents rip off the shrink-wrap on observed a male driving the MISCHIEF door to office 2CI in the Arts their new supply of textbooks, it is equipment but when he saw the Saturday June 11, 12:45am While on patrol, officers found Building. quite possible that among all the officers he immediately jumped that someone had removed the charts, diagrams, and informa- off and fled. Waterloo Regional Person(s) unknown broke the sign from the ground in front of THEFT UNDER $5000 tion, an insert advertisement or Police were notified. The suspect glass in a door on the main floor of PP&P at 81 Lodge Stand placed it Thursday June23 two may be imbedded as well. was not apprehended. the Nichols Campus Centre. on the roadway along with some Publisher McGraw-Hill, has skids and concrete blocks. Person(s) unknown stole a bicycle began to publicize its idea of sell- MISCHIEF THEFT UNDER $5000 from the bike racks on Mid ing advertising space between Saturday June4,2:15am Sunday June 12 THEFT UNDER $5000 Campus Drive. their book covers. Started in 1829, Saturday June 18, 3:22pm the company, which sold approxi- Person(s) unknown broke the A patron of the Athletic Complex Crime of the Week mately one million textbooks last glass in a door on the second floor reported the theft of his wallet A student reported that someone year with revenue reaching $88 of the Nichols Centre. while using the gym at the Athletic stole her wallet while she was writ- DOMESTIC DISPUTE million, is considered to be one of Complex. The wallet was found a ing an exam at the Bricker Monday June 20, 6:45pm Canada's largest suppliers to uni- MISCHIEF short time later but some of the Academic Building. versities. Plans for the ad involve Saturday June 4 contents were missing. Officers intervened in a domestic selling the ads, which would be

MISCHIEF dispute between two guests stay- inserts - not printed permanently

Person(s) unknown threw a rock MEDICAL ASSIST Sunday June 19,2:35am ing at Laurier Place. One of the with the actual text - at a rate of through the window of one of the Friday June 17, 1:00pm parties involved voluntarily left $1.40 per book. offices in the Theatre A report was received that some- the premises and no further action In an earlier article published in Auditorium/MacDonald House Officers responded to a report that one had broken one of the win- was required. the Toronto Star, a development specialist with the company explained that 'frosh packs' for first-year students already contain LOST & FOUND various sales pitches through sim- ilar insert advertising, often by During this time period the following types of items were turned in to Lost & Found: banks. The Cord's efforts toreceive Eyeglasses, Keys, Bank Card, Jacket, Cell phones, Pager, Purse, Shoes, Books, Wallets, Camera, Bracelet, Watch. any more details of the plan through a McGraw-Hill spokesper- If you have lost any of these items please check at the Community Safety & Security office across from the Dining Hail or call 885-3333 (external) or son were unsuccessful. extension 3333 (internal).

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For more information email * M [email protected] Weekly ￿ The Cord O-week Introduction FRGSH MAiLER 2005 5 "Myths, legends" planned for O-week

WLUSU organizers anticipate comprehensive Orientation Week experience

DAN POLISCHUK News Editor

WLUSU organizers are just about ready to kick-off another Orientation Week, with this year's theme dubbed 'Where Myth Becomes Legends.' With the tagline 'Your dream, your experience, your reality', the 2005 version of O-Week will play off a mythology theme which will go along with dispelling any pre- conceived ideas new undergradu- ates may have about university. O-week co-ordinator Erin Paylor believes that incoming " Contributed Photo

Frosh should be "so excited about EAGER BEAVERS - The Orientation Committee is anxiously awaiting your arrival for the "Where Myth Becomes Legends" O-week. coming to Laurier." a so have a really "I think that it [O-Week] gives "O-Week is meant to keep stu- making sure everyone is having The major change from year before, and they of big focus on trying be success- first year students the tools they dents minds off the fact that fun, he will still let new Golden ago will be the addition a to Services Session. With ful and get through university, so need to really get their foot in the they're away from home; to try Hawks know about how good it is Learning door and really feel like they're and get them to jump into a new to get involved within the univer- faculties holding separate semi- we try and introduce them to nars on that," part of the university. And our O- environment and meet new sity. topics from plagiarism to said Paylor. Week facilitates that," said Paylor. friends," commented Paylor. "There are really a lot of things essay writing formats, it will pro- "But it's also really important Divided into teams for the five That level of motivation will be to get involved in here... definitely vide students with an understand- that they get a balance of the uni- a options," said Clegg, point- ing of the academic expectations versity and having fun - that's real- days - the Red Phoenix, Green the job of senior students, named lot of Paylor. Dragons, Blue Giants, and Gold Iceßreakers, who will be volun- ing out that the "Get Involved at Laurier. ly important," added be held on the "This year there's been a big Gryphons - students take part teering their time to lead the Fair", which will will commentary on Orientation Week, in activities which will aim to dis- groups through all of the excite- Wednesday, is an opportunity to focus on academic sessions just For into pel any anxiety of starting a new ment. Mike Clegg, one of the Head sign up with already established because people are coming please see OPINION, PAGE 9 chapter of their lives. Iceßreakers, noted that while campus clubs or start one anew. university a lot younger than years Ready, set, shine Canada's number one Shinerama campaign ready to raise thousands for cystic fibrosis

ADRIAN MA tation week," said Cayenne. "A lot with much of the contribution News Editor of schools will only have a coming from students themselves. Shinerama day, or one or two sec- The 'Bling Bling' game, a popular It began in the 60's, a humble ondary fundraisers, but they don't O-week competition played by fundraising attempt where first- have an opportunity to really get frosh students, raised an eye- year students ran around town across to the first year students opening $30,000 in barely ten shining shoes to raise money. what Shinerama is about and raise minutes. Shinerama, a frosh tradition awareness about cystic fibrosis." While this kind offundraising is started at Laurier over 40 years Cystic fibrosis (CF) is an incur- impressive, McGilvery realizes ago, has since grown into a nation- able affliction that harms the that pulling in such quantities of al event over the decades and now lungs and digestive system and money is becoming increasingly features tens of thousands of first- affects thousands of Canadians, difficult, especially when years from all around Canada with young children being the Shinerama expectations continue shining shoes, cars, windows, and majority of the sufferers. to be raised year after year. doing just about anything to col- It was meeting people with CF "It's really hard to raise more lect donations. that inspired Nicole McGilvery, money, and a lot of it is consisten- With each passing generation of this year's Shinerama co-ordina- cy. We're trying to do a lot more first-years, the scope and size of tor, to do what she could to further summer activities so we're not Shinerama has gotten bigger, and the campaign. She plans to intro- pulling away too much from the the goals have become more duce individuals living with CF to students." ambitious; this year the ultimate Shinerama participants, hoping These events include a golf goal is to raise over one million that a similar motivation will spark tournament and a bottle drive. dollars nationally, with the funds the incoming students. Shine Day, however, remains going towards the battle against "Meeting people with CF has the cornerstone of the entire cam- cystic fibrosis. just changed my life, they're so paign. It's the day when students File Photo Laurier remains a front-runner courageous in the things that they hit the streets to shine just about with banana cream, McGilvery has ages people to talk to their Ice- in Shinerama campaigns, often go through and so [we're] bringing anything and is the campaign's some advice on how they can still Breakers to get the most out of outperforming major Canadian [them here] to let first years see most lucrative event, with Laurier contribute to Shinerama and their experience. universities despite having a that," said McGilvery. raking in a handsome $80, 000 last enjoy the fundraising event. Ultimately, while McGilvery smaller student body. For the past While the festivities surround- year. McGilvery has seen students "You have to find your own feels that raising money to help four WLU more years, has raised ing orientation week and do everything from shining win- niche, and for students who may those suffering from CF is a laud- the annual event than money in Shinerama remain an essential dows and face painting to sere- be a little more quiet and not com- able effort, she does not wish for other any Canadian university. aspect of frosh week, McGilvery nading the public with acoustic fortable approaching people, you students to feel pressure to per- Allan the Vice Cayenne, wants to remind people that the guitars and busting out dance can try and find someone who is a form. Having an enjoyable experi- President of Student Activities, root of all the raucous cheering moves worthy of Napoleon little more extroverted, and let ence is the key to Shinerama's suc- attributes Laurier's consistently and entertainment is charity. Dynamite. She even recalls stu- those people approach them, cess. strong showing to the work of vol- "Yeah it's fun and there's compe- dents accepting donations in while you collect the money." "Have fun. Go out there, have unteers and the school's highly tition between the different return for receiving a pie in the Other ways to pitch in include fun with your Ice-Breakers, have effective orientation program. coloured teams, but it's for a good face. washing cars, holding signs and fun meeting new people in your "We have a unique Shinerama cause." For students more reserved and distributing tokens of apprecia- frosh group, and have fun meeting campaign because our campaign Laurier raised $170 000 last year, less keen on being pummeled tion to donors. She also encour- people your community." is integrated very well with orien- Message Weeklyl 6 ￿FROSH MAILER 2005 from WLUSP IThe Cord Messagefrom a president Sputnik orbits student Brantford Dear Frosh, life in

Please let me be the to congrat- PAIGE DESMOND The Sputnik comes in. first Sputnik Editor in Chief ulateyou. I don't want to congratu- Sputnik volunteers cover every- late you on your decision to come thing from campus and commu- Our satellite is in orbit for another to Wilfrid Laurier University. I nity news to international events year. want to congratulate you on and entertainment. A must for Sputnik is Laurier becoming part owner of Wilfrid The anyone wishing to get involved Laurier University Student Brantford's student newspaper, with The Sputnik is a desire to and it's where all the cool people Publications (WLUSP). change the world that they live in hang out. Although The Sputnik When you pay your student and is the perfect outlet for any- fees had somewhat shaky beginnings, in late August, in addition to the one who's ever been told they're it into a regular thousands you will be handing has developed very opinionated. publication and has begun to over to the University, you will also While student publications in make a name for itself in Brantford be paying a $6 membership to Brantford may be a relatively small fee as the place to find important WLUSP Paying this makes you group, we prove that size really fee information as well as some pow- part of a proud tradition ofstudent does not matter. We aim for quali- journalism. ered opinion. ty over quantity and are devoted to is a Originally, Laurier's student The Brantford Campus representing diverse opinions and small, fairly close-knit community. media- was under the control its viewpoints, true to the character of Jordan Jocius In spite of this, it can be difficult to student government (the Students' ofLaurier Brantford. TAKIN' 'ER EASY- Don't blame us for electing WLUSP President find information and this is where Union). However, Laurier's after Anthony Piscitelli; as the he was acclaimed. campus newspaper, The Cord only candidate, Weekly, was shut down by the need your help. In return we [email protected], come by the WLUSP offer Student's Union, broke you valuable Training and a in the basement the away and asserted it's independ- office of chance to see your name in print. MacDonald House residence, or ence as a non-profit corporation. Publishing doesn't just involve call me at 519-884-0710 ext. 3565. From its humble beginnings the creation ofcontent; there is also You may still be concerned that publishing The Cord Weekly, a bureaucracy that needs volun- you 're not creative, don't have com- WLUSP has grown and now pub- teers in order to puter skills and can't organize any- lishes Blueprint function ineffi- magazine, the ciently. So for those of you who thing. Fear not; we have developed Keystone yearbook, the WLU'er aren't interested in being involved a position in WLUSP which those student planner, the clublaurier.ca in content, you can still do your of you without any useful skills website, Sputnik, and The Laurier part by taking on an administra- should consider. It's called the campus newspaper. Brantford's tive position in finance, human WLUSP President & CEO, and elec- Each these is of publications pro- resources, distribution, advertising, tion this position takes place our for duced by dedicated student or on theBoard Directors. once ayear. volunteers. of Getting involved in WLUSP is This come in. is where you easy; absolutely no experience is Sincerely, Ifyou like to write, take pictures, necessary. More importantly, it design webpages, layout pub- print ensures that the terrorists won't David Alexander lications, or if you annoy your win. DON'T STOP - Brantford's newest stop sign is soon to be joined by a friends by constantly correcting To get involved allyou need to do Anthony Piscitelli fully-operational Laurier Brantford Student Center. The centre will be they're their grammar, then we is send me an email at presi- WLUSP President & CEO home to Brantford's Foot Patrol, and, ideally. The Sputnik. Blueprint looks ahead Mark up your Keystone LENNA TITIZIAN ative expression; each issue con- DAVID ALEXANDER stone tablet. Blueprint Editor Chief in tains literary, artistic and photo- 1/2 Keystone Editor in Chief Luckily, Laurier has such a graphic works. Web-content com- tablet: the Keystone yearbook. Our Blueprint magazine is a student- Let me a secret: pliments the print version of the tell you small job is to chronicle life at Laurier, run project that publishes four magazine. despite increasingly large class- not unlike some kind of bizarre issues per year. Currently in its fourth year of sizes and ever expanding first-year religious order. A reflection of the diversity of publication, Blueprint distributes student enrollment numbers, So, now that we've compared Laurier's student it population, 2,000 copies on campus, in the Laurier is still a relatively small ourselves to areligious cult, I'd like includes thought-provoking arti- school. local Waterloo community and in to invite you to join said cult. cles and commentary on many national bookstores through the Keystone is look- issues to that matter students, Magazine's Canada (CMPA) Our job is to chronicle life at Laurier, ing for loyal vol- as mass culture, issues, such social Newstand and Library Partnership unteers to help politics and trends. recent Programs. not unlike kind of bizarre with photogra- events, some By reviewing local sub- Blueprint is also a part of the phy, layout and cultures and trends, Blueprint Genuine Canadian Magazine pro- out the volunteer form available at religious order. writing about pays attention to the local com- gram. blueprintmagazine.ca beginning prominent munity and investigates the ways Any students interested in vol- July 11. Laurier people, in which it interacts with the world It easy to unteering for contribution, pro- Watch for the official launch of is fairly get involved events and organizations. If you're as a whole. with the Student's Union, Student duction, or copy-editing can fill our website on August 19, 2005! interested in helping, please email It is also a publication of ere- Publications, Residence Life or [email protected] one of Laurier's many Campus So get involved in Laurier's civil With Clubs. so much to do on society and let us know about all campus, you might wonder the exciting stuff you do. Life only it is whether possible for your leg- happens once; it's important to endary achievements at WLU to take lots of pictures. To the families of new Laurier Students be immortalized in some kind of In just 4 short years, you will be looking for ways to congratulate the new Laurier Graduate in your family.

® Keep this as a reminder and after Labour Day of your ■ W i tf* *1 J / \ Grad's fourth year, give us a call and have your

~' : '*%- congratulations printed in the Keystone yearbook to be kept forever. %^'fff/'-i-' • ■ Complete 30-Hour Seminars r' (519) 884-0710 ext. 3560 ■ Proven Test-Taking Strategies \'-ff'^~ 112 » Personalized Professional Instruction .j.\\ ■ Comprehensive Study Materials / ■ Simulated Practice Exams J Reminder to all 2006 Grads ■ Free Repeat Policy 'ias4} ■ Personal Tutoring Available • jjHlw Go to clublaurier.ca and register for your Graduate Photo sitting. ■ Thousands of Satisfied Students Don't miss having your picture printed in your department's Oxford Seminars what is this? a keystone is class composite and the Keystone yearbook 1-800-269-671 9 the central wedge-shaped 41 6-924-3240 stone that locks together the parts of an arch. Get it? via®fiBEBSfIL pupucatibns^^^

Wilfrid Laurier University Student Publications is an organization run by and for the students of Laurier. Since the dawn of time, we have provided the student body with information, a forum for discussion and useful and rewarding volunteer experiences. Volunteer for Student Publications and you can develop your writing skills, photography skills, numchucks skills, opining skills... For more information about WLUSP, please contact [email protected] nfITgfIfIMWWTWB The Sputnik g]

Laurier's official student newspaper Laurier Brantford's student newspaper

Since 1926, The Cord Weekly has been Laurier's offi- Due to the rapid expansion of Laurier's Brantford cial source for news, information, and discussion campus, WLUSP launched The Sputnik two years ago about life at WLU and beyond. In addition to the serv- to provide Brantford students with information and ice provided to the Laurier community, The Cord offers viewpoints relevant to Brantford campus issues. As many valuable opportunities for students looking to The Sputnik continues to evolve, more opportunities develop writing, editing, design and photography become available for volunteers to develop their joun- skills. ralistic abilities.

