Volume 38 - Issue 23 - Thursday, April 17, 2003

Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology Rose-Hulman Scholar

The Rose Thorn Archive Student Newspaper

Spring 4-17-2003

Rose Thorn Staff Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology, [email protected]

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Recommended Citation Rose Thorn Staff, "Volume 38 - Issue 23 - Thursday, April 17, 2003" (2003). The Rose Thorn Archive. 301. https://scholar.rose-hulman.edu/rosethorn/301

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This Book is brought to you for free and open access by the Student Newspaper at Rose-Hulman Scholar. It has been accepted for inclusion in The Rose Thorn Archive by an authorized administrator of Rose-Hulman Scholar. For more information, please contact [email protected]. VOLUME 38, ISSUE 23 R O S E -HU L M A N IN S TI T UT E OF TE C H N O L OG Y TERRE HAUTE, INDIANA THURSDAY APRIL 17, 2003 Rose-Hulman senior Professor James McKinney Named Indiana ASCE's civils win state honor Civil Engineer of the Year Distinguished Rose-Hulman engineer with the Chicago Bridge Institute of Technology civil engi- & Iron Company. He also was a neering professor James McKinney former flight instructor with the has been named Civil Engineer of U.S. Air Force. the Year by the Indiana section of At Rose-Hulman, McKinney the American Society of Civil helped lead the Civil Engineering Engineers. The award was pre- Department to unprecedented sented April 3 at the section's spring enrollment growth, increased cam- conference in Lafayette. pus identity and improved aca- McKinney, a member of the demic achievements. Department Rose-Hulman faculty since 1980, statistics reveal that more than 500 was honored for his career achieve- civil engineering graduates entered ments, service to ASCE and loyal the engineering profession during support to the civil engineering pro- McKinney's tenure as chair, with fession. "Jim has always been an well over 90 percent passing the excited supporter of civil engineer- Fundamentals of Engineering pro- ing, the Indiana section of ASCE fessional certification exam on the and Rose-Hulman's role in training first try. McKinney coordinates the future engineers," stated Ali Abu- FE exam at Rose-Hulman each faras, Indiana section ASCE presi- spring. dent. "Engineers throughout McKinney supported the concept central Indiana appreciate Jim's of client-based projects for all contributions, his leadership and his Rose-Hulman civil engineering friendship. He's a first-class engi- seniors. This led to the ASCE's neer." annual senior design presentation McKinney served as Rose-Hul- competition. In 1998, Rose-Hul- Photo courtesy Ward Martin of ASCE man's Civil Engineering Depart- man's Cecil Lobo ASCE student Senior civil engineers are congratulated by Matthew Crane (Right) of the Indiana section of the American Society of Civil Engineers (ASCE) for their top honors in a state wide design competition. (From Left) Derek Hughes, Bryce Gast, ment chair from 1982 to 2001, was chapter received the Robert Ridg- David Korman, and Wendy Packard. president of the 1,300-member way Award as the nation's best ASCE Indiana section in 1987-88, chapter. Nicole Hartkemeyer Wendy Packard commented, and we all worked as a team." helped establish the Asphalt Qual- McKinney teaches courses in "This was good experience for pre- Wendy Packard added, "It was ity Assurance Program that benefits surveying, civil engineering materi- News Editor paring reports and giving presenta- interesting to see what some of our the paving industry and Indiana als, cost engineering, construction Department of Transportation, has planning and engineering economy. The Indiana section of the Ameri- tions in the working world." colleagues at other schools are The Pioneer Consulting Group working on." earned the Asphalt Pavement Asso- "Jim's passion is working with can Society of Civil Engineers originally developed a new sanitary Teams from Purdue and the Uni- ciation of Indiana Award of Merit students and teaching," states Rob- (ASCE) has honored four senior and the American Council of Engi- ert Houghtalen, current Civil Engi- Rose-Hulman civil engineering stu- treatment system for the 203-home versity of Evansville also competed. residential community in North- Projects included the redesign of a neering Companies' Public