WEEKLY BRING BACK Candle-lighting/Shabbos ends Friday, June 27: 8:12/9:21 OUR BOYS Vol. III No. 18 (#67) June 26, 2014 • 28 Sivan 5774 Free Lakewood Rabbanim Visit Community Unites New York City Offi cials Queens On Behalf Of At Prayer Gathering For Stand In Solidarity With Beth Medrash Govoha Kidnapped Boys In Israel Israel After Kidnapping Of Three Jewish Teenagers

SEE STORY ON P. 55 SEE PHOTOS ON 36/37; ARTICLE ON P. 52 SEE STORY ON P. 39

Shabbos Inbox Blue And White Op-Ed Politics And Ethics Hooked On Healing (D)Anger Tragedy Helplessness Situational To Give

Management Brings Unity By Betsalel Steinhart Awareness Or Not To Give Is Derech Eretz By Eytan Kobre By Shmuel Sackett hat can we do in the By Caroline Schumsky face of helplessness? By Abe Fuchs o goes the well-known hy do we do this to W This question is ooo… You want to give joke: ourselves? Why do being asked so many times, somehow, some way. S Husband to Wife: Wwe fi ght like dogs and over the last few days, as our and another person were SYou want to dedicate When I get mad at you, you cats until tragedy strikes? Why darkest fears take shape, as waiting on line at a bank the or allocate, but not so sure never fi ght back. How do you does it take the kidnapping of three boys sit who-knows- Iother day when there was how or where or how often? control your anger? three precious boys to bring us where, as three families lie only one teller available. The Well, let’s just jump right Wife: I clean the toilet bowl. together? It tears my heart that devastated, and as the entire customer at that window was into it, shall we?

CONTINUED ON P. 11 CONTINUED ON P. 25 CONTINUED ON P. 24 CONTINUED ON P. 27 CONTINUED ON P. 26

See Page 17 Fascinating 5 5 Lucrative Ideas Sold

See ad on p. 30 For Almost Nothing 2 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 3 4 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 5 6 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 7 PUBLISHED BY Queens Jewish Link, LLC RABBINIC CONSULTANT Forecast Rabbi Yoel Schonfeld MANAGING EDITOR 147-24 Naftali Szrolovits 69th Road SENIOR CONSULTANTS Flushing, Eliezer Szrolovits New York 11367 Yaniv Meirov [email protected] Cynthia Zalisky 917.549.6145 Helen Hoffman FRI • JUNE 27 Jennifer Jaffe www.QueensJewishLink.com

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8 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Stories Of Greatness R’ Dovid Hoffman A Difference In Thoughts

n Eastern Europe, close to one tained, from a pupil’s earliest years hundred years ago, most of the of Talmud study, the emphasis had Ielite yeshivos were situated in always been on a clear understanding Lithuania. Rav Meir Shapiro zt”l, the and retention of the textual materi- Lubliner Rav and a Jewish delegate al, and hence, not enough time could to the Polish Parliament (Sejm), had be spent on attention to profundity a dream of creating a yeshivah of re- in the study and comprehension in nown in Poland, to rival and even ex- depth. This, said Rav Meir, was the ceed the Lithuanian prototype. But historical reason for the formation before doing so, he felt the need to and development of what came to be travel to Lithuania and meet with known as Polish pilpul. many of the venerable roshei yeshiv- In general, the Lubliner Rav ah there to talk the matter through brought back with him a very favor- with them. With thoughtful consul- able impression of Talmud study in tation and wise counsel, he believed Lithuania, with its characteristics of he would fi nd the right way of study strong discipline, persistent, assidu- to implant in his yeshivah, Yeshivas ous study, and an essential inner love Chachmei Lublin. of the Torah for its own sake. In its own way, Rav Meir’s jour- One day, though, he was asked to de- ney throughout the yeshivah world tail the basic characteristic differences proved to be a triumphal procession in the ways of study between Poland for the great rav. At every destination, and Lithuania. Can the Rav defi ne and he was welcomed with the utmost pinpoint the deviations between a Pol- enthusiasm, even by the character- ish scholar and a Lithuanian scholar. istically less expressive Lithuanians. “Of course,” he replied with his charis-

“Why have you suddenly become so thoughtful?”

There were those who initially had matic twinkle and facetious wit. “It’s various doubts and misgivings, ques- quite similar to the basic differences tions and misconceptions, about the that exist between a chasid and a mis- grandiose scope of his projected ye- naged (one who rejects the chasidic shivah, but after they met him, they style). Let me explain what I mean accepted it – and his dynamic person- with an illustrative example. ality – wholeheartedly. “One day a chasid and a misnaged He started in Radin, with the were sitting together and studying holy Chofetz Chaim zt”l, and from a portion of Maseches Sukkah, and there he traveled on to Baranovitch, they duly came to the well-known Mir, Kletzk, and Slabodka. It was a account: It is told about the holy fulfi lling trip and Rav Meir learned Tanna, Rav Yonasan ben Uziel, that a great deal, as well as imparted a when he would sit and become deep- fl avor of Polish chasidic Jewry. All ly involved in his Torah study, any who met him were impressed with bird that fl ew over his head would be his profound Torah knowledge and burned up immediately. charisma. When he was fi nished, he “At that, the study partners fell si- returned home and gave a historical lent, each lost in thought. After a mo- survey of the formation of the two ment or two, the misnaged turned to groups of yeshivos in the two lands: his friend, the chasid, and asked, ‘Tell Poland and Lithuania. me, what are you thinking about? He described the substantive differ- Why have you suddenly become so ences between the two, and showed thoughtful?’ how variations in their lifestyles had “Replied the chasid, ‘I was just med- arisen out of the differences in the itating about the extraordinary, para- conditions of life between Poland and Lithuania. In Poland, he main- CONTINUED ON P. 28

Rabbi Dovid Hoffman is the author of the popular “Torah Tavlin” book series, fi lled with stories, wit and hundreds of divrei Torah, including the brand new “Torah Tavlin Yamim Noraim” in stores everywhere. You’ll love this popular series. Also look for his book, “Heroes of Spirit,” containing one hundred fascinating stories on the Holocaust. They are fantastic gifts, available in all Judaica bookstores and online at http://israel- bookshoppublications.com. To receive Rabbi Hoffman’s weekly “Torah Tavlin” sheet on the parsha, e-mail [email protected]

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 9 10 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Shabbos Inbox Eytan Kobre (D)Anger Management

CONTINUED FROM P. 1 in the desert without water (BaMidbar 20:2-11 and Rashbam ad loc.). Indeed, Husband: How does that help? this is one of three instances in which Wife: I use your toothbrush. Moshe “erred” (if we could even sug- I’ve always wondered whether gest such a thing) because he had got- the joke was only on the husband or ten angry (Sifrei, Matos 157). also on the wife. Sure, the husband On three other occasions, Moshe was unknowingly using a dirty tooth- got angry and forgot fundamental brush, but who would want to live Torah laws as a result (VaYikra Rabah with a spouse who brushed his teeth 13:1; see Sh’mos 16:20; BaMidbar 31:14; with toilet water? Hasn’t the wife VaYikra 10:16). Moshe’s inability to re- the well-known midrash that the ings of anger and acts magnanimous- done herself a disservice too? call specifi c Torah portions was not a plague began with one enormous frog ly, he is forgiven for his transgressions But that is the nature of anger. punishment for getting angry; it was which spewed many smaller frogs as (Yoma 23b). Hashem loves three kinds Anger causes irrationality. Imagine merely the natural consequence of his the Egyptians hit it, the Steipler asks of people, one of whom is the person trying to open your front door but anger. the obvious: Why would they con- who does not get angry (P’sachim 113b). the key won’t turn. You begin to get That’s why “anger can cause a sage tinue to hit the frog if it reacted by R’ Mordechai of Nashchiz very frustrated and try to force the key to to lose his wisdom, or a person who spewing more frogs? Shouldn’t they much desired a pair of tzitzis from turn, jamming the key inside. A per- is destined for greatness to forfeit it” stop? Logic dictated that they stop Eretz Yisrael, and his followers thus son acting rationally would realize (P’sachim 66b; Rambam, Dei’os 2:3). hitting the big frog. But logic wasn’t went to great lengths to procure all that the key must be the wrong one. Likewise, the angry person “forgets his in control; anger was. As a result, the the necessary materials from the Holy Continuing to force the key is illogical learning and increases foolishness” big frog spewed more and more little Land. One disciple was given the and counter-productive. (N’darim 22b). These aren’t punish- frogs, much to Egypt’s great detriment. great honor of preparing the tzitzis by While explanations abound as to ments as much as they are the natural There is no shortage of praise for cutting the neck hole and tying and why Moshe produced water for the consequences fl owing from our own those able to overcome feelings of Jewish people by hitting the rock rath- self-destructive behavior. anger. “When one overcomes his feel- CONTINUED ON P. 12 er than talking to it, some say it is be- The Steipler Gaon famously makes cause Moshe was angry at the Jewish this same point in connection with Eytan Kobre is a lecturer, writer, and attorney, residing in Kew Gardens Hills with his people for complaining that they were the plague of frogs in Egypt. Citing wife and children. He can be contacted at [email protected].

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 11 running out of the bathhouse. get you angry, and I lost 400 feel anything; rather, be in the (D)Anger Management “Why do people from Tarmud zuz because of you.” middle. Don’t become angry have round eyes?” the man “Well, it is better that you except over a serious matter…” CONTINUED FROM P. 11 very upset and the Vorke Reb- asked. Hillel calmly respond- lose 400 zuz, than for Hillel (Rambam, Dei’os 1:4). Similarly, be determined that he needed ed, “Because they live in san- (i.e., me) to get angry.” Rabbi Zelig Pliskin points out attaching its strings. In his to rebuke her harshly. “To get dy areas and the round shape Of course, anger is destruc- that “anger can signal us that great zeal to serve his rebbe, into my angry persona, I need prevents sand from getting in tive. The life of an angry per- an injustice is being commit- however, the disciple folded to don a different kapota.” It their eyes.” son is not truly a life (P’sa- ted and motivate us to speak the cloth twice and his cuts was only after changing into A short while later the man chim 113b). “One who tears up and take action to right therefore produced not one, his “angry clothing” that the again called out to Hillel. his clothing or breaks his the wrong” (Anger: The Inner but two holes. He shook with Vorke Rebbe proceeded to re- “Yes, my son, how can I help vessels or scatters his money Teacher, ArtScroll). fear at the thought of what buke her. you?” The man asked, “Why in anger is comparable to an So how does one distin- his rebbe would say when he Hillel too was able to con- do Africans have wide feet?” idolater” (Shabbos 105b; Avos guish between anger that is learned that his precious pair quer anger. Once, two men Hillel replied, “Because they D’Rabbi Nasan 3:2; see Ram- acceptable and anger that is of tzitzis was ruined. made a wager of 400 zuz to walk through the mud and it bam, Dei’os 2:3). “All who get not? Shortly thereafter, R’ Mor- see if they could anger Hil- makes it easier to travel.” angry, all forms of hell rule The Ramban’s advice is to dechai encountered this fol- lel (Shabbos 31a). Well, one This was like trying to him” (N’darim 22a). A person’s “habituate yourself always to lower and asked about the Friday afternoon – which ev- make a guard at Buckingham propinquity to anger is a tell- speak all of your words in a progress on the tzitzis. The eryone knows is a particular- Palace crack a smile, so the tale characteristic (Eiruvin low voice to all people and at man trembled and was hardly ly stressful time – one of the man fi nally gave up. “I have 65b). “An angry person is left all times” (Igeres HaRamban). able to blurt out what he had men called Hillel out of the many other questions, but I only with anger” (Kiddushin Others advocate the repeti- done. bathhouse. Hillel asked, “Yes, am afraid to make you angry,” 41a; see also Beis Yosef, Orach tion of our teachings about R’ Mordechai smiled. “Why my son, how can I help you?” the man said. Chayim 299). Or as Ralph Wal- the ill-effects of anger, or the are you afraid, my good man? The man asked, “Why are “Please, my son, ask all you do Emerson would say, “For self-imposition of fi nes for My tzitzis needs two holes: the heads of the Babylonians want.” every minute you remain an- each time a person becomes one to put my head through, round?” “Because their mid- Now the man could hard- gry, you give up sixty seconds angry (Pele Yo’eitz, Anger). and the other to test wheth- wives are not so well versed in ly contain himself. “There of peace of mind.” Procrastination also er Mordechai will lose his delivering babies,” answered should not be many more Anger surely is a most con- might help. “Be slow to an- head…” Hillel, and he returned to the people like you in Israel,” he demned trait. But that doesn’t ger and easy to pacify” (Avos It is said that R’ Yitzchak of bathhouse. blurted out. mean that anger has absolute- 5:14). The mishnah does not Vorke almost never got angry. A bit later, the man again “Why is that?” asked Hillel. ly no place in the spectrum of say, “Don’t get angry”; it says Once, a woman made him called out to Hillel, who came “Because I bet that I could valid human emotions. “One “Be slow to anger.” Eradicat- should make the good inclina- ing anger may be unrealistic tion angry at the evil inclina- for most. But working to be- tion” (B’rachos 5a). Even Hash- come “slow to anger”? That’s em gets angry – albeit only doable. As one Roman states- for one instant every day and man put it, “the greatest rem- even then He remains merci- edy for anger is delay.” ful (Sanhedrin 105a; B’rachos Indeed, the Rozdoler Rebbe 7a; P’sachim 87b). And while was wont to remind himself, the Rambam does caution that “When I feel angry at a per- “anger is a most bad trait, and a son, I should delay the expres- person should go to extremes sion of my anger. I should say in not becoming angry” (Ram- to myself: ‘What will I lose if I bam, Dei’os 2:3), he also rec- postpone my anger?’” ognizes that “one should not Perhaps anger delayed is be like a corpse that doesn’t anger denied.

12 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 13 A Shabbat Thought R’ David Algaze Faith And The Unknowable “This is the decree (hukkah) of the Torah, law of the red heifer, we may not compre- declare our subjugating our will to His. Torah wishes to counter by giving us laws which G-d commanded saying: Speak to the hend any of the other laws of the Torah. However, Rashi offers us a glimpse that we do not understand such as the law of children of Israel and they shall take to you Why would the Lawgiver create laws that a profound intellectual divide separates the Parah Adumah. a completely red cow, without blemish…” Man may not comprehend? Are the laws the faith of Israel from the other nations. This conceit and overconfi dence inher- (BaMidbar 19:2) irrational, lacking any meaning except the The nations represent the philosophy that ent in Man’s belief that he may understand fact that G-d commanded them? the only acceptable truths are those that everything is most evident in Western civ- he law of the red heifer contains a ilization and its source in Greek science basic contradiction. Its function and philosophy. The Greeks advanced Tis to purify the impure and yet the The arrogance of the nations scientifi c research by their curiosity in preparer of this solution becomes himself understanding physical phenomena and impure by touching it. How could the is precisely what the Torah wishes to counter chart their development and causation. power to purify and its opposite, the pow- by giving us laws we do not understand However, the driving force behind this er to defi le, coexist in the same essence? research was the belief that the human Thus, Rabbi Yochanan ben Zakkai ex- mind could understand everything, that plained this paradox to his students: “Nei- Rashi explains this verse as a debate can be explained by our reason, and eve- there was no mystery that human reason ther the corpse defi les nor the heifer or its between Israel and the nations. “Because rything outside of our logic is false. They could not unlock. waters purify. Rather G-d said, ‘I made a Satan and the nations of the world tor- believe that they should be able to grasp This philosophy, represented by the decree (hukkah) and you are not allowed ment the Jewish People by saying, ‘What the logic behind any concept, and there- philosopher Gottfried Leibniz, was called to transgress my order.’” (Tanhuma) is this mitzvah of Parah Adumah? What fore demand the reason for the mitzvah. the theory of “suffi cient reason,” name- This law has become the paradigm of all is the reason for it?” Therefore, the Torah They are unwilling to subjugate their in- ly that everything happens for a reason. the commandments. The Rabbis explain writes, ‘This is the hukkah of the Torah.’ It tellect to their Creator, while the Jewish Modern science has begun to question thus the sentence that introduces the law is My decree and you are not permitted to people affi rm a faith that is radically dif- this fundamental principle of Western of the red heifer: “This is the law (hukkah) comprehend it.” ferent from this philosophy. This arro- of the Torah” – rather than “This is the law There are some who would explain this gance of the nations is precisely what the CONTINUED ON P. 44 of the heifer” – to mean that the law of phenomenon as educating us into being the red heifer contains all the principles obedient of the Supreme King. By simply Rabbi David Algaze is the founder and Rav of Havurat Yisrael, Forest Hills. He is a of every other commandment in the To- following His commandments without noted public speaker and author and is the President of the international Committee rah. Just as one may not understand the our seeking the reasons behind them, we for the Land of Israel.

14 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 15 The Shmuz On The Parshah R’ Benzion Shafier

Earning A Living Doesn’t Have To Be Diffi cult

“And Hashem said to Moshe and desert, speak to the rock, and bring the Rashi tells us that because of this Rashi seems to be saying that if Moshe Aharon, ‘Because you did not believe in Me water back. When Moshe and Aharon mistake, the Jewish people lost out on had spoken to the rock, the Jewish Peo- to sanctify Me in the eyes of the children went to the rock, they spoke to it and a great lesson. Had Moshe only spoken ple would have increased their level of of Israel, therefore, you will not bring this received no response. Moshe then as- to the rock, the Jews would have said service to Hashem. They would have congregation to the land that I have given sumed that just as it was necessary to hit to themselves, “A rock doesn’t require realized that their livelihood was depen- them.’” dent upon their doing mitzvos, and this — BaMidbar 20:12 would have added focus and precision in While people may have many lofty motives, the way that they fulfi lled them. The B’eir Disappeared When Miriam Died one of our strongest drives is self-preservation Reward For Mitzvos For almost forty years while the Jews Isn’t In This World were traveling in the desert, their source There are two problems with under- of water was the b’eir, a large rock that the rock when the Jews fi rst went out sustenance, yet it listens to the word of standing this Rashi. One is that the Ge- provided the water they needed to sur- into the desert, so too now. When he hit Hashem; surely, we, who rely on Hashem mara tells us that the reward for mitz- vive. The Jewish nation then consisted the rock, it began pouring forth water. for parnasah, must listen to Him.” How- vos is not in this world. While it is true of about three million people. They Later, Hashem told Moshe and Aaron ever, since Moshe hit the rock instead of had also taken many animals with them that they had erred. Hashem told them speaking to it, that lesson was lost. CONTINUED ON P. 25 when they went out of Mitzrayim, so to speak to the rock, and it was through they required millions of gallons of wa- the power of speech that the miracle was Born and bred in Kew Gardens Hills, R’ Benzion Shafier joined the Choftez Chaim ter each day. The b’eir provided all they to come about. On some level, they were Yeshiva after high school. Shortly thereafter he got married and moved with his new needed and more. lacking in their trust in Hashem, and this family to Rochester, where he remained in for 12 years. R’ Shafi er then moved to Mon- When Miriam died, the rock disap- caused them to miscalculate. Had they sey, NY, where he was a Rebbe in the new Chofetz Chaim branch there for three years. peared, and klal Yisrael recognized that been more complete in their trust, they Upon the Rosh Yeshiva’s request, he stopped teaching to devote his time to running their survival was in jeopardy. Hashem would have used words alone, and the Tiferes Bnei Torah. R” Shafi er, a happily married father of six children, currently re- told Moshe Rabbeinu to go out into the rock would have provided the water. sides in Monsey.

16 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Fascinating 5 5 Lucrative Ideas Sold For Almost Nothing 1 The Raven turn powdered gelatin into The Raven by Ed- a tasty and commercially 5 The Red Vineyard gar Allen Poe tells the viable product when mixed The Red Vineyard story of a man who with fruit-based syrups. The is an oil painting cre- is visited by the titu- product was indeed tasty, at ated by Vincent van lar bird, which is the 88 percent sugar, and they Gogh in November manifestation of the named it “Jell-O,” a portman- 1888. It shows a group grief he suffers over a teau of “jelly” combined of harvesters working lost loved one. After with the era’s trend of end- diligently under the fi rst being rejected by ing a product name with luminosity of the sun. his friend’s magazine, an “-O.” They bought the This painting has the Poe sold the poem to long-unused patent for pow- distinction of being The American Review, dered gelatin from Peter the only piece of work Van Gogh sold in his lifetime. It who published it in Cooper, who invented was bought by fellow painter Anna Boch at an art exhibit their February 1845 the fi rst American in Belgium in 1890. She paid 400 francs for it (approxi- issue. He received $9 steam locomo- mately $1600 USD in today’s money). for it. tive, and went Much like Poe, Van Gogh lived and died tragically. He The poem garnered into business. didn’t earn the acclaim he deserved until many years af- instant acclaim and The Waits ter his death, but that acclaim translated into millions notoriety. It was re- were syrup ex- of dollars for those who owned his work. His paintings printed in periodicals perts but not are among the most valuable of any artist in history, all across the country and made Poe a household marketers, so with many selling for upward of $50 million. His most name. Today, The Raven stands as one of the most after years of expensive painting, Portrait of Dr. Gachet, sold for a re- famous poems in the history of the written word. unsuccessfully cord-breaking $82.5 million in 1990 ($150 million in to- The amount of money it has generated from reprints, trying to com- day’s money). books, and even movies is incalculable, yet Poe was mercialize Jell-O, The Red Vineyard was sold by Boch for 10,000 francs impoverished all his life and died nearly penniless. they sold the full rights to their neighbor Frank – 25 times what she paid – in 1906. The painting even- It is estimated that his lifetime earnings from profes- Woodward for $450 in 1899. Under the wing of an tually ended up in the Pushkin Museum in Moscow. If sional writing was just $6,200, whereas one copy of accomplished businessman like Woodward and bol- it was available for sale, it’s possible that the previous his fi rst book of poems sold for $662,500 in 2009. stered by an ingenious advertising campaign, Jell-O’s price record for a Van Gogh painting might be broken. annual sales quickly rose to $250,000, reaching $1 mil- lion in 1906. In 2013, Jell-O sales amounted to nearly 2 Safety Pins $500 million. Bonus: The Call Walter Hunt was a New York City mechanic Of The Wild and prolifi c inventor. He 4 Coca-Cola Heavily inspired by his time held patents for a foun- Pharmacist John Pemberton as a prospector in the Klond- tain pen, knife sharpener, created the fi rst formula for Co- ike, Jack London penned The rifl e, streetcar bell, stove, ca-Cola in 1886. The drink – then Call of the Wild, a story about ice plow, sewing machine, marketed as a brain and nerve a dog that is kidnapped from street-sweeping machine, tonic – began selling at a soda his suburban California home and nail-making machine, fountain in an Atlanta pharma- and made to drive a sled in among many others. cy that May. It cost fi ve cents the Yukon wilderness during the gold rush. It was fi rst per glass and earned only $50 in published in January 1903 as a serial in four issues of The its fi rst year on the market. Saturday Evening Post, which paid London $750 for the Desperate for money, thanks in part to a crippling nonexclusive rights. Later that year, London sold the illness and morphine addiction, Pemberton sold his full rights to Macmillan Publishers for $2,000 to turn ownership of the drink to other investors for $1,484, the story into a book. It was a substantial sum at the most of which was an interest-free loan to be paid time, one that many writers could only fantasize about. back with future profi ts. Those investors in turn sold The novel was released on July 1, 1903, for $1.50, selling their shares to shrewd businessman Asa Candler. 10,000 copies on its fi rst day. For $2,300, Candler became sole owner of Coca-Co- The book quickly became a classic, forever etched la and the newly formed eponymous company. In into the fabric of American culture, and made London To pay off a $15 debt to his friend, Hunt decided to 1888, just months after selling his shares, Pemberton one of the most well-known authors in history. By 1914, invent something useful that he could quickly turn a died from stomach cancer. Candler ended up selling 500,000 copies had been sold in the US, and by 1964, that profi t on. One day, while fi ddling with a 20-centime- his shares in 1919 – for $25 million, which is $341 mil- fi gure was six million. It sold millions overseas as well ter piece of brass wire, it came to him. His idea was lion in today’s money. and has been translated into 48 languages. The novel the safety pin – the fi rst pin to have spring action and has remained popular to a clasp to protect the fi ngers. this day. In the 100-plus Hunt fi led the patent on April 10, 1849, which he years since its publication, later sold to W.R. Grace and Company for $400. With it has never gone out of that, he paid off his friend, keeping the remaining print. Having sold away his $385 for himself. W.R. Grace and Company made mil- royalty rights, however, nei- lions off of the safety pin, as Hunt would have if he ther London nor his descen- had kept a share of the rights. dants ever saw a penny. He didn’t regret his decision, though – without Macmil- 3 Jell-O lan’s enormous promotion- In 1895, struggling cough syrup manufacturers Pearl al push, his career might and May Wait of Leroy, New York, devised a formula to never have taken off at all.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 17 18 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Snippets Of Strange