For more information, For more information, contact [email protected] contact [email protected]

Keystone ClubLaurier.i a The Laurier yearbook Laurier's online portal

Keystone offers an annual review of the people, ClubLaurier is Laurier's online community. It fea- events and organizations that have a significant tures online content from each of our publications, impact on the lives of Laurier students. In addition, photo galleries, events listings and other information this yearbook also commemorates the graduating and commentary related to life at Laurier. ClubLaurier class of each year. will be relaunched in August.

For more information, For more information, contact [email protected] contact [email protected]

Blueprint t/ie f/'/ff r/' 'rfftf/r/t/fj/a/t/tcr Laurier's student magazine An invaluable time-management tool

Blueprint is Laurier's official student magazine. A good planner is essential to balancing academic Editorial articles critiquing and analyzing mass cul- work with extra-curricular and personal time commit- ture, current trends and local subcultures appear ments. The wlu'er is free to all Laurier students and is alongside literary submissions and photography from an incredibly useful tool for time-management. In students. Our new website blueprintmagazine.ca will addition, the wlu'er features inspirational quotes and be launched on August 17th, so stay tuned. some information about Laurier, WLUSU and WLUSP.

For more information, For more information, contact [email protected] contact [email protected] 8!*FRGSH MAILER 2005 Editorial The Cord Weekly

The CordWeekly

~ The tie that hinds since 1926 ~ Editorial Board

Editor-in-Chief International Editor Special Projects Editor BrandonCurrie Tony Ferguson April Cunningham [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] {519) 884-0710 ext. 3563 Arts & Entertainment Editor Cord Historian News Editors Alex Hayter Kris Cote Adrian Ma [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] Sports Editor Print Production Manager

Dan Polischuk .... „ Mike Brownn Bryn Boycer> dpo [email protected] [email protected] [email protected] Opinion Editor Features Editor Photography Manager Carly Beath Blair Forsyth-Stark Jordan Jocius c eathOcordweekly.com [email protected] [email protected] Graphics Editor Student Life Editor 884-0710 ext. 2852 Emilie Joslin Michelle Pinchev [email protected] • . , ~ ' 3 [email protected]

Welcome to Laurier - proceed with caution

this newspaper, a rather strange one from our perspective in that we're writing to first-year students and not the entire campus community, you may have been shocked to see two sobering news stories run on our cover. A student death and a stabbing are likely not what you've seen or In Emilie Joslin heard about Waterloo and Laurier up until now. Don't read these articles and think that you've made the wrong choice by coming to Laurier - it's usually quite a safe place, outside of the occasional alcohol or testosterone-fuelled act of aggression. As a young, healthy 17 or 18-year-old about to move away from home, most of you naturally feel a sense of invincibility as you look forward to what you've You can go your been told will be the best four years of your life. The thoughts of death and mortality are often uncomfortable ones in the university environment where social and academic life blur one's perspective of the big picture. If nothing else, learn from these tragic events. You're young and likely to make stupid mistakes throughout your Laurier career. It's far easier to heed the lessons of others' follies, but they're also much easier to ignore. The onus own way is on you to be cognizant of the fragility of your own life and proceed with some sense of caution. University is short, but so too is life. Don't get stuck thinking that your time at Laurier has to unravel in a certain way Enjoy both with care. things will start to look like com- all that kinky stuff you like (and mon sense to you. "That's just the don't pretend you don't) and does Smoking delay makes sense for now way it is," you will think. When you it well. And that way you're also do, take another look. not getting any terrible surprises After trying to push through an As was stated a month ago in this CARLY BEATH I'm taking four years to do my in the morning. Bar lighting can Opinion Editor online referendum in April that column, the best way to carry this three year degree. It's amazing do wonders. polled the Laurier community on its out would be to add a smoking ban how much more breathing room The Laurier myth machine is a attitude towards a "smoke-free cam- referendum question to student My favourite prof gave us a lecture even four classes a semester will powerful thing. Don't let yourself pus,'' Laurier's administration will elections this winter, when an in class one day. Not a regular class give you. And I am going to be one get sucked in. Question the stories now wait an entire year to decide appropriate amount of debate and lecture as in 'Here are some happy girl this year when I'm tak- people tell you. Because while it's how to implement a ban that was awareness can shed light on the important facts for you to know', ing one class a semester and I have guaranteed that you will hear at over of the a as in, 'You supported by 70 percent complicated issue. but lecture fucked up time to read my Derrida book. A least five times that "Laurier's WLUSU, for its part, must contin- and now to hear poll's 2000-plus participants. you're going victory lap is not something to be small size is great - you can't walk By all accounts, waiting is the ue to press the admin to be account- about it.' ashamed of. Take as much or as lit- to class without seeing ten people right thing to do. More time is need- able to students on this issue, and What she told us was that most tle time as you want/need/can you know," what you won't hear is ed to answer thelingering questions consolidate its position by passing a students never really immerse afford. that more often than not, those that surround the that throws the full of We vomit issue, most impor- motion weight themselves in learning. ten people will be tantly whether or not the inconspic- the organization behind a new vote up essays the night before they're the ten people you uous referendum was legitimate. that will truly gauge where students due. We rely on the odds to get us Hunter S. Thompson walked into most want to avoid. The admin vows that it will con- stand. through multiple choice tests by You won't hear tinue to consult campus 'stakehold- While Laurier President Bob randomly filling in circles. We read Rolling Stone, rambled that the small size is ers' as it continues to develop its for- Rosehart may be entirely correct only bits of books, enough to pull great until you real- mula for implementation. While the that the results of the April vote out an acceptable diversity of incoherently and then injected ize that everyone opinions of Laurier's faculty and reflect Canadians' social attitude on quotes for essays. We do the bare know is some- himself with god-knows-what - you staff surely matter, the Laurier brass smoking, a new, transparent vote is minimum to get the marks we how connected and must realize that students hold the needed to ensure that this supposed need. so they gave him a job. they all know your biggest stake on campus and thus fact applies to Laurier's students. "Read an entire book," my prof business, whether should be given the most say on the said. "Take less than five classes a you told them or matter. semester so that you have time to When RadioLaurier doesn't give not. The myth machine's stories really devote yourself to your you a show, don't sigh and pick ignore the complexities of life. Century Plan must tread carefully classes. Go into debt if you have some other standard Laurier vol- One day Hunter S. Thompson to." unteer activity that isn't what you walked into the office of the edi- On paper, Laurier's Century Plan increase the credibility of a Laurier As she talked, I thought of the really want. Walk down the street tor-in-chief of Rolling Stone, ram- seems like a pretty good idea. After degree. But it will also likely alter the time I was in the library and felt to the University of Waterloo and bled incoherently and then inject- all, we can't be known as the 'the identity and culture of our campus, the urge to grab all sorts of books. get yourself a show on their open- ed himself in the stomach with high school down the street from the this we must recognize. The prospect ofreading a book on to-the-whole-community FM air- god-knows-what. And what did University ofWaterloo' forever. With an influx of graduate and French theorist Jacques Derrida waves. Rolling Stone do? They gave him a But I I At the very least, the architects of international students who have a seemed fabulous. couldn't. When it seems like everyone job. Now, I'm not advocating fol- the plan must be commended for lifestyle quite unlike that of a first- had to eschew the books I wanted and their dog is going home with lowing Hunter S. Thompson's lead write setting out a bold vision for our year, the student population will in favour of going home to randoms from the bar, don't feel exactly - that's probably a bad school, even if that means putting grow and diversify, slowly eroding five essays that I had let pile up like you have to do the same, idea. more focus on graduate studies. the tight-knit community atmos- and that 1 didn't care about. unless that's your thing. I know What I'm trying to tell you with Undoubtedly, the planned phere so readily advertised to poten- And so what I want to tell you is plenty of people who have never that little anecdote is that there is don't to increase in graduate programs and tial Laurier students. this: you have do things done it. You're just as well off to more than one way to do things. faculty research will enrich the aca- It's time that Laurier be renowned the way that everyone tells you find yourself one person who does There is more than one way to get otherwise). demic quality of a Laurier educa- for what a university should be (overtly or Certain where you want to go. Figure out tion. Few would disagree that the known for - a quality education. what and run The Cord Weekly 101 - Opinion works best for you presence of a post-graduate law with it, even, or maybe especially, school or a teacher's college would The Opinion section analyzes current events and offers insight on if it's off the beaten path. topics of interest to students from Laurier issues to politics to every- These unsigned editorials were agreed upon by at least two-thirds of the day life. It also contains readers' letters and the unsigned editorial, [email protected] The Cord's Editorial Board and do not necessarily reflect the views ofThe which is the collective view of the Editorial Board on a newsworthy Cord's volunteers, staff or WLUSP. issue. The Cord Weekly Opinion ￿' FROSH MAILER 2005 9

Point / Counterpoint: O-week

The Yay side:O-week gives you the chance to meet The Nay side: O-Week needs to be more casual and organic to give students the people and get prepared for your first year at university chance to branch out and get settled in on their own terms

First, make it a more chilled-out a bit of free reign on Let tirelessly to provide you with the campus. best 0-Week ever. Upon arrival, week. You'll get to Laurier and them meet who they want to meet (within you will join one of the four colour some poor soon-to-be-ragged and do reason) what they teams consisting of students from Iceßreaker with a nickname like want to do. And ditch the 7am PAYLOR - ERIN all faculties and residences. You BRYN BOYCE "C-dot" is going to figuratively pull wake up calls there is absolutely O-week Coordinator Production Manager may discover that you're part of you around from event to event by nothing natural or organic about the Red Phoenix, Blue Giants, your hand. You'll never stop mov- that. At the risk of sounding like a Congratulations and welcome to Green Dragons or Gold Gryphons. ing, cheering or drawing on each O-Week angers people because not scrooged-out old man, Frosh Week its the Laurier family! You may No matter which team you are others T-shirts the whole week (if of glitzy, artificial feel and the (or O-Week, officially) is not likely know it yet, but you have just destined to, all four colours will this appeals to you, you really fact that not everyone has the one going to be the culmination point made of the greatest decisions unite as Laurier Golden Hawks, should be reading the article next energy or attitude of a cheerleader of of all your days. In fact, you may to one). an your life by enrolling in Wilfrid the best team one could ask for! this bred with over-eager camp Laurier even be horrified by what you see University! You're probably Although it may sound like a counselor. early this September because nervous, scared and extremely cliche, O-Week will provide you I remember frankly, it has been known to get a Being divided into groups, anxious for September to arrive... with memories that will last a life- Matt Good chiding Rest little infantile. and who can blame you? time and set you on the right track pressured the double cohort assured that this unfamiliar place Now don't get me wrong, I assigned colours and to experience all that Laurier has frosh, asking them soon become home thought Finding Neverland was an will your away to offer. Laurier's O-Week is one of into cheering when the "purple uplifting Johnny about how much from home. the best in Canada. Wait, who's movie, too. KoolAid" was com- Depp's tireless (and regrettably Throughout this experience kidding who? It's the best in the better your randomly selected ing out. He (rather drug-free) efforts a Orientation Week will enable you world! It provides all first year stu- to engage dramatically) com- a tonne friends, small, skeptical child in the Peter to make of dents with action-packed events team is than another, is nothing pared O-Week to a

achieve new heights and accom- Pan-style 'land of make believe' - from morning 'til night - academic cult an overused - if a little Michael plish goals that you never imag- sessions, information about social were cute not short of ridiculous. analogy. here, times. ined possible. It all starts on events, school life and much, Jackson at Nonetheless, there cam- And perhaps I am that child the first day you step onto much more. So get excited... get Being busy is good, but you is some truth to this criticism when it comes to Frosh Week, but pus... something that we like to excited now! don't meet people because, because the structure of O-Week (a.k.a. I think we can all agree that, given call Orientation Week O- Of course, you will not go despite your frantic 'fun-having,' really is confining and keeps peo- and as Week). through this experience without both your age stage frosh, you rarely get to stop cheering ple locked into one type of experi- being divided into O-Week you say? It's such a sim- some direct guidance. Enter groups, long enough for even the simplest ence. ple title for the most unforgettable assigned colours and pressured of worse Icebreakers - your friends and introductions. What's is If the organizers want O-Week into six days of your life. This year's guides for the entire week. They'll cheering about how much that the colour division and sub- to be fun for the students, then O- theme bring back to better your randomly selected means will you teach you the ins and outs of group division system you Week should be more about get- team is than another, is nothing ancient times where your imagi- Laurier and will answer all of your really only mingle with the same ting to know who you'll spend the nation can soar, as Laurier pres- questions. Everything isready, and short ofridiculous. 20 people the entire time. next three or four years with, ents Orientation Week 2005, I was a Gold Grizzly but I made it is now left up to you to bring Second, the organizers have to rather than lambasting the blue a "Where Myths Become Legends... your unique personalities, talents the mistake of picking up Blue stop trying to micromanage the team because they lost the finals Your Shark t-shirt. Oh, the humilia- dream, your experience, your and energy into action and enjoy entire week. Sure, put on the in the three-legged race. reality". tion... Orientation Week 2005, "Where events like the concert, the party master- Throughout the summer, a Myths Become Legends." Frosh Week and its or the trip to Bingeman's Park but bboyce@cord weekly, com group of 17 crazy Orientation minds have always missed a cou- make the week more casual and Committee members are working ple very important lessons. organic by giving the new students The life and times of the Bricker Lady Mary Jo Guy tells you why she's the last non-student living on Laurier's campus and invites you to stop in for a visit

Avenue. My pop died in 1986 and my mom in 1989. I came to Waterloo in 1953 and attended Waterloo College, as MARY JO GUY was at Community Editorial Board Wilfrid Laurier called the time. There were 300 hundred stu- dents, of which 30 were women. 1 live at 46 Bricker Avenue, in the There were no pizza places in only house on Laurier left the town so my mom cooked home- campus, next to the Bricker made pizza for all of the women. Residence. After one year I went to New York I was born in Wisconsin in 1934. to become an actor. My father was a doctor in a small After I got married and had chil- town for eight years, but decided dren, I ended up living in New to go into public health. We moved Jersey. Each summer I would around Wisconsin, ending up in come up to Bricker Avenue with Madison where he became the my kids. I always felt Canada was Public Health Commissioner. He my home and my children felt that had only been in office for a few way too. I have five children and months when he died of a heart seven grandchildren. attack. My mom then went to I had only one sister and she work as a public health nurse in died of cancer in 1987. My mom the public school system. asked me, "If I left my house to you, what would I hope your year goes well. Please you do?" I told her I would move to feel free to stop in for a visit. Canada - at that time 1 was teaching in Houston, Texas. She met Franklin through a 1 am now a Canadian citizen. 1 cousin who was our landlord at am a Unitarian and practice the time. They started correspon- Buddhism. ding in 1950, and then visiting 1 hope that your first year goes each other. Pop, as I called him, well. Please feel free to stop in for a worked at Mutual Life and had visit. I have a stream running never been married at 55. In through my basement. It's always Jordan Jocius August 1952 they were married fun to live on campus and I love SPOT OF TEA? - Mary Jo Guy lives the last and moved in to 46 Bricker at non-Laurier property within the my house. King/University/Albert/Bricker block. 10!￿ FROSH MAILER 2005 Opinion The Cord Weekly Welcome to chronically Get out and cute Waterloo enjoy the party

