EDITORIAL

KIERAN RIDGE'S ARTICLE Contents, 'Sleaze City, USA', which appeared in the last issue of Semper, drew more reaction than any other article this year. This issue contains two pages of letters from readers, as well as my justification for publishing it. 3 STUDENT REVELLERS FACE A WHOLE NEW BALLGAME - The ICC Ball was d great affair, with only the quick mind of the Lord Mayor THIS ISSUE preventing full scale war and massive loss of life. JULIE WHITE looks at Well, it's a bit of a fuck-up due to lack of preparation time, but it is what I the future of Balls. hope will become an annual event for Semper. We figured that, since it will 4 NEWS - Argentine Politicians In Love are destined for big problems. be published two days after the State elections and three days before Swat Vac, students would rather have a less-than-serious Semper that would allow 5 LE CRISIS AT LA BOITE - The theatre seems destined to lose the funding them some light reading for a few minutes before the hard slog to the end ol that has made It what it Is today. CHRISTINE FOGG discovers that this exams. It's not as good as we'd hoped, but wait for next year's versiort. Isn 't as bad as It seems. THE SEMPER AWARDS 6 UNION GNUS - The Union's mouthpiece, DANIELLE BOND, tearfully The final editorial for the year is traditionally a wishy-washy affair in writes her last for this esteemed collection of gossip. which serious topics are given lower priority, the editor thanks all the people who made the year's Semper what it was, and also wishes the incoming 7 NORMAN COMES HOME; and even Anthony Perkins showers behind editors fortitude. closed doors - Norman Bates Is interviewed by DENNIS McDONA LD and GRAHAM IRELAND and their respective mothers. Would you like some Predictable, isn't it. milk and sandwiches? Well, being a boring and predictable person, I'll stick with tradition. So, the envelopes, please. The Annual Semper Awards are as follows: 8 THE FIN AL FRONTIER - A Star Trek crossword in Semper! Beam me up THE HIGHEST ORDER OF THE ROTRING goes to our Layout Artist, Scotty, the Tricorder Indicates the presence of hostages. Star date 22-10-83. IVIatt Mawson, for service above and beyond the call of caffein. THE GOLDEN GOLFBALL AWARD to the Typesetter, Jenni Bird, for 9 YUM CHA EXPOSED - Finally, we explain the meaning of 'Yum Cha'. managing to continue working despite having died three weeks ago. Don't ever accuse Semper of not covering the Issues that really matter. THE ASSOCIATE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RED-EYED MONSTER CLUB 10 SOME PET RECIPES - Tired of eating the same old food? Is your coat to Roberta Blake, for coming in at five minutes notice to take over from losing Its shine? Is your nose still cold? CRAIG HUME offers a guide to Jenni after doctors finally convinced her she was dead, dogs' breakfasts, cats' lunches and budgies' dinners. THE CLAYTONS AWARD to Fleur Kingham and the rest of the Union Executive, for allowing me to make my own mistakes. 11 NORTH TO ALASKA - Who'd want to go to Alaska? MA RIA RAMPA THE PLATINUM PEN goes to our contributors this year, without whose has, and reveals all about Eskimos, glaciers, and the cast of Roger's Rangers. help, 'deadline' would still have the same dictionary meaning. 11 ITCHY FEET AND EMPTY WALLETS - GIL WHITE has Just returned THE SILVER SEX AID AWARD is given to Kieran Ridge for writing the from another global hltch-hlklng tour, and tells all about staying In police most-read article in Semper for 1983, and also the RAIN, SLEET, HAIL and stations throughout die world. SNOW MEDAL for 9et^erating more letters to the editor than anyone else. 12 ^\{i^OVSlHmkQys\z-Semper'svery own quiz show. WInnergetsa A SEMPER APPRAISAL photo of a stereo dishwasher and Tony Barber's home address. So much for the mutual admiration. One of my aims for this editorial, the last I'll write solo, since Harry Dunstall and I will be sharing the task of 13 HAVE Y.H. A. CARD, Wl LL TRAVEL - Lots of students have YHA cards, editorship in 1984, was to give my analysis of failings and achievements this and many, like LENORE TA YLOR, have stayed at the Great Keppel Island year. No doubt this is of more interest to myself than anyone else, but I'll Youth Hostel. persevere anyway. 14 SCHONELL'S NEW DEAL FOR STUDENTS - An F.D. Roosevelt Film There were two main areas where I thought Semper could be improved Festival? Not really. when I took the office after the by-election in April - article topics and layout. 15 ENTRENCHED - Semper exploits Its readers once again with a short story For the latter, the return of Mctt Mawson has made the publication about about wallowing In filth and squalor. KIERAN RlDGE's sequel to 'Sleaze 99 percent of what I think it should look like. My view of the process of Trench, Turkey'. reading a publication of this nature is that it takes very little for someone flipping through it to ignore an article because it is difficult to read, or the 16 THE YEAR THATWAS-.... and the events that made It the l983toend point of the article is unclear. Matt's work has optimised the chance of all I983's. each article being read, while still maintaiwing an interesting structure. In the area of article topics, the complaints about rehashing articles from 18 42nd STREET BLUES; Semper readers react to 'Sleaze City, USA' - other publications is absolutely correct but, as a qualifier, they are articles Everyone's a critic, and the editor, John 'degenerate' Henzell, cops heaps that appeared in the Sydney Morning Herald or the Age, but not the local for printing Kieran Ridge's article In the last edition. Everyone misses the press. The exceptions are articles which originally appeared on page 6 or 7 point except the editor and the author. of the Courier Mail, but were explored in more depth in Semper. 20 SPRA: A BRIEF HISTORY - Is this about the contents of the lockers at Because of the emination of these articles, they have tended to be gener­ SPRA 's changing rooms, the development of the undergarment Industry, ally of one genre and, as such, make Semper's format reasonably restricted. or what? It is only now, with six month's editing experience behind me, that I am coming to ternf^s with many of the more important aspects of editorial 21 THE STUDENTS GUIDE TO SUBVERSIVE GROUPS AND TERRORIST content - w/hich explains why I have yet to produce a Semper I have been ORGANISATIONS AT THE UNIVERSITY OF QUEENSLAND - What fully satisfied with. does S WAPO have that the rest of the Unl doesn 't? NEIL L YONS for one The standard of writing in Semper has, to my mind, improved and de- thing. This article wins the Letraset Overkill award for the longest title proved at the same time. It has improved because the bias evident in many of the year. pre-April Sempers has been generally reduced, although not entirely removed. However, it has deproved due to the inexperience of many of Semper's 22 CARSTAIRS OF JUNGLE H.a - The final episode In the current series writers {a fast-vanishing problem, I'm happy to report), and because we of STEVE ROBSON's gripping epic, with the threat of more In 1984. haven't had enough time to sub-edit articles correctly. The result is some really sloppy phrasings in many of the articles, which becomes apparent when 23 WHAT'S ON - ....what's off, and what's hiding under the bed. A thinly seeing the magazine in printed form, but wasn't so obvious at 4am, or when­ disguised sex tale from K. Ridge? No ~ it's KAREN VENZKE's guide to ever the article was sub-edited. Brisbane cultural offerings. Based on the experience this year, I hope to be able to reach a standard I'm happy with in 1984. Harry and I will strive for this result. REVIEWS- FOOD: The Mt Coot-tha Restaurant, reviewed by JOHN HENZELL The Gumnut Gourmet, reviewed by JO COLLINS Kashmiri Curry King, reviewed by CHRISTINE FOGG Sweet Patootie, reviewed by JOHN DEVEREUX MOVIES: Educating Rita, reviewed by TIM LOW Careful, He Might Hear You, reviewed by ANNIE O'HA RA Psycho II, reviewed by psychotic JOHN HENZELL BOOKS: Valencies, reviewed by RICHARD WHITAKER A Different Drummer, reviewed by GEOFF VERTICA L A Bag of Roosters, reviewed by MA 77' MA WSON Which Way is Up, reviewed by RA YMOYNIHAN Rehearsals for the Apocalypse, reviewed by STEVE STOCKWELL The Australian Ballet; 21 Years, reviewed by HARRY DUNSTALL (!) Threads for a Blind Carpet Weaver, reviewed by JENNY MORTIMER SEMPER is a non-profit political and cultural magazine based at the Favourite Names for Boys and Girls, reviewed byACA THOLIC University of Queensland. MUSIC: Thirteen albums of everything from Junk to Magic, Politics to EDITOR: John Hcnzell; ASSISTANT: Harry Dunstall Pathos, here to there. New York to L.A., and from our reviewers to you. TYPESETTING: Roberta Blake and Matt Mawson LAYOUT: MattNlawson ; 34 ODDS AND ENDS - Two pages with enough to offend everyone from PRINTERS: Warwick Daily News, Warwick Bob Hawke to God. Complied by Semper's Qlh&x resident degenerate, DISTRIBUTION: On campus, by editor. Off campus - Gordon & Gotch JOHN'raincoat'HENZELL ADVERTISING: Phone Graham Higglns, 371.2568' PUBLISHER: Ms. Fleur Kingham, President of the Students Union, U.Q. Contributions are welcomed, but no responsibility is accepted for unsolicited material. ^ c FEA TUBE I Student revellers face a whole new Ballgame

Something very magical occured at midnight for the ICC ball this year. With the wave of the Lord Mayor's wand, plastic cups turned into glass, five police became an army of fifteen, huge squads of ambulances arrived to take three injured people to hospital, and the value of alcohol consumed jumped from an actual $8000 to $20,000. Cinderella and her pumpkin coach had nothing on the ICC Ball. Because of this, together with the attempt by Dentistry students to incinerate most of South­ east Queensland the following night, students aren't the most popular people with venue owners at the moment. JULIE WHITE looks at the future of University Balls.

. . . And so the University Ball season has drawn to a close for another year. As our thoughts turn 'to the less serious pursuits in life, such as passing exams and avoiding falling Jacaranda blooms, it is time to take one last look at the trail of destruction and desecration left in the wake of revelling students. One need look no further than the typical ball-goer's diary to discover the true depth of the sludge on the floor at the Inter-College Council Ball at City Hall, or why Colossus Hail is threatening legal action against the Dentistry students for arson. seem to be the opinion of Mr Mark Linton, of certainly wasn't the night to give, out fashion If one does not have access to such a fact- the Riverside Ballroom at New Farm awards for the most innovative taffeta 'creation'. filled document, then front-page coverage in the He says that under no circumstances are any A spokesperson from Lennons said their Courier Mail and Telegraph, a Sally Loane article more students groups allowed on the premises. venue was still available for balls, but after a defending such functions on a 'Students-will-be- As it is, the owners can cancel a booking within few minutes discussion with another staff students' ground, and a letter to the editor by 24 hours if they find out that the booking party member, told me that she didn't want to pursue ICC President, Jim Henry, outlining 'what really is actually a group of students. the matter. Your guess is as good as mine happened on the night of October 13,1983' will 'This situation is brought about by their own regarding the meaning of all that. prompt the inevitable question of the social stupidity and boisterousness", Mr Linton said. One ball that was held in a Lennons function convenor - 'Where do we go from here?' His tone of voice seemed to give the impression room was the Law Ball in May. Convenors Are there any venues left in Brisbane which that he longed for the days when hearts were consequently paid $1100 for the privilege of are prepared to throw caution to the wind and broken at balls, rather than furniture and glass. damaging plants (which, as everyone knows, accept stutients for what they really are - resp­ More earth-shattering news is that Festival cost a lot to replace), glasses and chairs. In onsible, mature human beings who occasionally, Hall won't be the venue for any Uni balls next addition, a ceramic map of Australia and New very occasionally, go overboard in their enjoy­ year after September's Med Ball. The com­ Zealand hills and valleys was stolen. It was ment of life? plaints, as usual, centred on the state of the worth $350. A random survey of some of Brisbane's past floor, the portions of chairs and toilet doors Wanganui Gardens at Yeronga has sustained and present ballrooms seems to indicate that gay scattered around the building, and the alcohol no major damage from University balls, and is abandon should not be abandoned yet, but that supplies. Not that a lot of the drink was con­ not anti-students. However, it must be remem­ students are probably better off holding their sumed - much of it was used to bathe in, bered that the place only holds a few hundred functions in paddocks and tents. This would accompanied by a large amount of mud. It people, and dinner is always supplied as a means of stemming the flow of alcohol. This may be effective in practice at Wanganui Gardens, but it appears impossible to hold back the tide of rum-and-cokes, cheap wine, and jugs of beer at larger venues. The most surprising revelation was that the City Hall will still allow Uni functions, despite the fuss made over the ICC Ball. According to the Lord Mayor's press secret­ ary, Larry Pettigrew, positive permanent action has been taken against the college students. 'However, other students won't necessarily be tarred by the same brush', he said. Future applications won't be automatically rejected, but will be scrutinised carefully. 'The Harvey administration has no intention of putting a blanket on all future balls', Mr Pettigrew said, 'but at the ICC Ball, in the interests of public property, we had to do some­ thing.' Hence, all is not lost in the ongoing search for suitable venues for university balls. But one gets the impression that the general attitude of ballroom owners is that, if students had really been let loose on Cloudland, then the Dean brothers would not have been required. As it is, unless stringent conditions are met, or plants are sidestepped, or the multitudes take shifts, it looks like uni balls will be held in paddocks from now on. WEWS Elections *a joke'

As most of us have always sus­ that Arts students had dominated the pected, the majority of Queensland elections. University students believe that the As a 21 year old Science student results of last month's Student said, "The only people I know who Union elections will have no effect bother about the elections are bludging on their university life. Arts students." This was one result of a recent survey, Women who voted were generally of 100 students from nine faculties, more responsible in their choice of which found Ihal only 4D pcrccni of candidates, with 72% voting seriously those questioned believed that it made on the basis of policy statements, while any difference who they voted for. only 50% of men did so. Many male Of 18,000 students, only 10 percent students said that they demonstrated bothered to vote, though 36 percent of their belief in the irrelevance of the those interviewed claimed to have clone Student's Union by voting for "joke" so. candidates. Only two faculties, Social Work A 20 year old Arts student said, (75%) and Engineering (60%), had a "I voted for S.W.A.P.O. (Students Who majority of students who voted. Arc Pissed Off), because none of the The lowest response rates came candidates do any good, so someone from Science (17%), Medicine (25%), may as well have fun with our $150." Love Stinks! "It's all a joke," another student com­ and Arts (30%). mented. The low participation by the Arts Of all the problems facing women trigger certain behaviour in the opposite faculty tended to contradict the views TOM BECK and in society today, having to actively sex - in particular, the way men react of many other students who believed COLLEEN REEVES search for willing sexual partners is to you'. not particularly high on the list. All this for just $32.50 for a 30ml container-full. Anyone who has been to Brisbane's Without considering the validity of the mea markets, like Sybil's or Swizzles, 'pointed stick' theory, Aeolus 6S is a generally escapes with the feeling that a companion to an artificial male phero- Argentinian nuked large pointed stick is more useful than mone that has been available in Australia perfume to the women there. Thirty-eight years after the atom for several years. According to all reports, The accident occurred on a relatively Regardless of this, a female phero- that particular fragrance conjures up was split, the first civilian nuclear small scale, with a force of only a few mone has been released onto the Aust­ accident to claim a life has occurred. kilograms of TNT being generated before images of broken urinals and football ralian market. The 'pleasant-smelling change-rooms rather than an air of An Argentine man suffered a lethal the fission reaction came to a halt. musk-like scent has been scientifically proven to enhance and increase the sophistication and sexual attractiveness, dose of radiation similar to what was An article in the Washington Post whether that will make women madly experienced at Hiroshima and Nagasaki on October 2, said because a reactor natural warmth, friendliness and appeal is not designed to sustain a chain reaction, of women world-wide', according to a attracted to men is debateable, but the in 1945. Despite his death just two female variety has been tested and. days after an "uncontrolled energy as in a nuclear bomb, there was believed press release. to be no danger that a large nuclear proven in both the laboratory and in surge" al an atomic research reactor, Called Aeolus 6S, it is derived from 'practical, in-the-street research'. the company controlling tlie plant explosion could have occurred. 'natural androstenol combined with the JACK MORRISON has publicly announced that there was DESLEV ANTHONY pheromones or natural chemicals produc­ no radiation released. ed by the body which subconsciously STOP PRESS OLYMPIC GAMES IO ?-s /L Thanks to our association with JETSET I ^ ^ ^* TOURS, we are happy to announce that we have access to a limited number of organised packages to the XXIII Olympiad in Los Angeles (July 28 to August 12,1984). These extremely rare and 'hot' items will sell almost immediately. So, if you're interested in being a part of the world's most spectacular sporting event, contact CAMPUS TRA VEL.

. 5th, ^ tsunday hitsunday loots and CHEAPEST FARES Cost: ^ TO EUROPE

END OF YEAR STUDENT SPECIALS. WE HAVE THE CHEAPEST FARES TO EUROPE, ASIA AND USA i^EVER BE ABLE TO '

In 1984 the government funding to the La Boite theatre may be cut dramatically. CHRISTINE FOGG finds out the reactions of people involved v^jth the theatre and discovers that not everyone sees the return to amateur status as a problem.

La Boite is facing a crisis; its urged Mr Elliot and Mr Kevin Siddcll, funding is to be slashed, full-time Director of Cultural Activities, to recog­ staff will be retrenched, and its nize this as a crisis situation and re­ consider their decision. children's theatre program will "Once again, the Queensland Govern­ be curtailed. ment has failed to take advantage of Federal funding", Mark Radvan said. Mark Radvan, Associate Director, said "For a mere $52,000 extra La Boite that in 1983 the theatre had received could have kept Its grant and Queens­ a subsidy of $39,000 from the State land could have kept its unique children's Government and a grant of $80,000 theatre". from the Australia Council. For 1984 Administrator Jenny Thompson made La Boite was offered $90,000 for the the point that Arts funding Is very cost children's theatre program provided the effective in that a small subsidy translates State Government matched this amount. to a large number of jobs. The company is dependent on this "There must be professional oppor­ funding to continue the children's theatre tunities here to avert the talent drain activities. down south", she said. Jenny has had The State Government has offered years of experience in companies in no more than $48,000. Consequently Australia and the U.K., and this exper­ the theatre will not receive an Arts tise will be lost to Brisbane if she is Council grant. The Minister for the forced to go to Sydney for work. Arts, Tony Elliott, considers La Boite Cliff Kelsall, the Production Manager, to be an amateur company, but the with extensive experience in New Zealand Brisbane employ professional actors and duced now with a purely amateur cast theatre has employed professional staff and Australian theatre and television, young people like Cathy Jukes and Jock had a "tremendous feeling". since 1975. As well as children's theatre, also anticipate heading south. Brown who are having their first chance four pro-am shows have been presented "There are two drama training instit­ of professional work at La Boite would Sydney designer Brian Nickless com­ this year, using professional and amateur utions in Brisbane graduating 60 people otherwise have had to go south. ments "Professional shows work 10 times actors and production staff. a year" said jenny. "Where do they Mark Radvan said the youth theatre better than pro-am productions. People The La Boite Council and staff have go?" At present only three theatres in program has had an effect on over 20,000 need feedback. Something must be children since 1975. "The young people contributed from everyone or it drags of Brisbane are losing a unique resource" the level down". he said. "Some productions since funding haven't met the standards I would have Jeremy Ridgman, Lecturer in Drama, expected from a professional theatre" at the University of Queensland, com­ mented that it was too early to judge was Jeremy Ridgman's verdict. "While YOUNG MEN the importance of La Boite's schools an amateur theatre. La Boite had an program, but said nobody else in Brisbane interstate reputation which justified it was doing good youth theatre, which to being reviewed regularly by 'Theatre be effective must employ professional Australia'. Very valuable work was actors. " 'Jenny 4 Spike' was excellent," done in amateur days. Productions Moving into the world you he said. were risky and the results varied from Many Brisbane residents remember stunning to unworkable". have three options: the rousing days when La Boite was Under Jennifer Blocksidge's pioneering a strong community theatre with only artistic direction from 1968, La Boite was one or two paid staff specializing in You can use your tertiary education to led away from Agatha Christie to Harold presenting adventurous new Australian Pinter, then considered very daring. Rick get a share of the ''good life". plays. Billinghurst, the first paid Artistic Dir­ ector, continued in this direction and the "La Boite is dying professionally theatre concentrated on Australian drama You can avoid any social responsibility. and I'll be really glad if it loses its fund­ from 1972. ing" commented a spokesperson with years of interest and involvement. "La Jennifer has the last word: "In times Boite is lost and should go back. The of economic stress it is predictable that You can be bruised helping to change our theatre will survive. It has for 50 years. innovators who are difficult to evaluate world through Christian involvement. Losing funding will mean personal will be the first to go. I began the early sacrifice, but as a Repertory Theatre childhood drama project because young is was an exciting, marvelous place to people then weren't getting a fair go. The rolumbans, Catholic priests working to rebuild go and provided an opportunity for La Boite needed a full time professional our world through Guspe) value:* in Asia and Latin enthusiastic people with the drama director to ensure its organic develop­ America Invite you to share their involvement in this bug to participate in creating good ment. Rick Billinghurst acted as a catalyst for an enormously exciting third option. theatre, decide whether to make it their career, and enjoy the social life period. The 70s were a boom time. of the theatre". Conttui: Rev. Leo Donnelly, "Over the last three years the Australia Sc. Colunthiin'<> Mission, Council has confirmed its policy of A long-time theatre goer said the grading companies into arbitrary cate­ Mh. KsHcndon. Vic. 3041. choice of plays before funding was gories, to ensure the little money avail­ Ii'l. ((Ul .1790544. more exciting. "The standards haven't able is properly invested. The profes­ dropped, but they haven't improved sional artistic directors and the Theatre J. > , since 1975" he added. "Membership Council have had to decide whether to The idea of stnim others appeals i numbers have dropped as people don't categorise La Boite or have their funds 10 me and I mvM like more inrormalion feel as welcome to contribute". withdrawn. There is a dilemma regarding about your Hit work organic development. Although the Name:. . Mark Radvan made the point that most interesting work is done by smaller over the last 10 years Brisbane's aud­ companies, The Australia Council has a Addrcsbi. ^ iences' standards have risen. La Boite's policy of only funding fully professional ^-^ workshop classes are an opportunity companies, it will be a pity if the re­ KoslcoUe; Age: for the interested to learn about the sources of professional expertise are no theatre, and professional staff are avail­ longer available. It's not a simple ques­ able as a valuable teaching resource. tion and 1 don't know the answer". Studies: Cliff Kelsall added that the pro-am Year:. shows such as "Faces in the Street" and "Hitchhiker's Guide" being pro­ power, solic mechanics, clay and * the Orientation Director — this person concrete masonry. will be employed by the Union to organise Orientation Week activides. * Humanities - Australian, studies, * the Representatiire on tne Board of literary studies, philosophical studies, Govemmors of International House religious studies, social studies of * the Transport Officer * two reps on the Board of Campus science. Travel * Management - Accountancy and fin­ ' die Union Appointee to Creative Broad­ ance, legal studies, economics, ad­ casters ministrative science, organisational " Univenity Committee reps as follows - Board Of Faculty of Arts - 7 undergrad­ behaviour, marketing. uate repi and 3 postgraduate reps * Sciences - Reproductive and nutr­ Board of Faculty of Architecture - 2 itional biology, marine "biology, undergraduate reps and 1 postgraduate microbiology, food chemistry and rep Board of Studies in Asian Studies - 2 human nutrition, analytical chem­ student reps istry, organometallic chemistry, ana­ Board of Faculty of Eduction - 4 student lytical instrumentaiion, electronics, reps information systems, computer Board of Faculty of Science — 5 under­ graduate reps and 2 postgraduate reps science, pure and applied mathe- Board of Management of Campus Kinder­ malices, statistics. garten - 3 studen t reps Social Sciences - International, econ­ University Library Committee — 3 under- graduate student reps omic and social history, strategic Biological Sciences Groups Council ~ 1 and third world politics, social student rep anthropology including Pacific, Afri­ Health Sciences Group Council - / can and ethnic studies. student rep Requests for application forms and Humanities Group Council - 1 student rep information should be addressed to the Social Sciences Group Council - 1 student Secretary, Graduate Studies and Research rep Comr.ittee, Deaking University, Victoria, 3217. N.B. For all of the above positions It is required that the student representatives are studying within the relevant Faculty GNUS The closing date for completed or Group. This is my last Union News for the year - valid until the 1st June 1984. applications for both scholarships and UNION COMMITTEE CON VENORS I retire as Union Secretary on December Copies of the book are available higher degree places is 31 October. ' convenor of Clubs & Societies Committee from the Union Office until the con­ * convenor of Legislative Committee B, when the new Executive take office. ' convenor of Media Committee Rlc Moore the Secretary-elect will take clusion of Semester. If you are unsure PUBLIC LECTURE * convenor of Social Action Committee over the writing of this column - I'm of the nature of the book, you can peruse The Department of Classics and Ancient * convenor of Theatre Committee sure his words of wisdom will be well it at your leisure, prior to purchase. History will be holding a public lecture * convenor of Welfare Committee UNION COMMITTEE MEMBERS appreciated. on Wednesday-26 October at 8.15 pm. in * Activities Committee — 4 members of Does anyone in fact read Union TEACHING BURSARIES the Abel Smith Lecture Theatre. the Union News? For those of you who do t will The Queensland State Government has The public lecture on "The Aust­ ' Clubs & Societies Committee - 2 made available a limited number of ralian Archaeological Expedition to Tor- members of the Union elected as Liaison preface this last column with a thank you Officers for reading it, and just to say that I have teaching bursaries for 1984 to students one" will be delivered by Professor A. * Education Committee — 5 members of enjoyed being Union Secretary for 1983, at the University of Queensland under­ Cambitoglou, the Director of the Aust­ the Union but must honestly say I'm glad the year taking approved studies in the following ralian Archaeological Institute at Athens. * Hospitals Area Committee - 6 Hospitals courses — All students are encouraged to attend. area students is nearly over. * Legal Aid Committee - 3 members of On to the recent activities of the U Diploma of Education the Union of Q Union,.. Bachelor of Science - third year only UNION CONFERENCE * Legislative Committee - 5 members of Bachelor of Agricultural Science - On the weekend of the 8th and 9th of the Union ENGINEERING EXCLUSION RULES third and fourth years only October the Union held a conference * Media Committee — 5 members of the Bachelor of Arts - third year only for all present, past and future counc­ * National Student Affairs Committee - WE WON I Yes folks the forces of good 3 members of the Union came through, and the better angels Bachelor of Human Movement Studies illors on various aspects of the Union's * Part Time Students Committee - {being us the students) defeated proposals (Education) - third and fourth operations. Amongst the items discussed 4 part-time members of the Union from the Engineering Faculty to intro­ years only. were the Structure, Aims and Realities * Social Action Committee - 6 members The Bursaries involve an allowance of the Union; Student Representation; of the Union duce temporary exclusion, at an inter-, * Theatre Committee — 5 members of the mediary level to the general University of 318 per week for students living at the Financial Future of the Union and Union Exclusion Rules. home and S33 per week for students National Unionism. * Transport Committee — 3 members of The proposed rule changes would living away from home. Yeah, I know The conference was beneficial to the Union it's not much but it's better than nothing. all those who attended. It served two * Welfare Committee - 3 members of the have resulted in the "temporary" ex­ Union clusion of Engineering and Surveying For further information and applic­ purposes, firstly to pass on knowledge * Womens Rights Committee — 9 female students who achieved a Grade Point ation kits write to the Queensland State about the Union to the incoming Council members of the Union Average in their last semester of less than Government, Education Department, and secondly to examine our operations 3.15, and had failed in excess of 55 Room 355, Third Floor, Treasury Build­ and objectives and success at achieving credit points in their course. Notably ing, Queen Street. Telephone 224 7893. these. I know it's an awfully long list - these are much harsher provisions than Applications close 31 December A copy of the speeches presented you should try being the Electoral the general University Exclusion Rules. 1983. at the Conference will be available shortly Officer on the night. Nominations The Academic Board, which met from the Union Office. I imagine that will be accepted prior to the meeting on Monday 17th October, voted 55- POSTGRADUATE RESEARCH an article will appear in the first issue of Union Council and on the night. 36 against the proposed rule change. DEGREES AND SCHOLARSHIPS • of Semper next year on the conference. If you are interested in any of the The student representatives on the Deakin University, Geelong have called At least I hope so Mr Henzell! above positions but are unaware of the Board - David Barbagello, Fleur King­ for applicati ons for the f oil owing awards - responsibilites and duties involved con­ tact me at the Union Office and I will ham, Paul O'Shea, and myself - argued * Australian Government Postgraduate SPECIAL ELECTION MEETING give you a brief rundown. that exclusion was no encouragement Research Awards ($6850 a year) On Wednesday November 2nd at 6.15 , The end of year exams are upon us. for students to pull their socks up and * Deakin University Postgraduate Re­ pm. in the E.G. Whitlam Room, the There are cupboards full of scrap paper overcome motivational, study or personal search Scholarships ($5750 a year) Special Election Meeting of the 73rd available at the Union Office, free of problems. * Arthur Young Research Scholarships Council of the University of Queens­ in EDP Audit ($12,000 a year) land Union will be held. The Special charge. I know I resent having to pay The Board agreed with our argu­ for paper to study with. Feel free to ments and as a result the proposed rule * CSIRO Research Scholarships in Election Meeting, an annual event, Protein Chemistry (S7,000 a year) is responsible for the election of come up to the Union Office and take changes will proceed no further unless as much as you want. the Faculty of Engineering reconsider * the W.D. Binzer Scholarship in Nut­ convenors of various Union Com­ their proposal in light of criticisms of rition and Dietitic Research ($6,900 mittees and meml>ers of those com­ I'm all typed out. Good luck with it that we have voiced, and resubmit it. a year) mittees. The people elected will serve your exams. Thanks for reading this Special thanks to Nigel Pennington * Wyeth and Schcring Research Scholar­ as offices of the Union for 1984. column all year. (Education Vice President) and David ships for research on the biochem­ Any student can nominate for and Regards, Phillips (Education Resource Officer) istry of contraception and sex be elected to these positions. The persons DANIELLE BOND who did all the ground work and prepar­ hormones ($7,000 a year) entitled to vote for these positions Union Secretary ation of arguments in relation to this Deakin Univ.ersity have also invited are those people who have been elected issue. applications for study towards MA, to the 73rd Council - for 1984. Union Secretary MSc and PhD degrees by research in the Here's a list of the positions up P.S. THE ANNUAL GENERAL MEETING ENTERTAINMENT BOOK following fields: for grabs - OF THE UNIVERSITY OF QUEENSLAND * Education - cognitive psychology, UNION WILL BE HELD AT 6.15 P.M. DEC­ As reported in the last edition of Semper, EMBER 8 IN THE E.G. WHITLAM ROOM. the Union in conjuction with South curriculum studies, social and ad­ • the Assistant Secretary THIS MEETING OF THE UNION IS OPEN East Queensland Businesses and Organ­ ministrative studies, classroom pro­ • the Assistant Treasurer TO ALL MEMBERS OF THE UNION WHO isations, is offering for sale "The Enter­ cesses, computer based education, • the Chairperson of Council ALL HAVE VOTING RIGHTS' THE A.G.M. tainment Book". distance education, reading, music • the Deputy Chairperson of Council IS TRADITIONALLY A VERY SHORT MEETING ILAST YEAR IT WAS 3 MIN­ This book, at a cost of $12.50 to education. • the Electoral Officer ~ only the Union Secretary can nominate a person for UTES). SO BE THERE RIGHT ON THE DOT. students, offers discounts at Brisbane * Engineering & Architecture - Arch­ this position THE A.G.M. WILL BE FOLLOWED BY THE restaurants, theatres, sporting venues itecture, automation and artificial • the Environment Officer FIRST ORDINARY MEETING OF THE 73rd and tourist spots. The discounts are intelligence, electronics, microwave • the Legal Aid Director COUNCIL OF THE UNION. in INTERVIEW] NORMAN COMES HOME ... and even Anthony Perkins showers behind locked doors

