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£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 …AS…AS AA £3£3 NOTENOTE £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 Issue Number One in the BENT COPPERS Series £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 A slash zine of The Professionals WARNING: THIS ANTHOLOGY CONTAINS SAME SEX, ADULT ORIENTED MATERIAL. IT WILL NOT BE SOLD TO ANYONE UNDER THE AGE OF EIGHTEEN. Published by: Oblique Publications PO Box 43784 Tucson, AZ USA 85733-3784 [email protected] http://www.oblique-publications.net Send SASE or email for information. Age statement required. …As a £3 Note is an amateur publication, copyright © Feb. 1991 by Oblique Publications. All rights reserved. This copyright is not intended to infringe upon or conflict with other holders of copyrights. No reprints of any type are permitted without express, written permission of the publisher and individual contributors involved. CONTENTS £3£3£3 £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 AS QUEER BENT A SHILLING COPPERS SHOCKER A Summer’s Outing 5 In Flagrante Delicto 71 M. Fae Glasgow M. Fae Glasgow THRUPP’NY TWO COPPERS BIT TO RUB Panoramic View 25 Edi N. Burgh TOGETHER Own Goal 90 Murphy’s Law 32 M. Fae Glasgow L. A. Scotian Footbridge 98 BRASS Cally Donia £3£3£3 2 FARTHING GUINEA £3£3£3 Nanny’s Teddy Tales and Other Bedtime Stories: Exeunt 42 TO A Emma Scot GOOSEBERRY Nanny’s Teddy Tales and Other Devices and Desires 109 Bedtime Stories: An Abarent M. Fae Glasgow Abearation 47 Gael X. Ile GOLD SILVER FOR THE THRUPPENCE FERRYMAN I Saw Three Ships 57 Silence = Death 136 Gael X. Ile M. Fae Glasgow £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 …As a £3 Note £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 £3£3£3 TO OUR READERS £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 …AS A £3 NOTE To Our Readers: On the Question of the Zine and its Title is as gay as they come and well-adjusted, in- Yes, the portion of the saying that comes be- deed, while in the next tale it takes him years to fore the ellipsis periods in ‘…as a £3 note’ is ‘As recognize and come to grips with his sexuality. queer as…’ and that’s precisely what we at Ob- But to return to storylines. Each tale in £3 lique Publications hope will spring to mind when makes a comment about a common Pros fiction you see it. £3 is our first effort at producing a convention or theme. In some, M. Fae Glasgow full length Professionals slash zine (There are a adds her own contribution to the existing library number of the Glaswegian’s Pros stories in our of stories; “I Saw Three Ships” is a Christmas Pæan to Priapus series.), and we don’t expect it story, sweet and touching and romantic, noth- to be our last. Only two sets of hands have ing out-of-kilter, while “Silence = Death” is a worked on £3: those of the editor—me—and death scene. those of one writer, M. Fae Glasgow, a tireless Ah, but that’s just the beginning. The wee and prolific Scottish nanny. We both hope you Scot has also chosen to write about Murphy, won’t be disappointed with the quality of the teddy bears, sports, undercover operations, contents. Glasgow, outdoor sex, Cowley, and a rather femi- On the Question of Queers nized Doyle. And these tales are not necessarily In a sense, £3 is not for beginners. I think it what you may expect—unless you already un- can be read and enjoyed by a Pros novice, but it derstand M Fae’s devious mind. She is psycho- does presuppose a working knowledge of the logical in approach and dark in execution. Be Pros universe. If you have read widely among prepared for twists and turns, for white when £3£3£3 Pros fiction, then most likely you will be famil- there should be black, and deepest black when 3 iar with the conventions and themes that ap- there should be color. If a straight road leads £3£3£3 pear over and over. First and foremost is an ac- from A to B she will find a back alley that takes ceptance that Bodie and Doyle are/have been/ twice as long to traverse. She is a storyteller will become lovers. Call it the basic premise. with a lot to say! Then, building on this, a number of classic Her writing is solid and dense, utilizing every themes and storylines emerge. Some are obvi- last bit of allotted space on the page, any left- ous and universal, used in other slash fandoms. over whiteness methodically searched out and Others are quirky, odd, and restricted to the filled with more words. You’ll find she writes long Pros universe. £3 touches both categories. narrative passages punctuated by bursts of On the Question of Contents sharp, spot on dialogue. Well—at times the dia- It is my belief that the vast majority of Pros logue isn’t so short, but it always retains a sweet, slash stories are romantic pieces. Certainly our piercing clarity. And the sex scenes, oh the sex heroes have their ups and downs, their colli- scenes! They are vivid, richly detailed descrip- sions and miscues. Still, in the end, boy gets tions, hot and arousing and not for you if you boy and love conquers all. What more could we prefer to stop at the bedroom door. She says want? Well, rather a lot if you talk to the she likes to write these scenes in a ‘oner’: start- Glaswegian… ing at the beginning, fingers flying over the key- She insists that one of the most delightful board, hands never pausing or lifting until both aspects of writing slash—apart from the sex partners are sated and basking in the inevitable scenes!—is that as fantasy about fictional char- afterglow. acters, you can vary the parameters and specif- On the Question of Sources of Inspiration ics with each story. (Come to think of it, you You probably already know that a vast body can do that with any kind of fiction writing.) of Pros stories have been written over the last There is no need to always render Bodie and dozen or so years. (And if you don’t know, write Doyle in exactly one fashion. In one piece Bodie to me at Oblique Publications. I can send ad- £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 …As a £3 Note £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 TO OUR READERS £3£3£3 £3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3£3 dresses.) What a resource! The Glaswegian and On the Question of Spelling and Punctuation I cannot begin to list all the wonderful writers I’m an American and my writing appears with we have enjoyed, but if there is one to be singled American spelling. The Glaswegian attempts to out as a source of inspiration for tone and theme spell and punctuate in the British fashion, and and content, that person is Sebastian. She, too, any peculiarities are a sign of Scottish rebel- has a mind that twists towards a dark perspec- lion. You have been warned. tive on sexuality and the human condition. On the Question of Sequels On the Question of Words The Glaswegian says she won’t write any. If This is really a comment on wordsmithing: you want a sequel to a story or perhaps a differ- the act of creating new words, inventing new ent ending, you go right ahead and write it. M. vocabulary. You think that it’s not proper, that Fae will be flattered, even if you rewrite the story it’s somehow illegal? Sorry, but Shakespeare because you can’t stand what she did to the invented thousands of new words and phrases, characters; she certainly doesn’t mind engen- many of them still in common use today.