Take it from a townie when she says size doesn't really matter that much - there's While they're not perfect, Laurier and Waterloo offer lots to see and do in Waterloo opportunities and acceptence for gay students was fully emerged in the cuteness Waterloo. You'll soon discover the towns. By day five of frosh week I that is Waterloo. Even the propri- $1.75 drinks at Phil's and the hip- had transformed into one of those etors of our S&M store are just so ster-heaven vegetarian restau- Brady Bunch look-alikes who had damn sweet. rant/bar/lounge called the Jane MARCOS MOLDES lost their voice cheering and while TANYA DOROSLOVAC I wanted a co-op job in Toronto Bond. And won't catch me My So-called I accepted that the dining hall Bigmouth Strikes Again you because I needed an escape from making out in any Toronto parks QueerLife would never be featured in the chronically cute. So here I am, at night. If you do, you should Toronto Life's Eating and Drinking TORONTO -- I don't feel right in a tiny apartment in the probably call the police because it When I arrived at Laurier in first Guide, I survived off a diet of pitas about writing the Welcome to Gaybourhood, where I have to means that I am being raped. year I was ready to pack my bags and soup. Waterloo piece without coming wrestle my roommate's small terri- Waterloo Park, on the other hand, and move home by day three. I The men on my floor were actu- clean about something first. The er for territorial domination of my is the perfect place for a midnight didn't like Waterloo much, I ally an amazing group of guys. truth this article is, I'm writing own bed — a losing battle. romp in the woodland forest, and 1 thought frosh week looked like a In short, Laurier was and is a from the 27th floor of an apart- I got adventurous and took that hear that the bucket swings are bad summer camp reunion and fairly safe place for members of ment building in downtown little demon out for a walk one pretty good too. my first trip to the dining hall the queer community. Sure it isn't Toronto. I can see a helicopter fly- day. He led me along the city Laurier will offer you arts and reminded me ofan episode ofFear perfect, but it isn't nearly as bad as ing around, there are places actu- streets quite confidently, and I activities and recreation and the Factor. I initially thought it would be. ally don't open past midnight and I assumed he was taking me on a chance to get involved. And if get- The gay com- recognize all the homeless people roundabout tour ofmy new neigh- ting involved isn't your thing, we Waterloo isn't such a bad place, munity here is fairly I pass because there are more than borhood. Turns out he didn't know also offer you the chance to sit on organized. GLOBAL just two. where the hell we were going. He a patio with your friends and aside from the horrible shopping. (Gays, Lesbians or This place is a lot different from peed on every tree in the city and mock the kids that try too hard. Bisexual At Laurier) what I'm used to. I'm spending my got us very, very lost. Important You'll figure it out. runs a weekly summer away from Waterloo for lesson number one: never trust a If studying is what you're here to Most of all, though, I was scared social/discussion group and there the first time. I'm a townie. guide that eats entire pinecones. do, you're in luck: Waterloo is a that as a gay city slicker I would are groups outside of the universi- The point is, I'm not town full of academics. Mostly we either be socially ostracized or be ty as well. GLOBAL is a great place There are actually only three used to getting lost, hope that some of these so-called the victim of a hate crime by the to get connected with other stu- not in Waterloo. 'book-smarts' will be passed on to time midterms rolled around. dents and see what the communi- streets in Waterloo. If anybody There are actually us here at Laurier whilst we grind As a queer individual being in ty has to offer. only three streets in with the engineers from the an environment that is gay-posi- This isn't to say that Waterloo is tells you otherwise they're either Waterloo: University University of Waterloo. Ha! Just tive isn't a preference, it's a neces- some sort of gay sanctuary; homo- Avenue, Albert kidding. You don't actually want to sity. Safety isn't something that phobia is a problem that still lying or trying to take you to Street and King touch any of the engineering stu- can be gambled with whether exists. But what community does- Street. If somebody dents. Many of them have not yet you're queer or not. n't deal with it? Whether you live in Kitchener where you will either be tells you otherwise, discovered the mathematical So there I was on an all-guys Toronto, Montreal or smaller com- they're either lying properties or social benefits of floor worried that my 'loud and munities like here, there are peo- sold to the sex-trade market or or trying to take you antiperspirant. proud' ways were going to get me ple who either don't understand or to Kitchener, where At any rate, welcome to killed. Realizing that my fears were don't agree with queer identity.

subjected to Oktoberfest. you will either be Waterloo - and to Wilfrid Laurier. keeping me in my room I decided Laurier is sort of like a big fabu- sold off to the bur- Try the gelato, find Gen-X and by to do my best to make Laurier feel lous party, but occasionally you Waterloo coddled me as it raised geoning sex trade market or sub- no means stick to University Plaza. a little more like home. come across that loser that invari- me. I lived in Lakeshore, wore jected to Oktoberfest. Either way, We may not be the biggest univer- Thankfully I learned a few ably gets invited or tags along. The Northern Getaway t-shirts and odds are that when morning rolls sity in the biggest city, but you'll things fairly quickly: Waterloo isn't whole party isn't bad, you just dreamt ofone day owning my very around, you're not waking up soon find out just how much size such a bad place (aside from the need to make some allies and own Ford Taurus station wagon. I beside anyone who has all of their matters. There are buckets of horrible shopping - that really learn how to avoid the loser who shopped at Conestoga Mali, got a teeth. chances for good times. I wish you does suck) especially when com- got invited out of sheer pity. job at the Princess Cinema and There are perks to living in good luck and I'll see you around. pared to some other university Letters to the Editor Campus Pictorial

enforced through the designation Referendum-free zone of clearly-marked smoking areas on campus. The university could A referendum is a dangerous way place butt-stops 10 metres away to decide a minority-rights issue. from buildings and out of the way The Canadian government recog- of high-traffic walking paths. nizes this; that's why there have Finally, the university administra- been no referenda on abortion or tion could start actually ticketing same-sex marriage. people who break the 10-metre The issue of smoking on cam- rule. pus affects two main groups: those The current rule, if enforced, who smoke and those who might protects people's freedom to inhale the smoke of others. While I smoke, with the stipulation that favour protecting the second this freedom 'ends at my face.' We group, the decision of whether to non-smokers don't like to walk allow smoking on campus is a through smoke every time we minority rights issue. That's right, leave the Concourse. But we don't smoking is legal in Canada, in want to impose our values on Ontario and in Waterloo. smokers either, we just don't want Recognizing that cigarettes are smoke blown in our face. highly addictive, to ban smoking on campus would cause many an David Alexander inconvenience. The proposed ban WLUSU Director puts smokers living in residence at WLU Senator-Elect risk as they will be forced to get their fix off-campus late at night Letter Jordan Jocius when most other students are Policy: All letters to the editor must be signed and sub- safely at home (or at least in bars). mitted with the author's name, student identifi- cation number, and telephone number. Letters Fast Forward The university should never must be received by 12pm Tuesday on disk, or via e-mail at [email protected] with the sub- have brought this issue to referen- ject heading of 'Cord letter.' Letters must be typed or easily legible and may not exceed 350 dum. Instead, they should enforce words. The Cord reserves the right to edit any Cord Opinion is a glimpse into the future, with this artist's render- letter for brevity and clarity. Spelling and gram- offering you what is already an ideal solution mar will be corrected. The Cord reserves the right to reject any letter, in whole or in part. ing of O-Week. Just kidding, friends. You'll have a great time. But seriously, I that protects smokers and non- The Cord reserves the right not to publish smokers alike: the 10-metre rule. material that is deemed to be libelous or in con- really can't promise there won't be any chain-gang-type scenarios. travention with the Cord's Code of Ethics or The 10-metre rule could be journalistic standards. The Cord Weekly Opinion FROSH MAILER 2005 < 11 The blessings and curses of WLU High Some jackass tells you about Laurier's magentic pull, and how, four years from now it won't want to let you leave

screwed with my head and gave wasting our time with parables of than seven of my friends were semester is over. You'll see a lot of me the boot and now I'm going to his jackassery?" informed, just one week before each other, so get friendly. South Korea to teach English. Listen. I was talking about the convocation, that they had failed Volunteer, or develop a rabid CHRIS CLEMENS Four years ago this would have WLU magnet, way back before I to meet graduation requirements. hatred for volunteering and start

- Grasshopper's Incarnate freaked me out dashing out into went on my narcissistic tangent, Vanishing credit transfers from an anti-volunteer drinking club - it the Real World without a plan or and it's true: this school holds you exchange programs, misinformed doesn't matter which. Meet your

mortgage or trust fund or pants or to its succulent breast with angelic academic advice - the list is as profs and chances are they'll Wilfrid Laurier University is a slip- any of that - but now it seems like hands and tears your face to diverse as it is ridiculous. remember (wow, what a con- pery place that won't let you leave. you the finest logic in the world. shreds with demon-claws at the Learning of their predicament cept!). Troll Waterloo's bars for I usually like to begin with a Possibilities are boundless; life is same time. It doesn't want you to far too late to register for summer familiar faces. Pretty soon you glaring hypocrisy. You see, I'm golden. I'm excited. leave. "You can't leave," it begs and classes, the victimized now post- start to develop a campus identity, speaking as a recent graduate. I cries and screams. pone their plans for the future and a real sense that you belong. This lived for years in the maelstrom of And you can only come sliding back to WLU for the is home and it feels higher education in Waterloo, This school holds you lo its good. Don't see this from the much maligned victory lap in leave - you can never leave. The soaked in liquor and swimming banks on the far September. And, of course, the bond is strong. The pull is worth- through the flood of community succulent breast with angelic side of the river. school rakes in more tuition while. involvement that makes this The demon is in money. Don't leave - you can So when I tell you that I finally school so unique and entertain- hands and tears your face to the bureaucracy, the never leave. Coffers swell on tech- managed to drag ing. myself away administration, as nicalities. from Laurier's shores, adultifled And now, I'm leaving. Doneski. shreds with demon-claws at the lame and cliched as However, the angel in and infinitely better Gone. You should really know that rests than when I that sounds. Laurier's tiny size. WLU High, as arrived - how's that for University Is Not Very Hard©. same time. narcissism? Registering for req- the jokes go. The gorgeous thing - you'll know why the victory is They gave me a piece of paper uisite classes can be about a miniaturized education is bittersweet. This school is a little that says I'm fully qualified to be Now I know what you're think- a nightmarish ordeal at times, and the open-door opportunity to bit S&M, but I wouldn't have want- over-educated, cynical as hell and ing: I happen to be psychic and tumultuously shifting degree grow through relationships with ed it any other way. completely unprepared for the magical, a major perk of a liberal requirements often leave students your peers. Talk to the kids in your working world. Thank you, arts education. "Who is this jack- out in the cold. Stay sharp if you lectures: they won't disappear into Bachelor of Arts degree: you ass," you wonder, "and why is he don't want to be molested. No less the nebulous masses once the For a disease without a cure, time is medicine Fear of the future is a tricky thing, but rest assured that eventually you'll realize that most of it is unfounded and eased by time defences are weak. It was really other people to see, this is more cope with the distance between smile and nod when people offer getting to me once, so I did a little difficult. To date, I have only dis- us, that I will end up on a floor in advice and assurance to your wor- research on it. I discovered that covered one tried and true allevia- rez with no one like me, that my ries and join me in signing your MELISSA KING the syndrome plagues people tion and it isn't something I can classes will be too difficult and life over to time. Through The young and old. It's in the same tame or control, as much as I'd like there's no way I'm smart enough to My worry has not disappeared Looking Glass family as worry, anxiety, appre- to. Unfortunately it's also a rather keep up - only time proving that because, like I said, there is no hension, trepidation and panic, retroactive therapy, but if you can my worries do not come true cure. But, I have given my over- I a have disease called and is also known as fear of the do better I am open to sugges- improves my ailment. worked mind something else to Ihatechange. flares It up when I'm unknown. tions. What I have discovered is I know that things that are focus on, something in which to worn out, tired and I'm with other There is no medicine for this that time keeps the symptoms at meant to be will be and I know trust. things on my mind. It's aggravated malady and there is no cure. bay. that others who have gone before I trust that time continues to by impending doom, a date I've Perhaps this summer even you have succeeded (of pass whether I worry about what it been dreading that gets closer have experienced some of the course the troubled will bring or not. Each time it with every passing second. Smile warning signs. and nod when people offer mind also knows brings a worry unrealized or a so Sometimes it's bad that I think There are many stories of that others have threat faded away, my trust grows myself, 'If I don't fall advice and to just asleep patients with other diseases who assurance and sign failed, too). stronger and my defenses gain a one tonight then day closer will stay positive despite the hard- Knowing these little strength as I begin to battle never come.' It's your life over to time. See? powerful, my ships, who lift up and warm the things is not the my disease once again. disease. hearts of those around them same as feeling It's one ofthose kick-you-when- throughout the treatment and It works like this: each time I them, though, and this particular you're-down infections, too, at its beyond. For Ihatechange, where worry about something - that my bug only targets the heart. So if strongest when my natural no outward symptoms exist for boyfriend and I won't be able to you're in distress this summer,

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I 12J ￿ FROSH MAILER 2005 Opinion |The Cord Weekly The many benefits ofidleness Listen up - this is probably the one and only time a professor will encourage you to be lazy, so you'd better pay attention men and women who never worked and never intended to work; idleness was the defining characteristic of their class. Most of us reading 19th century DON MORGENSON novels are appalled at the suffo- cating atmosphere of such an idle While it may sound as if I am class. But a closer look reveals mocking incoming students, who actually "doing nothing" involved are about to join others, trance- many activities: solving cross word like on the academic treadmill, I or jigsaw puzzles, riding horse- honestly do extol the virtues of back, going to concerts, attending idleness and would urge students poetry readings, having lazy to manage their time efficiently cream tea with friends and dining enough that they can set aside out on a regular basis. Now does time for idleness. Let me make my that sound like "idle?" case. In fact, it is not hard to make a Contributed Photo A traveller on the road to Naples sound case for idleness, just as stopped when he saw twelve beg- Cambridge University Professor LYING AROUND - Follow Ferris Bueller's lead and take some time off. gars basking in the sun. He offered George Watson does in The Wilson night visit to a homeless shelter, Such a negative attitude toward a lira to the laziest of them. Eleven Quarterly. Idleness has an ele- fog is related to the 'activity our work. Doing our thing helps of them jumped up to claim it but gance which in itself is virtuous. It through his alcoholic he idleness at some- ethic,' as the 'work define precisely who we are. he gave it to the twelfth, the idlest. can have a civilizing influence cre- shouted the homeless often disguised Work thing like, "Get a job!" ethic.' To be active (to work) is provides an opportunity to do our Samuel Johnson once wrote: ating a large market of readers, A recent Wilfrid morally acceptable. people thing but it also ensures that "Every person either is, or hopes to collectors of literature and those president of Many you Laurier University, wanting to rec- about to retire are asked, "What and I have a thing to do. Another be, an idler." But where can you who appreciate the fine arts. ognize those of us with 25 years of are you going to do with all your factor is our desperate need to find idlers? Why is it that today Bertrand Russell once wrote: "The

- service to the institution chose to time?" Unfortunately, many of us escape monotony and boredom. nobody is idle cheerfully, honest- leisure class cultivated the arts us all a beautiful Boston rock- simply exchange one set of frantic What we seem to fear is the "terror ly idle by choice? and discovered the sciences; it give ing chair. You should have heard pre-retirement activities for a set of the vacancy" or the "dread of History, though, is filled with wrote books, invented the the voce murmurs - not activi- In Dr. purposeful idleness. A backward philosophies and refined social sotto "I'm of frantic post-retirement the wasteland". Suess's best for a bloody rocking chair," ties. selling book Oh, The Places You'll glance reveals there was always an relations." ready etc. Clearly, few of us thought our- According to Professor Watson, it Go, the worst possible place for idle class with wealth inherited or To be idle is to be at the least selves ready for the cushy but is not difficult to see why there is anyone is the"the waiting place" wealth newly made from clever uninteresting, or at worst, to have a are investments or from corrupt busi- failed. When Alberta Premier reflective idleness of the front such decay in idleness. One fac- where people sitting idly wait- is ness practices. There were always Ralph Klein made his bizarre late- porch rocking chair. tor is the rising cost of living. After ing. Monotony as close to death finishing a degree, taking a year off as we living can get - so we avoid it was a common youthful ambition: by running faster and faster. making new friends, visiting fasci- My wish for all of you, as you join nating places and seeing the us here at Laurier, is the gift of world. Today my students facing whimsy, cultivated in idleness; SAVE 25% OFF debts are impatient and can't wait lengthy periods of reflection, the to get on that treadmill to oblivion quiet repose of contemplation.

