°" PRIVATE BREGER ABROAD Analyst Walter Winchell Bro ww UPTON CLOSE pRETTY bobby-soxer* lugging customer enters with a gal who exporter Peter Manasae of it is: We have nothing grave doubts as to whether or ance of an administration which ' * his ever could only continue to lose the lunch 'xmes to the Para- isn’t wife—the headwaiter Uruguay. They will wed in June rUEto fear. Today s election not his administration can customary tide of en- again command general respect support of Congress and hasn't mount—eo they can survive sit- doesn’t give him the . . . The gazettes didn't report could lease such a sign of recognition. ergy and optimism throughout and establish a national disci- a hope in the world of increas- ting through a half-dozen shows about Sinatra being the target ing or preserving Celeb fanatics ogling first- this land as would give this na- pline. that support . . . of respect worshipping King Sinatra nighters entering the theater—- ass apple-thrower the other tion a rocket-push to victory, Should Truman be elected, the of the American Jitterbug, almond-eyed young- getting by star- night during his show. A group and a rebirth of working ac- the primitive, brazen-political people at large. more of a thrill ethics which he has declared of • • e sters in Chinatown—completely ing at biggies than first-night- of bobby-soxers waited outside tivity that would make it once more the land where any one taking help from any anti- MAN can promise 60,000,- Americanized. ers get from the shows. the Stork for Sinatra the other underwriting • • 9 night. patron can make a living—can work Americanism and NO000 Jobe unless they are the To an exciting • An old artist copying maiter- and speak and play as he bossism as a principle of Amei kind of Jobs that Stalin gives donegan, one said: . pieces in the Museum of Art. 20- wishes-~the land without fear. lean life wifi poison his ad- his people in Russia, and that la Dorothy , , , year-old boogie-woogie pi- "What's Frankie doing?” courage is ministration. not good enough Uiis hands are shaky, so he is eating,” This energy and for the Ameri- anist, made $35 a week m Chi- "He said the patron now up by fear; fear of His early Ku Klux Klan con- can worker. The Wallace and . tied . . “What's . . . Steadies his brush by gripping it cago about a year ago. She now he eating?” bureaucrats, fear of political re- nection is a spot, which like Maverick clan for industrial with both hands. The handicap, earns 50 times that doubling “OUvea” ... “Oooh!” exclaimed prisals, stations Lady Mac Beth, he can never operation war the moron, yon go fear by radio PWA of plants is however, doesn’t seem to affect between the Zanzibar and “Star “won’t please and networks that their fran- wash cleanly awhy. the death sentence on private back In there bring me the • • • his excellent canvases. Time” . . . Joe E. Lewis, the and chises will be canceled, fear in initiative in the United States. by pigeons pita?” • • • Crowds fascinated Copa Jester, says our navy now workmen of their labor union VIWITHOUT"" the establishment nibbling at bread-crumbs. Prov- challenges the Jap navy to come • • • bosses, fear of loss of orders, now of a national discipline FTTHE Issue of the election la ing again that almost anything up and flght! BUDDY EBSEN (Ruth loss of Jobs. and co-operation between the A whether or not the Ameri- can attract a mob in the Big Chrystal Dunninger, who the MRS.Cambridge, the column's • • • White House and Congress, this can people wish to strike out Burg . . . Germans in Yorkville courts decided is the wife of the first Girl Friday) has departed Roosevelt be re- at ion faces chaos for a while. and try to find their own way saloons sippine their beer. These mindreader, will now sue him for Las Vegas for g divorce. SHOULDelected, the damage to his That chaos could end in military In the postwar disillusionment—- spots used to Be Bund hangouts. for divorce, naming A. J. as co- Her next groom will be G. H. prestige caused by campaign rule for a while. Martial law try to find something better—or Now big signs urge customers respondent . . . Stalin’s favorite Votteler Jr., an exec In com- revelations such as the gay de- coum tip over into fascism. whether they choose to leave not discuss the war or poli- viewed, to smoking tobacco is DunhiU’s mercial aviation . . . The cur- fense of the Thousand-Dollar Historically the surest everything to “Papa,” who took tics. A-7513, a very mild mixture rent Washington quip: Club and the unanswered Pearl way to bring fascism in Amer- them into this disillusionment. The dramatic contrast in first brought to him by Donald "The army and navy *E* la Harbor accusations will leave ica is to vote for the con tin u- Copyright, 1944, John