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Home , Incest

,111 .I, Number 5 May 1979

ISSN:009’-‘JQQG. yIII Sex Information and Education Council of the U.S.

DEALING WITH THE LAST

lames W. Ramey, EdD Visiting Professor, Department of Psychiatry Bowman Gray School of Medicine Winston-Salem, North Carolina

Back in 1970, sex research historian Edward Brecher pre- about the “”--and its dicted that, after the homosexual taboo began to break heinous effects on children. Prominent among these reputed down, incest as the last social taboo would soon follow suit. effects were insanity and/or a life of crime. So-called scientific At a meeting of the for the Scientific Study of Sex a proof for these assertions was forthcoming from few months later, Mary Calderone, Wardell Pomeroy, Albert simpleminded nose-counting in prisons and insane asylums. Ellis, and I discussed Ed’s prediction. We agreed about the The researcher asked for a show of hands--“How many of following points with respect to incest: you inmates have ever masturbated?” Of course the re- sponse was well above 90%, thus proving the effect of 1. The taboo has prevented scientific investigation of incest. masturbation beyond question! How lucky for us all that the 2. Lacking scientific investigation, we are reduced to relying researchers did not ask the inmates how many of them had on the results of a few clinical or criminal cases for our ever had intercourse. Not until the Kinsey studies showed knowledge of the subject. that 92% of the population masturbates at one time or 3. Clinical and criminal cases are seldom if ever representa- another were we reluctantly forced to abandon the notion tive of a universe of human behavior. that masturbation automatically leads to various and sundry 4. The reported criminal and clinical cases tend to support dire consequences. moral and religious pronouncements with respect to in- Is there a parallel regarding incest? Everybody “knows” cest. incest has been taboo in every society since time began. This 5. No researcher has yet had ,the guts to find out what is assertion is repeated over and over again by people who really happening. write books and articles without doing their homework first. As an example of this final point, the Institute for Sex Incest is not and has not been taboo in every society. It is in Research, while undertaking the famous Kinsey studies of fact one of the most recent crimes to enter the English , inadvertently gathered what was to remain criminal law calendar, an event which took place in 1908. To for many years the largest data base with respect to incest this day incest between bastard relations is not criminal in ever brought together in one study-a data base that in- Scotland, nor is intercourse between and niece inces- cluded a broad range of society and that was not restricted to tuous in England, or for that matter, in Rhode Island. people in therapy or in prison. So far this material remains Some authors may have been confused because they did unpublished by the Institute, on the basis that “the popula- not carefully check what was considered incest in a particular tion is not ready for it.” Translation: the data suggest that society. In the Trobriand Islands, for example, a who some practitioners of incest have not been horribly damaged has intercourse with her ’s is committing in- by their experience. cest, whereas if she has intercourse with her she is not Eight years have passed since that conversation at the committing incest. In the southern island of , incest has SSSS meeting and Brecher’s prediction may be coming to been accepted for centuries, and occurs today. Thus there is pass, for today we have an unprecedented wave of new some question about the extent to which incest is taboo. books on incest, articles on incest, and even television There is even more question about what actually constitutes programs and movies on incest, with more to come. Unfor- incest. tunately, the books published to date add little to what we Some legal definitions restrict incest to intercourse. already know about the subject. We are in roughly the same Others include varying degrees of sexual involvement and position today regarding incest as we were a hundred years some include such vague definitions as carnal knowledge, ago with respect to our fear of masturbation. which could be interpreted to include changing clothes or In the post-Civil War era there was a mighty hue and cry even some harmless activity while fully clothed. Further- more, the law in some states forbids not only between ing their was upheld on the grounds that they did relatives, but between those who are not blood-related at all, not know they were related when they married. The Swedish such as in-laws or step-kin. To say the least, the situation is Parliament is expected to abolish the incest laws in , confusing. Like many other laws in the area of personal on the recommendation of the minister of justice and the morality, those dealing with incest seem overly vague and committee he appointed to look into the matter. It is as- overly harsh. sumed that existing laws against abuse will take care of Over the years it has been shown again and again those few instances in which violence, extreme coercion, or that the harmful effects on the brought about by occur, and that in other instances psychological deter- official recognition and punishment of incest were more rents to incest are stronger than legal ones anyway. serious than the effects of the incest itself (Gerchow, 1965; The Law Reform Commission of Canada in a 1978 report Hiller, 1926; Mittermaier, 1906). Many professionals who to Parliament has made a similar recommendation-one, discover incest in the course of their work with are however, that does not go as far. It has recommended that careful not to make an issue of it. If they feel that one party to incest between consenting adults no longer be considered an the incest is being grossly taken advantage of, then they find offense. As Maisch (1972) said: some other reason to remove that person from the situation, The variable nature of the legal treatment of incest for they know that to make an issue of the incest is primarily reflects not only the uncertainty of official attitudes to punish the victim, since our court system will either toward the “crime” but also dependence upon culture remove the child from its home or incarcerate the adult. In and epoch and uncertainty about the punishable na- either case the victim not only bears the guilt of having ture of, and the aim of guarding against the “crime.” broken up the family, but may also be “stint away” to a foster The basic motivation of today’s laws will withstand home or to an institution. neither critical nor empirical testing by the medical If incest occurred only at the instigation of mentally and and behavioral sciences. They appear to be a kind of emotionally disturbed individuals, there might be sufficient ingrained prejudice. justification for legal action despite the likelihood of breaking up the family and punishing the victim. But the evidence What about the biological argument against incest? Even suggests that incest, while deviant insofar as it goes against if the person who instigates incest is not mentally or emo- the prevailing norms of society, is not usually tionally deranged, what of the possibility that genetically psychopathological. As early as 1936, Sonden showed that defective children might result from incest? In the early part incest seldom has anything to do with sexually “perverse” of the century this argument was dismissed, based on studies behavior. Schwab (1938) gave a figure of 3% for perversions, in Sweden, Germany, and the United States. In 1955 Weinberg according to Maisch (1972). It is noteworthy that adultery, reminded us that brother- in Egypt and another “deviant” behavior that was often punished by death among the Inca resulted in no degeneration over as many as only a hundred years ago, is still illegal (and still punished by 14 generations. Stern (1960) claimed that human geneticists death if you are a woman in Saudi Arabia) but is no longer Continued bn page 6 regarded with the same highly charged negativism as the “sick” behavior of incest. There is no question but that those individuals who use extreme coercion, violence, or rape in the commission of incest should be summarily punished. The problem arises when incest is automatically equated with rape and violence - Volume VII, Number 5 May 1979 although we know that this is generally not a proper analogy.

in a recent article Cohen (1978) discusses the gradual The S/ECUS Report is published bimonthly. Subscriptions withering away of the . He examines the various are sold on a volume basis only, with volumes beginning in explanations for the existence of the taboo and finds them all September. wanting, including the biological one. He then suggests that Subscription rates: Individual, $10 for one year; Canadian there has been a trend away from the incest taboo for several and foreign, $14. Institutional, $20; Canadian and foreign, $24. Single copies of any issue, $2. thousand years because the economic necessity on which it Queries about subscriptions and delivers should be sent to was based has become less meaningful as have Human Sciences Press, 72 Fifth Avenue, t&w York. NY 10011 become more complex. When we arrange societies on a (overseas office: 3 Henrietta Street, London, England WC2E continuum of complexity from least to most complex we find 8LU). Editorial queries should be sent to SlECUS at the an inverse relationship between degree of complexity and address below number of people who fall under the incest taboo-the SlECUS Report is available on microfilm from University Mjcrofilms, 300 North Zeeb Road, Ann Arbor, Ml 48106. greater the complexity, the fewer tabooed. Cohen’s argument is economic: the need to trade exter- Editor-Mary S. Calderone, MD Managing Editor--Frederick E. Bidgood, nally was so strong in simple societies that an entire village Publications Officer-Anne Backman, MA might come under the incest taboo; in later, more structured Copyrig ht Q 1979 by The Sex Information and Education groups it was only incest that was tabooed, and so on Council of the U.S., Inc., 84 Fifth Avenue, New York, NY until in modern, highly complex societies the need appears lOQ11. to have given way to custom. Library of Congress catalog card number 72-627361 The current activity in Sweden tends to support Cohen’s No part of the SIECUS Report may be reproduced in any form argument. There it was found that there has been intermar- without written permission from the SIECUS Publications riage without adverse effects. In one case a brother-sister Office. couple were prosecuted but ofi appeal their case for continu-