- _ _ ROGERS defined as a pattern of rising Though it may sound like heresy, rogers and income and little else. when you make out your schedule Oiaitaf) A second factor is of us for make time for idle- INTERNET many September, achieve our sole identities through ness... the rewards will be many.

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* Offer expires October 31, 2005 and is for those who have not had Rogers'" service within the past 90 days. Offer is subject to error/change at any time without notice, and may not be combined with any other promotion. Certain restrictions apply. Taxes and connection/relocation fees are extra. Cable service discount applies to Analog Basic and Digital Tiersand Specialty Channel Theme packages only. This offer is valid for installation in Rogers cable-wiredareas only and cannot be combined with any other promotion. A Digital Terminal is required to receive Rogers digital services. CRTC linkage rules apply. Offer does not apply to Rogers Yahoo! Hi-Speed Internet Ultra-Lite. Professional installation for Rogers Yahoo! Hi-Speed Internet is $99.95. Basic installation is free. "Rogers, the Mobius Design, Rogers Digital Cable, the other ROGERS and HI-SPEED INTERNET marks, and YOUR WORLD RIGHT NOW are trademarks of Rogers Communications Inc., used under license. YAHOO!;' the Yahoo! logos, and other Yahoo! product and service names are the trademarks and/or registered trademarks of Yahoo! Inc., used under license. WLUP 06/05 The Cord Weekly The Cord turns 80 FROSH MAILER 2005 13

The Ms very own historian Kris Cote turns back the pages on 80 years worth of student volunteer content

KRIS COTE Waterloo College School. The new published in The Cord. So even with the recent increase in ted to Waterloo College. It was Cord Historian Waterloo College was affiliated The second club, the Student Publication fees, The Cord required that the seven girls be with the University of Western Anthenaeum Literary Society, is still a better value today than from the Twin-City area since The Cord Weekly and Wilfrid Ontario and graduates received published papers for its meetings. when it started, not to mention of there were no separate dormitory Laurier University have together their diplomas from Western. These early papers were met with higher quality. facilities for them, and a Dean of developed of a small, one- out Today, Laurier promotes itself as varied success, but its members The first Cord catered to a body Women was appointed. Despite in building seminary, which 1911 a smaller school with an intimate realized the potential that their of only fifty students, so its con- some cries of an "invasion" by the one housed full-time professor atmosphere. In 1926, a similar endeavour held. A committee was tent was very personalized. For men of The Cord, the female colle- and four students. Having gone promotional platform was used, appointed, and the end result was, instance, student illnesses were gians quickly made their presence through the earliest issues of The and a Cord editorial explained that as the first Cord editors described, frequently the subject of news felt by becoming editors and College Cord, as it was at called the the advantages of Waterloo was "printed paper... in your articles. But through The Cord, reporters for the paper. time, to I've begun realize that the College's small size were "the hands today." students and faculty shared their The very nature of The Cord more things the more change, they attention paid to individuals [and] The paper's first editor, Carl F. global experiences. For instance, lends itself to change over time. It stay the same. the personal contact with profes- Klinck, mused in 1926 that the Reverend E. Neudoerffer described is an independent, student-run The first in Lutheran Seminary sors." College Cord's name was not only his experiences in India, as well as organization, that is shaped by Canada, the school initially was The Cord was created in 1926, an attractive alliteration, but also his disdain for Gandhi, while Prof. those who work for it. as the in Just planned conjunction with the and it was built on the foundation an embodiment of its goals. Aksim explained what it had been original Cord staff formed the University of Toronto. However, it of previous attempts. A sporadic Literally, a cord is a "tie that like in Russia during the Bolshevik foundation of the paper in 1926, was later decided that Waterloo bulletin appeared throughout the binds," and the purpose of the Revolution. the students of today (that means would be the ideal location for the school's early years, while two paper was to bind the students to As the school as an institution you) have the chance to shape the school. campus clubs later published the school, and the school to the grew and evolved, so did The Cord. direction of the paper for the next In 1915 the department of papers that were eventually community. In the fall semester of 1929, the 80 years. Waterloo was College created, and turned into The Cord. The On a side note, in 1926 a yearly first female students were admit- it essentially served the role of Squeaker was printed by the Laury subscription to The Cord cost 50 High School. order to confuse In Literary Society, but it was not a cents. In today's terms, that was The Cord Weekly 101 - Cord History things, when the Waterloo College newspaper. Rather, its main pur- $5.28 for only four to eight pages of was To Arts created in 1924, it was pose was to publish jokes and of print and only ten issues. In commemorate The Cord's 80th anniversary, this year's paper will fea- called one Waterloo College while the amusing anecdotes about staff 1927 the subscription cost rose to ture articles detailing decade of the newspaper's history each High School was now called and students. Later these were 75 cents, or $7.85 in today's terms. month (September-April) from Kris Cote, our dedicated Cord Historian. I Shop online for music, movies llfl 1 I and pizza with your OneCard onemall I When you shop online at the OneMall you can have pizza delivered to your door and music downloaded straight to AVHr/il your computer or laptop. And all you need is your Laurier OneCard!

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f//; (r The top 10 things you should r Delving post the sugar-coated, politically correct viewboooks, Features Editor Blair Fo

y now, you're probably sick of getting 'prac­ about who you were in high school or what your par­ ents until now, so it's only natural to miss them and 5. You will develop a substance ab tical' advice from your parents and teachers ents wanted you to do, and start focusing on what the comforts of home. You will definitely miss you really enjoy. Aside from the extra-curriculars, friends from home too, but MSN and a long distance about what university will be like. Let's face You passed high school relatively sober take a variety of classes for your electives. If you're a phone plan will ease the transition. it; most of it's utterly useless. They were in think you'll come to university and B business student, take film. If you're a geography Get your parents to send you care packages; not university how long ago? So, here are the top ten drink in moderation? student, take a language course - your options are only will you feel special but everyone on your floor things you should really know before you venture to Not likely. limitless. will be jealous. Laurier, from your fellow students who've been there In university partying isn't just Ultimately, time is the only thing that will really and lived to tell about it. ends, every single night is an excuse to help you combat homesickness, as you get used to blow off studying. Gravol is no longer 8. Your floormotes will be your best friends your new surroundings and meet fabulous new peo­ an essential breakfast food. ple, it will get less and less difficult to be away from 10. Health Services will replace your mom and worst enemies Laurier is a fairly conservative home. comes to drugs but you will uc:JtuutLcll You will get sick, fracture something or contract an This will most likely be the only time in your life opportunity to smoke many a joint STD in first year, this I can assure you. where you live on a floor with 30 other people that close; it's often used as a pick-up line. Luckily, Health Services and your handy WLUSU you see and hang out with every single day. 6. Relationships don't really exist Just remember to puff off campus, student health plan will be there to save your life, lit­ When it's 3am and you're bored, having that many the disaster that awaits if you're Before I came to university, my mom told me erally. If you don't mind sharing your embarrassing people so close can be a Godsend, but the proximity property green-handed. "don't fall in love until fourth year." health concern in front of students in the busy wait­ will eventually get to you. To re-coup from all the partying, As much as I hate to admit it, she was right. Don't ing room, Health Services can hook you up with free Forget about privacy; you could be mid-action become your drug of choice in the morni1 come into first year planning to meet someone and Tylenol or cold medicine, birth control and doctor's with someone and not only will someone knock, there are lots of places on campus where fall in love, it will only limit the number of people notes when you miss a test or need an extension. they'll try opening the door. Definitely avoid your fix. you do meet. Massage therapy and thiropractic care are almost 'floorcest' (hooking up with someone on your floor) While all this partying sounds great, thE Go to bars, flirt, take someone home and have a completely covered under your health plan too, and as it can and will cause more drama than it's worth. year student realizes that unless done i good time but don't start searching for Mr. or Mrs. there's nothing better than an almost-free massage. Buy a white board and dry-erase markers as these tion, it can lead to failing classes which Right, at least not in first year. will be your main method of inter-floor communica­ won't make it to second year when tl One of the main draws of a relationship is the abil­ tion. Through the good, bad and inevitably ugly, begins at your very own house. 9. Get out there remember you're only living with these people for a ity to have sex in your very own bed but you don't need a boyfriend or girlfriend for that, just a 'friend year so make the most of it. I bet you think you're going to make tons of new with benefits.' 4. 'Broke os o joke' tokes on new friends at university, right? One word of caution though, don't fail for said friend. If you enter into this 'relationship' on the Well, that's true ... if you put yourself out there, so 7. You will get homesick Even though I'd heard people talking premise of casual sex, your partner probably isn't join a campus club, or two. Don't overbook yourself, poor university students were, I always expecting anything more and you don't want to mess but try new things and see what you like. University And that's okay. didn't apply to me. After all, my parents VI something good up. provides an opportunity to start fresh and forget You've spent your whole life living with your par- the bill. ~ Feature 'l"ftE CORD WEEKLY + FROSH MAILER 2005 +15

rd really know before first year Editor Blair Forsyth-Stark offers practical advice every incoming student should know relop a substance abuse problem Wrong. a lot more), Pizza Pizza and Swiss Chalet both deliv­ sible on the topic. You don't have to read them, just I, like every other student, was rudely awakened to er and can be paid for with your OneCard and fatty find a couple of generic sentences that you can work how much things actually cost in the semi-real foods tend to be faster to make so if you're in a hurry into your essay and it will look like you did lots of t1 school relatively sober and so you world. they're usually your first choice. research. ne to university and still be able to For those of you paying for school on your own, Also, your increased alcohol! drug use can lead to This technique is also useful if you try to negotiate 1tion? good luck. strange food cravings at odd hours and 7-11 is right your mark (which you can still do, contrary to what You'll be poorer than poor and every little bit will near campus. your high school teachers told you). partying isn't just reserved for week- make a difference. Aside from the entrance scholar­ 5le night is an excuse to go out and ships, there are also a couple of scholarships and 1g. Gravol is no longer medicine but 1. Nothing, not even this article, can bursaries available only to first -year students so akfast food. 2. ('s get Degrees: check out the academic calendar Laurier sends you fairly conservative campus when it adequately prepare you for first year to see if you are eligible. Even if it's only $100, that's When you're not eating, sleeping, or partying, you s but you will definitely have the almost 5 cases of Lakeport. will occasionally need to go to class in university. smoke many a joint after the bars Ultimately, first year will be what you make of it. Also, look for creative ways to spend your Dining And while your parents and high school teachers .1sed as a pick-up line. You can come to campus completely prepared Hall dollars; buy your bottles of water and juice for have probably stressed how hard the work will be ~r to puff off campus, well away from with the campus map memorized or decide at the mix there instead of spending "real" money. While and how much you will have to study, there are a few 1t awaits if you're caught on Laurier last minute what school to attend and you'll still be there's always the option of a part-time job, you secrets that will make your life easier. handed. just as likely to have an amazing time. might find it a little overwhelming first semester if First, unlike high school, it really doesn't matter om all the partying, coffee will likely What matters most is that you enjoy yourself and you have one because everything will be so new and what your marks are as long as you pass, so don't ug of choice in the morning. Luckily, make the most out of your time here because it goes unfamiliar; it would probably be best to settle in and stress yourself out over the C you got on an exam. places on campus where you can get by so quickly. This will be an experience unlike any get familiar with your new lifestyle before taking on That being said, there are some easy ways to pick other and while you're sure to make mistakes, you'll a job. up free marks. partying sounds great, the astute first also make lifelong memories that nothing can, or 1) Go to your tutorials: most have mandatory alizes that unless done in modera­ should, prepare you for. attendance or participation marks so show up even l to failing classes which means you 3. The Freshman 15 is not an urban if you're hungover and half-asleep. to second year when the real fun 2) Sources: If it's the night before an essay is due, ·ery own house. [email protected] university legend - it's true go to the library and take out as many books as pos- I'm sure by now someone has told you about the 101 - Features a joke' tokes on new meaning Freshman 15, the theory that frosh will gain at least 15 pounds in their first year. The aim of features is to create in-depth human interest stories relevant to Laurier students. No topic is d heard people talking about how Countless things contribute to the inevitable extra untouchable, from sex, drugs and partying to complex moral issues to' cheap spring break vacations. students were, I always assumed it padding: the 'fake money' aspect of your OneCard (it Whatever the issue, features will cover it and make it relevant to Laurier students. ne. After all, my parents were footing doesn't feel like you're spending money so you spend The Cord Weekly

|#FROSH MAILER 2005 Projects 16 Special The Laurier of your future

The Century Plan of 2005-2011 promises the continued growth of Wilfrid Laurier with increasing graduate programs and internationalization, but university leaders are confident our infamous community atmosphere won't change, writes Special Projects Editor April Cunningham

Emilie Joslin

uate professional program- think Maclean's numbers are per- matically." An ambitious "Century Plan" will focus of the campus. and sits in fect, but they help students to He says two exceptions to that carry Laurier - along with our Rosehart notes that a large por- ming (6). Currently, Laurier "Primarily Undergraduate" include Laurier on their shopping rule would be the potential devel- incoming frosh - through their tion of the plan is dedicated to the schools such list." opment of a Faculty of Education next five years. making life easier for students. category with small Allison Trent. So if WLU's Advancement and a Law School. "We're sort of The long-winded plan, released This includes an emphasis on aca- as Mount and positions the univer- staking out those turfs," he says. last May and unanimously demic counseling, an online stu- Then there are what Rosehart Department in the sity carefully enough, Maclean's The Century Plan states that by approved in late June by WLU's dent portal and a new student calls "misfits" category and will eventually describe a grown- 2011, the number of graduate pro- Board of Governors, details the leadership centre. including Brock, Ryerson to stu- grams will increase to at least 30 developments Dan Robert, President of the Laurier. up Laurier prospective university's future to 10. Laurier University To make the move to the dents. But this change will not and PhD programs and initiatives, bringing the school Wilfrid why (WLUSU) thinks Comprehensive category, "every- happen overnight. In fact, the There are several reasons to its centennial year of 2011. Students' Union to to be on board," method of categorization is Laurier is making the leap "Universities, in general, are the continued student focus is one body would have entire Informal talks have foggy- become a more comprehensive encouraged to do this," says Dr. of the most significant parts of the he says. the three "lf you were to ask Maclean's school. A lot of it has to do with Susan Horton, Vice President: plan. "I think it's great that they're already begun among what it takes to go to another cate- actions on behalf of the McGuinty Academic of Laurier and core going to build that community schools. on they probably couldn't give government. facilitator of the plan. "The Rae sense into their academics... and So why all the emphasis gory, you an answer," says Rosehart. "The government's response to Report is more interested in seeing talk about things like Shinerama Maclean's rankings? the change means con- the Rae Report, financially, is to and planning in in the classroom," he explained. According to Rosehart, when To him, accountability have a investment in gradu- The second and possibly more the rankings began approximately tinuing with undergraduate pro- major universities." while developing more ate education," says Rosehart. Although plans are not unusual notable change is what Rosehart ten years ago, only about 15 per- gramming con- graduate numbers at the Waterloo "Part of this is coming out because in the university setting, the describes as "the continued move cent of students and parents Today, campus. Undergraduate growth the double cohort are graduating Century Plan embraces a few cor- to Laurier being a more compre- sidered it in their decision. will be focused at Brantford. Since and want to go on to professional nerstone initiatives that some say hensive university with more almost 75 percent do. of undergradu- and grad programs." the from graduate programs." "I must admit, I'm not 100 per- 1998, the number are going to bridge gap And money is undoubtedly 'comprehensive' cor- cent convinced about Maclean's ate students at Laurier-Waterloo the old to the new Laurier. The word to is sup- has nearly doubled. Now that beginning to flow. According "It's a combination of what I call responds with one of the cate- because most of the data universities number will begin to level off. Rosehart, over the past two years, big ticket strategic items and a zil- gories used in the annual plied by individual formal "We might replace some of the the government has dedicated $18 lion little items," says Dr. Robert Maclean's rankings of Canadian (and not gathered through but students with graduate students," million to graduate education. Rosehart, President of WLU. He universities. The Century Plan research methods], it's defi- that we can't he says, referring to the Waterloo says there are two significant defines the category as having a nitely a factor campus. "The number [of under- Century Plan. The focus on liberal arts and science, ignore," he says. thrusts of the - see CENTURY, page 17 various grad- Horton thinks similarly. "I don't grads] might decline, but not dra- Please first is to reinforce the student- "complemented" by The Cord Weekly Special Projects FROSH MAILER 2005 17 Leaders dream of