W. Dill* Co. tawdry, sidestreet joynts: En- Nelson. the location flag for the Rene- —TIm D-trolt TIM tertainers consist of a mixture Miguelito Valdes, at La Conga gotiate rs !” hear they’re for him, for of has-beens and youngsters again, and Virginia Hill have “I recommendin' an award Red Skelton's cx-wife has conspicuous eatin' on the field of battle!" on with bright futures. resumed from where they never gone to a town near his army E. V. Durlevg Two mink-coated females left 6tt . . . Hirohito, say the camp to help him write and s if clawing each other in Grand wags, radio’d his admiral: produce weekly troop shows depot. was Central The battle . . wan for "Is you la or la you ain’t my there . Garbo and her man Pin-up Girls By Patterson To ate her to lovt her. barbed wire he waits some- are trying to think of a name incited by a political argument navy?" are here to start a chain of Love but her, and love forever. one to out him loose. pie in New York City. Members .. . The tactful headwaiter a * in Syleia Diamond of D. Alber’s health salons. They may buy an Had never loved sae kindly, circumstances, for It. How about “The Pocket snooty spot. When a regular press staff is now betrothed to estate at Dobbs Ferry. we Under simllsr Edition Club" Or the “Little, Had we never loved sae blindly, a horse will cut himself to But Oh My!’Club”? Never never parted. pieces trying to get free. Mary We had ne'er been broken• Mules have a great sense of United States employ- Haworth’S Mail hearted. humor. ALLment offices have a list of —Robert Burns. They plot lets of tricks »¦ 17,500 ways of making a living, DEAR MARY HAWORTH: want to men. ins. I get along with the to appease, a prurient interest MALES whose activity Mollerus Couperus of Los An* staff and Join in their fun. but I in sex debauchery. V/ many only that, they laugh recently came to calls tor waiting on Not up- geles has been suggested as • IHAVEWashington, D. C. from a am afraid they must think I Don’t think that their un- female cutamers which group is roariously when these tricks ge member of the My Name la a am a narrow minded, old fash- blushing exchange of bawdy country town to work for the more afflicted with “the Casa- ever. Poem Club. The MNIAP mem- government as secretary. ioned prig. levity Is customary among men nova complex?" committee, a Perhaps I am, but I was in see bership made up of The people in my office are and women the business This is what a young woman Hugh Blue, Bridget Prichett end young and a lot of fun, so that brought up in a good, church- world; and that you have to • of Manhattan asks. by: Marjorie Ram- Stanley Manley say Gou- going family where the facta of grin and bear it, or be marked PASSING-1 Mr. my work is very pleasant except She thinks it is the lunch beau. Originally from San perus la not eligible as his name thing. life are only discussed scientifi- as a prude and country bumpkin. Francisco which is the birth- for one cally. fact, counter attendants. has neither rhyme nor rhythm, The men and other girls are and not as a subject of As a matter of their Says she: **The confidence of place of more stars of the jest in mixed company. vulgarity is see continually trading "off color” tedious typical of soda Jerk or* as to their American stage and major true bumpkin at worst these stories. O. L. the his talent for Impressing and en- league baseball players than any MTJOW to Fascinate Woman* and coarsest.. Al Also, they attach the worst DEAR G. L.: dearing themselves to the fe- other city in the country. Mar- is a magazine article bf co-workers’ heavy traf- Don’t let them throw you on male sex Is How do jorie made her first hit in “Kick one Roger Roden, evidently possible meaning to my most the defensive about your frankly astonishing. a innocent remarks. YOURfic in lewd innuende and they get that way T" In." Shortly after that she mar- very young man. His advice le shocked reaction. As well apol- see ried the star and author of this exoep* All of this embarrasses me obscene mirth is a diluted form healthy, apol- all routine stuff with one to tears not of sex ogize for being as play, the colorful Willard Mack. tion. He fascinate Lalmost and I do depravity. ogize that sharp reflex, from clients, q. says to a to they doing to for clean Bill Corum. Genial sportspage hmow what do. What are the —that wholesome instinctive Your Mules £ Men Depart- woman a man should talk sadly Yesterday, for instance. I had accompaniment of hysterical Queries star. Have known many men to of a “lost love." That is, he is dis- recoil from the foul breath of ment seems to devote itself ex- have a race horse named after to leave the room twice to hide snickers this: They are a should talk along torch song my