2 SIECUS Report, May 1979 SPEAKING OUT

Analysis + Reportage # Advocacy

Much is heard today about the low level of general education searchers did not condemn, they were accused of advocating in young people-low especially in the basic skills of reading the sexual behaviors they had described, A to Z, in their two and reading comprehension. With regard to the latter, there studies. is a related failure factor in the general adult population, a The scientific method puts on all of us the obligation to failure to understand the scientific methodology that, re- react objectively to evidence and data. In this process of duced to simplest terms, consists of a process: choice and reacting, we should remind ourselves that analysis plus identification of a population group to be studied, what you reportage does not equal advocacy. The editors of the want to find out about it, and how you are going to go about S/ECUS Report, aware that the topic of incest is currently this finding out. Do it. Report the results. Analyze and discuss being dealt with in many books and journal articles, asked these. Draw whatever conclusions are justified. Get it all Dr. James Ramey to discuss the subject in this issue’s lead published. Period. Beating the drums for your own conclu- article. It is evident that what Ramey is reporting is the sions is not smiled upon. Rather, their acceptance or rejec- present situation in which a number of conclusions about the tion, whether enthusiastic or cautious, is best left to your effects of incest have been drawn on the basis of insufficient peers. or nonexistent data. What he is advocating is adequate ax Magazine-type studies are rife today: a questionnaire properly conducted r~~~d,tt~-~ctsa~~t- --.-. .__~ ,__ will go out or be published, with many questions almost ~~~~~?-~n~e~~~~~research to-take- __I.~ --. e--m- .-_- ~--x.“-~- -.-_.: ----- ._---‘-me- inevitably introducing bias. Self-selection by subjects re- Granted tme results WIII show-*=-*--C_I- up .either ~^“. .(_ _as positiveor - sponding may surely introduce more bias, but results will be , can rn the absence. 1 reported. Research that stands up? Sometimes, but not always. But the general public, unfamiliar with valid research ‘s article is an excell?“ni^l methodology, swallows the results whole. interim report on a troubling subject, clearing the decks, as it Sex research carries a double hazard-the above, plus were, of the kind of preconceptions and concerns that can so the discomfort of the topic for most people, arousing anger, often obscure the really important issues. What are not prejudices, and resistance. When the first Kinsey (male) study needed in the field of sexuality are hysteria and fear. What is came out a storm arose: the public simply would not believe most needed is a calm, rational approach based on evidence the figures on , homosexual behavior, mas- arising out of sound research. Only in this way can the truth turbation. But it was as nothing to the storm that swept up about incest be established and integrated into our whole with the second (female) study. People believed these figures comprehension of sexual behavior. even less, and Kinsey and his colleagues were berated for peering into things they had no business peering into (voy- Mav S. Calderone, MD eurism), and for telling about what they found (, Frederick E. Bidgood, MA libel of innocent womanhood). Further, because the re- Anne Backman, MA

Resources to Write for . . .

iDOYOU--K-NOW THAT. . . I Fundamentals of Human Sexuality, 1st edition, 1972, by Herant A. Katchadourian and Donald T. Lunde, is available Forum for Older Women from the Robert E. Krieger Publishing Co., P.O. Box 542, Huntington, NY 11743, at a cost of $2.95 for single copies The National Action Forum for Older Women was recently (plus SO@ postage), or at $1 each for 25 copies (plus $6.00 organized to establish a network and central resource ex- postage). Although there is now a revised edition of this change for all people with interests in the issues which text, the original version remains a sound, useful resource, impact on women in mid and late life. To obtain brochures and the low bulk price may be helpful for groups operating describing in detail the philosophy and goals of the organiza- with a limited resource budget. tion, write to Nancy King, co-directer, NAFOW Social Re- search, Policy and Practice Exchange, Center on Aging, Perceptions, the newsletter of the Association for Children University of Maryland, College Park, MD 20742; or Jane with Learning , contains practical advice on how to Porcine, co-director, NAFOW Physical and Mental Health work for and with brain-injured children; information about Exchange, School of Allied Health Professions, Health Sci- relevant new programs, research, and laws; and book re- ences Center, State University of New York, Stony Brook, NY views. The yearly subscription rate for eight issues is $12.00. 11794. Write to Perceptions, Inc., P.O. Box 142, Millburn, NJ 07041.

SIECUS Report, May 1979 3 I I j LEGAL BRIEFS

“Legal Briefs” is prepared by Ralph Slovenko, LLB, PhD, Professor of Law and Psychiatry, Wayne State University Law School, Detroit, Mich.

adoptive and their children. As formulated, incest Incest laws seem to be primarily based on the hypothesis of harmful biological effects and a consequent concern for the produc- tion of defective progeny. Thus the step- or adoptive All 50 of the United States outlaw incestuous sexual relation- relationship has not been seriously considered under the ships, whether marital or nonmarital. The severity of the incest law. Many of the statutes were enacted prior to the prohibition set out in the criminal law-penalties ranging time when a 50% rate had made the step- or adoptive from 1 to 10 or 20 years in prison-is linked to the degree of parent situation common. A few states, though, do forbid the relationship. Incest as a crime is generally defined in the between father and stepdaughter, mothe-r- United States much more broadly than in other countries. and stepson, or brother-in-law and sister-in-law. (An analysis i The legal prohibition on incest in other countries has tended of the various states’ statutory responses and a summaryl to contract with the diminishing size of the family unit. On reference chart including the prohibited conduct and rela-‘.: the other hand, many states in the U.S. have enlarged the tionships are presented in Daugherty, 1978.) As a matterz$,- prohibited degrees of relationships to add to the father- actual incidence, the sex act occurs far more frequently , mother-, and brother-sister relationships between father and stepdaughter than between naturaL those of -grandchild, uncle-niece, - father and child. The problems related to incest seem to be nephew, and first . (Some new criminal codes of less morbid in the step- relationship. In any case, the step- several states now specify that there be actual knowledge of father is subject to prosecution under laws against contribut- the relationship, a minor change in the law giving protection ing to the delinquency of a minor or against child molesta- in the unusual case, as when orphaned children meet for the tion. first time as adults without knowledge of their .) In When a girl is underage, an act constituting incest may some societies cousins may marry, and often do, even overlap . The crime is rape when the act is by though the could result in physically unattractive force [People v. Lipski, 328 Mich. 194, 43 N.W.2d 327 (1950)]. or otherwise undesirable offspring by the emergence of Should incest itself be considered a crime? Some favor recessive genetic characteristics. One notable historic exam- decriminalization or that it be dealt with in family courts ple, well documented, is the Hapsburg family’s physical and (Eekelaar & Katz, 1978, chap. 34). Incest as an indictable mental abnormalities. Then again, was the off- offense did not exist at common law, it being considered that spring of a brother-sister marriage, yet was reputedly as per- church sanctions were sufficient. A common finding in cases fect a specimen of the human race as could be found in any of incest is that one or both partners is psychotic and, should age or class of society. the individual be institutionalized, it should be in a hospital, Largely because of the stigma and secrecy surrounding not a prison. There are also many cases of incest, notably incest, accurate statistics on its incidence are not available. among black families, where the mother is away from home Paul Cebhard and associates in a survey carried out in 1965 during the day, the father is unemployed and is on drugs or estimated that 3.9% of the average population in the United alcohol, and he initiates an intimacywith the daughter. When States had experienced incest and that 13.1% of a prison an occurrence of incest comes to the attention of the district population had (Gebhard et al., 1965). The incidence in the attorney, the offender is sometimes placed in a “criminally U.S. of reported incest in relation to the total number of sex insane unit” on the ground that he is “not competent to offenses is approximately 3%. According to much of the stand trial.” More often than not, however, the district literature, father-daughter incest is the most common, attorney shuts his eye to the criminal law and, although this is brother-sister the next, with mother-son least common. beyond his official jurisdiction, seeks to have the offender Gebhard and associates, however, indicate that brother- civilly committed to a mental hospital. In the internal political sister incest is about five times as common as father- hierarchy of a prison, the incest offender is generally consid- daughter incest. In the majority of cases the girl is at puberty ered a “patsy” and is used as a sexual object as well as being when the incest begins, and it tends to be protracted over a exploited in other ways. period of years rather than episodic. There is often enough Incestuous sex crimes, particularly when the father or psychological distance between a father and daughter to mother lives in the same home with the girl, pose difficult allow an attraction of the same type as is found to arise problems for law enforcement officers and social workers. between strangers, while there is at the same time sufficient Verification of an allegation of incest is not easy. Freud in his closeness between them to enable them to know each other analysis of Dora encountered difficulties in separating ac- well. Mother-son incest, on the other hand, resembles a cusations based on fact from fantasies and falsehoods. The return to the womb, and so rarely occurs, law or no law. failure to recognize a child’s fabrications as such can subject Furthermore, it would tend to rupture a basic nurturing the family to unnecessary and troublesome legal action. On relationship by converting it into a romantic one. the other hand, failure to recognize the falsity of a victim’s While broad, the incest laws in many states do not cover retraction of her previous allegation of incest can leave her in nonconsanguineous sexual relationships as between step- or danger of further abuse.

4 SIECUS Report, May 1979 The cessation of an incestuous relationship or the dis- One law commentator, who sees no compelling reason covery of it is more likely to precipitate a traumatic crisis than why sexual experiments between and the incest itself. Police preventive measures are almost im- (though hardly to be encouraged) should lead to criminal possible, and it is often necessary to remove the girl from the proceedings, suggests that the law of criminal incest might be home to prevent violence. The mother may also be in danger, abolished as such and replaced by a law of “ of for her may retaliate physically if she reports him to authority,” which would extend not merely to parents, but the police. Court action hardly ever solves the problem, since also to teachers and other persons in charge of young people a jail sentence serves only to remove the offending parent on (Honore, 1978). There are indeed already countries, such as a temporary basis, and the underlying problem which man- and Belgium, in which incest is not a crime but where ifested itself in the incestuous behavior still remains. Also, abuse of authority is punishable. If this policy is accepted, it there is trauma for the child in going to court. It often takes would not necessarily lead to any change in the law, there months or years for disposition of the case and she must being already many criminal statutes governing these sexual repeat her story many times. Then, if the offender is con- relations, but it might shift the focus of attention. victed or sent to jail, nothing much has really been accomplished-all parties are injured psychologically and References perhaps even physically. The threat of punishment, however, that may actually hang over an individual may deter the Daugherty, M. K. The crime of incest against the minor child and the offensive behavior, or may encourage counseling with posi- states’ statutory responses. journal of Farm/y Law, 1978, 17, 93. Eekelaar, J. J., & Katz, S. N. (Eds.). Family violence/An intemationa/ tive results. Once incest is disclosed, individuals who would and interdisciplinary study. Toronto:’ Butterworth, 1978. not actively seek counseling seem to welcome the opportu- Gebhard. P. H.. Caenon. I. H.. Pomerov. W. B.. & Christenson, C. V. nity and usually continue counseling after probation has Sex offend&s. “New’iorkl Harper & Row, 1965. ended. Honori, T. Sex law. London: Duckworth, 1978.