"The government's response To the "We need to make the changes that "Everyone recognized that we need "I don't think it's a move away from Rae Report, financially, is to have a we think are essential to Laurier's to preserve and enhance our cur- undergrad students. It's more of a WLU's major investment in graduate edu- future development... We want the rent strengths... You don't sacrifice broadening... I think it will offer a cation... IfLaurier doesn't do this, best of both worlds." what you do well and what you're pretty well rounded packagfor the we're going to leave money on the known for." university." table." Dr. Susan Horton, Vice President: tomorrow Academic Dr. David McMurray, Dean of Dari Robert, President and CEO Dr. Robert Rosehart, President Students ofWilfrid Laurier University and Vice Chancellor Students' Union

Law school, teaching college planned to bolster WLU grad studies

- From CENTURY, page 16 "You don't want people doing you're known for," he says. Internationalization. Eventually, place on St. Michael's campus, research to be less available in the He notes that one of the main Horton would like to see a Laurier across the street from Waterloo's Next year that number will rise $71 classroom," she says. reasons why students choose where five percent of students are main campus at King and million. Following that a $179 mil- But Horton admits the 'best of Laurier is the sense of community international visa students and University streets. The Dr. Alvin lion cheque will be written out to both worlds' syndrome will be a and campus life. He believes this is cumulatively 10 percent have Woods Building (or the DAWB, as Ontario graduate programming. challenge. "There is a trade off and generated through a combination international academic experi- many students call it) will be com- This is all new money, which it's something I worry about," she of efforts by students, faculty and ence. This number would be high- pletely gutted and remodeled this makes administrators like says. staff, but is ignited by residence er in business, and lower in music year. Some aesthetic development Rosehart salivate. But, "these days for young facul- life. and science. is also planned, as an avenue of "If Laurier doesn't do this, we're ty to make progress in their pro- "About 80% of first year students Horton says that although trees will be planted at the going to leave money on the fession, they need to make live in residence," he says, "so you Laurier already has a good inter- University Avenue entrance and a table," he says. He assures that research. And good research can start your university career living national reputation (the university new gateway to King Street is cre- current undergrads are not paying inform what goes on in the class- together." It is also the geographi- hosted a UN conference in April of ated. The Brantford campus will for a plan that pushes them out of room... it's something worth cal closeness of the campus that this year), more improvements also have renovations done for focus. It will mainly be govern- doing." creates a high level of interaction, can be made. additional office, residence and ment and research council sup- She says that the goal will be to he adds. "We live in an area in Ontario athletics space. port, he says. explain to new faculty that a stu- One of the major initiatives in that is heavily impacted by trade," The Century Plan promises Additionally, the plan notes that dent focus is important, no matter the Century Plan that will help to she says. "We need the ability to much and when all is said and one advantage of being a compre- how research-intensive the uni- reinforce the student focus as interact with other cultures." done, huge amounts from the hensive university is that we don't versity becomes. Laurier evolves is the Learning "You can learn more about public purse will be spent. Horton have to compete with smaller Yet there are still concerns that Services project. An Information organizational behaviour in China has created an "accountability schools in the primarily under- students will be pushed out of Commons will be set up in the by going there and talking to the matrix" which will be reviewed graduate community. These small focus and education will become Library beginning in September managers than by reading it in a periodically as an action plan. This schools have the ability to offer second priority to the prestige of with a central academic advisor to textbook," she says as an example will also help with government more individualized experience. research. direct students to the help they for MBA students. funding, which will be the main With a gradual shift towards a "People sometimes joke and require. This will hopefully reduce Robert believes that interna- resource for initiatives. more research-intensive universi- talk about old Laurier and new the "run-around" that many stu- tional initiatives will enrich the Rosehart believes that "it's going ty, opportunities for grants and Laurier," she says. "Sometimes dents currently get between already broad extra-curricular to be a long road to where the funding could benefit the school they are worried about the departments. experience of Laurier students number of graduate students is as whole. change." One of the first new arms of that he sees in WLUSU volunteers. dramatically increased." Horton says there are several TheWLUSU President, however, Learning Services will be a Math "The more that you can gain out of And as the campus continues to areas where Laurier is currently is not worried. "I don't think it's a Aid Centre, located in the Bricker your university experience above evolve, questions remain as to lacking which could be aided by a move away from undergrad stu- Academic Building. The existing and beyond an academic degree is whether the infamous communi- burst of research activity which dents. It's more of a broadening," Writing Centre will also be a part great," he says. ty' will remain as embedded in our place the university behind the says Robert. "I think it will offer a of the service. McMurray says the On a campus that knows the campus as our leaders believe. mark both financially and reputa- pretty well rounded package for Learning Commons office in the experience of construction all too tion-wise. "We need to make the the university." Library will be a place where stu- well, building development and [email protected] changes that we think are essential Dr. David McMurray, Dean of dents can feel comfortable seeking expansion will continue with to Laurier's future development," Students, is confident that the help with things like changing extensive construction set to take says Horton. "We want the best of plans for student-focus will help their major and ensuring they are both worlds." maintain Laurier's current "com- in the right program or taking the Cord Weekly - Horton says that it there will munity" in spite of increased grad- right courses for their career goals. The 101 Special Projects remain an emphasis on under- uate work. Orientation Week will include a Special Projects covers a large-scale subject every four weeks. Each graduate learning even though "Everyone recognized that we mandatory session on the project presents an in-depth analysis of an issue or current event that students' profs may be balancing need to preserve and enhance our Learning Services project. affects students at Laurier using investigative reporting and objective research projects at the same time current strengths... you don't sac- Another exciting focus of the news-style writing. Subjects will vary from university finances to inter- as teaching. rifice what you do well and what plan is a movement towards views of unique individuals to student crises.

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~'°" 1 1C Visit www.mylaurier.ca/hub to learn more about what The HUB can do for you! 18￿FROSH MAILER 2005 International The Cord Weekly] Going abroad with LINT Laurier International (LINT) gives students an opportunity to get a taste for travelling and studying abroad in over 70 foreign locales

Brandon Currie

HEADS IN THE CLOUDS - These two exchange students enjoy a warm spring afternoon atop a mountain in Alicante, Spain, one of the many places LINT sends WLU students.

TONY FERGUSON with the global economy changing completed her sociology degree Africa, Zimbabwe, Swaziland and change to the program for next International Editor and the world becoming more from Laurier, says that LINT's rep- Ghana. It was interesting for Becky year. Dr. Al Hecht, who was the interconnected, it's important to utation was one ofthe reasons she to hear what these people from program director for the past 6 Since 1994, Laurier International be able to study at a foreign insti- chose Laurier. In third year, she the other side of the world had to years, will be stepping down. Dr. (LINT) has been giving Laurier tution. went on exchange to South Africa say, including one girl's intense Hecht did a lot of work with LINT, students the opportunity to study With more than 70 institutions where she studied at the dislike for white Afrikaners, a establishing almost 70 percent of abroad. Although the program has worldwide to choose from, stu- University ofKwa-Zulu Natal. product of the post-apartheid the programs available to students come a long since then with way dents who plan to go on exchange "Overall it was a really positive region. as well as making the first connec- 102 students leaving the country have a wide variety of opportuni- experience," she said as she For students considering the tion between Laurier and German to study up from 14 when it start- ties. recalled some of the moments exchange program, Dabrowska institutions. ed, the objective has remained the "This is the best time in your life from her trip. Meeting new people has some advice. "It's always good Dabrowska feels that the pro- same: global awareness. to explore," says Dabrowska. "If and learning in a different envi- to know another language," she gram ultimately "makes us better "This is an eye opener," says you are going to do it, do it right ronment were among some of the explained. Even ifyou are studying people... we become stronger Ewa Dabrowska, International now because later on you might be overall highlights of the trip for in English, it would be wise to pick people because we have experi- Staff/Student Co-ordinator for working for a company or busi- Becky. up another language for basic enced a different situation." LINT. "The most important part of ness and you would not have an Residence life at the University communication on the street, she [the program] is the global per- opportunity to travel." ofKwa-Zulu Natal was diverse, her added. tferguson @cordweekly.com says spective." Dabrowska that Becky Ambrose, who has now roommates coming from South Meanwhile, there is a big WLU and the world: international clubs

There are many opportunities to get involved For all the activists out there, Laurier has a variety of clubs for students who want internationally at Laurier to roll up their sleeves and help out

JACQUELINE MARTINZ multiculturalism on campus. This JESSICA PETER organization, with more than 1.8 refugees at Laurier, both Burmese, Cord International Cord International past year the German Club cele- million members at last count, and both active WUSC members. brated Oktoberfest in October, the and has a branch at Laurier. It Besides welcoming new refugees, a is When September arrives, the Caribbean Club played cricket Laurier as community fights for human rights as well as WUSC also raises awareness in extremely interested in helping majority of first-year students are matches, East meets West show- SAS, but in all aspects of life. development issues, meets with out. preoccupied with the start of cased the Indian marketplace with It's obvious by the stiffcompe- Amnesty focuses on the promo- other WUSC councils, and sends tition position school. However, taking some "Indian Bazaar" and the for any volunteer tion of human rights for all people, one student a year to an interna- on campus. But if feeling time to discover what Laurier has Association of Black Students set you're and the combating of abuses to tional summer volunteer pro- unfulfilled by the on-campus to offer (other than a hefty course up a tent in the Fred Nichols these rights through letter writing gram. to help, or if com- load) can be beneficial both aca- Campus Centre and braided other opportunities and other forms of support. These clubs are always looking munity oriented involvement isn't demically and personally. High on students' hair. According to Helal for new members with there are a the list of options to consider is Fattal, president of the Muslim your thing, also few always that international international activist groups These clubs are no, campus clubs. Students Association, "We try to activist spirit (and worth looking into. Campus clubs provide positive help new students settle in by you don't have to be in DREAMS, or Dominican looking for new members interaction with others and the introducing them to people and Global Studies to join!). chance to develop friendships. providing community informa- Republic Education and Medical with that international If activism closer to They help ease the transition from tion." Support started with groups of home is more your style, students fundraising and traveling high school to university and can In terms of political clubs, there activist spirit consider such clubs as to the Dominican Republic to provide you with some useful con- are the Political Science Habitat for Humanity, build schools and other buildings tacts. Of the nearly seventy cam- Association and World Affairs LSPIRG (Laurier for impoverished communities. It pus clubs at Laurier a large num- Society. These clubs are open to Last is the club I know best. 1 am Students for a Public Interest has since expanded; DREAMS at ber are concentrated on interna- anyone simply interested in the an executive member of WUSC Research Group), the Laurier is one of its extensions. tional events and cultures. Aside rest of the world. Both clubs are (World University Service of Environment Club, and LSETA Students Against Sweatshops from the activist-driven ones, affiliated with the political science Canada), which focuses on inter- (Laurier Students for the Ethical (SAS) on the rights of there are cultural clubs and politi- department and accept an unlim- focuses national development and is root- Treatment of Animals). workers who are exploited by cal clubs. ited number of members. ed in Canadian universities them- Where ever your interests lie, in sweatshops. Among the cultural clubs are The Political Science major corporations selves. The most visible thing either internationally or closer to As an executive member of the the Association of Black Students, Association organizes debates, WUSC brings to the community is home, there are a lot of opportuni- Laurier branch "We work to the Caribbean Club, the Chinese discussions, and trips to political says, the sponsorship of student ties to get involved at Laurier. show that the factories are need- Students Association, the German centres while the World Affairs refugees (with the support of stu- ed... it's the unfair and unjust Club, the Jewish Students Society (WAS) participates in dents). that are Association, the Ukrainian Klub, model UN discussions. wages and conditions There are currently two student must cor- the Muslim Students Association, Past conferences include the appalling and what be

rected." The Maquila Solidarity - the Laurier Chinese Christian McGill Model United Nations and The Cord Weekly 101 International is a source of SAS's Fellowship, the Laurier Christian the World Model United Nations. Network great East West information. SAS Laurier helps Fellowship, and meets President Aamir Taiyeb says of The Internationalsection lets regular readers of The Cord know what's going sessions, (which honours Indian tradition). WAS, "we have even better stuff through letter writing on in the world and connects it to what's happening on campus. Since The movie These clubs allow students from planned for this year, and a brand Buy Nothing Day, nights, Cord is a weekly paper, this section provides a week in review of important SAS Week and other awareness- The section also students with news about similar backgrounds to come new web site. Everyone, no matter international events. provides events. international news on campus, such as the arrival of guest speakers or together and hold annual events their or discipline, can raising year get important events being held by one of the international campus clubs. to raise awareness and promote involved." Amnesty International is a large I The Cord Weekly International FROSH MAILER 2005 19 VE-Day honoured in Moscow amidst protest

ALEXANDRA STADNYK national self-determination as Eastern European Correspondent Soviet oppression suppressed much of the cultural, political and KIEV, UKRAINE - On May Bth social distinctness each independ- many world leaders arrived in ent nation held. Moscow to celebrate the 60th The Soviet powers trounced anniversary of the allied victory human rights, individual, national over Hitler. Celebrations in and religious rights. People living Moscow included a mass parade under Soviet rule had to suppress on Red Square, where top world their culture and conform to the leaders including US President Soviet expectations that were George W. Bush, watched on. Not in attendance were Not in attendance were the the Estonian and Lithuanian Presidents Estonian and Lithuanian who were boycotting the celebrations in an attempt Presidents who were to remind the rest of die world that the end of boycotting the celebrations. World War II marked the beginning of Soviet occupation in strictly imposed upon them. For Eastern Europe for half a century. instance, the Russian language Despite protests in Poland, was standardized in Russia's satel- Polish President Aleksander lite countries. Also, the Russian Kwasniewski attended, but his Orthodox Church was adopted as presence was not supported by the main religion, specifically in the Polish people. Advertisements Ukraine. criticizing his attendance were The eastern European and broadcasted in objection. Baltic nations are just now finally After the allied victory ofWorld emerging as free and democratic War 11, brutal Soviet occupation nations. The 60th anniversary of followed in the Baltic and eastern the allied victory is not a celebra- nations of Europe. In Ukraine for tion for those who were subjected example, the victory was marred to live under treacherous Soviet by the replacement of one tyranny occupation for over half a century, by another. The collapse of Hitler but rather acts as a reminder that and Nazi Germany did not mean the end of World War II and the freedom and peace for all. Instead, bringing down of Hitler was the Ukrainians were forced to submit beginning of many years of subju- and live under Soviet rule for half a gation and foreign domination. century. They had to fight for

Contributed Photos TOP: US President Geroge Bush enjoyes the parade with Russian President Vladimir Putin. BOTTOM: A "Major" change to Russian war veteran shouts out slogans in protest. Global Studies program