embarrassment. porting, and trying vicariously their degrading badinage. clusively to men. Let’s have them but Bill is the only man I You say you would like to get little about mules. lines of a female who has know of to whom this has hap- thrown him over. This tale, along with them and Join the ago sad A. With pleasure. pened twice. About six years says Mr. Roden, will arouse a fun, —if only you knew’ how to The mule Is a very interest- was a horse named Co- try. there maternal instinct and effect a compromise. Don’t ing animal. rum. Now there is a 2-year-old woman's Health intelligent purity a hope to trap the man on the Better Your *of An army mule costs $325, en- named Bill Corum. The most mind is a priceless asset. Cher- the army at the age of rebound. Our Horses St Women’s By Dr. Logan Clendening ters 5 successful American horse Dept, strongly question ish it proudly. and retires at SO. named after a man was Mike experts Th« Detroit limes technique. However, they very flattering to have or something bitter on the ends In my opinion, you are en- However, no mules over 17 HalL this • • • were impressed by origlhal- ask you how to stop a titled to demand a transfer to "Just blend a bit of Bing Crosby with an equal amount of are sent overseas. the FISpeople of the fingers. you ity of the claim and believe Mr. child from biting its nails, as decent surroundings, and if Gable, a dash of Sinatra, serve piping hot—- An army mule gets four people are allergic to The school teacher to whom I it, you Clark add Roden in the If you had the answers to such don’t get should go back and you’ll get an idea of the dish I met last night!" pounds of oats for breakfast, 14 SOMEdogs. Know a charming has promises in your vest pocket, have referred got the consent of home in self defense. pounds of hay for lunch and young matron whose husband Horses St Women’s research field most of parents to try this a very’ mature mind and if Juestionst seems a very little thing to the Only four pounds of oats for supper. and two children are wild about he knows anything about balk the medical profession, but and he put a saturated aqueous spirit, ripened by broad experi- If he doesn't get his meals doga. But if a dog is near her for horses. they are Just about as helpless solution of quassia on the ends ence to a high level of compas- One Word Led to Another exactly on time he willkick the any length of time the mother as anyone else in the presence of the fingers. sionate detachment towards this By Arthur “Bugs” Baer stable to pieces. gets sick. Her neck and face of this habit. The children were given this type of vicious by*play t —which Unlike a horse, a mule will begin to swell. Brain Game Answers amounts to conversational pros- In fact the only scientific in- treatment until they had Elections were more exciting when I was a boy. Or not work until he drops. On Dec. 18. 1916, Barney Ba- I—First, paper; second, cotton; known to stopped biting the nails for one titution of human personality.— When he Is tired he rests and ruch made a half a million dol- quiry into the subject exclusively and in- I was more excitable. third, leather; fifth, wooden; me waa made by a school week. could abide nothing can budge him. lars in one day. And there was tenth, definitely among these people Moeller on Camac street chasing to tin or aluminum. teacher. Making a count he After this period had gone by I do remember Mr. Under fire horses got Into a no income tax pay at that 2—John Jay. found that the number who did without becoming, in time, a Mr. Trumbore down the street with a butcher knife be- panic but mules remain calm. time. most of the pupils had been convert to 3—California. In 1904 Cali- this was about 40 per cent of give the smirking their lecher- vote for Bryan. If a mule gets tangled In There is a club ter short peo- today conditioned to up ous bias. cause Mr. Trumbore intended to cast his fornia had 10; she has the class. The girls were habit Mr. Moeller, who worked in city hall, desisted only 25 votes. slightly more numerous than the third day's M. H. 4—Each elector voted for the But if after when we showed him the political folly of cutting Mr. E* . By the boys. application was made no im- EDITOR’S NOTE— Mary Ha two candidates for Presi- • Trumbore up into more Bryan votes. Days Being as naive as the next provement was noted, it was worth through har col These &® dent. The one who received prion po- he first asked them found best not to persist as con- omn; mot by mail or pertonal That was 1896 and I earned two-bits carrying a red the largest number became Etely to refrain from doing so. only interview. Write her in tare of banner down Broad street The redhot lava from President, the one who re- tinuation made the habit