Aside frotn breaking tiew ground in suspence Now, in the new books about the man, fairly eerie moment of the day when I it's even worse than indifference. They was taking a quick shower and I made movies and creating Hollywood's first "shower put him down as hostile and almost sure the door was locked. That's some­ scene", 'Psycho' made Anthony Perkins into a mean. That's something I just didn't thing people all over the world have done sec. One author, Donald Spoto I think for the past couple of decades. cult hero. DENNIS McDONALD and GRAHAM his name is, never called or asked me to There has been a lot of controversy IRELAND, from the southern student paper contribute to it, so I sort of had the feel­ recently about the shower scene in the ing that he was interested in writing a 'Arena', talked to Perkins about Psycho and his original Psycho - claims that Hitchcock story that was going to be a bit slanted. had nothing to do with this or several new film, Psycho 2. I have certainly gone on record often other sequences in the movie. enough as saying what an agreeable chap Well, I wasn't on the set during the Hitchcock was to work with. shower sequence, so I can't attest to eith­ What was the feeling on the set of Psycho was going to have to read some lines, and How did you get the part in the original er school of thought there. 2, with an upstart Australian director it might have to do with whether one or film? Did many people audition for the After Psycho you did very little in the stepping into the shoes of Alfred Hitch­ another of these actresses would get the role? cock? way of movies and only appeared in some job. So it took me a bit by surprise. But Hitchcock didn't audition actors. He was Someone had to do it. Someone had to European horror films. It wasn't until it was easy to get back into it. In fact, too shy, he didn't want to reject anyone. have the nerve to do it, and I think a the mid seventies that I noticed you back some of it, some of the little things I did He chose his actors from seeing them in great many American directors would in prominence, with the Diana Ross in that reading we used in the finished other -oles, and he had seen mc in a film have been too timid to take up that movie, 'Mahogany'. What happened to film. called 'Fear Strikes Out'. He felt that challenge. Let's face it, when you attempt Anthony Perkins? performance had most of the qualities to sequelise something that is a classic, Did you have any resen/ations about he needed for the role of Norman. you're really asking for it. I admire his taking up the role of Norman Bates I've been working pretty steadily over temerity in doing it. again? Did you have much to say about the the years. You have to when you have a No, not really. He's such a different script for Psycho? wife and two children to support. Some Rarely are sequels popular in the industry character this time. He doesn't have the Hitchcock was very good in that. I would of the television movies I 've made are for these days, so did you have any fears same unknowingness about himself as in Work on something and bring it in and one-time viewing only. about doing a sequel to such a successful the original. The original Norman Bates mention that there were some adjust­ One particular one I remember, you kept movie — especially so many years later? was a benevolent guy with a life hidden ments I thought would help improve the losing your sight. What was that film? Well, firstly let me say sequels are more from himself. He didn't realise he was film, and he would say that if I felt they That was a real life story. No, I 'm only challenging than originals, because every­ acting two personalities. So in a way this Would work to go ahead and use them. joking. That film was called 'How Awful one in the audience is a critic and they second fellow is so much more educated, About Alan'. are sitting there measuring one film it was almost like acting a new character. When you first saw the original Psycho, against the other. But I don't know did it scare you? Yes, I saw it at midnight a couple of Did anyone advise you not to repeat such where you get your information from Yes, it did. There were many sequences . months ago. a famous role, that it would be madness? that sequels are not successful, as so in which Norman Bates features in his That was a good time for it. Perhaps 2am Acting is mad anyway, let's face it. Just second role that I wasn't around for the would have been better. many of them are popular. the fact that you submit yourself to the shooting of. These sequences unnerved Last year I was lucky enough to meet Well, perhaps ethically they are not turndowns, the refusals, the rejections popular... nie as much as they did the general Vincent Price. Have you met him, and that go with the acting game, you might public. In fact, I was in Rome for further Oh, ethically. Ethically they are consid­ as well take a big risk as opposed to a work on this new film, and there was this — Continued on following page — ered second rate, almost easy-going and a little risk. That was one of the convenient way to make another film. reasons that It seemed okay to But when you look at it from a creative do Psycho 2. A better reason point of view, they're harder than original was the strength of the story. It films. wasn't just a thrown-together What were your fears about doing Psycho exploitation piece. I felt it had 2? things to say about human Once I read the script I didn't really have nature, so I didn't think it was any. I was keen to work with this amus­ a tag-along repetition of what we ingly relaxed director, Richard Franklin, had done before. and I felt sure that he would know what Don't you think it might have he was doing once we got started. And been better to let the character he did. die? What did you think about the time span No, I don't think so. We have between the two films? Did you ever brought things forward 22 years, think a sequel would be made? to tell a new story. It was real­ No. Twenty years ago there were very istic to expect that Norman few sequels anyway. But 1 think the would have had a release date generation that's gone by since the first from the asylum. Who else film almost excludes us from the sequel could they get to play this role? stigma, as there are so many people who It wouldn't have been fair lo would not even remember the original. label some other actor as Norm­ To them we have made an original. an Bates, as I've been able to keep going. I'm still here 22 How do you feel about being identified years after doing the first one. I with, or typecast as, Norman Bates? may keep things going with the Even if I were only identified with new one. Psycho, it would be acceptable to me. Too often actors can go through an entire What was it like working with career and a member of the public can the late Alfred Hitchcock on the see him or her walking up the street and original? say and say 'Oh, there's what's-their- Well, contrary to some books name . . .' and it's over. An actor has that have been written about passed by and nothing remains except a the man being a dark and myst­ dim outline of the face. I think once erious and impossible man to people can remember you for one film, it understand, 1 didn't find him can trigger their imagination. It's not to be that way at all. Ever since necessarily as limiting as people might I've felt that it might have been think. that he had read accounts of Was it difficult for you to get back into his supposed disinterest in the the Norman Bates character? working of actors, a dictator No. I found it strangely easy. I was called who told actors what to do in an in to meet a couple of the women they inconsiderate manner, and may­ were considering for the part of Mary, be he just decided to sec if he and I shook hands and was introduced to " could work with mc in a diff­ them, a few of the finalists. And the erent way. His interest in me and director said 'Would you mind if we put my work process was very un­ a couple of scenes on tape?' This was usual, particularly for one who unexpected. I didn't realise I was going had a reputation for being so to have to do that, and at that moment . . . "indifferent" is the word came to the vivid understanding that I they used, I guess. \CINEMA THE FINAL FRONTIER

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15 -,e ACROSS 24. A disease Dr McCoy is no doubt familiar BUI? 18 19 First Lieutenant and Science Officer wilii The Crew encountered many strange 26. The race of 1 across during their 5 year voyage 27. Familiar name for ship's doctor 26 Home country of Navigations Officer, Sulu DOWN V. 8. Radio Frequency Under Klingon Attack 1. U ., (initials proceeding ship's name) c [2^ 2^ 23 (initials) 2. Rank of Kiik in the scries rl 9. Shuttle Craft (initials) 4. Peculiar feature of 1 across (... s) 11. Communications Officer s. Where the crew have their adventures 0 13. Captain's LOR, Star.... 6. Name the Staiship 24 15. 9. The ship often warped into... space To .. a Slarslup Captain or nor to.. The red in the ship s bed? 'Deenrekt 16. Energy Indicator (initials) 10, 13 hect, Kiptinl* 0 17. The crew incurred his Wrath u 18. 12. The crew travelled throu^ the of p5 A space is done before the crcw space •0 beams down to a planet 0 20. 14. James T. Kirk's middle name The ship may encounter this beast on 19. Oh no, not again! I26 27 his way home 21. 21. Di McCoy,.. Transmitting device used between 23. Ranet where 1 across lost his vir^nity O landine^ar^ and ship. 'Beam us up, 25. Solar tays that could interfere with ship's communicatian SOLUTION - Page 31

- From previous page - films of that nature. But 1 confirm that Do you think the new film retains the understand it. Look at 'Flashdance'. All have you ever considered making a film I think they have gone as far as they can suspense of the original? the critics panned it, yet it is a success with him? go. At that stage you start getting your Yes, 1 do. And judging by the audience at the box office. It got stronger turn- Yes, I have met him. His films often scare effects in a different way. reaction so far around the world, they downs than our picture did and it's depend on the supernatural and monsters The prop man came to me with blood do too. beautifully done as well. , and unexplained things. Frankly, I prefer .capsules for the shooting of a scene in Here is what I think. People have had a slightly more human storyline. Psycho 2, and he said 'Look at this. I've Critics were a bit lukewarm to the new enough of sitting in front of the tele­ only used half a bottle of this stuff. Psycho. Do you feel they have much vision all night, every night. They want to Usually in a film of this nature, I'll use influence on the success or failure of a go out and try something on their own, How do you feel about the current spate three or four full bottles'. That was movie. The box office proved them and television kind of serves it to you. of 'open heart', gory horror and violent, rather interesting. I realised then that we wrong in this case. You read the TV guide and you make up films taking everything to the extreme? weren't making just another slash and They didn't give the First one good your mind on what's available. But I Personally I like horror films, and other splatter film. reviews either, because they didn't think with picture-going, audiences don't want to be told what they're going to see, they want to make their own minds • up independently. That is basically why I'm here, I don't think of it as a promotional tour, Joes TEMPER Almost BROKE UP Their HOME but as an awareness tour. You can't actually grab people by the scruff of the neck and throw them into the movie theatre and make them enjoy the movie. You can only tell them as much as you can about the kind of picture it is, the kind of experience they may have when they go to see it, and let them make their own minds up from there. That's basic­ ally it.

Do you think there is the prospect of a Psycho 3, or is this new film pretty com­ plete in itself? 1 thought the story was pretty complete the first time, and we think it's pretty complete now. When you make a small character film, with no special effects, no stunts or locations, there's nothing which you sit around and talk about and say 'You think we could do another film?' You don't really think about Psycho 3.

Is there any role in particular that you'd like to play? No, I don't work that way. I just concen­ trate on the script that comes through the mail, rather than the ones I'm dreaming of playing. What happens after Psycho 2? Have you any films lined up in the near future? Nothing planned. I just want a long holiday for now. FEATURE YUM CHA EXPOSED [ The Deity with a Difterence Just what is Yum Cha? We've been reading it spread over walls like a message from God ever smce the student Union elections last month with­ out any explanation to its meaning. In keeping with Semper's policy of in-depth research into matters vital to stuaents, two members of Yum Cha's earthly appendage (the Piss Off Saturday Exams team) explain the origins and the meanings of Yum Cha.

You may well ask, "What the f... is But the great Y.C. came to the authors Yum Cha?" Good question. Yum of this article in a vision, and instructed Cha can be defined at the physical "s to enlighten the masses through pen and the metaphysical levels of and paper, and especially through the being. At the superficial, physical holy substance, chalk. So Yum Cha has level, it can be faithfully translated exposed itself to the world (if you'll as "You show me yours, and I'll pardon the expression). It has opened its proverbial overcoat to anyone who show you mine". desires the mental, spiritual and physical An eminent author. Dirk von Rommel, enjoyment that can only be attained one of the many disciples "chosen" by through Yum Cha, the great Y.C. himself, has described it as "the combination of martial arts YUM CHA IN HISTORY training with erotic sexual acts", but Yum Cha has had a more profound Yum Cha is more, much more than just effect on the course of history than • a physical exposure of your outer self; it most would instantly realise. represents a spiritual transcendence to a just look at this list of those who were higher state of being (besides being offered the Yum Cha secret to success, bloody good fun). but foolishly declined: Napoleon, Pope John Paul 1, Argent­ ORIGINS ina, Malcolm Eraser, John F. Kennedy, In the beginning there was Yum Cha Dennis Connor, Ed Casey, the cast of and Yum Cha alone. Then the great Y.C. Waterloo Station... created God and God created man and And then there have been those who man created havoc and so here we are entirely understood, even by the most have practiced Yum Cha and have been being forced to listen to every Duran today. The first known exponents of devout followers who constantly struggle richly rewarded: Duran record ever made) by good ol' Yum Cha were Adam and Eve (I mean, if to reveal their true selves to those around Alan Bond, (ohn Bertrandand the Uncle Bob (who is currently thinking of there are only two of you in the whole them. The fact, is, those who are known whole Aust.ll crew, Ronald tSiggs, including Yum Cha in the Constitution, world, what else do you do to bide your to have too much of a grasp are immed­ Lady DI, Bob Hawke, Tony Kynaston, and legally forcing the Governor-General time away?) And, no doubt, there was a iately and automatically excommuni­ Kermit the Frog... lot of it going on in the Ark, but down cated. to Yum Cha at the opening of Parliment). through the years, Yum Cha followers Unfortunately, like any sect, there have, by and large, kept their secret to are those heretics who have totally mis­ HOW DOES ONE BECOME PART OF So now, your ignorance of Yum Cha has been thankfully relieved. I'm sure themselves. Consequently, not a lot interpreted the way of Yum Cha and only THE YUM CHA EXPERIENCE? is known of the dim dark past history of you'll agree with us when we say that this practice the darker, more deviant side: Firstly, one must become intimately Yum Cha, known among devotees as "the IS the most important article ever written. Duran Duran, Molly Meldrum (these familiar with the holy script, "The dim dark past history of Yum Cha". two go hand in hand - literally), (If you don't, then you've got no soul.) Thoughts of Chairman Yum". Then, one So spread the word, so that the whole Therefore, for those of you learned Ronald Reagan, the kids from Fame, must study the holy rites of Sui Min (just folk who, for years have been under the Stefan, Earle Bailey, 4MMM... world will be enriched with the spirit of add water and read), whose famous Yum Cha. May the force be with you! impression that Yum Cha is some kind description of Yum Cha, "It's good of spring roll, we're afraid that you're Many who adhere to Yum Cha in its purest form are revered: enough for me", is often heard at Yum more dim than you sim. That's because Cha parties. (The ancient Romans were you've been fooled by the former cam­ Captain Kirli, the Sulltvans (yes, all particularly adept at holding Yum Cha THE YUM CHA TOP FIFTEEN paign by Yum Cha devotees {spearheaded of them do It), Norman Guns ton. Bill parties). Then one must take the holy 1. SHOW ME SOME DISCIPLINE - by the manufacturers of the spring roll Cosby, John Cleese, Chesty Morgan, oath to adhere to the writings of the of the divine name, who only gave a Doctor Who, 4ZZZ... Sunnyboys great moral philosopher, Mitsubishi 2. FLASHDANCE ... WHAT A YUM small clue to outsiders of the true impli­ Yum Cha is such an esoteric and (founder of the "not so squeezy" prin­ cations of Yum Cha) to protect the sect profound concept that its full physical ciple). CHA - Irene Cara from undesirables. and metaphysical implications are not 3. STAY YUM- |NXS After that, the indocrination proper 4. TWO CABS TO THE YUM CHA- can begin. An initiation ceremony is held Models where the candidates are allowed only 5. KNOCKIN' ON YUM CHA'S a dirty old overcoat and a smile, and sent DOOR - Bob Dylan out. The candidate who returns with the IAN AirOII/DN t CO. Alliance most "friends" is rewarded with admitt­ 6. BREAKFAST AT YUM CHA'S- ' ance to the Holy Order of Yum Cha, Cold Chisel na miTf where they instantly attain higher levels 7. CAN'T STOP THE YUM CHA- Francaise of spiritual awareness, besides being Village People »ACKPACKINC] INTENSIVE FRENCH COURSES given accommodation at the watch- 8. ELECTRIC LASH- Church FOR REFRESHERS house for the night (very good of the 9. HOUSE OF THE RISING YUM- landlords, don't you think?) ^AN9 CAhPiNC Daytime or Evening Animals Commencing November 28 10. STOP DRAGGING MY CHA YUM CHA AND POLITICS AROUND - Stevie Nicks/Tom Petty CClUIPHbNT WEEKLY FRENCH COURSES As for political affiliations, the only 11. CA PLANE YUM CHA- AH Levels - Commencing party Yum Cha followers believe in is Plastic Bertrand November 28 a bloody good rage on any day of the 42 DOUGLAS ST.. • « « week beginning with a "t" (like today, 12. YOU DON'T SEND ME YUM CHA - Streisand/Diamond iVlllTON FRENCH BOOKSHOP tomorrow, the next day ). A certain Mr Bajelkce-Pederson (Lab­ 13. SEND ME A YUM CHA- PHONE 369 0965 Books, records, cassettes, T-shirts, Real Life Dolls, Posters, etc. our Party pronounciation) has already All enquiries - tried to quash the movement, using his 14. A YUM CHA TO YOU. RUDY- top hit-man, blunderous Hinze, who MOTOR CYCLE TOURING EQUIPMENT ALLIANCE FRANCAISE generally quashes everything around him. AND GENERAl ACCESSORIES 15. TOO DRUNK TO YUM CHA- 1st Floor, 191 George Strest, City Thankfully though, Federal intervention Dead Kennedys (subject to Broadcasting Open Mon-Fri, 1 l3m-2pm & 3pm-5pm Federally intervened and the cause was Tribunal approval) Open Saturday from 10am to 12 noon saved from a fate worse than death (or Phone 221 7957 or 38 5320 worse still, being locked in a room and FEATURE Some Pet Recipes..