Service neering Department chair. "He dents with first place awards in their Central Indiana because the previ- fire station for the Brocton, Il Area Award, and has advised several loves working with students in the annual student design competition. state and local government agen- laboratory and the classroom. He In the last ten years, Rose students ous system in use before was dis- Fire Department, a rehabilitation charging into Wildcat Creek. The and land development study of the cies on engineering issues. He cur- has been a mentor to so many civil have won top honors in this contest current treatment system has been former Warren Elementary School rently is the R.C. Hutchins engineering graduates and faculty nine times. Distinguished Professor of Civil colleagues. Jim cares about alumni The group, consisting of Derek cited by the Indiana Department of in Terre Haute, making drainage Environmental Management as an and design improvements at the Engineering, the college's first and is proud to hear of their career Hughes, Bryce Gast, David Kor- endangered waterway. Local resi- Forest Park Golf Course in Brazil, endowed faculty position. and personal accomplishments." man, and Wendy Packard, won the A professional engineer licensed McKinney received the presti- contest for their design project that dents had expressed concern about IN, examining wastewater treatment future contamination issues with the alternatives for citizens of Bean in Indiana, McKinney earned bach- gious Sagamore of the Wabash provides alternative sanitation plans creek, which provides irrigation Blossom, IN, designing two elor's, master's and doctoral degrees for outstanding community ser- for a residential community in in civil engineering from Purdue vice and the distinguished Silver north-central Indiana. Professor of water for a golf course. replacement bridges for a corporate Group member Dave Korman client near South Bend, IN, and the University. He served as a highway Beaver Award for meritorious environmental engineering, Martin said, "Our group worked well design and construction of a steel engineer with the Indiana State volunteer service to the Boy Thomas, was the faculty advisor for Highway Commission and a field Scouts of America. the award-winning team. together, we all pulled our fair share bridge for ASCE's regional competition. Campus supports Mow Across America exclaimed. on March 19 and will continue ing in those cities are being campaign to increase the num- Ted Chan "I'm ready to mow over my until June 4 in New York. contacted to volunteer for ber of projects scheduled dur- Staff Writer first record and help clean up The crew will be raising clean-up projects scheduled in ing campus-wide America along the way. Amer- funds for Keep America Beauti- the cities that Hauter will visit. beautification day on May 3. A Rose-Hulman soccer coach ica's support in 1999 was ful, with this year’s goal at Hauter and his crew topped pack of flowers will contain 4 Brad Hauter mowed across incredible. Because concern $200,000. The Yard-Man crew the 2,500 mile mark April 15. plants and will cost $2.00. All America in 1999 to encourage for the environment is of keen will stop in several cities to The Mow Across America team proceeds will go to the Keep Americans to clean up the envi- interest to engineers and scien- help volunteers beautify parks, is now in Texas, the fifth state America Beautiful fund. ronment. He set a Guinness tists, I knew the Rose-Hulman vacant lots and playgrounds. of their cross country trek to Mow Across America t-Shirts World Record in his cross community would enthusiasti- Traveling across America at 10 raise awareness and support for will be sold in the campus country trek and he is hoping to cally support this effort," Hau- mph with a support crew of six Keep America Beautiful's Great bookstore with all proceeds break that record with his cur- ter said. members, he will pass through American Clean Up Campaign. going to Keep America Beauti- rent trip. He is riding a Yard-Man lawn cities such as Los Angeles, Las President Hulbert announced ful. Employees will be encour- "I'm back!" Hauter mower made by MTD. The Vegas, Phoenix and Albuquer- several campus projects such as aged to bring their recyclable journey began in San Francisco que. Rose-Hulman alumni liv- the adopt-a-plant fund-raising items to campus April 14-18.