Dr. Calderone, the weather in the area at that time of year is mild, sunny, and dry during the day, cool at night. 1DO YOU KNOW THAT.. . This upcoming Congress in City will give profes- sionals across the United States an excellent opportunity to meet new colleagues in the field from the Latin American and Fourth World Congress of Caribbean countries. For detailed information about present- ing a paper and/or attending, write without delay to Dr. Juan Luis Alvarez-Cayou, President of the Organizing Committee, The Fourth World Congress of Sexology will be held in Fourth World Congress of Sexology, Apdo. Postal 61-057, Cd. Mexico City on December 16-21, 1979, with SIECUS again de Mexico, Mexico. serving as one of the sponsoring organizations. The profes- sional participation in the previous Congresses held in Paris (1974), Montreal (1976), and Rome (1978) indicated the in- Research Project tense interest around the world in the field of sexology. The Fifth Congress is already scheduled to take place in 1981 in Ron Mazur is seeking the names and locations of sexuality Jerusalem. educators, counselors, therapists, or researchers who work Representing SIECUS, Dr. Mary S. Calderone went to extensively with small groups. The goals may be general Mexico City in December 1978 to meet with the organizing education, personal/relational enrichment, therapy, or train- committee for the Fourth Congress. A number of papers have ing, and the settings may be clinical, academic, agency/ already been received, dealing with several of the approxi- institutional, or private practice, as long as the modality mately 40 topics being covered which include: sexology, the involves small groups. Persons engaged in such work in the church, and the politicians; sexology in countries around the area of human sexuality who are willing to consider respond- world; disease and the hyposexual effects of therapeutic ing to a written survey instrument are asked to write to Ron drugs; human sexual response: the state of the art; ethical Mazur, University Health Services, University of Mas- aspects on the issue of normality; ; sexual varia- sachusetts, Amherst, MA 01003. tion; surgery and sexuality; anthropology and sexuality; pub- licity and sexuality; and childhood sexuality. A series of courses and workshops will be offered during the week Conference on before the Congress. There will be ample space and facilities for exhibits, and excellent audio-visual facilities. The College of Family and Consumer Studies and the Office The social program is being carefully planned for those of Continuing Education at the University of Guelph. are accompanying the participants and speakers. Mexico is rich sponsoring a conference entitled “Adolescent Sexuality: A in lore, in historic pyramids and temples, sculptures and Need for Education and Understanding” at the university, on ceramics, relics of the ancient civilizations. There are also June 11-13, 1979. Of interest to teachers, health profession- beautiful Mexican handicrafts in museums and in mar- als, and social workers, the conference will deal with such ketplaces. During the Congress special programs for children issues as , , and . For and young people will be planned, and a fascinating series of further details write to Office of Continuing Education, pre- and post-Congress tours is being outlined. According to University of Guelph, Guelph, Ontario NIG 2W1, Canada.

SIECUS Report, May 1979 5 Last Taboo, Continued from page 2 tion of the authorities by a third party. It seems probable, if were generally agreed that incest or inbreeding in itself such evidence is available, based on the small percentage of caused no inherited damage to offspring. incest situations that actually make their way into clinical and More recent studies have cast some doubt on the matter. criminal files, that that portion of the incest iceberg lying Schull and Neel (1965) studied marriages in Japan and under the surface may bear even less resemblance to the found a significant increase in defects as the degree of portion that gets to the couch or the bench, despite what relationship became closer. Adams and Neel (1967) matched most authors suggest. 18 incestuous with nonincestuous mothers and If masturbation and have proven to cover found that at age 6 months only 7 of the 18 incestuous such a broad spectrum of behaviors and effects as to have children, born of father-daughter or brother-sister mar- little or no influence on most of their practitioners’ lives as a riages, were normal, as compared to 15 of the Ii3 control whole, what about incest? For a few people masturbation babies. Five of the incestuously begotten babies were dead. may be highly significant, just as for some homosexuality is While the selective nature of these samples throws consider- an important life determinant. But this is not true for the able doubt on their results, the controversy over the biologl- majority in either case, Incest may be more likely to have an cal impact of inbreeding is certainly not settled. Fortunately, effect than masturbation but less likely to have an effect than as far we know, very few cases of incest involve offspring. homosexuality, since it usually involves only a small portion Everything I have said so far, all based on the work of of the childhood years, whereas homosexuality generally experts over the years, has related to the impact of incest on continues throughout life. We will not know the answers people involved with the medical or criminal justice systems. until we have conducted longitudinal randomized studies We have seen that even with this unrepresentative sample, covering incestuous relationships that have never come to our attitudes toward incest have been called into question. social, therapeutic, or legal attention. The problem is much larger than this, however. What is Whether the population we are talking about is 5% (11 lacking is the realization that only a small proportion of the million) as some suggest, or 15% as Woodbury’s 1970 study population involved in incest actually reaches the medical/ suggested, it is hard to believe that uniformly horrendous therapy and/or criminal justice systems, and those who do so things have happened to so many people without anyone’s are hardly typical of the population as a whole. What about all awareness that something was amiss. Research to get at the those other people who practice incest but do not come to real facts is long overdue. One such study, recently reported the notice of therapists or the courts? Current books (several to the American Psychiatric Association annual meeting (Nel- of which are reviewed in this issue of the S/ECUS Report), like son, 1978), found certain “rare but undeniably healthy situa- many which have come before them, suggest that the effect tions where incest was an obviously appropriate behavior.” of incest is to ruin the lives of many of those involved. One of She also found a high correlation between abuse and nega- the authors reviewed in this issue quotes unnamed sources tively perceived incestuous experience as well as a high estimating that 25,000,OOO American women have been “sex- correlation between and positively perceived inces- ually abused” by their . Note the term used-not tuous experience. Contrary to her expectations, incest did “incest” but “sexual abuse.” Since this author (Armstrong, not occur primarily in families with a high level of dysfunc- 1978) equates incest with permanent damage to the victim, tion, and where dysfunction was present it was seldom she is therefore suggesting that 25 million women, more than possible to attribute its cause to the incestuous character of the entire population of individuals considered to have the experience. Whenever the incest situation isolated two or mental health problems, have been permanently damaged by more members from the rest of the family, there was guilt incest. Note also that she is speaking only of father-daughter and negativity in the report. Whenever the participants felt incest, which is not by a long shot the most prevalent type of they had the permission of the family, a positive report incest. Thus if we assume that more than 25 million women resulted. It is significant that Nelson found “several such have been permanently damaged by brother-sister incest, families where real or implied consent openly allowed active, the most prevalent type, we are being asked to believe that sophisticated lifestyles which included sexual sharing.” one out of every two American women is so damaged! But The Nelson study, the currently suppressed Kinsey perhaps Ms. Armstrong does not consider brother-sister study, and two others that I know of suggest that we do not incest permanently damaging. Could it have escaped this have the whole picture of incest before us and are therefore author, and others, that incest does not have the same impact not presently in a position to make valid pronouncements on a// participants? Or that the relationship and ages, the time and judgments about the nature of the practice. As a result, and place, the circumstances, and the type of behavior we may be doing considerable damage to those who have involved may give rise to variations in the effects of incest? been or are currently involved in incest. The blatant sen- Several authors concur with the observation of Walters sationalism of television, added to congressional hearings (1975) that “many are, in the truest sense of the word, which equate incest with rape, , violence, child their fathers’ lovers. Many have the same type of relationship slavery, and , combine to scapegoat many that adults have, and some resent community intervention, people. After a recent front-page incest story in one North and are difficult to work with, particularly when professionals Carolina newspaper, the sex “hotline” was deluged with calls carry over a cultural bias that incest is wrong and that by from women and girls with stories just like the one in the definition the girls should resent it.” When speaking of paper. It is easy to blame one’s problems on the latest family pressure on the child not to testify in court we often scapegoat. It is also easy to set up guilt reflexes where no ignore those instances in which incest victims flatly refuse to guilt existed before. We are all familiar with the scare tactics cooperate against a love partner. In such cases these individ- through which the government, the media, and the other uals and their families often appear happy and well adjusted defenders of morality turned millions of children into drug despite the incest-which was usually brought to the atten- addicts overnight because they had smoked grass. Today we