of a tin of Tucker Box for that that yummy Pal. Heat in a moderate oven Swat Vac usually increases the consumption of boring old bacon and Kraft cheese slices. until all that baked-on gunk falls off the food in most student households by a considerable Not the least advantage of this walls of the oven. substitution is that Quiche Tucker Box marein. Combined with the lack of time to actually may also be eaten by Jewish and Islamic Before I conclude, I feel that I must go shopping and a general lack of money, it makes dinner guests. recommend a preparation called 'Trusty'. Sen/e with a sauce strong enough to This, it is claimed, is a 'balanced food for for a lot of hungry students. To avoici this fate, disguise the taste and horrid aroma of dogs'. Trusty has the virtue of being in­ CRAIG HUME shows how to subsist on the time- the dish. To fully complement the expensive. It also has an aura of mystery. honoured student tradition of cooking with pet obscene flavour. Uncle Mahatma's Mad . The blurb on the packet claims that Cobra Extra Hot Curry Paste should the product contains Real Meat. You food. disorientate your palate. and your dinner guests can enjoy hours of polite conversation conjecturing How my stomach pined for Thurs­ food, neglecting to buy Lenin (our cat - whether this claim applies to beef, mutt­ no relation) his usual half kilo of caviar. SWEET & SOUR SNAPPY TOM day's Courier Mail Dining Out Pour a tin of Snappy Tom into a sauce­ on, kangaroo, Tasmanian possum, or Column, a mouth watering rave on Anyway, the purpose of this masterful local cane toad. prose is not only to bestow the worthy pan and add something sweet (I some of Brisbane's supposedly finer recommend Carramello Bears, but a kilo Such gastronomic enigmas are a fami­ economics that can be maximised by the liar problem for Brisbane restaurant bastions of gastronomic enigmas. purchase of such culinary delights intend­ of Kirk's lemonade will suffice), and something sour like pickled onions. patrons who are never sure when the ed for our dumb, devoted friends, but alleged 'veal' is actually veal, or rat. Some weeks ago, for reasons that are also to provide other anorexic and Bring to boil and serve, having first none of your damn business, I suddenly made sure that you know the after-hours For the unfortunate readers who have poverty-stricken souls with a few recipes just returned from the stout-person's found myself in the bothersome situation so they too may be able to transform phone number of the casualty ward of of having to cook for myself, at least the nearest vet. exercise class to be confronted by these these products into thrilling, impressive brilliant, chin-watering relevations, I have until supplies of Brandivino, curried and nutritious meals that even Margaret 11 lias been suggested that a gallon of sausages and Carramello Bears ran out. just one word of advice: burn your jane Fulton would drool over!! machine oil does wonders to refresh the Fonda disco-cise record for pregnant If I've given the impression that there palate between dry retching, and is very persons, and rush out and buy your was no real food in the house, I should helpful in 'baiting' the neighbours' own trendy BYO. (Eighteen words of point out that there was actually a Tommy', whose lurid procreative habits advice, really, but who's counting?) minute quantity of tinned pet food, WHISKAS AU DIET ALE - for the have resulted in half a dozen half-breed bought in our cat's kittenhood while we weight conscious 'little surprises' being dropped in the Corner a market which promises to were still labouring under the misappre­ Pour a bottle of Casttemaine Diet Ale catcher of your new Victa. be bigger than marrow-bone jelly hension that he would become a statistic into a saucepan. Empty a tin of V\lhiskas (who can forget that classic jingle; '1 on the Council's animal disposal unit into the saucepan and leave to marinate like marrow-bone jelly. Marrow-bone sheets. overnight. Bring to the boil and serve KIT-E-KAT FLAMBE jelly for me.'?), and open your 'WooP Rather than applying for relief from with vegetables of your choice. Empty a can of Kit-E-Kat into a plate, restaurant before some other entrepre­ the Freedom from Hunger organisation, To avoid the perfectly natural douse it with kero, and set alight. In the neur gets the idea. I eventually took my Darth Vader tendency to cry out after each mouthful unhappy event that it survives the For all you enlightened people out moneybox to the supermarket. To my of this dish, I advise that you dull the subsequent blaze and visit by the fire amazement, I discovered that pet foods brigade, consume with caution. there in the real world who wish to know palate with a predinner jug of methylated more about these exciting recipes, I were only a fraction of the price of food spirits before dining. for people. refer you to an article by Ian Warden, DID YOU KNOW! that while a 300 eminent philosopher, entitled 'How to gram packet of Rice Bubbles costs QUICHE TUCKER BOX PAL WELLINGTON Cook Gastronomic Enigmas as well as around a dollar, you can purchase a Prepare just as you would Quiche A true gourmet's delight. De-sausage one Canberra Restaurants do'. packet of Good-0 dog food ('with Lorraine, substituting the exotic contents sausage roll and fill empty crust with 11)11 iron and essential daily vitamins') for only 80 cents! 'Tis irrevocable that Good-0 docs not go 'Snap-Crackle-Pop' when you drown it in milk, but it does make quite disgust­ ing gurgling noises. A tin of salmon for humans can cost you $1.90, whereas a tin of the self-same fish, immaculately prepared for cats, can be obtained for nearly half that price. And when it comes to those naughty 'midnight munchies', something nibbly to gulp with a cold beer, why fork out 80 cents or so when you can get a small packet of 'delicious Whiskettes' decided­ ly cheaper? 'Fish goodness that cats adore and humans alikeli.!'. (There are pictures on the packet to prove these words of wisdom.) I wouldn't say that I really adore Whiskettes, but they give you a hell of a thirst. So, if you are feeding your cat Whiskettes, never, never stand between it and the water dish. It will probably kill you or tear your favourite Gucci underwear. The taste of Whiskettes is unforgettable. If you have ever chewed small pebbles that taste like soiled under­ pants, then you will have some idea of what to expect. And so I took home from the super­ market a parcclful of a variety of pet

QUEENSLAND UNIVERSITY MUSICAL SOCIETY in association with Extended Library GAY CONFERENCE QUEENSLAND THEATRE ORCHESTRA COLLECTIVE present Hours It has b««n proposad to hold tha lOth UNDERGRADUATE LIBRARY National Gay Confaranca for 1984 In 29-10-83 to 19-n-83 Brisbane. HANDEL: DETTrNGEN ANTHEM Monday to Thurtday: 8.30am to llpm A cotlactWa is tMtng organizad to convana Frfday: 8,30am to 5pm end coUact Idaas for tha comifls event. MOZART: TRINITY MASS Saturday and Sunday: 9am to Gpm If you «re Intarestad in participating or C.P.E. BACH: MAGNIFICAT LAW LIBRARY contrilMtIng any ideas please leave your 22.10-83 to 5-11-83 name and a contact address c/o Gay Solid- Friday 28lh, October at 8 p.m. to Thunday: B.SOam to 10pm arity, Clutis & Societies, the Sttident Union Mayne HaN, Unh/ersity of Queensland Friday: 8.30am to 5pm Buildino. Saturday and Sunday: Admlssksn $6/$3 9am to 6pm UNtvenSTY V OKCKSUUn UHUUNS

10 TRAVEL North to Alaska

To most people, the prospect of a you've missed your plane to Tokyo, visit to Alaska is about as enticing your luggage is in Bahrain, and a gypsie as a tour of the Kingaroy Peanut has just spat on your foot, you'll b£ glad that you will have read this article, Silos. and will take the time and pleasure to look around. Our only visions of this last frontier Forget your expectations of an icy hark back to Primary School social wasteland; Alaska is a State of perpet­ studies projects. To our (obviously ually snow-capped mountains and rugged uneducated) minds, Alaska was a waste terrain. It's like the Swiss countryside land; a part of the north pole inhabited and the American Rockies all in one. by illiterate natives who chewed animal skins. Even in tertiary education, Alaska Alaska, like Australia, is a country doesn't tend to pop up in conversations of vast distances, so travel can be quite on the problems of psychological re- expensive unless you go by coach. ductionism in psycho-biographical stt;dies of political leaders. Nor do the media The American influence is evident pick up on the incidence of extra-marilal in many Alaskan cities. This 49th state affairs between Alaskan dignitaries and of the United States is an important their secretaries. military base for the US due to its prox­ So why am 1 writing a travel article imity to Russia. McDonalds inevitably on Hie alluring qualities of a state as graces the citizens of the capital, Juneau, endt-,ing to Australians as Perth is to with its culinary delights. On its first day the New York Yacht Club? of operation, the store sold a world The answer is very simple. Alaska • record number of hamburgers. is well worth visiting and should be at Despite the vast amounts of American least second to an ironing holiday on an capital poured into Alaska, its cities are Israeli kibbutz in the Sinai desert with relatively small and informal. Juneau no pay. even sports a "Red Dog Saloon", sawdust No, seriously, Alaska is just full of and swinging doors and all. surprises, and although it doesn't boast Fairbanks, in Central Alaska, is where to outdo City Hall on a Thursday night, you start to hit the lumberjack set. it certainly has potential. Again, like Australia, Alaska is largely One day when you find yourself uninhabitable with most of its cities stranded at Anchorage airport because cluttered on the southern coast. )uneau clings to the side of a U-shaped mountain formed by a glacier. You cannot enter tliis city by road, only by boat or air. But that is no problem since about one in 20 people have a float plane pilot's licence. I guess what you notice most about Alaskan cities is an amazing tack of Itchy Feet and Empty Ubllets smog. A favourite tour for the many Amer­ icans who visit Alaska is to go by ship ai White was once a young Canadian ant to see, poured tomato sauce over student with itchy feet and not a great them and he said "This is the blood of from Seattle or Vancouver, up the deal of money (a common aspect of the lamb". Then he put the french fries Inside Passage past the historical and many smdents). But, being adventurous back on the plate, poured coffee over rustic Ketchikan and capital Juneau, to and persistent, he travelled anyway, them, and offered me the lot to eat. Glacier Bay, the most famous display developing methods of stretching his At that point I could have decided of glaciers in the world. The passage is dollars fyrther. He learnt how to hitch­ to get another ride. But I went along calm and relaxing so there's no need to hike effectively, how to get free accom­ with these people 'cause I needed that worry if you're prone to sea-sickness. modation, and any number of other ride, they were going to my destination Another must is to take the round, tricks. and I thought that I wouldn't come to trip by coach from the southern coastal Gil has imparted his eight years city of Anchorage to Whittier, then by experience of cheap travel in his book any harm. It was a strange experience, 'Europe on 84c a Day' (soon to be re­ but interesting and funny. cruise ship to Vladez, past the 200 issued as Vie World on 84c a Day'), What's your favourite method of hitch­ feet high Columbia Glacier. a must for impoverished globetrotters. hiking? , The inland coach trip back to Anchor­ The following is an interview he did Yacht hiking! I would swim from yacht age allows you to witness the meand- with Macquarie Uni's student paper, to yacht in the harbour to try and get erings of the Trans-Alaska Pipeline. It Arena. a ride. It works quite well. A lot of runs from Valdea to Prudhoe Bay off the yachts are looking for an extra hand, north coast, and is a sight not to be How long did it take you to develop so the/ are often glad to take you along. missed. your method of travel? Did you start If anyone goes to that extreme to get its unusual likeness to the Loch Ness this way, or were you a typical trav­ a ride, they can't refuse. Monster is due to it bing built partly eller at first? Or you'd drown. above ground, and partly below. The I started off in Australia when I was Exactly. pipeline is a reminder of the oil wealth 16; that's when I discovered hitch­ of Alaska. hiking. As the years went by I just You've been through this country a I'd have to have slept in ditches, picked Tourism is about the fourth largest discovered more and more methods couple of times now. Have you found through garbage cans, stood in soup industry in Alaska. Many of the in-, for getting rides. They've alt tried, anything that distinguishes Australia lines and waiting an hour or two for dustry's employees are American students they work quite well, they're all legit­ from other places. In terms of how you every ride, The fact is this isn't true on holiday from college, so travelling is imate. It makes travelling very inter­ travel or how the people treat you? but after travelling around the world always enjoyable. The people everywhere esting. I have 27 different ways to get Sure. I find people here a little more through 46 different countries 1 found arc very friendly and hospitable, and rides. laid back, lethargic, passive. You know, out there's a lot more to it than 1 ever hotel accommodation is superb. Do you need much courage to be a in North America we are a little more thought possible. To sum up, a trip to Alaska must continual hitchhiker? aggressive, we're enterprising - especially I have 16 different ways of getting include the following; Not necessarily. When you are travelling in the States. Compared to Americans, free accomodation. For example, police * Plenty of time to travel, since there are by yourself you do become somewhat Canadians are looked at as passive. cells are often good accommodation. vast distances, of a different person, 'cause you have But when I compare all Nocth Americans But you only try that in small towns, * Travel by coach (because it is cheaper to survive by relying on your own in­ to Australians, there's a big gap. A lot 'cause they don't have many criminals. than flying) and by ship (for peace and stincts. And people are friendly. has to do with the weather. It's so hot They have extra cells that arc always tranquillity); You must have had some interesting here, people don't feet like working. vacant,' and they'll be glad to have you * A visit to the Glaciers; experiences, hitchhiking so much. I've been told that Australians spend the as a visitor. So you don't have to commit * Stopovers in Juneau, Ketchikan and 1 had one of my strangest rides In Canada. Week planning their weekends and a crime to sleep in cells. I've done that Fairbanks. I was picked up by a religious group in Americans spend their weekends planning in the States, Austria, Germany and also * An absolute must - a round trip from the Rockies, and the driver was preaching their week. South Africa. I did that in Pretoria. Anchorage to Whittier to Valdez and at the top of his voice, hoping that God What about finding places to stay? back again. would drive us safely through the moun­ Whenever I tell people I can travel around There are two ingredients that are * If you have time and money, a visit to tains. When we stopped off at a rest­ the world on 84c a day I never fail to get Important for your success: enthusiasm the cskimo villages of Nome and Kotze- and interest. Also, you've got to be aurant, he ordered some french fries. looks of disbelief, amazement, or amuse­ bue. prepared to do something in return for He made a cross out of them, held them ment, some people think that in order the people who do help you out. up in the air for everyone in the restaur­ for me to survive on that sort of money, MARIA RAMPA 11 VIDEOrS TRIVIA OUIZ

1. Who played Thin Arthur? 9. Who was'ever luvin'? a. Graeme Bond a. Archie Andrews b. Noel Grophy b. The Hulk c. Garry MacDonald c. Ironman d. Rory O'Donohue d. Spider Man 2. Who knocked Norman Gunston 10. Which channel had the Passing unconscious? Competition? a. James Coburn a. 2 b. James Garner b. 7 c. Paul McCartney c. 9 d. a Sumo wrestler d. 0 3. Which noted 70's hippie now has a 11. What show inadvertently featured guest spot on the Mike Walsh Show? 15 seconds of pornography? a. Abbie Hoffman a. AMCC Cup b. Richard Neville b. Pot Blacl< c. Harry Gumboot c. 7 Tennis d. Mr Natural d. World Series Cricket 4. Which TV personality has NOT 12. Who said it's all in the wrist attempted a career in politics? action? a. Barry Jones a. Connors b. Brian Cahlll b. McEnroe c. Woodrow c. Vilas d. Earle Bailey d. a kid on the Battling Tops 5. Who played Batman? commercial 17. Where was'Holiday Island'shot? 21. What advertisement won a 1977 a. James Ooohan 13. W no never hosted' A Current a. Tangalooma Raw Prawn? b. William Shatner Affair'? b. Cairns a. Dynamo detergent c. Burt Ward a. Kate Baiheu c. Woolongong b. Errol Stewart d. Adam West b. Anne Saunders d. Tarawa c. Mrs Marsh, Colgate 6. Who played the Green Hornet's c. Sue Smith 1S. Who was NOT in 'Space 1999'? d. Where-do-ya-get-it? sidekick, Kato? d. Mike Willesee a. Barbara Bain 22, Who was the apple of his old a. James Ho 14. What was the tlrst 'Goodies' show? b. Martin Landau mother's eye? b. Bruce Lee a. Baby Army c. Harry Morgan a. Atto Ford's ferdy bird c. Fat Lee Leong b. Kitten Kong d. Nick Tate b. Louis the fly d. Ng Kwok Tai c. Pirate Post Office 19. What character did Desmond c. Pal Meaty bites 7. Who was Boris Badenoffs sidekick? d. Tower of London Test or play? d. Mr Sheen a. Alexander 15. Who was dragged around a paddock a. Slippery Sam b. Natasha by bikies, then crucified to a tree? b. Flowerpot Ben ANSWERS: c. Rufos a. David Carradine in 'Kung Fu' c. Marty iiizz-ipiiz-mz d. Vladimir b. Giovanni in 'No, 96' d. Panda tmi • 1^)81 • imi • {p)9t • tmi • ipm c. Gabby Hayes in 'Wild One' 8. Bullwinkle kept what at bay through 20. What advertisement boasted the (mi • (PIZl -Pill- (q/Ol • (9)6 • (Q)8 playing 'Melancholy Baby' on comb and d. Woodrow catchcry, i ain't got one yet?* im • 19)9 • (PIS • (^)f • (9)€ • IPIZ • (P)l tissue paper? 16. Who was a detective in 'Homicide' a. Ker-Plunk a. Mr Big noted for his recitations of 'The Man b. Kreepy Kritters From Snowy River'? SCORING: (O-Sl You're either too old or too b. Fearless Leader c. Mousetrap young to watch much TV, or you've got c. Grunge a. Ray Barret d. Vegemite incredible wiilpawer. (6-101 Average, but d. a werewolf b. Gerard Kennedy you've got neurones storing useless info. c. Michael Pate (11-151 Commendable frS-TSj There may d. Leonard Teale still be hope for you 120-22) How did you manage to drag yourself av\>ay from the box Thanlts to'ARENA' long enough to complete this quiz? CHEAP HOLIDAY IDEAS 7 DAYS/6 NIGHTS at the DOMINION HOTEL, NADI FROM FIJI plus RETURN ECONOMY AIRFARE ex-BRISBANE $487.00 GREAT KEPPEL 8 DAYS/7NIGHTS ACCOMMODATION plus ALL ISLAND MEALS ON ISLAND plus RETURN BUS FROM $495.00 ex-BRlSBANE EVERY SUNDAY. (Cheaper with group Keppel of 10 or more) Koacli Tours GET WRECKED FOR LESS! 7 NIGHTS, LOSMEN ACCOMMODATION plus ppp.^ «r,Q nn BALI RETURN ECONOMY AIRFARE ex-SYDNEY '^^^^ 2>My.uu

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12 TRA VEL Have YHA Card, Will nawel

When springtime comes around, a Young Student's mind turns to travel. Unfortunately, the funds also turn to fantasy. LENORE TAYLOR explains a mode of accomodation that is suited to even the most poverty stricken student's budget, Youth Hostels.

Many people see youth hostels vides a convenient way to see Great as strictly-regulated havens for Keppel without becoming permanently healthy, wholesome hikers, or bar­ indebted to TAA. racks accommodation like English The associate hostel or* Magnetic holiday camps. Island is situated at Picnic Bay and the hostel at Mission Beach (between Hostels should not be dismissed so Townsvillc and Cairns), is set in a rain­ forest. lightly. They offer very cheap accomo­ dation (usually around $5 per night), and For those willing to brave the depths are situated in most places you would of North Queensland, there are also want to see. If you are interested in associate hostels at Cairns, Kuranda foreign countries or arc a language and Cape Tribulation, student, there arc always overseas trav­ "Granny's Farm on the Creek" is a ellers in hostels. country hostel at Nimbin. Here, hostel­ Certain ground rules apply in most lers have the chance to milk cows and hostels, but so long as you have an up- participate in other farm activities as to-date membership card, the $5 per well as observe alternate society com­ night fee, and are prepared to do a munes. For those who always get an urge quick chore in the morning to clean to live on a commune when the pressure and tidy the building, you can take starts building up around exam time, advantage of the dormitories for males this could be the chance to see what the and females, community kitchen and lifestyle is like. laundry, and often a television or recre­ Apart from the hostels mentioned ation room. here, there are other associate hostels as' In the hostels owned by the Youth well as many regular youth hostels all Hostels Association, the rule list is over Australia. considerably longer. Alcohol and drugs By getting to know other hostellers, aren't permitted on the premises. To get it is also possible to glean information in after 10 pm you need a late key about guest houses which run along from the warden, and sometimes the hostel lines, but have no affiliation with hostels are closed between 10 am and the official Youth Hostel Association. 5 pm. Some examples of this type of accomo­ However, in associated hostels far dation arc the Young Travellers' Hostel fewer rules apply. These are privately at 15 Roslyn Gardens, Kings Cross; the owned euest houses, affiliated with the Kings Cross Backpacker's Hostel at 162 Ybuth Hostels youth hostel association. Generally, it Victoria Street, Kings Cross; or Noosa is best to eet a hostel Ruidebonk from Hostel at 68 Selene St, Sunshine Beach. the office at 462 Queen St, and ring All that is needed to become a Youth each hostel warden to see which rules Hostel Association member, is to take in America apply. a passport size photograph, identification Anyone planning to travel to Some of the 280 American hostels If you run out of money on the (student card will do), and $22 to 462 America (whether because of the have a special charm because they are Gold Coast, part of the Eldorado motel Queen St. This will entitle you to the 'Sleaze City' article in Semper's housed in buildings originally intended at Surfer's Paradise has been converted use of over 4000 hostels in 60 countries,' for other purposes. These include an ©13 last edition, or for other reasons), into a hostel. It has a pool, an electric and concessions on items ranging from hunting lodge set In a Pennsylvanian pine kitchen and a shop nearby. If you plan camping goods to museum tickets. . will be pleased to know that the forest, an adobe building in the New on running out of money in advance, youth hostel organization is alive Mexico desert, an 1890's Boston hotel you can book on 075 5155. and well in the USA. Those who felt they outgrew youth and a St Louis steamboat docked on the There are also associate hostels at hostels when they outgrew school holiday banks of the Mississippi. Noosa and Hervey Bay. The hostel on camps should take a second look. They Low budget students will probably Hostels are located in most scenic Great Keppel Island is owned by the provide very cheap accomodation with be even more pleased to discover that areas with the greatest concentration fn Youth Hostel Association, and the American hostels cost only $5 per night the north-eastern part of the country. Yeppoon Lion's Club. No curfews applies the minimum of rules, just the deal for the travelling student. or $20 for families, even in places like There are nearly 100 hostels in eight so hostellers usually go to the TAA New Orleans or Miami, where a hotel states between New York and Canada. resort's disco after 11 pm, when the room would cost at least $70 per night. Hostels from Conneticut through New cover charge is lifted. This hostel pro- liljljllilllllljillljlllillllllllllljllllijililjllliillllilllllllllllllllllll Hampshire, Vermont, Maine and into Canada are spaced about one day's ride apart, and form a bicycle 'chain'. In the South, most of the 20 hostels Mountainctaft are situated in Virginia, Georgia and Florida. The Marquette House hostel TRAVEL & STAY in New Orleans is handy to the city and the night life of Bourbon Street. THE TfjL' if ttiiA There are 47 hostels on the Pacific LOW COST WAY QUALITY and SERVICE coast, including many on the Californian beaches, and one set among huge red­ with YHA are more than just words woods in Yosemite National Park. . Today's Designs The size of American hostels range from 200 double rooms, in Washington INTERESTED? ond Moteriols DC, to 'home' hostels in the more remote St Lucia News offers areas of the mid-west. 'Home' hostels Vcsterycar's QuQlity Uni Stationery at cost less than $4 per night, and usually ond Service have only 4 or 5 beds, although they keen and competitive can consist of someone's spare bedroom. More info from: MnNumCTuncns. iMPonrcns « suppuens prices The rules of the Youth Hostel Assoc­ or mi noi/ffjTufle eouiPMmr YHA Old. iation arc the same worldwide, and 462 Queen St, WRITE FOR OUR BUYER'S GUIDE Australian membership is also valid Brisbane. everywhere. And anybody longing to Ph: <07) 221 2022 & DEALERS LIST or your Travel Agent 217 HAWKEN DRIVE experience Sleaze City can take heart, 10/600 StictwoQcJ Rd., SiinrvvDod. Q. 1015. New York docs have a hostel. LENORETAYLOR AUSTRALIA Ph. 379 5549

13 CINEMA Schonell's New Deal for Students

Cinema-going in Brisbane, and in particular at the Schonell, will take a new direction next year. The manager of the Schonell, RON WAKEIM- SHAW, details the changes in this interview.