ENTERTAINMENT OPINIONS SPORTS FLIPSIDE WEATHER WATCH Thursday A duo of foreign films Dr. Love strikes again Division title goes to Return of the Blackbox T-storms / Hi 63 - Lo 48 hit the streets Rose-Hulman baseball Friday Page 4 & 5 Page 6 Page 7 Page 8 Partly Cloudy / Hi 71- Lo 57 Information courtesy The Weather Channel The Rose Thorn Page 2 EVENTS Thursday, April 17, 2003

18 19 OMMUNITY C SPRING CALENDAR BREAK!

27 28 29 30 5/1 2 3 Casey Casem’s Uma Thurman’s Tim McGraw’s ARAMARK’s Lance Bass’ Birthday Birthday Birthday Cereal Elections! Birthday

4 5 6 7 8 9 10 FALL QUARTER FALL QUARTER FALL QUARTER FALL QUARTER REGISTRATION REGISTRATION REGISTRATION REGISTRATION HOUSING FORMS HOUSING FORMS DISTRIBUTED /DEPOSIT DUE

Have a great spring break! -The Thorn Staff CLASSIFIED ADVERTISEMENTS AVAILABLE NOW August. Call Robinson Rental Clean, good condition, great HOUSE FOR RENT creating a demonstration using Properties 235-9353. neighborgood, and convenient to Visual Studio that simulates the Close to ROSE - spacious and 2 bedroom, large living room campus. 2+ bath, central air, frig, process of linking callers with off- charming 1 BR duplex. Hardwood, FOR RENT and kitchen - recently range, dishwasher, washer & site volunteers. Please send large room and lots of light! S. 19th remodeled. $500/mo - utilities For MAY, SUMMER, and FALL dryer, and some furnishings. inquiries along with a brief Street. $325 + utilities. not included. All room carpeted, - Studios and 1-5 Bedroom Call 478-9286. explanation of your capabilities & except bathroom and kitchen. Apartments and Houses. Our strengths. Inquiries or for further AVAILABLE NOW Stove, frig, central air, hook-up apartments are clean and well- information please contact Call Frazier Properties - 232-4486 HELP NEEDED for washer & dryer available. maintained. We specialize in [email protected] Cozy 1 BR upper in quiet building. Part-time help needed at an Call 234-7644 if interested. affordable housing for or by phone at 244.4021. I am the Hardwood and great walk-in adorable small Montessori school responsible students. Call Frazier founder of MCF as well as a staff closets! Home Ave. $310 + electric. Properties, 232-4486. Our tenants (6 children). 9:30 -11:30 am, or 10 WANTED am -12 noon M, W, F. $6/hr. Only member of RHV. are our best reference. Volunteer to assist newly formed NOW RENTING 7 minutes from school. Follows not-for-profit organization, Call Frazier Properties - 232-4486 RHIT holidays. Please contact HOUSE FOR RENT Ministry for Clergy Families Eff. Studio 1-, 2-, and 3-bedroom x8253, or 877-3058 Now renting 3-6 bedroom (MCF), a Rose-Hulman Ventures apartments. Available May and houses for 2003-04 school year. (RHV) client. The project entails

Editorial Staff Editors-in-Chief Luke Stark & Bob Schulein Copy Editor Open News Editor Nicole Hartkemeyer The Rose Thorn Opinions Editor Brandon Hathaway “Working to keep the Rose-Hulman community informed by providing an Entertainment Editor Drew Wright Sports Editor Josh Annin accurate and dependable source for news and information.” Humor Editor Steve Hoelle Events Editor Open Photo Editor Open The Rose Thorn welcomes and encourages comments from its readers. Administrative Staff 5500 Wabash Avenue We request that all letters to the editor be less than 300 words in length. Advertising Manager Wesley Kalata Terre Haute, IN 47803 E-mail is the preferred method of communication. The editors reserve the Business Manager Open Phone: (812) 877-8255 right to edit letters for grammar, clarity, and length. All letters must contain the writer’s signature (electronic form is acceptable) and contact Advisor Richard House Fax: (812) 877-8166 phone number to confirm the letter before publication. Editors Emeritus Rachel Lukens Frank Pfeiffer ‘96 E-mail: [email protected] Webmaster Open http://www.rose-hulman.edu/thorn ALL LETTERS TO THE EDITOR MUST BE RECEIVED BY NOON ON WEDNESDAY Thorn Staff BEFORE PUBLICATION The Rose Thorn is published on Fridays Writers Chris Scribner The views expressed in the Thorn are those of the original author and do not Eva Barlow first through ninth week each quarter necessarily represent the views of the Thorn staff or Rose-Hulman community. Jacob P. Silvia Ted Chan Brandon Javella Nicholas McKinney SUBMISSIONS Kevin Spontak Events may be published in Events by any organization or individual. Information on club meetings, lectures, speeches, and athletic events, including announcements of times and locations may be submitted to Campus Calendar, in care of Dale Long, associate director of Photographer Open communications, at Box 14 or extension 8418. More detailed articles containing plans, agendas, and specific information should be Cartoonist Open submitted to the Rose Thorn. All submissions must be made by Wednesday at 5 p.m. in order to be published in the Rose Thorn on Friday. The Rose Thorn Thursday, April 17, 2003 NEWS Page 3 Residence Staff Hall for 2003 - 04 Blumberg Skinner