6 SIECUS Report, May 1979 have given up trying to make this absurdity stick. What is accomplished by informing young people that DO YOU KNOW THAT.. . they have been damaged “for life” by incest? We know there are some who have suffered irreversible damage, but that is no excuse for making sweeping generalizations about a group about which we know almost nothing at all-not even 1979 Summer Workshops: Addendum the extent of the group! As in the case of marijuana, we are convincing them they are damned without knowing anything See the March 1979 SIECUS Report for a complete listing. about them or their situations: just as the youngster who smoked one joint found him/herself branded a drug addict, California so the youngster who thinks maybe he or she was involved in incest (many do not know if they were or not) finds him/ University of California, San Francisco, Calif. herself branded as permanently damaged. l Women’s Sexual Health Educational Seminars (WISHES). lune l-2, 2 units nursing continuing education credit. Finally, there is a huge group of individuals who are l WlSHES Leadership Training. July 30-August 3, 3 nursing con- being damaged by our drum beating-those who have not tinuing education credits (pending). been involved in incest. American families have been so l Health Aspects of Human Sexuality. August 10-12, 2 nursing imbued with prohibitions against incest that they bend over continuing education credits. backward to avoid any possibility of incestuous involvement Write to: Jacki Reubens, Human Sexuality Program, University of California, 350 Parnassus, Suite 700, San Francisco, CA 94143. or the possible accusation that they might become involved. This results either in complete and total abandonment of all parent-child physical contact at puberty, just when the child Nevada needs its reassurance most, or in seductive behavior that never culminates in any manifest sexual activity, which James University of Nevada, Reno, Nev. l Home Economics 430, 630, Human Sexuality. July 30-August 17, Leslie McCary believed affects the child more negatively than 3 credits, graduate/undergraduate. does actual incest. This is a peculiarly American problem- Write to: Milton L. Nolin, PhD, School of Home Economics, Uni- the withdrawal of all touching contact-and children, espe- versity of Nevada, Reno, NV 89507. cially girls, feel the lack very keenly, because it comes at a time when they are also being told in many ways that they Vermont have become “unclean” through no fault of their own. The withdrawal of touching confirms the message. Who knows University of Vermont, Burlington, Vt. how much psychic damage we cause our children with such l EDOH292, SexEducation and Counseling. July 16-27,3 credits. Write to: Kay Frances Schmucker, EdD, University of Vermont, 146 well-meant yet inhuman attitudes? Who knows whether one South Williams St., Burlington, VT 05401. result may not be the present rash of feverish adolescent sexual activity with its undesirable results? How many adoles- cent girls have not said, “It’s the only time I feel someone Washington really loves me”? Whitworth College, Spokane, Wash., and Eastern Washington Uni- Surely the time has come when we can and should deal versity, Cheney, Wash. with the incest taboo by finding out the facts, all of them, and l Sex Education for Teachers and Youth Workers. June 19-July 12, acting rationally and sensibly about them, whatever they may 3 quarter credits. be. Write to: Floye V. Barland, Education Director, Planned Par- enthood of Spokane, YMCA Building, N. 507 Howard, Spokane, WA 99201. References

Adams, M., & Neel, J. Children of incest. Pediatrics, 1967,40, 5562. Armstrong, L. Kiss daddy goodnight. New York: Hawthorn, 1978. Sexuality and Symposium Cohen, Y. The disappearance of the incest taboo. Human Nature, July 1978. On May 18, 19, and 20, 1979, in San Francisco, a national Gerchow, J. Die inzestsituation. Beitrage zur Sexualforschung, 1965, symposium on is being held, spon- 34, 39-50. sored by the University of California (Schools of Medicine, Hiller, K. Das recht fiber sich selbst. Sexus. Leipzig, 1926. Maisch, H. Incest. New York: Stein and Day, 1972. Dentistry, Nursing, Pharmacy, Continuing Education in Mittermaier, W. Verbrechen und vergehen wider die Sittlichkeit. In Health Sciences, the Human Sexuality Program, and the Vergleichende Darstellung des deutschen und auslandischen Department of Psychiatry), the Israel Society for Rehabilita- Strafrechts (Vol. 4). Berlin, 1906. tion of the Disabled, and SIECUS. This symposium, especially Nelson, J. Incest behavior. Unpublished manuscript, 1978, reported in The Kansas City Times, October 26, 1978. designed for all health science practitioners, will be chaired Shull, W., & Neel, J. The effects of inbreeding on japanese children. by Evalyn S. Gendel, MD (member, SIECUS Board of Direc- New York: Harper & Row, 1965. tors), G. Bullard, PhD, and Susan E. Knight, MSW. The Schwab, C. Zur biologie des inzests. Mschr. Kriminalbiologie u. program will include discussions of sociosexual counseling Strafrechtsref, 1938, 29, 257. Sonden, T. Die inzest verbrechen in Schweden und ihre Ursachen. and education; the sexual implications of spinal cord injury, Acta Psychiatrische et Neurologica, 1936, II, 379. cerebral palsy, visual and hearing impairment, and various Stern, C. Principles of human genetics. London: W. H. Freeman, medical conditions: children’s, adolescents’ and women’s 1960. issues as they relate to sexuality and disability; and a review Walters, D. Physical and sexual abuse of children. Bloomington: and analysis of these issues from both national and interna- Indiana University Press, 1975. Weinberg, S. incest behavior. New York: Citadel, 1955. tional perspectives. A distinguished faculty will participate in Woodbury, J. Interview reported in the Los Angeles Times, 1970. the symposium.

SIECUS Report, May 1979 DO YOU KNOW THAT 1a 1

Resources to Write for . . . Sex Education for the Deaf-Blind, edited by Carmella Ficociello, is a compilation of the proceedings of the Adoles- cent Needs / Sex Education Workshop held in Dallas, Texas, The Youth Values Project, a 68-page booklet, is the report on in 1976, and sponsored by the South Central Regional Center a two-year study of adolescent sexuality conducted by teen- for Services to Deaf-Blind Children. The IlCpage booklet agers themselves in New York City. A confidential question- includes information under the following headings: “Human naire was developed and administered to 1000 13- through Sexuality Workshops,” ” Sensorially Impaired Adolescents 19-year-olds including every ethnic and income group. The and Questions on How to Meet Their Needs,” “Preparing a summary, written by the youth consultants, states: “In addi- Deaf-Blind Adolescent Female for her First Menses,” and tion to the factual information we learned about sex and birth “How Do We Help the Kids?” The appendices contain control, we had a chance to share our thoughts, feelings, and exercises, a bibliography, workshop evaluations, and infor- values with other teenagers and to learn that many of the mation on the use of the materials. The price of this compila- uncomfortable feelings we had were common and normal. tion is $5.70, plus $1.50 for postage and handling. Write to: This is what sex education should be like. Now we feel more South Central Regional Center, 2930 Turtle Creek Plaza, Suite able to think clearly about and understand our own sexuality. 216, Dallas, TX 75219. We [found out] how many harmful myths we have about ourselves and each other and that only through honest, Preparing Professionals for Family life and Human Sexuality difficult communication can we understand ourselves and Education, prepared by Frances W. Hamermesh for the grow as individuals and in relationships with other women Michigan Department of Public Health, Bureau of Personal and men.” Chapter headings are: “Problems, or Symptoms Health Services, is a comprehensive training package de- of Problems?” ‘I The Youth Values Project,” “Research Find- signed to meet the needs of both the specialist in teaching ings,” and “Recommendations.” The 17-page appendix is health education, human sexuality, and family life education, devoted to charts and tables. This report is valuable as a and all other teachers who may be integrating family life pattern for those interested in developing similar projects education into their programs or who must have an under- across the country. Single copies are $1.50. To order, standing of human development in their counseling and write: Susan Ross, Project Director, % The Experiment, communication with students. It includes a helpful section Kipling Road, Brattleboro, VT 05301. on curriculum development and community planning. Cop- ies may be obtained free of charge while the supply lasts Changes: Changes: Changes: you & your body, prepared by from the office of W. Stanley Kruger, Director, Parent/Early CHOICE (Concern for Health Options: Information, Care Childhood and Special Programs Staff, Bureau of Elementary and Education) of Philadelphia, is an excellent addition to the and Secondary Education, HEW, Office of Education, Wash- growing number of pamphlets written to help young people ington, DC 20202. understand the functions and meaning of human sexuality. The fact that 12 members of the CHOICE Teen Auxiliary Adolescent Fertility: Selected, Annotated Resources for the Committee assisted in the booklet’s preparation suggests International Community, published in November 1978 by that the questions and concerns dealt with reflect the ques- the Population Institute’s International Clearinghouse on tions and concerns of many contemporary adolescents. In- Adolescent Fertility, is a 60-page bibliography containing cluded in the easily readable text are such topics as puberty, annotations and ordering information for over 300 entries. It menstruation, penis size, masturbation, , birth con- is available at no cost to those in developing countries and trol, and deciding about sexual relationshps; there is also a for others at $150 (U.S. postpaid) per copy. Write to: glossary and a resource list, “Where To Go.” Single copies Population Institute, 110 Maryland Avenue NE, Washington, cost $1 plus 36$ postage. To order, write CHOICE, 1501 DC 20002. Cherry Street, Philadelphia, PA 19102. REHAB BRIEF (Bringing Research into Effective Focus) de- lasting longer: A Treatment Program for Premature Ejacula- voted its September 12, 1978, issue to the subject of “Sex tion by Sy Silverberg, a physician specializing in sexual Counseling for Handicapped Persons-An Avenue toward therapy, is a 31-page booklet which demythologizes the Intimacy.” This four-page leaflet contains a great deal of premature therapeutic regime and provides a useful information about recent literature and research in the simply explained and easy-to-follow program designed to area of sexuality and disability, and also gives rehabilitation promote control. It deals in detail with the process of using counselors concrete suggestions-that are applicable to masturbation as an initial self-learning technique, and in- other health care and counseling professionals-on dealing cludes brief but helpful information for men on female with a disabled person’s need to discuss sexual concerns. To sexuality. While it is expensive considering the quality of its request copies of this issue of the BRIEF (available without printing and binding ($3.95 plus $1 postage and handling), it charge while supplies last) or to be placed on a mailing list to is a useful resource in the area of . To receive REHAB BRIEFS on other topics as well, write to the order, write: Nemaya Publishing, 1950 Yonge Street, Toronto Rehabilitation Research Institute, Box J-155 Health Center, M4S 124, Ontario, Canada. University of , Gainesville, FL 32610.