What has caused the Schonell to rethink for a move over to either Eldorado or its present policy? the Village. It's necessary to go back to 1975 when When will you be introducing the new the Schonell was losing heavily as a live ideas? theatre with occasional movies. The Our first "break" came during 'WOUF' Union that year called for a new manager Week when students really showed their with the freedom to promote the theatre support for daytime screenings providing and bring it to profitability. you had good films, at a cheap price, and The logical step was to screen the continuous sessions. We will be aug­ large backlog of product available, thus menting this policy during the final instituting a policy of First releases Swat-Vac this year by opening the The­ complemented by second runs. At atre on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thurs­ that time, remember, the Schonell day from noon to 10 pm at night, so that was the ONLY cinema to continually a student can take a break at any time screen first-release 'Art' 'films, and all and come and relax for a couple of hours major distributors were happy to supply and only pay $2. us. Does this mean cheaper prices in general Since then distributors have gradually next year? cbta..ied their own outlets for their Yes. The Schonell will now present 2 films, so that these releases were denied policies each year. The first will be an us first. At the same time students have Annual Summer Movie Festival, where shown a preference for 'lighter' enter­ we will screen as many first releases as tainment. possible (this year five), plus a festival What would the present ratio of movie of up to 15 of the year's best films for interest be? those who missed them or want to see I think you could estimate that a third them again. like the International movies, others like In general we will have three types the popular city movies. College students of sessions: a double feature for $7 for in particular like the 'escapist' films. adults and $5 for students; a first- Why have students had to pay more to release at S6.50 and $4; or a double see films at the Schonell than at suburban of a first-release plus second-release at theatres? $8 for adults and S6 for students. Three factors influence prices. First, the Presumably this means the other policy Schonell has a staff who work for union will apply when students return to award wages, whereas most suburban campus in February. theatres are family-owned and family- Yes, from then on we will only have run. first releases in our Summer Festival, Secondly, when you screen first re­ and while students are on campus, they leases, you are bound to compete with will be able to join the Schonell Cinema the prices offered by other first-run Club for $10 a year and see ALL films houses, but we have still managed to for S2, or any two films in one day for keep below city prices. Suburban the­ 33! atres also book and buy a "Double When they join they will be given a Feature" programme from one dist­ "request list", and sheets covering three ributor, whereas 80% of our patrons categories of films, International, Popular when given the choice of only paying and Escapist. We will then adopt as our for one film, prefer to do so. motto: "We Screen The Films You Want Why do you think this is sol To See", I believe our audience is made up of What alterations will there be to session patrons who only have the time to see times etc.? one film, whereas the suburban theatre Basically we will have a Calendar type audience go for a night out, rather than programme wherein each week at a to see one particular film, and if they particular session you will always see have to pay to see both, they sit through the same type of film, i.e. 9.30 Friday both. and Saturday nights, escapist; 5.15 What has caused the Schonell to rethink Fri-Sat, a quality film; 7.30 sessions its policy? will be the popular city films. This year in particular we have found it Most of all, the theatre wilt again very difficult to print even a monthly be open during the day, every Tuesday programme, as when it is time to go to from 11 am to 11 pm, and other days print you are faced with two major if warranted. difficulties, (a) if vou have a first release As it is necessary to book far ahead you have to estimate how popular this we would appreciate readers filling in will be and how long to schedule it the following questionaire so we can (bearing in mind the big influence news­ plan our first Semester Festival now. paper reviews have on the public, more so One entry will be picked out and the than the students); and (b) try and get a winner will receive a Year's Pass to date for a film that may still be showing every movie at the Schonell in 1984. 'last days' in the city and then scheduled

SWAT-VAC 'BLUES' FESTIVAL SCHONELL SURVEY Which types of films do you prefer — TUES NOV 1 FLYING HIGH (12/4/8pm) 'ART/INTERNATIONAL D POPULAR CITY • ESCAPIST • ANIMAL HOUSE (2/6pm) What Session Times do you prefer - WED NOV 2 ROCKY HORROR SHOW (12/4/8pm) 5.15 D 7.30 D 9.30 D FRI U SAT D SUN D TUE D WED D SHOCK TREATMENT (2/6pm) Can you attend one of these sessions on a Tuesday? - THU NOV 3 THE WALL (12/2/4/6/8pm - continuous screenings) 11am 1pm 3pm 5pm YES D NO D If not which other time and day? ; (day) ttime) THE ABOVE 5 F Would you wait to see your movies at the Schonell if admission was $2 for one or $3 for 2? YES D NO D ADMISSION $2 or 2 for $3 What other cinema do you attend regularly? FRt-SAT4-5th KING OF COMEDY-S.IS SATURDAY 12th BLUES BROS-Spm , , (cinuma) (day) BLADE RUNNER • 7.30 KING Oh COMEDY. 7.30 Any other comments BLUE THUNDER • 9.30 BLUES BROTHERS - 9.30 SUN-THURS6.1thh Closed for Ballet SUNDAY 73th BLUES BROTHERS-6.}5 FRIDAY 11th KING OF COMEDY. 7.30 ™^'(Final ^^N screening.WHO FELL Print TO EARTHwithdrawn) - 8.30 BLUES BROTHERS-9.30 Please cut out and leave at Schonell Office or Union Office

14 Thud, thud, the guns in the distance. Distant up and ct^ddled me and told me I was beautiful. Because My turn soon. The officer will say: over the top. drums of war. Punctuating the dead air of this babies are beautiful when they laugh. And all the meat will haul itself up out of the trench mud world. But where is that baby now? I am not that baby. and run clumsily into a shower of death. Light thuds I am not beautiful and I do not laugh. My mother does for desperate footsteps, heavy thuds for fresh-shot The mud is so cold and lifeless, and we live in it. Wc not tickle me and cuddle me and if she did I would men. And all the time the thud, thud of the distant gouge out mud like you would gouge out chunks of flesh feel strange. drums. from a rotten corpse. And then we climb down into this What am I to her now? I am not her baby. Her It is a very musical affair, this civilized thing called great dead body of the mud world and there we live. baby is dead. I am something she is somehow related war. A grand opera of thuds and screams. There is water at the bottom of these trenches, but to, but neither of us can really believe it anymore. There is tension along the line now. The others stagnant water, dead water. Like the blood of a corpse I suppose I was once a little cell and I was so small are also aware it is coming. At the other end of the it just oozes up out of the body, no longer having any­ inside her that no one knew I was there. Not even trench, the officer is looking at his watch, waiting, where else to go. her. But 1 cannot believe that. I know it is supposed listening. The water makes it cold. Maybe we could get warm to be true and it probably is. But I cannot believe To what I do not know, but we all seem to do it. if we were dry, but the water climbs through all our that I am or ever was like those little wrigglers that Wc listen as if some voice was going to explain it all clothes no matter how much wc put on. It gets next swim around in the water at the bottom of our trench. at the last moment, tell us why it must be so. to our skin, rubs itself against us, caresses us as tenderly i cannot believe that they were me. That the baby But there is no such voice. We are all listening as death itself. was me. That the boy was mc. None of them are me. to nothing. That is all that is out there. There is a lot of death here. Everywhere. We throw They arc all dead. Even the person I was yesterday I am cold now and scared. My intestines arc wob­ it at each other out of our trenches and then shovel is dead. bling and I hope I can control myself. Not that anyone each other into the mud and wonder why. I am me and was born when I woke up this morning. else here cares whether I do or not. And how impatient the mud is to swallow us up. Born of the mud's cold womb. I will die when I fall 1 am scared because I know I might die. Today. Even before we are shovelled into it, it smears itself asleep tonight. Such short lives ..e live that seem so In an hour's time. all over us and clings to us like a part of our body long. In one short hour it might all be over. Everything. that has already died. Thud, thud, the distant drums. Slosh, slurp, the The baby, the boy, yesterday's soldier; all these people Slosh, slurp, man walking through the mud. Tall, marching men. Marching, swinging arms, right left will be shovelled Into.the mud and left there forever. gaunt, hollow eyes. That Is how they all look. 1 must right left. Meat marching off to the grinder. That is what we are listening to. Death. That is all look like that too. Dead already. All we trench people Laugh. Laugh at the meat. Marching off to the that is out there. are dead already. grinder as if it had something more important to accom­ Come and hold me and tickle me now, mother. This will all end one day. Maybe it will not. It is plish than its own extinction. March, march, march. Cuddle mc close to you and tell me 1 am beautiful. so hard to believe it will end. We have all been here so Struggling bravely through the mud, so determined to I know I am not and that I am a big, muddy soldier. long now it is all we seem to know. And wc are the get where they are going. But 1 need you know and 1 am so afraid. Wrap your lucky ones. And where are they going? They do not even know. care around me and tell me it will be all right. I know But we are not lucky. We are alive but we are not 1 do. And it will be my turn soon and I do not want it will not, but tell me it will and tell me it will be all really alive. When we go back after this, back home, to go. right. I know it will not, but tell me it will and 1 will it will be too late. Wc are already dead. The world I will not be so determined to slurp through the believe you. Tell me now, mother. has already ceased to exist for us. mud that tells me where I am going with every step Nothing. No voice, no explanation. Just the mud- Somewhere along the line even the ones who are not I take. I am going to swallow you, it says. | am going noises of soldiers wading into position. The clicking dead have been killed. And if we go back home we will to swallow you whole and no one will ever know you of rifles being tested one last time. not really be there. People we know will talk to us were there. And then the mud will swallow my foot Our rifles, the only clean, dry things we own. Take but they will not be talking to anyone. and I will have to pull it back up out of the sucking, you alive. They are our mothers now, our lovers. Maybe Uiey will congratulate us on winning. Or be toothless mouth only to put it down again in another They are all that matter, the only friends we have. ashamed of us for losing. But we have not won or one. The enemy are not our friends. They want to kill tost anything. We are just dead. There is no escape and I know it will get me even­ us. Our officers are not our friends. They will kill us When I was small I was a rolly-polty baby. And my tually. And swallow me. And I will return forever to if we do not obey them. We are not each other's friends. mother tickled me and I laughed. And she picked me the great cold womb from whence I came. I have seen too many men shot in the back over a card game the night before to believe that. We shoot each other and blame it on the other side. No one ever knows. 11 is the perfect crime. Each one of us is alone. No one can trust anyone. Everyone is the potential murderer of everyone else. That is the worst thing about the mud world. No one can trust anyone. Each one of us is alone. ¥.;^ ^ They have just passed the word along the line. I can, hear the nervous buzzing getting closer as the message nears me. The officer will be staring at his watch now. Taut. Waiting for the moment to give the order. Pistol in hand, wondering if he will use it on any of his own men. Not daring to look along the line at the people he might have to kill for not going to the other death he sends them to. Eyes intent on watch as if its face explained it all. The word reaches me. The face that tells me is empty of all things but fear. The other times dead eyes are now alive with it. The lips, the brows, the jaw are all animated by it. I turn and tell the next man and he looks just like the man who told mc. He receives it like the delivery of a still-born child. It is bis, his fate I hand him. But he does not want it, he does not know what to do with it. So he passes it along to the next man. Each of us passes our death along to the next man. Poor man at the end of the line. Better him than me. I want to live. I do not care if it is just until tomorrow, if all 1 have to live for is another miserable day in a filthy trench. It is all I have and I want to keep it. Cling to it. Make love to it. Eat it. The water seeps into my boots. 1 look down. Down into the puddle. Just as 1 do so, the sun comes out for the first time in months and I see my reflection in the water. There. There I am. I do exist. Maybe I can go home and start again and care and love just like before. Maybe I am my mother's son. The sun passes back behind cloud. It is cold. So cold and wet and I am so alone. Mother, why did you leave me all alone? Let me be your rolly-polly baby again. Thud, thud, the distant drums. Slosh, slurp, the others preparing. Jesus, don't let mc die this morning. KIERAN RIDGE

15

\0PINIQN 42nd STREET BLUES Semper readers react to 'Sleaze City;USA'

though we afe warned the article mav offend, On many occasions, John, I have defended QUESTIONABLE John Henzell points out that it 'portays the ROLE EXPECTATIONS you. I was cleariy wrong. All those criticisms mood of the area and its people' - that is NOT of you were correct and I now regret having Dear Editor, what the article has portrayed. Instead, we are To the Editor spoken in your defence. 1 am writing on behalf of the Union subjected to the warped 'mood' of the author. Thank you for publishing the percept­ I invite you, John, to come upstairs to my Executive about the article: "Sleaze ive yet sad article, 'Sleaze City. USA'. office and 1 will set you straight about journal­ Descriptive prase about wanking does not City USA" written by Kieran Ridge, istic propriety. If you need to fill editorial constitute 'travel', whether it be around Times It's good to read an article that honestly which appeared in the last edition of space, come up and find out about the prob­ Square, Kings Cross, or at Uncle Chuck's describes the male ethos in this society - Semper. lems facing part-time students. dinner table. not just the supposed pleasure of sex and The Union Executive is concerned that As an ex-New Yorker, I am not suggesting men's power over women, but also the frustrat­ GORDON CURTIS such an article should appear in a student 42nd Street and Times Square don't have their ion of that role, the anger at role expectations Part Time Students Vice President newspaper. Apart from the fact that it is share of junkies, porn shops, peep shows and that are put on men and the sadness at feeling badly written its subject matter is hi^ly prostitutes. Every major city in the world has emotionally limited in relationships. questionable. such activities. Any 'mood' which is set, dear 1 hope other readers are encouraged to Whilst Mr Henzell disclaims responsibility CONFLICT J.H., is not set by the people of New York confront these issues so frankly expressed by for the offensive nature of the article, he can-. Re your recent article, 'Sleaze City, but in the mind of one sick Australian, Kieran Kieran Ridge. not shirk his editorial responsibility. It is, after USA'. Ridge. PAUL HILLS all, the editor who decides what articles are There should have been more depth to the New York is perhaps the most fascinating printed. More cynical members of the Exec­ article, i.e. how the author felt city in the world! This statement doesn't utive have pointed out that this article was I found it interesting in that I had always manifest itself in the areas Mr Ridge describes, withheld from publication in the pre-election thought of the sex trade (body business?) in but in the unique attractions and people Semper as Mr. Henzell feared it would damage 'SILLY JERK'DECISION terms of straight prostitution, so that reading throughout the Gig Apple. What annoys me is his electoral chances - rightly soi Had it about the peep shov« revealed an entirely new that the readers and potential travellers are now Dear Mr Henzell, been published prior to the election the result aspect of the lengths that women are forced to repulsed by New York as presented through I am writing to you in response to may very well have been different. in order to sureive. this pen/ert's clammy fist your recent edition of Semper; in parti­ Whilst the Union Executive has no editorial The men who were spending money in these cular an article entitled 'Sleaze City.,.' places were solitary, alienated from emotionally control except over its own articles, the Union My apology I feel is necessary because the Let me say firstly that I know you publish­ satisfying human contact, and the author funds the newspaper and has policies against young Mr Ridge was sent to the States by ed that story quite deliberately as an attention- seemed to be feeling some conflict in availing racism and sexism, both of which are liberally Campus Travel on our annual work-exchange getting device. You knew exactly what you himself fully ot the sewices offered. The represented in this article, 3$ is a very low program. Had we known of his problem we were doing and who you would antagonise - I women were judged by him in superficial tenns, stantlard of pornographic material. would have sent him to Sydney wi^ a pair of know this, John, because I know you are a silly ie, pert tits, sensual face, hair falling in dark The Executive certainly isn't interested rubber gloves and replaced him on the program tittle adolescent jerk. ringlets etc. in whether Mr Ridge 'came' or not - I wonder with one of the other forty applicants who You knew, for instance, that you would The only description of the women's if other students are. missed out. In the future we will have to antagonise just about all the female members feelings that came through was that of the Regards screen applicants, eh John? of tJie Union, the feminist groups, and many black woman in the peep-show who was 'ob­ FLEUR KINGHAM Finally, if this is so-called 'balanced journ­ male members of the Union. viously drugged out of har mind.' Union President alism', I must assume the author of this tripe John, if you had taken your hands off The overall impression that I formed was has some influence over the editor. If you feel a your penis long enough you would realise the that the author was thrown into a state of need to publish such crap, please don't do so in disservice you have done to this Union through conflict by the situation. On one hand he was WARPED the name of travel or New York City. Find its publication in the Union newspaper. Semper being confronted by an incredible array ot some appropriate toilet wall. May t suggest Having lived in New York for six years is not your newspaper, John - you are only a available sexual variety, but at the same time he your own. and being presently involved with travel custodian for a limited time. You are not seemed unable to really throw himself into the at this University, 1 must express my dis­ CRAIG WATSON entitled to indulge your whims and fantasies spirit of things. gust and outrage, yet at the same time Campus Travel at students' expense. Nor are you entitled to ELAINE KANE apologise to all who read the depraved P.S, Campus Travel was reprimanded for provoke people by publishing this trashy non­ self-indulgence in the article 'Sleaze City, displaying a 2" x 2" image of the bare back sense. USA'. of a sunbaking woman on a 2' x 3'Whitsunday You have a responsibility to maintain a Fintly, I am outraged that the article poster. What is being done to prevent future high standard of journalism with articles and HONESTY * appeared under the heading 'Travel'. Even articles like this appearing? stories that present this Union and its members in as good a light as possible. You are probably To the Editor too wet behind the ears (and elsewhere) to I question whether it is necessary and realise that politicians, interstate campuses and appropriate for Semper to print an article members of the general public v\nll have the describing the author's accepting and misfortune to read that profoundly stupid benefitting from a system which grossly article. dehumanises and exploits women. 'Sleaze City, USA', however, is well-written 1 ask you, John, just what sort of impression do you want to create in the minds of other and Kieran Ridge's wanking and voyeurism is people about this Union? Is a student news­ essential for this article to work successfully. paper really the place for a pathetic attempt The explicit honesty contributes a powerful at purile pornography? Should students' money immediacy and vividness. be wasted on stories about what Kieran Ridge The fact that Kieran mentions very little finds sexually stimulating? Is there something about his feelings during these activities con­ wrong with Mr Ridge? Do we really need public veys much about the physical focus of male declarations of his strange sexual problems - sexuality. Thoughtful reading of his article for instance, his apparent need to indulge in could teach us something about the chasm public masturbation? How is this article in the which separates the sexes' different percept­ best interests of students? ions of sexuality (and inspire discussion leading I would point out that I am not opposed to greater understanding). to pornography - provided that all the parties CHRISTINE FOGG are consenting of their own free will without the unwilling exploitation of any party involv­ ed. Having said that, I would address you, John, DEPRA VITY as well as Kieran Ridge, to a number of prop­ Mr K Ridge, ositions - Did you have another wank upon 1. New York City and the US in general have seeing your "masterpiece" In print. It is very poor social security systems, particu-' bad enough that this sort of thing goes on larly for the ethnic unemployed. and that you get your kicks by joining in, 2. New York City has a high level of drug but do you have to advertise your deprav­ addiction - and habits are expensive. ity to the rest of the campus? 3. Many of the performers in the porno If this was supposed to be a "light- article are of ethnic origin. hearted" account, we are afraid you came 4. Many articles and television stories seen in across as sick rather than funny. this city about the pornography industry in Reference: the stereotypical dirty old man New York City suggest that that industry in the raincoat and the pleasure to your ego. (and prostitution) can be directly linked to One wonders if you participate in the Aust­ unemployment and poverty. Often the ralian art of poofter-bashing or are the recipient people involved are so desperate that this of such action. It appears you found that the is the only source of income for them. I homosexual urge is perhaps not so alien as most hope Kieran Ridge enjoyed his masturbat- people would hope. tion fantasy and I hope he or any of his It is a wonder that after being a witness to friends and relatives are never in the sit­ tdl this human degradation you could make uation of having to rely on such an income. your way home and sit down to dinner. OPINION I

Neither does Mr Henzell escape criticism - it may be tme, Henzell, that making Semper REVULSION either left or right wing would not be represent­ To the Editor, ative of the students, but I can assure you that It would be impossible for me to desc­ this type of trash certainly is not what the ribe the revulsion and anger I felt after majority want to read. Why do you not get reading the article "Sleaze City. USA". down to some decent journalism, rather than It is filled with abusive and exploitative specializing in sensationalised crapl images of women and children. M. rVIORGAN and S. DELANEY Were the article aimed as an analysis of ps. We are terribly sorry Mr Ridge that you why such exploitation occurs it may have had did not come - better luck next time. merit, but instead it becomes part of the porn­ ography scene itself. If this article is included under your umbr­ WORTHLESS ella of "balanced journalism" then what is to stop you printing other degrading e.g. racist To Semper Readers - material. Obviously nothing. Since the editor of this paper feels at ALAN LEE liberty to print comments about the workers in this office, let me just say that I for one, as the unfortunate person who had the forgettable task of type­ setting yet another worthless and blatently RE-ELECTION DOUBTS sexist article by Kieran Ridge, felt com­ Does the re-election of this year's Semper pletely revolted by this task. editor for 1984 mean that we will be sub­ Let us forget about the actual quality jected to such perverse garbage as that of Mr Ridge's work. Let's face it, most con­ spewing forth on pages 13 and 14 of tributors to Semper whip up their pieces Semper, Oct 11? after the dBadline; and I have generally been Does Kieran Ridge think that the world shocked at the carelessness in grammar, spelling is waiting, impatiently, to hear all of his puerile and punctuation. and offensive fantasies? All these shortcomings take a great toll It appeaR obvious that this is indeed the on the typesetter and the layout artist, who sad state that Semper now finds itself in. As have to work long hours under considerable such, the Womens Ri^ts Committee of the pressure to reach the deadline. Jenni Bird Student Union wishes to take Issue with the is on sick leave for tenosynovitis, and in the Editor regarding the inclusion of 'Sleaze City, last two weeks I have also felt the symptoms USA'. This orticle being obnoxiously racist, of this incurable disease. sexist and homophobic in its treatment of those To get back to my original point in this subjects regarded as somehow inferior to the letter: it seems to me that Kieran Ridge is author's white, male values. using this paper as a vehicle for his own psycho­ This sort of article can be found in almost logical frustrations and hang-ups. any fantasy comic, smut rag or toilet wall and Why this bullshit should be inflicted on surely does not warrant inclusion in what is Semper readers, without apology, is beyond supposedly a 'non-profit political and cultural me. magazine'. ROBERTA BLAKE We hope that future editions do not stoop to such depths, and that the Editors think seriously about perpetuating such oppressive UNCLEAR and bigoted attitudes and practices in the future. It was unclear to me from reading "Sleaze THE WOMENS RIGHTS COMMITTEE City, USA", whether the article was in­ tended to be investigative journalism, true confessions, or just plain porno­ graphy. If the former, it's revealing that Kieran Ridge went beyond the normal requirements of of it. It's something I want to overcome. But I pretty one, it was representative of the area. journalism to become a willing and active THE AUTHOR don't feel it will be overcome by hiding it away Kieran's article was, to me, much the same. participant in the sordid, oppressive scenes he in the subconscious from where it may contin­ New York's 42nd Street isn't especially described. REPLIES ue to dictate my behaviour unknown to me. I pleasant and the article is a reflection of that If it was confessional, why is there no sign Dear critics, believe that unless alt these undesirable aspects It gave an insight into how the people on of remorse (and should Semper be used as a With respect, I beg to differ with your of oneself are brought to the surface, nothing that street think, of how they react to the confessional box)? And if it was meant as various evaluations of my article 'Sleaze can be done to rid oneself of them. So I pres­ female degradation and the sex without senti­ pornography the Union newspaper is obviously City, USA'. ented a picture of myself, my feelings, ment. The article is a valid one to appear in an inappropriate outlet for it. However, before I address myself to those thoughts, which I'll grant was far from flatter­ the pages of Semper because of that M. MAWSON points you have made, I would like to make ing lo me. Good. On this account I don't merit One problem with publishing such material, clear that when originally submitted to Semper, flattery. since 99.9 percent of pornography tends to be this article was entitled simply '42nd Street'. Nor do many others. Almost every major badly written rubbish, is that people tend to PERVERSION It's eventually being called 'Sleaze City...' city in the world has its own vwll-patronised think that all porn is worthless and cannot be was not in tine with my intentions - but '42nd Street', and in those few that don't, used meritoriously. Mir Henzell, enough of that. (This information may seem similai activities go on behind closed doors Hence most are overcritical and, because of Could you please explain why the unimportant to some, but I feel the choice of (e.g. Brisbane). What is 'wrong' with me is also an upbringing where sex usually isn't discussed article "New York - Sleaze City" written title is important in indicating the author's what is 'wrong' with a great deal more of in a natural way, oversensitive. by Kieran Ridge, was published in the last intention in what is to follow, and in any case humankind - and until we stop pretending I found the article personally offensive issue of Semper? I wanted to get this off my chest). this is not the case, covering it up and not when I first read it, but 42nd street exists and If you are an editor promoting sexual Now to the heart of the matter. First of all, discussing it, this will continue to be so. we shouldn't ignore it with the hope that it pen/ersion could you please make it evident I wish to express regret that readers of Semper What I was attempting to do with my art­ goes away. It would be easy to print only in your next election policy statement, should have taken my article to be something icle was to break down some of the barriers - articles that allowed an unchallenging read, GABRIE LLE SMITH quite different from what was intended. to say, 'Look, I'm this way and I admit il, let but i have more confidence in the intelligence of Semper's readers. If there is any group in My'article was not a fantasy, it was an others in a similar position admit it too. Maybe after such a "true confession" we can begin to society that should be free ol censorship, then SEMPER DOESNJLEAD account of a reality. University students should be it I am not racist. I made frequent use of the do something to change what is regrettable Good on you D, Connor, whoever you adjective 'black' in describing the residents of about the way we are'. One hope for the article is that people arel Your comment about the inanity 42nd Street because so very many of them are. Why not write all this in my article in an won't just dismiss it out of hand as worth­ of the Australia Cup celebration was As it happens I don't believe this to be an attempt to stave off some of the indignation less, pornographic filth. Several people who the best thing I've read in Semper all account of any 'inherent negro depravity' - it aroused? Because I wanted to present readers hated it wrf\en they first read it, found their with an account of a certain reality with no year! rather I feel it to be the result of the heart- opinions improved markedly on subsequent distractions to cloud the totality of their It's the publication of articles like "Sleaze lessness/thoughtlessness of a society wherein readings. The best side-effect of the contro-. reaction to that reality. Perhaps this is to use City U.S.A." which shows the utter triviality 'capitalism is often practised in an extreme versy caused is the arguments about tha article's the method of 'shock*. But then again, what is of Semper journalism. As D. Connor put it, 'dog-eat-dog' form, and wherein many of its worthiness of being in Semper. Regardless the reality I was dealing with if not shacking. "There are 700,000 unemployed in Australia members, usually minorities, are consequently of the outcome of these arguments, anything today ... I bet they were all watching the reduced to the sad sort of lifestyle described KIERAN RIDGE that causes people to evaluate the validity yacht race. Yeah, I bet" in my article. of their own values can't be detrimental The Editor claims he published this letter As for the charge of being sexist, I see the I was well aware before printing 'Sleaze "to show OUT readers the st>rt of thing editors problem I was getting at in my article as being THE EDITOR City, U.S.A.' Ihat it would cause a big reaction, of student newspapers have to put up with." something broader than simply men treating but in light of what I've just written, if you It's a pity the Editor doesn't look at the people women as objects for their own gratificalion. REPLIES asked me if I'd still have printed it, I'd say Probably the best travel articles show 0. Connor mentions - the aborigines, the The problem I was concerned with was that of 'yes' without hesitation. how the inhabitants of the area in quest­ unemployed, and the people and politicians people treating people as objects. I believe JOHN HENZELL ion think. who'll do nothing to help them. this failure to give human regard to others is P.S. Why do you think we put a warning at the start of the article? It wasn't just to prove Why doesn't Semper lead the way for one of humankind's greatest problems - and t Tim Low's comments about Cyril's life in to everyone that I knew how to type. students to step out of their image of being see myself as being no exception in this regard. Bulgaria in the last Semper are a good example niiddleH:lass spoilt kids? I treat others as objects, but I'm not proud of this. Although the picture portrayed wasn't a iiiiiiiiiiJiiiiiiiiijiiiiiiiiniiiiHitiiiiiiniiiiiiiiiiiitJiitiitiiiiiiii MONICA LONG 19 ^spowr SPRi^ a Brief History