Ghost Or No? Photo Of 1-Minute surprise and attention, but was surprised by just how much feedback he’s getting. Check Out Spooky Parking Sign Typo “It’s interesting. There’s two sides: There’s the gamers side, who feel like Alcatraz Photo Goes Viral they’ve been vindicated or liberated,” he lcatraz is haunted. Here’s proof. said. “Then there’s the hardcore athletes A British couple say they’ve side, who say, ‘What do you mean? That’s Ataken a photo of what appears not a sport.’” to be a ghost inside an Alcatraz cell Melcher said League of Legends is a while visiting the famed San Francisco competitive game that demands team tourist attraction in April. strategy and mental prowess, and spend- Tourist Sheila Sillery-Walsh snapped of two new ventures that will launch ing money to recruit the best will deliver a shot of a cell using her iPhone -- and commercial space fl ights beginning in the types of committed students who in the frame is what she calls a “dark fe- 2015. are drawn by scholarships for traditional male fi gure.” Needless to say, it’s quite a bargain. sports. The school is even hiring a coach She says she felt a feeling of fear and A standard ticket aboard the maiden for its team. foreboding as soon as she stepped onto XCOR fl ight costs between $95,000 Starting this fall, the scholarships will the island. During the audio tour, she and $100,000. The winning donor will cover up to 50 percent of tuition and 50 photographed the visitation block, she take part in training exercises and med- percent of room and board. That’s worth said. very city has its share of ridicu- ical screenings before the actual fl ight up to $19,000 per student. The Universi- When she looked at the photo, she lous parking signs. takes place and will then take part in ty says it is among the fi rst in the nation saw what she now says is a ghost. E But a 1-minute parking sign one of the fi rst fl ights, joining the crew to offer such substantial scholarships of When she looked at what she had pho- typo in Los Angeles is defi nitely a cut 330,000 feet above the Earth’s surface this type. tographed -- there was nothing. above the rest. aboard the XCOR Lynx Mark II shuttle. League of Legends players control A photo of the sign made its way to Deroche said that for each $1 million warriors battling it out in a science fi c- Imgur and was tracked down by some- the Urgency Network raises on the Ticket tion-like setting. one to an address in Brentwood. to Rise campaign, it will purchase an ad- Dispelling any doubt about its popu- The sign was supposed to say “1 Hour ditional seat on an XCOR space voyage. larity, a League of Legends championship Parking.” sold out the Staples Center in Los Ange- In a city known for hefty parking me- les last October. ter fees and fi nes, the typo generated Ka-Ching! The game is very challenging and de- some amount of excitement, especially mands a well-thought strategy, Andrew online. Scholarships Dixon, a University senior said. The Los Angeles Department of “You have the physical — you have Transportation confi rmed its existence: For Slaying like football and basketball and all that “The sign was reported on Wednesday, Video Game Foes — this is a very mentally taxing game, es- June 18,” said LADOT spokesman Jon- pecially when you’re being pitted against athan Hui. “We fabricated a new sign ote to parents: All those hours fi ve other individuals,” he said. and replaced it today, June 20, around your kids spend blazing a trail of Dixon is also on the university’s volley- 11 a.m.” Ndestruction in video games may ball team and sees similarities between Hui said he wasn’t sure when the not be a complete waste of time, after all. the virtual and the real sporting worlds. 1-minute parking sign was installed. A small private university in Chicago “Even when you lose, you’re able to But a quick search of the address on is offering hefty scholarship for players go back and evaluate your game play,” Google Maps shows that it’s been there of one game in particular, League of Leg- Dixon said. “A lot of times you’re able to The cell window, pictured as it should look since at least 2011. ends, which has become one of the most record matches and review them, kind of above, and below with the spooky woman popular games for organized team com- like watching game fi lm.” peering through petitions. $10 Could Get You The University announced its new program this month and said it recog- There’s A New A Ticket nizes the growing legitimacy of what are known as “eSports.” The school says it ‘World’s Ugliest Dog’ To Outer Space also wants to give credit to those with a t’s that time of year again when dogs he elite club of astronauts is lim- competitive spirit who don’t necessarily with unusually large heads, hairless ited to just over 500 people. But want to play traditional sports such as Ibodies and other oddities compete Tif you’ve ever wanted to make the basketball or football. to be the World’s Ugliest Dog. voyage yourself, it might only cost you Associate Athletic Director Kurt This year’s winner? A 2-year-old mutt $10. Melcher, who will be in charge of the named Peanut, whose wild white and The Urgency Network, a nonprof- school’s new varsity eSports program, it startup, is behind several goodwill said that he expected a certain amount of CONTINUED ON P. 20 campaigns that use their connections to celebrities like Hugh Jackman, Paul McCartney and Richard Branson to of- fer donors unique experiences. The model of Urgency Network is pretty simple: Donate $10 to a good cause, and you’ll be entered into a raf- Sillery-Walsh’s partner, Paul Rice, fl e to win an amazing prize. Each $10 who was on the tour with her, thinks donation gets you another ticket, and something supernatural is afoot in- after the fi rst donation, donors can also deed. volunteer for a variety of tasks to earn “I do think that the woman in the additional tickets. photo is a ghost,” he said, by way of And now, thanks to the “Ticket to “her” clothes and hair, all of a different Rise” campaign, that $10 donation could era. land you a spot on an XCOR fl ight, one

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 19 Snippets Of Strange

CONTINUED FROM P. 19 The dogs are scored by a three-judge Melissa Parsons posted the video on- panel in several categories, including line after capturing it on her cellphone brown hair, bulging eyes and protruding special or unusual attributes, personality because she didn’t think Nelson’s moves teeth belie his sweet, energetic person- and natural ugliness. were appropriate for children to see. ality. The past fi ve winners have included “As a parent and seeing all the parents a duck-footed beagle, boxer and basset that were covering their kids eyes and hound mix with a waddle, a Chinese turning their heads away, it wasn’t some- crested and Chihuahua mix with a pro- thing you would expect to see in a Park truding tongue and short tufts of hair The boy only admitted his falsehood or anywhere from a grown man, especial- and a Chihuahua with a missing eye and after police started to get suspicious. ly a man in uniform,” Parsons said. . a camel’s back. Nelson started dancing at the park after he jumped in with a group of visi- Park Ranger Fired For tors who were doing the Macarena. The Boy Fakes Kidnapping 51-year-old plans to keep grooving, with Dancing On The Job or without his job. To Avoid “It’s all about enjoying what you do Going To Dentist and that’s the way I feel,” Deryl said. 12-year-old French boy deter- mined not go to the dentist de- Main Man Ban Acided the best way to get out of it Although Peanut is healthy now, his was to fake his own kidnapping. Leaves Dutch owner, Holly Chandler says he was seri- The police found the boy hiding and ously burned as a puppy, resulting in bald questioned him about what he was do- Without A Van patches all over his body. ing. he suspension of captain Robin Chandler hopes Peanut’s victory will He told police a man who was “Eu- van Persie from the World Cup help raise awareness about animal abuse. ropean-looking, aged in his thirties, of TGroup B decider against Chile “We’re trying to use him as a poster muscular build with a height of around Tennessee park ranger says he was means the Netherlands will play an in- child for what can happen to animals 1.70 [5’6’’] and a vertical scar on his right fi red for dancing on the job after a ternational without a player whose sur- who are abused,” she said. cheek” abducted him from the neighbor- Avisitor to the park posted a video name begins with ‘Van’ for the fi rst time She plans to use the $1,500 prize to pay ing town. of him busting a move on Facebook. in almost two decades. for other animals’ veterinary bills. The boy also described the car and the According to Deryl Nelson, his super- The last time it happened was in 1996 The contest, held at the Sono- clothing his captor was wearing. He said visors were not impressed with the video in a friendly against China, some 221 ma-Marin Fairgrounds in California, is he escaped the car before police found and he was terminated for “conduct un- matches ago. in its 26th year. him. becoming of a public employee.” Since then the Dutch have had at least

20 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Snippets Of Strange

that mostly because I also had a passen- Animal rights groups had pressured Graffiti Suspect Accused ger with me that was concerned for her the governor to veto it, saying the envi- safety as well.” ronment was not good for Tony. Truck Of Tagging Up Courtroom According to the police report, the stop owner Michael Sandlin asked Jindal 44-year-old was shaky and talking to him- to keep the tiger in the only home he’s During Hearing self while performing fi eld sobriety tests. ever known. On Vandalism Charges He also said he was interested in the car because “it looked like a futuristic ma- chine.” Disabled Woman one ‘Van’ on the fi eld but ironically, in Uses Backscratcher the reign of coach Louis van Gaal, that Family Forced To run is about to end. To Ward Off Intruder Van Persie is suspended after being Remove Free Library disabled Indiana woman was booked in the opening two wins over From Front Yard able to use a backscratcher and Spain and Australia. Aa wrench to fi ght off an intruder The last time the Netherlands played Kansas family was trying to share who invaded her home. in the World Cup fi nals without a ‘Van’ teenager who was appearing in their love of reading with their en- Patty Kearney was watching TV with they lost a group match in 1994 in Or- a California court to face charges Atire town when they built a free li- her husband when he got up to investi- lando to neighbors Belgium, for whom Aof graffi ti vandalism is accused brary in their front yard on Mother’s Day, gate a loud crash on the back porch. Franky van der Elst lined up on the other of tagging up the inside of the Superior but the city is forcing them to hide that The 63-year-old, who has lung can- side. Courthouse during his April appearance. love away. cer, saw her husband backing out of the Injury before the tournament in Brazil Francisco Canseco was arrested on room with his hands in the air. A man kept Rafael van der Vaart out of the Dutch fi ve new felony counts of vandalism after wearing a hockey mask began threatening squad and full back Gregory van der Wiel, a deputy was able to use a graffi ti track- the Kearneys with a wrench and demand- who played in the 2010 fi nal, was left out ing system to match the 18-year-old to the ing money. Unfortunately for him, Kear- because of poor form. graffi ti in the courthouse. ney fi gured out that he didn’t have a gun Dutch football is littered with venera- Offi cials with the County Sheriff’s De- and went after him with a backscratcher. ble footballing ‘Vans’ - Marco van Basten, partment Court Services Bureau Investi- “I said not in my house, not in my Edwin van der Sar, Giovanni van Bronck- gations Unit searched Canseco’s home house, and I boom, boom, boom,” Kear- horst and Ruud van Nistelrooy in recent and found evidence that tied him to the ney said. “I just hit him in the head, hit times and the likes of Willem van Hane- to the courthouse graffi ti. The Collins family was told that their him in the head, hit him until he got gem and the Van der Kerkhof brothers, The San Diego Police Department had “Little Free Library” violates an ordinance right there.” who played in past World Cups. previously arrested Canseco in connec- that bans detached structures. Rather tion with more than 60 cases of graffi ti than pay the $25 per-day fi ne, they opted involving the same moniker that was to put the library in the garage. Man Gets Fired On used in the courthouse. Spencer Collins, 9, doesn’t agree with the policy and is planning to address the 40th Birthday Then city council in July. Man Arrested For “I would tell them why it’s good for Torches Ex-Boss’s the community and why they should Truck And House Harassing Couple In Car drop the law,” he said. “I just want to talk to them about how good it is.” nstead of lighting candles to cel- He Thought Was An The motto of the little library was When the man dropped the wrench, ebrate his 40th birthday, a Florida Alien Spaceship “take a book, leave a book.” Kearney picked it up and hit him with Iman allegedly got fi red up and “We empathize with them, but we still that too until he ran out the door. torched his former boss’s truck and house have to follow the rules,” said Richard “If he hadn’t have got out that back after he was let go for always showing up Coleman. “We need to treat everybody door, I’d have beat him to death. And I to work “high.” the same. So we can’t say if somebody know I would’ve because I was that mad Damion Haywood has been charged fi les a complaint but we like the little at that person in my house for doing this with fi rst and second-degree arson for libraries -- we think they’re cute -- so we to me,” she said. allegedly starting fi res at the home of ignore it. We can’t do that.” 79-year-old Willie Irven after he was giv- en his pink slip. Hot Air Balloon Lands Around noon that day, a witness saw his sounds like a close encounter Tony The Tiger At Women’s Prison Haywood hitting Irven’s truck with a with a blurred mind... Stays Put At metal gas can and pouring gasoline into T An Arkansas man was arrested nmates were sent indoors when a the truck. After Haywood lit the truck on and charged with driving while intoxi- Louisiana Truck Stop hot air balloon landed in the park- fi re, the witness asked Haywood why he cated and disorderly conduct after he al- Iing lot of an Oregon women’s prison, did it. legedly harassed a couple in a car because but it wasn’t an escape attempt. The pilot “Because I can. And I will light your he believed they were cruising around in told offi cials at the correctional facility house on fi re too.” a spaceship. He also thought the driver that he was taking part in a balloon festi- “I looked out the window and the was an alien. val but was running low on fuel and bat- man’s truck is on fi re and it’s getting big- The alleged victims called police after tling strong winds. ger, sir,” a 911 caller told dispatchers. “They Bushart began following them around Prison spokeswoman Vicki Reynolds put gas all over the car that’s inside the and then pulled up in front of their car to says the pilot decided the parking lot of hood now coming up out of the hood.” demand that the “alien take his spaceship the facility south of Portland was the The suspect is also accused of light- back to where they came from.” Bushart ouisiana’s governor has signed safest place to land. No one was hurt. ing Irven’s house on fi re, an attempt that is also accused of making threatening a law that the owners of a truck Reynolds says inmates who were in proved unsuccessful because the home gestures. Lstop where Tony the Tiger lives the recreation yard were sent inside for has asbestos siding. “That was my biggest problem with think is grrrrrrr-eat! about a half hour while the balloon was Haywood has been arrested 23 times what was going on was how upset he Gov. Bobby Jindal’s signature grants an removed. She says the parking lot is far since 1998. According to police, he con- was. I guess in reference to the vehicle exception to Louisiana law that lets the enough from the main prison that of- fessed to setting both the truck and was the only thing I could think,” driver tiger stay in his quarters at a Grosse Tete fi cials “felt confi dent in assuming this house on fi re. Jay Ward said. “I was a little upset about (TATE) truck stop. wasn’t an inmate escape attempt.”

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 21 22 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Heartwarming Headlines Hero Ex-Con Man’s Genetic Disorder Small Dog, Great Deed: Saves Baby Makes One Arm Maltese From Crawling Supersized, Becomes Finds Lost Wallet Onto Highway Arm Wrestling Champion 7-month-old Maltese puppy owned by Bonnie and Brad Gru- n ex-con who turned his life Aening likes to retrieve. Recently, around after spending a decade in Lady Bunny came home with an unex- Afederal lockup for drugs is being pected prize — a wallet its owner didn’t hailed as a hero after he saved a 15-month- know was lost. Saturday morning when they saw what old girl who wandered away from home The puppy found and brought home looked like fi sh jumping or birds feed- to the edge of a Georgia highway. a wallet belonging to Rudy Vonda, a ing on the surface of the water. Bryant Collins says that he’s been in a sanitation worker who drives a route in As they got closer, they saw it was ac- lot of “bad situations,” but still couldn’t their neighborhood tually a man treading water and waving believe his eyes when he spotted the The Gruenings called Vonda to report his T-shirt at them. Next to him was an toddler crawling perilously close to man’s rare genetic bone disorder their pooch had found his property. exhausted woman. Highway 72. resulted in his right arm being far “I didn’t even know my wallet was The three offi cers and a civilian who Abigger than his left. 27-year-old missing. I checked my back pocket to was fi shing with them helped the cou- Matthias Schlitte used that irregularity to make sure,” Vonda said. “When the lady ple onto their boat. his advantage and became a professional said a dog brought my wallet home, I The couple told them they fell off arm wrestling champion. “Everyone has fi gured it was a Labrador or German their boat in Key Largo about 14 hours a challenge in life,” Schlitte said. “I’m not Shepherd.” earlier. The boat was in gear and pulled a religious guy or anything but this was a He drove to the Gruenings’ home away from them, leaving them strand- gift from a higher power and this was my and instead saw a little white dog. ed. calling in life.” “When I pulled up to her place, she’s The couple appeared to have mild Schlitte said “I fi rst discovered I could coming out and she’s got her little dog hypothermia and some jellyfi sh stings. use my gift when I was three years of in her arms and my wallet,” Vonda said age. We had a family oven at home in with a laugh. Germany and I picked up a rather large The dog’s head was barely bigger College Rowing Team bucket of coal for the oven and carried than his wallet, Vonda said. it around for my mother, which was Lady Bunny has a good nose. She has Rescues Woman “I had seen something out of the cor- brought home other treasures, Bonnie ner of my eye, and I thought it was a Gruening said. “She particularly likes to In Mississippi River baby,” Collins said. “I just stopped and, take our neighbors’ shoes.” our members of a university row- when I got out, there was a baby — al- The puppy took the wallet directly to ing team are being hailed as heroes most in the highway.” Brad Gruening. Fafter they rescued a woman they ‘What’s going on?” Collins said he “It was really neat because we were had come across in the Mississippi River. asked himself. “A baby?’” able to get it back to the owner,” Bon- Recently, two coaches and two rowers The stunned auto repairman scooped nie Gruening said, “Then to fi nd out were practicing on the water when they up the little girl from the grassy road- he’s our sanitation guy, which is so awe- came across an injured woman who had side, called 911 and then started playing some — they work so hard and do such become tangled in tree branches along gospel music on his cell phone to calm a good job.” the shore. The woman who was rescued the crying tot. probably very uncommon for a three- had already been in the water for a while. He comforted the child for two year-old.” Schlitte now has a right fore- While the woman was conscious, hours while police tried to fi gure out arm that measures 46cm (18 in) around. it appeared she was suffering from a where the baby came from and how it Schlitte began competing in arm broken leg, possibly broken ribs, and got there. wrestling competitions in 2004 after hypothermia. “I can’t imagine her last- It appears the toddler was left in the his mother spotted a fl yer at a gas sta- ing much longer,” assistant coach Peter care of older siblings who lost track of tion looking for male arm wrestlers up Morgan said. “There are not many peo- her on Friday. to 90kg (198 lbs). “I was 16 and I went ple on the river. We are very thankful She crawled away from home and into this small bar in Haldensleben and we were there.” 300 yards through the woods before I only weighed 65kg (143 lbs),” he said. Vonda fi gures his wallet fell as he slid When the rowing team got to the tumbling down an embankment and “All these bigger men were laughing at out of his truck cab to adjust a can for woman, they threw her a life jacket then making her way to the highway, me, but when I beat them all the men pickup. The wallet’s drab olive green and then pulled her out of the water where she could easily have been run changed from laughing to respect and color could easily have kept it lost. and onto a motorboat that was being over. the rest is history.” “That was a real surprise,” Vonda said operated by one of the coaches. They Fortunately, aside from some super- Schlitte has earned 8 German na- of its return. “It was like a dog from then brought her to their rowing club, fi cial injuries, the baby was fi ne. tional championships, 14 international heaven.” where an ambulance came to pick her “Honestly, that’s almost a miracle,” championships, and even beat a spe- up. The woman was taken to a local Thomas said. cially designed arm wrestling robot. hospital with what appeared to be non- For Collins, the incident was an op- Another notable feat by Schlitte was 14 Hours life threatening injuries. It is unclear as portunity to show he is a changed man. becoming the youngest ever champion to how she wound up in the river. “I did 10 years in the federal institu- of an international tournament. Treading Water: tion for manufacturing cocaine,” he The arm wrestler has a sense of said. “When I was in prison, I made a humor about his unusual arm. He’s Couple Rescued very conscientious effort to change, been featured in comedic commer- Off Florida and I did.” cials for the Australian company, AEG He said he’s stayed out of trouble for Powertools, playing up his supersized hree off-duty offi cers on a fi shing fi ve years, and for that, a curly-haired strength. trip rescued a couple who had strawberry blonde can forever be Schlitte wouldn’t change anything Tbeen treading water for 14 hours thankful. about himself and is grateful for his life after falling off their boat in Key Largo. “It made me feel good, that I could saying, “I have spent 10 years traveling Two detectives and a fi refi ghter/ be in society and do good,” Collins said. around the world doing what I love.” paramedic were fi shing for dolphin

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 23 Helplessness

CONTINUED FROM P. 1 ach stands up to Moshe, demanding he step down. What is Moshe’s re- community of am Yisrael painfully sponse, after falling on his face? To look at a renewed, unsolvable Schal- talk to Korach and his men. That is it-like problem – that of captured/kid- a second reaction. Talking, getting napped Jews. your feelings out, talking to both What do we do? your friends and family, and even to How do we cope with this hope- the enemy. Talk it out. less situation? The third (BaMidbar 16:20-22): Af- (I’m not even referring to the most ter Hashem threatens to destroy, in diffi cult dilemma we face: of whether an instant, the entire congregation or not we negotiate to release them. of Korach. What is Moshe’s response, If we do this and release a thousand after falling on his face? To pray to prisoners, it merely encourages our Hashem not to punish the entire peo- enemies to redouble their efforts to ple for one person’s mistake. That is do it again. Yet we cannot let them a third reaction: praying or learning, rot forever; we must do everything in What can we do in the face of such helplessness? the quintessential Jewish response. our power to get them back, for our Let’s do what Jews have done for millennia: Look at the Torah To pray to Hashem, like tens of thou- own way of life revolves around our sands have been doing, both publicly caring for every Jew, and our motiva- and privately. Prayer! tion to fi ght for this land comes from millennia: Look at the Torah. Let’s next week’s Torah portions (Sh’lach The fourth (BaMidbar 17:9-11): Af- the knowledge that we will not be see what we can glean from our Book L’cha, Korach, Chukas). ter Korach has been swallowed up left there.) of Books. Maybe, just maybe, the The key phrase is “fall on his/their by the earth, and Hashem issues an So, again: What can we do in the greatest teacher of all time, Moshe, face(s),” which appears fi ve times over almost identical threat to the peo- face of such helplessness? can help us, and maybe, just maybe, it the course of these three portions. ple that he will destroy them with Let’s do what Jews have done for is within this week’s, last week’s, and It’s a strange enough expression, and a plague. What is Moshe’s response, one that, a quick Google search re- after falling on his face? To act! To veals, appears 27 times in Tanach: take the incense, and with it stop 1 of them is irrelevant: Goliath fall- the plague. To spring to action is the ing, having been killed by David. fourth reaction, in any way we can: if 12 of them are of people falling be- it is helping the IDF in their quest to fore the glory of Hashem or an angel. fi nd the boys by providing food and 5 of them are people falling before support – going out and giving what a king/prophet out of respect. we can; if it is gathering donations 2 of them are Abraham communi- of clothes or money for the families cating with Hashem. or soldiers; if it is organizing a rally 2 of them are David and Ezekiel, or a protest, whether online or of- also communicating with Hashem. fl ine. Action! That leaves fi ve: once in Parshas The fi fth and most puzzling, though, Sh’lach L’cha, three times in Korach, comes next week (BaMidbar 20:1-11), and once in Chukas. and it is when the people are com- All fi ve are Moshe, with or without plaining that they have no water – that Aaron. it would have been better to die al- All fi ve are directly after a horrifi c ready than to be without water. What event happens to him. is Moshe’s response, after falling on his All fi ve are his reaction to this face? The glory of Hashem appears to event, and it seems to me that this him; Hashem tells him to speak to the falling on his face is symbolizing in- rock and, famously, Moshe blatantly credible helplessness in a horrifi c sit- disobeys Hashem’s command and hits uation. the rock instead, thereby incurring the Each of the fi ve is followed by a punishment of not entering the land. very different reaction, and it is from I think the request that Hashem this that I think we can learn some- had of Moshe was one that even for thing about what we can do. him was too diffi cult: to change him- How, then, does Moshe Rabbeinu self… to speak to the rock… to change cope with helplessness? the way of thinking, of looking at The fi rst (BaMidbar/Numbers 14:1- things, so as not to let the helpless 5): Moshe is told by the people, after situation, which was beyond his the failure of the spies, to appoint power to change, from destroying a new leader and that they want to him. Moshe fails at this, yet the re- return to Egypt. What is Moshe’s sponse is clear: Change the way you response, after falling on his face? think about it. Nothing! He does nothing. That is Which of these reactions is cor- one response to helplessness: to sim- rect? They all are. It is up to us to ply curl up and do nothing. This is decide what to do: to do nothing, to not necessarily a bad thing to do. It talk it out, to pray, to take whatever may not be productive, but to not re- action we can, or to change the way act and not do anything, as there is we think so we can continue our no point, is a legitimate reaction. lives. May Hashem soon bring those The second (BaMidbar 16:1-7): Kor- boys home.

Betsalel Steinhart is the Director of Jewish and Israel Education at Tichon Ramah Yerushalayim, of Ramah, Israel. He lives in Jerusalem with his wife and fi ve children.