light election was tre- cient strength to win an elec- Needless to say this made no more stable. Tho Detroit Timet. dripped my this day I'T'HE 1940 ceived the second largest improvement at all. the torch down the back of neck. To mendously important to the tion. number was declared vice He had conversations with 1 don’t know whether I was for Bryan or McKinley. American people because it es- The Republican party will president. them. My old man was then selling his vote to Mr. Shell, tablished unlimited tenure in have to seek new strength 5—22 million. where None of them knew why they Washington the ward heeler in exchange for a mileage ticket on the the presidency. It has never had it, in the 6—’The Razor’s Ed ga. Scene South. did it. Pennsy. It was considered a perfectly honest transaction Heretofore, the third term Maugham: "The Apostle, Most of the admitted it waa rejected. That means a new party and Asch; "1 Never Left Home,” By George for he a traveling salesman. Later that made had been new political • bad habit, and they all wished Dixon was on was a orientation. Hope; “A Tree Grows In The tradition once broken And should that happen, they could stop. But they TOBIN and TELL you. President Tobin illegal by law. But my honest old man always figured the Brooklyn." Betty Smith. cannot be re-established. should Roosevelt be elected, he Island, didn’t member* of the Teamster*' and fellow teamsters, we can jury waa packed. 7—Rhode New Jersey AS got PRESIDENT I The 1940 election then will be without a Congress, for in yean went on he a Union, fellow citizens of this make no mistake if we get sol- When I look back those years could figure and Massachusetts that every year, on I never marked a shift in our politics any combination of Northerners order. new class but in great republic: idly behind William Jennings snite of the fact that the pupils why they went to all the trouble of secret balloting when because it became possible after and Southerners opposed to the B—Any six. We have approximately 9 Bryan. We all know where he to have a president for life sufficiently Deal would be - changed, the habit was found you could hear Mr. Moeller roaring for miles, "I'm a that New ¦¦¦¦ / hour* and 20 minutes left in stands. I do not wish to be more, to build a political large oppose a to be present Just the same in unduly alarming, I predict Republican because my father a Republican and —even to him with vin- which to nave the country! but was I'm party not around a principle but dictive constancy. the same proportions of new moment is at hand. We that if he is defeated the sacred as good as any man who arms." Connolly Answers pupils. The ever washed under the around a man. He cannot govern with an op- cannot —we dare not shilly- cause of bimetallism willbe lost Then he would come flying backward out of the position Congress; he might be I—fb). 2—(a). 3—(a). 4—(c). In short It is a habit. And shally any longer. forever. The Democratic party then comer which had swinging doors to make entrance really ceased to exist except in forced to try to rule alone. s—(c). 6—(a) the Roman **a habit is not a trifle." Ac- decide whom we will Let me tell you something, saloon cording to Montaigne We must name, and the New Deal took No election, not even the one keeper of the gates; (b) the Plato support for the greatest office fellow teamsters and please pliable and exits elastic. historically (c) habit nature, its place. In 1860, was so mo- Roman god of war; aaid is second gift of the people. stop socking those sailors while Whereupon Mr. Trumbore would howl, "I’m a Demo- mentous. is (d) Duke of within the Franklin It no wonder that Caesar; the ninth and the Wellington You have seen fit to chose me I'm talking to you!—This is a and I And the New Deal is month; (e) saw him and raised him and crat don’t care who knows it because I don’t like it political the people are too sober for the the growing as your leader, and. believe me, critical moment in our history. D. Roosevelt; is the usual excitements. month. aaid, habit is 10 times nature. The are him anyway." manifestation of his person. I am not insensible to this great forces of reaction aris- Copyright, 1944, by King Feature*. Since the habit is ingrained honor. You have charged me ing. As I often say to ouf The 1944 election marks a In 40 per cent of children of with a sacred trust; to lead you classes in gouging and mayhem: further step in the revolution of primary school age re- Let’s Explore the out of the wilderness into the “You shall not press down Laughs our political institutions. Yoitr Minis sponsibility for stopping it rests promised land. upon the brow of labor this Best of ’44 who ita Notice on both sides that By Albert Edward Wiggam, D.S. on