The Queensland University Sports given to women were to seven hockey Union was the first undergraduate players in 1919. association fortned after the estab-- In July 1913, the Union was first lishment of the new University in represented at an intervarstty competition 1911. by a four man tennis team and three athletes, at Sydney University. Hockey was the major women's The first ChanctiWor, S\r WtWhm sport, although the early university McGregor, became the Sports LJnion's women also played tennis and partic­ first patron, and its six vice-presidents ipated in swimming and athleticscarnivals. included staff members Dr Bert Steele On picnic days they acted as coxswains (Chemistry), Professors John Mitchic in novelty boat races. They did not (Classics) and Harry Priestly (Mathe­ form their own sports union until 1923 matics). Today most of us know them however. Even then they were not only for the campus buildings named recognised by the Australian Universities after them, but Professor Mitchie was Sports Association. To overcome this an outstanding Cambridge shotputter they normally affiliated with the Men's and Professor Priestly an English hockey Sports Union (the University of Queens­ goalkeeper. land Sports Union) in 1926, but had The University's original site was in no representation on it and could not George Street near the Botanical Gardens, elect delegates to AUSA. but the early sports facilities left a little to be desired. The Brisbane Courier in By the 1930s, when it was decided to July 1911 blamed the lack of good move the University to St Lucia, the facilities for the students' rather ordinary Men had eight clubs (athletics, boating, performances in B grade tennis and rugby. boxing, cricket, hockey, rugby, tennis The dressing sheds were an old hcssian- and swimming), the Women three (hoc­ covered pigeon loft to which showers key, tennis and swimming). The Head were added in 1912. of the University's French Department, Qtd Uni Women's B Grade Hockey Team -1937 When the Sports Union was mooted Professor James Mahoney then began in April 1911, it was decided that foot­ earnestly developing plans for new period. They had learned from the war clubs like rowing, judo, golf and athletics, ball and tennis would be started immed­ sports facilities at St Lucia. A keen that they could do men's work when they with their Union. iately with rowing and cricket to follow athlete and cricketer, he drew largely had to, and this new confidence lead to In the early 1960's, new clubs such as as soon as possible. Sports Union colours, on his experiences at Oxford. a change of attitude towards traditional squash, sailing, waterskiing and under­ it was agreed, would be maroon and blue. Mahoney's ideas were gradually trans­ female roles. water, joined the Sports Union and it A constitution was drawn up In 1912 lated into playing fields, but their Sport was just one area that was was clear that its outlook was undergoing and the first blues awarded in the follow­ development was interrupted by the affected as they began to establish their a philosophical change. From the trad­ ing year to two athletes, two footballers, second World War. Most University own clubs. This situation was paralleled itional competitive sports like cricket, a cricketer and a tennis player. Seven sport was suspended for several years, in the University, and for the next decade rugby, tennis, athletics and swimming, half blues were also awarded to members but picked up after 1945. Women's women took a more active and advent­ the Union was beginning to include of the Rowing Club. The first blues sport in general now experienced a boom urous stance in affiliating new sports more recreation or "play" sports. In the 1970s, indoor gymnasium facilities were finally realised. In Sept­ ember 1972, the Governor, Sir Colin Han­ nah, opened tlie Indoor Sports Pavilion and the Olympic Pool, later named after one of the University's most outstanding swimmers, David Thiele. (Thiele won the men's 100 metres backstroke gold Women and Sport medal at the Melbourne and Rome Olympic Games.) The long-discussed amalgamation of Australians love sport. Some love Of the twelve Olympic gold medals unlimited. There Is an endless variety the men's and women's unions came In playing it; many more love watch- our country has won since World War of enjoyable ways to get and stay fit. 1973. From January 1 1974, the new , ing it. It has always had a strangle­ Two, women have won nine! Fewer SPRA offers you many through its body was to be known as the University clubs and recreation classes. Whether 'of Queensland Sports and Physical hold on our national consciousness, people are aware of the world champion­ it's competition, skill development or a Recreation Association. and, as the America's Cup showed ship success of our netball, Softball and. women's hockey teams in the past two good workout you want, you'll find it recently, its grip is still as tight decades. there. The possibilities include: Ath­ Early in December 1976, the court as ever. It is also considered by letics, badminton, basketball, fencing, battle for a University Recreation Club many to be the last bastion of But the successes of these women golf, hockey, canoeing, judo, karate, with a registered club licence began. male supremacy. say little for the rest of us. Certainly kung-fu, gymnastics, sailing, orienteering, It was the longest and perhaps the most women's sport has come a long way, volleyball, waterskiing, snow skiing, rock- arduous case in the history of the licens­ climbing, rifle shooting underwater, water In the sixties and early seventies, but taking a peek at the sports section ing court in Queensland. Finally, in polo, Softball, tae kwon do, squash, Australian social historians took to of just about any issue of any Australian November 1977, the club was declared netball, tennis surfriding, body building, putting their fellow man and their Anti­ daily newspaper, or watching any week­ open for trading. end television sports programme, should yoga, self defence, dance, fitness, tai chl. podean ancestry under a microscope The late 1970s and early 1980s have and trying to explain what they saw. be enough to shake us back to reality. Another area in which SPRA offers As far as media coverage, funding and women some rather unique opportunities been unquestionably the most dynamic Fellow "man" was right. Australia, in the Association's seventy-two year they told us, had developed as a man's facilities is concerned, we still aren't is in that of club administration. Cur­ getting a lot of the cake. In many cases, rently, SPRA mirrors the Australian history. In less than a decade, it has country for most of its history. It emerged as the largest and most active was sports crazy, but sport had been we just pick at the crumbs. sports scene in its dearth of capable, dedicated women administrators. Above sport and recreation body on.any Aust­ developed In Australia by men, for It would be easy to blame the sit­ ralian campus. While the traditional men exclusively. all others, this is the reason Australian uation on a chauvanistic society. No sportswomen arc still in the wilderness competitive sports have received con­ one denies that a lot of girls grow up when it comes to getting top class facil­ tinued support, the area of recreation With history against them, it is indeed believing that sport and vigorous physical ities, funding for coaching schemes or and social sport has gathered greater and a wonder that Australian women have activity is more the domain of their the media attention they deserve. Through greater momentum. Two full-time made such an incredible impact on brothers and boyfriends than themselves. its club administration or student exec­ recreation officers are employed to the sporting world since the turn of Sex-role socialisation is enormously utive, SPRA provides students with an manage the Association's busy calendar the century. From the beginning of the potent. The tragedy is that studies of excellent training ground. Whether they of recreation classes. official entry of women into the Olympic Australian girls, show that they begin intend to continue in sports administ­ Games, there has been a series of success­ their physical decline at ten years of ration or not, they can profit by learning The Martial Arts have thrived on ful Australians. age! Since it Is women who miss out skills at this level, that will unquestionably campus as have a variety of sports related Fanny Durack was our first female in this situation, it is women who must help them for the rest of their lives. service facilities: fitness assessment, Olympic champion when she won the take responsibility for changing it. The opportunities to do this at a relat­ massage and physiotherapy services, 100 metres freestyle in Stockhom in The current boom in concern for ively early age, especially for women, weight training and a sports shop. We 1912, followed closely by her team mate health and fitness is encouraging because are scant elsewhere. take it for granted, but one wonders how the early rugby players showering Wilhimina Wylie. Since then, outstanding it has reached so many women. Some SPRA offers every woman on campus women like Decima Norman, Marjorie are learning to appreciate their bodies, the opportunity to become involved in their pigeon loft, or the women hockey Jackson, Shirley Strickland, Dawn Fraser, and feel comfortable with them for as either participant or administrator. players In their full length skirts, would Margaret Court, Heather McKay, Evonnc the first time In their lives. Today It's your chance to do something positive make of the changes since they ran Cawlcy, Betty Cuthbcrt, Shane Gould, it's okay, trendy in fact, to be seen in both for yourself and for women's sport around the rough ground of George Jan Stephenson, Tracy Wickham and leotards or running gear, or even lifting and recreation. Street a generation ago. Raylcne Boyle, have Riven Australian weights. But we should remember that women's sport in Australia a rock solid the opportunities to be involved in and illustrious foundation. something healthy and physical are ^0 . UNIVERSITY\ The Students' Guide to Subversive Groups and Terrorist Organisations at the University of Queensland The Marquis de Sade has been spinning the picture tube of a television receiv­ in his grave with pure ecstacy. Keep er". (Old Chinese proverb.) Reading the list of Clubs and Societies at the clear unless Into SdM. LAW SOCIETY - Dangerous extremists Student Union is a highly deceptive pastime. ENGLISH STUDENTS SOCIETY - demanding Justice for everyone Irre­ What reads on paper like innocent enough groups Radical Pommie pressure ^roup on spective of how much Income tax you campus. Can always be recognised avoid paying. Lack of self-Interest are actually subversive terrorist groups which plan by "Nuke Northern Ireland" badges breeds a head-in-the-clouds attitude. to destroy our way of life. SWAPO presidential on lapels. Strange ethnic groupl E.U,S. (ENGINEERING UNDERGRAD­ MEDICAL SOCIETY - Remember Dr candidate, RORY LYONS, gives the run-down on UATE SOCIETY) - These subversives Jeckyll, Dr Phibes, Dr No, Dr Franken­ what these organisations are really up to. have a really Insidious way of destroy­ stein? You ought to see what these ing the fabric of society. Pisspot medical madmen can do to the human engineers designing things which fall or sub-human form once they get a bit down and fuck up. BAD people. of funding behind them. Don't go near When an innocent young student is AMNESTY INTERNATIONAL - World­ them, unless you want to end up as on FINE ARTS SOCIETY - Have determ­ first exposed to the University, he wide group dedicated to the springing experiment. or she is subjected to a mind- ofknovjn political terrorists who have ined what works of art are worth found themselves In the can at some pinching when the Revolution comes. MUSIC STUDENTS SOCIETY - Social buggering array of political options programming by the playing of Revo­ time or another. Membership Is If you want to profit massively from and philosophies, as well as verit­ lutionary Music. Know your "Inter­ essential If you become a member of a proletarian revolution, then this Is able cartloads of elephant shit nationale". any of these other clubs. foryou. propounded by everyone who NEWMAN SOCIETY - Thinks that Paul thinks they know anything about AUSTRALIA/ISRAEL COMMITTEE - Newman is god. Transferring oper­ FILM & VIDEO CLUB - This subver­ everything. Made up of people who send full ations to Northern Ireland to bring sive group intends to corrupt society shoe-boxes of uranium to Fictitious the Word of Paul to the heathens. In and pumpkin scones by producing addresses in Israel every week, and In the process of making lots of bombs. The purpose of this article is to sift return get the bits and pieces to build lots and lots of kiddy-porn the shit from the sense, dellniate the a fairly effective thermo-nuclear dev­ PEACE AND ANTI-NUCLEAR GROUP - Makes lots and lots of bombs (non- dickheads from the Dialectics, compare ice. If you're into the ultimate orgasm, FRIENDS OF THE AU.S. - Who are nuclear). cranks and communists, and assassinate this is for you. they trying to kid? A.U.S. has no arseholes and anarchists. In other words, PHARMACEUTICAL STUDENTS we are perpetrating an expose of all the ASSOCIATION - The BAD ones. They Insidious little political groups, no matter concoct all sorts of heinous mixtures, how benign tliey may appear; groups the sort that leave you paralysed from that Invariably sprout like Samford the eyelides down for 10 years or so. Meanies in an environment of intellectual A VOID. arguments and counterpoints, exclusions, PHOTOCLIQUE - Nudge, nudge, wink, nervous breakdowns, and suicides. wink, say no more. Avoid at all costs. Your writer assumes an intelligent PRO-LIFE - Extremist group campaign­ and in-depth knowledge, understanding ing for capital punishment and life- and hatred of the more mundane political imprisonment for prostitutes (which groups on this campus, such as the Young Is where their appelation comes from). Labor Club, the Young Liberal Club, the PSYCHOLOGY STUDENTS ASSOCIA­ Young Nationals, the Hitler Youth, and TION - Incredibly dangerous people - T.E.A.S. Instead, we will concentrate upon those little-known political organ­ known to have caused death through isations which attract the politically boredom of over 500 people since the uninitiated and unstable at this insti­ black day this society was formed. tution, who nonetheless would relish QLD UNI SEVENTH-DAY ADVENTIST being involved in sociopathlc organi­ SOCIETY - Initiators of the Save-the- sations of terror and destruction. Dingo campaign on this campus. Your intrepid reporter risked life and RUSSIAN SOCIETY - Ail they can do limb in compiling this report - under­ is sit around trying to work out who standably, the groups did not want their will really win the next war. Boring • covers being blown wide open, to expose BUSHWALKING CLUB - Tend to have friends. Probably a front for the CIA stuff. on campus. their true political tendencies. Of course, wild sado-masochistic orgies out in the SOCIETY OF ECONOMICS AND GAY SOLIDARITY - Concerned with the violence and intimidation that I was middle of nowhere. The bramble- COMMERCE STUDENTS (SECS) - If whipping is NOT pleasant. the plight of homosexual Polish metal subject to, and the numerous attempts there's one thing titat this group Is workers ond shipwrights. upon my life and property, don't bear C.AA (COMMUNITY AID ABROAD) - interested in, it's sexual perversion. mentioning In an unbiased political All I could determine about this little GAMES SOCIETY - What an obscure Imagine twisting your name just to report, but 1 can assure you that once lot Is that they stand for the spread little secret society this one is! All that fit in a double-meaning like that I get out of this hospital, I wilt sue the of AIDS (Arsehole Invaders Death your intrepid reporter could determine STUDENTS INTERNATIONAL MEDI­ bastards to the hilt. Sentence) to every community In the is that they like blowing things up. TATION SOCIETY - Wow - Meditating world. (Very weird!) (Speaking of getting out of this hosp­ GERMAN STUDENTS SOCIETY - All on the overthrow of reactionary ital, I'm finding it rather difficult at the CHESS CLUB - Not to be confused with they can do is sit around trying to capitalist society. Works a lot better moment. You can't even reach through the CH.E.S.S. Club, which make work out who really did win the War. than my J oh B-P voodoo doll. the bars on the window, because the silly explosive "people-killing" devices. Boring stuff. (See also Japanese SPELEOLOGICAL SOCIETY - Would shirts they give you button down the This club Is Investigating means of Society.) back. However, by sneaky questioning you trust people who hide in caves removing the bourgeous element from all the time? of the staff, I am about to determine the board (Kings, Queens, Knights GOVERNMENT STUDENTS ASSOCIA- the political affiliations of this hospital, STUDENT LIFE CLUB - Another etc.). Very revolutionary, but not very TION - Beware walking past the door of clever front. With a name like this, I hope to bring you a complete report practical, and pretty bloody boring. the 6SA Common Room in the soon.) you'd expect them to be getting C.H.E.S.S. (CHEMICAL ENGINEERING Michie Building - sudden gusts of hot But I digress. We have below a list of pissed down the Regatta all the time. STUDENTS SOCIETY) - If bomb- air abound. When they realise that those organisations whose rather in- All they do Is make bombs. buiiding Is your forte, then go no actions speak louder than words, they ocuous titles belie their fanatical dcvoijon THE NAVIGATORS - A really popular further. You too can help build could be dangerous — if they stay to the violent overthrow of life as we group on campus. Will navigate you really amazing explosive devices. (Non- awake. know and hate it. anywhere you want to go at Unl, when smokers preferred.) you are too pissed to think straight. COMPUTER CLUB - Computer crime, HUMAN MOVEMENT STUDENTS SOC­ UNI-QUE FOLK CLUB - Very suspic­ tax evasion (see Law Society notes), IETY - Do they really sneak around ABORIGINAL LAND RIGHTS SUPP­ ious. No-one actually knows what they and "how to make love to your com­ sewers with flashlights? ORT GROUP - A fynatlcal right-wing do. Rumour has It tltat they produce puter" courses available. They are INTERNATIONAL SOCIALISTS - group that makes huge donations to thermo-nuclear devices. really boring revolutionaries. Extreme right-wing terrorists who VETERINARY STUDENTS ASSOCIA­ tfie Bjelke-Petersen Foundation. They wholeheartedly believe in the master are all after knighthoods. DEBATING CLUB - True revolution­ TION - All of them are vivisectionlsts aries. Discussions of the worker's race of International Socialists. All who do obscene experiments on anim­ INTERNATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF others will be exterminated. ECONOMICS AND COMMERCE control of the means of production, als like putting cats heads where their Marx, and the economic bases of JAPANESE SOCIETY - See German (AI.E.&E.a).- They can't even spell bums should be, and vice versa, all capital-oriented societies. Also make Society. out their Initials correctly, not even for their own personal edification. highly explosive bombs in spare time. JOURNALISM STUDENTS ASSOCIA­ bothering to hide the fact that they Fun crowd. TION - If you want to be involved in YOGA SOCIETY - See S.I.M.S. Two are a FAKE. This Is o humungous REAL power, try Jingoism. You too heads are better than one. International spy-ring, probably based DENTAL STUDENTS ASSOCIATION - Torture technique par excellence - can be Minister of Propaganda. As Mao on a user-pays, cost-effective mer­ Tse Tung said, "Power comes out of cenary approarJi, Mamthon Man has nothing on this. 21 gyr CAP-STAieS MAS Al^ ACC UP H\S St£Bt^, ABOVE 6ApS1AtKS' ^:VTHOl»Se... Two TONMeS o^ e&<&s.'.' Hr=. Qt/n-OtSg. tS A... I

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Tam^dfL Connpiled by KAREN VENZKE

ACQUISITIONS 1973-1983. Univ­ PHOTOGRAPHS by Linda McCart­ ersity of Qld Art Museum. From ney. Milbunt Galleries, Logan Road November 2. VVooloongabba. Until November 20. The University Art Museum's 'Ac­ Probably Linda McCartney's great­ quisitions 1973-1983' is as much an est handicap against rccognilion in explanation of the emination of her own right, as a photographer, the University collection as a simple is being married to Paul. exhibition of a series of artists. Becavisc of the connection, people Although the Museum wasn't built lend lo think she managed to achieve her until 1973, the actual collection was high quality shots of personalities with begun 30 years beforehand by Dr Duhig expensive equipment and his connections. and Professors Cummings and Richards In reality, the reverse is true. She nicl (now better known for the libraries and Paul in the process of freelance photo­ buildings named after them) using money graphy in New York, after having been left to the University by John Darnell. commissioned to pliotograph people like the Rolling Stones, Bob Dylan, Jim Morr­ The choice of art tended to be from ison, Jimi Hcndrix, Janis Joplin and John struggling new artists, on advice from Lennon, uinon^t others. people like Lloyd Rees, to give them support, rather than just collecting work Linda's credibility also suffered from from 'safe' or dead artists. her maiden name - Eastman - and the The collection was revitalised in Ihe incorrect linking of her with the Kastman- late 1960's, througli 'time and endless Kodak group. Regardless of these handi­ committees', accordmg to an explanation caps, she has managed to produce some of the Museum's history. It gained a top-grade photography in her lime. new reputation because of its innovative Her style is largely self-formed as, like purchasuig at a time when there was both many of the great photographers of the established gallery caution and a great past, she chose not lo have any speci­ deal of rubbish being produced as a side fic photographic training and settled for effect of the 60's boom. an Art History degree from Ihe Uni­ versity of Arizona. Additionally, she mechanics of photography - she employs a route from London to Paris to New When the Art Museum was finally someone to develop and print all her York. That Australia is the next desti­ built, the collection gained a home with tends to shun the artificiality tliat cam- etas make possible - the posed shots, work - she Fits directly into my ideal, nation says something about our rise reasonable tenure, and the current at least, of photographic philosophy. in esteem in international cultural exhibition, like many held by the Mus­ clever darkroom techniques and even cropping of photographs and use of The current collection of work, en- circles. eum, has largely been organised by tilled simply 'Photographs', has been JOHN HENZELL students. light meters. Combined with a dislike for the touring the world since 1982, following JOHN HENZELL 23 \ REVIEWS

THE MT COOTHA RESTAURANT, eateries. Aerogard is recommended Mt Cootha. over Chanel No 5. As students gradually work their Aside from that, most of the restaur­ ant is average for establishments of this way towards completing their de­ type. The service is hardly a topic of grees, they are faced with a series of conversation, the interior setting is arduous tasks. The minor ones the standard terra cotta, and there (passing exams for instance) are isn't anything on the menu that most nothing compared to the REALLY haven't read before. All were highly important decision - where to go competent if unremarkable. for the graduation dinner. This continued into the prices, which The choice is difficult; il has to be ranged around the S5 mark for entrees, somewhere good enougli to go back to, S9-S18 for main course, and S3.50 for to reminisce about life as a grotty under­ the desserts. graduate, yet still be within the realms When our meals arrived, they broke of the sUident budget. from this averageness by being simply The newly opened Mt Cootha restaur­ excellent. Althougli simply prepared, ant fits tl)c bill successfully. Of course, they are subtly spiced and tlie Veal, the restaurant's greatest benefit is its Chicken and Reef Fish we tried were location. Tlie view from the top of the downed with an enthusiasm broken mountain is the rival of the old Muddies only to slap the occasional mosquito. location or the current Fountain Room, The desserts are piggery plus. The and the Kiosk has been restored from a Mousse, Cheesecake and Rum Crepe gmngy little tourist cafe of six months disappeared at a similar rate to the ago, to an open, uncluttered dining area. main course. The best advantage over any other At the end, the cost for three people restaurant in Brisbane is the natural for I'A courses each and wine, was a air flow, assisted by ceiling fans, through reasonable S50. Great value considering the wide, wide opening windows tliat the food and the setting. would make air conditioning seem to I'm seriously considering the Mt be a travesty against nature. Cootha Restaurant for my graduation Mosquitoes are att unwanted side dinner. I hope they're still operating effect of tills, but anything beats the in 1993. JOHN HENZELL air conditioned sterility of most other • V.' ::.;-:?^w'^^.t^•:;i^•^;;^:.•:^;