Students can now pursue Global Studies as its own individual major WELCOME TO TONY FERGUSON movements in the next month to International Editor start in September. Students who are currently in The Global Studies program at now LAURIER! the program have the option Laurier has undergone a major of continuing with it as is, or transformation, so to speak. It is upgrading to the new version. now a stand-alone program which The revamped program has a LOOKING FOR A PART-TIME JOB FOR FALL 2005? allows students to select it as their new placement program called only major. Previously, students 'The New Global Studies had to pair it with another pro- Experience.' This program recog- WHAT ABOUT A SUMMER JOB IN 2006? gram, and often complained of nizes that many Global Studies having to choose a joint honours placements may be within program that they really weren't Canada, available to both interested in. Canadian and International stu- "The best for students is that dents. The program allows stu- they can now focus on GS is a way dents to have the opportunity to that wasn't possible for them travel and visit regions to help before," says Dr. Len Friesen, local communities. "This is anoth- Associate Professor and Co-ordi- er way we're trying to increase the nator of the program. "This now possibilities for our students," says gives them what they want," he Friesen. says. The program is "highly student The program, which is now up friendly" according to Friesen. and running, has already acquired "We try to open up unique per- new staff and the coordinators spectives on the world, and in a View postings in Career Services or electronically via plan on adding more in the future. way that combines a number of This is something they "simply disciplines," he says. The Global the Web site at www.wlu.ca/career. must do" in order to keep up with Studies department also believes the growing levels of student that it's possible to face the world enrollment. and to become engaged in the One Global Studies professor, search for solutions that are need- Career Services r Adam Davidson-Harden, who was ed to solve pressing problems. highly successful in one course "That's our hope, at least," he 232 King Street North that he taught last year, has been added. added to the list of full-time staff. (519) 884-0710, ext. 4194 or 4495 Laurier Career Services The GS department is also look- the cons. one ot a great career tfergiison@cord weekly, con ? ing to hire a specialist in refugee 20 I ￿FROSH MAILER 2005 Frosh Student Life |The Cord Weekly]

The battle of the bulge

The freshman bulge is that dreaded extra weight that creeps up on you during first-year, better known as the 'freshman 15.' The easiest way to prevent gaining weight is to know how to avoid it before entering university, writes student health expert Jennifer O'Neill

Eating on campus with light italian dressing or mus- your room for snacks. Rest Don't stress tard for sauce. When going to restaurants the In Dining Hall, watch way to is The Dining Hall can be your best the your safest save calories order- Young people need between 8-10 A bit of harmless weight gain is no portions. The stir-fry and pasta ing vegetarian; it's also the cheap- friend or your worst enemy. The hours of sleep per night according reason to panic. Our bodies are meals are larger than one portion, est. key to eating healthy on campus is to Health Canada. This isn't suposed to change as we approach splitting it in half and saving to know and understand what try always possible when living in res- our twenties. The most important the rest for a snack. Exercise you're putting in your mouth. great idence but do try to aim for aspect of this period of time in Put simply, think before you eat. between seven to eight hours. your life is the education for which campus Laurier's Athletic Complex just Comfort food is easy and quick, Off Sleep is vital to maintaining good you're dishing out thousands of went through a major renovation - but not the healthiest decision. health, lower stress levels and dollars. Some students forget this, Ordering pizza will become tradi- take advantage of it! Never again There are certain foods that being able to focus in class. becoming terribly preoccupied when living residence. will live less than one minute should be eaten strictly as a treat, tion in you This being said, living a healthy with weight and appearance. Don't let this become a habit. The from the gym. making excus- or better yet, not at all. Quit life does not necessarily mean liv- Just have fun, meet some great trick is to by Bpm every es and to the for at Stay away from Harvey's pou- stop eating try to get gym ing a boring life. people and learn something. As or two 30 minutes, times a tine and fries; instead try a small night hours before you go least three You can have a healthy first-year long as you're healthy and active, to bed. This means avoid late night week. If don't like the beef burger or vegetarian burger you gym, get without compromising any don't worry about putting on extra pizza and candy study parties. a group of friends together and go with a salad. When heading to Mr. important experiences. Listen to pounds. If you are up late to on a walk or (Waterloo Park is a Sub or Pita Shack stay away from staying jog your body think about what you Trust me. You'll have plenty of study and you are feeling hungry, great place for jogging). This will the mayonnaise and other fatty eat and get moving. It's a simple other things to stress about in first cut or a to meats and sauces. Instead try lean try up fruits and vegetables also be good way clear your recipe for a healthy and bulge free year. keep some whole grain cereal and head and get some fresh air. meats such as chicken or ham year. (whole-wheat) crackers stored in Hungry? Here's what to bring to residence

LAURIE SADOWSKI Residence kitchen must-haves: canned veggies, beans, soups or for vegetarians who need to be Three quick tips for eating on a Food for Thought fruits, single-serve applesauce, ultra creative with their diets. first-year student budget: Electric kettle (under $10, Wal- cereal bars, cereal, dry milk (just Anticipation awaits as you settle * Mart) add water, and it doesn't go sour), Refridgerator Buy things in bulk: head to Bulk into your new University abode. spices, nuts and much more. Barn (at Erb and Weber St.) on Give mom and dad a kiss goodbye This is an essential for comforting Do yourself a favour and rent a Wednesday to receive 10% off with and close the door. oatmeal, filling 'just-add-water' George Foreman Grill ($2O for Coldex fridge from the school for student ID, or ask ma and pa to Then you hear it. It starts with a soups, tea, coffee, and so much small, Wal-Mart) the year. These mini-fridges are make a trip to Costco before you soft grumble, then becomes loud- more. extremely handy, even if it's just go. You might feel silly stashing er and louder until you just can't Allowed in kitchens only, this baby for beer and gin. 150 single serve applesauces take it anymore. Can opener (dollar store) can grill anything. It's quick, easv- under your bed, but they'll be You're hungry. And all alone. to use, low-fat and creates tasty Pots and pans there when you want them, and There will be days when it's cold Beans can make a nutritious addi- meals (especially if you can't it'll keep shopping to a minimum. or raining, or when you don't have tion to any salad or wrap; soups cook). Invest promptly. Keep it in Because you still have a commu- time to hit the Dining Hall. Every * can be thrown in a communal your room, but use it in the com- nal kitchen, bring at least one pot Check out grocery flyers online at now and then, you'll feel like one microwave; juice is economically munal kitchen. and a frying pan for heating up a sobeys.ca and zehrs.ca for good more pita will push you over the sold in frozen cans and tuna is a variety of meals. deals. edge. Sure, you can go the easy great plus to any sandwich or Hand blender ($lO, Wal-Mart) route with bags of cookies, granola * salad. Condiment Packets Noname brands almost always bars, candy and pop. But you Perfect for whipping up quick taste the same as the popular know those 15 pounds will creep Non - perishable items breakfast smoothies (yogurt or Packets of mustard, mayo, brand name. Just check the ingre- up with mass beer consumption, food tofu, milk, soy, fruit), pureeing ketchup, et cetera are non-perish- dients. so don't give it a head start. Anything canned and sealed that sauces or dressings, or feeding the able and can be stolen from any Instead, invest in some handy- has a far away due-date makes a urge for some good old fashioned major fast food chain, plus you dandy kitchen tools, whether you great plan b meal. Best bets: Jell-o pudding. This is a must-have don't have to refrigerate them. have a kitchen or not. The Cord Weekly Frosh Student Life FROSH MAILER 2005 21 Couples: beware the 'turkey dump' How significant is your 'other?' A friendly warning about break-up season at Laurier, brought to you by Sex and the UniverCity

could be a particularly lucrative yourself suddenly fighting off the time for you. But if you're in any opposite sex with a stick. But ask kind of relationship, whether it's yourself: is it worth it? Does this long distance or not-enough-dis- person really care about me? Is MICHELLE PINCHEV tance, beware. Your happy union is this about dissatisfaction in my Student Life Editor at risk. current relationship or is this Within the two major categories about my own insecurities? Laurier students come with many are several smaller groups, some Before you throw away a good labels; we identify by program, of which overlap. People who are thing, make sure you are sure. year, culture or the clubs and dating, for example, can pass as To further complicate things, in sports with which we whittle away either single or taken. If someone some cases your "other" may be our free time. To the untrained eye at a party has been hitting on you somewhere else; either back at there are dozens of sub-groups relentlessly, it could quite conven- home, comepletely unable to but essentially students can be ient to say that you're seeing empathize with the whirlwind of lumped together into two major someone. But if the object of your changes you're experiencing or at categories: single and not single. affection suddenly sends a different college or university you the green-light, doing God-knows-what. Part of Fights, tears and rebound sex you're free as a bird. you assumes the worst and so it's If you're of the second natural that you're inclined to do are all too common during group, the "taken" vari- God-knows-what as well. ety, things can get a little The best advice I could give you turkey dump season. bit more complicated. is to never make assumptions but, In the blur of academic as much as possible, go with your at Laurier, Upon arriving partic- and social pressures and in some gut (unless you are a neurotic or ularly week, during Frosh you will cases, alcohol consumption, we paranoid person in which case, become familiar with the term can sometimes lose track of who don't). turkey dump. This refers to the we are and what matters the most Some couples make it. Most will oftime to period (usually mid late to us. If you're deeply committed experience a rough patch in the October) during which the sound to someone, don't be naive. Come beginning at the very least, but if can of hearts breaking be heard all to school prepared, realizing that you make it, you and your other throughout campus. Fights, tears you're young and things can should feel very proud. If you sur- sex are and promiscuous rebound change very quickly in the life of a vive turkey dump season, you can all during the too common notori- student. pretty much start planning the ous turkey dump season. But ifyou truly don't want this to wedding. If you're single, you're lucky; this happen to you then stay ground- ed; you may suddenly find [email protected] Your guide to swanky uptown

WATERLOO

SIERRA LEEDHAM shows progressive mainstream Specializing in urban street easy to find with signs pointing King Street is Generation X, a Cord Intern films and boasts two theatres with wear from a variety of independ- you up a set of stairs. Boasting a video rental store located at 10 more modern seating and sound. ent and well-known designers, collection of accessories including Regina Street North. The main rea- If you were to walk down King A membership can be pur- Loop is known to hold special bags, hats, shoes, and watches son to shop at Gen X, as it's more Street but five years ago, you chased for eight dollars, which is events, be it a concert at the they have many unique pieces commonly known, is the vast would be hard-pressed to find any valid at both locations. With the Starlight or the mysterious Goat that are sure to impress as most selection. Employee Heather of characteristic its trendy shops, yearlong membership, you will Face Ball - an event where partici- items in Thryve are not available Walker has explained that Gen X as recently a lot has been done to receive three dollars off admission pants signed up, paid a fee and anywhere else in Kitchener- caters to "more demographics transform uptown Waterloo into every time you see a film. showed up atLoop in formal dress Waterloo. While many of the items than chain rental stores," and has the swanky shopping district it is Admission for non-members at to be taken to a secret location for are pricey, the attention you may "a lot of films that are included in today. the original is nine dollars and ten an all-inclusive party. receive while wearing them is university film courses, and low With uptown Waterloo so close at the twin, making the member- Loop also has a station where priceless. rental rates and late fees." to campus, there is no excuse ship well worth the price. you can have custom clothing Beside Thryve is 360 Degree If you are looking to watch an old (especially since you'll have a bus Across the street from the origi- made. There is more to buy than Clothing. All students can appreci- classic, Gen X is your place. If it's pass) not to hop on the number nal Princess is Orange Monkey, just clothing, with art always for ate great used clothing for a bar- bad or trashy films you're after, bus, or seven walk down and located above Jane Bond. Orange sale. While the interesting clothing gain. 360 is full of stylish, second- look no further. There are entire explore Waterloo's main drag. Monkey is an amazing independ- does not come cheap, it's worth a hand pieces perfect for students sections dedicated to cult and Downtown Kitchener has pleasur- ent record store that specializes in look. on a tight budget. trashy films, even Anime. as well, even able shopping and vinyl. You can fine used classic Walking further south down Walk a little bit further south So while Waterloo may not be though it's a little further from records for less than five dollars; King, you come across Delirium. It and you encounter Gloss. If you the most exciting place in the campus, it's worth the trip. perfect for building your own vinyl specializes in alternative clothing are looking for "fitted Northern world, it is shaping up to be a great Walking south downKing Street, collection. for both men and women and European" styles, Gloss is your place to shop and be entertained. one of the first places you're likely The kind staff at Orange hosts many different labels place. While some items are If you know where to look, you are see is Princess Cinemas. While the Monkey will gladly order in any including a specialized, in-store affordable under a student's budg- sure to find interesting and unique original is justoffKing on Princess record or single that you desire, for line of clothing. There is a large et (especially the transfers), many items upon your fall arrival. Street, at 46 King is the Princess a reasonable price. They also sell selection of interesting and items may be out ofreach. Twin, making the two locations tickets for local concerts, buttons, unique handbags available in all Close to all the shopping on Kitchener-Waterloo's only inde- patches, Orange Monkey t-shirts shapes and sizes, and also has pendent cinemas. and posters. many kitschy accessories that The Cord Weekly 101 - Student Life The original Princess shows Located in the same building as make great gifts. Students and life; that covers pretty much everything at Laurier. The mainly independent films on its the Princess Twin is If you cross the street and walk Loop Student Life section aims to making living as a student as easy as pos- single screen, and specializes in to be more down a block, will find Clothing. Loop inspires you Thryve. sible with articles and advice on health, sex, shopping, food, astrology foreign and art house features. The a its than just clothing store with While they do not have a street and much more. newly opened Princess Twin slogan 'Lounge. Gallery. Culture.' front display, they are relatively 22￿ FROSH MAILER 2005 Sports The Cord Weekly Football rules at WLU At a school of incessant cheering, the football field offers a legitmate excuse to scream yourself senseless

MIKE BROWN ty football for American schools, Sports Editor but Wilfrid Laurier, as you may well know, is in Canada. We don't Varsity football; it's one of the even have thousands upon thou- sacred hallmarks of university life. sands of students. Our stadium is Pub-crawls, spats between moderately less state-of-the-art, roommates, late night trips to though I know of few that trans- Pizza Pizza and MacDonnell form so readily into a baseball dia- - Village these will all be common- mond for my beloved Monday place by the end of your first year night 3-pitch games in November. at Laurier. Differences aside, varsity foot- But there's just something spe- ball at Laurier is still very much an cial about varsity football. experience. It is perhaps the only I'm sure Hollywood has sport that garners much fan sup- ingrained us all with a passable port at WLU, and is definitely the understanding of the varsity foot- most closely followed. Last year, ball experience. We envision University Stadium was full to hoards of dedicated students tak- capacity to watch a thrilling Yates ing a break from the books to Cup (the provincial championship enjoy a few cold beers from the game) comeback victory by the back of their buddy's Bronco boys in purple and gold against because, after all, anyone that says the McMaster Marauders. drinking heavily at 2 pm is wrong In fact, I draw a blank when I try is clearly just an overcompensat- event to think of a single that unit- Graham Folkema ing alcoholic worthy of our pity. ed the Laurier populace more - celebrates after knocking off the defending OUA Eventually, these lovable foot- than the successful football sea- BACK TO BACK? Last year's football squad moments Marauders for the Ontario title. This year's squad looks strong to repeat. ball aficionados meander into a son. champion McMaster stadium unfailingly packed with It's really simple. quite in OUA (Ontario Can't discern between a touch- Windsor. If all goes well, the Yates thousands upon thousands of fans ed University Everyone loves telling their Athletics) play. This year, we only down and an interception? No Cup final will be here in Waterloo before cheering their team on with friends from back home how vast- lose six players and are sure to be a worries. Just cheer when your fel- on November 12. I already have unparalleled zest (except of course ly superior Laurier is to the school competitor to win Ontario again, if low Hawks do and your more plans to be at both, and I highly by the opponents' fans who forego they foolishly opted for. Given the we manage to hold off the peren- sport-sawy cohorts will be none suggest you start making some studying in favour of a shockingly of preeminent position varsity Marauders and the wiser. If the games are even too. similar age-old ritual). nially strong football and the skill of the Laurier Western Mustangs. half as exciting as last year, it will Now, for all those non-geogra- we Hawks have plenty of squad, It's certainly shaping up to be a take a pretty dedicated sports- [email protected] phy majors out there, Hollywood boasting to do. great season on the field, but you hater to have a bad time. is in the States. I can't deny the Last year's team lost 14 players don't even have to be a sports fan The home opener is slated for accuracy of this depiction of varsi- and still managed to go undefeat- to enjoy a Laurier football game. Saturday, September 10 against Varsity sports at a glance Sports for