24 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Blue And White Shmuel Sackett Tragedy Brings Unity

CONTINUED FROM P. 1 traffi c in Jerusalem, the price of coffee risking their lives searching for the boys. to get along – so isn’t the same thing true (more expensive than Starbucks…) and The same 100,000 Jews who demonstrat- with our Father in heaven? While I don’t the Jewish world is splintered, fragment- even the weather (how come it’s so hot ed in Manhattan – just a few weeks ago claim to know anything about Hashem, ed, and divided. I have no problem that in that country?). In short, we change the – against the draft – are now davening for I feel certain that He wants His children each one of us has unique minhagim and famous rabbinic teaching of “Say a little the Israeli Army to succeed in its mission. to respect one other. Obviously, His chil- special ways to serve Hashem, but why and do a lot” to “Appreciate a little and In addition to the above, another mag- dren are different, and that’s perfectly can’t we respect each other more than we complain a lot.” ical thing happens: We stop calling the okay – as long as those differences don’t do? Why can’t we realize that it doesn’t cause internal wars. I feel that when they matter if a Jewish man wears a black hat, get out of hand, Hashem reminds us of knitted kipah or no hat and no kipah? Suddenly, even without noticing it, we do a major thing: the need to live and act as one, by send- And women are the same: Some cover ing some tragedy that brings us all closer. their hair, others don’t; some wear long We start loving every Jew on the planet! The trick is to try to be united without skirts while others fi nd pants more com- the tragedy! fortable. Obviously, it is important to ob- Therefore, here is what I recommend: serve the halachah, and it is our responsi- And then it happens: tragedy. Nearly Jewish complaint department. We be- In addition to everything else you are do- bility to teach those who do not, but this 3,000 New Yorkers die on 9/11. Hurricane come thankful for what we have and we ing to help tip the scales in favor of the must be done with love, friendship, and Sandy destroys thousands of homes and see the good in everything we do. Trivial boys, take upon yourself an oath that you lots of tolerance. I always think of my lives. And now this one: Three teenage complaints – which used to ruin our en- will stop dividing between Jews. From parents’ generation. How many of the re- boys in Israel are kidnapped as they head tire day – are deleted and we say “Baruch this day forth you will accept all Jews ligious women covered their hair back in home from school. Where are they? How Hashem” even though our back is killing with love and tolerance and will welcome the 1940s and ‘50s? How many weddings are they? What is happening to them? us. We look at the parents of these beau- every Yid with a warm and gentle smile had separate seating? How many butcher We run to daven for their wellbeing. We tiful boys and realize what they are going – especially the ones who don’t look or shops were glatt kosher? While I am hap- give extra charity, increase our Torah through. After that, the high priced cof- dress like you. You must also stop com- py that things have improved, we need to learning, light Shabbos candles early, fee in Mamilla or long lines at the super- plaining and start living a life of “Gam zo understand that what we have today was bake challah for the boys, and sit quietly market mean absolutely nothing. l’tovah” – that everything that happens is built on what was done yesterday – so in shul. Suddenly, even without noticing My question is simply “Why??” Why for the good. Make these pledges now those things aren’t as bad as you think! it, we do a major thing: We start loving can’t we live like this all the time? Why and keep them, even when this horri- We always do this to ourselves and every Jew on the planet! Overnight, our can’t we live in a Jewish world where we ble kidnapping story is over. Let’s show never learn from our mistakes. During differences disappear and there are no respect every brother and sister we have Hashem that we are truly one family and good times we are fi ghting with the gab- more labels. Who cares about silly terms and not cast evil eyes upon them? All that we don’t need tragedies to keep us bai, complaining about the rabbi, and such as yeshivish, Modern, Sephardic, mothers and fathers want their children close. Make that commitment today! pointing fi ngers at the neighbor’s kid. Ashkenazic, chasidic, chareidi or chilo- We are jealous of our friend’s success ni??? Those are all gone. Instantly, we Shmuel Sackett is a 100% product of Queens. He was born in Middle Village and and complain about everything human- are simply the Jewish Nation. We are one moved to KGH shortly before his bar-mitzvah. He graduated from YCQ (1975) and ly possible. We don’t like the yeshivah, people, serving one G-d and begging Him YHSQ (1979). He was Havurat Yisrael’s fi rst Youth Director (4 years) and started the the eruv, and even fi nd fault in the shul’s to have mercy on Eyal, Naftali, and Gilad. fi rst 2 NCSY chapters in Queens. Shmuel made aliyah in 1990 and co-founded Manhi- kiddush (What, no cholent??)! We return All the walls of division are gone as we gut Yehudit, together with Moshe Feiglin. His website is www.JewishIsrael.org Sack- from a trip to Israel and kvetch about the also pray for the holy soldiers who are ett is married with 6 children and 4 grandchildren. He lives in Herziliya Pituach.

him better serve Hashem. tivation. Earning a living isn’t easy. Earning A Living Doesn’t Have To Be Diffi cult Hashem was telling Moshe and Aharon Market economies rise and fall. Entire that this lesson would have greatly af- industries come and go. Careers that CONTINUED FROM P. 16 Obstacles That Prevent Us fected the generation of the desert, but are in high demand in one decade are From Serving Hashem it was lost. Had the people seen the rock outsourced and sent overseas the next. that Hashem rewards every good that The answer to this question is based obeying Hashem’s command, they would Financial security in an ever-changing a person does, the place of that reward on understanding the Rambam (in have been moved to a powerful realiza- world is fragile at best. is in the World to Come. In fact, it is Hilchos T’shuvah, Perek 9). He explains tion: “The rock doesn’t have needs, yet While our main motivation to keep considered a curse to use up your pay- that even though we don’t receive re- it listens to Hashem. How much more the Torah is that Hashem commanded ment in this world – something that ward for doing mitzvos in this world, if so should we, who have so many needs? us to do it for our benefi t in the World is reserved for wicked people. So it a person keeps the Torah properly, then Hashem has promised that if we follow to Come, the reality is that we live in this doesn’t seem to be correct that their Hashem will remove all of the obstacles in his ways, He will remove all obstacles world. We have bills to pay, children to livelihood was dependent upon listen- that normally prevent a person from from our path. But if we don’t listen...” put through school, and many, many fi - ing to Hashem. keeping the mitzvos. Sickness, war, pov- That was a lesson that would have af- nancial obligations. Knowing that Hash- The second problem with this Rashi erty, and hunger prevent a person from fected even this generation because their em will remove the obstacles standing is that any motivational system must be learning or fulfi lling the mitzvos. If a very survival depended on it. While peo- in our way, as long as we dedicate our- tailored to fi t the audience. The people person is happy and dedicates himself to ple may have many lofty motives, one of selves to passionately keeping the Torah, of this generation received the Torah keeping the Torah, Hashem will shower our strongest drives is self-preservation. can be a great impetus to growth. on Har Sinai. They spent almost forty him with all of the requirements to bet- Had that generation come to a clearer This is not to say that life will be a bed years surrounded by the Clouds of Glo- ter serve Him, including peace, tranquil- recognition that their existence was of roses. There will still be nisyonos (life ry, completely immersed in Torah study, ity, well-being, sustenance, and all else dependent upon keeping the Torah, it tests) and different settings that we need and sustained by the man (manna). that a person needs to follow the Torah. would have changed even their appreci- for various reasons. However, the basic They were on the highest madreigah The Rambam is telling us that since ation — but it was a lesson lost. starting position is that Hashem will take of any generation in history. So even Hashem created the world in order to care of my needs so that I can better serve if their parnasah was dependent upon have man follow the Torah, when a per- Earning a living isn’t easy Him. That understanding can aid us to their listening, how would they be mo- son uses the world properly, then Hash- The concept that Hashem takes care focus on our true purpose in this world tivated by something so mundane as em allows him to have his needs met in of our needs when we use our lives and allow us a much greater degree of earning their daily bread? this world without strain. This will help properly can be a great source of mo- success in all of our endeavors.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 25 Hooked On Healing Caroline Schumsky, LCSW, MS To Give Or Not To Give

Have no clue? Just Do. sneering and mockery. what degree do I throw myself into sure as light illuminates the darkness. Surprisingly, giving is not I now know it was one of the great- it? To what extent do I give? And how better to serve the Divine 1necessarily just about a need est and most painful gifts I received. Don’t Count the Amount. Architect than with acts of grace and you recognize in others. It is really Yes, teach. As a matter of fact: I did How much can I admittedly good-will. about the doing: the act of doing. and do want to “change the world,” 3really do? Okay. All the self-serving reasons Did you ever refl ect on why it feels thankuverymuch. Don’t count. No contest here. Tru- you’ve been waiting for. Research so good to bestow kindness on oth- Correct me if I’m a bit sideways on ly. shows that giving to others actu- ers, even strangers? Ah. You are of- this one, but…Is that not what Tikun No idea how? Start with the per- ally activates regions of the brain fering the choicest part of yourself, Olam is all about? son right next to you. associated with satisfaction, social aren’t you? Since that event, not so long ago Is “spiritualizing the Cosmos too connection, and trust. It releases So, don’t be stingy, eh. (okay...it was high school), I came grandiose a term for you? Is it simply that awesome oxytocin. You know, No Sparing your Sharing. across this gem, sweet readers: too hard to turn a life around? Not that groovy hormone that induces Share. Even if they don’t When people hurt you, over and so, sweet friends. Never underrate feelings of warmth, euphoria, and a 2need it. Even if they don’t ask over, think of them like sandpaper: the power of a touch, a smile, an un- sweet connection with others, creat- for it. Even if they don’t admit they ing a “warm glow” effect within us. want it (especially then.) Sweet bonus, eh? Why do you suppose we feel G-d’s “If you think you’re too small to make a difference, When we give to others, we don’t love fl owing right through us when only make them feel closer to us; we are thoughtful, considerate, and you haven’t spent the night with a mosquito.” we, in turn, feel closer to them. And, kind? hey, sometimes it even elicits appre- Could it be that we serve a cause ciation and gratitude. Not to mention greater than ourselves? They may scratch and hurt you a bit, expected compliment, a listening ear, that it’s contagious. In high school, as a wide-eyed teen but in the end, you end up polished your time, your presence. There’s an old African proverb that (a very sensitive, impressionable, al- and they end up useless. And above all…. goes like this:“If you think you’re too truistic teen, I might add), a teacher I suppose we do not know how Be Imbued with Attitude. small to make a difference, you haven’t once mocked my aspirations, saying: they “end up,” but I sure could use a One of the most phenomenal spent the night with a mosquito.” “So, Caroline, you want to change the glossy, shiny, more lustrous fi nish, no 4ways to give is to give away at- So go out there, sweet friends, and world, huh?” At the time, all I felt doubt. titude. offer, give away, pass on, put on, and were knots in my belly, thanks to her So how much do I ante up, and to Upbeat, light, peaceful, cheerful: share, share, share. The effect on those you “infect” is And please don’t hesitate to share inexpressible. It dissolves sadness as with me how it all turned out.

Caroline is a licensed psychotherapist, crisis counselor, writer, and dance instructor. She has worked extensively with Jewish outreach and is as an individual psycho- therapist. She can be reached at 917-717-1775, at [email protected], or at facebook.com/pages/Safe-Haven-Healing.

Check out previous editions at queensjewishlink.com

26 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Politics & Ethics Abe Fuchs Situational Awareness Is Derech Eretz

CONTINUED FROM P. 1 and helpful is opening up your world to advice, I felt that I didn’t have to prepare icism and ignorance from some (“smart-al- the next person’s, and it opens up all types during the summer for the upcoming ecky”) frum people. “He’ll get on the ballot a young, well-groomed frum person, and of avenues for chesed, understanding, and “faherr” (test) to the yeshivah, because I anyway,” “Will I get money in my pocket the transaction seemed to be taking time. good will. Rabbi Turk emphasized that had been the valedictorian in Gemara in if I sign for him?” or “I stay away from pol- It turns out that he was relating a story to while speaking to a person who is not fa- my admittedly small class at the Hebrew itics” are some of the refrains I hear why the teller even after they had fi nished the miliar with Orthodoxy, it’s important to Academy in Washington. Naturally, the they don’t want to sign a petition. Rarely transaction, but I couldn’t really make out speak English without the Hebrew and faherr did not go well and the yeshivah do I ever get a “yasher koach” for petition- what he was saying. Another teller then Yiddish thrown in (Yinglish or Hebrish), refused me admission. The school year ing from house to house. Why? Because opened her window and when I inched which he said is a challenge to most frum had already started and because no ad- there is a total lack of situational aware- closer to the front of the customer line, people. For me, again, this is SA. vanced planning was made, another ness. Frum Jews don’t know or realize I could hear him inform the teller about At the end of Rabbi Turk’s talk, I asked yeshivah didn’t even entertain admit- that the government provides support to Judaism and how it’s not right to hurt him – in light of what he just spoke about ting me, as they explained: “This isn’t a the Jewish community by way of grants other people’s feelings. He went on to – how he assesses the role of the musar subway station where you just come in to Tomchei Shabbos, subsidies to build- say that he may have been guilty of this, programs of various yeshivos. He an- whenever you want.” Later, a Lubavitch ing security enhancements, and zoning and he was even explaining it with some swered that Chofetz Chaim had a good high school did take me in, but because I allowances for yeshivos and shuls, as well nuance, because as he was explaining, he musar program. I didn’t want to argue the wasn’t oriented in their ways I switched as parking situations for such, but perhaps used his Talmudic thumb gesture to illus- point, but his answer just covered one ye- to Chofetz Chaim. Before I was admitted most of all provides security through the trate his point. The teller wasn’t about to shivah, which seemed like a weak answer to the Lubavitch school, I didn’t have a FBI, CIA, and local police forces so that ask him to move on, because the banks at best. Secondly, Chofetz Chaim was ad- real place to eat or sleep. The yeshivos Jews can feel secure in their public gather- on Main Street are so squeezed with com- vanced with a kiruv approach and certain that denied me admission did not even ings and not have to worry about neo-Na- petition from each other and they have to mature young men of the yeshivah g’dolah inquire as to where I would go and zis and militant Islamists wanting to do us be very courteous to their customers. So were very good at it, but by no means was whether I would have somewhere to be harm. Where is the hakaras ha’tov for the I took it upon myself to remove this chi- it so refi ned that many others would not in the interim. In Chofetz Chaim I was US Armed Forces? How many religious lul Hashem and reminded him that there Jews marched in this year’s Memorial Day was a customer waiting behind him. He Parade? How many yeshivos, as a promi- made a joke to the effect that I was an in- I feel the reason Orthodox Jews end up too often nent rabbi asked, hang US fl ags from their spector, but he moved on. on the front pages of newspapers with scandals buildings on Memorial Day or July Fourth? The young man was well intentioned, I may be shunned in some circles for but it’s not the right time to explain Juda- is because we forget saying this, but I feel that the reason ism to a bank teller when there are peo- how to translate Torah teachings to practicalities of daily life Orthodox Jews end up too often on the ple waiting behind you. This made me front pages of newspapers with scandals think of a lecture by Rabbi Moshe Turk, of slum lording or money schemes is be- director of the Jewish Heritage Center, at have benefi tted from a practical guide to advanced a year ahead in religious stud- cause we get caught up in the technical- a Young Israel of Kew Gardens Hills sum- musar. What was in practice was inspira- ies, but to the yeshivos who wouldn’t ities of religion and we forget the bigger mer lecture. He spoke about kiruv and tional talks by some of the rebbeim and accept me, I was just an applicant who picture of how to translate Torah teach- how the most important thing frum peo- the high school principal on how to excel didn’t fi t the mold and not the eager ings to practicalities of daily life. How we ple can do to draw irreligious Jews back in Torah study. The rosh ha’yeshivah for child to learn, which I really was. treat each other, be it in marriage or just to the faith is not so much brushing up the yeshivah g’dolah provided intellectu- Christianity became such a powerful to neighbors, being ethical in business on evolution theory or providing philo- al and arguably theoretical approaches force all over the world because the mis- and doing good for the community, de- sophical answers about G-d’s role during to musar, and quite a few students, from sionaries mixed good work with religion. serve much greater attention than is cur- catastrophic events, but rather role mod- what I observed, were not absorbing the As they fed the poor and tended to the rently given. Why should only Christians eling good behavior to other Jews and basics. Specifi cally, what I have in mind is sick, they introduced their religion to be known for “good works”? Why should even to non-Jews. Being friendly, consid- that even in the yeshivah g’dolah, when I a spiritually-deprived populace. There Jews be stigmatized with stereotypes of erate, and helpful is the single factor in asked some of the “older” guys questions are now over 2 billion Christians in the stinginess and selfi shness? Anti-Sem- showing others how wonderful our reli- about Gemara or hashkafah (philosophy), world. World Jewish population is strug- itism is certainly part of the answer, gion is – this was his message. This was their responses were not always tendered gling between 14 and 18 million, depend- but Jews have something to learn from very refreshing to hear and something with care and understanding. The reality ing on the defi nition of “Jewish.” I am Christians in how to reach out to others that I believe in very strongly myself. Ye- is that bullying, drug use, and family cha- not saying that proselytizing was ever a in society with grace and good-will. Per- shiva Chofetz Chaim, from which Rabbi os are found in Orthodox circles as well, goal for the Jewish religion or its adher- haps when more Orthodox Jews show Turk is a musmach and where I also at- and I don’t see the yeshivos providing the ents. But certainly, not losing Jews to up serving lunches in soup kitchens, care tended high school and fi rst year yeshi- answers. non-observance or to other religions is. I for the homeless and veterans, get more vah g’dolah, pioneered kiruv 40 years ago. An even more powerful example of posit here that Jewish Orthodoxy, tradi- involved with American political issues, Situational awareness is very tough for the lack of practice of Rabbi Turk’s mes- tionally, carried with it a distinct insular- will the rate of Jewish assimilation de- lots of us because we have to have the big sage is illustrated by the following: As I ity. “Daled amos” is a halachic term de- crease or reverse. Situational Awareness picture to do it right. True musar to me once related in one of my columns, my noting a measure of about eight feet, but is seeing society as a whole. We cannot is having situational awareness (SA for parents had wonderful qualities, but it may as well be a symbolism by which live in a bubble anymore. short) and that is what the frum young coming from the shtetl life, they did not Orthodoxy philosophically constrains its While there are many, many frum Jews man in the bank was lacking. Most con- understand the American way of doing own sphere of infl uence. who are very “situationally aware” – and fl icts arise from people lacking SA, as it is things. When I graduated from the He- As I petition again, for no less merito- are indeed so because of their Orthodox a defi cit of an understanding of the other brew Academy of Washington (DC) at rious a candidate – Assemblyman Michael upbringing, perhaps likely at higher per- person’s perspective, which means that the end of ninth grade, my parents and Simanowitz, an Orthodox Jew – I once centages than the general public – the per- one can be 100% right, but as long as peo- I wanted that I go on to yeshivah in New again am confronted too often with cyn- centages should really be much higher. ple do not see it from the other person’s York. Both of my older brothers had standpoint – they are lacking SA, or the gone to a certain yeshivah there and it Abe Fuchs was born in Wash. D.C. and attended high school at the Mesivta of For- big picture. Listening in today’s world is was expected that I would be admitted est Hills. He spent three years in yeshiva (Rabbinical Seminary, B’nei Torah and Sh’or a much underrated quality, as it is the pri- as well, so my parents left it to my older Yashuv) in NY. He worked 25 years for the U.S Postal Service, retiring in 2009. In 2012, mary controlling factor in resolving con- brother, then 18, and I, 15, to make the ar- Abe ran against Nily Rozic for NY State Assembly District 25. He can be reached at fl icts. Trying to be friendly, considerate, rangements. Against my older brother’s [email protected]

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 27 Education And Employment Elly D. Lasson, PhD, Executive Director of Joblink of Maryland The Eyes Have It: Five Keys to Effectively Connect

ost would agree that having on a single person to the exclusion of quality “eye contact” is an the others will indicate that you are Madvantage in life; it positive- ignoring them, and you give the im- ly affects interpersonal relationships pression that you are not validating as well as workplace interactions. their presence. One scenario that has Here are fi ve specifi c areas in which become more commonplace is when eye contact should be executed. The interviewing for a job with a panel. contexts could be a presentation, job Another is when you are making a interview, or any conversation for formal presentation to a group. Make that matter. an effort to scan the room. We natu- rally tend to focus on those who are Match with the verbal: In your either familiar to us or on whom we initial approach to a new party believe to be the most infl uential per- 1or even someone with whom son in attendance. Sometimes your you already have established a rela- theory of who that is will be correct; tionship, eye contact should support sometimes, you guessed wrong. But what you are saying at the time. Dur- even if you are correct, it is possible ing an initial introduction of oneself that the others there will play some to another person, you should make role in the hiring process. Or, in the eye contact when stating your name. case of a presentation, they are the re- You should also be looking at the per- A smile combined with eye contact expresses that you want to be there. cipients of any messages you are try- son when he/she states his/her name. ing to communicate. Some of these Oftentimes, the close of a given inter- combined with eye contact expresses Don’t stare: Too much of a good same individuals might end up being active episode will conclude with a that you want to be there. Further- thing is often counterproduc- your co-workers and as such, are for- “thank you.” That is an opportunity more, it shows interest and enthusi- 4tive. Maintaining eye contact mulating their fi rst impressions of to take leave of the person with a sin- asm in what is being discussed. While throughout an interaction is a reason- you. So, engaging them with eye con- cere expression of gratitude. Looking this sounds basic, many job inter- able goal. But, if you don’t use selec- tact will always play well. at the person is a great way to rein- viewees fail as a result of not attend- tive diversion, you will come across It goes without saying that eye force that. When making a presenta- ing to this. Consequently, the desire as creepy and that will be a turnoff. contact that is devoid of substance tion to a group, part of effective pub- to work or be there is not conveyed. will not be totally effective. This lic speaking is not reading directly off Don’t leave anyone out: In could be verbal content (e.g., quality of one’s paper, but to “look up” and Don’t wander off: While mak- many of our interactions, were responses to interview questions) or engage the audience. ing a positive fi rst impression 5are not communicating one- a sincere emotional investment in 3is part of the game, eye con- on-one, but one-to-many. By focus- what is going on. As most things go, Match with the nonverbal: tact should not end with the hand- ing one’s eye contact and attention it’s a package deal. Similarly, a key contribution to shake or initial introduction. While 2any interpersonal communica- at times challenging, make a con- Elly D. Lasson, PhD, is a commentator on issues related to careers, employment, and tion is the nonverbal. Two gestures certed effort to maintain eye contact job search. He leads a nonprofi t organization, Joblink of Maryland, which supports that are most commonplace are the throughout the conversation, be it the employment objectives of members of the Jewish community. He has appeared handshake and the smile. Shaking formal or informal. Wandering off recently on the Nachum Segal Network and other general media outlets. He studied someone’s hand while looking over gives the impression that you are dis- in Yeshivas Ner Yisroel (earning a BTL degree), and he earned his BA in Psychology his shoulder will not cut it in engag- tracted, either from the discussion at from UMBC, as well as his MA and PhD degrees in Organizational Psychology from ing the person. Furthermore, a smile hand, or more generally. Wayne State University. A Difference In Thoughts CONTINUED FROM P. 9 the law should be about the bird. According to the Talmudic laws of normal, superhuman degree of holi- damages, if that bird belonged to ness that this Talmudic sage attained: somebody, would Rav Yonasan ben enough to create such a profound Uziel have to pay him for it? Is this physical alteration in the atmosphere a case of grama b’nizakin, where he over his head. And I keep wondering was indirectly involved in the dam- how a person can get to such a high age to the bird, or grama b’yadayim, level of sanctity. What is the way in which case he caused the bird’s that leads to a holiness like that?’ death as directly as if he had killed “The chasid fi nished speaking and it with his own hands?’ he too, noticed that the misnaged “And there,” concluded Rav Meir was far away in the realm of pure with an elfi n smile, “you have a thought. So he asked in turn, ‘And clear illustration of the difference what are you thinking about?’ The between the Polish and Lithuanian other replied, ‘I was wondering what styles of Talmud study.”

28 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 10 Red Flags Of Inappropriate Behavior For Sleep-Away, Overnight, And Day Camps By Tania Hammer assessments that dozens of Jewish camps get someone else’s attention. relationships. These are just as impor- have signed on to. You can access it All activities must be in groups tant as the inappropriate warning signs. efore your child goes to camp, through this link: vosizneias.com/wp-con- of at least two campers to one A counselor and camper may only touch have a discussion with him or tent/uploads/2010/04/camp12.pdf 4counselor. It could be that your another child in three places: the hand, Bher about camp safety. child was awarded a special privilege shoulder, and upper back – and only in Thirty years ago, when I was a teen, of one-on-one time with a counselor or the presence of other people. Unless the camp almost defi ned my life. My choic- 10 Red Flags other camp staff member. This could be child is in danger, there is no reason for es of clothing during the year revolved a useful activity for your child’s growth. any other areas to be touched. Pinching around “Would this be good for camp?” for Sleep-Away, Unless this activity happens on camp cheeks when kids are so cute is a grey and there was nothing in my life that was grounds in view of other campers, tell area. This does not have to be reported more fun. And so it is for many people, Overnight, your child not to leave the campsite to authorities, but campers should be to the point where some camp directors and Day Camps EVER unless IT’S WITH A GROUP. Your asked fi rst if this is okay with them. never left! According to the American child has rights and this is one of them. When a chi ld is in danger. A Camp Association, where all camps must Even if he/she is cajoled and coerced, child knows that a doctor must be accredited, an astounding 12 million Mental illness. Just as cancer or your child should feel confi dent to stand 9touch children in places that are kids registered for sleep away camp in heart disease is a physical illness, ground, unless it’s a family member your otherwise forbidden by anyone else in 2011! That’s a whole lot of fun for a whole 1so too is mental illness. Teach child feels comfortable with and knows. the presence of a parent; however, what lot of kids. your child that some people have this If your child is threatened to if your child had an accident at camp and However, camp is not fun for all kids. illness and make sure he/she under- keep silent. This is a big one. No you can’t get to the closest hospital on The world of safety in and out of camp stands that this illness has no outlying 5staff member has the authority to time? It is vital that your child under- is paramount, and there are many dan- effects such as a bald head or shortness threaten a camper. If your child misbe- stands that in such cases, the counselor gers lurking in the woods. Just this year, of breath. It manifests itself in behaviors. haves, you will be notifi ed of possible and/or other higher authorities at camp my dear friend was indicted on charges They must be aware of different types of consequences. Your child might need a will escort him/her to the hospital and of molestation that perhaps took place behavior. warning, but never a threat, such as, “If that you have given them permission to 30 years ago, according to some sketchy Alert your children about speak- you tell anyone, you will get into trou- oversee medical treatment until you can memory of a then-12-year-old. The accu- ing to a higher authority. By now, ble.” This is a huge red fl ag, and your make it to the hospital yourselves. This sation brought my friend to his knees, 2you should have already been in child has the right to inform authorities. means that if the doctor has to touch as he is in no way inclined towards any- touch with the counselor of your child’s Open communication. Your child anywhere around the bathing suit area, thing like that. He paid the fellow a huge bunk and the director of the camp. You, is at camp and might not have the the appointed camp staff will be there to amount of money to get professional the parent, should feel confi dent in the 6use of a phone to call you about help comfort your child through the trau- psychological services, and that was used course of the conversation that the staff anything. This is necessary for healthy matic experience. against him too. His acts of goodness has your best interests at heart. If your development of independence; however, If you see something, say and kindness go far beyond this scope, child has any issue, his/her counselor if your child does feel a crisis is brew- something. Your child and his devastation was not that he had must be made aware of the situation. ing, you must make sure there is some 10might have seen an inap- to appear in countless, fraudulent court Should the counselor make your child avenue for communication. Make sure propriate behavior and might not be so battles, but that this fully-grown adult feel unheard, take the issue to the head the camp allows a lifeline for these situa- sure what to do about it. Horsing around raising a family and running a lucrative counselor. These issues could range from tions, hopefully to avert the crisis. aside, when the counselor is having a pil- business should have such bitter, shock- lost money, bullying, and all the way to Between campers. This is tricky, low fi ght or some other activity where ing memories of what should otherwise being touched inappropriately. The because there are boys and girls there is unavoidable touching by nature have been a glorious, fun summer, and counselors have been briefed on such is- 7who are meeting new people. of the game, if your child sees a coun- that his kindness toward a needy child sues. There are kids who have never been to selor walk off with a camper alone, or was so misconstrued as to end up in a Inappropriate Touching. We have sleep-away camps or camps in general. lock the door of the bunk, or any of the courtroom. My friend was exonerated, all told our children that the only They are away from their families and other behaviors mentioned above, your and what could have torn a family apart 3people allowed to touch us in our might crave closeness and friendship be- child has a responsibility to report this. made them stronger because the truth al- full torso area are parents and doctors, cause they are homesick. They put their It is pikuach nefesh and reporting could ways wins. and only with parental supervision. If arm around a shoulder of a new friend save the life of an innocent child. Again, Parents, be aware of lurking scandal in your child sees that the counselor (or an- “just like Mom and Dad do” and it com- this is not lashon ha’ra – it is lashon tov. the woods. There are victims and perpe- yone else) is going too far, tell your child forts them. Tell your child it should go However, once reported, your child must trators that will condemn your children to run to the head counselor /director no further than that. leave it alone. to the horrors of misadventure. These IMMEDIATELY. They have appropriate Appropriate touching. There are I hope all of us have a wonderful, hap- are very real worries, as real as the pros- actions in place. Reiterate that this is not some appropriate gestures that py summer full of adventures we can pect of drowning when your child is un- lashon ha’ra – this is actually lashon tov 8allow and foster genuine camara- share with our friends and family for supervised. All camp orientations discuss and a huge mitzvah. They should yell to derie, enhancing camp spirit and healthy many years to come. water safety, and now they must discuss inappropriate behavior. How can we be sure that we are send- ing our children to the correct, healthy environment where the kids can grow emotionally, physically, and spiritual- ly, and look back on camp life as I did, with great memories to share with our children? Here is a guide to share with all children, because predators of all ages can abuse the youngest children. Camps are mandated to do an orientation with their counselors, instructing them on the correct and appropriate strategies in any situation. However, all it takes is one bad apple to make a situation dangerous for your precious child. There is a booklet of safety issues and

