OFF TO YOU, LADIES!

by Rhonda Wray 2 Copyright Notice

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3

Hats Off to You, Ladies!

A show for a mother-daughter banquet or tea Rhonda Wray 4

CAST OF CHARACTERS

Narrator(s) – One or two Model(s) – One or two

PRODUCTION NOTES This program may be used at any women’s event. Care has been taken to ensure that the language is inclusive to childless and single women as well as those who are married and mothers. Some churches call these banquets or teas “Every Daughter” events instead of “Mother-Daughter,” for we as women are all daughters, but we aren’t all mothers! This also includes mothers of sons or those whose mother is no longer living. This program is a hat fashion show. Unlike a typical fashion show, hats are so much easier to put on and take off. Changing clothes is not required. It includes a police for mediating disputes between children, a for riding the workforce range, a signifying “queen of the castle,” and more, including a vintage hat, mortarboard, jester’s hat, bridal , hard hat, stocking cap, , chef hat, and . It concludes with a “Mary” and a short meditation recognizing this extraordinary woman’s mission as mother of the Messiah. There is no memorization required, and only minimal rehearsal needed. This script is fun for a hat-themed event, but it will work for any women’s program. If you do not have access to all the hats included in this script or you are working under time constraints, they may easily be deleted without disrupting the flow of the pageant. A total of 42 hats are available to choose from and this should be plenty, even if some of the hats are not included. Setting The stage setting can vary with the facilities, as long as you keep in mind one thing: keep the show close to the audience. Alternately, you could project the model’s image onto large screens if they are available in your sanctuary or fellowship hall via digital video camera feed. Use a long rectangular table to set up the hats you are using in order of appearance. Place it beside a podium with a microphone for the narrators.

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 5

Model(s) The models should have short hair or long hair that is pulled back in a ponytail. They might want to wear something plain or subdued (such as all-black ) in order to draw attention to the various hats they’ll wear. The models will take turns modeling the hats. That way each model may be prepared with her next hat to keep the show moving along. One model could wear all the hats if a second model is not available. Narrator(s) The narrators should be excellent readers. Each phrase should be distinct and audible. Use your sound system to full advantage. If a second narrator is not available, one may handle all the narration. Props Trunk with miscellaneous hats inside, walking stick, magnifying glass, handheld weights, cleaning rag, teddy bear, sunglasses, swim goggles, stethoscope, steering wheel, coiled rope (lasso-style), paintbrush and palette, bat, bouquet of artificial flowers, spatula, magic wand, wrapped Christmas gift, hoe, rubber chicken, The Cat in the Hat book, noisemaker. Music Consider playing “Hats” by Amy Grant from her Heart in Motion album prior to the start of the show. It’s a fast-paced look at all the many hats women wear. Hats First and foremost, try asking around within your congregation for the following hats. People are usually more than happy to loan items. If you can’t find everything that way, we’ve included some suggestions for obtaining or making them. For any hat that’s particularly difficult to make or buy, simply omit it. The beauty of this program is that it may be customized to fit your available supplies. 1. Crown – This may be part of the magi’s from your Christmas costume supplies, or it may be made of gold paper. 2. – Souvenir shops may carry these . 3. – Old-style men’s hat. Check thrift stores.

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 6

4. – Check with a child or teen who is on a swim team. 5. Magician’s hat – Black hat as used in magic shows, often included in children’s magic kits. 6. Towel – Bath towel put on and crossed in the front to form a turban. 7. hat – A “farmer”-type hat. 8. Paper hat – You’ll just need a newspaper for this. You may fold the creases in beforehand so it’s easier to create quickly. 9. – Any child’s cone-shaped birthday hat is fine. 10. – This is a white fabric hat, á la Gilligan’s Island. 11. Dunce cap – You may make this out of paper. It looks like the cone-shaped party hat, only larger, with “DUNCE” written vertically down the front. 12. Fast-food cap – If you are unable to find a real one, staple two strips of heavy paper together. 13. Scarf – Use a lightweight, filmy scarf folded into a triangle that is knotted under the chin. 14. Mortarboard – Check with any recent graduate for one, and make sure the tassel is attached. 15. Jester hat – The colorful hat with bells on the pointed ends. 16. – Any sports team is fine. 17. Dr. Seuss hat – Some elementary schools hand these out, or you may make a tall, striped hat out of heavy paper, using the book as a guide. 18. Stocking cap – A small, close-fitting . It should be easy to find. 19. or – Either a “floppy” hat to keep the sun out or a brim with no cap. 20. – A terrycloth exercise headband will work for this. 21. Bandana – Tie the bandana -style, with the knot at the back of the neck. 22. Football helmet – Any kind will work, from a costume helmet to the real deal.

