CHATROOM follow us on @tnt_downunder Pam Ann She’s the straight-talking, foul-mouthed hostie and she’s back with a brand new show. We chat to the woman behind the trolley, Caroline Reid, about how she likes to fl y... INTERVIEW ALEX HARMON

Best fi lm to watch on a fl ight? “: once a I like a good glass of red wine and movie that , always a slut” makes you cry. Especially when a fl ight attendant comes up to you and you’re in tears and they have no understanding why. Some of the domestic fl ights, like on , they just show news clips. probably have the most blinging entertainment program, the thing with Qantas is, you have to wait for one fi lm to fi nish before you watch the next one. Emirates staff would freak out if they got on there and realised they were still using VHS!

What about in-fl ight magazines? I love them. High Life is the BA publication and that’s a good one. I also like the Qantas magazine, Australian Way. I always read them, but I also take trash to read, like Enquire, Heat, Grazia, OK, Hello. And it’s the same shit, just Which is the best to travel? Any tips for fl ying cattle class? regurgitated. I don’t even read it, I just look at Long haul, for me, I’m not fooled I don’t fl y cattle. I haven’t been back down there the pictures and just go “sucked in bitches.” by mood lighting, okay Emirates? Short haul since the Eighties. through Australia – I know I slag them off – but Your thoughts on the mile high club? I would have to say Qantas. They have all these What do you hate about economy I think it’s a myth that people fuck on the plane. museum pieces they like to pull out, I was on a passengers then? I think it’s such an un-sexy place. I mean apart 676 and they had ashtrays in the arm rests. I was That they exist. That they go to the toilet from on Pam Ann Airways where it’s encouraged like, fuck me, you know something is old when it barefoot and step on all of the piss. I hate the and there are double beds and dark rooms. But has an ashtray on it. sound of their voices. And I hate people that on a normal airline – no. You’re never sitting sit down on the fl oor in when they’re next to anyone hot anyway. You always get the What about that engine that fell off the getting a connection. Just stand up and have ugly ginger minger sitting next to you. QF32 plane? some fucking dignity. I know, imagine being the one on the plane that What sets Pam Ann Airways apart? saw that. Everyone is watching a fi lm but you What is the most creative reason you’ve Well we nail the economy passengers to the seat have to be the one to say to the pilot, “I just heard a passenger use for an upgrade? and shut the curtains and turn up the gas. You want to tell you that your engine fucking fell off That they’re dead. Apparently on BA someone complain that you can’t sleep, well there you go. the plane, bitch.” Like hello? I love how they’re did die and they put them in fi rst class – to the trying to be the new “Miracle on the Hudson.” horror of the other people up there. In a body Who gives you the most material? They’re like “oh we are just like them because bag is the only way you’d get an upgrade on my Oh, Qantas the poor things, they just keep we landed safely after our engine fell off.” It’s airline. Unless you looked really fi erce. I’d clear feeding me stuff. If it’s not a guy put on hold for not a competition. I bought the book and it’s so the way for someone who looked really hot. 15 hours, it’s a drunk pilot. thick. I mean, what is there to talk about? You fl ew, the engine fell off, you landed. How come What’s your favourite airline food? What’s next for you? it’s a 500 page novel? Well, it depends, I had a really nice salad on I might get into the sex industry, crank it up a Qantas, I think their food is great, it’s cooked bit. Why not get into some porn, I say? What do you think of Virgin? well, it’s healthy – this is in business of course. Well, I heard Virgin Australia want to try and de- What do you get on Jetstar? A kick in the face. Catch Pam Ann in Perth (August 24 & 25) or sex the crew, which is impossible because I say Some salt and vinegar chips if you’re lucky. visit her online at pamann.com once a slut always a slut. Pringles if you can afford it!

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