The Cord takes a look at which teams are worth having a look at and which might non-athletes be best to pass by as we enter the new season Laurier intramurals - what's offered and how to get

MIKE BROWN sure for the hockey program, the The Worst involved Sports Editor new class ofrecruits should fill the void left by departing veterans Men's volleyball JENNIFER O'NEILL in a sporting environment. and national From provincial including OUA Player of the Year, Unlike their female counterparts, Staff Writer Registrations for these leagues are championships to winless seasons Cindy Eadie. 2004-05 was a year to forget for the all done through your residence streaks, and double-digit losing men's volleyball team. On the plus Do you love sports, but don't want house council. 2004-05 was an up-and-down year Women's lacrosse side, they snapped a 17-game los- the commitment ofa varsity team? The other option is getting for Golden Hawks' varsity athletes. The ladies of lacrosse claimed ing streak to end the year with Well, you're in luck. Getting involved in intramurals through Here's a look at Laurier's teams, their second consecutive provin- back-to-back wins and the youth- involved in sports at Laurier is eas- the Athletic Complex. The choices

to - from the top of the nation the cial banner with an 11 1 season infested squad showed some ier than a grueling, often disap- include ice hockey, basketball, vol- bottom of the basement and last year. With OUA MVP Erica improvement. Still, even with a pointing varsity tryout. Laurier leyball, soccer and, new last year, everywhere in between. Howard returning to lead the solid rookie class, hope for a play- Athletics offers intramurals rang- dodgeball. Pre-registration starts squad, a three-peat looks promis- off is hope misplaced. ing in skill level from beginner to The Best spot online during O-week. Payments ing. expert in almost every sport. As a and last call for registration are Women's rugby first-year, you have a few options two weeks into the semester. You Women's hockey Men's football Generally, a winless season is when it comes to getting involved. can register as an individual or get en After losing just three games Last year's OUA Championship frowned upon. Without a regular For those living in residence, a group of friends together and to the national title, the route was a welcome surprise in a sea- season win to their credit since there's the option to join an intra- make a team. The leagues run ten have to like their odds on Hawks son marred only by a loss at Laval 2002, the women's rugby squad residence league. RAC, or weeks with finals and prizes at the the ice. With Coach Rick Osborne's in the national semi-finals. The probably heads the list of teams Residence Athletic Council, organ- end. new contract and national expo- Hawks lose only six players this you shouldn't lose sleep about izes sports where you will play for With so many options, there's year and, with quarterback Ryan missing. your house against other resi- no excuse not to grab a friend and Pyear returning for his final year of dences. There is a small $10 fee to get involved. Intramurals are a eligibility, aYates Cup repeat could The Rest play for a semester. Sports include great way to stay fit, fend off stress very well be in the cards, though men's and women's basketball, co- and meet new people. For more McMaster and Western will do The remainder of Laurier's varsity ed inner-tube water polo, co-ed information on intramural theirbest to stop us. squads should compete, though soccer, as well as men's and leagues, visit: none seem to be of championship women's soccer. These leagues are Women's volleyball caliber. Both basketball and soccer a great way to get to know the peo- http://www.laurierathletics.com/intraniurals After reeling off seven consecutive teams, as well as the men's hockey ple in yours and other residences victories, the Hawks fell to Western club, have been reliable bets for in the OUA final. As Laurier con- the playoffs over the past few sea- tinually thirsts for its first Ontario sons; meanwhile, the men's rugby Weekly 101 - Sports crown in school history, the strong and baseball teams seek to get The Cord returning core led by OUA All Star over the hump and enter the The Cord Sports is the most comprehensive source for in-depth, unbi- Danielle Walker leaves Laurier upper echelon of competition that ased reporting on Wilfrid Laurier's varsity athletics. In addition, we offer faithful hopeful. has eluded them of late. insightful opinion-based reporting on professional sports, and other sporting news relevant to the WLU community. Cindy Eadie [email protected] The Cord Weekly Sports FROSH MAILER 2005 23

Sunny days, same old Mo' money, mo' production? average Jays to superstar Okay, J.P., I will give you that one. Should the Philadelphia Eagles bow the demands of showboat Terrell After all, the Jays only trail the Twins by 4.5 games (as of June 28) Owens or is he just another player in the team-centric NFL? in the AL Wild Card race. MARK HOPKINS The tough part forTorontonians MLB Insider is that the loaded New York Yankees and curse-defying Boston Their new a stun- home includes Red Sox are vulnerable this year. JOE TURCOTTE ning turf surface, prominent The Yankees have shifted around Staff Writer advertising Rogers and fluorescent much of their line-up, and green scoreboards that are not Boston's pitching staff is nowhere Maybe it's justme, but I don't think at, only hard to look but also hard near the prowess of their historic that Terrell Owens got the memo - when run into - ask Johnny just run last October. It's too bad for and if he did, then he didn't get the Damon. The team also has a new the Blue Jays that they couldn't message. For a player who has bench boss, John Gibbons, and a take advantage of these teams' always acted as if he adheres to the new few faces on the field, namely sub-par performances thus far 'me-first' philosophy of the NBA, Corey Koskie and Shea with a breakthrough season for this memo might be life changing. Hillenbrand. themselves. Ofcourse, the memo I'm talking Despite all of about isn't real - but maybe it The Orioles are one Rafael this, the future does should be. The memo would appear to be some- explain that the NFL, unlike the Palmeiro Viagra pill away from what bright for the Association, is not a league that Blue jays. Although relies heavily upon its superstars. falling limp and coming back to the Jays look more For better or worse, the NFL is a like the Black Crows 'team first, league second, players earth. in their new uni- last' kind of operation. It's a league forms and their where playoff quarterbacks are cut Contributed Photo main play-by-play man, on a whim (tough luck Quincy Jamie - fans, SCREW THE RULES In his typical egotistical manner, Terrell Unfortunately for Blue Jays Campbell, speaks like a computer- Carter) and former-rushing lead- the Owens stares down the league's top brass and his own team in an squad has settled into their all ized answering machine, there are ers still in their prime can't get too familiar attempt to circumvent player salary rules. position in the middle reasons for fans to be optimistic. signed (sorry Edgerrin James and of AL East. the Toronto managed Rookie infielder Aaron Hill Shaun Alexander). But Terrell has Nonetheless, the Eagles and Agreement (CBA), is a non-guar- to get off to a great start, causing a thrived thus far his first taste of Owens doesn't seem to under- in Owens remain at odds. In spite of anteed contract. Of course, the number of casual fans to jump on the major leagues, as a fill-in for stand this, and by all indications a heroic, but ultimately futile two sides will probably meet in the the Jays' bandwagon. The pitching injured Canadian third baseman never has. Super Bowl performance, which middle somewhere, with Owens was great, Gustavo Chacin was Corey Koskie. Roy Halladay is an Ever since his days in San an saw Owens play against doctor's getting more money upfront and looking like early Rookie of the early favourite for another Cy Francisco, Owens has looked lov- Year candidate and the advice and almost lead the Eagles the Eagles saving face by not offence Young Award and Orlando ingly at the spotlight, even being was as a to their first ever Super Bowl win, shelling out more cash. gelling team to get the job Hudson on to brazen enough to turn the star at may be his way his the two sides are stuck like stub- But a problem still remains: the done. first Gold Glove. the center of Texas However, NFL's CBA doesn't give much to "Gibby's Boys" have Also, Toronto got a steal in the Stadium into his a in the players and is aimed at making taken few steps back the last draft in early when they own stage. And who June The only thing Philly fans love team owners and the league rich month or so, consistently hovering picked up left-handed pitcher can forget T.O.'s .500 beyond comparison in the North around the mark. Yes, the Ricky Romero out infamous auto- of Cal State more than a winner is an arrogant American sports world. When the Blue Jays have a young team. Yes, Fullerton. This was the second graph signings? CBA expires, there might be some are - they certainly better than most straight year that Ricciardi has Then again, winner see Jeremy Roenick and of the recent fireworks, as the players seek guar- Toronto teams in opted for a lefty with his first pick; maybe I'm being memory. But were some people anteed contracts and the league Romero went sixth overall as the too hard on T.O. He Allen Iverson overly in tries to maintain the status quo. optimistic saying that the draft's top pitcher. is, after all, one of a The NFL is the best-run sports- Jays had chance at making the The Jays of today, however, will the league's most dangerous American League playoffs this born children in a staring-contest, league in North America; they likely sputter around the .500 receivers, and helped the Eagles season? Absolutely. with neither side wishing to blink should learn from the NHL's mis- mark for the rest of the season, as get over the Conference first. Things are so bad that Owens takes and compromise to avoid The frustrating part of this sce- the cream always rises to the top Championship hump and into the nario is clear, has brought in the NFL's most labour unrest. But for now we'll quite and it's in a 162-game schedule. Despite Super Bowl. There was even talk of feared agent, Drew Rosenhaus, to have to sit back and watch as the twofold. First, General Manager the tricks that the Orioles have Owens winning MVP until a crip- was handle negotiations. Rosenhaus is 'me-firsts' of the NFL hold out for J.P. Ricciardi constantly harp- pulled thus far, they are one Rafael pling ankle injury derailed those ing in past that the an assassin, and has Owens sitting cash, risking their team's seasons years team Palmeiro Viagra pill away from plans. in out mini-camps leaving the Eagles in the process. And we'll have to would "be competitive '05." falling limp and coming back to Owens is the type of receiver sweating. give props to teams like the Eagles earth. who will work damn hard for a Rosenhaus maintains that who stick to the contracts they The best teams will make the catch, even harder for extra yards Owens is only doing what's best sign (as long as things are in their playoffs come season's end. In the and who always has his eyes on for himself and his family. Maybe favour, of course). So, here's to the AL East, that will likely be the Red the end zone. But problems in San it's because of his tender ankle Eagles: for not giving in, and not Sox or the Yankees. Perhaps the Fran sent Owens looking for a way that # 81 is looking for more guar- setting an ugly precedent that Blue Jays can plow into the play- out, and Philly was all too happy to anteed cash. Meanwhile, the could send the NFL into 'me-first' offs in the next couple of years. pick him up. After all, Owens and Eagles maintain that the barely territory, and for giving my Owner Ted Rogers' increased pay- the Eagles are a match made in one year-old contract is sufficient beloved Cowboys a chance in the roll will certainly not hurt. Until heaven. The only thing Philly fans and aren't looking to negotiate. NFC East - at least until they strike then, enjoy watching the Rogers' love more than a winner is an arro- The team would rather stick with a deal with Owens. on at gant winner (see Jeremy Roenick Jays Rogers Sportsnet The the current deal, which, as per the and Allen Iverson). Rogers Centre. league's Collective Bargaining LAURIERRoy Halladay RECREATION 2005-2006 & 24￿ FROSH MAILER 2005 Arts Entertainment The Cord Weekly

All Photos by Jordan Jocius monthly, which is an evening of Irish dance--they'll teach you how, there's live music, and Guiness! Places to hang in K-W The Pavilion has also hosted such events as a Latin American the six places should be first year festival and other cultural hap- Introducing that you seen at in and where to find them penings. The Boathouse, not too far away, is a great performance BRITTANY LAVERY The Huether The Starlight nal. Ren is one of K-W's only gay venue for touring bands to play in Staff Writer clubs, so homophobes stay away. Kitchener. However, this club feels like a safe, Bond One of Waterloo's historic build- This is a tiny, adorable club locat- The Duke Street Muse Jane ings, the Huether Hotel, has many ed on King Street just beside the positive space, has a very accept- facets. The coffeehouse, Cafe 1842, Bead Bazaar. The owners of Jane ing atmosphere and is a nice bar The Bond cafe shares 5 How can you go wrong with this Jane is named after the year in which Bond were forced to expand into a that anyone is guaranteed to Princess St. with Orange Monkey name? Located, unsurprisingly, on the building was constructed. In new building due to a lack of enjoy, regardless of orientation. Music, a little bundle of joy all in Duke St. in Kitchener (which runs the basement, you'll find part of space for their shows. For this rea- The student-run Conestoga itself. The building is right across just parallel to King St.) this little the pub, where you can purchase son, smaller shows and book read- College radio station, 88.5FM, from the old Princess Cinema, cafe is almost right on the $3.50 draughts of specially crafted ings are held at the JaneBond, and occasionally broadcasts live from corner impossible to miss on this lit- where Duke meets cozy beer. the Starlight serves as a larger per- Ren, and be sure not to miss the Queen (we dig tle street. regality around here, it seems). Head upstairs and you can play formance venue. Halloween party, which features a The Bond is one of The Duke Street Muse serves Jane some billiards, or, on Thursday, Some great shows have taken midnight buffet and lots of beauti- Waterloo's more artsy bars, with delectable vegetarian dishes and a stay in the pub and join in the jam place here with bands such as ful costumes. vegetarian cuisine available at cer- of exotic and plain session with blues musicians. The Hawksley Workman, Gentleman variety just tain times and local art on the teas. Huether also has a great patio, Reg, controller.controller, Sarah Victoria Park Pavilion great-tasting Of particular walls. The Bond occasionally interest is the Orgasm tea, which Jane known as Barley Works. Sonia Slean, The Organ, and The Planet hosts smaller, more intimate and the Boathouse as "liquid After Adlys, who is part owner, says that Smashers. has been described shows (BC band the Unicorns, for Eight." The name, needless to say, the Huether has just celebrated its example), book readings, and has Also located across from the 50th anniversary of ownership by Club Renaissance is apt. live every night. The staff is Charles Street bus terminal in This new location has allowed DJs the Adlys family. So come on out super nice and the laid-back downtown Kitchener, Victoria the cafe expand and the bright- to this richly historic building for Club Renaissance (aka Ren) is to Park is arefreshing green space in it an atmosphere makes the Jane Bond good times and yummy, inexpen- located in downtown Kitchener on ly coloured decorating makes a the middle of the city. great place to hang out. sive beer. Charles conveniently upbeat place to be. Street, The Pavilion is often used for placed across from the bus termi- special events, including a Ceili Audioslave improving Boys Night Out's wild Mike Brown reviews Audioslave's latest effort Out of crowd