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 7

23. Beret – The flat hat that artists sometimes wear. 24. Firefighter’s hat – A little boy’s costume is a good source for this. 25. Nurse cap – Even though nurses don’t wear these any longer, the old-fashioned white cap still says “nurse." You may be able to make one out of heavy white paper if you can’t find one. 26. Chauffeur’s cap – You may simply make a “Chauffeur” sign and tape it to the policeman’s hat, which is used a bit later. 27. Tiara – Check at a dollar store or ask any little girl if you may borrow hers. 28. Cell phone – This should be one of your easiest items to find. 29. Policeman’s cap – Check thrift stores. 30. Vintage hat – Maybe there’s an heirloom lurking around your house. Otherwise, check thrift stores. 31. Cowboy hat – Anything from a Stetson to a little boy’s costume hat will work. 32. Santa hat – Ask around. A lot of people have hats even if they don’t have the full Santa . 33. – This may have to be made if you can’t find it in a thrift shop. 34. Bridal veil – Check with newlyweds, or make your own from netting. 35. Chef hat – If you are unable to find a real , you may cut a band from heavy white paper and attach a small white trash can liner. 36. Hard hat – If you can’t find a real one from a construction worker, you should be able to use a little boy’s toy or costume hat (Bob the Builder or something similar). 37. – Hotels are a good source for an elasticized plastic cap. 38. Night cap – If you have access to a Scrooge costume, this may come with it. Otherwise, you may have to sew this cone-shaped fabric hat.

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 8

39. – Check with anyone you know who may have just returned from Mexico. eBay or thrift stores may work also. 40. Mary drape – A rectangular length of blue or earth- tone fabric may be draped over the head. 41. Halo – A circle of tinsel will work well, as will any leftover Christmas play angel costume halos. 42. Helmet – Any type is fine. If you have a Roman soldier costume among your church’s supplies, that will work. You could also spray-paint an old football helmet, removing the face mask first.

Scripture taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION ®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 9 1 (Optional opening song “Hats” plays over the sound system. A 2 table holds all the hats that will be used in the program. The 3 MODELS stand behind the table. NARRATOR 1 stands 4 behind the podium.) 5 NARRATOR 2: (Enters lugging heavy box or trunk filled with hats 6 while optional song concludes.) Whew! This is heavy. Why? 7 (Opens trunk to reveal a variety of hats.) Because women 8 wear a lot of hats these days! Maybe you’ll recognize 9 yourself in some of them. Mother, wife, employee, sister, 10 grandmother, and so many more! Whether married or 11 single, out in the workforce or a stay-at-home mom or 12 retired, kids or no kids, we all play a lot of roles. Let’s 13 take a look at some of the hats we wear. (NARRATOR 2 14 places trunk on the floor and opens it so MODELS may place 15 the hats they wore inside.) 16 17 CROWN 18 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on crown) Sure, you’re queen 19 of your castle — but that doesn’t mean you’ll always be 20 treated like royalty. As you moms interact with your 21 children, some of your suggestions — not to mention 22 your rules — may not be met with much enthusiasm. 23 Yes, whining or complaining may echo off the castle 24 walls. Carry on! Consistency creates character. (MODEL 25 1 takes off crown and puts it in the trunk. She locates the fedora 26 and prepares to put it on.) 27 28 COONSKIN CAP 29 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on coonskin cap and holds 30 walking stick) As we encounter each new phase of life, 31 from young girl to teenager to young adult to middle- 32 aged to elderly, the unknown might seem like the 33 untamed frontier. Just as the explorers discovered our 34 country, may we all accept, explore, and delight in each 35 unique season of our lives. Let’s remember to thank the 36 Lord for the days he has given us and the “good works 37 which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 38 2:10). (MODEL 2 takes off coonskin cap and puts it in the