8 SI ECUS Report, May 1979 IAUDIO-VISUAL REVIEWS

Sex and the Heart Patient. 16 mm, duce visual media which are extremely method for pleasuring the female. sound/color, 30 min. Produced for useful as adjuncts to professional sex Permission for manual or oral-genital Burroughs-Wellcome Co. by Synthesis therapy. The two-part series portrays a stimulation is subtly included, allowing Communications, 119 West 57th St., fully clothed young couple talking in the viewers to appreciate the fact that New York, NY 10019. (To arrange for a the therapist’s office and, as they con- vaginal intercourse may at times not be free showing, contact Educational Ser- tinue to describe their actions, feel- reliable for bringing the female to or- vices Department, Burroughs-Well- ings, and discoveries, the scene shifts gasm. come Co., 3030 Cornwallis Rd., Re- to their bedroom at home. In the sub- These films are most useful in cases search Triangle Park, NC 27709.) sequent sensitive, explicit scenes, we of fairly clear-cut psychogenic dysfunc- see the couple begin their homework tion where performance demands have Reviewed by Ellen Berman, MD, As- exercises with sensate focus. Part 1 been identified as a major inhibiting sociate Professor of Psychiatry, Director shows the nonsexual phase but then factor. The couple shown is young, of Clinical Training, Marriage Council of moves into later phases which include attractive, and verbal, but not without Philadelphia, University of Pennsylva- genital caressing and verbal feedback. human imperfections. In the film both nia. Unfortunately, the ofttimes slow and partners acknowledge their parts in the This film on sexual functioning in post- gradual sensate focus process is con- sexual expectations, but are reassured coronary patients deals with a number densed into one film, whereas in that theirs is a typical problem. The of the salient issues involved, such as therapy the therapist might wish to outcome is successful, and the im- the actual amount of stress on the heart assign many smaller tasks involving proved sexual interaction clearly en- during intercourse, and the fears, con- nonsexual touching before introducing hances the caring relationship of that cerns, and depression which may de- the more threatening task of genital couple. velop. It contains general counseling pleasuring. In this regard, it is helpful These films will be a welcome addi- suggestions for use by the physician. to the therapist using this series also to tion to those clinicians and academi- Actual cardiac patients are interviewed have available the four-part EDCOA cians who are building their film li- in the hospital or home, and attention films entitled Sensate Focus, which can brary, although EDCOA’s more gener- is given to such issues as the appropri- be integrated in a way to take full ally applicable Sensate Focus series and ate time for the resumption of sexual advantage of both series when working Partner Genital Exam films might best activities and the frequently found with males presenting erectile dysfunc- be purchased first. It should also be postcoronary depression. The discus- tions. cautioned that owning and showing sion of sexual counseling emphasizes Part 2 of Overcoming Prob- films do not per se bestow professional the necessity for nongcnital pleasuring /ems focuses on genital-to-genital con- skills on the untrained, but that such in addition to intercourse. tact and, eventually, on vaginal con- films are of real value only when inte- While the film does not contain many tainment and thrusting, but without grated skillfully into a well-planned, suggestions for dealing with the aggrandizing intercourse as the only individualized treatment program. , or illustrate with a doctor/ patient interview the taking of a sexual history or actual sex counseling proce- dures, it is nevertheless useful, up to date, and worth seeing. Being very medically oriented, it would probably What some users of EDCOA patient be most appropriate for medical stu- dents, residents, or other health per- counseling films have to say about them* sonnel. “The Edcoa set of cassette films and “The Edcoa Marital-Sexual Patient Technicolor projector has proved to Counseling Films are ideal for Overcoming Erection Problems. Pro- be a great help to our clinic. Not only teaching medical students and any duced and directed by Richard Price, are the films well made and helpful, others training in human sexuality.” 1978. Super 8 mm and 16 mm, color/ both with patients and our trainees John Money, Ph.D. sound. Part 1: 12 min. Part 2: 9 min. learning techniques of therapy, but Johns Hopkins Medical School Edcoa Productions, Inc., 310 Cedar the ease and convenience of the Lane, Teaneck, NJ 07666. Purchase, system is exceptional.” We have Joshua S. Golden, M.D. $250 each; rental, $45 each. Neuro-Psychiatric Inst. the Reviewed by Robert W. Birch, PhD, U.C.L.A. Medical School private practice of , Colum- ‘Original leters on file. SystemTM bus, Ohio.

Richard Price has, in these two films, again demonstrated his ability to pro-

SIECUS Report, May 1979 JOURNAL REVIEWS

THE JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH generalizations are made but results may perceive it as a marital “obliga- indicate some approval of, but no use tion.” If this is so, then look of, sexual intercourse; majority ap- upon sex as a commitment, a means to (Society for the Scientific Study of Sex, proval of, but no use of, partner surro- an end rather than an end in itself. The % Mrs. Mary B. Westervelt, 208 Daf- gates. Nonerotic and nonexplicit sexual authors further hypothesize that the fodil Road, Glen Burnie, MD 21061) contacts were approved by a majority, notion that wives are more concerned Reviewed by Lester A. Kirkendall, PhD, and used by many. Certain inhibiting than with companionship in Professor Emeritus of Family Life Educa- factors were mentioned: personal marriage may be in error. tion, Oregon State University, Corval- qualms, lack of legal or professional /is; and member, SIECUS Advisory sanctions, inadequate training, and the Panel. feeling that the use of these techniques Vol. 14, No. 4, November 1978 would be therapeutically counter- Volume 14, No. 1, February 1978 productive. Client request might be Sex Role Perceptions and the facilitative. Decision. Raye Hudson Rosen and Lois Concerning and the J. Martindale. Multiple in Males. Mina B. Female Prostate. J. Lowndes Sevely In a study of 1281 women with “prob- Robbins and Cordon D. Jensen. and J. W. Bennett. lem” , 921 chose to inter- The thesis is that multiple orgasms in Two issues are discussed here. First, rupt and 360 chose to complete preg- males are possible through conscious the assertion is made that women’s and nancy. The mean age of the aborters control of moods and circumstances men’s sexual anatomies have more was 22 (range 14-49), with 80% unmar- surrounding sexual encounter. In a similarities than differences when it ried. The mean age of the pregnancy study, 13 male subjects reported from 3 comes to coital responses. Females are completers was 18 (range 13-34), with to 10 orgasms or more in each coital declared to possess the equivalent of a 84% unmarried. The data, collected in experience. At this point, the essential male’s prostate gland in their urethral 1974-75 were obtained by an anony- physiological features are speculative, glands, which help to produce genital mous questionnaire. Findings related but seemingly involve thrusting and wetness, a discernible sign of sexual primarily to two items-the extent to breathing patterns, and conscious arousal. In this sense, women may be which the subjects considered them- awareness by both partners that male said to ejaculate. Table 1, “Homo- selves adherents of traditional feminine multiple orgasms are possible. logues in Female and Male Urogenital roles, e.g., “An unmarried mother is Anatomy,” shows the extent to which more immoral than an unmarried the genital anatomies of the two sexes Volume 14, No. 2, May 1978 father,” and their own perceived confi- are similar. dence, e.g., “I often run into things I Second, the authors note that many Recreational Sexuality Preferences can’t handle” as against “I can handle misunderstandings of female and male Among Middle-Class Husbands and most problems as they come up.” The sexual functioning are rooted in Wives. Jay M. Mancini and Dennis K. aborters as a group were found to be semantic confusion and errors in Orthner. “significantly higher in perceived con- biological understanding. The authors In a survey, 227 husbands and 233 fidence” than pregnancy completers. note the confusion they state exists in wives were asked to indicate prefer- However, as regards traditional the work of , and ences throughout their marriage rela- feminine roles the black aborters were postulate that the distinctions made by tionship for three types of leisure-time significantly less traditional than the Reich, Lowen, Kinsey, and Money are activities: sexual or affectional, joint, or blacks who chose to complete their more accurate. independent. The first, while it ranked pregnancies, a distinction that did not first for 45% of the husbands and 26% hold for the whites. These differences Clinicians’ Attitudes Toward, and Use of the wives, decreased as the number remained when age was controlled. of, Four Body Contact or Sexual of years of marriage increased. For the Techniques with Clients. Michael Len husbands, their preference for both A Survey of Sexual Attitude Reassess- and Joel Fischer. joint and independent activities in- ment and Restructuring Seminars. A self-selected sample of 46 private creased, although the increase for in- Richard W. Wollert. practitioners in psychiatry, psychology, dependent activities was smaller. For In rating the effectiveness of their social work, and marriage and family the wives, the proportion prefering in- SAR programs, 11 directors of SAR counseling, using an unsigned ques- dependent activities increased while seminars used subjective judgments, tionnaire, expresses the attitudes of those who prefered joint activities based mainly on clinical impressions. these toward, and their use with clients tended to remain at the same level. The researcher concluded that, with of, nonerotic physical contacts, explicit The authors hypothesize that males continuing use of SARs for profession- sex contacts, sexual intercourse with are more ready than females to per- al training, there is a clear-cut need patients, and partner surrogates. No ceive “sex as ,” whereas wives for more research.