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 29 As I See It Cynthia Zalisky Nachas achas” is such a wonder- tiles don’t react in the same way. They ful thing. It is our reason don’t volunteer what school or college “Nfor living and makes living their children attend or professions their worthwhile. Every blessing that we be- kids have. Do you know any Jewish stow on someone includes good health mother who doesn’t tell the world about and nachas from one’s family. We wish the fact that her child is going to be a doc- people the ability to receive great joy from tor? I recall the old joke of the Jewish their loved ones, especially from children mother whose son becomes President of and grandchildren. We Jews believe that the United States. While sitting at the our greatest happiness is dependent on inauguration, she turns to the person nachas from children. We feel that it is next to her and whispers, “His brother is the most important reason for our exist- a doctor.” ence. But many other cultures are not as But nachas through achievements into this as we are. I don’t know if that’s puts a lot of pressure on the children. a good or a bad thing; it’s just the fact and They become, as one put it, “nachas ma- the way it is. I suppose that is why many chines.” It may be good for the parents of us are such neurotic parents. (L-R) Melissa Zalisky, Lauren Zalisky, Cynthia Zalisky, Jonathan Zalisky, or grandparents, but is it good for the Our whole investment in life is in the Hon. Mayor Andrew Parise kids? Are we born just to please our par- quality of our children. But this can be ents? That is an awesome responsibility a slippery slope, because having blessed and probably why a lot of our young are children is to a great degree mazal and in therapy. What if we cannot cut the a brachah from Hashem. How many It is fascinating to try to comprehend mustard and don’t go to Harvard Medi- families do you know who raised their why we have accepted the meaning of nachas to be joy and pride cal School or become the greatest talmid children in the same exact way and gave them equal opportunities, only not to CONTINUED ON P. 47 have all the kids grow up to give their that I have met someone on the street parents nachas. Some of the fi nest fami- and asked innocuously how things are Cynthia Zalisky is the Executive Director of the Queens Jewish Community. She can lies have had to deal with this heartache. and got an earful from them bragging be contacted at [email protected] I cannot count the number of times about their kids and grandchildren. Gen-

30 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 31 32 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Financially Forward Gerald Harris Outsmarting Supermarkets

headline on the Drudge Report • Always shop after eating, or at least website last week said that the after snacking; never shop when hungry. Aprices of meat, chicken, fi sh, and • Reach to the back to get the freshest eggs soared to all-time highs. If the price items. “Smart retailers always have the of luxuries goes through the roof that’s oldest items in front or on top, since they not such a problem, because most of us need to get rid of them more quickly,” can manage very nicely without those. says Mike Tesler, President of Retail Con- But when the basic food items we need cepts. to feed our families become so expen- • Value packs are not always what sive, that’s a different matter. they appear to be; smaller packages may While there’s nothing consumers can have a better per unit price than larger do about the prices stores charge, they packages do. can stretch their dollars by better under- • Limit your shopping to one trip a standing how supermarkets try to make week. us spend more and avoiding those traps. marketing strategies manipulate oth- Getting to the dairy section without • Shop mid-week to avoid crowds and er customers, even those with strong stocking up on all kinds of unneeded the slower passage through aisles those How Supermarkets Think will power and short shopping lists, items may be the most diffi cult challenge encompass. A lot of shoppers go to the supermar- into spending more money than they for shoppers, since the dairy section usu- • Half of the average household’s an- ket for just a few items, yet an hour later planned to. ally is all the way in the back of the store. nual 460 pounds of food waste is fresh their shopping carts are full of products “Two thirds of what we buy in the su- That means having to walk past many produce; therefore, buy only what you they hadn’t thought about buying and permarket we had no intention of buy- tasty products just to get a container of intend to use immediately; leftovers others that they don’t need – and the bill ing,” says shopping expert Paco Under- milk or a package of cheese. It’s no sur- should be frozen when possible. is out of sight. hill, author of Why We Buy: The Science prise that many shoppers do impulse • Some 80% of families splurge on How could this happen so often to so of Shopping. “Supermarkets are not only buying along the way. boxed cereals and fl avored oatmeal pack- many people? aware of this but encourage it.” Cooking and baking items, as well as ets. While these may be tasty, they cost The answer is that supermarkets are Typically, someone who needs just canned goods, are often located in the as much as three times more than plain very clever. Their business is not just pas- three items – bread, milk and eggs – has center of the store; here, too, the logic oatmeal or eggs. sively selling food off of shelves, but also to walk to three different ends of the is to get shoppers to walk down more • Color enhancers used to make pro- drawing in customers, keeping them in store to gather them. That’s not a coinci- aisles. duce more appealing may also make the store as long as possible, and encour- dence, as the shopper is tempted to add When the shopper fi nally reaches the them rot faster. Consider buying organic aging them to spend money. many additional items while walking cashier, he or she usually has to wait be- produce when possible. According to world-renowned brand down many aisles. hind at least one or two customers who • Take advantage of products on sale to got there fi rst. During this time the shop- whatever extent possible. per can choose from a variety of choco- Don’t expect food prices to become in- Always shop after eating, or at least after snacking; late bars, candy bars, gum, magazines, expensive any time soon. But knowing and related items. This gives shoppers the best times to shop, the best way to never shop when hungry the feeling that he or she is not simply avoid unnecessary items, and how to lim- waiting on a line but using the time it your time in the supermarket can save constructively to choose which of these a surprising amount of money. expert Martin Lindstrom, “Every extra Welcome, Dear Shopper items to buy. This section is usually the Sources: realsimple.com; minute (the supermarket) gets you to stay Often, the very fi rst thing shoppers see most profi table one for the supermarket. the secrets behind your grocery; in the store is not to make you feel more when they walk into a supermarket is a rachelraymag.com; readersdigest.com; comfortable or happier. It’s to make the section of fresh, colorful fl owers and re- How To Save Money YouTube: How Do Supermarkets money in your wallet go into the retail- lated items. This is not the supermarket’s The following are some specifi c ideas Play Tricks on You?; er’s wallet.” way of putting out the red carpet; neither for saving money at the supermarket: Supermarket Psychology. The design and layout of supermarkets do they have plans to go into the fl oral are planned by experts who use very so- business. Rather, they’re aware that fl ow- Gerald Harris is a fi nancial and feature writer. Gerald can be reached at geraldhrs@ phisticated marketing techniques to do ers stimulate the senses and convey the yahoo.com exactly that. Some of those are obvious; idea of “fresh.” others are subtle. All are hard to resist. Whether the shopper has bought For example, some stores have actu- fl owers or not, he or she has already been ally added speed bumps on the fl oors “warmed up” for making purchases in the to get shoppers to slow down their carts next section: the produce department. and thereby take notice of the different Another ploy stores use to encourage products and specials. Others play a very buying in the produce department is realistic sound of steaks sizzling on a grill enhancing the color of products like ap- for the shoppers in the meat section in- ples and bananas, as the enhanced color stead of the usual store music. And shop- schemes of the variety of fruits and veg- ping carts are oversized – 40% larger than etables make them more attention-grab- they were ten years ago – to make shop- bing and appetizing. pers feel uncomfortable going to the ca- Fresh bakery items also are located shier with just a few items. near the entrance so that everyone who The ideal customers are those who walks in will immediately smell the aro- walk into the store feeling hungry, who ma of freshly baked goods. “The bakery have had a hard day, and who will relax gets your salivary glands going,” says Un- by adding products to their carts. These derhill, “This makes you feel hungry, and shoppers are already in the mood to the hungrier you are when you shop the spend money. But clever and effective more food you will buy.”

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 33 34 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 35 Community Snapshots Photo Credits: Yaakov Katz ‘Night of Unity and Prayer’ at Yeshivas Ohr HaChaim on behalf of the three kidnapped boys in Israel Kew Gardens Hills, Saturday night, June 21 Event was co-sponsored by CHAZAQ and Chickens for Shabbos

Rabbi Yoel Schonfeld Rabbi Dovid Harris Rabbi Igal Haimoff

Rabbi Binyamin Lavian Congresswoman Grace Meng HaRav Peretz Steinberg Rosh Yeshiva HaRav Doniel Lander speaking

Yaakov Katz is a Queens-based photographer specializing in bar mitzvahs, bris milahs, family portraits, and corporate dinners. Yaakov is an on-location photographer, who works in Queens, Brooklyn, and the Five Towns. He can be reached at [email protected] or through his website www.yaakovkatzstudios.com. 36 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Community Snapshots Photo Credits: Yaakov Katz

Yaakov Katz is a Queens-based photographer specializing in bar mitzvahs, bris milahs, family portraits, and corporate dinners. Yaakov is an on-location photographer, who works in Queens, Brooklyn, and the Five Towns. He can be reached at [email protected] or through his website www.yaakovkatzstudios.com. 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 37 38 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 “Bring Back Our Boys”: New York City Offi cials Stand In Solidarity With Israel After The Kidnapping Of Three Jewish Teenagers In Israel

Rep. Charles B. Rangel addresses the media New York City Comptroller Scott M. Stringer addresses the media out- Ambassador Ido Aharoni, Consul General of Israel in New York, outside the Manhattan Municipal Building side the Manhattan Municipal Building. addresses the media outside the Manhattan Municipal Building

By Jared Feldschreiber prime minister. “You’ll remember that kidnapping in a statement delivered be- Gilad Shaar’s aunt Lihi told the Jew- Israel warned the international commu- fore foreign ministers of Muslim states ish Journal of Los Angeles that she “can’t ew York City Comptroller Scott nity about the dangers of endorsing the gathered in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia. even imagine what [her nephew is] going M. Stringer joined a slew of Fatah-Hamas unity pact. I believe the “The missing settlers in the West Bank through. He’s supposed to do homework, Nelected offi cials outside the Mu- dangers of that pact should now be abun- are human beings like us, and we must to make cake, not to deal with … it’s too nicipal Building in Lower Manhattan last dantly clear to all,” Netanyahu added. look for them and return them to their crazy,” she said. Wednesday to demand the immediate re- The prime minister met with the ab- families,” Abbas said. Hamas leaders, At last week’s press conference, Am- lease of three abducted Jewish teenagers. ducted boys’ families last Friday. while denying involvement, praised the bassador Ido Aharoni, the Consul Gen- Gilad Shaar, Naftali Fraenkel, and Eyal “We have deployed additional forces terror attack. eral of Israel in New York told approxi- Yifrach were last seen at Yeshiva Mekor to the fi eld, and we are investing a tre- “If Abbas sits at the Arab League and mately two hundred advocates and press Chaim in Gush Etzion on June 12 before mendous effort to bring the boys home… says that the kidnapping is a bad thing, members, “There are three families and terrorists kidnapped them. The nation lends you its strength, and that’s courageous,” said Lapid. “[The Pal- an entire nation whose sons have been Israel has pointed to Hamas, the terror you return that strength,” the prime min- estinian Authority] are starting to under- kidnapped. All of Israel’s resources are organization that controls the Gaza Strip, ister told the parents, as reported by The stand that unity [with Hamas] was a mis- committed to bringing Naftali, Gilad, and for responsibility for the abduction. The Times of Israel. take. This mistake can be rectifi ed.” Eyal back home.” Jewish State has since waged sweeping Outgoing President Shimon Peres also Naftali Fraenkel is a dual Israeli-Ameri- Ambassador Aharoni acknowledged and thorough raids throughout the West reached out and met with the families can citizen and has family in both Brook- the uniform sign of support from New Bank, all the while arresting Palestinians last Thursday. lyn and upstate New York. His mother York and its city offi cials. “We thank you who may have terrorist ties. The current for your unwavering display of solidari- campaign, deemed Operation Brother’s ty, your thoughts, and your prayers. To- Keeper, also seeks to severely weaken “I haven’t prayed for six years. gether, we pray for a swift and safe return Hamas’ presence and terror capabilities When the story of your sons broke, I looked through home for Naftali, Gilad, and Eyal.” in the West Bank. Charles Rangel, the US Representative “These three teens were walking home the entire house searching for my grandfather’s siddur. for New York’s 13th congressional district, from school, as so many of our children I sat and prayed,” Yair Lapid told the boys’ parents added, “My thoughts and prayers are do every day, when they were taken in a with the families of the teens as I sin- despicable act of cowardice. As a father cerely hope that the authorities can work of two young boys of my own, I can’t “We are one nation, we are one family, Rachel granted a television interview swiftly together to ensure their safe re- imagine the heartbreak these families are and I want you to know that all of Israel with CNN over the weekend in an effort turn home. As a longtime friend of Israel, going through right now,” Stringer said at is with you during these diffi cult times,” to raise international attention. I remain committed to supporting efforts the noon press conference. President Peres told them, according to “Everybody’s working under the as- in Congress that are conducive to foster- “This kidnapping is an outrageous af- his offi ce. sumption that they are alive. Beyond ing peace and stability in the region.” front to the diplomatic and peacekeep- “Three families like this can lift up a that we don’t know much. At this point Rabbi Michael S. Miller, Executive Vice ing efforts in the region. New Yorkers nation to heights previously unknown, we are all geared towards fi nding the President and CEO of the JCRC-NY, also stand with the people of Israel, and lead- and I’m not exaggerating. It’s been sev- boys,” Rachel Fraenkel told CNN’s Ben condemned the kidnapping. “We stand ers around the world, in condemning eral days that Israel is different: [It is] Wedeman. “The professionals are doing together with our local and national lead- this act and praying for Gilad, Naftali, and unifi ed, joined, praying, fi ghting,” added everything they can. As far as my energy ers, as well as those around the world, Eyal’s safe return.” President Peres. – I haven’t been eating much or sleeping who have unequivocally condemned The three Israeli teenagers were last Finance Minister Yair Lapid also met much – I can’t deal with that. I just want this heinous act. We call on those who seen hitchhiking down a road in Gush with the families, and the Yesh Atid lead- to fi nd the boys,” she added. have yet to do so to add their voices in Etzion. Reports surfaced that investi- er told them he has recently turned to Yishai Fraenkel, Naftali’s uncle, said condemning the abduction. Those who gators said signals were sent from their prayer. the three kidnapped boys were still alive are responsible for this brutal act of ter- phones just minutes before the abduc- “I haven’t prayed for six years. Since according to information given to the rorism must be found and brought to jus- tion, which occurred on a road not far the bar mitzvah of my son I haven’t been families by security forces, as reported by tice,” said Rabbi Miller. from Hebron. in a synagogue. When the story of your Channel 2 in Israel. In a statement released by her offi ce, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu sons broke, I looked through the entire “Of course, I can’t tell you anything, Queens Borough President Melinda Katz has said from the outset that Hamas had house searching for my grandfather’s but I can say that the indications we’re re- said, “The abduction of the three Israeli been behind the abduction. siddur. I sat and prayed,” Lapid told the ceiving – on the basis of intelligence and students needs to be condemned by all “Hamas terrorists carried out Thurs- boys’ parents. not just religious faith – is that the boys who are watching. My thoughts and day’s kidnapping of three Israeli teen- For his part, Palestinian President are alive,” Fraenkel was quoted as saying agers. We know that as fact,” said the Mahmoud Abbas has condemned the in a radio interview. CONTINUED ON P. 53

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 39 Huckabee In The Holy Land Fox News commentator, former Arkansas governor, shows solidarity with families of abducted teens

Showing solidarity with the families of the recently abducted Israeli and American teens. R A private audience with Israeli Chief (Sephardic) Rabbi Yosef Yitshak. From L to R: Dr. Joe to L: Israeli Chief (Ashkenazi) Rabbi David Lau; Israel activist Yisroel Stefansky; Fox News Frager, Mr. Daryl Hagler, Chief Rabbi Yosef, Dr. Alan Berger (partially obscured), Gov. Mike commentator Mike Huckabee; Dr. Paul Brody; Mayor Martin Oliner, Lawrence, NY. The buttons Huckabee, Mr. Yisroel Stefansky, MK R’ Nissim Ze’ev, Dr. Paul Brody, Mr. Daniel Luria, Mr. Mati read: “BRING OUR BOYS HOME” Dan (founder of Ateret Cohanim)

By Daniel Perez Frankel, where Gov. Huckabee offered er, Dr. Paul Brody, and Mrs. Odelya the Muslim Quarter, the Huckabee (with photos by Itsik Nisim) words of hope and encouragement to Jacobs—toured the Old Jewish Quar- delegation had private audiences with the boy’s beleaguered family. The rest ter (better known as the Muslim Quar- Israel’s Ashkenazi and Sephardi Chief n the realm of US -Israeli relations, of Huckabee’s fact-fi nding tour, under ter) of Jerusalem’s Old City. While Rabbis, David Lau and Yitzhak Yosef. where comforting platitudes are the aegis of Ateret Cohanim (an organ- there, the delegation stopped at two Looking quite at home in a yarmulke Ia dime a dozen, rare is the leader ization dedicated to the redemption, recent Ateret Cohanim acquisitions: decked out with Israeli and American who will go beyond mere lip service by Jews, of Arab-owned real estate Beit Zion (a mechina, or preparatory fl ags, Gov. Huckabee discussed the and actually act on his convictions. in Jerusalem and other Jewish holy academy for Religious Zionist high recent abductions with Chief Rabbi Mike Huckabee, it seems, is one such Lau, and the lack of a response from leader. The former Arkansas governor the American public: “I think it’s very and presidential candidate is also “It’s important that we get the truth,” declared Huckabee. tragic that there hasn’t been more a lifelong friend of the Jewish state, attention, but as people do [learn] having visited dozens of times over “Truth is the best friend that Israel has.” about it, it’s touching a nerve. the last four decades. Guided by his “It’s one thing,” said Huckabee, “if faith (Huckabee is an ordained South- people hear that three Israeli soldiers ern Baptist minister), the governor sites), is being focused on the chal- school grads prior to their army ser- have been kidnapped or captured. has been unwavering in his support lenges facing Jews in East Jerusalem, vice), and Beit Wittenberg, an apart- That gets our attention, but this hits of the Jewish claim to the entire Land Judea, and Samaria, as well as the ment once owned by former Prime our hearts very differently. When a of Israel, despite the ever-shifting threat of anti-Israel delegitimization Minister Ariel Sharon as an assertion person who is American hears this winds of popular opinion. efforts such as the BDS movement. of the right of Jews to settle anywhere story, they don’t react as an American, This week’s visit to Israel came with On Monday morning (June 26), in Israel’s capital. The Wittenberg they don’t react as a Zionist. I’m both, a particular sense of urgency, with his Huckabee and his delegation—as- House, it has recently been discov- [but] I react as a father.” fi rst stop being the home of Israeli- sembled largely through the efforts ered, is also the site of the 19th century Both chief rabbis gave Huckabee American teenage abductee Naftali of American activists Dr. Joseph Frag- Mediterranean Hotel, where Mark their blessing, thanking the governor Twain stayed on his famed sojourn to for his efforts at bringing knowledge the Holy Land. of the present crisis to the American Briefi ng Mike Huckabee and his public. colleagues of East Jerusalem’s exten- The meeting with Israel’s top rabbis sive Jewish history, Ateret Cohanim’s was brief, and followed immediately Daniel Luria pointed out that 5,000 of by a special caucus in the country’s the Muslim Quarter’s 35,000 residents parliament on the topic of combat- are Jewish. Moreover: “One doesn’t ing the delegitimization of the Jewish have to be a genius to recognize that state. The dignitaries in attendance there is no such concept of Arab East are to numerous to recount here, but Jerusalem anymore. There are 250,000 included Knesset Members such as R’ Jews living in what the world says is Nissim Ze’ev (of Shas, who arranged ‘East Jerusalem.’ the assembly and was also present “The world is treading water when for the audience with the chief rab- it says we’re going to divide Jerusa- bis), R’ Dov Lipman (Yesh Atid), Moshe lem,” he added. Following their whirlwind tour of CONTINUED ON P. 41

Chief Rabbi David Lau shares a personal story with media personality and former (/future?) Daniel Perez is a freelance writer and media consultant based in New York City. He presidential candidate Mike Huckabee, who has donned a patriotic kippah for the occasion; can be reached at [email protected], and you can follow him on Twitter: @ June 23, 2014. PerezFreelance.

40 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Knesset went to Poland that day, to stand in victory on the very grounds that had been intended for their de- feat. “And I thought of what is said in the Old Testament (sic), that as Joseph said to his brothers ‘What you intend- ed for my harm has turned out for good.’ And sometimes we forget that even those things which are intended for harm cannot stop G-d’s greater purpose.” “There are those who wish harm upon Israel,” Huckabee continued, “that’s undeniable. There are those who would love for Israel to not exist. Visiting Beit Zion, a mechina (IDF prep academy for Religious Zionists) in East Jerusalem. From L to R: Dr. Joe Frager (Executive Council Chair- And some of the most vicious, some man - American Friends of Ateret Cohanim), Daniel Luria (Executive Director of Ateret Cohanim), Gov. Mike Huckabee, Ruth Lieberman (CEO, of the most violent acts in human his- Jaffe Strategies), GOP activist Dr. Alan Berger, Dr. Paul Brody (Executive Council Member - American Friends of Ateret Cohanim), Morton Klein tory, have been targeted towards Isra- (ZOA President) el and a nation and the Jewish people as a whole. CONTINUED FROM P. 40 Speaking about the threat posed Feiglin’s address, Gov. Huckabee ex- “Some of the acts are irrational. by a nuclear Iran, Frager declared that plained his principled support for Is- How else can one describe the BDS Feiglin (Likud), Ayelet Shaked (Jewish it would ultimately fall upon Israel rael. In his usual down-to-earth style, movement, other than that it’s irra- Home), and Speaker of the Knesset to act. Addressing the Israeli delega- Huckabee referred of his experience tional? To punish Israel because it is Yuli Edelstein, as well as numerous tion, he said “I wish I could say that waiting in line as he passed through a democracy? Because it does allow cabinet members such as Minister the president of the United States Israeli Customs, connecting it to his women the opportunity to have equal of Strategic and Intelligence Affairs would be there for you and make it relationship with Israel in general. “It rights? Because it does give equal Yuval Steinitz, Housing and Construc- easy. I think he’ll come around, but is typical,” said Huckabee, “that when wages and benefi ts in companies like tion Minister Uri Ariel, and Deputy fi rst you’ve got to jump into the ‘Yam I get in a line, I look for the short one, SodaStream … and they’re actually cre- Defense Minister Danny Danon. Also Suf,’ [Sea of Reeds; a reference to the but it always takes longer. When peo- ating jobs for people, it doesn’t mat- present was Yonah Lloyd, president Exodus -ed.] and then the waters will ple always ask me ‘Why are you so ter who they are? If that’s something of SodaStream, whose company was part.” supportive of Israel?’ well … it seems that the world thinks that it needs thrust into the BDS limelight when MK Feiglin also expressed the no- like there are always very long lines to divest from, then we have a crazy celebrity Scarlett Johansson refused tion that the State of Israel must take of people who are ready to condemn world. But we do, and we have some to be intimidated by anti-Israel activ- responsibility for its own well-being, Israel, who are ready to criticize Is- very crazy people who are launching ists into dropping a spokesmanship and not rely on the largesse of others. rael, even annihilate Israel. The line these initiatives.” deal with the company, even leaving Feiglin spoke of the common ground to stand with this unique country— “It’s important that we get the her position as global ambassador for he shared with Huckabee, stating sim- whose only explanation for existence truth,” declared Huckabee. “Truth is Oxfam over the matter. Other speak- ply: “I believe in G-d.” He went on to in the modern world is G-d’s provi- the best friend that Israel has.” ers at the event included ZOA Presi- explain that there is no legitimacy dence—the line to stand with Israel The Fox News commentator went dent Mort Klein, Lawrence NY Mayor to Israel without G-d as a key factor. is a very short one; and since I always on to lament the abundance of false- (and RZA Chairman) Martin Oliner, Taking perhaps the most radical posi- like to get in the short line, I don’t hood generated by Israel’s enemies in and Ken Abramowitz of NGN Capital tion among his colleagues in one re- mind being at the very front of that their efforts to take legitimacy away and Chairman of American Friends of spect, Feiglin called for an end to US line.” from the Jewish state. He denounced Likud. aid (military and monetary) to Israel. The governor regaled the Israeli the so-called “Two-State Solution” Representing the American Friends “We don’t need it,” declared Feiglin. dignitaries with the story of his visit as unworkable insofar as it assumes of Ateret Cohanim, Dr. Joseph Frager Instead, said the Israeli lawmaker, this year to Auschwitz on Holocaust that both parties are acting in good lauded Mike Huckabee as Israel’s “best the relationship between Israel and Remembrance Day, noting, “I went faith, when the Palestinian leadership friend in America.” He went on to de- the United States should be based on there at my own expense because I clearly is not. Huckabee concluded by scribe America’s non-Jewish friends of shared values, e.g. freedom and re- believed that it was going to be an ex- recounting his time with the Fran- Israel as an important source of chi- spect for human rights. traordinary opportunity to show soli- kels, expressing admiration for their zuk (i.e. moral support). Dovetailing quite naturally with darity, as a number of members of the strength and courage, and reiterating his previous statements that whoever is behind these horrendous acts, if the teens are not returned immediately and unharmed, will “have hell to pay.” The Knesset caucus was followed by a dinner reception at the Leonardo Plaza Hotel, which included many dig- nitaries from the day’s proceedings, as well as Chagai Ben-Artzi (brother- in-law of Prime Minister Netanyahu), noted expert on US-Israeli relations Amb. (ret.) Yoram Ettinger, former MK Dr. Aryeh Eldad, Women in Green co- chair Nadia Matar, Efrat Mayor Oded Revivi, and Ateret Cohanim executive council member Robert Koppel, who introduced Foreign Affairs and De- fense Committee Chairman MK Ze’ev Elkin. As of this writing, the Huckabee At the Knesset’s Special Caucus to Combat Delegitimization of Israel as a Jewish State, June 23, 2014. L to R: (Front Row) MK R’ Nissim Ze’ev; Gov. Mike Huckabee; Dr. Joe Frager, Executive Council Chairman - American Friends of Ateret Cohanim; Morton Klein, President - Zionist delegation is scheduled to visit the Organization of America; (Back Row) GOP activist Dr. Alan Berger; Mrs. Odelya Jacobs (media coordinator for the Huckabee delegation); Dr. SodaStream factory in “Occupied Paul Brody, Executive Council Member - American Friends of Ateret Cohanim; Martin Oliner, Mayor of Lawrence, NY, and chairman - Religious West Bank,” and several other sites of Zionists of America; Doug Altabef, executive council member - Im Tirtzu; Yonah Lloyd, President of SodaStream; Rabbi Sholom Dov-Ber Wolpo, Jewish interest on both sides of the Director - Gush Katif Museum. Green Line.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 41 42 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Our First Priority Rabbi Shaya Cohen 10 Points To Help Understand Our Youth In Order To Unlock Their Great Potential

There is overwhelming and endless exposure to Since everyone is so busy, and so much loved, as their counterparts did in a previous genera- temptation. is going on outside the family, they tion, where the central focus of parents’ lives was 1 There exists extensive parental and yes- 10don’t get the attention they need to feel their family. hivah pressure to be perfect and fi t one 2mold, with undue concern for what the neighbors, friends, etc. will think, rather than what is in the best interest of our youth. There is the image of overwhelming income- earning responsibilities of parents and teachers. 3Parents both work out of the house, and teachers run from job to job, both generating a sense of not hav- ing enough time for being involved in our youth’s lives and problems.