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 10 1 trunk. She keeps the goggles ready.) 2 3 FEDORA 4 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on fedora and holds magnifying 5 glass up to eye) When life gives you mysteries, sometimes 6 you gotta play Sherlock Holmes. Who left the milk out? 7 Why didn’t you do your homework? And why don’t the 8 plastic produce bags at the supermarket open on the 9 first try? (MODEL 1 takes off fedora and puts it in the trunk. 10 She locates the magician’s hat and prepares to put it on.) 11 12 SWIM CAP 13 NARRATOR 2: (Holds up swim cap, speaks to MODEL 2, who puts 14 on the goggles.) Don’t put this on, because these things 15 are really tight — (To audience) but this swim cap 16 reminds me that we as women are constantly 17 in responsibilities. Sometimes we feel like we’re 18 drowning! Help from others and the Lord is the lifeline 19 we can grab hold of when we feel we’re going under. 20 Philippians 4:6 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, 21 but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with 22 thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” (MODEL 2 23 takes off goggles and puts them in the trunk, as does 24 NARRATOR 2 with the swim cap. MODEL 2 locates the towel 25 and keeps it ready.) 26 27 MAGICIAN’S HAT 28 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on magician’s hat and holds 29 magic wand) Abracadabra! I’m sure you’ve got a lot of 30 tricks up your sleeve! (MODEL 1 takes off hat and holds it 31 upside down, waving magic wand over it.) Maybe you 32 haven’t made a rabbit come out of a hat, but you’ve 33 probably made boo-boos disappear with a mere kiss, or 34 disguised vegetables in your spaghetti sauce, or 35 changed the look of a room with a fresh coat of paint. 36 Presto change-o! (MODEL 1 takes off magician’s hat and 37 puts it in the trunk. She locates the and prepares to 38 put it on.)

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 11 1 TOWEL TURBAN 2 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 holds up towel) One of the 3 essential rites of passage for a woman is learning how 4 to turn a towel into a turban. How many times in your 5 life have you done this after a shampoo? (MODEL 2 flips 6 head upside down and a towel turban, poses, then 7 takes off towel turban and puts it in the trunk. She locates the 8 newspaper and keeps it ready.) 9 10 STRAW HAT 11 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on straw hat and holds a hoe) 12 Straw hats remind me of farmers. Like a farmer makes 13 things grow, so do we. Some of us are “green thumbs” 14 that can coax any type of plant life to grow. Some of us 15 are moms who tend to our children and watch them 16 grow, from the baby you cuddled, wrapped in a 17 receiving blanket, to the high school graduate who just 18 received his diploma. (MODEL 1 takes off straw hat and 19 puts it in the trunk. She locates the party hat and prepares to 20 put it on.) 21 22 PAPER HAT 23 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 makes paper hat out of newspaper) 24 Making a paper hat is a skill we learn in our younger 25 years. It comes in handy if you’re a mom trying to 26 entertain your child. (MODEL puts on paper hat.) Voilá! 27 (MODEL 2 takes off paper hat and puts it in the trunk. She 28 locates the bucket hat and prepares to put it on.) 29 30 PARTY HAT 31 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on party hat and blows 32 noisemaker once) Are you a party planner extraordinaire? 33 From a one-year-old’s first celebration eating fistfuls of 34 cake in a high chair to a sophisticated sweet sixteen, 35 parties come in all styles. Whether hosting or 36 “guesting,” these little numbers signify another 37 birthday as well as fun, fellowship, and hospitality. 38 (MODEL 1 takes off party hat and puts it in the trunk. She

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 12 1 locates the dunce cap and prepares to put it on.) 2 3 BUCKET HAT 4 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on bucket hat) This is what 5 Gilligan wore when he was stranded on the island. 6 Haven’t we all like a castaway at times? But 7 Scripture reminds us, “Cast all your anxiety upon him 8 because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7). (MODEL 2 takes off 9 bucket hat and puts it in the trunk. She locates the fast-food cap 10 and prepares to put it on.) 11 12 DUNCE CAP 13 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on dunce cap) It’s a good thing 14 a number of us chose the teaching profession, or we’d 15 all need to wear one of these! The Scriptures speak of 16 the “renewing of our minds,” and the love of learning 17 teachers instill can help us do just that. (MODEL 1 takes 18 off dunce cap and puts it in the trunk. She locates the scarf and 19 prepares to put it on.) 20 21 FAST-FOOD CAP 22 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on fast-food cap) Dinner 23 together at the table is a great goal, but it can seem like 24 an elusive dream when kids are headed in a dozen 25 different directions. Whether it’s a home-cooked meal 26 or take-out or even the drive-through, the important 27 thing is connecting as a family and strengthening those 28 bonds. (MODEL 2 takes off fast-food cap and puts it in the 29 trunk. She locates the mortarboard and prepares to put it on.) 30 31 SCARF 32 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on scarf and knots it under her 33 chin) Does a scarf remind you of your mom or grandma? 34 Although we don’t see them worn this way very often 35 anymore, women frequently put them on so the wind 36 wouldn’t damage their carefully coiffed hair. (MODEL 1 37 takes off scarf and puts it in the trunk. She locates the jester hat 38 and prepares to put it on.)