THE GUMNUT GOURMET. Water­ S2.75 for Chicken Cordon Bleu (a chic­ works Road, Ashgrove. ken, ham and cheese combination). For those disillusioned witit Bris­ Salad is extra at 70c per serve making it possible to eat for a whole S3,00. bane's choice of lunch spots, take If you sit inside, you'll find it im­ heart. The Gumnut Gourmet on possible to ignore the cake window - Waterworks Rd, West Ashgrove as we did. Tlie American Chocolate will revive the spirits as well as the Shortcake won a vote, but tlie more appetite. Lying just beyond guilt-ridden side of us pondered the Brisbane's western trend belt, it Carrot Cake, and Zucchini and Walnut is a simple, yet very positive, eating cake. It was the Blackforest Torte that happening. won out in the end, however, and was Lured by its 7 day a week attitude, 1 triumphantly whisked off for private and a friend crept out one Saturday delectation. Cappucino, tea and coffee are available as are cold drinks from the afternoon in search of take home nour­ fridge. Service was prompt and friendly. ishment, and found the clean tables in The Gumnut Gourmet provides a spacious green and white surrounds too catering service and there are plans to tempting. Indeed so was the menu - open on Thursday, Friday and Saturday chalkboard style, with prices indicated nights for late meals, coffee etc. - a much appreciated rarity. Lunch for 2 including coffee and In addition to the usual deli fare of dessert all under $10 is a rare and insp­ cold vitties - ham, cheeses etc., the iring experience, as those who search Gumnut Gourmet offers a hot menu yet will know. The Gumnut Gourmet for take-away or sit down consumption. will restore your faith in lunchmg out. The prices are a definite digestive JO COLLINS aid. Hot disiies range from $1.50 for Spanokopita and Quiche, 51.65, to

KASHMITU CURRY KING: BYO Wedgewood" prints, greenery and fresh sisted of traditional strips of home-made nastursiums on each table. SWEET PATOOTIE, 480 St Pauls Restaurant and Takeaway. Shop Terrace, the Valley. pasta with chicken, tasty mushrooms, There was a long interval before our tomato, herbs and spices and garnished 5, 57 McGregor Terrace. Bardon, selection of main dishes arrived. Afghani It is perhaps natural that a rest­ Phone 369 2838. with a bay leaf. Chicken Karahi ($6,20), casseroled'with aurant situated adjacent to the I selected the Lasapia which was a capsicum, tomato and beans was pro­ R.N.A. grounds should engender coalescence of traditional mince in soft Shadid Masood shouldn't worry nounced "a winner". Biryani ($1.90), some of the joviahty the Exhibition pasta with hot salami, onion and chicken so much. The Kashmiri Curry King, rice with vegetables, complemented a brings to Brisbane each year. The and represented not only one of the most his restaurant, may not equal very oily, peppercorn studded Chicken success of Dr. Milcham Hayes' novel Lasagnas in Brisbane but one of the hedonist days on the houseboats - Kashmiri ($6.20). We were told the attempts to provide good food at best. but his mother sure can cook. Beef-Konna ($6.50), beef chunks in However, the mam courses were un­ ^ curry sauce was excellent, but it dis­ reasonable prices with live enter­ tainment (3 piece jazz band) is doubtedly overshadowed by the superb appeared too rapidly for anyone to desserts. My companion chose the confirm this impression. evidenced by the cult following Eight of us trooped upstairs bearing that Sweet Patootie is already smooth Strawberries Romanoff which many lins of Toohey's in anticipation of The instant empty plate syndrome contained fresh, sweet, plump straw­ eyc-waterinR curries, and despite Shadid's also applied to Lamb Roghan Josh generating. berries while I opted for one of the insistence that restraint was the go here, ($6.95). The hungry person hunched several . varieties of home-made ice­ we weren't disappointed. over it, looked up only long enou^ to As well as the simple, rustic interior, creams. The latter was not only taste­ The blackboard menu reflected the say it was spicy but sligtitly overcooked, Sweet Patootie extends to accomodate fully presented but could only be des­ restaurant owners' varied cultural back­ while around him battles raged for a relaxed and spacious garden dining cribed as a culinary delight and a must ground, with dishes from Kashmir, Afg­ possession of t!\e superb, absolutely area well suited to Queensland's sunny for those contemplating a visit to Sweet hanistan and Pakistan. scnimptious Paralhas ($ 1.30), perfect for days. Patootie. The small but adequate blackboard- We began our meal crunching huge scooping up subtly flavoured vegetarian Unfortunately at Sweet Patootie the crispy Pappadums (25c), and shared GajjarAlu Mutter (S5.SO). style menu features traditional and nouvelle Italian cuisine as well as steak spirit of joviality is carried too far in that entrees of Seek Kebab ($3.50) and The service varied from attentive to the peripatetic service resembles at times chickpea Pakoras m»de with eggplant, and veal dishes. Entrees range from frenzied, with frequent enquiries as to $2.70 for Minestrone to $5 forMoussaka. a comedy of errors. Nevertheless the dipped in a yoghurt and green chili whether we were all happy. service is friendly and Maitre D' attempts sauce ($3.00). The yoghurt Lassi ($1.50) It was.fortunate that we didn't want to ensure everyone has a pleasant evening. was sweet instead of authentically salty, dessert, since none was offered. There Opting to forego the entrees, my Sweet Patootie is higjily recommended but the skewered Beef TIkka ($3.40), was good, albeit lukewarm coffee ($ 1.00), partner and I munched on the crisp for those who enjoy good, inexpensive after being marinated for a week, was and we departed replete and happy, gariic bread and proceeded to sample food, live entertainment and simple but described as "spicy and a bit too auth­ leaving a beaming Shadid exhausted and the main courses chosen from the 7 pleasant surroundings. entic". still exuding goodwill to all. selections ranging in price from pizzas JOHN DEVEREUX The restaurant seats 30 people and has ($5 plus) to Lasagna (at $8). My com­ been recently redecorated in navy and CHRISTINE FOGG panion could not find adequate praise orange high tech, featuring "Indian goes for Mama's Fetuccini ($6) which con­ iiiiiiiiiiHiitiiiiiHiiiHiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiniiiiiiiiiiiiiiuniiiii 24 • CINEMA\

Art of Looking Hurt

CAREFUL, HE MIGHT HEAR herself in a bid for apparent security, YO'I. Hoyts Cinema. attempts to purchase from P.S. the The saddest thing about 'Careful, love she could not win from his fatlter, because she was unable to give it her­ He Might Hear You', is that it had self. Instead of putting unsubtle pro­ so much potential, and featured so fundities into the mouth of the child, Prole meets Pygmalion much talent, that its creators held whose innocence, no doubt was intended the elements of a masterpiece of to be unwittingly wise, the film should film, but somehow failed in their have focussed on Vanessa. EDUCATING RITA: starring intellectual waitress in a trendy restaur­ co-ordination. The story is too predictable, and painfully so in the end, and at times Michael Caine and Julie Walters. ant, where patrons and staff argue over It's as if they simply lacked the energy first performance dates of Shaw's plays. to exploit their considerable resources. so obvious that it fails to be convincing. Hoyts Cinema. The result is that, as a film aimed at the It is melodramatic, in true soap opera Frank (Michael Caine) is an alco­ Rita relishes her new lifestyle until her trendy best friend attempts suicide. heart, it doesn't reach far enougli. style. The whole cast has the "hurt holic English professor in an With tltis, and the discovery that Frank But as long as people feel sorry for look" down to a fine art, and as soon English open university. He dozes is even more of a slosh tlian before, cute little boys with tear-streaked cheeks, as a smile threatened to surface, the through his editorials because his Rita realises, surprise surprise, that the films like this one will continue to ap­ ominous shadow of Vanessa's chauffeur students are boring farts, and upper middle classes are leading tlieir pear. The film relies largely on pity for would instantly banish it. Tlie intensity because he's the most boring fart own lives of quiet desperation. 'P.S.' (a 'post-script' to his late mother's of the film leaves you feeling as though of all. Supposedly a poet, he The plot resists the obvious. Frank life), the pawn in a custody battle bet­ you've come out of a two-hour exam, witii exactly that degree of depression. hasn't written in decades, and and Rita do not become lovers. Frank ween rich and beautiful Aunt Vanessa does not start writing poetry again. and poor, aslhniatic Aunt Lila. No prize But, vitriol aside, there must be under security of tenure, he has for guessing who wins. no incentive to start. The film ends with Rita giving Frank something to be said for the film. All a haircut and packinghimoff to Australia, His dual life takes him fiom the that money can't have gone to waste; His quiet decay is shattered by tlie a'land where everything is new and fresh, Depression-tainted but happy life with at least it was wisely spent in terms of intmsion of a working class hairdresser, or so he's been told. 1 only hope he Lila to the lavish splendour (but emot­ cast. Wendy Hughes, Geraldine Turner, Rita (Julie Walters) who approaches doesn't end up at this campus; there ional emacialion) of Vanessa's mansion. John Hargreaves and Robyn Nevin, not him for tuition. Rita senses there is are enough of his kind here already. There she attempts to mold him into to mention Nicholas Gledhill, are cer­ more to life than the working class Educating Rita premiered in Brisbane the well-bred young man she imagines tainly admirable, as is the excellent despair of singing in pubs and having with cosmetics giveaways, and a ladies' he should be. Needless to say, P,S. is photography, especially the aesthetic babies, and she asks Frank to do a Pyg­ screening. The blue rinse set were out miserable there, but is forced by law vision of Aunt Vanessa's domain. And malion on her. in force. I'm not sure if tlie ladies in to remain. so, if you can believe someone really The educated classes are always tlie audience were ever liberated by The true tragedy of the stor\' lies not would call a child 'P.S.' you may be fascinated by tlie odd prole who shows reading Chekhov and Blake, but they with P.S., but with Vanessa (perfectly able to salvage something from tlie a bit of spunk, so Frank takes her on giggled a lot. portrayed by Wendy Hughes), who, waste. witlt vigour. His patient efforts are TIM LOW stifled in the image she has cast for ANNIE O'HARA successful, and Rita becomes a pseudo- TWISTED SEQUEL

PSYCHO II. Anthony Perkins and Bates' cellar lo smoke dope and make Vera Miles. Albert Cinema. out), there arc u number of parts that The vast majority of all reviews of will show the Psycho cultisls in the audience; some sections of Psycho IPs sequels begin by explaining the dialogue is taken word for word from difficulty faced by the directors the original, and Sam and Vera Miles in meeting the standards of the are now married. original. The most common failing of sequels While that's true of Psycho jl, they is their reticence to lake risks, and just had the additional problems of having relying on putting out a rehashed version a sequel 22 years after the original. of the first movie. Psycho II misses out In this time, Psycho 1 (as it inevitably on this by making the film in an almost will be called from now on), was able entirely diffcreiU way to Psycho. Rather to achieve a cult status that only comes than the reasonably siraiglitforwurd witli age, and a whole generation of Psycho storyline, the new movie has moviegoers grew up, most of whom twist after twist after twist that leaves hadn't seen the original. the audience totally confused about They had to make a movie that whal is going lo happen next. appealed to both Psycho buffs who Best of all, it has true suspense to it. could repeat the entire dialogue, and Having seen The FA'II Dead, Slumber people who hadn't seen Psycho I at all. Parly Massacre, Friday the Thirteenth, Wltat has been produced is a film Creep Show, The Hxorcist I and II. that appeals to both groups, and builds Halloween I, II i«ul III clc,ctc,etc, oitc fortunately icgicsscs to blood horror year. It would be a false nationalisin onto the original in a way thai enhances gels very weary of the cheap modern just before the end - a tragic drop in to claim the success to the Australian the viewer's opinions of both movies, method of using buckets of blood lo the movie's quality. director, but this movie can teach some create horror. P.sycIio II uses an iilmost Psycho II, rather than just being the very pertinent lessons lo the bulk of Willie the movie has been modernised Hollywood movie makers. Hitclicockian suspense thai is far better best sequel I've seen, will come close lo (Bates Motel is now a prostitution and rating as Iho host movie I've seen all JOHN HENZELL drug centre and teenagers sneak inlo than modern 'blood' movies, but un- 25 \ REVIEWS

THE MT COOTHA RESTAURANT, eateries. Aerogard is recommended Mt Cootha. over Chanel No 5. As students gradually work their Aside from that, most of the restaur­ ant is average for establishments of this way towards completing their de­ type. Tlie service is hardly a topic of grees, they are faced with a series of conversation, the interior setting is arduous tasks. The minor ones the standard terra cotta, and there (passing exams for instance) are isn't anything on the menu that most nothing compared to the REALLY haven't read before. All were highly important decision - where to go competent if unremarkable. for the graduation dinner. This continued into the prices, which The choice is difficult; it has to be ranged around the S5 mark for entrees, somewhere good enough to go back to, S9-SI8 for main course, and S3.50 for to reminisce about life as a grotty under­ the desserts. graduate, yet still be within the realms When our meals arrived, they broke of the student budget. from this averageness by being simply The newly opened Ml Cootha restaur­ excellent. Althougii simply prepared, ant fits the bill successfully. Of course, they are subtly spiced and die Veal, the restaurant's greatest benefit is ils Chicken and Reef Fish we tried were location. The view from the top of the downed with an enthusiasm broken mountain is the rival of the old Muddies only to slap the occasional mosquito. location or the current Fountain Room, The desserts are piggery plus. Tlie and the Kiosk has been restored from a Mousse, Cheesecake and Rum Crepe grungy little tourist cafe of six months disappeared at a similar rate to the ago, to an open, uncluttered dining area. main course. Tlie best advantage over any other Al the end, the cost for three people restaurant in Brisbane is the natural for 2'A. courses each and wine, was a air flow, assisted by ceiling fans, through reasonable S50. Great value considering tlie wide, wide opening windows that the food and the setting. would make air conditioning seem to I'm seriously considering the Mt be a travesty against nature. Cootha Restaurant for my graduation Mosquitoes are an unwanted side dinner. I hope they're still operating effect of Uiis, but anything beats the in 1993. air conditioned sterility of most other JOHN HENZELL

THE GUMNUT GOURMET. Water­ S2.75 for Chicken Cordon Bleu (a chic­ works Road, Ashgrove. ken, ham and cheese combination). Salad is extra at 70c per serve making For those disillusioned with Bris­ if possible to eat for a whole S3.00. bane's choice of lunch spots, take If you sit inside, you'll find it im­ heart. The-Gumnut Gourmet on possible to ignore tlie cake window - Waterworks Rd, West Ashgrove as we did. Tlie American Chocolate will revive the spirits as well as the Shortcake won a vote, but the more appetite. Lying just beyond guilt-ridden side of us pondered the Brisbane's western trend belt, it Carrot Cake, and Zucchini and Walnut is a simple, yet very positive, eating cake. It was the Blackforest Torte that happening. won out m the end, however, and was Lured by its 7 day a week attitude, I triumphantly whisked off for private and a friend crept out one Saturday delectation. Cappucino, tea and coffee are available as are cold drinks from the afternoon in search of take home nour­ fridge. Service was prompt and friendly. ishment, and found the clean tables m Tlie Gumnut Gourmet provides a spacious green and white surrounds too catering service and tliere are plans to tempting. Indeed so was the menu - open on Thursday, Friday and Saturday chdkboard style, with prices indicated nights for late meals, coffee etc. - a much appreciated rarity. Lunch for 2 including coffee and In addition to the usual deli fare of dessert all under $10 is a rare and insp­ cold vitties - ham, cheeses etc., the iring experience, as those who search Gumnut Gourmet offers a hot menu yet will know. The Gumnut Gourmet for take-away or sit down consumption. will restore your faith in lunchmg out. The prices are a definite digestive JO COLLINS aid. Hot dishes range from $1.50 for Spanokopita and Quiche, $1.65, to

KASHMTRl CURRY KING: BYO Wedgewood" prints, greenery and fresh SWEET PATOOTIE, 480 St Pauls sisted of traditional strips of home-made nastursiums on each table. Restaurant and Takeaway. Shop Terrace, the Valley. pasta with chicken, tasty mushrooms, 5, 57 McGregor Terrace, Bardon. There was a long interval before our tomato, herbs and spices and garnished selection of main dishes arrived. Afghani It is perhaps natural that a rest­ Phone 369 2838. with a bay leaf. Chicken Karahi ($6.20), casseroled with aurant situated adjacent to the I selected the Lasagna which was a capsicum, tomato and beans was pro­ R.N.A. grounds should engender coalescence of traditional mince in soft Shadid Masood shouldn't worry nounced "a winner". Biryani ($1.90), some of the joviahty the Exhibition pasta with hot salami, onion and chicken so much. The Kashmiri Curry King, rice with vegetables, complemented a brings to Brisbane each year. The and represented not only one of the most his restaurant, may not equal very oily, peppercorn studded Chicken success of Dr. Mileham Hayes' novel Lasagnas in Brisbane but one of the hedonist days on the houseboats - Kashmiri (S6.20). We were told the attempts to provide good food at best. but his mother sure can cook. Beef.Komia ($6.50), beef chunks in reasonable prices with live enter­ However, the mam courses were un­ curry sauce was excellent, but it dls- tainment (3 piece jazz band) is doubtedly overshadowed by the superb ' appeared too rapidly for anyone to desserts. My companion chose the confirm this impression. evidenced by the cult following Eight of us trooped upstairs bearing that Sweet Patootie is already smooth Strawberries Romanoff which many tins of Toohey's in anticipafion of The instant empty plate syndrome contained fresh, sweet, plump straw­ eye-waterinR curries, and despite Shadid's also applied to Lamb Roghan Josh generating. berries while I opted for one of the insistence that restraint was the go here, ($6.95). The hungry person hunched several . varieties of home-made ice­ we weren't disappointed. over it, looked up only long enough to As well as the simple, rustic interior, creams. The latter was not only taste­ The blackboard menu rcfiected the say it was spicy but sU^itly overcooked, Sweet Patootie extends to accomodate fully presented but could only be des­ restaurant owners' varied cultural back­ while around him battles raged for a relaxed and spacious garden dining cribed as a culinary delight and a must ground, with dishes from Kashmir, Afg­ possession of the superb, absolutely area well suited to Queensland's sunny for those contemplating a visit to Sweet hanistan and Pakistan. days. Patootie. scnimptious Parathas ($ 1.30), perfect for The small but adequate blackboard- We began our meal crunching huge scooping up subtly flavoured vegetarian Unfortunately at Sweet Patootie the crispy Pappadums (25c), and shared style menu features traditional and GajjarAlu Mutter ($5.50). nouvelle Italian cuisine as well as steak spirit of joviality is carried too far m that entrees of Seek Kebab ($3.50) and The service varied from alien live to the peripatetic service resembles at times chickpea Pakoras made with eggplant, and veal dishes. Entrees range from frenzied, with frequent enquiries as lo $2.70 for Minestrone to $5 for Moussaka. a comedy of errors. Nevertheless the dipped in a yoghurt and green chili whether we were all happy. service is friendly and Maitre D' attempts sauce (S3.00). The yogliurt Lassi ($1.50) It was.fortunate that we didn't want to ensure everyone has a pleasant evening. was sweet instead of authentically salty, dessert, since none was offered. There Opting to forego the entrees, my Sweet Patootie is hi^y recommended but the skewered Beef Tikka ($3.40), was good, albeit lukewarm coffee ($1.00), partner and I munched on the crisp for those who enjoy good, inexpensive after being marinated for a week, was and we departed replete and happy, garlic bread and proceeded to sample food, live entertainment and sunple but described as "spicy and a bit too auth­ leaving a beaming Shadid exhausted and the main courses chosen from the 7 pleasant surroundings. entic". still exuding goodwill to all. selections ranging in price from pizzas JOHN DEVEREUX The restaurant seats 30 people and has ($5 plus) to Lasagna (at $8). My com­ been recently redecorated in navy and CHRISTINE FOGG panion could not find adequate praise orange high tech, featuring "Indian goes niitiiiHiiiiiiHiiHiiiiiiiiiiiiiniiiiuiiiiiiiHiiiniiimniiiiiiiiHii! for Mama's Fetuccini ($6) which con­ 24 • Art of Looking Hurt

CAREFUL, HE MIGHT HEAR herself in a bid for apparent security, YO' I. Hoyts Cinema. attempts to purchase from P.S. the The saddest thing about 'Careful, love she could not win fiom his father, He Might Hear You', is that it had because she was unable lo give it her­ so much potential, and featured so self. Instead of putting unsubtle pro­ fundities into the mouth of tlie child, Prole meets Pygmalion much talent, that its creators held whose innocence, no doubt was intended the elements of a masterpiece of to be unwittingly wise, the film should film, but somehow failed in their have focussed on Vanessa. co-ordination. EDUCATING RITA; starring intellectual waitress in a trendy restaur­ The story is too predictable, and Michael Caine and Julie Walters. ant, where patrons and staff argue over It's as if they simply lacked the energy painfully so in tlie end, and at times to exploit their considerable resources. Hoyts Cinema. first performance dates of Shaw's plays. so obvious that it fails to be convincing. Rita relishes her new lifestyle until The result is that, as a film aimed at the It is melodramatic, in true soap opera Frank (Michael Caine) is an alco­ her trendy best fiiend attempts suicide. heart, it doesn't reach far enougli. style. The whole cast has the "hurt holic English professor in an With tliis, and the discovery that Frank But as long as people feel sorry for look" down to a fine art, and as soon English open university. He dozes is even more of a slosh tlian before, cute little boys with tear-streaked cheeks, as a smile threatened to surface, the through liis editorials because his Rita realises, surprise surprise, that the films like this one will continue to ap­ ominous shadow of Vanessa's chauffeur students are boring farts, and upper middle classes are leading tlieir pear. The film relies largely on pity for would instantly banish it. The intensity because he's the most boring fart own lives of quiet desperation. 'P.S.' (a 'post-script' to his late mother's of the film leaves you feeling as thou^ of all. Supposedly a poet, he The plot resists the obvious. Frank life), the pawn in a custody battle bet­ you've come out of a two-hour exam, hasn't written in decades, and and Rita do not become lovers. Frank ween rich and beautiful Aunt Vanessa witli exactly that degree of depression. under security of tenure, he has does not start writing poetry again. and poor, asthmatic Aunt Lila. No prize But, vitriol aside, there must be no incentive to start. Tlie film ends with Rita giving Frank for guessing who wins. something to be said for the film. All a haircut and packinghim off to Australia, His dual life takes him from the that money can't have gone to waste; His quiet decay is shattered by tlie aMand where everything is new and fresh, Depression-tainted but happy life with at least it was wisely spent in terms of intmsion of a working class hairdresser, or so he's been told. I only hope he Lila to Ihe lavish splendour (but emot­ cast. Wendy Huglies, Geraldine Turner, Rita (Julie Walters) who approaches doesn't end up at this campus; there ional emaciation) of Vanessa's mansion. John Hargreaves and Robyn Nevin, not him for tuition. Rita senses there is are enough of his kind here already. There she attempts to mold him into lo mention Nicholas Gledhill, are cer­ more to life tlian the working class Educating Rita premiered in Brisbane the well-bred young man she imagines tainly admirable, as is the excellent despair of singing in pubs and having witli cosmetics giveaways, and a ladies' he should be. Needless to say, P.S. is photography, especially the aesthetic babies, and she asks Frank to do a Pyg­ screening. The blue rinse set were out miserable there, but is forced by law vision of Aunt Vanessa's domain. And malion on her. in force. I'm not sure if tite ladies in to remain. so, if you can believe someone really The educated classes are always the audience were ever liberated by The true tragedy of the story lies not would call a child 'P.S.' you may be fascinated by tlie odd prole who shows reading Chekhov and Blake, but they wilh P.S., but with Vanessa (perfectly able to salvage something from the a bit of spunk, so Frank takes her on giggled a lot. portrayed by Wendy Hugiies), who, waste. with vigour. His patient efforts are TIM LOW stifled in the image she has cast for ANNIE O'HARA successful, and Rita becomes a pseudo- TWISTED SEQUEL