Our youth are often made to feel a lack of validity, which causes them understandably to be unhappy

Our youth is exposed to many inconsistencies on the part of the adult generation. It often does not 4practice what it preaches. Our youth does not see great passion for Torah learning and observance. 5 The emphasis on materialism has a nega- tive effect. Materialism seems to be more 6important than spirituality and religious development. Even religiously, everything seems so ma- terialistic, e.g., material covering the dining-room table, material of hat or head covering material of clothing, hairstyle, etc. Youth growing up in a sophisticated and secular- ized world have many questions. They often feel 7that their questions are not welcome and often ignored. Growing up in a very free society where almost anything goes, the restrictions of Torah seem 8harsh unless our youth can understand and see their benefi ts in a very down-to-earth way. They don’t feel that they are being given the understanding of a rel- evant benefi cial result in the here and now. Benefi ts in the next world are too far away. Happiness is a result of feeling and being validat- ed. How valid can our youth feel if they are con- 9stantly criticized and put down by parents, teach- ers, and the religious community in general? They are often made to feel a lack of validity, which causes them understandably to be unhappy. If they are unhappy in their environment, they wish to get away.

Rabbi Shaya Cohen is the Rosh HaYeshiva of Yeshiva Zichron Aryeh and Kollel Ner Yehoshua for over twen- ty years. Before that, he founded Valley Torah High School in Los Angeles and served as its dean for a dec- ade. Rabbi Cohen founded Priority-1 in 1987 to help at-risk teenagers and their parents and families. Its workshops and events have taught thousands of par- ents and educators to inspire children to a lifelong love of Torah and Yiddishkeit. Rabbi Cohen can be reached at 516-295-5700, and Priority-1 resources are available online at www.priority-1.org.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 43 Home Health Care Corner Tania Hammer at Caring Professionals Brain Activity And Neuroplacticity

ast week we discussed the brain. It We are likely to be involved in different learning throughout life to keep your think of chronic stress as the opposite of is a singular organ of our body yet types of mentally stimulating activities at brain sharp and reduce your risk of exer cise: It pre vents the cre ation of new Lwe can’t see or feel it. I explained different stages of our life. No matter what dementia. neurons. different parts of the brain and differ- your age, and whether you are studying, Thrive on learning and mental chal- ent types of trauma and injury as well as working, or retired, exercising your brain Do Brain Training Games lenges. The point of having a brain is pre- natural decline in the brain. This week, I can help reduce your risk of developing And Programs Reduce Dementia Risk? cisely to learn and to adapt to challeng ing develop a few strategies, with the help of dementia. A number of brain training programs new envi ron ments. Once new neu rons a couple of websites, like wikipedia.com Formal education, working, or running are now available. There is evidence for appear in your brain, where in your brain and sharpbrain.com, that will help you a family can keep your brain very active. some of these programs that they can they stay and how long they sur vive keep your brain fresh. What you do in your leisure time can improve the cognitive functions that the depend on how you use them. “Use it Neuroplasticity, also known as also help. If you are retired, you should program is designed to train. There is or lose it” does not mean “Do crossword brain plasticity, refers to changes think about new ways to give your brain evidence that some programs might also puz zle number 1,234,567.” It means, “Chal- in neural pathways and synapses a regular workout. There are many, many slightly improve general brain function. lenge your brain often with fun da men- that are due to changes in behavior, activities that involve mental stimulation But we have no evidence yet that any brain tally new activities.” environment and neural processes, as Aim high. And keep learning. Once you well as changes resulting from bodily become too comfort able in one activity, injury. Neuroplasticity has replaced the The brain only weighs 2% of body mass but consumes fi nd a new one. The brain keeps devel op- formerly-held position that the brain over 20% of the oxy gen and nutri ents we intake ing, refl ecting what you do with it. is a physiologically static organ, and Explore, travel. Adapting to new loca- explores how – and in which ways – the tions forces you to pay more attention to brain changes throughout life. and challenge. You could try: training game or program can reduce the your envi ron ment. How much and what type of mental A hobby such as painting, carpentry, risk of dementia. Make your own decisions, and mis- activity do you need to do to reduce metal work, sewing, craft, or collecting Let’s review some good lifestyle options takes. And learn from them. That way, you your risk of dementia? The research A short course such as woodwork, we can fol low to maintain, and improve, are re-training your brain. evidence to date suggests that any gardening, computers, cooking, our vibrant brains. Develop and maintain stim u lat ing activity that involves thinking and mechanics, or yoga Care for your nutri tion. Did you know friend ships. We are “social animals” and learning may be benefi cial for brain Reading different styles of books, that the brain only weighs 2% of body need social inter ac tion. health and protecting against dementia. newspapers, or magazines mass but con sumes over 20% of the oxy- Laugh often, especially to cog ni tively The evidence also suggests that greater Writing poetry, essays, or keeping a gen and nutrients we intake? As a gen- com plex humor, full of twists and sur- benefi t comes from more complex diary eral rule, you don’t need expensive ultra- prises. and challenging mental activities. The Doing jigsaw, crossword, number, or sophisticated nutritional sup ple ments; For three minutes a day, and not more more brain activities you do, the more word puzzles just make sure you don’t stuff your self or less, write with your non-dominant frequently you do them, and the more Playing board games or cards with junk! hand. Copy out a list or something from complex the activity, the lower your Learning to dance, play an instrument, Remem ber that the brain is part of the the daily paper. Anything will do. It will risk of dementia is likely to be. or speak a new language body. Things that exer cise your body can be really funny at fi rst, then frustrating. Going to the theatre, movies, museum, also help sharpen your brain: Phys i cal Do not give up so fast. For three minutes Choose Activities That You Enjoy gallery, or a concert exer cise enhances neurogenesis. a day of this concentration, you will keep Choose activities that challenge your Cooking a new recipe or building a Prac tice posi tive, future-oriented the brain cells surprisingly alert. brain and give you enjoyment as well. model thoughts until they become your default Prac tic e a bit every day until small If you try to do something that you fi nd Joining a club or community group, or mind set and that you look forward to steps snowball into unstoppable, internal- very diffi cult or boring, you may become volunteering every new day in a con struc tive way. ized habits; start improving at least one frustrated or stressed, and this is not Researching something you’re Stress and anx i ety, no matter whether of these habits today. Revisit the habit healthy for your brain. interested in on the Internet or at your induced by external events or by your above that really grabbed your atten tion, With many mentally stimulating local library own thoughts, actually kills neurons and and make a decision to try something dif- activities, you can start at an easier level Even having a chat with a friend about pre vent the creation of new ones. You can fer ent today! and move to more challenging levels as current affairs involves brain exercise. you get better with practice. This also Choose activities that you enjoy, and Tania Hammer is a community activist and a social networker for Caring Profession- helps you include new learning in your try to include lots of variety to exercise als, a home care agency in Brooklyn and Queens. For more information on any home- routine, which is important for building different parts of your brain. care-related topic, please call Shabsi at 718-897-2273 (ext. 171). Tania can be reached at your brain reserve. Challenge yourself often, and keep [email protected].

that this Intellect created laws devoid us with their criticism of our philosophy. Faith And The Unknowable of reason or meaning. Rather, we must Yet, modern science is showing that Is- believe that the reason behind the laws rael’s philosophy of recognizing the lim- CONTINUED FROM P. 14 ing is incomplete, because some truths is beyond human understanding at this its of reason and the acceptance of the are unprovable. The overconfi dence in stage in our development. unknowable is more harmonious with civilization. In fact, many mathemati- reason known as rationalism has placed The Vilna Gaon compared this con- contemporary scientists than the previ- cians today use mathematics to show upon logic and mathematics, law and cept to looking at a globe and seeing that ous simplistic philosophy of rationalism that mathematics itself has limitations. morality, demands for consistency and one tiny dot represents an entire country. that prevailed until the 20th Century. The Kurt Gödel demonstrated that there are completeness that can never be satisfi ed. We see only a dot but the reality has nu- submission to a Higher Intellect makes certain true statements that may not be Thus, a perfectly understood universe is merous details, activity, color, and dimen- us more humble before the Creator and proved using the rules of mathematical beyond our reach. sions that are not visible in the globe. more “scientifi c” regarding the true na- logic (Scientifi c American, March 2006). This is the message of the Torah. The Similarly, every mitzvah is like a little dot: ture of the Universe. This is the message In general, modern science is altering the mitzvoth have reasons; it is just that we All we see is the tiny representation of an that Israel delivers to the world: Accept- simple assumption that Man is capable of cannot comprehend some of them. The infi nite universe that is beyond our intel- ing that you do not know everything en- understanding everything and that Rea- Torah emanates from a Supreme Intelli- lect or imagination. larges you and connects you to a Higher son has its limits. Our system of reason- gence, and therefore it is inconceivable Rashi said that the nations “torment” Being.

44 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 45 Parenting Simply Adina Soclof Good Parenting: Know The Importance Of Play dults sometimes underestimate assembles them in a new way, either the importance of play for chil- in art, a story, or a game, that child is Adren. They often think of it as developing creative abilities that will a waste of time that achieves nothing prove invaluable throughout life. of importance for the child. However, Sadly, a number of things may many realize that human beings do get in the way of children playing. much of their learning through play, One of these is television. Watch- especially children who learn best ing television is an entirely inactive when they are having fun. Play helps and non-participatory activity that, children develop into healthy and pro- unlike play, may waste an enormous ductive adults. percentage of children’s daily lives. The best form of play varies from The average child spends more than child to child, but the goal of play an entire day each week passive- is always the same: Have fun. From ly watching television. These are birth, humans begin playing with hours that can be much better spent wriggles as a newborn to construct- interacting with others, reading, cre- ing houses with little wooden blocks ating, imagining, and of course play- as toddlers. With maturity, our imag- ing. Even the best TV educational inations become our most power- programming is not as effective as ful tool when playing. We may set simple play in developing a child’s mind. up complex rules for games, create When a child skips rope or swings on monkey bars, that child is developing motor skills and puppet shows, or indulge in fanta- physical dexterity Another major factor that inter- sy. The importance of such play for feres with children playing is the children can be seen in many ways. understanding of the structure of lan- dren play, they understand that so- adults in their lives. Children are Even though the purpose of a child’s guage. Reasoning out problems and cial rules exist and that they need to frequently over-managed and over- playtime is to have fun, play also developing game plans also expand conform to interact successfully with whelmed by the expectations of provides tangible benefi ts such as cognitive abilities, allowing children others. adults. From their school schedule enhanced and accelerated develop- to gauge what is important and what A great deal of a child’s play takes and afterschool programs to sports ment. When a child skips rope or is not in any situation. Central to the place in the mind. Playing is about teams and family commitments, vir- swings on monkey bars, that child is importance of play is that it allows abstract ideas and concepts. Few tually every moment of the child’s developing motor skills and physical children to plan, create strategies, things are more powerful and helpful day may be highly structured by par- dexterity. When children kick a ball and select from a range of choices in the development of a child’s mind ents or caretakers. However, adults across the playground, they are devel- while working toward a goal. than the ability to indulge in fanta- who understand the importance of oping coordination and improving Another important benefi t of play sy role-playing and similar games. play for children encourage unstruc- balance. When children play with is improved social skills. These in- When a child takes abstract ideas, tured time for “unmanaged” play — a pickup sticks or draw with crayons, clude communication skills and the imagery, and other components and gift of a lifetime. they are learning to manipulate small ability to cooperate with others. objects and are perfecting their fi ne How else can children learn about Adina Soclof, a certifi ed Speech Pathologist, worked as a Speech Pathologist in pre- motor skills. teamwork and cooperation early in schools for the developmentally disabled in the New York area. She then worked as Children also improve their lin- life if not with play? In the process, a Parent Educator for Bellefaire Jewish Children’s Bureau facilitating workshops. guistic skills while playing through children also begin to understand the She has been featured at numerous non-profi t organizations and private schools in rhymes, songs, and games built children around them, which helps Cleveland. Adina developed TEAM Communication Ventures and conducts parenting around words. All of these help a to develop empathy and a sense of and teacher workshops via telephone nationwide. For more information, visit parent- child develop vocabulary and a better camaraderie. In addition, when chil- ingsimply.com.

46 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Advertiser Spotlight: Know Your Local Business Shira Diamond Soysauce Glatt Kosher Chinese Takeout

Soysauce is one of those new Main Street additions that everyone is talking about. Chinese food is always a popular hit among adults and kids alike, and when Soysauce opened its doors, the community was abuzz. With endless choices of food to choose from, and friendly service as well, we spoke to Gavriel Borenstein, owner of Soysauce Glatt Kosher Takeout, to fi nd out more about what his store is all about.

QJL: Why did you decide to open our appreciation by offering yeshivah, up a Chinese food takeout on Main Hatzalah, and Chaverim discounts. We Street? How did you get into the take- are all in this together! out business? GB: First off, I love Chinese food, as QJL: What do you offer that sets you I’m sure we all do. When I moved to apart from other Chinese restaurants? Queens for college, I was disappointed GB: We have great lunch specials or 500 people. Most importantly, and we’ve been accepted and welcomed with the local selection in the area. I that appeal to anyone grabbing a bite this is something I’m always emphasiz- into the community. We have daily saw a need for a takeout Chinese estab- on the go, or an entire school that ing with my staff, at Soysauce you are orders from local yeshivos, Main Street lishment that focused on fast delivery needs to feed a crowd. We never charge always greeted with a smile. It is vital businesses, and the k’hilah at large. Of- and takeout, along with courteous ser- for local delivery, and we can usually that each and every customer has an ten, people stop in, place their order, vice and, of course, great food. I love get the food to the customer very fast. outstanding experience! and go next door to Seasons Supermar- this community and we deserve great No order is too big or too small… we ket for their shopping. When they’re Chinese food! It’s very important to be are always happy to take your order. QJL: What is your favorite dish? done, their food is waiting for them. part of the community, and we show We have catering options for 5 people, What’s the most popular dish? And they don’t need to worry about GB: Our most popular dish is the cooking dinner. My favorite is when General Tso Chicken. Runners-up are a local mother told me last week, “The General Zen and the Kung Fu Krunch. kids always remind me – Wednesday As far as my favorite, it has to be the night is Soysauce night!” General Tso Sub Sandwich… I’m always running around, and I can eat it on the QJL: Do you cook or do you have go. It’s our own take on Chinese-Amer- Chinese food every day? ican fusion food. It’s also very popular GB: I’ve worked in a falafel restau- with the yeshivah crowd. rant and got sick of it right away. I’ve worked in pizza and the same thing QJL: What has been the communi- happened. But this time it’s different! ty’s reaction to your opening? The menu we put together is so expan- GB: We’ve had a tremendous out- sive, with so much variety – I still ha- pouring of support from the communi- ven’t made my way through it! Every ty, and we are very pleased with how day I can taste something new.

speculate that nachas has been rede- erations.” The children were asked to Island. Mr. Parise was an American sol- Nachas fi ned because it takes a lot of effort to interview a zakein (old person) and, of dier during World War II, who, as part raise children. There are constant tri- course, one of my girls came to me with of Patton’s Army, liberated Buchenwald CONTINUED FROM P. 30 als, tribulations, boo-boos, etc. among a series of questions. One of the most Concentration Camp. That was of great the challenges that it takes to have our precious queries that my granddaughter signifi cance to my family, since my fa- chacham? Are we less a source of nachas offspring grow up properly. Kids do asked me was, “What do you want me to ther was freed from there by the heroic for our family? Shouldn’t life be more not grow up by themselves in a vacu- learn from you?” I answered that I want efforts of the American Army. than that? um (unless they were raised by wolves, her to be a caring person and reach out My family and I went to express our On the positive side, it can be a cata- which I continue to remind my chil- willingly to help fellow Jews in need. gratitude to the Mayor, because due to lyst to striving harder to achieve. A nod dren that they were). It takes an inor- My son and I seek every opportunity to his efforts and the GIs with him, three and a wink from one’s parents can be a dinate amount of time, effort, patience, have them do chesed at QJCC and else- generations of my people are living to- tremendous incentive to excel. koach (strength) and good old-fashioned where. On their off-days, they come to day. It was a very moving and special But what does nachas really mean? mazal to bear the fruit that we hope pack meals-on-wheels and help distrib- experience that my grandchildren, al- Nachas actually means rest, not pride and pray for. ute packages at our food distributions though only nine years old, will never and joy as we usually interpret it. As May and June are always a great na- before the holidays. forget. Dennis Prager noted, the real brachah of chas months. There are graduations, It is so important to raise ethical chil- Someone connected to one’s Jewish nachas is that “[w]e should have peace weddings, bar mitzvahs, etc. and, baruch dren, and we must invest time and en- past is likely to want to be connected to from our children knowing they are tak- Hashem, I have also been blessed with ergy in that process. It is imperative to the Jewish future. Parents, and grand- ing care of themselves, living a moral wonderful experiences lately that I will make children understand who they are, parents for that matter, have the primary and responsible life that includes, hope- cherish always. their importance in the family unit, and power to maintain our Jewish heritage fully, taking care of their own family and I witnessed my grandchildren’s as- the legacy from where they come. through their children and, in turn, have having a peaceful relationship with us – semblies for Yom HaShoah and Yom A very special event that my son a major impact on the family’s Jewish fu- that is what we are hoping for.” Yerushalayim, my grandson’s graduation, and his daughters participated in with ture. That is true nachas and that is what It is fascinating to try to comprehend my twin granddaughters’ participation me two weeks ago was at our meeting it really is all about. why we have accepted the meaning of in an unusual program at the Shulamith with the Hon. Andrew Parise, who is the I sincerely wish all our readers true nachas to be joy and pride. I can only School of Long Island, entitled “Gen- 90-year-old mayor of Cedarhurst, Long Yiddishe nachas.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 47 Feelin’ Funny Mordechai Schmutter Get Outta Town! his summer, if you’re looking to said please, but look, if he didn’t hear go on a vacation to get away from me, I’ll say it again. So I started over: Tit all, I would suggest going some- “I would like to pick up my rental car, where out of town. Particularly some- please. My name is Mordechai Schmut- where “out-of-town”y. ter.” And he said, “Please?” And I said, Of course, “out of town” is all a mat- “Please.” “Please?” “Please.” And he ter of perspective. To people in Brook- said, “No, I didn’t understand what you lyn, I live out of town, inasmuch as, said,” and I responded, “Oh. You didn’t when I leave the house, I don’t have to understand “please”? What part of New take into consideration whether I’m go- Jersey are you from?” ing to lose my parking spot. But I’m not Now the truth is that I made up that really out of town. In fact, I can see the story. Like I said, I wrote my whole rou- city from any hill in my neighborhood. tine before I left home, and besides, not Whereas people who actually live out a single person said, “Please?” to me the of town are thinking, “Which city?” entire three hours that I was in Cincin- Originally, I think, “out of town” nati before the event started. So I was meant that there was a town of people, starting to wonder if people in Cincin- and your house was literally in the mid- nati are the opposite of polite -- that my dle of nowhere, and there was a pret- contact had told me about the “Please?” ty good chance on any given day that thing as a joke, so I’d get up and say a you’d be eaten by wolves. Then, once whole routine, and then later they everywhere became settled, “out of could say to each other, “Remember town” started to mean “out of the town shul. With half the people, I’m still not me is that people in Cincinnati are the time that guy fl ew in from New Jer- that we personally live in,” and is gener- sure if they live here of if they’re guests more punctual. Are in-towners late to sey, and he was saying a whole routine ally said by people from bigger towns, who come to Passaic a lot. everything? I wouldn’t say that. We and no one knew what he was talking such as New York, about people from But on top of making jokes and try- just learned over the years that if you about? In towners are crazy!” smaller towns, such as anywhere that is ing not to offend anybody, I was asked try to come on time, there will be traf- But it turns out she was telling the not New York. But most people defi ne to do some stand-up comedy. fi c. So we leave later because we fi gure truth. That story got a big laugh, espe- it as an area where there aren’t enough cially the parts where I made fun of places to get pizza. New Jersey, because if you’re moving to Some people actually like living out We leave later because we figure that way we’ll get there sooner. a town with 200 families, and it takes of town. The fact that there’s no paral- We actually might pass ourselves on the way there you 12 hours to drive to your parents lel parking ever is a big draw. And those for Yom Tov, you want confi rmation people like to come into town for vaca- that you made the right choice. Also, tion, so they can spend the entire trip for some reason, New Jersey is a funny sitting in traffi c, and then come home “What should I speak about?” I asked. that way we’ll get there sooner. We ac- state to make fun of, no matter where and tell their friends, and their friends “I don’t know,” my contact said. tually might pass ourselves on the way you’re from. It’s like New York’s annoy- ask, “Traffi c? Really? What’s that like? “How about some of the differences be- there. ing little brother. Do you have pictures?” tween Cincinnati and New York?” So I came up with the following joke: And people are defi nitely polite in Life is a lot simpler out of town. So I said, “I’ve never actually been to I said, “This place is really not like New Cincinnati. Some people came over to And that’s why most people in Cincinnati. You know I’m not going to Jersey at all. For example, I notice that me afterward and said, “I can’t believe town rarely go out of town. Because write all my material after I get off the over here, everyone’s a little more… you noticed the “Please?” thing after what’s out there, really? At most, we plane, right?” punctual. Everyone’s here now! So I only a few hours in Cincinnati!” And go there to look. Also, people involved So she said, “Okay, here are some dif- hope I have enough material. I was ac- some older gentleman came over and in kashrus go to look at cows, because ferences: First of all, we’re very polite tually counting on everyone showing explained the origin of the expression. cows live mainly where there are very over here. Very out-of-towny.” (See? up at 9:30. Back where I’m from, I’d still It turns out it comes from the German few people, because of the smell. (Peo- They know.) be bothering my wife to get ready to go.” “bitteh”, which means both “please” ple do not smell great.) And that’s true. People out of town Another thing she said was that in- and “excuse me.” He said the town had I recently took a trip out of town, do tend to be more polite. Now before stead of “excuse me,” people in Cin- some German origins, like all the other when I went to Cincinnati to host a all the in-towners write me angry let- cinnati say, “Please?” With a question European explorers tried to settle near Chinese auction. Most of my job was to ters, I should explain why this is true: mark. I did think that was interesting, the ocean, and the Germans somehow announce the winners and make funny If you live in town, and you go out of because the word for “excuse me” here took a turn and ended up in Cincinnati. comments about the prizes that would town for, say, vacation, and you see an- in New Jersey, is… Well, I don’t know if But that would explain the punctuality. hopefully not offend the donors, most other frum person, even one you don’t we have a word for it. I think it’s, “Hey!” So I would defi nitely suggest going of whom were in attendance. And then know, aren’t you more likely to say hel- With an exclamation point. out of town for vacation. It’s quiet out get out of Cincinnati before they could lo? It’s like how, when you’re in a boat, So I got up at the event and said the there, except that people keep coming come after me. you’re 80% more likely to wave at other following: over and talking to you, even though And yes, Cincinnati is out of town. people in boats. (“Hey, it’s another per- “I was in the airport today, at the car you’re very clearly a guest. But that’s Okay, fi ne, so the people in Cincinnati son! I’m in a boat too! Keep an eye on rental counter, and I gave the guy my in- just Cincinnati. Maybe different cities think they’re in town. me, because I might fall in later.”) But formation, and he said “Please?” I guess will bring different experiences. I’ll No, I’m just kidding. They know in town, everyone’s thinking the same in retrospect, he was saying he didn’t let you know the next time I go some- they’re out of town. There are only thing: “I don’t want to go; everyone’s get everything I said, but I thought he where. But don’t count on it. As some- about 200 frum families living there. gonna be there.” For example, if you was just telling me to say, “Please.” Like one who lives in town, I hate getting Yes, there are 200 families in Cincin- see another frum person in Shoprite, he’s my mother. I was pretty sure I’d out of the house. nati. There are over 80 in my shul in your fi rst thought is, “I bet he’s going to Passaic, and it’s one of the smaller shuls get the last two grape juices.” Mordechai Schmutter is a weekly humor columnist for Hamodia, a monthly humor in town. And they all know each oth- We want to live where everyone else columnist for The Jewish Press, and has written three books, all published by Israel er’s names in Cincinnati. I don’t even is, but we don’t want to see them. Book Shop. He also does freelance writing for hire. You can send any questions, com- know the names of everyone in my Another thing that my contact told ments, or ideas to [email protected]