parents can get it In You have seen fit to choose me crown of thorns; you shall not really only one voice very crucify there is incipiency. the man we will support. You mankind upon a cross of that speaks the voice of the It probably becomes estab- have also asked Mayor Hague gold.” the candidate. lished almost in cradle. and Mayor Kelly, but I am not I guess that's telling them, • • • Psychiatrists may tell you going to become angry Just be- ain’t it. fellow*? people are quies- that it is an imitation of the cause you ask everybody you So remember our candidate 1944. the sucking reflex, but that doesn't happen to meet. when you go into the voting INcent, doubtful, silent, unde- help much Therefore —in response to booth, alone with your con- monstrative. The fact remains it is a habit nation-wide clamor—- science a vote for William Have they lost Interest in the and must be broken up early if P-acticallyam naming the man: Jennings Bryan is a vote for democratic process? it la to be broken up at all. I am supporting the candidacy William Jennings Bryan! Not at all. for more Ameri- • • • of that g-r-e-a-t American, that • • a cans will vote in 1944 than in OLD well established man or the people—William SPHERE is. one thing I can any election in American his- ANremedy waa to put quinine, Jennings Bryan! A promise if our man is tory. elected: We will have no more What does their almost sullen of this Darwinian nonsense attitude mean? Judge Gene about man being descended The fact is that this is an ex- Puffle By Ahern You l traordinary serious business from the ape. know per- fectly well, teamsters, that we this 1944 election. are not descended from apes. If the people make a mistake, 9 PUT A STRANGLE ON YER NBOSs-jS§* I don’t care what Senator it will be everlastingly costly. GROGOT FROM A ‘•**TVrtSICYER ARM***AN'GIVE ' Bridges says—we re not! This campaign takes on r/tffpomvcp /-urrpce # n YUM PA BIG DRUM BOO*/- I am in a position to make a world-wide dimensions, for the solemn pledge upon behalf of defeat of Roosevelt will arrest our man. If he is upheld he will the process of socialization the positively go to Dayton, Tenn., world over and it will challenge In 1925 ana help prosecute that in our own country the social fellow J. T. Scopes, who is revolution of which he is the 1—Yes, decidedly. Many peo- neighbors. symbol. about their Moreover, teaching the school children—- ple study to much to improve it punctures our ego terribly the little helpless kiddies—that It will end the domination of by cosmopoli- their minds they neglect to min- when the other fellow tells us we are blood relations of Pithe*- American life the gle with others socially, and something that we thought Conthropus erectus. tan • eccentricities of the mid- he York, thtis their personalities grow didn’t know. It Is easier for Furthermore. I predict he will —Tha DalraN Tlaaaa town of New with its worse. But let keep some undue emphasis on Europe and don’t this people than for others to emerge triumphant, and that on “After all, you needn't have fitted back Into civilian you from trying to Improve your keep secrets but it la always a July 21. 1925, the dastardly life quite quickly!" its astounding ignorance of the Scopes ao United States. mind. strain. will be convicted and • fined 5100! • • 2 More superstitious. Sur- • GETTING ALONG WITH • • THE other hand, the de- veys have shown far more HAVE come out so positively Detroit Times Rationing Timetable ONfeat of Dewey will necessi- women than men consult for- PEOPLE tunetellers, palmists, crystal- «T MBtaa Wrtybt. Ne4ed fyahaUktM I and flat footedly because my GASOLINE tate the reorganization of the PROCESSED POODS to per- gazers, etc. Doubtless that is Thle booklet f«Uy aapUlne— detractors have been at work, A Caapan IS—4 gallons. Valid through Slav A-d thraagh W-d-Valld tndvft- opposition Roosevelt’s spreading malicious gossip. They Dm. 21 nltaly sonal rule. why more women than men con- TOUR T SASIC EMOTIONS *-* and 0-4 Caapana—4 gallons aarh. sult psychia- and how they affect yrtttny along with have had the temerity to inci- S-4 and C-S Coapana—h gallons aach. MEATS. CHEESE. PATS Such a defeat willprove that psychologists and people. It alee telle the difference be- mean insinuate—that Law raqulTM stats name aad llransa Had A I throats P-d Valid Indaftnltaly. the shifts the American pop- trists. tween Introvert! and jilwwli and nerate—l numbrri b* vrlttaa on erarr coupon On* lb. salvage fat good for 4 cants in bow to Mantlfy each I have been evading the Issue. whan racaiatd > and two mast ration polnta. ulation, increased urbanization, 3 No. Keeping a secret al- Bead io rente end a eetf MSesi ¦tamped envelope to FUEL OIL SI'OAR ways reouires effort because