PSYCHO II. Anthony Perkins and Bales' cellar to smoke dope and make Vera Miles. Albert Cinema. out), there arc a number of parts that The vast majority of all reviews of will show the Psycho cultisls in the audience; some sections of Psycho H's sequels begin by explaining the dialogue is taken word for word from difficulty faced by the directors the original, and Sam and Vera Miles in meeting the standards of the are now married. original. The most common failing of sequels While that's tme of Psycho 11, they is their reticence to take risks, and just had the additional problems of having relying on putting out a rehashed version a sequel 22 years after the original. of the first movie. Psycho II misses out In this time, Psycho I (as it inevitably on this by making the Him in an almost will be called from now on), was able entirely different way lo Psycho. Rather to achieve a cull status that only comes than the reasonably straiglillbrward wiUt age, and a whole generation of Psycho storyline, the new movie has moviegoers grew up, most of whom twist after twist after twist that leaves hadn't seen the original. the audience totally confused about They had to make a movie that what is going to happen next. appealed to both Psycho buffs who Best of all, it has true suspense lo it. could repeat the entire dialogue, and Having seen The livil Dead, Slumber people who hadn't seen Psycho I al all. Parly Massacre, Friday the Thirteenth, Wlvat has been produced is a lilm Ciecp Show, The Exorcist 1 and II, diat appeals to both groups, and builds Halloween I, H and III etc, etc, etc. oife forlunatcly regresses to blood horror year. It would be a false nationalism onto the original in a way Ihat enhances gels very weary of the cheap modern just before the end - a tragic drop in to claim the success lo the Australian the viewer's opinions of both movies. method of using buckets of blood lo the movie's quality. director, but this movie can leach some Psycho II. rather than just being Ihe very pertinent lessons to the bulk of Willie the movie has been modernised create horror. Psycho II uses an almost best sequel I've seen, will come close to Hollywood movie makers. (Bates Motel is now a prostitution and Hilchcuckian suspense that is far belter rating as the host movie I've seen all drug centre and teenagers sneak into than modern 'blood' movies, but un- JOHN HENZELL 25 [BOOKS zl

relevancy. The science fiction format is irrelevant in its own riglit except in its display of quite original imagination, but its importance lies in its parody of our worid today. A good example of this is the -system of education given to be operating in the year 4004 A.D. Learning is carried out by a series of peptide implants into the brain. These implants are little stores of knowledge. A class of people known as 'educers' control and monitor the process, ensuring the knowledge is incorporated to be used in socially acceptable ways. Some degree of free thouglit is tolerated as being a necessary part of any system, but nevertheless a watch is kept upon this. Is this really far removed from the educafion system of today? The characters in 'Valencies' are very much like people of today, except tliey have immortality. While perhaps not afraid of deatli or disease, they are just as neurotic and psychologically VALENCIES: Rory Barnes and vulnerable as twentieth century man, Damien Broderick. U. of Q. Press. stumbling their way througli marriage, S7.95. friendship, and infidelity. A BAG OF ROOSTERS: by Michael Leunig. Angus and Robertson. Works of fiction written by two Similarly the characters resemble us 'A Bag of Roosters' sees a rejuvenated Michael Leunig. His previous book, 'lite Bedtime Leunig', authors have always intrigued me, in their relationship to the political sys­ seemed a ilirowaway. a hastily scribbled 'contractual obligation' compared to his first two books. '...Roosters' shows the pathos and punnery, the insight and enigmatic optimistic pessimism of simply because I wonder how they tem, the benign dictatorship of the the Nation Review-era Leunig. A unique mixture oflaffs and reflection. manage the logistics of the writing. Empire. Never quite understanding it, A must for many Christmas stockings. In the case of 'Valencies' it almost unable to oppose it and ultimately MATTIVIAWSON seems like one author has composed dwelling in a resigned submission, they alisni, politics, and social action, in order the basic sentence while his co-author nevertheless lead lives as both hopeless authorities there were afraid that the to live on Dunk Island, isolated and breaking up of the colony could affect the has peered over his shoulder and sug­ and heroic as we lead today. secluded. security of these investments. gested thuijgs like '1 know a bigger word 'Valencies' is never an oppressive to use there,' or 'change this word and novel, due to the style of the writing. Banfield's decision to retreat to the the whole thing will be' much more It is a way of looking at life which is island must have been unusually complex The issue of separatism was soon esoteric' ultimately healthy, mixing humour with and troubled for a person whose life swallowed by the frenzied enthusiasm up to this point had been one of social No matter how the book was actually serious thought - and hke life, it doesn't for federation; but the problem of activism. Having worked as a journalist written, the leaning towards cleverness always work. Tlie important thing is, northern representation has lingered on a succession of newspapers in Victoria and intellectualism makes for uneven no matter how you approach 'Valencies' for a century without resolution, as and N.S.W., Banfield had moved to reading. Sometimes the word-plays - as a story, as a book of relationships, has the other major question of foreign Townsville in 1882 to work on The and conceptual jokes work and add as science fiction, as parody and social ownership of Queensland. Townsville Bulletin. something to the book, other times comment - whichever way appeals, Banfield's retreat from all of this it makes for enjoyable reading. It was during tliis period that Banfield is simplified in Noonan's account to a they appear simply pretentious. Clever­ tlirew himself into some of tlie social ness can be a dangerous tool - used RICHARD WHITAKER question of health. The other issues problems of the young state of Queens­ that undoubtedly clouded the decision for its own sake it isolates and alienates land. In articles and leaders In the paper, the reader. are overiooked. Il might seem a small Banfield wrote on issues such as the point, but it is indicative of the method Perhaps part of the problem lies in importation of black (slave) labour for not knowing for sure which way to used by tlie biographer. A DIFFERENT DRUMMER: Tlie the cane farms, the preservation of Decisions and choices are reduced take much of die writing. Little tongue- wildlife, and the question of separatism in-cheek expressions appear and diffuse Story of E.J. Banfield, tlie Beach­ from ideological or political/personal comber of Dunk Island. Michael for North Queensland. The biographer's relations to purely personal or psycho­ otherwise serious episodes. In places treatment of this area of Banfield's this is off-putting, but I think it is pro­ Noonan. U. of Q. Press. logical reasons. Banfield, as a conse­ life is, however, brief and unspecific. quence, is reduced from a social being, bably intentional, being a part of the In 1896, Ted Banfield first visited What could have been a fascinating book's parody of life and all its ambi- Dunk Island, off the coast of entwined in a series of polifical and history of the separatist movement social networks, to that standard bour­ valencies. Townsville, where he and his in the North, as it tied in with Banfield's It should be said that 'Valencies' geois figure of standard bourgeois bio­ wife Bertha were to spend the life, has been relegated to a few para­ graphies : the great eccen trie individualist. is described on its cover as being a work remaining 25 years of Ted's life. graphs of anecdote and summary. of science fiction while at the same Thus, the book recounts innumerable In its outline, the story is unre­ Of the issue, Noonan reveals only stories about Banfield the solitary beach­ time being a contemporary novel. Lab­ markable enough. In fact, it is this, elling ait is dangerous since it invites comber of Dunk Island who became the all sorts of generalisations and negative often difficult to accept the bio­ Separation... seemed doomed to perennial Honorary Warden of the Island in order preconceptions. In a well written novel grapher's bland and fulsome praise frustration. There were a number of reasons to protect its wildlife. Such stories for the actions of Banfield at this for this, among them the attitude of the though, are run of the mill; every house­ the setting, the form, and the nature of authorities in London, which was Ihat. as a the story should not detract from the stage of his life. ielff;<)\Trning colony, Queensland bad to hold has its own solitaries and eccentrics. essential character and spirit of the Of course, no one expects Michael formally request London to take action; What might have been a biography Uiat work. 'Valencies' is science fiction, Noonan to castigate his subject for not but nu'such request was forthcoming from linked political and social changes in the Queensland Parliament, because the colonial Queensland with the story of it is futuristic, it is full of strange gadgets toeing an ideologically sound line, but southern members, who wanted to keep on and places, but it is about human beings the biography lacks a sense of the critical, administering the whole colony, repeatedly one man, has ended up as a fullsome as they live and think today. of evaluation, and this is apparent at out-voted the northern separationists. On account of an individual. the other hand, it suited London to take no GEOFF VERTICAL The contemporary spirit of'Valencies' the stage in Bandeld's life when he action as many people in Britain had marks it as a work of social and individual decides to opt out of the worid of journ- invested in Qucciislaiid bonds and the ire AD E M Y GOLDC0A6T /^ My^ DRIVING SCHOOL ATTENTION JOURNO'S... "We teach right" What are you doing over the break? Like to earn a Serving all suburbs few extra dollars writing for Gold Coast Life 397 5257 magazine? Contact Anthony Stevens 205 2059 (075) 399228 $ 12 each for first 3 lessons on all cars on presentation of this ad to Academy Instructor BOOKS\

role theory that many social scientists THE AUSTRALIAN BALLET; RWOXWEIL now adopt. He says that role theory TWENTY ONE YEARS: by Charles shapes people and their activities to the Lisner. University of (^eensland requirements of the system. There is WHICH WAY .an essay about his friends in Birming­ Press. Hardback. $22.50. ham and a rather self-indulgent one This beautifully-bound book is the is UP? about his favourite composer, J.S. Bach. second from the founder of the The final essay can be likened to a Queensland Ballet Company - kind of self-analysis. It concerns intellec­ Charles Lisner QBE, whose history tuals and their work. The essay closes a in dance goes back to the Borovan- book which launches a bitter attacjc on sky Ballet, the predecessor of the oppression and the things that perpet?ate Australian Ballet Company. it. In it, Connell handles fundamental problems of immediate concern to 1983 is the 21st anniversary of the Essays on Class, Sex and CuHure leftist tlieoreticians and practitioners Australian Ballet and this critical apprais­ alike, as well as providing a source of al of that first 21 years could only have much up-to-date data. come from a man with such a long '. ^i '' And just a finishing touch for anyone association with Australian dance. serious enough to get this far; Connell Lisner encompasses the problems of ends his finalchapte r saying that wc must the Australian Ballet Company with not forget the importance of intellectuals. uncompromising forthriglitness - he RAY MOYNIHAN criticises the Ballet's administrators for spurning Australian choreographers who would give our ballet the distinctively Australian flavour which it lacks. THREADS FOR A BLIND CAR­ REHEARSALS He says; "Regrettably, apart from its PET WEAVER: Alison Ferrier. FOR THE wonderful dancers, tlie Australian Ballet 'Threads for a Blind Carpet Weaver' APOCALYPSE is Australian in name only ... (yet) there is Alison Ferrier's first book of by John Jigtierii is as much choreographic talent in Austra­ poetry. You may have seen her lia as there is in any otlier country in work, though, in a number of pub­ WHICH WAY IS UP?: Bob Connell. tlic worid". Allen & Unwin, Just as uncompromising is his praise lications including 'Maggies', 'Bor­ Bob Connell's new book 'Which for Australian dancers; for their talent, der Issue' and 'Grassroots'. Way is Up?' is a collection of his their professionalism and performing Her poems are of a caring nature, she essays that gives not only a compre­ competance - the equal, and perhaps the pays attention to the animals and land­ hensive insight into the nature and superior, of many oUier companies scapes of the environment. Reading them I felt the time honoured rhydims of the extent of the work and interests tlirougliout the world. He says; "Today the Australian Ballet observant mind. She combines the of this well-known Australian socio­ Company undoubtably ranks as one of beauty of the classic prose witii a par­ logist, but also a great deal of in­ the great ballet companies of the worid." liculariy individual imagery. formation on recent theoretical de­ Further; "It has always been my firm I saw an eagle velopments in the area of class, conviction that in proportion to its thermal riding culture and sex. Part One: Aquariui Fotiviil, May 73 population, there is more talent in Aust­ The tliread that runs through all ralia dian any other country in the worid. it left the forest thirteen essays, most of which date REHEARSALS FOR THE APOC­ soft like velvet between 1979 and 1981, is Connell's far below the river ALYPSE: by John Jiggens. just a chain of silver belief that social science is about hu­ It is ten years since the original It is familiar, the ongoing struggle man liberation. Those happy with the Nimbin Festival, that first flowering way power is wielded throughout the that poets and artists alike have defin­ worid will have fundamental problems of the counter-culture that left a ing their medium. with Connell's work. penuanent mark on the hinterland This is well illustrated by the two The style of writing in 'Which Way is of Northern New South Wales and poems 'Trapeze' and 'On a Winter Niglit'. Up?' is reassuringly down-to-earth, easy, in the heads of everyone who They are characteristic of a purifying and often verges on colloquial with the attended. John Jiggens captures the action by some poets. A 'let's get down use of words like 'bullshit' and 'silly' intensity of that experience in this to the core of what I want to say' feel­ ing. Poetry is letting go of hanging on. in discussions of complex theoretical ^hort book. positions. His style has a certain vitality, Poets can rarely be entirely separate' the essays are not devoid of the occas­ Jiggens, still an occasional contributor from their moods and as a part of the not ional witticism, and are decidedly pleas­ to the pages of Semper, and one of the so vicious circle, their moods can be ant reading in comparison to much of the founders of the Cane Toad Times, doesn't created by their surroundings. Tliis is print that academics are responsible for. give us a dry history or a run-down of why 'Downwardly Mobile in Red Hill' the organisational hassles of the festival, "There is no reason why AustraUan is perhaps more of an insist into The length of the essays is ideal, an but instead presents a heart-fell rendering average of about thirty pages; while ballet and the Australian Ballet Company Alison's motivations. She sees her work of the craziness and joy, the sense of should not dominate the dance horizons as giving her a feeling of wholeness. seemingly a trite observafion, neverthe­ possibility that Nimbin was built on, less a necessary and practical one. of the twenty-first century." None of the poems are particularly and intensified, in those balmy days of Lisner describes with vitality and pass­ lengthy. They ofien zoom in for a close The subject matter of the essays is, the eariy Whitlam government. to say tlie least, diverse, ranging from ion the birth and growth to maturity of look at the characters, but just as effect­ Freud to Althusser to masturbation to The contradictions tliat had to arise Australian ballet, and tlie reader can ively capture the moods of an entire Bach's Mass in B minor. in such a diverse group of Festival-goers sense the pride he feels for being a part lifestyle or a passing moment. The collection opens with a refreshing arc surgically displayed and the radical of the development of dance in this The drawings in the book are by look at Freud, in which Connell argues response to the cosmic ascendancy, the country. He passes Uirougli the various Emilia Cole, a Polish painter and sculptor that the more radical of Freud's insights worshipping of Hare Gumboot, is loving­ transitions of the Australian Ballet, • now living in Lismore. The drawings are have been ignored or subsumed by main­ ly chronicled. delving along the way into the roles of very sensitive and suit the poems well. stream criticism. Connell finds that The recent Nimbin reunion was a dancers, choreographers, artistic direct­ It's a pity the quality of Uieir repro­ Freud's work readily reveals the potential pretty dry affair by all accounts, but ors, administrators and policy-making duction is not good. for generalising the theories of repression with a lum-up as big as die original boards, as he sees Uiem, and giving an A few of the poems are set locally, from the psyche to the society, a finding festival, it showed that the counter­ insight into the problems of the Company hence having particular interest for that many psychologists, parliculariy al culture is still alive, if not quite as crazy which led to the tragic and damaging Brisbane readers, like the contrast be­ this University, should investigate. as in those frantic, tripped-out days of strike in 1981. tween the foresty' slopes of Mt Coot- 1973 when tlie Kuranda hippies were The essays on patriarchy that follow How cheated many ballet followers tha and the bulldozers and tmcks that being "dragged off the streets of Nimbin felt when, as a result of the strike, they noisily service the quarry. In 'Bancroft place feminism at the top of the agenda for going up to patrohitig police and say­ of any discussion of oppression. Yet the missed out on seeing'Tlie Merry Widow'. Park', Alison notes; ing "1 love you police so much that I However, this loss was minor when promise Connell makes to wrestle with want lo fuck you all". Eitoggera Ck the implications of feminism for men compared to the loss of half the Comp­ winds gracefully remains unfulfilled. That was the spirit of Nimbin; any's dancers which followed. tlini ashgrove, newmarket cosmic awareness and radical politics However, Lisner gives us a detached under the traffic snarled bridge While admittedly giving an up-to- grinding together to produce an extra- date account of theoretical developments look at the circumstances surrounding Brisbane has many peaceful waterways reality where anything was possible. That the strike, and proffers differing view­ that, unfortunately, are subjected to our in regards to relation between patriarchy was what the counter-culture needed - and capitalism, tlie four essays on sex points througli interviews with the waste, often destroying the birdlife. to have the space to set in train all the Company's founding artistic director. are, in my opinion, too dry, too abstract­ changes they wanted. The two poems that had the most ed. One interesting observation that Dame Peggy van Praagh, and the admin­ And while the results might look impact on mc were 'Medium Rare Done Connell makes, particularly relevant to istrator, Peter Bahen MBF, who was at lo a Turn' and 'A Belsen for Sheep'. sexism, is tltat repression is maintained, fairly minimal and, in die end, pessi­ Ihe centre of the dispute. mism abounds (the narrator has his dope These are higjily emotive pieces that not by a fact of nature, but by a project But definitely the higliliglit and convey the transportation and slaugliter of exploitation undertaken by those with stolen), the point is that it happened. strength of the book are the illustrations There was squabbling between the of livestock. She has likened die whole power. - 85 in all. The photographs of dancers process to the extermination of the Jews factions at Nimbin 1973, and busts, and scenes of performances are rich in In Section 2, Connell wades througli and guns,'and bad trips, and the toilets ('nuff to turn you into a vego). tlie muddy waters of class theory, fiom flavour, and lliose in colour (30) ofien Alison is a member of the G.G. Jung stank, but some people still had the capture splendour in motion. an analysis of historical theories of class innate good sense lo use Che space prov­ Society and this and Patrick White are and stratification, to a damning critique Certainly this most wonderful book her main infiuenccs. This book is appeal­ ided In order to challenge the way things must become a collector's item lo those of Aldiusser, whom he declares has to were, and to live as an aitform. ing and 1 recommend it, particularly to be ditched. who arc the least bit fond of ballet. STEPHEN STOCKWELL nature lovers. Part three is a rather haphazard col­ HARRY DUNSTALL JENNY MORTIMER lection of essays beginning with a hostile attack on the conservative ideology of liJllJiJIIJiJIIIIJIIJIIIJlJIiJillllllllllJlllltllllllllltllJIlllillllllilltlll llllllllllllllllllllllllllllllillililllllillllllllllllltlllilllllllillllllllll 'IllllllliiillilllllllllllllllillllilltlllJlllllillllillilllllliiilllillllllt 27 [RECOBPS

HIGH PLACES: Cathie O'Sullivan and dels PASSIONWORKS: Heart (CBS) have the same mass appeal the single is having on com­ Pierce. (EMI) Heart's latest album introduces a maturity into mercial radio. This album is definitely only for folk purists the group's material not evident before. The album comes across as a mixture of sharp fifties rock and roll and rockabilly. "Rant and Rave" is very The album is not as heavy as previous efforts, al­ and the most patriotic of Larrikin release easy listening and has the stamp of a well produced followers. though there are still the powerful drum beats and explosive guitar outbursts the band is noted for {'How (Dave Edmunds) and arranged album. It has only one If you liked O'Sullivan's debut album 'Artesian Can I Refuse'). disappointing song, and the track 'Rebels Rule' suffers Waters', released in 1980, then this will give you more of However, what is intriguing is tho variety of musical from censorship. the same. styles the group encompasses - from blues to romantic Hopefully the commercial success which this album The cover blurb claims Cathie O'Sullivan was influ­ rock ('Love Mistake') to straightforward love-songs already seems .assured of should prompt the Stray enced for this recording by her stay in the Kakadu ('Johnny Moon' and 'Heavy Heart'). The music could Cats to tour once again. Unfortunately we won't National Park, as a guest of the traditional owners, the hardly be described as stereotypical, a criticism valid be able to dance away on the Cloudland Ballroom Gagadju tribe. Only one track, 'Nipper/Big Bill', bears in regard to previous works. floor which made their last concert so memorable. any relationship to aboriginal culture, with a quite • The tide of the album is entirely appropriate, with DOMINIC CARROLL clumsy and unconvincing attempt to blend an aboriginal the two Wilson sisters getting emotion and pathos voice with the Celtic harp. into their writing — the Wilsons wrote the bulk of the Personally, I'm wary of the current Australian folk material on the album. trend to 'dabble' in a musical blend of two such diverse Added to this the superb vocal range of the Wilsons, cultures, with some token didgeridoo, or the use of a the album is not bad listening value. black voice. In this case, certainly, it just does not work, SIGHT AND SOUND: The New Models. HARRY DUNSTALL and makes the album's theme, and the cover photo­ I suppose technically, it Is hard to fault the graph, mere pretension. New Models 'Sight and Sound' E.P. Perhaps those who have a penchant for the Canadian The three piece band from Boston have put out a McGarrigal Sisters or the quavering of eariy Marianne tightiy produced and played debut effort. However, Faithful would find some charm in the track 'There's from a listener's point of view, it is hard to find anything Anguish', where Cathie does seem inspired by Dorothy to praise about the five tracks of 'Sight and Sound'. Hewitt's poetry. Otherwise, 'High Places' is strictiy ABC The key word that describes this E.P. is 'forgettable'. material. Cathie's derivative English-based folk, high Not one of the tracks can be recalled two minutes after falutin' voice, and Cleis Pierce's skilful, but unoriginal, it has finished. The songs are bland and the lyrics inane. electric viola should suit their Australian music prog­ The sound is pseudo-British trying to capture the Euro- ramming admirably. synthesiser sound of bands such as Orchestral Man­ LOUISE BUTT oeuvres, Japan and failing. This is obvious in songs such as "Listen" and "Looking for a Reason". I The highlight of the E.P. is "Say What" which, sur­ prisingly enough, is the only track which does not try to imitate other bands. It has the potential to be a great dance single, but it suffers from the same lack of energy which makes the ^.P., on the whole, mediocre and dull. If I had to categorise this E.P., I'd put it in the "music for Insomniac's" category and place it next to Val Doonican in my aunt's record collection. KIM HAMILTON

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EVERYWHERE AT ONCE: The Plimsouls IF I DIE, I DIE: Virgin Prunes (EM!) (Geffen Records) The cover gives a good indication of what to expect from most of 'If I Die, 1 Die'. Dark, The new Plimsouls LP is the first recording claustrophobic, dreamlike — pallid images effort by the American band for some time. drifting in and out of focus. Their eariier material, which includes an EP, circa It's not the first time the dark side of the subcon­ 1980, and a self-tided album some time after, remains scious has been the subject of modern music, but the fairiy unmemorable stuff. mood of this album is uniquely disturbing. Layers of The Plimsouls brand of wimpish 'pop' contained Celtic, tribal melody patterns; sharp percussive sounds; neither the charm of true 60's garage pop nor the energy repetitive, surreal imagery ('Take a dream and fly of late seventies new wave. There were some listenable away ...'), all add up to unsettling, but not inaccessible, tracks, but certainly nothing to write to NME about. listening. This new album, however, shows all the signs of a definite improvement. The Plimsouls have opted for a NO PARLE2: Paul Young (CBS) An album from which one might expect to wake change of producer, replacing Danny Holloway with Everyone who listens to commercial radio will up in a cold sweat. Jeff Eyrich, have heard the first single off the album, MATT MAWSON The result? A sound which has put a little more 'Where-ever I Lay My Hat' is arguably the most 'soul' into the 'Plims'. Eyrich has managed to capture chauvinistic song of the year, must also go down a more R&B influenced feeling to their material, best as one of the best and, as such, is typical of the represented by songs like 'Shake City' and the title album as a whole. track. They also manage a very credible cover of the RANT AND RAVE: Stray Cats (Festival) old standard 'Lie, Beg, Borrow and Steal', a move which The album displays a good deal of musical initiative The latest album from the Stray Cats has proved as evidenced by the variety of influences on the tracks; may indicate where their future stylistic intentions lie. Booker T. Jones, Marwn Gave and Steve Cropper (ex- to be their best yet. A more sympathetic emphasis on rhythm, along with Blues Brothers) all contribute, and Young does an excell­ After the initial success of "Runaway Boys", fol­ some West Coast psychedelia-influenced guitar effects, ent version of Joy Division's 'Love Will Tear Us Apart*. lowed by a disappointing second album, this record combine to create a more mature, credible sound on This makes for an album very well-balanced in music­ should recapture the solid following from "Runaway Everywhere at Once. al content, made even better by Young's strong voice. Boys", which was generated by excellent songs like In summary, the Plimsouls have come up with an Most songs are heavy on the romance (tor example, Stray Cat Strut, Fishnet Stockings and Wild Saxaphone. improved product, but in view of their earlier material, 'Love of the Common People'), although this is not a This album is highlighted by 'Look at that Cadillac' that's a subjective value judgement which will require criticism; and Young is not afraid to experiment, using and 'I won't stand In your way'. Slower songs which individual interpretation. Suffice to say the Plimsouls keyboards and synthesisers to good effect. give the Stray Cats time to show the sharpness and have not so much come up with the goods as shown the finish they've gained since starting out. Definitely one of the t>est albums of the year. potential to do so. 'Sexy and Seventeen' was a natural choice for the HARRY DUNSTALL JON BAIRO single, however 'Sonnething Wrong with My Radio' llllllillllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllltlllllllllllltlllllllllllllllllllH could have equalled the task. Perhaps it wouldn't 28 BECORDS