10 SIECUS Report, May 1979 BOOK REVIEWS

RECENT BOOKS ON INCEST: that place the percentage of incest vic- all children are victimized. Butler also A SELECTION tims in the population as high as 30%. prefers a definition of incest that in- That would be 66 million victims, and of eludes even nonphysical acts. Thus “a Reviewed by James W. Ramey, EdD, course 66 million aggressors, or a total father who watches his daughter un- Visiting Professor, Department of of one out of every three men and dress is raping her as surely as the Psychiatry, Bowman Gray School of women in the nation. Her own estimate father who violently and forcibly Medicine, Winston-Salem, North is only 20 million victims, or one out of her body [my italics].” Once again we Carolina. every five women (which implies one have a book based on skewed mate- of every five men is an aggressor). It is rials, so that it tells us something, al- Kiss Daddy Goodnight. Louise difficult to believe that an author who though not very much, about the 130 Armstrong. New York: Hawthorn seriously quotes such figures can be women interviewed, but not much Books, 1978 (256 pp.; $9.95). relied upon in general. The final chap- about the phenomenon of incest. On page 241 in an Afterword the ter, “Learning to Trust Again,” is the author states that the goal of this book best. Too bad there wasn’t more of it. Incest, Karen Meiselman. San Fran- is “to define incest in people’s minds as cisco: Jossey-Bass, 1978 (366 pp.; sexual abuse of children.” (The dictio- Conspiracy of Silence: The Trauma of $15.00). nary defines incest as “the crime of Incest. Sandra Butler. San Francisco: Readers seriously interested in the sexual intercourse between persons re- New Glide Publications, 1978 (208 pp,; study and treatment of cases of incest lated by blood or marriage within the $10.00). that come to the attention of the degrees in which marriage is prohib- This is yet another book that is long therapeutic community should avoid ited.“) She attempts to accomplish on sensational prose and short on use- the three books discussed in the pre- this goal by relating the cases of 16 able material. It is based on 130 inter- ceding reviews and begin with this one. women out of 183 interviewed, includ- views, about half of which involved Dr. Meiselman has conducted a schol- ing herself. It is difficult to determine prostitutes, or women in alcohol- or arly study, reported in easy-to-read the degree of bias in the work because drug-abuse programs. No standardized fashion, of 58 active clinical incest the author provides no statistical data data are reported. The book focuses on cases, 47 of which have been seen over of any sort, merely stating that the 16 lack of professional services for incest an average of .I5 years. She has are “representative” of the 183. How victims, with the implicit assumption employed two control groups, one of did she pick these 16 cases? Why these that mental health professionals are 100 cases for general demographic in- 16 and not some other 161 In view of unwilling to provide such services. The formation and the other of 50 cases the author’s tendency to make unsup- author pays lip service to the trauma chosen at random from clinic files as a ported statements, e.g., repeating the involved in official recognition of incest specific control group of women over estimate of unnamed others that 25 but appears not to realize that while 12. While there is some question about million women in this country have her plea for providing services outside the appropriateness of this latter sam- been sexually abused by their fathers the framework of official reporting is ple, which might have been more mean- (p. 9), it is hard to take her seriously. praiseworthy, to do so would place the ingful had it been a matched sample In view of the sensational nature of the providers themselves in legal jeopardy based on demographic and diagnostic prose, one wonders about the real in- in many jurisdictions. The real culprit is factors, this remains one of the few tent of the book. the law itself. Until we recognize the studies with controls and one of three need to abolish incest laws and instead that are longitudinal. Betrayal of Innocence: Incest and Its utilize existing child abuse and rape The author presents historic material Devastation. Susan Forward and Craig laws to handle those cases that warrant in some detail and compares her clini- Buck. Los Angeles: J. P. Tarcher, 1978 criminal prosecution, such services will cal data with previously published (198 pp.; $8.95). remain hard to find. studies. Her estimate of the number of This book is based on 20 case studies Butler says, “Other studies conclude incest cases in the United States is of incest, examinations of their causes, that 80% of the children are victimized between 1% and 2%. This book is read- and treatment suggestions from a by an adult they know and trust” (p. able and comprehensive insofar as clin- therapeutic practice. The cases are 16), suggesting that somewhere near ical studies go. It does not deal with the presented in a rather flip manner and half of the adults are victimizers! Yet nonclinical population because the au- there is far too much case presentation her figures for the Santa Clara County thor does not have access to this popu- and far too little discussion. Again we incest program, multiplied by a factor lation. She has not fallen into the trap have a quotation of unnamed sources of 10, would only suggest that 0.05% of of going out to find victims of incest in

____~ Audience Level Indicators: C-Children (elementary grades), ET-Early teens (junior high), LT-Late teens (senior high), A-College, general adult public, P-Parents, PR-Professionals. -~~ - ~~- ~ ~~-~~

SIECUS Report, May 1979 11 the highways and byways of life. She physical disabilities. Its juxtaposition- grams. The author emphasizes that, for explicitly indicates how unproductive ing of the sexual growth and develop- the able-bodied as well as the physi- this would be, since those who volun- ment patterns of both the able-bodied cally disabled, sexual responsibility- teered would automatically be suspect. and the disabled is designed to help including alternatives, choices, ac- She appears, however, to be blind to rehabilitation professionals better un- countability, rights, privileges, and so- the possibility that clinical patients are derstand and anticipate the impact of cial support-is an active learning pro- not representative of all incest partici- physical disability on sexual growth and cess which cannot take place in a vac- pants, since very few people become maturation as well as on sexual func- uum. involved with psychotherapy. A, PR tion, and also to expand their counsel- The third chapter deals with dating, ing methods in the development of courtship, and marriage. The develop- Physical and Sexual Abuse of Children. responsive and responsible sexuality. ment of sexual desire and gratification David R. Walters. Bloomington: In- Each of the six chapters deals with have direct implications for the physi- diana University Press, 1975 (192 pp.; various aspects of the life cycle: normal cally disabled adult. Often the body $4.95). sexual development, the impact of image, the degree of self-esteem, and This is a practical handbook on phys- physical disabilities upon the normal the nature of the disability-congeni- ical and sexual child abuse, diagnosis, stages, and current societal attitudes tal, acquired, or chronic-may affect and treatment, written for the profes- toward developmental behaviors in the ability to perform the “athletics of sional in the medical or criminal justice matters of sexual expression. sex.” To help individuals cope with system but very readable and worth- The first chapter addresses early the fears, anxieties, and vulnerabil- while for the layman who wants to psychosexual development, basic ities involved in fulfilling sexual po- know how to spot child abuse and what genetic factors, and the early shaping tentials, they should be given the to do about it. The levelheaded, com- of male and female characteristics. So- necessary information on contracep- monsense approach of this book is ciety’s reaction to “imperfection” leads tion, childbirth, differences in relation- refreshing. Child abuse is a murky sub- to the message that chronic disability ships and lifestyles, as outlined in the ject, almost completely lacking in re- desexualizes. Infancy, nurturing, emo- book, and then be shown how to com- search, and this author is keenly aware tional development, and gender iden- municate as effectively as possible of that fact. I strongly recommend this tity and role formation comprise impor- within interpersonal relationships. book to both professional and general tant baselines for school-age sexual de- Also, as the author points out, the audiences, especially the last four chap- velopment and role definition. The im- sexual problems and concerns can ters, which deal with sexual abuse and portance of education in sexuality for have an impact not only on the dis- strategies for change. Chapter 8 begins a// children is stressed, with emphasis abled person but on his/her intimate with a listing of the myths about sexual given to the necessity of dealing di- partner as well. abuse, followed by the facts in each rectly and honestly with facts, informa- Chapter 4, “Priorities for ,” instance. Chapters 9, on treatment or tion, and behavioral expectations. It is by its very size (14 pages) indicates the lack of it, and 10, on observations further stressed that disabled children paucity of our knowledge about “par- about abused children, should be read must have informed and competent enting” by the physically disabled along with the Meiselman book. Fi- role models who recognize the impor- adult. Sex roles, ability, nally, Chapter 11, on strategies for tance of the formative years in the genetic concerns, pregnancy hazards, change, goes far beyond anything I development of mature sexual health. and struggles with responsibility and have yet read in terms of both short-, Chapter 2 explores sociosexual de- decision making regarding pregnancy intermediate-, and long-range goals. A, velopment in adolescence and youth, and , all affect parenting deci- P, PR new experiences, values and attitudes, sions. Robinault encourages the con- early sexual activity, sex role and sex tinual development of resources and role expression. “it is necessary to dis- counseling services and techniques to tinguish between the developmental respond to these pressing social needs achievements of individuals, as well as of the handicapped individual and fam- Sex, Society, and the Disabled: A De- the different stages in which they have ily. One of the largest and most con- velopmental Inquiry into Roles, Reac- become disabled: congenital, prepu- trolling difficulties a disabled individual tions, and Responsibilities. Isabel P. bertal, adolescent, young adult.” The may face, particularly in a hospital or Robinault. Hagerstown, Md.: Harper stigma of being conspicuously disabled institutional setting, is the lack of pri- and Row (Medical Department), 1978 can influence the amount and degree vacy for sexual expression and inti- (273 pp.; $14.95). to which a young person is capable of macy, a lack which may adversely affect exploring and experiencing emerging positive development in the sexual life Reviewed by Theodore M. Cole, MD, sexual maturity and values. cycle. Professorand Chairman, Department of The author stresses the importance Chapter 5 describes many specific Physical Medicine and Rehabiliation, for a// youth to have opportunities to problems affecting sexual function, University of Michigan, Ann Arbor; and learn the language of sexuality. such as drugs, chemotherapy, bowel Sandra S. Cole, BA, Adjunct Instructor, Homosexual behavior in the develop- and bladder function, specific organ or Department of Physical Medicine and ing adolescent is discussed with histor- bodily dysfunctions, and surgical pro- Rehabilitation and Department of ical and current information. Con- cedures. This chapter will be particu- Psychiatry, University of Michigan. traception, sterilization, abortion, and larly useful for both health profession- This book presents a chronological dis- venereal disease are discussed in the als and their physically disabled pa- cussion of the sexuality of people with context of sound sex education pro- tients or clients.