Andrew Getchell Bryant Eismeier Sophomore ME Sophomore EE

Jessica Frank Katie Lefler Sophomore CHEM Sophomore CHEM

BSB Speed

John Fruchte Ron Nicholls Sophomore ME Sophomore ME

David Breiding Drew Furry Junior ME Junior CE

Jenni Matheny Alex Espinosa Junior ME Junior EE

Scharp Mees

Wes Armstrong Jake Klug Sophomore CO Sophomore ME

Jon Pohlman Brianna Leahy Junior ME Sophomore ME

Deming New Hall

Adam Jarboe Sophomore ME Mike Martin Junior CO

Joe Steinocher Junior ME Marlo Manaloto Sophomore CO Martin Brenny Sophomore EE Patrick Roby Matt Johnson Sophomore CS Sophomore CO The Rose Thorn Page 4 ENTERTAINMENT Thursday, April 17, 2003

Weekend Box Office Summary This Week’s Releases: Title Weekend Total Gross 1 Anger Management 44.5m 44.5m Malibu’s Most Wanted 2 Phone Booth 7.5m 26.6m 3 What a Girl Wants 6.7m 20.4m Bulletproof Monk 4 Bringing Down the House 4.6m 117.0m 5 A Man Apart 4.4m 18.2m Holes

Stagnant beauty

traveling through 200 years of Rus- Russian Ark sian history in one shot is very intriguing; the end result is very boring. The camera spends way too Starring: Sergei Donstov much time looking over paintings. The French protagonist is very irri- Directed by: Aleksandr Sokurov tating, as is the narrator who practi- cally mumbles the entire film. In Russian with English subtitles While feeling very disappointed after watching the movie, the 96 minutes more I thought about it, the better it was. The Hermitage Museum is Bob Schulein very pretty and the fact that it looks so good in just one camera Co-Editor-in-Chief take is very impressive. It was Much like the Russian State also a very unique take on history. Hermitage Museum in which it And then I think of the story. takes place, “Russian Ark” is ele- Characters lose all motivation 15- gant, technically astounding, minutes into the movie. While booming with culture, but rather it’s kind of entertaining to see http://www.rottentomatoes.com dull in the end. The film is com- Catherine II and Anastasia, it gets “Russian Ark” is a visual tour-de-force, spanning 200 years of Russian history in one single, uninterupted shot. It’s prised of an unprecedented 87 very boring when the narrator just too bad the plot and pace are subpar. minute uninterrupted shot, lead- doesn’t interact with any of the ing to one of the most original characters. Upon seeing the Per- this scene carries on far too long and 1930s Russian Regal attire. movie for the camera work alone. cinematic experiences in years. sian ambassador in a ceremony, and doesn’t build to anything. The camera work is very, very, In the end, I feel very mixed “Russian Ark” follows a French the narrator even comments on I was shocked that though the very impressive. The camera is con- about this movie. I learned a bit aristocrat as he journeys through how boring the proceeding is. movie goes through 200 years of stantly moving throughout the entire about Russian history, but because the Hermitage Museum, meeting An elaborate dance scene, com- Russian history, we only see rich movie and there is virtually no shak- of the lack of coherent narration I historical Russian figures from plete with live orchestra, carries people. This is probably due to ing. While slow and plotting most of wasn’t able to understand the the past 200 years. He has some- out the final third of the movie. keeping historically accurate the time, there were a few fast track- importance of the figures on how been lost in time and the We see the French man hitting on accounts of the tenants of the ing shots that kept the pace flowing. screen. The movie was simply too beginning sets up a search for various women and the narrator museum. While all the costumes Compositions look very good for the beautiful. It really needed more identity story. That story is walks around as aristocrats dance. are amazingly detailed and color- most part: characters’ heads are variety. If you are planning a trip to soonly dropped, however, and the While technically astounding, ful, they all look the same to the never cut off and paintings are the Heritage Museum any time movie spends the rest of the time especially considering this was untrained eye. I don’t think I’m framed very well. Though the soon, check out the movie and save admiring ornate paintings. staged in real time 60 minutes in the minority not being able to movie may be boring, fans of cine- some cash. See it for the camera- I have to admit the prospect of after the camera started rolling, tell the difference between 1820s matography will need to see this work, but don’t expect any plot.

Ran Study break DVD of the week The Rose Thorn’s weekly guide to classic and modern films worthy of your precious time.