48 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 For What It’s Worth Warren S. Hecht Ride, Captain, Ride

not look at very closely. phenomenon. Like anything else, many other choices of things to do, What is noticeably absent from the crucial period is when people are such as going on the computer/Inter- these events or on the bike paths are young. If they ride when they are chil- net, which we did not have. On the young riders. For example, most of dren, then it is more likely that they other hand, we had television, and the riders today were in my age group. will ride as adults. Out of three hundred fi fty riders, may- One excuse given is that there are CONTINUED ON P. 60 be half a dozen were twenty-fi ve or younger. Warren S. Hecht is President of the Queens Jewish Community Council and a local There are several reasons for this attorney. He can be reached at [email protected].

he fi rst reaction that a per- son may have in reading my Tarticle about bicycle riding is: How can I write on such a trivial topic when three yeshivah boys are missing? I have three answers. As a columnist, I try to anticipate what the other columnists will be writing about. I expect that the situation in- volving the three yeshivah boys will be addressed in detail. The readers do not need to read another column- ist talking about it. Secondly, as will be explained in the column, the issue of bicycle riding warrants discussion. Furthermore, although our hearts and minds are thinking about the missing boys, it is important that we do not

Warren S. Hecht is President of the Queens Jewish Community Council and a local attorney. He can be reached at [email protected]. What is noticeably absent from these events or on the bike paths are young riders

neglect our own basic needs. One of our basic needs is be- ing healthy, which includes getting enough exercise. My favorite form of exercising is bicycle riding. It is so much easier to bike-ride today than when I was growing up. Years ago there was no such thing as a bike lane. There were very few bike paths. There are bike lanes and paths all over New York City. Manhattan, which you would think would be the last place to have bike lanes or paths, has bike paths on both the west and east sides. You can go from Battery Park to Wash- ington Heights on a bike path. There are also various bike tours in the fi ve boroughs and in Nassau and Suffolk counties and other surround- ing areas. Although the tours allow one to ride at his own pace, there are also various distances that one can choose. The routes are clearly marked and there are rest areas where they provide water or Gatorade or fruit. On Sunday, I went to the Nassau-to-Suf- folk Bicycle Challenge. Not only was it good exercise, but I went through several well-to-do and picturesque neighborhoods that I normally would not see or, if I did drive through, would

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 49 House & Home Rabbi Gedaliah and Sarah Newcomb Choosing Wisely: When Sellers Receive Multiple Offers On The Same Property

here is no steadfast rule about his reliability and integrity. The same B and second scenario above: Buyer 3 much confusion and the downfall of making a decision between mul- holds true for the attorneys involved. should have adjusted his offer immedi- the transaction. There are good reasons Ttiple offers. Tradition has it that The same holds true for the mortgage ately, as he was advised by the seller’s why LIBOR and MLS have structured the “highest price rules.” That is simply brokers – and sometimes buyer’s rel- realtor, but simply did not believe it. He transactions in such a way where the no longer the case. Because I have had atives and anybody else intimately in- instead slowly inched up in negotiation listing broker manages the details and personal experience with this recently, volved. and maxed out of time. Seller B had a why this approach is most successful. and in the past few weeks in particular, Two recent scenarios: Seller A had lot of stress from the original change Buyer 1’s broker is what I refer to as a let’s think out loud about how sellers and multiple offers. He chose one that was from Buyer 1 and Buyer 2, and perhaps “Legend”: a respectable fellow from out their representative licensed profession- not the highest because the buyer was in a future situation may choose to stay of our area who has enjoyed a solid rep- al realtors can come to the best decision a friend and also because of personal on course with an originally accepted utation for decades, and I was honored possible. circumstances that led the sellers to be- and reliable deal. There is something to work with him. He is not only a rule Sellers may compare the price being lieve the transaction would be quicker to be said for a “gentleman’s agreement” follower (anybody who can endure a offered. Along with that, it is important and simpler. I agreed and encouraged and for those who value that. (Another sterling reputation for decades is doing that sellers understand the mortgage this because I felt it was best for the seller of mine told me about a situation something right), but full of integrity. process for those buyers requiring fi - seller. As bumps came up, I was able to where she was outbid after she had an All parties need to acknowledge the nancing. Sellers should not leave it to smooth them along and keep everybody accepted offer in another neighbor- importance of having reputable profes- the realtors entirely as far as that goes. on the same team. One of my goals is al- hood. The seller of the house she was sional realtors on board, and I person- Good realtors will educate their sell- ways to make every party feel validated planning to purchase decided to refund ally am full of gratitude for the chance ers in the mortgage process and what and fi nd the middle ground that works. her the money she spent on the home to complete a deal with such a person, it means nowadays for the seller to Next scenario: Seller B had two of- inspector which was a mentchlich thing b’ezras Hashem. choose a buyer requiring fi nancing, as fers and then a third. He chose one that to do in my humble opinion.) Buyer 2 Having said all of the above, the bot- opposed to a buyer who already has all seemed reliable and the people were could have had careful discussion with tom line as always is that Hashem is the of the cash on hand. A seller and his pleasant and sincere. Another one of the agent who brought him and his at- boss. I see it every day. We think we are realtor team should also consider the the offerers then decided to raise his torney about the specifi c terms before pulling strings and, lo and behold, we people and think carefully about who offer signifi cantly above the others. he actually spent money on lawyers are not. Hashem decides every piece will be pleasant and easy to deal with That caused the seller to reconsider his and home inspectors, which frustrated of everything that occurs. Our best bet, throughout an entire transaction, as choice and go with the higher offerer. him. The agent who brought the buy- above all, is to pray that Hashem guides sometimes bumps may come up along The fi rst offerer was disappointed but er in this case absolutely should have us to see what are wise choices, what the road and somebody who is diffi cult waited patiently to see what would limited her interactions to the listing good decisions should be, and then the to deal with will only be that much transpire. The second, higher offerer realtor, as required by the Multiple List- courage to act on them. As I write this more stressful to work with should backed out of the purchase due to con- ing Service of Queens and Long Island. from the peaceful Pocono Mountains, problems arise. A seller and his realtor fusion regarding the terms of the con- Constantly trying to communicate with we wish everyone a beautiful and rest- should give the same consideration to tract, although his agent assured the the seller directly is not only improper ful summer z’man of growth and enjoy- the agent who has brought the buyer, seller that the terms were acceptable. but in this case seems to have caused ing precious family time together. if there is one, and the property has The fi rst buyers were happy to resume been on the Multiple Listing Service of the transaction at their original terms Rabbi Gedaliah and Sarah Newcomb are NY State Licensed Realtors for over 13 Queens and Long Island. Like anybody and it seemed that it was the path years. While specializing in Kew Gardens Hills where they are long-time community else, there are realtors who are easier meant to take all along anyhow. The members, they serve all areas in the Five Boros and Long Island. They hold several and more reliable to work with than third buyer who joined the party a lit- specialty certifi cations and are members of the Long Island Board of Realtors and others. Since that person may be more tle too late continued to raise his offers, the Multiple Listing Service of Queens and Long Island. Rabbi Newcomb is a beloved of the point of contact than the actual but not in a timely enough fashion for Rebbe at Yeshiva Tiferes Moshe. Sarah Newcomb has won multiple awards from RE/ buyer, it is quite important to consider any meaningful consideration to take MAX NY and RE/MAX International. They, along with their family, make their home the ease of working with that person place. in and are proud members of the Kew Gardens Hills community. You may contact throughout an entire transaction and Lessons to be learned from Seller them at [email protected], Queensrealtorteam.com or at 9174597549.

50 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Classifieds

EMPLOYMENT 4th grade P.M. general studies, 2) Monday, June 23, 7-9:15 pm @ Carlos all girls Queens school, SINGLES/EVENTS and Gabby’s, 1376 Coney Island Ave. UP- Local Headstart program licensed and experienced only Kosher Chef ProducƟ ons STAIRS, Flatbush. Buff et included. seeking Fax resume to 718 847 2912. Shidduch & Shadchan Events 3) Wed., June 25, 7-9:15PM @ Eden Wok, for all 43 East 34th St, NYC 10016 American-Style Preschool Local Headstart program seeing Chassidish, Yeshivish & Modern singles, Oriental meal included. Preschool Teachers and ages 20-120 $25 early online, $36 full event price. 1) Sunday, June 22, 5:15-8:30 pm @ The Register on www.EventBrite.com Assistant Teachers for coming year. Teachers Beyman home (backyard) 1 Ranger Road, KosherChefProducƟ [email protected] Summer posi ons available. Compe ve and Monsey, NY 10952. Kosher Chef Produc- Chef Moshe 845.397.7271 salary. Benefi ts available. Email resume to ons BBQ Buff et included. Assistant [email protected]. Assistant PosiƟ on in KGH IMPORTANT NUMBERS Teachers Dynamic program for one and two-year for coming year. olds is seeking assistants for the upcoming Chaveirim — providing Mikvah Israel/ KGH Mikvah, Flushing Summer posi ons available. school year. For more informa on please roadside assistance 718-268-6500 call 347-829-0943 Compe ve salary. 718-441-0505 Toby Pelman Mikvah/JCC of Hillcrest Benefi ts available. SERVICES Hatzolah 718-969-4937 Email resume to Young man with car available for courier Mikvah of Beth Israel of work and light deliveries. Contact Ellio at 718-387-1750 Spinka, Rego Park [email protected]. 718-427-0180. Chevra Kaddisha 718-592-9786 REAL ESTATE 718-849-9700 EMPLOYMENT Erna Lindenfeld Hachnossas House for Sale Kew Gardens Hills. 144-20 Eruv Hotline (Forest Hills) Bnos Malka Academy seeks kodesh & ELA/ 72nd Drive. 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Kallah Fund Finished Basement. Call 347-386-5664. 718-544-6898 SS teachers. Warm and posi ve candidate 718-591-9599 must possess Masters Degree in educa- Lovely Jerusalem Apt for Rent by Owners. Eruv Hotline (Kew Gardens Hills) Baby Equipment Gemach: on/special educa on, NYS license pre- Two Bedroom Two Bathroom Strictly Kosher 718-263-3921 Tzivia Dietch ferred and passionately believe that every Kitchen. Short walk to Kotel and Emek Bikur Cholim of Queens: 718-275-5287 child can succeed. Please send resumes to Rafaim and Great Synagogue etc. Located in Pinsker building in Talbiah, near to Inbal ffi 718-380-7433 Shaindel Ruchel Baby Food Gemach o [email protected] Hotel. Air condi oned, wireless internet, cable television, Washer Dryer, Parking, Easy Kol Halashon 347-416-3672 EMPLOYMENT Access, Two Shabbat elevators on 12th fl oor. 718-395-2440 Table & Chair Gemach KGH Shul in building. Fantas c views – 2 Porch- Looking for a fun and exciƟ ng way to end es.$900 per week plus electric and cleaning 917-882-1414 your summer? Vaad HaRabonim of Queens depending on me frame and # of people. Modest Hospital Gown Join Ohel Bais Ezra’s end of summer sleep- Call Owners 917-519-6185. 718-520-9060 a-way camp programs! Gemach of Queens Tomchei Shabbos Enjoy ac vi es, gorgeous outdoor camp- West Hempstead 917-859-8177 grounds, and much more, all while making Charming Colonial On Desirable Street 718-850-8070 a diff erence in the life of a child or teen Four Bedrooms, Two Baths, Den, Queens Jewish Community Council with a developmental disability. Posi ons Finished Basement, Near Shuls, LIRR Cong. Mikvah Israel of Forest Hills 718-544-9033 available include: Group Leaders, Counsel- By Owner. 516-483-1464 718-897-9370 ors, Lifeguards, Dining Room Staff , Nurse Avigdor’s Helping Hand and Specialty Staff (music, art, sensory MERCHANDISE Mikvah of Queens/ 718-568-9720 integra on, dance, zumba, karate, sports, BEDROOM SET. $3,500. Upgrade your Forest Hills Mikvah Chickens for Shabbos and more). master bedroom w/beau ful cherry-fi nished Boys Sleep Away Camp at Camp Kaylie: Stanley furniture. 10-drawer DRESSER, MIR- 718-261-6380 718-261-9723 8/20/14-8/28/14 Girls Sleep Away Camp at ROR, ARMOIRE, 2 NIGHT STANDS, Custom Kew Gardens Mikvah, Richmond Hill Queens Kallah Gown Gemach Camp Nageela: 8/20/14-8/28/14 GLASS TOPS. Contact: 718-404-8914 or 347- For more informa on davidƞ [email protected]. Pics available. 718-849-0065 495-1011 please contact Isabel: (718) 686-3475 or [email protected] MERCHANDISE/ TAG SALE To add to this list, please email your important Kew Gardens HIlls - Tag/Garage Sale numbers to [email protected] Queens boys yeshiva is looking for a Sunday 6/22/14...6809 Main St., 9-5. 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28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 51 Community Corner • Recent Happenings Queens Community Unites For Prayer Gathering For Kidnapped Boys In Israel By Jennifer Jaffe bos, hundreds gathered in our own bachurim. His voice trembling, Rabbi recited, led by R’ Doniel Steinberg and community at Yeshivas Ohr HaChaim Lander stated that this is a time of suf- by Rabbi Peretz Steinberg, Rav of the n the night of Thursday, June 12, in Kew Gardens Hills to say t’hilim on fering not only for the boys’ families, Young Israel of Queens Valley, the at- the worst nightmare for any par- behalf of the young boys ripped away but for the entire Jewish nation as mosphere in the yeshivah was fi lled Oent came true, when terrorists from their families in a despicable act well: “We stand with them, we share with strength, unity, and compassion kidnapped three teenage boys on their of cowardice. The gathering was or- their profound piercing pain, and we for the immeasurable suffering of the way home for Shabbos from Yeshiva Me- ganized by local organizations Chazaq recognize together that it is an eis young boys, their families, and our en- kor Chaim in Gush Etzion, Israel. The and Chickens for Shabbos. tzarah, a time of tragedy.” tire nation. unbearable agony the families of Naftali As each of the heartfelt words in Rabbi Lander continued by point- One attendee of note was Congress- Fraenkel, Eyal Yifrach, and Gilad Shaar t’hilim, written by David HaMelech, ing out that a dark cloud now hovers woman Grace Meng, who was present are going through while they await the were uttered in unison, a connection over all of klal Yisrael. In response to to offer her support and prayers. (See safe return of their children cannot be was formed that strengthened our this tragedy, Jewish women were en- photo on page 55.) measured in words. As a community, prayers for the safe return of these couraged to light two extra Shabbos We must all have in mind and re- we must do something, and our strong- young boys. Rabbi Doniel Land- candles and take in Shabbos early in member, as Rabbi Lander asserted: est defense outside of Israel against the er, Rosh HaYeshiva of Yeshivas Ohr order to devote that extra time say- “When klal Yisrael once again arises monsters who did this is prayer. HaChaim, gave powerful opening re- ing t’hilim, while men were asked to as am echad, we will bring g’ulah.” Around the world, vigils are taking marks to the hundreds of men and spend that time in t’fi lah, learning for As a nation, we must stand together place for Naftali, Eyal, and Gilad to women who gathered in unity. His the z’chus of the three bachurim. He against terrorism, in support of our show support to their families and to poignant words spoke of the agony reminded us of the koach of T’hilim nation and for the quick and safe re- show the world that terrorism is un- the families and our entire nation are and the koach of T’fi lah. turn of Naftali, Eyal, and Gilad. acceptable. This past Motza’ei Shab- feeling for the suffering of the three As the 16 chapters of T’hilim were (See photos on page 55) Impactful Introduction Elicits Unexpected Speech From HaRav Dovid Schustal By Susie Garber HaChaim, which was preceded by an himself; he saw the destruction in Eu- Rav Kotler was. He was a person who introduction by HaRav Doniel Lander, rope and he felt the future of Torah was never hurt anyone, and that was how he n Shabbos, June 13, Parshas Rav Schustal headed to Ohel Yitzchak in America. Seventy years ago, America built his yeshivah. His emphasis on re- Sh’lach, the Queens community to speak. The heartfelt introduction he was a desert in terms of Torah. Rav Kot- specting his fellow man was legendary. Owas graced with the presence of received from Rabbi Shaul Arieli, Rav of ler got Kalev’s message when he said, “We Next, Rav Schustel spoke. He an- HaGaon HaRav Dovid Schustal shlita, one Ohel Yitzchak, caused Rabbi Schustal to will fi ght. We will win.” Now today we nounced that Rabbi Arieli’s introduction of the Roshei HaYeshiva of Beth Medrash alter his prepared speech in response to have the Beth Medrash Govoha in Lake- so moved him that he was now going to Govoha. The Rav visited a number of Rabbi Arieli’s words. wood and a makom Torah in every town deliver a totally different speech from shuls, batei midrash, and homes in Kew Rabbi Arieli began with a d’var To- because of the Lakewood yeshivah. the one he had originally planned. Rav Gardens Hills, which added to the achdus rah about Kalev, who did not hesitate Rabbi Arieli shared that he came to Schustel noted that every Yom Kippur and holiness spread in our community. when he heard the report of ten of the America alone in 1968 and went to the before Kol Nidrei, his father-in-law, Rav He began by attending the plag minyan of other M’raglim. Rather, he stated, “We study of Rav Shneur Kotler, who told Shneur Kotler, would always share the Congregation Ahavas Yisroel, where the will fi ght and we will win.” Rabbi Arieli Rabbi Arieli, that his grandfather, Rav Iss- same Chazal from the Talmud Yerushal- Rav, Rabbi Herschel Welcher, welcomed pointed out that this is a message to us er Zalman Meltzer, davened in the same mi that Rabbi Arieli had mentioned. He Rav Schustal to the community and to and that it was also the message of a lone shul in Yerushalayim. Rav Shneur Kot- also spoke about the three pillars of the the shul. Rav Schustal shared with the tzi- individual who left Europe in 1941 to trav- ler gave this young boy who was alone yeshivah: Torah, Avodah, and G’milus Cha- bur the vision and the successes of Beth el to San Francisco. From there this lone in America, tremendous chizuk. Rabbi sadim, and how these are the pillars of Medrash Govoha. Mr. Bernie Shafran individual travelled to New York where Arieli recalled a Chazal that Rav Isser Zal- every individual. He complimented the headed the campaign committee. he was greeted by an Agudah delegation. man shared from Talmud Yerushalmi that Queens community on his fi rst visit for On Shabbos morning, after deliver- This individual was HaRav Aharon Kotler taught the importance of not hurting Shabbos, as he was impressed with the ing a beautiful shiur at Yeshivas Ohr zt”l, who stated that he did not come for anyone. Rabbi Arieli said this was who holiness and achdus of our community. Meng Issues Statement On The Abduction Of Three Israeli Teenagers S Rep. Grace Meng (D-NY), a raeli teenagers: petrators of this despicable crime re- return. The United States stands with member of the House Foreign “The kidnapping of three Israeli lease these innocent teens at once. My our ally Israel and the teens’ loved ones UAffairs Subcommittee on the teenagers is outrageous and unaccept- heart aches for the three young men during this diffi cult time, and I urge US Middle East, issued the following state- able, and I condemn it in the strongest and their families, and I ask all Amer- offi cials to assist them by providing ment on the abduction of the three Is- possible terms. I demand that the per- icans to pray for their safe and speedy whatever resources they require.”

52 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 TO ADD YOUR EVENT TO OUR COMMUNITY CALENDAR, PLEASE EMAIL THE EVENT, DATE/TIME, PLACE, AND A BRIEF DESCRIPTION TO: [email protected]

and the Israel Center of Conserva- At 8:30 p.m., The host a community-wide shiur for JUNE tive Judaism will hold a free concert Chazaq Women’s women given by Rebbetzin Ne- featuring A Shur Thing. At the Israel Division and chama Karlinsky from Eyaht-Aish At 7:30 p.m., the Center for Conservative Judaism, 167- Emet, in conjunc- Hatorah Women’s College in Jerusa-

Queens Chapter rd Monday 30 11 73 Ave., Hillcrest. For more infor- tion with Beit lem on the topic of “Facing Adversi- of the Chaverim mation, please call the QJCC at 718- Gavriel, will pres- ty with Emunah.” 25 of the Lone Sol- 544-9033. ent a lecture for women by Reb- dier Center will

Wednesday Wednesday betzin Devorah Kigel. At Beit Gavriel Friday-Sunday hold a meeting At 6:15 p.m., the Center, 66-35 108th Street, Forest Hills. 11-14 in the Library of the Young Israel of Young Israel of For more information, please call The Orthodox th Kew Gardens Hills (150-05 70 Road, Kew Gardens Hills 646-541-6833 or contact info@chazaq. The Orthodox Kew Gardens Hills). All relatives of Friday 11 will hold a lecture org. Union will hold

Lone Soldiers in the Israel Defense Shabbos 28 for men and a Marriage En- Forces and all supporters are most women by Hershy richment Retreat at the Woodcliff welcome. and Linda Friedman on the topic, JULY Lake Hilton in New Jersey. $750 “Are Jews Funny? Humor in the Tan- per couple (includes room, meals, At 7:00 p.m., the ach and the Talmud.” This talk is part At 8:00 p.m., Con- workshops, and tips for wait staff). Queens Jewish of the Summer Shabbos Afternoon gregation Ahavas To reserve, call 212.613.8300. For Community Lecture Series organized by the YIKGH Yisroel (73rd Ave- more information, please call Han- Council, NY City Women’s League and Education Com- nue and 147th nah Farkas, Program Manager, at Tuesday Tuesday

Thursday Thursday 26 8 Council Member mittee. In the Beis Medrash, 150-05 Street, Kew Gar- 212-613-8351, or contact her at han- Rory Lancman, 70th Road, Kew Gardens Hills. dens Hills) will [email protected]. “Bring Back Our Boys”: New York City Offi cials Stand In Solidarity With Israel After The Kidnapping Of Three Jewish Teenagers In Israel CONTINUED FROM P. 39 international community together, kidnapped, and used for political gain, derscored Comptroller Stringer. “We’re and to put pressure on the Palestinian or for terrorism,” Kaplan said. united with Israel. We demand that prayers are with the families of those government. It’s an international cam- How are you using social media to pro- these boys be returned home safely and teenagers. The young men must be re- paign; it’s a social media campaign,” Ka- mote outreach for the campaign? swiftly. Today, as Americans, as New leased immediately so they can return to plan explained. “The big thing on social media is the Yorkers, we all pray for their safe return.” their loved ones. Let us hope and pray “When the terrorists kidnapped hashtag #bringbackourboys, which we US Secretary of State John Kerry con- that they get home safely, and quickly. these kids, these three Jewish boys, have trending on Facebook, on Twitter, demned the kidnapping from the out- Each day they spend in captivity is one that’s part of our family. It’s not just and Instagram. Through this hashtag, set, and in cooperation with Israel, the day too many.” three kids in some foreign country, it’s we’re hoping to spread it throughout the US government has continued to gather Yoni Kaplan, the 23-year-old tri-state not just three kids in Israel, that we world, and not just in the [US]. We’re try- details about the abduction in the hope area campus coordinator with Stand- have a connection to; this is literally ing to send out the message #bringback- that the three Jewish teenagers will soon WithUs, a pro-Israel education and our family… We want to make sure that ourboys, so that maybe someone, some- be freed. advocacy organization with branch- everyone around the world is affected where, will know something, and to give “Israel will act against the kidnappers, es throughout the world, told Queens by it, because these kids don’t deserve us some information so that we can re- and their terrorist sponsors. We will do Jewish Link that the non-profi t organi- to be drawn into the confl ict. When lay it to their families,” said Kaplan. whatever needs to be done to protect zation’s efforts are “to raise awareness you’re going back home from school, “Let’s be clear: ‘Bring back our boys’ our people,” emphasized Prime Minister and let people know to try to get the you shouldn’t expect to be lifted and is not a slogan; it’s a call to action,” un- Netanyahu.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 53 Community Corner • Recent Happenings After Kidnapping Of Israeli Teens, Young Israel Calls On Congress To Halt Funding To The Palestinian Authority he National Council of of the so-called unity government, “In part, United States foreign aid that provides a safe haven for terror- Young Israel calls on Con- and PA President Mahmoud Abbas should be used as leverage to rid the ists who murder and kidnap Israelis “Tgress to terminate foreign himself, to seek a peaceful solution culture of hate that permeates Pales- and then celebrates their heinous aid to the Palestinian Authority until in the Middle East. The area under tinian textbooks and television pro- crimes. Abbas’ practice of embracing it dissociates from Hamas and demon- the administrative control of the grams and bred a generation of terror- and glorifying terrorist murderers as strates an unequivocal commitment to Palestinian Authority has served as ists. This indoctrination is evidenced heroes, naming squares after them, remove terrorists from areas under its a sanctuary for terrorists who mur- by the Anti-Defamation League, which and calling for their release from pris- administrative control. der and kidnap Israelis, and the area recently reported that 93 percent of on must end now. “The recent Hamas abduction of under Hamas control serves as the the adult population in the West Bank “We pray for the safe return of Gilad, three Israeli teenagers, one of whom launching-pad for missiles that target and Gaza harbor anti-Semitic views. In Naftali, and Eyal. May they be found is a United States citizen, calls into civilians and as a staging-ground for addition, United States funds should and returned healthy to their families question the ability and commitment terrorist activities. not be used to support a government immediately and unconditionally.” Touro College Division Of Graduate Studies Celebrates Commencement ouro College’s Division of tion of vice president. speaker, Dr. Jeffrey Gardere, assistant lya Honig (Psychology); Julie Jimenez Graduate Studies held com- “Dr. Polemeni was an outstanding professor and course director at the (Social Work); and Loucas Karipis Tmencement ceremonies for educator, leader, colleague, and a Touro College of Osteopathic Medi- (Technology). 2,264 candidates for master’s degrees friend. He nurtured and led his Tou- cine in Harlem, then provided a moti- Lorinda Moore, from the Gradu- or advanced certifi cates from six ro family, and his absence is felt by vational speech, reminding the grad- ate School of Business, brought the graduate schools at Lincoln Center’s each and every one of his colleagues. uates of numerous problems facing house to its feet with her rousing Avery Fisher Hall on June 12. Since he took leave of us we have America and the world – from global remarks. Moore earned a bachelor’s The audience of approximately asked ourselves, ‘How does one re- warming to hate crimes to poor treat- degree from Touro in 2010. She talk- 2,700 included the degree candidates place the irreplaceable?’” ment of military veterans. ed about how she used her strength from the graduate schools of business, Rabbi Krupka said that Dr. Graff “All is not lost because we have a and determination to get her through education, Jewish studies, psycholo- has served in the interim with “grace, not-so-secret but powerful weapon – three major health crises and other gy, social work, and technology, along professionalism, creativity, and vi- we have you,” he told the graduates. challenges to earn her master’s in with parents, well-wishers, and Touro sion” and noted she has been with “Your education has prepared you human resource management at the administrators, faculty, and staff. Touro since 1980, when she began as for this. Whether you are aware of business school. Ms. Moore, who The program began with an invo- an academic coordinator in the Phy- it or not, Touro’s principles are at the writes poetry and performs on ra- cation by Rabbi Moshe D. Krupka, sician Assistant program. foundation of your education. Tou- dio programs, plans to use her new executive vice president of the Touro Dr. Graff then took to the podium ro is unique. The Touro education degree to help people in her neigh- College and University System, who to welcome the Class of 2014 and in- is about service. We expect you to borhood start businesses and help spoke solemnly of the passing in May troduce the deans of the six graduate utilize your excellent education and homeless people get out of shelters. of Dr. Anthony J. Polemeni, former schools: Sabra Brock, PhD (Business); keen intellect to continue in the Tou- “You cannot let obstacles stop you. vice president of the Graduate Divi- LaMar Miller, PhD (Education); Mi- ro tradition.” I made it to Touro and I was grateful. sion. He then announced on behalf chael Shmidman, PhD (Jewish Stud- Each dean then introduced a stu- The people here are so important – of President and CEO Dr. Alan Kadish ies); Richard Waxman, PhD (Psychol- dent speaker who addressed the as- Touro became part of my family,” she the appointment of Dr. Nadja Graff, ogy); Steven Huberman, PhD (Social sembly on behalf of his or her peers. said. “Do what you love to do. You who has been serving as interim vice Work); and Issac Herskowitz, PhD The speakers were: Lorinda Moore are supposed to make a difference. president since Dr. Polemeni stepped (Technology). (Business); Cheryl Lee (Education); You’ve heard of the US Air Force? You down nearly a year ago, to the posi- The afternoon’s commencement Moishy Gerstel (Jewish Studies); Ta- are the Touro Armed Forces.” Lifetime Achievement Award Presented To David Mandel avid Mandel (right), CEO of OHEL and Founding Chairman of the Touro College Graduate School of DSocial Work, was honored by the school with its Lifetime of Community Service Award, presented by Dean Steven Huberman (left) and Touro College Chancellor Don- iel Lander (center) during the Touro College Graduate School of Social Work Award Recognition Program on June 10, 2014.