THf LIITLf HEROES

Uaiil ih, Uo-Jd Fire of Love

WATCH THE WORLD: Little Heroes EMI FIRE OF LOVE: The Gun Club (EMI) THE REAL MACAW: Graham Parker (EMI) Most people would remember the Little 4 ON THE FLOOR: The Magnetics (EMI) The Real Macaw is Parker's second album with­ Heroes for the moderately successful 1982 When punk music first faltered, it was supposed out the backing of the Rumour (Brinsley single, 'One Perfect Day'. to be rockabilly that would replace it in the Schwarz being the only survivor from that This album, 'Watch the World', represents a matur­ public imagination. band). ing of the Little Heroes from that promising beginning. It confirms him as a major creative force in his own This transition has t>een helped by producer, Rupert For the hordes of white kids who craved novelty and right, without having to compare him to the skeletons Hine. The tracks in general are more polished perfor­ stimulation, rockabilly meant roots music. It had started in his closet or his aspirations. mances than their earlier work. off at the same time as rock'n'rol' as the bastard child of country and blues. But, while rock'n'roll had become For better or worse, this record sees Parker's further The release blurb says that Roger Hart, lead singer increasingly refined, rockabilly had kept its raw edge. maturation. The pleasures of this album are subtier ones and song writer, is influenced bv the punk scene. For­ as the anger and desperation which provide a potent tunately, this influence doesn't manifest itself in the A reaction to the religious fundamentalism of Ameri­ base for so many of Parker's classic songs have subsided. music. ca's dead heart, it was as if rockabilly had achieved a musical fundamentalism of its own, an approach which With the exception of a couple of mediocre songs, Consequentiy. 'Watch the World' is quite a pleasant could not be further reduced or built on without sacri­ the lyrics on this record are emotionally charged, in­ album to listen to. ficing its very sou). sightful and honed. As always, Parker's voice is superb, However, the punk influence is evident in the theme and cuts through the sometimes too smooth product­ of the album. Hart has written the songs about dissillu- The impetus behind the rockabilly 'revival' came ion. No-one else could make the words of 'Sounds Like sionment with one's own worid, loneliness, and desire mainly from American bands like the Stray Cats, the Chains' sound so much like a manifesto; for a better existence. Cramps, and the Gun Club. The Stray Cats converted it Some of the lyrics are quite clever: into just another vehicle for expressing teenage rebellion, No-one can keep these ropes around me US-style, making a packet of money in the process. But Or take the blood out of my veins The white fluorescent light is struggling with the the Cramps and the Gun Club detected something much I'll pull the trigger back as the volume gets stronger foggy night ^ It sounds like chains. more potent in it. For them, rockabilly was an opport­ To show someone its needed in any situation that unity to delve into the heart of darkness, both America's While The Real Macaw took a few listens to apprec­ it shines in and their own. Inspired by the paranoia and fire and iate, it, like every other Graham Parker record, is worth to describe the details a person notices while they are brimstone rhetoric of middle America, they gave birth to the effort. waiting for someone. psychobilly, a slightiy deformed music form, it's true, JOHN CARROLL Three tracks, 'Modern Times', 'Painting Pictures'and but still the rightful heir to the more demented side of lllllllllillll the title track are quite good, the rest are not so spark­ punk. ling. Fire of Love is the Gun Club's first album. It first As a group, I think the Little Heroes have a littie saw the light of day two years ago, but only now has it more maturing to do. There is not much variety in style been released in Australia, presumably to capitalise on between tracks, and the album theme ir. a littie depress­ the band's recent tour, as well as on the enormous ing. But the group is well on its way to becoming a top success the Stray Cats have had in America, Aussie band. The song tities are a fair indication of what the I thought the album quite good, and suggest you have album is like - 'Sex Beat', 'She's Like Heroin to Me', a listen to it next time you're in a record shop. 'Fire Spirit', 'Black Train'. Images of sex, fire, drugs, CAMERON LAWRIE evil, fear, violence, death - they're all in there. An inverted tribute to America's Bible Belt ond the Moral Majority, the album makes for compelling, exhausting listening. My only reservation is that, unlike the Cramps or even the Birthday Parly, there is no sense of irony. The Gun Club are deadly serious. So serious that they'll probably die before they get old. Yet more coals for the fire that lights the romantic side of nastiness and evil I The Magnetics are an Australian band with a margin­ .^ ./" ally better sense of humour. They're responsible for a ( / ^ 'BoDJFs m SOULS

J~\ 1—I—«' I .e. w SOULS: Manhattan Transfer (WEA) Manhattan Transfer have always been something mmm^mm of an oddity in the music world. Early in their career they fashioned a style that owed just a little to jazz, rhythm'n'blues and funk, and ever since they have kept to it. The musical style is secondary, though, because it will be as a vocal group that Manhattan Transfer are remembered. Between them, the two male and two female members of the group vary between a dew-drop TROUBLE IN PARADISE: Renee Geyer wispiness and a more assertive rhythm'n'blues delivery. Renee Geyer is lucky. She has a good voice and At times they sing with a remarkable beauty, the rest of a reasonable following. Her greatest asset, how­ the time they outsing the great bulk of other vocalists. ever, is her management. Yet 'Souls' is far from being a satisfactory album. This time Renee has been put in yet another studio Manhattan Transfer have nothing to say, they aren't with some more great musicans and producers. The torn by any great passions, they have no soul. They sing for two reasons only - they are technically profic­ result is a 'good' record. Everything sounds right, yet it .slight dance tune called 'Sometimes Good Guys Don't ient and they seem to make enough money to keep their lacks that indefinable something that distinguishes a Always Wear White'. Ho ho! Produced by Vanda and record company happy. song and helps make it a hit. The vocals are good, with Young (ex-Easybeats), they sound something like a Ms Geyer displaying her distinctive 'white negro' sound. cross between early Dr Hook and even earlier AC/DC. Somebody from 'Rolling Stone' once suggested that It seems a shame that she is to be involved in yet Just when you thought you were safe from heavy Manhattan Transfer were purveyors of schmaltz. They another cynical marketing exercise. For years she has metal, they dust off all the old masters and mix the were probably right. 'Souls' benefits from state-of-the- been marketed as a pouting sex symbol, and has been rhythm section higher in the name of dance music. I art production, but ultimately it confirms that all that glitters is not gold. jumping from one musical bandwagon to another. mean, they have to be joking. Why don't they just let her sing? ^^^^ QASKEY IAN GRAY IAN GRAY llllllllliJIIIIIIJIIIIljjIllllljjIlillJjjilllliJllllllJIIJjJIIIIIlJJlllllllJllllitlJIIIIIN^ lllllllilllitlllllllttllliillliiillllllllllllllltlllllllllllllllllllllllllllllttllillllllllllllH lllllllllllllllllllltlllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllill^ 29 D •'S

aUBBNBLAND DBMOCFIACY BONO (P.

h Hi Iw McMtM U Mil M I Study this diagram carefully. kMsnaiaixxiiMxxx We were going to run a competition for the most Inventive explanation for In a move that would be more in exactly what was going on In it, but gency service card. However, after a character with the Premiers develop- since this is the last Issue of Semper Long weekends arc often a problem month more of travelling, the dog and mentat-ail-costs philosophy, the ALP for this year there doesn't seem to be for people with minimal imaginations. Benedict were reunited at a place around has begun to sell shares in the Queens­ much point. This is certainly true in Hampshire, 75 km from where the canoe sunk. land branch of the party. So, anticipation over, we can Joyfully England, where if the soccer and re-runs This is generally the sort of plot that announce that It's from the South Aust­ of 'Coronation Street' don't appeal, Is this the open form of a style of is restricted to 'Lassie' movies, where ralian Metropolitan Fire Services Journal, there isn't much else to do. political funding that we've always dog and man are tearfully reunited and and explains a system of breathing No doubt this very problem occurred suspected? Is it possible to get a majority the dog proceeds to lead the man to that may save lives during a fire in a to Benedict Allen, a local resident. He interest in the Queensland ALP? Has safety. Robert Holmes A Court made an offer? high rise building. was obsessed with the notion of being It is also around this time that the Mow much will Wigmore shares be worth Called the 'High-Rise Fire Snorkel', the first man to make a direct crossing same wanker who says "There is nothing after this? and designed by — who else — an Amer­ between die Amazon and Orinoko river deltas. new under the sun", will nod and say Sorry, it's nothing that Interesting. ican, It incorporates a mouthpiece, filter Obviously without seeing either 'Fitz- "A man's best friend is his dog". In reality, the shares are just a form of and tube. All those wishing to buy such carraldo' or 'Burden of Dreams', he Obviously so, as can be seen in Mr receipt for donations made towards a tube now so they can practice this lost began with a team of Indian guides who Allen's description of what happened the ALP election campaign fund, so art should form an orderly queue here... subsequently deserted him after only next: none of the above questions is relevant. a mo 1th of his trek. This left him alone "Eventually, after more days when However, maybe the CIA could be in the wilderness with only a dog that we looked as if we were going to die, fooled into buying some shares... had befriended him at one of the villages, 1 was forced to kill my dog for his vital for company. proteins." Just to make things better, soon after I'm sure Lassie would have wanted it his canoe sunk, taking with it his maps, that way. food, medicine, dog and RACQ emer­

Other than Volvo. Saab, Cuckoo clocks and theories about superior races, Swed­ en doesn't have a great deal to export.

Since ABBA went bankrupt, the Bob Hawke's attempts to associate The Semper prize for most inventive situation has become more critical, himself with the winners of every variety use of natural resources (if not necess­ forcing the nation to explore all avenues of sport known to humanity have roots arily ability), goes to two unemployed of export earning goods. back to when he was studying at Oxford men from Brisbane. With this in mind, it will come as University. The men hailed a cab at 12.30 am on only a mild surprise that Sweden is At that time he missed out on seeing a Monday. After a short ride in the making concerted efforts to corner the Roger Bannister tun the four minute mile taxi, one of the men put his arm around world penis market. Apparentiy Japan What does this sign mean? on May 6, 1954. During Bannister's the driver's neck and held what Police has placed an order, due to the claim It was recently proposed by the attempt, Bob had been playing (not described as a "pointed leaf" at the that the penises of Elks and Reindeer Sydney City Council for the walkways congratulating), as 12th man in an man's throat Fortunately the taxi are said to be aphrodisiacs). in the city, and is claimed by them Oxford cricket game. driver twigged (sorry) to what was While it would have been easy for to be 'clear and unambiguous'. When rain stopped play he returned going on and successfully fought back. the Swedes to treat the whole business The Sydney Morning Herald asked to the clubhouse for "a few beers", rather This sounds as likely as the Toowong has a bit of a joke, subsequent research the same question as we just did, and than walk die two kilometres to where National Party sign guard who was found the Japanese to be backed by a ran a competidon for what its readers Bannister was mnnlng. carrying a "big stick". Is this a resur­ reputable banking company. The order thought it was designed to depict. "It's of great regret to me that I didn't gence in vegetable armaments? Will the was for five tonnes - or between 1,500 One thought it was a sign prohibiting show more judgement on that occasion," slogan 'speak softly and carry a big and 2,000 penises. The numbers will getting pregnant in public, while more he said, at the launching on a book about stick' gain new relevance? vary depending upon the beast that civilised answers claimed it outlawed long distance runners attended by Robert Stay tuned. the penises are taken from. The Rein­ eating apples, crying after getting a De Castella. deer's memt)er, for instance, weighs parking ticket, lying dmnk in the gutter, It may go some way to explaining his V.Wa'.WWaU.'J^iViV five kilograms normally, and is bigger and being a french tennis player. recent behaviour. than the Elk's. So what does it really mean? The The entire issue raises the notion of Council provided this explanation with z Sweden being on the verge of a penis it: "Spitlum fouling footpath prevention Vi led recovery. I hope the Hawke cabinet measures'. Well, Uiat makes it clear, is reading this. doesn't it. u 3 .2 I i_i_U_iJ_M- M -WWJHKCK'WWW-i-H^www. a 0)

c •£ re s £ Vn s - the mir^imum size of iceberg re­ It's always easy at parties to pick which quired would be 0.1 cubic kilometres, people have read "How to make friends > - the' Antartic ice is capable of supp­ a and influence people". o lying an urban population of between o They casually stumble in at around c 2,500 and 6,000 million people. 0 9 o'clock, dressed in cardigans and faded a K-mart brand jeans, get a drink and then - to cross the equator, would require proceed with the intention of beginning wrapping the iceberg in a form of in­ (3 a conversation. sulated plastic which wouldn't be affected Next time you buy a Rolls Royce (a danger to the eyes of fellow employees. by the berg's lack of solidity or stability. They casually look into the ice at reasonably rare occurrence for TEAS Peter claimed that the 10cm spikes - because of its underwater mass, the bottom of their glasses and say, students), It Is a nlc^ feeling to know weren't dangerous. the bergs could come no closer than "You know, there's an awful lot of ipe that the people assembling diem don't "I mix with people all the time In 15 kilometres to the coastline, requiring in the Antartic", and then give the bored have pointy heads. crowded nightclubs, and I have never a pipeline that long to get the water. listener a rundown on the feasibility of Injured anyone," he said. "The only This totally relevant information em­ using ice from there to provide drinking Next time someone attaches them­ problem I have is when I'm sleeping; erged from an appeal against the wrong­ water for the world. selves to you at a party (which implies ful sacking of an employee from the I have to lie on my stomach." that you're the second least interesting The easiest way to destroy these Rolls Royce company. person present) and looks down at the people is to give the statistics to them, His appeal was turned down. We ice in their glass, quickly quote the Peter Montlboy was sacked because which have been provided by the Ant­ wonder If the hair had been In the shape above-mentioned statistics. It's likely his hair, which, has been formed Into arctic Treaty Consultative Meeting in of a winged keel, It would still have you'll never be bothered again. a xrles of spikes by the judicious use been deemed dangerous. Canberra a few weeks ago. of Industrial glues, was said to be a 30 In the rush of teaspoons, medallions, steins and sex aids that have come onto AMERICA'S CUP the market to cash in on the America's Cup win, few have seemed to have under­ OURS! stood why Australia actually won. The medallion reproduced here, as with most of the others offered, shows Australia II with a conventional keel. If they re serious about ripping people off they may as well get their facts right. ACTUAL 10 GRAM SIZE On that note, a boy who will no doubt look back on his parents and COMMEMORAt Wacko the diddlio, you may say. You do? Well, stop lying and Join the first is of Cleopatra mistaking an ass NEW RELEASE But the boy's parents saw fit to call vast minority of people who don't for an asp. The second shows Adam their child Lucas Charles Australia il Matthew Martin, whose contributions and Eve being tempted with an apple ti^cMtlelaiiidllnetJjyir John Bertrand Ben Lexcen Forbes. nhAadbywiKldrtiwmveii have been seen in the past few Sempers,by a servant Instead of a serpent, while Nice people. Englihird Inifiislrlu showed even more than his usual degree the third depicts Saint Patrick outdoing of ingenuity with this cartoon. Enoch Powell by ridding Ireland of Sometimes he may wonder why he Cobblers instead of Cobras. Ililllllllllllllll botliers, so, for those who haven't been Anyone buying S&W Olives from Cali­ I think the fornia will probably observe that the Tyrannosaurus, claimed size of die product is not dis­ similar to the National Party's claims about development progress in Queens­ land. A can of large olives seems impressive DO wumcERiiywmroB£mm>by Arnericans until die rest of the label is read. S&W

offer their product in the following \ OPPORTUNITY ^ Now li vour ch»nc» of • l.f««im« D.f» »o !>• sizes: large, pitted large, extra large, —-^Robbad Lit) m»k»» you ( lamarkabla o((»r tlirting pitted extra large, mammoth, giant, pitt­ ell with only ona pound par waak. wagMrantaa that wilhm TWO MONTKS you can hava tha whola o* ed giant, jumbo, pitted jumbo, collosal Thioughout \*i» *B*> Vtry Rich Man htv» dii your monay ramovad. r)o mallar which way you turn and super colossal. COvtrad ih« iKrat ol mikinn your monty thtiri NOW ih*>« Vary Rich M*n «r« prepared 10 impart Aside from wondering why it is (hi) t^iai III vuu JlK conftdanca VERY RICH MEN < impossible to obtain a pitted mammoth, we can only claim that it is the range Theiacratisquileiimpla But vary varyonpantiva Ail you hava lo do li tigrt a lagally bindmg contract Interested in dinosaurs? The Police are. of shirt sizes provided by some National which commilt you to nothing aicapl raguljr pay Anyone who can write lines like "Hey Party ministers. ants, and you ara on your way Throughout this there Mister Brontosaurus/have you got prahminary pariod wa shall piv you ragultr calls and send you mlormaliva laaflals and phonr you al a message for us/you are 50 storeys ighl and avan mova in with you anything to maka high/but you wouldn't hurt a fly/we ':i aura that you ara paying happily We shall sand you K: KZ a Passport to Poverty ai thii point in tha courta Ihat you will never believe possible * Even less worthy of a mention is the raaliia how Vary Rich Man maka thair monay discovery of a fossilised dinosaur egg Having raaliiad thii SECRET you hava now loit ••"••. your opponunily lo claim your money bach undar at - wait for it - Egg mountain, Montana. th» guarania* You hava laarnad tha SECRET ri i> CATCH<^ fi^, Laid about 70 million years ago, we now youri to lall to anybody alaa " < THE SECRET IS YOURS < \EI/ recite the fact here so that we can use Quiu •,gh

A fossil­ Don't eat it. j Ane^ttrp POAf'r I had ^ For only hall of everything you earn, plus a Amell ised Pont eat ii ordinarily toke me one ttits HMD^interes t in your house, your wife lile insurance and e/ir pension scheme, we will help you get your money We shall show you how (/i«y cart be paying oil dinosaur for a monViti^. back Irom the people ne»l door entirely FREE OF rare your debts while AT THE SAME TIME aincarely /r/ CHARGE fool? It" wusoff tMCOming poor With our aid you will be able to find. promise them THE WORLD, secure m Ihe knowledge Ihat within two months wa shall mixiaiiiy iMva you ^OH CONGRATULATIONS! < on youT own again with nocturne) unrest f BARGAIN < irate neighbours civil war in your area bankruptcy hearings no money Although vo'i aia ttill laqully entitled' to buy these espeniiva lingalion no friends AND the Vary Rich Man's Secret of Happiness book..I BARGAIN PRICES Do you Sincerely Went to be yWRITE NOW FOR DETAILS TO: Bankrupt? Do you Sincerely Went to Commit DARE TO BE ROBBED LTD Very Rich Man's Secrets Suicide? Oepartmeni 4 USA Do you Sincerely Want to be Buried (Telegrams a U L S H.I T ) Cheaply? .obhgtl/

s Yas I'm iniaiaiiwi I nt faiiti«\(.caiit I Tick i*<)u.iad bo> j 'Jesus Christ Fly-gwattin^ without a newspaper I -Yes yes I m eniamaly interested interested I 'Oh boy. am I inlarastad No I am a Lawyer Coodlcvemt\4„. 1 ..here is the news

Queensland can lay claim to knowledge STARCROSSED SOLUTION on a number of issues. We know more about gerrymanders, mudslinging, how many babies Joh kisses, and how he ^oc K B^ 1 fi <^ S managed to play squash despite his i El B n B piles . . . oi popularity, than any other s T\A\P\A A/ MR\F u\k\A State. The topic of how best to hit a fly is as Fascinating, no doubt, for Leukaemia But one thing that we know nothing m; a Ei m- m good a topic as any to take up when you sufferers. about is snakes. An exhibition of dead M H ^(^lAm £ ^•D AlTfl can't find a ciire for cancer. Unfortunately for Doctor Gray, he snakes at this university showed that was upstaged by Dr Margaret Heidrick tm r^n m m n So It must have been for the National only 19 percent could correctly identify UIAIVI p • PiR Institute for Medical Research in Britain. of the University of Nebraska, who all the Australian snakes displayed. m 0 BE A Dr Gray has discovered that the best discovered that mice who were fed m a a n msi way to beat the fly's all round vision and sulphur pills lived 13% longer lives dian Worse still, only four percent could C 0 MIMIU V I CIA r 0 (?• 1/1000 of a second reflexes, was to have normal. Although paltry excuses like identify a python, and only 25 percent a co-ordinated double swipe. the drug's (2-Mercaptoemethamol) ab­ of doctors and medical students could ra m n n ility to reduce the damage oxygen does "Hit it with boUi hands, not just one," do so. ^ E9 i m to animal cells, we firmly believe the he advises, "The simultaneous approach­ Considering Queensland's excellent Bo H\ES^ mice's longevity is due more to the VUL]CJAA^ ing swats render the fly immobile because knowledge of other matters, such as pungent odour produced, that would it cannot compute at which angle to take Jack Newton jokes, this shows an inter­ deter all but Italian cats. off." esting arrangement of State priorities. 31 Published by Alien and Unwin. $4.95 Some years ago, the Women's Weekly used to publish a list of babies' names and their meanings as a guide for thousands of expectant parents. At best, the list v/as misleading. 'Azaria' lost its place after 1980 (it meant 'Good with Animals', incidentally), and names like 'Andrew' were claimed to mean 'Gifted with Language', when everyone knew it actually meant 'Back­ bone of Asparagus'. Patrick Cook has rectified the problem with his new book. Parents can now name their offspring with complete confidence. David, for instance, is from the Hebrew 'Devo', meaning 'No Sheep is Safe', and is a good name for either an aimless second son or a large intelligent dog. This book is full of such explanations. Azaria stilt doesn't rate a mention, but now that I know the real meanings of my name, I'm never going to forgive my parents. PATRICK DAMIEN MICK BRENDAN O'SHATTERY SIMPSON Now here's a splendid choice. From the Latin 'noble', the Greek 'wonderful', Ancient Persian 'fabulous', French 'sensational', German 'exemplary', Anglo- Indian 'most gracious' and the Celtic 'a great fine strong handsome broth of a boy'. An almost unearthy beauty, pardcularly in motion, is usually coupled wiUi a rare intelligence, like a swivel-headed laser in a nau^ty worid. A firm hand­ shake, clean shoes and a delightful social personality marred only by a tendency to wander off into other rooms in mid-sentence. St Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland, was less successful in cleaning out real estate, but is working on Ameri­ can tourists, ' •, ; ' •' • . '' • :

BARRY .:•/-.•;. v.- Although many people will freely admit to having met or married a Bany <^'' borrowed one to help lift heavy sofas, no one has eiieountered a jhlldBany.' The3rspringr^lly-fomied,-M-iciil estate agsrtts or theatre managefsTJBften'tab^ ulously wealthy and always pathetic. It;was-hbtUlwayssoz-TheTegendary Irish hero Burroughna Burroiigh, you will recall, oriife stole a golden bliiycfe^^ the paiit Mick O'Reilly. When cornered by thCg^aht.BunoujJf the cleverest riddle that everN.there was-'to cheat the* hiiV^fooI'bfhis.property' but Mick had no time for this foolbhness and kicked him sehseless. Biirrbugh' na Burrough's failure is still related to chUdren as aiiVexampleo^t beinga smart arse.,- .•• •-:>, ^'' \''i,y^:''-;,:r-'''--^''^^^''-'^'^^-'^''-'''^'--'-- - • ^•••••-•• ••-' r.4,J

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"HELEN • ^- ....•-^..• From the AnclentGr^ek nieahing •yain'andtheandentTrojmmeaning^allbait;. Heleiis tend td'pftrpetuate the myth of the'Wtraorlin^^^^^ .;• Ancient Histoiy;to,-a grinding KaltiM - •'• -• •'- -Lfi.:: • J'--.t:''ZJ'..ili'.'.l .'.'~tl;';i;;''iAAU''lii^J.— U^iaMii arAv^crnAtatarl uiil'fl artini-ialli/