12 SI ECUS Report, May 1979 The last chapter, which deals with longs, i.e., on the self. Those who are to consider when selecting a therapist, the sexual adjustment involved in the ready and willing to assume such re- In writing this book, Gary Kelly ex- aging process, points out that society in sponsibility for their own sexuality will pressed the hope that a man who reads general is beginning to recognize that benefit the most from using it. Others and uses it will “feel good about being “sexuality in later years exists in one perhaps will not “use” it, but will a sexually fulfilled man,” that he will go form or another in all persons,” and nevertheless find the book interesting beyond the self-alienating aspects of that disease, disability, or chronic ill- and informative reading as well as a personality toward the enjoyment of ness during this period may have many helpful reference and food for thought his total being in his feelings and con- varied effects. The insights provided that may lead to future “use.” nections with other human beings. can be useful for the professional A second strength is that it reassur- Both men and women will gain much counseling the “middlescent” and the ingly grants “permission” to men to from its reading and use. A, PR aged. become more fully sexual. About two- Sex, Society, and the Disabled is a thirds of the book deals with such re- well-organized book. In addition to de- lated issues as “Men and Good Sex,” tailed references, comprehensive ap- “Communication,” “Using What Sex and the . Jane Adams. pendices are included citing informa- You’ve Got,” “Making It Together,” New York: Coward, McCann and tion currently available in the United “Fulfilling Male Sexuality,” and in- Geoghegan, Inc., 1978 (314 pp.; $8.95). States regarding resources, programs, cludes important, often overlooked is- Reviewed by Ellen Tuchler, MSW, clini- bibliographies, statistics, position sues for men such as self-image, body cal social worker and psychotherapist, statements, projects on sexuality and responses, mythologies, jealousy, Catholic Charities Community Life special groups, and programs for train- women’s needs and responses, preg- Center, Bay Shore, N. Y.; and member, ing. An important addition to the grow- nancy, birth, fatherhood, brotherhood, New York Society for Psychoanalysis. ing collection of resource materials on selfhood, and feeling good. the human sexuality concerns of the A third strength, and perhaps its In the opening pages of Sex and the physically disabled, this book provides most unique offering, is the inclusion Single Parent the reader recognizes the clinician with a marvelous oppor- of a multitude of practical self-help that this book is not just another pop- tunity to reassess his/her own sexual suggestions, checklists, exercises, self- psychology treatment of unwedded attitudes. PR inventories, questionnaires, and rating bliss. Nor is it a scientifically conducted scales distributed throughout the social survey on changing mores book. While both private and “with among sexually active separated, di- partner” usages are suggested, the au- vorced, or widowed parents. It more Good Sex: A Healthy Man’s Guide to thor demythologizes the idea that “the nearly resembles a 20th-century Pil- Sexual Fulfillment. Gary F. Kelly. New only way to work on sexual problems is grim’s Progress, revealing a portrait of York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1979 with your spouse or .” the author as a complex, engaging, (235 pp.; $8.95). The remaining one-third of the book human, and therefore sexual person. addresses the specific problem areas of As such, she struggles to integrate Reviewed by James A. Siefkes, MDiv, and impotence. many basic yet often opposing roles in Director for Discovering Ministries, Di- It also deals with other problem areas a society which too often militates vision for Service and Mission in (some only mentioned as referral areas) against such a synthesis. She seeks to America, The American Lutheran that may be cause for loss of male sex resolve her identity crisis by question- Church, Minneapolis, Minnesota. and enjoyment, “unless he takes some ing friends, children, families, The target audience for this new self- action,” e.g., , neighbors, lovers, and professionals. help book is “males who want to work interest lag, win-lose games, and body Through this sharing of her struggle for more total sexual fulfillment problems (penis and prostate, stroke, with the reader, the book gains in valid- through a greater awareness of their heart, VD, spinal cord injury, body fit- ity. bodies, emotions, and abilities to ness, diet, alcohol, and drugs). It is a realistic piece of work because communicate with other human be- In taking a first and important step it is by and about real people coping ings.” The book shows promise of away from the illness or medical model with their needs in very human ways. achieving such goals remarkably well. to a more holistic approach to sexual Some of them are brave and honest, It is short enough (235 pages) to be concerns, Kelly has made a unique con- some are frightened and cynical. Some accessible to the busy person or non- tribution to “the brotherhood” with have learned to grow from their ex- reader; practical enough to provide this book. He has succeeded in de- periences, while others have settled for many self-help approaches to com- mythologizing some of the “compli- less than they could have achieved be- munications, understanding, and cated aura” that has grown up around cause they are still ruled by an in- therapeutic technique; on target sex therapy and emphasized the good grained morality. Some have found enough to provide insights, direction, principles of a commonsense approach unique solutions to meet their needs as and counsel for the majority of the sex- and the struggle for, and meaning of, parents and lovers, while others are ual concerns of men; gentle, caring, good communication. While he has of- still searching and questioning. and sensitive enough to stay in touch fered concrete suggestions for help, he What really makes this book unique, with the reader. is also careful to point out the impor- however, is that Jane Adams lets chil- A great strength of the book is its tance of recognizing when outside help dren themselves comment on their consistent placement of responsibility may be necessary, and he provides an perceptions of their parents’ struggles for one’s sexuality where it rightly be- adequate bibliography and suggestions to become whole people. As the title

SIECUS Report, May 1979 13 suggests, whatever solutions these parent’s unresolved problems are Side Effects of Sex Bias.” The book mothers and fathers find, the struggle passed on to the next generation like a concludes with an overview of the is less around their sexuality than it is contagious disease. If that develop- economic basis of women’s victimiza- around the real and imagined effects mental stumbling block centers around tion. on the children. To share with the one’s struggle to develop and become The common thread that connects all reader how one put one’s life together a sexually well-adjusted adult, it is prac- the articles is that victimization of again after the trauma of death or di- tically axiomatic that the parent will women is rooted in their economic vorce, or made certain decisions be- have enormous difficulty in dealing dependence and sense of powerless- cause of or in spite of the children, and with both the child’s and his or her ness. While the theme may not be new, for the reader then to hear these same own sexuality. it is one that needs to be stressed and children’s observations about whether Ultimately Jane Adams finds some- restressed. There is a tendency to deny or not those decisions are viable or thing that works for her and her two the vulnerability of those who are de- destructive to the relationship in- children. She does not proselytize, and pendent on others for their economic volved, is a revealing and unusual ex- she does not advocate any particular and emotional survival. This is clearly perience. solution. Instead, she shares her intel- reflected in the opposition to the ERA This is not a denial of the fact that lectual and emotional struggles and by many women who prefer to main- these parents (primarily women, which growing pains with the reader and we tain the status quo of the double stan- merely reflects the fact that mothers end up feeling that we have met a dard, an unrealistic position when one are still in the majority as caretaker thinking, feeling, and responsible considers that women comprise 41% of parents) must and do struggle with human being. Her “solution” may not the labor force. Men and women who their needs as they search for a sexual be a panacea for every single parent, resist the single standard are inclined ethic. Everyone who has ever dealt with but she explores such a variety of solu- to view the victimization of women as a divorced or widowed person on a tions and styles that there is something personal aberrations, thus deflecting professional or personal basis knows in it for just about every person faced attention from the inequities of the that they must come to terms with with similar problems in living. social system. feelings of guilt, anger, inadequacy, Jane Adams is a professional writer as The thrust of this book is toward and failure when a marriage termi- well as an intelligent and thoughtful overcoming the self-castigation and nates. The decisions that the adults interviewer and observer of interper- mutual victimization that sex-role interviewed by Ms. Adams have made, sonal relationships. She writes in an stereotyping tends to foster and social however, are heavily influenced by easy and thought-provoking style institutions tend to reinforce. The their roles as custody parents: “How which ranges from personal narrative editors provide a brief historical review will my need for intimacy affect the to expert opinion garnered from pro- of how gender-role expectations have children?” is of paramount concern to fessionals. I recommend this book cast women in the role of victims. The most of them. Ironically, the children both to practitioners dealing with ensuing articles demonstrate how the see their parents’ sexuality as a “giv- single-parent families (as family sys- victim, be she a battered woman or a en,” for despite the attempts of many tems or as individuals), as well as to the victim of rape, experiences guilt and a parents to hide or actually avoid sexual members of single-parent families sense of low self-esteem, thus fulfilling relationships, their children of all ages themselves, including adolescents. LT, the prophecy of defeat and subservi- “know” and react to this knowledge as A, P, PR ence to men. they would to any other piece of pa- The writers view sex inequality as the rental behavior. Some try to sabotage major reason for the victimization of the relationship, some use it to fill women and indicate changes needed some of their own needs, some imitate The Victimization of Women (Sage in the social rearing of children, in the it by acting out, some overtly express Yearbooks in Women’s Policy Studies, educational system, the mass media, in their anger and jealousy, some manip- Vol. 3). Jane Roberts Chapman and police techniques, and in the criminal ulate or drive the adults into meeting Margaret Gates, eds. Beverly Hills, justice system. While they acknowl- their normal sexual needs with furtive- Calif.: Sage Publications, 1978 (278 pp.; edge that overall social attitudes to- ness and guilt, etc. The fact remains $18.50 hardcover, $7.95 paper). women must be revised in order that a// the children, from toddlers to to eliminate woman’s victimization, Reviewed by Alice Scourby, PhD, As- adolescents, are fully aware of their they as practitioners make efforts to sociate Professor and Coordinator, parents’ sexual needs and what those treat the symptoms of these social Women’s Studies Program, Long Island parents do in order to come to terms aberrations. Realistically, they recog- University, C. W. Post Center, Creen- with these needs. nize that many of the measures they vale, New York. To those of us in the fields of mental offer are only “stop-gap” measures, health and education, this comes as no The editors have brought together an but they are hopeful that in the long surprise. The decision to have children impressive collection of articles au- run these measures will serve to effect is often made consciously or uncon- thored by practitioners, planners, and a degree of social change in a society sciously in an attempt to relive and policy-oriented professionals. The writ- where the validation of self-worth is rectify developmental conflicts vicari- ing is concise, clear, and replete with still determined by masculine norms. ously (e.g., “If I can only have a child, current research and data on rape, sex- An interesting point made was that then I’ll finally be loved”). Sometimes a ual abuse of children, battered women, abuse tends to cut across parent succeeds in “growing up” with the prostitute, , and economic and educational lines. This his or her child, but more often the a chapter on “Women’s Health: The seems to suggest that in those cases