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 13 1 MORTARBOARD 2 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on mortarboard) What a 3 blessing education is! Most of us are veterans of many 4 years of school. Some of us have gotten advanced 5 degrees. Others have been the chief homework helper 6 for their children or a homeschooling mom. We should 7 all be thankful for our education, for it enriches who we 8 are. (MODEL 2 takes off mortarboard and puts it in the trunk. 9 She locates the baseball cap and prepares to put it on.) 10 11 JESTER HAT 12 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on jester hat and holds up 13 rubber chicken) A little comic relief from the daily 14 stressors never hurt any woman. Humor is a welcome 15 diversion when life gets stressful. Some days, if we 16 didn’t laugh, we’d go crazy! Find your inner jester. 17 Humor makes life tolerable — and ever so much more 18 fun. (MODEL 1 takes off jester hat and puts it in the trunk. She 19 locates the Dr. Seuss hat and prepares to put it on.) 20 21 BASEBALL CAP 22 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on baseball cap and holds bat) 23 Your mom career often includes sitting through a 24 sporting event or two or ten — win or lose, in all kinds 25 of weather. (MODEL 2 takes off baseball cap and puts it in the 26 trunk. She locates the stocking cap and prepares to put it on.) 27 28 DR. SEUSS HAT 29 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on Dr. Seuss hat) Your mom 30 career also includes reading bedtime stories and 31 anytime stories — and the younger the kiddo, the more 32 likely they are to want their favorite read over and over 33 and over: Goodnight Moon, Pat the Bunny, and who can 34 forget that Dr. Seuss classic, (MODEL 1 holds up book) 35 The Cat in the Hat. (MODEL 1 takes off Dr. Seuss hat and 36 puts it in the trunk. She locates the sun hat or visor and 37 prepares to put it on.) 38

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 14 1 STOCKING CAP 2 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on stocking cap) Brrrr — it’s 3 chilly in our houses sometimes. Feelings get hurt, 4 someone’s not talking to someone else, and the feeling 5 is cold. Then it’s our turn to bring warmth and love to 6 our homes and establish an atmosphere of trust and 7 caring. (MODEL 2 takes off stocking cap and puts it in the 8 trunk. She locates the headband and prepares to put it on.) 9 10 SUN HAT or VISOR 11 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on sun hat or visor and 12 sunglasses) This little number is great for keeping those 13 UV rays away. The beach is a wonderful destination for 14 a summer trip. If you can put up with “Are we there 15 yet?” every fifteen minutes, then hop in the car, play the 16 alphabet game, and enjoy some downtime with those 17 you love. Making memories is what family vacations are 18 all about. (MODEL 1 takes off sun hat or visor and puts it in 19 the trunk. She locates the bandana and prepares to put it on.) 20 21 HEADBAND 22 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on headband and lifts handheld 23 weights) Exercise. Weight-bearing exercise is good for 24 your bones. Cardio is heart-healthy and releases those 25 “feel good” endorphins. Yoga strengthens your core. 26 Now if you can only find the time … (MODEL 2 takes off 27 headband and puts it in the trunk. She locates the football 28 helmet and prepares to put it on.) 29 30 BANDANA 31 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 ties on bandana kerchief-style and 32 holds a cleaning rag for dusting as the NARRATOR speaks) 33 Are you the chief cleaning lady? Do you ever wonder 34 why it can’t just stay done? Little fingerprints, 35 multiplying dust bunnies — and don’t get me started on 36 the laundry! (MODEL 1 takes off bandana and puts it in the 37 trunk. She locates the beret and prepares to put it on.) 38