54 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Community Corner • Recent Happenings Lakewood Rabbanim Visit Queens On Behalf Of Beth Medrash Govoha

Rabbi Friedman (R) greets Rav Malkiel Kotler Bernie Shafran is presented with an award for his work Partial view of the overflowing audience on behalf of BMG By Sergey Kadinsky roel, and concluded on the evening of Schonfeld. “I didn’t quite fi t into the at the invitation of Eli Ribiat, whose June 17 at the Shafran residence, where puzzle.” Despite having a different wife Adina was my wife’s classmate at ith nearly seven thousand stu- Rabbi Yoel Schonfeld spoke of his own education than most of his Lakewood the Bais Yaakov in Montreal. Although dents toiling daily over centu- experiences at Lakewood as he intro- classmates, he was quickly welcomed the day of a BMG talmid is long, the Wries of Talmudic commentary, duced the Rosh HaYeshiva, Rav Malkiel into the seminary and a lifelong appre- home is small, and the budget is tight, the legendary Beth Medrash Govoha Kotler shlita. Between the shuls, promi- ciation for Beth Medrash Govoha devel- the Ribiats are confi dent that living and seminary in Lakewood, NJ, has earned nent local supporters Mordechai Weiss, oped. On his recent visit to Jerusalem, learning in Lakewood is the beginning its reputation as the country’s leading Ya’acov Granek, Rabbi Menashe Tzadka, Rabbi Schonfeld visited Har Hamenu- of a lifelong dedication to accurate- school for Torah scholars. As its student and Reuven Yusupov hosted presenta- chot, where his Rosh HaYeshiva is bur- ly analyzing Talmudic commentary, body grows, so is the need for the school tions for Lakewood in their homes. ied. “I cried like a baby over his kever; I building the foundation of a solid Jew- to seek the support of Jewish communi- The concluding event of the Lake- feel a tremendous hakaras ha’tov to the ish family, and inspiring Jewish com- ties worldwide in sustaining the enter- wood visit to Queens was perhaps the yeshivah.” munities far beyond the yeshivah. Eli prise. one with the most local resonance, as Since the p’tirah of Rav Shneur Kot- reminds me that while the initial years For the past 25 years, Kew Gardens Rabbi Yoel Schonfeld, in the presence ler in 1982, the responsibility of leading are spartan, with time the alumni will Hills resident Bernie Shafran has orga- of his father Rabbi Fabian Schonfeld Beth Medrash Govoha has been dele- become lawyers, business profession- nized the Queens fundraising effort on – and Rav Kotler – spoke to a packed gated to his son Rav Malkiel, along with als, and entrepreneurs, taking the les- behalf of the yeshivah. As Lakewood’s house about his unique education. his son-in-law Rav Dovid Schustal, Rav sons of Lakewood as their guide in all reputation continues to rise, the num- “Last night, I was at an evening for Ye- Yerucham Olshin, and Rav Yisroel Neu- aspects of their lives. ber of individuals and shuls eager to shiva Kerem B’Yavneh, one of the fi rst man. Closer to home, Rabbi Schonfeld ex- lend their support has also multiplied. in Israel to have the hesder program,” “The warm reception was a tremen- emplifi es the uncompromising Lake- “This was our fi rst ever Queens Shab- said Rabbi Schonfeld. “Tonight I am dous chizuk,” said Rav Kotler. In his wood approach towards learning, per- bos,” said Rabbi Shmuel Gilbert, a fund- speaking for Lakewood.” Son of a Ye- keynote speech, he spoke about the sonal observance standards, and social raising director for the yeshivah. “Every shiva University musmach, the younger order of the korbanos for the N’siim issues in the midst of a diverse Jewish place we went, it was packed out the Rabbi Schonfeld attended MTA, the uni- (the leaders of the tribes) as being the community. The audience recognized door.” versity’s high school for boys, followed same for receiving klal Yisrael. “Chanu- the source of Rabbi Schonfeld’s approach In contrast to previous years, the by Kerem B’Yavneh. Upon his return to kas HaBayis and Chanukas Beis Yisrael, and gave generously. In recognition to week of Parshas Sh’lach brought Lake- America, his uncle invited him to visit these are korbanos N’siim. Klal Yisrael is the quarter-century-long bond that Mr. wood rabbanim to Congregation Aha- Lakewood. an am s’gulah.” Shafran fostered between Queens and vas Yisroel, Yeshivas Ohr HaChaim, Bais “I was just a boy out of high school, Having read so much about the 71- Lakewood, the yeshivah presented him Medrash Ohel Yitzchak, Yeshiva Ohel interested in sports, and here I was year old yeshivah, I only had the fi rst an award and is looking forward to re- Simcha, and Congregation Degel Yis- sitting with Rav Shneur,” said Rabbi experience of visiting it last September, ceiving more chizuk next year. Yeshivas HaMasmidim Celebrates End-Of-Year Mesibah By Susie Garber ning was meant to be a celebration, he explained that it was appropriate t’s good to learn extra. I have a to recite t’hilim on behalf of the three good rebbe.” These words stat- captured boys. He exhorted them to “Ied by one young participant say it with kavanah. Next, each stu- refl ected the feelings and excitement of dent received a sefer of his choice. the boys in grades three through seven, The boys’ enthusiasm on receiving the who participated in the weekly Yeshivas s’farim and the general leibedik atmo- HaMasmidim. This mishmar for younger sphere of the s’udah refl ected the joy boys was started 33 years ago by Rabbi Rabbi Shedrowitzky shlita of learning Torah. Eliezer Shedrowitzky shlita, Rav of the Mr. Nachum Shmuel Hartman, Pres- Agudah of Kew Gardens Hills, in memory Moshe, Yeshiva Ketana Zichron Chaim bi Shedrowitzky addressed them. He ident of Agudah, praised the program. of his father. U’Binah, Yeshiva of Central Queens, and said, “Remember wherever you are, The boys learn once a week and they The Yeshivas HaMasmidim meets others. you’re a masmid. Be proud of it.” He receive prizes. The Chanukah party in- once a week in the Agudah shul located The end-of-the-year party took place spoke to them briefl y about the kid- cluded a raffl e for a Shas. in the Yeshiva of Central Queens. The on Monday evening, June 16. Rabbi napping in Eretz Yisrael of three yeshi- Our community is fortunate to es- boys learn Gemara, Mishnayos, and/or Chaim Wahrman, Director, welcomed vah students, and he imparted that the pouse wonderful programs such as this Chumash. They come from local com- the students. The boys enjoyed a de- Gemara states that being captured is that promote and celebrate Torah learn- munity yeshivos such as Yeshiva Tiferes licious pizza dinner. Afterwards, Rab- the worst thing. So although this eve- ing for our children.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 55 Community Corner • Recent Happenings First Ever Queens Jewish Women’s Writers’ Conference Attracts Large Crowd By Susie Garber

n Sunday morning, June 15, a large group of women from all Ofi ve boroughs, Monsey, New Jersey, and even Oak Park, Michigan, congregated for the fi rst Jewish Writers Conference at Yeshiva Ohel Simcha, the perfectly named place for this joyous event. This writer welcomed everyone and expressed the fact that Jewish women writers have the calling and respon- sibility to articulate both the beauty of being a Jewish woman and Torah ideas, and share them with the world. The fi rst speaker, Mrs. Etka Git- Rabbi Paysach Krohn speaking at the Queens Jewish Women’s Writers meeting the publishers at the Jewish Women’s Writers’ Confer- tel Schwartz, well-known author of Writers’ Conference ence historical fi ction in Binah Magazine, shared valuable writing tips and ad- gested reading your work out loud to theme. That is the soul of the story. off the page. That’s the beauty of writ- vice. We write as a dreamer seeing a see where to put commas. You have to Don’t tell your readers your theme or ing.” He stated that the fi rst sentence scene. We have to smell, taste, and vary the rhythm of the sentences. She message. Let them discover it and you is so important. The author must hear what we are writing. We have noted that all writing is poetry. Plot- should know your ending before you think about his audience. Who am I to see our writing with all fi ve senses. ting a story is like dominos. You need start to write. You should foreshadow writing for? She explained that stories are always to plan scenes and see where a dom- that ending in the beginning. Rabbi Krohn then shared his own about human feelings. Writing is 75% ino is missing. Plotting is the bones, This speech was followed by a writing journey and the indescribable thinking and 25% writing. She sug- but the heart of the story is your choice of workshops. Mrs. Chaviva moment when Rabbi Nosson Scher- Pfeiffer, author of the Maggid series man of ArtScroll entered Rabbi Kro- for Children and other books, led a hn’s name and number into a note- workshop on nonfi ction. At the same book, placed it in his pocket near his time, this author led a fi ction work- heart and said, “Now you’re one of us.” shop. Rabbi Krohn went on to share the Next, the audience was treated to a story of how he began writing the unique speech by Rabbi Paysach Kro- Maggid series. He explained how he hn, well-known mohel, author, and collects stories with universal appeal speaker. Rabbi Krohn noted that this that would inspire anyone. He end- was a special opportunity to speak to ed with a blessing to all the partici- a roomful of writers about his writing pants that “Hashem should help each process. He shared the history of how of you to continue writing and be he began writing his fi rst book. He inspired and to inspire others in klal began with the story of his fi rst sixth- Yisrael.” grade essay, which became a bonding During the lunch break, the partici- experience for him with his mother pants had the opportunity to network a”h, who was also an author. He traced with various publishers and editors the beginnings of ArtScroll Publishing including The Jewish Press, Mishpacha and how he decided to write a book Magazine, Binah Magazine, Judaica about Bris Milah that he still gives out Press, and Feldheim Publishers. to parents before performing a bris for After lunch, Mrs. Ellen Bari shared their baby. He expressed that there is her experience writing her picture nothing quite like getting your name books. One of her books is on display in print. You’re validated, he stated. in the Holocaust Museum in Washing- He shared how he asked his rebbe if ton, DC. he should continue to write, as the The last workshop, on memoir writ- time required meant he could not ing and polishing your work, was giv- have as many sedarim. His rebbe said en by this writer. The women shared he should keep writing, because with their writing at the end of the confer- his books he could reach thousands in ence. the Jewish world. Rabbi Krohn noted, It was a productive, inspiring, and “There is no feeling like inspiring oth- memorable event. Special thanks to ers in writing.” this writer’s family, to all the newspa- He shared how he and his mother pers and people who helped publicize would look at sentences in a well-writ- it, including Mrs. Chanita Teitz, the ten newspaper and see how the writ- Queens Jewish Link, and to Mrs. Rivka er used few words to express an idea. Tova Weiss, Yardena, Mrs. Beth Gray, Rabbi Krohn taught, “We need to learn and to all the people who helped to how to use an expression that dances make this event possible.

56 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Community Corner • Recent Happenings Gush Etzion Kidnappings Loom Over Jerusalem Commemoration In Hillcrest

Left to Right: Rabbi Michael Miller, CEO JCRC of New York; Rabbi David Keehn, Vice President QJCC; Kevin Laufer, President of the YI of Hillcrest; Rabbi Dr. Richard Weiss, YI of Hillcrest; Hon. Queens Borough President Melinda Katz; Cynthia Zalisky, Executive Director QJCC; Rabbi Gerald Skolnick, Forest Hills Jewish Center Borough President Katz addresses the gathering By Sergey Kadinsky Borough President Katz spoke of grow- a family of six children. Eyal is a tennis are our brothers’ keepers.” ing up to her uncle’s stories of his experi- player who signed up to attend high Along with traditional songs for Jeru- mong the popular Jewish con- ences as a fi ghter in the 1948 War of In- school in a development town, “giving salem, Sharabi dedicated the Rodgers & cert singers based in Queens, Yoel dependence. “If we’re not talking about himself to others.” The third, Naftali, is Hammerstein classic “You’ll Never Walk ASharabi’s eclectic mix of Sephard- Israel, then who will? We’ve come to- a guitar player and baal k’riah who care- Alone” to the three teenagers. The audi- ic, Israeli, Klezmer and popular American gether in times of peace and we’ve come fully learned the weekly parshah. “The ence rose and left the synagogue with a tunes brings together a diverse audience. together in times of war.” In her years as code name for this operation is Broth- determination to increase their t’fi los on On his repertoire, the Celebrate Jerusa- State Assemblywoman and City Coun- er’s Keeper,” said Rabbi Miller. “All of us behalf of the boys. lem night at the Young Israel of Hillcrest cil Member, Katz traveled to Israel with is an annual tradition for Sharabi and the fellow lawmakers, seeing the narrow di- Queens Jewish community. This year’s mensions of its territory, the proximity commemoration, which took place June of its residents to the rocket launching 19, was co-sponsored by the Queens pads of Hamas and Hezbollah, and bring- Jewish Community Council, the Jewish ing their accounts home to constituents. Community Relations Council, Queens Being a communal event that tran- Borough President Melinda Katz, and the scended denominational boundaries, Metropolitan Council on Jewish Poverty. Rabbi Gerald C. Skolnik of the Forest Hills “It has become one of the most popular Jewish Center spoke of the terrorists as events on our synagogue’s calendar,” said “brutal oppressors.” At the same time, Kevin Leifer, president of the Young Is- we note how, throughout the Jewish rael of Hillcrest. “This event unites the life cycle, “joy is mitigated by concern,” Queens Jewish community. Jerusalem with the chupah being one example as a will always be the capital of Israel.” bridegroom celebrates his wedding while Yet the 47 years that passed since the mourning for the loss of the Holy Temple. reunifi cation of the holy city have not di- Rabbi Michael Miller, CEO of the Jew- minished the hostility expressed towards ish Community Relations Council of New Israel by the Arab nations as open warfare York (JCRC-NY), masterfully connected turned to terrorism and most recently the celebration of Jerusalem to current manifested in the kidnapping of Naftali events through his own experiences as a Fraenkel, Eyal Yifrach, and Gilad Shaar at student at Yeshivat Kerem B’Yavneh as the a hitchhiking post in Gush Etzion. While Six-Day War was taking place. “I remem- the number of Jewish missing and dead ber Jerusalem before its reunifi cation and has diminished, each life is valuable and have been basking in its glory ever since. worthy of the nation’s sympathy. Jerusalem is surrounded by mountains The rabbis and community leaders just as the Jewish people are by G-d.” spoke of the clear moral position of Is- During his time as a student in Jeru- rael in its mission of fi nding the teenag- salem, Rabbi Miller spoke of how city ers and bringing their captors to justice. residents looked south to a lone hilltop “Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik describes tree that signifi ed the loss of Gush Etzi- the concept of choice; there are no neu- on in the 1948 war. “When you celebrate tral actions,” said Rabbi Richard Weiss, the reunifi cation of Jerusalem, you cele- the Rav of the Young Israel of Hillcrest. brate Gush Etzion as well.” As the JCRC- “In order for k’dushah (sanctifi cation) to NY chair, Rabbi Miller receives briefi ngs exist, there must be a choice for good. on the kidnapping case from those fa- Our choice of celebration is recognition miliar with it, including the boys’ par- that Jerusalem was chosen by G-d and it ents. He spoke of Gilad as a Bnei Akiva is our choice to partner with Him.” youth counselor and baker coming from

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 57 Community Corner • Recent Happenings Touro College And Orthodox Union Announce Sarah Rivkah And Dr. Bernard Lander Zt”l Scholarships For Outstanding NCSY Graduates n Thursday, June 19, seven out- comes from the ranks of NCSY. This standing high school graduates well refl ects the unmatched emphasis Ofrom across the nation were that NCSY places on empowering and selected to receive the prestigious Sa- inspiring the next generation of Jewish rah Rivkah and Dr. Bernard Lander communal leadership.” zt”l Scholarship given jointly by Touro NCSY International Director Rabbi College and the National Conference Micah Greenland said that each schol- of Synagogue Youth (NCSY). The re- arship recipient’s “commitment to con- cipients are: Emma O’Quin of Tacoma, tinued personal growth and pursuit of Wash.; Caitlyn Franks of Baltimore, academic excellence is refl ected in his Md.; Jamie Epstein of Memphis, Tenn.; or her welcomed decision to attend Mariah Barber of Eugene, Ore.; Nicki [Touro’s Colleges]. Feerst of Long Beach, NY, Sara Lederer Dr. Bernard Lander served as presi- of Bergenfi eld, NJ, and Natasha Zucker dent of Touro for almost 40 years, until of Minneapolis, Minn. his passing on February 8, 2010, at the Touro College, which has long en- age of 94. He built Touro from a fl edg- joyed a close working relationship ling institution with only 35 students with the Orthodox Union, offers schol- Dr. Bernard zt”l and Sarah Rivkah Lander in 1971 to an educational powerhouse arships to outstanding NCSY graduates with more than 18,000 undergradu- who choose to attend one of Touro’s and CEO Dr. Alan Kadish and Orthodox cant link between the Orthodox Union ate and graduate students across the Lander Colleges in New York City – Union President Martin Nachimson. and Touro College,” noting that NCSY United States and in Israel, Germany, Lander College for Men in Queens, “Dr. Lander always insisted that Tou- also offers scholarship assistance that France, and Russia, making Touro the Lander College for Women/The Anna ro offer scholarship opportunities to enables these exceptional future lead- largest not-for-profi t independent Ruth and Mark Hasten School in Man- outstanding NCSY leaders,” Dr. Kadish ers to attend school in Israel prior to institution of higher and profession- hattan, and Lander College of Arts & said. “We have presented over two mil- enrolling in one of the Lander Colleges. al education under Jewish auspices. Sciences in Flatbush. NCSY is the in- lion dollars in such scholarships over Marion Stoltz-Loike, Dean of LCW- Touro and its affi liates offer superior ternational youth arm of the Orthodox the years, and it is only appropriate The Anna Ruth and Mark Hasten yeshivah and other Torah educational Union. that these scholarships bear Dr. Land- School, commented on the meaning- opportunities, along with myriad of The scholarships, in memory of Tou- er’s name and the name of his beloved ful bond that exists between the OU’s undergraduate, graduate, and profes- ro’s Founding President Dr. Bernard wife, Sarah Rivkah.” NCSY and Touro College. “Year after sional degree programs for the general Lander zt”l and his wife Sarah Rivkah, Mr. Nachimson added, “These schol- year, it is hardly a surprise that a large population. were announced by Touro President arships represent yet another signifi - portion of our student leadership Touro College Interim Dean Dr. Sabra Brock Named “Top Woman In Business” n Monday, June 16, Dr. Sabra Brock, interim the prestige and quality that is Touro.” dean of the Graduate School of Business Dr. Brock joined Touro as a professor at its New (GSB) at Touro College in New York City, was York School of Career and Applied Studies (NYSCAS) in O th named a 2014 honoree at the 12 Annual Top Woman June 2007 and was named interim dean of the GSB in in Business Awards and Networking event sponsored 2012. Her notable accomplishments since joining the by The Queens Courier. business school include the introduction of a new ca- The event, held at Terrace on the Park in Flush- reer center; re-launching the master’s degree program ing Meadows Park, celebrated women with careers in accounting; increasing inter- and intra-school com- in fi nance, healthcare, education, and entrepreneur- munication and collaboration; and creating higher ship whose major achievements and participation visibility for the GSB with programs such as monthly in the Queens community has helped the borough open houses. Under her tenure, the school has in- grow. Brock was pleased to have received the award creased its enrollment by more than nine percent and and felt it would raise awareness about the educa- the diversity of its faculty by 30 percent. tional opportunities that the Touro Graduate School Dr. Brock earned her PhD in business education of Business provides to students who live in and from New York University and a master’s degree in around Queens. advertising from Northwestern University. Her re- “Being named ‘top’ in your fi eld is always an hon- search interests include collaborative learning in or,” said Dr. Brock. “I’ve worked in business my business schools and the workplace, cross-cultural whole adult life. A number of our students live in teaching, and managing change through transfor- Queens and we would like to have more. As per the mative learning. She has been widely published in Touro College mission statement, we are particularly a presenter, along with Stephanie Jill Chernick, “Ms. scholarly journals. Her most recent book, “At the In- proud that many of our students come from under- New York United States 2014.” Proceeds raised during tersection of Communication, Marketing, and Trans- served communities. The ethnic/nationality pro- the evening’s celebration were donated to charity. formation,” was published in 2013. She also writes fi le of Queens is a good match to our student body, Victoria Schneps-Yunis, chief executive offi cer of on gender relationships. Her book, “Men Head East, which comes from diverse cultural and educational The Courier, said she was “thrilled” that Dr. Brock was Women Turn Right” has been translated into fi ve lan- backgrounds,” she said. an honoree. “With the glass ceiling tough to break guages and converted to an e-book under the title: “I Close to 1,000 people attended the event, which through, our Top Woman in Business has achieved a Say This, You Say That.” Writing mystery novels is a honored the work of more than 30 women. Greg Kel- crack in that ceiling by being appointed to Touro as hobby for Dr. Brock, and she has published several ly, co-anchor of Fox 5’s “Good Day New York,” was a dean,” she said, adding, “Her leadership will add to under a pseudonym in collaboration with colleagues.