14 SIECUS Report, May 1979 where women are not economically therapy is needed, a competent The authors stress that the cor- dependent on men, they have psychiatric referral is indicated. She nerstone to building a solid foundation nevertheless internalized a sense of advises the single or widowed reader of mutual understanding and trust is low self-esteem through the socializa- against going to a psychotherapist who the opening up of lines of communica- tion process. A sense of powerless- feels that women are fulfilled only as tion. Emphasizing the important role ness, therefore, may exist despite a wives and mothers, because she thinks the father plays throughout all stages of woman’s economic independence. l this therapist would probably consider the daughter’s development, they do not believe this weakens the central such an over-50 woman “finished.” point up the need for both parents to message of the book, i.e., that Throughout the book there is a defi- relate to her as an individual in her own economic dependence makes for vic- nite identification with the liberated right. This may be difficult for parents timization, but instead increases the woman, but also a very real recognition who are continually being bombarded poignancy of women’s position in our that the over-50 woman today grew up by new societal concepts of childrear- society by pointing out the more subtle in an era where role stereotypes were ing and role modeling, many of which and covert ways that subordinate and the rule. Also, the author makes a sin- are in conflict with one another, and superordinate roles are internalized. cere effort to dispel the still solidly most of them in conflict with the par- This book would serve as a valuable entrenched myths concerning sexuality ent’s own upbringing. resource for classes in the behavioral and aging. In 1956 a group of doctors, including sciences. A, PR Ms. Nudel’s coverage of the es- Dr. Chess, established the New York trogen-replacement controversy is Longitudinal Study of Child Develop- sound. Her advice concerning a late, ment to assess in very young babies the menopausal pregnancy is excellent. role that individual differences play in a For the Woman over 50: A Practical Her section on testosterone replace- child’s development. The study estab- ment, however, appears dubious. In lished nine major categories of be- Guide for a Full and Vital life. Adele the chapter “Strategies for the Career havior in which differences of temper- Nudel. New York: Taplinger Publishing Woman,” her discussion of political ament express themselves. Ascertain- Co., Inc., 1978 (436 pp.; $12.50). awareness was discerning, but she im- ing the child’s predispositions at this Reviewed by Ruth H. Chapman, plies that it is permissible to subtract a early stage allows parents to temper MSW, Board Member and Volunteer few years from your age, and that if you their reactions to their daughter’s par- Counselor, Community Sex Informa- are comfortable doing it, you might ticular behavior, thereby creating an tion, Inc., New York City. even stretch the truth a bit concerning atmosphere more conducive to peace- Although the author terms her book a your academic achievement. The latter ful coexistence for the entire family. guide, it actually is more an all- appears unethical as well as risky. “The The establishment of communication encompassing reference volume for Forty-five Ways to Look and Feel Fan- lines in infancy among all the individ- the over-50 woman. It covers a mul- tastic!” seemed a bit out of place in a uals in the family should make it easier titude of topics from “Returning to serious book. The suggestions were for to work out together the inevitable School ,” “What to Do About Your the most part well chosen, but the problems which will arise in the daugh- Aged Parent,” and “Getting the Best author’s expectations for facelifts may ter’s uphill climb toward indepen- Medical Care,” to “Forty-five Ways to be overly optimistic. dence. Look and Feel Fantastic!” Much of the In sum, this seems to be an excellent The book emphasizes that sex educa- information in several of these and book. While it has universal appeal for tion does not start with a “when she’s other chapters is extremely factual, in- all older women, it may be particularly ready” discussion of the birds and bees cluding names and addresses of or- useful for those with limited formal but rather in the child’s earliest years, ganizations and agencies which pro- education and, perhaps, limited in- as she is exposed to the interpersonal vide information and services. come. For this latter reason the re- relationships around her. The manner The chapters entitled “Sex, Relation- viewer hopes that libraries will see fit to in which her simplest questions are ships, Divorce and Remarriage,” “Your purchase it for their shelves, as the very answered is also important to consider. Changing Marriage,” and “Silence women who would find it most valu- The authors point out that girls be- about Our Changing Bodies,” are able might be deterred by the purchase tween the ages of 9 and 12 are more thoughtfully and sensitively written. Al- price of $12.50. A influenced by what they observe or though the elements of depression and experience than by what they are told. sense of loss are dealt with realistically, They are more concerned with the the prevailing attitude of the book is human values of relationships than the positive, encouraging, and challenging. : From Infancy to Indepen- physical aspects; the physicality of sex- The brief case studies of actual over-50 dence. Stella Chess and Jane Whit- ual relationships is still in the abstract at women are interesting and illustrative. bread. New York: Doubleday, 1978 (252 this stage. If the sex education is SUC- Although Ms. Nude1 offers many self- pp.; $7.95). cessful, the child will be comfortable help pointers, these are tempered by with herself and her body, in tune with Reviewed by Ren&e S. Nankin, SIECUS the firm suggestion that one should her own feelings, and sensitive to the staff. seek professional help when indicated. feelings of others. She implies that the family physician or This easy-to-read book for predomi- The book stresses that the volcanic gynecologist may be inadequate when nantly middle-class parents can be a stage of adolescence between 13 and dealing with sexual problems, and lifeline to sanity as they face the various 17 is not easy for daughter or parents. states that if antidepressant drug stages of girl-. Words and actions suddenly take on

SIECUS Report, May 1979 15 new meanings as her body and mind to verbalize her innermost feelings usually incapable of using it. For a seem to her to be developing out of about sex. And this is the moment change, in this book marriage coun- sync. Parents panic as they see their when the relationship built up over the selors David and Vera Mace offer cou- “little girl” metamorphose into a very years on a foundation of trust and ples who are doing reasonably well in individual “person” complete with her communication can be destroyed in their marriages a viable opportunity to own mind, thoughts, feelings, and val- one day by an atmosphere of distrust or do much better. The secret is in the ues. Their panic is heightened by the accusation. Teenagers need supportive techniques of communications which realization of the short time left before parents-parents who are willing to lis- the Maces have evolved during the she will be on her own. But if it is a ten to their child, to ask her how she many years of their own marriage as difficult time for the parent who must feels about a situation, to admit they well as in working together with cou- learn to let go, it is an equally difficult disagree with her, to admit they don’t ples who have come to them for guid- time for the child faced with the major know all the answers and are often ance and counseling. adolescent task of learning to break confused themselves. In the book, the couple is asked to away. The parent now has to learn all As the mother of an adolescent “contract” to follow very specific direc- over again really to hear what the child daughter, I find this book truthful and tions for a total of 24 hours spread over is saying-a role reversal with the helpful. There are pertinent reading a six-week period. The process involves daughter now speaking and trying to be suggestions and questions and answers a unique self-administered marriage understood. All of the lectures on at the ends of the chapters to reinforce potential test which sets up realistic menstruation, reproduction, physiol- the text with practical application. I goals for further growth. A series of ogy, etc., now take on different mean- would recommend this book to the dialogues is then called for, requiring ings as the young person feels the parents of daughters in any of the 20 minutes a day. The goals and con- strong sexual stirrings within her. stages from infancy to independence. tent of each are described in easy-to- These are feelings that are new and A, P understand detail, and illustrative unexpected, and no matter how examples are supplied. The authors philosophical and practical those pre- “guarantee” that if couples conscien- vious discussions may have been, they tiously follow the book’s intructions for could never totally prepare her for the six weeks, they will find that their mar- How to Have a Happy Marriage. David situations which arise each day of her riage relationship has improved. Those and Vera Mace. Nashville, Tenn.: self-realization. who have worked in marriage-enrich- Abingdon Press, 1977 (174 pp.; $6.95). The authors point out that it is at this ment and marriage-encounter pro- period in the daughter’s development Reviewed by Rabbi Bernard Kligfeld, grams know that many couples can, that the value of her previous healthy MA, DD, Temple Emanu-El, Long and will, follow and benefit from the and honest sex education makes itself Beach, New York; member, S/ECUS kind of exercises presented here with clear. As the young woman broadens Advisory Panel. clarity, understanding, and compas- her social life and finds her parents The trouble with most “self-help” sion. The book is not meant to take the listening to her, rather than to their books in the field of personal im- place of counseling; it can, however, preconceived notions of what “all to- provement is that if you really need the be extremely valuable to couples at any day’s teenagers are doing,” she will try help which the book can give, you are stage of married life. A

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