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 15 1 FOOTBALL HELMET 2 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on football helmet) You’ll need 3 this for all the charging around you do. The errands 4 just don’t stop, do they? The grocery store, the mall, and 5 the dry clearner’s all vie for your attention. You just 6 have to decide on your play, dodge the traffic, and 7 execute it as quickly as you can. (MODEL 2 takes off 8 football helmet and puts it in the trunk. She locates the 9 firefighter’s helmet and prepares to put it on.) 10 11 BERET 12 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on beret and holds paint brush 13 and palette) Bet you didn’t know you’re an artist. You 14 create something from nothing on a daily basis. Pirate 15 costume for the school play? Check. Cookies for the 16 bake sale? Yep. PowerPoint presentation for the ten 17 o’clock meeting? Got it. Who needs a canvas? (MODEL 1 18 removes beret and puts it in the trunk. She locates the nurse cap 19 and prepares to put it on.) 20 21 FIREFIGHTER’S HELMET 22 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on firefighter’s helmet) 23 Sometimes it might seem like all you do all day is put 24 out fires, whether on the job or in the home. (MODEL 2 25 removes firefighter’s helmet and puts it in the trunk. She 26 locates the chauffeur’s cap and prepares to put it on.) 27 28 NURSE CAP 29 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on nurse cap and stethoscope) A 30 number of us have worked in healthcare. Kudos to all 31 the healthcare professionals out there! Your expertise 32 and caring attitude creates an atmosphere of healing 33 and hope for your patients. (MODEL 1 removes nurse cap 34 and puts it in the trunk. She locates the tiara and prepares to 35 put it on.) 36 37 38

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 16 1 CHAUFFEUR’S CAP 2 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on chauffeur’s cap and holds 3 steering wheel) Are there any chauffeurs in our audience 4 today? Is your car your home away from home? Do you 5 ever wonder why you even bother to take your keys out 6 of the ignition? Colton has his soccer game. Kaitlyn has 7 ballet. Oh, no! They’re at the same time! (MODEL 2 8 removes chauffeur’s cap and puts it in the trunk. She locates 9 the cell phone and keeps it ready.) 10 11 TIARA 12 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on tiara) Have some of you 13 played the part of the tooth fairy more times than you 14 can remember? (MODEL 1 takes off tiara and puts it in the 15 trunk. She locates the policeman’s cap and prepares to put it 16 on.) 17 18 CELL PHONE 19 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 holds up cell phone to ear) So, OK, 20 a cell phone isn’t exactly a hat, but many of us seem to 21 practically wear it on our heads! Communication is 22 easier now than ever, so use technology to your 23 advantage. E-mail a shut-in. Text your kids an “I love 24 you.” Call your parents just to say hi, for the Bible tells 25 us to “Honor your father and mother” (Exodus 20:12). 26 (MODEL 2 puts cell phone in the trunk. She locates the vintage 27 hat and prepares to put it on.) 28 29 POLICEMAN’S CAP 30 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on policeman’s cap) Just call 31 moms “kiddie cops.” We mediate disputes and enforce 32 the law. “She started it,” “he finished it.” You name it, 33 we’ve punished it! (MODEL 1 takes off policeman’s cap and 34 puts it in the trunk. She locates the cowboy hat and prepares to 35 put it on.) 36 37 38

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. 17 1 VINTAGE HAT 2 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on vintage hat) This old hat 3 has been around awhile. It was someone’s great- 4 grandmother’s, and it represents the history of the 5 women in your family. We can all learn from the godly 6 examples of our ancestors — your mother, your 7 grandmother, her grandmother. Hand down the family 8 stories to your children. They are the most precious 9 heirloom you could give them. They will feel a 10 connection to their heritage. And we can benefit from 11 the household hints, parenting tips, and wisdom from 12 those who have logged a few more years than we have. 13 (MODEL 2 takes off vintage hat and puts it in the trunk. She 14 locates the Santa hat and prepares to put it on.) 15 16 COWBOY HAT 17 NARRATOR 1: (As MODEL 1 puts on cowboy hat and holds lasso) 18 Yee-haw! There’s nothing like riding the workforce 19 range. The days on the trail can be long, with 20 unexpected detours. If you fall down, just hop back in 21 the saddle and keep on going. If you can lasso a 22 promotion, that’s great! (MODEL 1 takes off cowboy hat and 23 puts it in the trunk. She locates the bonnet and prepares to put 24 it on.) 25 26 SANTA HAT 27 NARRATOR 2: (As MODEL 2 puts on Santa hat and holds 28 wrapped Christmas gift) Holidays are special occasions. 29 As women, we create a warm and inviting atmosphere 30 for those we love. The decorating, the shopping, the 31 card-sending, and the gift-wrapping — what’s not to 32 love? But don’t overdo it, or you’ll lose the joy of the 33 season! This Santa hat also reminds me of all the giving 34 women typically do. We give of our time, our energy, 35 our money, and our gifts — and attitude is everything, 36 for “God loves a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7). 37 (MODEL 2 takes off Santa hat and puts it in the trunk. She 38 locates the bridal veil and prepares to put it on.)

This perusal script is for reading purposes only. No performance or photocopy rights are conveyed. Thank you for reading this free excerpt from: HATS OFF TO YOU, LADIES! by Rhonda Wray.

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