58 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Community Corner • Recent Happenings EMET Celebrates 10-Year Anniversary At Dinner

n Wednesday night, June 18, adults back to Torah observance. Their to reintroduce a Jew back to Torah, and tain the growth of their organization EMET celebrated its ten-year mission is “to spread the beauty and EMET has been blessed to make this and still manage to maintain personal Oanniversary with a dinner, in- relevance of Judaism and Torah to introduction with thousands of young relationships with every student? The cluding all the trimmings, hosted at young adults yearning to discover and adults. Many of Rabbi Rutenberg’s and simple answer is that they care about Da Mikele Illagio in Elmhurst. It was connect to their heritage.” The organi- Rabbi Kraft’s students have matured every Jewish soul. They don’t give up a night of inspiration, education, and zation has found unparalleled success and found their marriage partners over on any student. They fi nd a way to recognition. Five couples were chosen through their effective personal ap- the years. “EMET has infl uenced our connect to every n’shamah. “EMET for their exemplary roles in the organi- proach to outreach. Rabbi Mordechai lives and the lives of our children in is the only place I know where I can zation and their respective communi- Kraft and Rabbi Akiva Rutenberg orig- limitless ways. In a world fi lled with walk in and feel such warmth and love ties. The honorees were brought into inally founded EMET as a collegiate loss and confusion, EMET provides its from everyone,” says Diana Starayeva, the spotlight for their elegant display outreach organization. They started members with a source of spirituali- an EMET student. The rabbis at EMET of leadership, kindness, and dedica- by organizing events at college cam- ty and calmness. It has built homes, have taken to leading their students tion to excellence in serving their by setting good examples. “The EMET communities. One of the honorees family has truly embraced us since the awarded at the dinner was EMET’s The Rabbis don’t give up on any student. very fi rst time we attended the Fel- own staff member Sara Basiratmand. lowship Program at Beth Gavriel. The Sara joined EMET almost ten years ago They find a way to connect to every n’shamah rabbis have served as role models and as a student at Queensborough Com- mentors in providing the necessary munity College and is now program tools to help mold us into an obser- coordinator for EMET. Sara was hon- puses and have since grown from their bonded a community, and uplifted our vant Jewish couple that can now better ored for her passionate devotion to humble beginnings to include immer- generation in every way possible. To understand and appreciate the beauty the EMET students and her ensuring sive Shabbatons through the tri-state be part of a group that so challenged in Judaism. We are both grateful and that every EMET event is an outstand- area, outings including skiing, barbe- and refi ned us as a people is truly a thankful to EMET for their support, ing success. When she graciously ac- cues, and retreats to Miami, as well as blessing,” said Marlena and Rafael love, and guidance in paving the true cepted her award, it became evident trips to Israel. Elazar. In recognition of the growing path for us that we wish to continue that she was truly deserving of it, as After ten years of successful out- number of students who are now mar- forward with our own family,” said she received a standing ovation and reach, the rabbis and staff at EMET ried and have families of their own Dana and Jarred Friedman. was showered with praise and cheers have nurtured relationships with (over 300 couples), EMET launched a EMET is not simply about teaching by the EMET students who were pre- thousands of dedicated followers. couples division to provide continued concepts to eager young minds; EMET sent at the dinner. Over 700 people graced the dining support for their students during the is all about showing one how a To- EMET Outreach is an organization hall with their presence to show their next phase of their lives. rah-observant lifestyle is interesting, that has chosen the noble yet monu- support for a group of people who What is the formula for their suc- mental task of bringing Jewish young changed their lives. It is no small feat cess? How do the rabbis at EMET sus- CONTINUED ON P. 60

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 59 Masbia Queens Breakfast Sunday, June 15, Kew Gardens Hills Photo credits: Yaakov Katz

Ride, Captain, Ride EMET Celebrates 10-Year Anniversary At Dinner CONTINUED FROM P. 49 became neurotic that something CONTINUED FROM P. 59 For the past ten years, EMET has would happen to their children if provided immeasurable support to yet people from my generation rode left unattended, and were afraid to vibrant, dynamic, and spiritually up- the Bukharian Jewish community. as children and are still riding as let them out of their sight. This also lifting. The rabbis provide a glimpse EMET has helped thousands of young adults. applied to letting their children ride into their family lives, they offer a fo- adults learn the values and laws that The second reason given is that ex- their bikes on their own. If the child rum for intelligent debate, and they Jews have defended with their lives, ercise has been de-emphasized in the was lucky, he would be allowed to go offer the guidance of a wise and gen- meet their life partners, make life- schools. Some schools have either around the corner. How boring was tle friend. Students are given time to long friends, learn the meaning of eliminated gym or reduced the num- that. If he or she went past the cor- digest all the information and are en- prayer, discover their Jewish identi- ber of hours. That could explain the ner, the parents would get all excit- couraged to take the necessary steps ty, and build Jewish families. EMET lack of exercise as it relates to other ed. Therefore, children did not like to grow in a healthy and natural way, stands as a symbol of hope for all the physical activities. However, bike to bicycle and, not surprisingly, they without feeling pressured or forced Jewish people to return to a Torah-ob- riding was not an activity in gym. have little interest as adults. into anything that doesn’t feel right. servant lifestyle. EMET’s students I believe that the lack of partici- The irony is that when I was grow- As history has shown us, a Jew and staff are like a large expanding pation by those 25 and younger is ing up, the city’s crime rate and in without Torah will eventually lose his family that fi nds comfort in its spiri- caused by what I call the “Etan Patz particular the murder rate was high- Jewish identity and assimilate into tual growth. EMET is a shining exam- Syndrome.” In 1979, Etan Patz, a six- er. Yet, as was typical, I was able to his host culture. EMET has shown it- ple for all Jews that Torah observance year-old boy who lived in lower Man- ride all over. self to be a capable organization that is possible in communities that have hattan, was abducted on his way to We have to change our mindset can fi ght assimilation with a mixture lost their guiding light. It takes a few school and then killed. A generation and encourage more bicycling by our of love, attention, education, guid- brave souls to reignite that light and of parents who remember the case children, our friends, and ourselves. ance, and unfl inching dedication. bring the Jews back.

60 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 61 Socially Savvy Esti Berkowitz Studio 18 Medi Spa Celebrates Grand Opening With Beauty Solutions That Really Are Skin Deep

Photo credits: Yaakov Katz/QJL n every given day, our sched- First was the sheitel styling area. While In the beginning, Ksenia went to school diet. This was not only food related, but ules have us running around Elana works in sheitel styling, the main to be a doctor in Haifa. While she loved also a breakdown of the amount of sleep Odoing things for everybody else. stylist, Esti, comes in from Boro Park. studying medicine, she also had two ba- and type of utensils they used to cook Whether it be babysitting, taking care This way they can meet the demands of bies at home to take care of. Once her their food in. Ksenia would develop a of aging parents, or cleaning the home, the simchah season with ease. Elana also babies were a bit older, she went on to healthier regimen to achieve ultimate one of the most important things doesn’t sells sheitels made from European hair. get her RN at Beit Cholim Wolfson in Is- beauty on the inside and out. In fact, all even make it on the list: taking care of I was extremely impressed with the se- rael. Now an RN, she decided to add to of the services at Studio 18 Medi Spa are ourselves. This is so often overlooked, lection she had on display at very afford- her degree and also get her license as an provided with the utmost expertise and but not if you walk into Studio 18 Medi able prices. I was also shown the special esthetician. Her love of medicine and professionalism. That is why they have Spa, located at 71-40 Main Street, in our rooms in the back, including the mas- beauty were now blended together and a plastic surgeon on board to come in, a very own Kew Gardens Hills. I had the sage room, facial room, laser and waxing she continued to add to her techniques. couple of times of week, to perform an- chance to speak with the innovators be- room, and the doctor’s room. I was really While living in Vienna, Austria, where ti-aging services, including Botox, Fillers, hind this new center for all things beauty impressed by the detail and choice of col- Elana was born, Ksenia went to beauty Peals, Pigmentation Rejuvenation with last week. The storefront has a very mod- ors in each room. It looks like the entire school and studied skincare techniques. Photo Facial, and Nose Correction. ern look with large glass windows and family knows about creating the ultimate She would apply these techniques to I was so impressed when I also heard vertical blinds. Once inside, length and spa and beauty experience. Ksenia’s sons, each individual client she had. that Laser Hair Removal can be painless depth of the store is spacious, with mod- Boris and Rubin, were the creative team It is this approach that Ksenia used with the machine in the laser and waxing ern chairs and light fi xtures all around. I behind it. even after she moved to the United room. Every skin service is performed immediately felt a sense of serenity and After the brief tour, I was back near States. Since she had trained in beauty with the care of the individual client in calm. My eyes were drawn to a line of the makeup station. Elana is not only an application as well, she was hired by the mind. As Ksenia explained to me, there makeup I had never heard of before, Il incredible hair stylist, she is a licensed Elite Model Agency as a beauty consul- is not just one solution for one type of Makiage. Farther into the store was an makeup artist as well. The Il Makiage tant. She also worked with some very oily skin. It is this additional focus and impressive display of sheitels, beautifully brand is used, which Elana’s mother well-known actors and actresses includ- concern for each client that I found so styled. I felt like a kid in a candy store Ksenia introduced during her years as a ing Sylvester Stallone, Grace Jones, Mar- valuable at Studio 18 Medi Spa. While and I wanted one of everything. While makeup stylist. This makeup consists lo Thomas, and Diana Ross. She would these services can often be very expen- I was dreaming of a new sheitel, the of colors that, when blended together, even travel to some of their homes to sive, they are offered at very reasonable owner, Elana Kaufman, introduced her- create the most incredible results I have provide special skincare treatments. rates here. I just love that they offer self to me. Next to her was her mother, ever seen. The way that this makeup is While she loved her work, things at special bridal packages with a full day of Ksenia Benyaminov. I was afraid they applied can actually change the contour home were changing for Ksenia. She had pampering for the kallah. There are even might tell me everything wrong with of the face. The combination of these become more religious and wanted to times when certain services, like makeup my skin, or pressure me to buy a sheitel elements, along with Elana’s expertise, focus more on working with the women for a kallah, will be donated because a out of my price range. What actually creates exceptional results. Elana also in her community back in Kew Gardens family would not be able to afford it oth- happened was quite the contrary: They trained as a paramedic esthetician. This is Hills. It is from this time period that she erwise. This is just one of the many ways were interested in me. I found this very no surprise, as Ksenia has always concen- introduced Il Makiage makeup to these Ksenia and Elana put their heart into ev- refreshing, as I had just been in a salon trated on the biological, medical, and sci- women. She wanted to help women erything they do. They feel that it is their and I felt like everything about me was entifi c components that affect the skin. not only achieve beauty on the outside, job to help make women feel good from being examined. I could tell right away Ksenia grew up in a home surrounded by but keep that beauty alive long after the the inside to the outside. that both Elana and Ksenia were not in talk of medicine and science. Her father makeup had been washed off. Ksenia Ksenia explained to me that every- the business of beauty to sell immediate was a physics professor who wrote over would sit with each of her clients and thing around us can have an effect on fi xes, but rather to create lasting relation- 200 textbooks on the topics of science ask questions that would help her get ships based on making their clientele feel and math. Ksenia’s mother was a biology a better understanding of their current CONTINUED ON P. 65 good from the inside out. teacher, and her uncle was a physician. I was invited to take a tour and learn It has been over 30 years since Ksenia Esti Berkowitz blogs about how she found kosher food, a husband, and had kids about the different services provided. started her career in the beauty business. after 35 at www.primetimeparenting.com.

62 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Estee Kafra, author of three best-selling cookbooks, Dishes runs KosherScoop.com, an interactive website Delectable with all the latest and greatest in kosher cooking, featuring over 1,000 recipes. Estee Kafra, kosherscoop.com

Gourmet Flavored Breaded Salmon Skewers Cupcakes With Grilled Vegetables Yield: 4 servings as a main dish Ingredients: extract of your choice - 1 tsp or 6 to 8 servings as an appetizer eggs - 6 Buttercream Frosting: Ingredients: sugar - 1½ cups confectioner’s sugar - 4 cups 4 fi llets salmon (6 oz each), 2 Tbsp fresh lemon juice fl our - 2 cups butter or margarine - 1 cup, thinly sliced (no skin) Grilled Vegetables vanilla extract - 1 tsp room temp 1 cup seasoned corn 2 large red onions baking powder - 2 tsp milk or soy milk - 2 tbsp fl ake crumbs 3 medium bell peppers oil - ½ cup extract of your choice - 1 tsp Marinade/Sauce (any preferred colors) orange juice - 2/3 cup food coloring 4 Tbsp mustard ¼ cup olive oil 4 Tbsp honey Kosher salt Instructions: ½ cup extra-virgin olive oil Freshly ground black pepper Preheat oven to 350°. Prepare cupcake or muffi n tins with desired cupcake liners. (See note.) Instructions: Beat the eggs and sugar until light and airy. Add re- Rinse salmon and pat dry. Cut into approximately 1-inch 1 chunks. Place crumbs in a re-sealable plastic bag. maining ingredients, alternating between dry and wet ingredients. Fill each cupcake holder about 2/3 1 Combine mustard, honey, olive oil, and lemon 2 juice in a bowl and mix. Reserve half to use later full. Bake for 25 minutes, or until tops are just set and bounce 2as a sauce. Place pieces of salmon into remaining back when lightly touched. Remove from oven, preferably marinade and mix to coat all sides. Cover well. Refrigerate half before they brown. an hour or overnight. 3 Preheat oven to 375° F. Note: I really like the cupcake liners that are made of parch- ment paper as the cupcakes don’t stick to them and they peel Roll each piece of salmon in corn fl ake crumbs and away nicely. 3 place on a baking sheet (or baking dish) lined with 4parchment paper. Bake for 12 minutes. Allow to Buttercream Frosting: cool. Before serving, place 2 to 3 pieces of salmon onto tooth- In the bowl of an electric mixer fi tted with the beater at- picks or a wooden skewer by piercing each piece in the center. tachment, whip the butter or margarine with the sugar. Meanwhile, prepare grilled vegetables. Preheat oven to Beat until combined, and add milk and extract. Beat until broil. 1 Thinly slice the red onion into round discs and the an even consistency is reached (You may need to add a bit more 5 sugar if the mixture is too soft). Add just a bit of food coloring peppers into round fl ower-shaped slices. (To make (See note) and mix again until well blended. 6pepper fl owers, cut away the stem from the top of Place icing into a disposable or reusable piping bag fi tted the pepper and then remove seeds from the center. Cut slices with a large star tip. Pipe around the circumference of the of pepper clockwise into rings.) cupcake and continue the circular motion, getting smaller Place onions and pepper rounds on a baking sheet lined 2 with parchment paper and drizzle with olive oil. Sprin- and smaller until a point is reached. You may refrigerate, but serve at room temperature. To make colored sugar, simply mix 7kle with kosher salt and pepper. Broil for 12 minutes or a dab of food coloring with course sugar and mix well. Sprinkle until starting to blacken. To serve, pile the onion and peppers over top. into a small mound in the center of the plate and prop a salm- Makes enough to ice approximately 14 cupcakes on skewer up against it. Drizzle with reserved marinade. Can Note: Only a tiny bit of food coloring is necessary when us- be served warm or at room temperature. ing the gel type. Use a toothpick to add very small amounts. NOTE: You can prepare the marinated salmon pieces ahead You can always add, but you can’t take away! of time and freeze them unbaked. Bake the salmon the day you are serving them and serve at room temperature.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 63 64 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 The Informed Woman • Beauty Briefs Risselle Naimark Read My Lips

here’s no doubt about it: Women like to make the focal point of the face everywhere love lipstick. In fact, if and play that up. There is one excep- A brush works well Tyou give a woman a small purse tion, however. If you’re very pale, you when applying matte that can only hold one item, chances are need heavier eye makeup to carry off a lipstick, especially she’d put a lipstick in it. Why? Because strong lip color, which will help create intense shades most women are passionate about color harmony and balance. and wearing lipstick is a quick and inex- Plump It Up. For lips that look fuller, pensive way to indulge their passion. In try a lighter or brighter shade of lipstick, fact, it’s the best-sold cosmetic, because it’s since dark colors can make thin lips ap- all about emotion and impulse. A lipstick pear even thinner. You can also add lip can lead to a whole new look. So is there gloss to the center of the lower lip. It a color that looks best on a woman based refl ects light and gives the appearance on age, skin tone or lip shape? Some of fullness. experts will tell you that there are rules Make A Lip Color Matte. After apply- you must live by, but I feel that a wom- ing lipstick, place a one-ply tissue over an should wear what she likes and what your lips and brush a little powder on makes her feel and look prettiest. The fol- top of them. This can turn any lipstick lowing are some tips for getting the best into a matte formula and can be an al- results from your lipstick application. ternate to a lip sealer. Regularly Exfoliate Your Lips. Be- Show Off A Glow. Go for tawny Before going to sleep, exfoliate your lips by using Make a colorful splash by coordinating fore going to sleep, exfoliate your lips based lipstick to brighten bronzed skin a washcloth, toothbrush or Buf-Puf your lipstick with your nail polish by using a washcloth, toothbrush or and make fair complexions look a little Buf-Puf, then follow with a coat of lip sun-kissed. Risselle Naimark is a Professional Freelance Makeup Artist and Skincare Consult- balm or vitamin E stick. This prevents Double Duty. The great thing about ant. She carries an extensive line of personalized skincare, cosmetics, and anti-aging matte lipstick from sticking to every lit- lip-gloss is you can wear it alone for a products. Risselle is also available for weddings, Bar Mitzvahs, makeup lessons, and tle crack and fl ake. natural but shiny look or as a top lay- all of your beauty needs. She can be reached at 718 263-5517. Outline Your Lips. This will prevent er over lipstick. For glossed perfection, lipstick from bleeding into the fi ne use a lip pencil to outline and fi ll in the lines around the mouth that are caused entire lip for picture-perfect color that by aging or sun damage. You will there- won’t feather or bleed. fore want to draw your lips with a lip Colorful Tips. Make a colorful splash pencil or automatic retractable liner, by coordinating your lipstick with your before you apply color. This must-have nail polish and matching it to an outfi t. item can glide on easily and invisibly As long as it doesn’t clash, you’re fi ne. outside the lip line, acting as a barrier Avoid A Matte Look If Your Skin Is to help keep lip color in place. That’s a Excessively Oily Or Dry. If you fall into big benefi t, since a cleaner lip can give any of these categories, you will want a woman a more polished and younger to create a dewy lip by using a creamy look. lipstick or using a gloss thereafter. By Use A Brush For Control. This works contrast, matte lips emphasize the well when applying matte lipstick, es- shine on an oily complexion and make pecially intense shades. Cover smudges it appear greasier, while dry skin will ac- or bleeding color with concealer. tually look older. If your skin is normal, Emphasize Your Lips Or Your Eyes. you can probably sport any lipstick for- You can decide which feature you’d mula.

choices served in abundance in our Studio 18 Medi Spa community have a negative impact on the behavior of children. The amount CONTINUED FROM P. 62 of food dyes, sugar, and other unhealth- ful ingredients taste great to them, but our skin, even beyond the food we eat. the aftereffects are disastrous. While I was not surprised to learn that Ksenia Studio 18 Medi Spa is a place for women provides classes on living a healthier to rejuvenate, Ksenia and Elana also fi ll lifestyle. She is always continuing her their conversations with resourceful in- research and stays up to date with the formation on how the entire family can latest news about molecular and cell have a healthier lifestyle. Next time you biology via Harvard Medical School and are considering a treat for yourself or a the Karlinsky Institute publications. I friend, take a step into Studio 18 Medi could speak with Ksenia for hours not Spa and speak to Ksenia or Elana. You just about beauty above and below the will fi nd yourself in a place that will skin, but children. We both agreed that have you feeling beautiful on the inside the amount of candy and poor snack and out.

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 65 66 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 The Informed Woman • Style Myths Debunked Meira E. Schneider-Atik Myth: If you’re going through a time of stress, it doesn’t matter how you look. Truth: It DOES matter how you look, in more ways than one.

s individuals, we often have our self and about your situation. It really is times of stress. Maybe you’re un- empowering. I remember the story of a Aemployed and need a job. Maybe woman who wore a business suit to take you’re single and looking for your bash- the bar exam. She wanted to see herself ert. Maybe you’re married but you want as a lawyer, and it helped her feel just children. Maybe you have children and right (Yes, she passed). they’re just driving you crazy (That’s nor- There is nothing wrong with dressing mal, by the way). Maybe you’re older and “comfortable and functional,” but you retired and have health issues. As a na- need to keep things fi tted and fl attering. tion, we have our times of stress. Right I already addressed this in a previous col- now, we’re all davening for our boys, but umn about casual clothes, and I will be Fun accessories will make you smile and remind you of who you really are and why you need there are always other things. going over a few points while adding a to be confident Recently, my rabbi said that even as we few new ones. daven and worry for our boys, we should If you’re dressing for a casual situa- I have that with my mitpachot and jewel- to express your true self – does not have not postpone celebrations. That would tion, like running errands or taking your ry, and it does work. to go away just because you’re going If you have a special occasion, make through stress. If anything, it will make the effort to go, even if you’re stressed. you feel better. And in times of national True tz’nius does not have to go away just because you’re going It will allow you to come out of your- stress, every mitzvah counts. Plus, when self for at least a short time. Get dressed you dress with true tz’nius, you make a through stress. If anything, it will make you feel better fancy and special and look your absolute kiddush Hashem, and that makes a huge best. Your BBD/BBST will make you look difference. and feel taller and slimmer. Add a show- May our mitzvot be z’chuyot for our allow evil to win. Instead, we should children to the playground, then yes, stopper piece of jewelry and great heels, boys Yaakov Naftali ben Rachel Devorah, build monuments to good. you need to dress “functional.” It’s okay and you’ll feel even better. Gilad Michael ben Bat-Galim, and Eyal From me, you get the truth. to wear a jeans skirt, t-shirt, and cotton True tz’nius – using your appearance ben Iris Teshurah. “Hiding” your body, fi gure, and per- hat/beret/mitpachat and be comfortable. sonality under bad clothes does nothing Just make sure that your skirt is an A-line to relieve stress. If anything, it makes it or straight shape, not too big and wide. Make sure your t-shirt fi ts your torso without looking like spray paint. And do stick with hats, berets, or mitpachot because those are much more fl attering. Plus, if you are just running around, it’s okay to wear sneakers; but if you’re shop- ping for clothes, make sure you wear plain fl ats (If your fl ats have thick sneak- er bottoms, so much the better). If you’re dressing for work, you need to dress “professional.” This means dif- ferent things in different workplaces, but the key words are “polished” and “professional.” In some workplaces, a suit is necessary, but in others, you may be able to wear denim. And others call for a balance between the two. Make If you’re dressing for a casual situation, like sure your work look allows you to fi t in running errands or taking your children to the well while still allowing for some indi- playground, then it’s okay to wear a jeans skirt vidual expression. Do wear one or two fun accessories to personalize your out- worse. When you dress “tired,” you feel fi ts, but not more. tired. When you dress “fat,” you feel fat Fun accessories, by the way, are very (even if you’re actually thin). Even worse, important, especially when you’re under this kind of sloppy dressing is exactly stress. First of all, they’ll make you smile, the kind of thing that makes tz’nius so which automatically relieves stress. Sec- off-putting to so many people, including ond, they remind you of who you really fashion gurus. are and why you need to be confi dent. By contrast, when you dress “attrac- Third, they can serve as icebreakers with tive,” you look and feel better about your- other people and generate compliments.

Meira E. Schneider-Atik is a wardrobe organizer and personal shopper. She helps women weed out their wardrobes, shop smartly, put together outfi ts, and save time, ef- fort, and money, all within tz’nius. Her writing on fashion and style within tz’nius has been published both in print and online. She is also a jewelry designer and co-founder of RenaMei Jewelry – Designed Just for You. Her pieces can be seen on www.etsy.com (just look up RenaMei). She can be reached at 718-644-6135 or at [email protected].

28 Sivan 5774 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] 67 Side-Splitting Stand-Up

“Amazon introduced its own “A bill has been introduced “A new study says Facebook “The World Cup is underway. smartphone. You can tell it’s that would reduce the speed lim- users can be affected by the A lot of World Cup soccer play- from Amazon because after you it in New York City to 25 miles mood of their friends. For exam- ers have been faking injuries to hang up with someone, Amazon per hour, while cab drivers are ple, if your friend is depressed on draw a penalty from the other just being asked to keep all four Facebook, you’ll be depressed. suggests other people you might team. Meanwhile, a lot of Ameri- wheels on the ground.” And if they’re really happy on want to call.” cans have been faking following – Conan O’Brien – Seth Myers Facebook, you’ll be even more depressed.” the World Cup.” “According to a new report, – Jimmy Fallon –Conan O’Brien “A messaging app that is capa- Yahoo! has more diversity in its ble of sending and receiving only staff than Google. Meanwhile, the word ‘Yo’ raised $1 million Bing is still just the one guy.” “Over the weekend Afghanistan from investors. It’s too bad they – Seth Myers couldn’t see the whole message, held its presidential election run-off. which was, ‘Yo, this is a bad in- “Yesterday, the Iranian presi- The way it works is everyone runs off, vestment.’” dent tweeted a picture of himself and whoever’s slowest – Seth Myers all alone watching a World Cup has to be president of Afghanistan.” game on television. Yeah, then he “Over the weekend Starbucks watched his favorite show — ‘It’s – Seth Meyers announced a new program that Always Sunni in Philadelphia.’” will pay employees to take on- –Conan O’Brien line classes at Arizona State. Said Starbucks employees, ‘We al- “Queen Elizabeth is plan- ready went there. That’s why we “President Obama is sending ning to visit the set of “Game work at Starbucks.’” a couple hundred troops to Iraq. of Thrones” next week. She said – Seth Myers We spent six years trying to figure a way things are hard to keep track of to get out of Iraq. And now we’re back. because everyone keeps dying. “Clippers owner Donald Ster- And then Prince Charles said, ling is getting some much-need- But this time Barack Obama has an exit strategy. In 2016, he’s gone.” ‘Not everyone.’” ed R & R. That’s racism and relax- – Jimmy Fallon ation.” – David Letterman – Jimmy Kimmel “President Obama’s approval rating in the U.S. is at its low- “Protesters est point ever, 41 percent. After at the World Cup got into trouble “The doctor said Obama passed hearing this, the president said, his physical. That’s the fi rst thing ‘When did I become less popu- for burning American flags. he’s passed in the second term.” lar in this country than soccer? –David Letterman How did that happen?’” It’s a shame because children in China –Conan O’Brien worked very hard to make those flags.” “A big movie opened today. – Conan O’Brien I’m very excited about it. “Jersey “Over the weekend, President Boys.” It’s based on the Broadway Obama got his annual presiden- play. It’s about the hot musical tial physical. His cholesterol is group all the kids love — Frankie up and his approval rating is Valli and the Four Seasons.” down.” – Craig Ferguson – David Letterman

68 QueensJewishLink.com • 917.549.6145 • [email protected] June 26, 2014 Crossword Puzzle

Across Down SOLUTION WILL APPEAR IN NEXT ISSUE. 1. Knowledgeable person in a particular field (6) 1. Oar (6) 3. Receive something offered (6) 2. Not at any time (5) Solutions to last issue’s puzzles 8. Circuitous (7) 4. Aquatic South American rodent (5) 10. Luxury craft (5) 5. Leave out (7) 11. Prominent (5) 6. Aggregates (6) 12. Out of the ordinary (7) 7. Progeny (5) 13. In front (5) 9. Last letter of the Greek alphabet (5) 15. Felt pain (5) 14. Emaciated (7) 20. Frequent patron (7) 16. Item of furniture (5) 22. Mindful (5) 17. Colonnade (6) 24. Once more (5) 18. Juicy fruit (5) 25. Imbue (7) 19. Breakfast food (6) 26. Firstborn (6) 21. Parts of a chain (5) 27. Request for a sum of money (6) 23. Die away (5) SOLUTION WILL APPEAR IN NEXT ISSUE.

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