Exile and concludes that it has a lot to offer DAVE RICCI demo releases. After pleasing the Staff Writer crowd with an old track, lead singer Connor Lovat-Fraser began attempt the ever-tricky sophomore and aptly placed falsetto on the Even though the summer heat was to plug the band forthcoming offering. Out ofExile benefits from cheerful "Dandelion." And to top it grueling, fans of Burlington based sophomore album, Trainwreck. the band's time together and off, he displays his range with a Boys Night Out packed into The The new CD is a concept album Cornell's influence shines through vocally intriguing arrangement on Reverb for a night of punk rock which promises to be more much stronger than on previous the slow but catchy "Doesn't antics. evolved then the band's previous efforts. However the band will con- Remind Me" before bursting into The concert as a whole was a release. Followed by more chatting tinue to face criticism that they an explosive chorus. 'home coming show' for the with the crowd, Boy's Night Out sound like an amalgam of two old Though more diverse, Out of Canadian band that has achieved proceeded to grace us with a few bands rather than a new one with a Exile does not fully realize the a cult-like following since signing selections from their new CD. The distinct identity. potential sum of its prestigious to the trend-setting record label, crowd seemed to respond favor- Nonetheless, Out of Exile has a parts. It lags a little in the middle Ferret Records. After recording a ably to the new songs which were lot to offer. Tom Morello displays and fizzles out with the sub-par string of hardcore-influenced drastically different in sound and his heavily recognizable, Hendrix- "The Curse." That being said, the demos, Ferret Records immedi- structure in comparison to their influenced guitar chops, most album is definitely worth a listen ately signed the band. Next, BNO older songs. prominently on the blues-influ- and, while Chris Cornell will never recorded their first full length Without a doubt the highlight of enced "# 1 Zero. "BradWilk likewise be the political pundit that Zack de release Make YourselfSick. the when BNO MIKE BROWN gig took place an Much of the album's lyrical con- Sports Editor struts his stuffwith effective drum- la Rocha is, he is still excellent closed the night by playing their beats such as the mellow intro to songwriter and one of modern tent deals with disgruntled men electronic influenced song "Hold When Rage Against the Machine the title track. Tim Commerford's music's premier storytellers. who have grown tired of their On Tightly, Let Go Lightly". and alumni Tim Commerford, Brad bass riff on the smash single "Be Ultimately, the onus falls square- female counterparts feel that The crowd response was so great no choice but to Wilk and Tom Morello hooked up Yourself" paces a technically tight ly on these seasoned rock veterans they have end that numerous members of the As as with ex-Soundgarden frontman track that hints at the new identity to make Rage and Soundgarden their lives. morbid this idea audience stepped onto the stage with the their Chris Cornell for the 2002 debut of which Audioslave tantalizes fans forget who they were and sounds, group juxtaposes with the band and sang in unison. lyrics with Audioslave, there was no doubting their fans. focus on what they've become. murderous pop Once the song came to a close the Out above Chris melodies and infectiously catchy the band's credibility. Blending two of Exile is, all, Despite its shortcomings, Out of band embraced their loyal fans Cornell at his best. His a metal riffs. of the nineties' most successful meander- Exile definitely takes step in that and expressed to the entire Reverb two rock acts, it was merely a question ing, textured vocals shine through direction. Following sub-par opening crowd that they hoped to see them of whether the chemistry would on tracks like "Yesterday to acts, BNO erupted onto the stage all in the near future. work. Tomorrow" and "Heaven's Dead." [email protected] and opened their set with the Boys Night Out's second album, He in a new explosive track "A Torrid Love After a generally successful takes the band direc- Trainwreck, is due out on Ferret throaty Affair" one of their early debut, Audioslave is back to tion with rich, melodies from Recordsluly 27th, 2005. IThe Cord Weekly I & Arts Entertainment FROSH MAILER 2005 25

K-W's musical Comics make a movie comeback platter The latest trend in Hollywood is all about spandex, masks and alter-egos JESSICA PETER Staff Writer When it comes to musical diversity, Kitchener and Smash! Pow! It's the calling card of it - who to out for classic comics' camp. Even campi- Waterloo have all here's look er, and possibly more wonderful than the books, are the movies based on them. We've been seeing more of them as the rights switch

hands - movie-makers seem to be winning. So far this year, none of the movies have followed the classic form. What we have seen are two supernatural, darker movies, and one very dark movie based on a graphic novel. Blade Trinity, the third "good vampire fighting bad vampires" movie seems to show that the series has lost its steam. Constantine, based on the comic book Hellblazer, features Keanu Reeves as a chain-smoking to demon-fighter trying win back Contributed Photo his soul. Sin City's dark streets and darker characters were more rem- Fantastic Four - Freddie Prinze Jr. makes his much anticipated return to feature films in this sure-fire summer blockbuster Contributed Photo iniscent of old film noir or pulp fiction novels than of stereotypical Brantford's own - The Vermicious Knid recently released a split Dark Phoenix. Even are comic books. Its artsy feel was more movies slated for record with The Sourkeys. Summer 2006 also brings Ghost release in 2007. So far, there's even enough for the Cannes Film Rider. It's about a Festival. motorcycle Captain America, but its casting is stuntman who agrees to have a still under speculation. There's NATALIE SIMONS prime example of a band incorpo- Fantastic Four features four demon inhabit his body to wreak also Nick Fury, a secret agent said Cord A&E rating more electronics into their people who gain, well, fantastic vengeance on evil-doers, in order to be the American James Bond; acquired indie pop sound. Expect powers in a mysterious event. to save his true love. seducing villainesses, flying heli- K-W's thriving music scene has an early August release of their They are Mr. Fantastic, The copters and taking a witnessed some great years in newest 8 song EP Diplomats and Invisible Woman, The Human terms of independently birthed Torch and The Thing. Together, They are Mr. Fantastic, The Human special "Infinity Confidants. Formula" to remain underground bands and artists. It If prefer high-charged they fight against a villain called you young., okay, maybe is undoubted that you will receive musical outbursts, inventively Dr. Doom. Can there possibly be Torch and The Thing. Together that part is a little a whirlwind of assorted tastes and fractured any more delicious comic book song structures and different. styles this impending frosh year. hilariously awesome rhythmic camp? There's also another graph- they tight against a villain called Anyway you see Between the CD release parties, guitar variations, prepare to invite ic novel adaptation coming up: V Dr, it, there is some- college radio, and the roaring buzz The Sourkeys to your next dance for Vendetta, which is about free- Doom. Can there possibly be thing in comic of Internet forums, discovering party, just this past May they have dom fighters struggle against any more delicious comic movies for every- that warm, comfortable niche of released a split record with totalitarianism. Oh, also, Natalie book one. There's action, musical familiarity should come Brantford's finest The Vermicious Portman has her head shaved. camp? dark pasts, dark easily. Knid a Next year, the third installation and have 7" release party futures, pointless If you consider the Internet to happening July 9th at Kitchener's of X-Men: X3, comes to theatres. It stars Nicholas Cage, who at dialogue, supernatural strengths, be your preferred musical power- Zero to One. This summer, be sure Most of the main mutants are still first seems like a strange casting bad guys that are really good guys, house of information, websites to be there or be... well, just be involved, and there are rumours choice- they actually had to hide good guys that fight bad guys, such as www.kwmusic.ca, wwwroy- there. that Beast and Gambit will appear his ghost rider tattoo so he could amazing special effects, love alcity.ca,www.stillepost.ca/boards, If you're into the hypnotic as well. The villain is said to be sto- play the role. But once you see him ries, and most of all, lots of fun. www.2ohz.ca,and www.sl9punk.com instrumentations of electronically another new mutant, Juggernaut, in his hair piece, it all comes are some of the more popular influenced rock, com- but he may be supported by the beautifully together. domains where you can find hor- posed melodic hooks and textured rifyingly long lists of bands and sound structure, bands like Sing local show postings for the present That Yell That Spell and Winter month. Equinox may just be your ticket. Stripes' satanic verses slightly off This town does seem to be a You can spot both bands this sum- predominant supporter of the mer in Toronto promoting their ly known as Jack White's home, Over For Me)", which opens with emo/screamo and post-hardcore latest albums. Satan is a step away from the the line "I blew it," perhaps a lyri- craze. This is exciting news if Lastly, if your idea of brilliantly music the public has come to cal signal as to what's ahead on music drenched in teen-angst and structured music involves expect from The White Stripes. Satan. power pop melodies are your unorthodox guitar arrangements, Get Behind Me Satan isn't a bad "Little Ghost" could be seen as proverbial cup of tea. However, for speedy punk tempos and vocals album, it just isn't what it could this album's "Hotel Yorba" as the the rest of you interested in the that consistently shift between be. It essentially sounds like an musical influence that Loretta pretentious off-beats ofother sub- melodic pop-punk and gut- album full of demos and great Lynn has on Jack is obvious in this genres, K-W can offer a wide range wrenching screams, (not only are ideas that never fully develop. mountain music hoe-down. of music from general radio-wor- you in the right town but) the fol- The album opens with "Blue On "Instinct Blues," Jack pulls thy rock to indie rock pop or to the lowing bands might just make the Orchid" a dance number draped out the required crunchy blues newly discovered post-rock exper- cut on your next mix tape: Analogy with the falsetto voice that barely that pops up on every album, imental genre. Wry, Glory Fades, After Her and escapes the concert hall. On the unfortunately this time around it Rest assured there are countless Caulfield. following track "The Nurse" a song all seems forced. buzz-worthy bands awaiting your Undoubtedly, all of these bands filled with marimba, small drum "As Ugly As I Seem" is the best hard earned bucks in each musi- have or will inevitably leave their explosions and haunting lyrics slower song on the album, as it's cal genus. Here are the ones that mark within K-W's ever-flourish- dance all around you. very sweet and imagining Meg have made the most buzz this ing scene, but in the odd case that "My Doorbell" employs cute, sly slapping the bongos is great. "Red summer: none of these artists tickle your lines such as "I'm thinking about Rain" is by far the best track on If you enjoy music that acts as a fancy, be sure to check the web- my doorbell/when you gonna ring Satan, with beautiful slide guitar reaction to mainstream rock, is sites, your local campus radio sta- it?" as the track attempts to be a and howling vocals. melodic but angst-free and puts tion, or newspaper and bulletin SIERRA LEEDHAM playful modern ditty. The album's energetic build-up Cord Intern great emphasis on its jangle-pop postings to find artists more fit to finishing with a toy harmonies and arrangements, piano is impressive, your style. If you're The White Stripes, how The White Stripes recorded Get consider The Silent Film lack and Meg end do you follow up an album as well Soundtrack. This quartet is a the album with a received as effort, Behind Me Satan in their own your previous ballad about being Elephant? lonely and missing Apparently, by recording a house over the course of just two home. "I'm Lonely The Weekly - & piano-driven album in your own Cord 101 Arts Entertainment (But I Ain't That house in two weeks. weeks. I present to you the Arts and Entertainment section. A&E attempts to Lonely Yet)" is a fit- That's what Jack and Meg White inform the masses about everything sonic, visual, titillating and fun. If ting end to an did for their newest album Get you want to read about the latest live bands on campus, look no further. Carrying on with the trend of album that explores the ideals of Behind Me Satan. Recorded in Haven't decided if that blockbuster is worth seeing? We will tell you. each song being different from the truth and character. Third Man Studios, less common- Read on to see if this is your kinda thing... last comes "Forever For Her (Is |ive, |vi, ive qpQ, I monday I £. OPEN JAM for musicians of every level I m I Guesday DYNAMIC DUO a acoustic party I I Ir Wednesday I WISHF DANCE PARTY a midweek recharging session I I JPi1 Ghußsday I , THURSDAY NIGHT LIVE "Sve bonds every week" STAY CLfISST MbIKI mm\

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iT, Idm IJ I|Vi I H b | "Tjl |LH | 1 Freedom Good Lord, UaaBHaAHUiUIHIH cruelty the EIC position Portrait Volunteers j Under the Canadian Charter of and you don't have time devise wanted „„„ - Rights enough to witty models I LooKingLookinn torfor an Fnniiehtnghsh TutorTntnr u5 nBedroom0 r House for rent Freedoms every citizen is entitled to the shouts-out. Props to the Ed. Board for brav- For personal freedom of and their first weekend and portfolio composition. If you Must be a 3rd or 4th year university student Available September Ist Very clean . thought, belief, opinion ing p'duction coming enjoy being front of com- expression, including freedom of the press through with a smokin Frosh in a camera or want to tutor high school student Preferably nletelvrenovated Wa kina d stance to nn issue, Jordan more call Peter @ 496-7007 and other media communication. and Dave for late and to the experience, female Will pay $15+ or fax v3 Please call 575 1973 staying finally ([email protected]) resume to Bob Mon-Friday 342-9202 Therefore, if you believe somebody's morons who threw a'fart bag'in our office at ' I O j -I-Tal actions were inappropriate and in the opin- I:3oam, thanks for keeping us on our toes. ion they tasteless entitled Also, - RESUME BUILDER! join our dynamic call centre team as we were y°u are to to my beloved Brazilian phenoms such an opinion and nobody can steal it good luck tomorrow... Argentina continue to grow'" doesn't Volunteers needed to visit people with Garage Sale Saturday from you. While taking the post-stabbing stand a chance against Rotten Ronnie -BC Alzheimer's Disease through Alzheimer We have you photo displayed on the cover four inebriated — an exciting opportunity for to Get a Sweater Society Volunteer Companion Program. 1-4 jo jn a team supporting one of the top qam- ' neec ' t0 P ay heart's outstanding bills. males believed my actions tasteless, called hours per week. Training/support provided. jn q platforms on the market todavi Items for sale include a cracked-up com- me a fucking paparazzi, became extremely Volunteer and gain experience. Contact Jill pass and a pocket-watch, some plastice confrontational then tried to steal my cam- ' J us' 9 0t a message that said "yeah, hell has frozen over." got a phone call from the [email protected] We are currentlv rerruitinn for- daffodills, cutlery and coffee cups I stole era equipment. The taactfulness of snap- I from all night restaurants, a sense of won- ping photos of a violent incident involving lord saying, "hey boy, get a sweater, right Pull -n me Customer Service now- Drivers Wanted... Representatives c' er on 'y slightly used, a year or two to human bloodshed is a matter of opinion and haunt you in the dark. yes perhaps even tasteless, but it is by no Meals Wheels of What A Prophet on Kitchener-Waterloo is if you are technologically savvy have call means illegal. is illegal is using asking you to consider joining the volunteer centre (phone and email) and/or customer Everything must go! excessive force in an attempt to uphold your force to deliver meals and a smile to seniors service and sales experience then we own mora ' beliefs despite the law. These and people living with physical and mental would love to hear from you vigilantes were so passionate about the challenges once a week or on a spare basis. Pay attention to me inappropriateness of these photos that they TS Meals delivered were are 7 days a week over the Arvato Services Canada Inc is a fast qrow- prepared to fight me directly in front of , " lunch hour and mileage is reimbursed. e m n and women w^o protect •, If you ing company that offers a culture of career I'm standing on this comer, I can't get their !f ? actually J have the time and these laws . want to help someone live development and promotion. Our Call attention facing rushhour faces turned lallllliliillM a better quality of hfe give Meals on Wheels Laws protect our rights and freedoms so _ Centre is located in t downtown Kitchener. around. clutch my stack of paper, press ~ at I everyone can of KW a call 743-1471 and join a winning Our hours of operation are 7am to 2am one to a chest and watch one swoop and that have access to the truth. 1 ' believe eam - Monday to Sunday. the ground. don't know what photographs capture the essential stutter to I I truthI better than should do with my hands when I talk to you. words could ever describe. To apply: Causes dance away from me. contemplate this reason, it is so imperative we docu I ment these using every Online at www.myfuture.bertelsmann.com my next communique. Hey, well maybe you events medium Looking for a church away from home? Fax:sl9-570-9804 should stay possible including photography. ; Email: !? e u IS some one was stabbed last [email protected] 0 Want to recharge your spiritual batteries? The Spectre of Albert Street Sunday morning and hopefully these pho- A help Emmanuel United Church is a vibrant, We offer a competitive compensation pack- tos will expose the seriousness of that W ... lit age, io, ■ multi-generational congregation located in training and a fun working environ- a< ]'u fmrnik i M young j.v , downtown Waterloo, a short walk from WLU ment. Wanted As for the men who tried to steal my / mh

... think should and just seconds from the #7 bus route. camera you consider your- jf m I — Come worship with us! Sunday mornings at Starting at $10.50/hr. A phone call from far away, a 'hi. how are se'' lucky that the police were around to sra 10:00am on Bridgeport Road y°u today?' and a sign recovery comes to P r o':ect your right: "What? You mean this isn't tile Albert, the broken ones. Don t touch the fucking camera. and more to add? BRDN second round?' Emo Boy Jordan Joke-Us B ab cock

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