Wellspring Home the bard’s work twice in his career: control of sets, had to struggle for 10 ment and stay on the screen for too Video the 1957 adaptation of “Macbeth,” years to find funding for “Ran.” The long. The pace is rather slow and dubbed “The Throne of Blood,” and filmmaking empire he had built over there are many references to tradi- $20.99 at the 1985 samurai-themed “King his 40-year career was beginning to tional Japanese Noh plays that may Deepdiscountdvd.com Lear,” called “Ran.” crumble. bore an American audience. There is “Ran” literally translates in to En- The downfall of the Ichimonji also a great deal of overacting, as was glish as “chaos,” and that is just what clan is told in a very epic fashion. usual in Noh plays. Rated R this movie contains. After a brutal Old families that were conquered by Wellspring has done a very fine reign as warlord, Hidetora Ichimonji Hidetora have surviving members job of restoring “Ran” to its rightful Directed by: Akira decides to hand over his kingdom to that have taken the brothers’ new beauty. Colors are deep, and while Kurosawa his three sons. One son proclaims his aquisition as a chance to take their the image is a little soft in some plac- father’s desicision as preposterous revenge. As the brothers plot es, it is much better than the early Fox Starring: Tatsuya and is banished. The other two sons against each other, other families Lorber release of the title. Nakadai, Akira take control. add confusion. Included supplements are 2 inter- Terao, and Mieko Like father, like sons, so peace The most remarkable character in esting commentaries. One of the Harada. does not last for long. The eldest son, the movie is Lady Kaede, played by commentators admits to not being a Taro, is weary of the troops still loyal Mieko Harada. She is married to fan of “Ran” and points out the mov- to his father so he stages a battle to get Taro, but uses every chance she can ies flaws as it goes along. The other Supplements: New rid of them. The following battle is to trick him into doing something commentary is much more informa- 1.88:1 transfer, Bob Schulein one of the best ever staged in cinemat- that will hurt the family. After Taro tive and speaks of editing techniques remixed 5.1 sound, Co-Editor-in-Chief ic history. Only grim music is heard is shot down in battle, Kaede begins and gives information on the charac- two commentaries, as images of maidens commiting sui- an affair with the second brother, ters. Trailers, a restoration documen- restoration docu- Akira Kurosawa is known as the cide and troops getting slaughtered Lord Jiro. She tricks him in a simi- tary, and a production guide round mentary. most Western of the great Japanese are seen onscreen. No sound is heard lar fashion, begging for him to kill out the special features. directors. This is evident in the until a single gunshot pierces Taro. his real wife. “Ran” is undoubtedly Kurosawa’s The bottom line: An stylings of his 1954 “Seven Samu- It’s incredible to note that Kurosa- Being such a long epic, it does last great film. He would only go on epic samurai adapta- rai” and repeated use of lone char- wa was in his mid-70s and nearly have some flaws. Kurosawa reverted to make three more before dying of a tion of “King Lear,” acters rebelling against society. blind while filming “Ran.” Many to a style very akin to painting near stroke in 1998. “Ran” is a fitting Kurosawa paints his His Western influences also parallels can be drawn between the end of his career. While this leads summary of a remarkable career in spread in to literature. A long time Hidetora and Kurosawa. Kurosawa, to some very beautiful images, some cinema, and now it can be enjoyed as final great picture. Shakespeare fan, Kurosawa drew on long known for his “emperor-like” of these images contain little move- Kurosawa intended. The Rose Thorn Thursday, April 17, 2003 ENTERTAINMENT Page 5 Album of the week

solely on the shoulders of Por- great job illus- Drew Wright cupine Tree and Anathema at trating this facet Entertainment Editor the time. From there, the band of the music, as continued to evolve, adding Renske’s Nick Katatonia surprise after surprise with Drake-inspired each new album, until it vocals glide ef- Viva Emptiness seemed whatever creative pool fortlessly over the duo was tapping into had fi- waves of thick Peaceville Records nally dried up when 2001’s rhythm guitar mildly disappointing “Last Fair and warm folds “Viva Emptiness” presents Deal Gone Down” was released of lush orches- one of the world’s greatest to mixed reactions. tration. modern progressive rock Thankfully, the undeniable Where the al- acts at their eerie best. band rebounded with an album bum truly ex- to rival any of those in the cels, however, For the second straight week, genre, Grammy award winning is when the band behind our album of Opeth works included. On “Vi- Nyström’s jan- the week hails from the Nordic va Emptiness,” the band drasti- gly guitar is al- musical wonderland of Sweden cally broadens all aspects of lowed to rise and her seemingly endless ros- their art, incorporating the su- above the ter of quality extreme acts. perior musicianship of their rhythm section, However, far removed from the past with the unmatched song- introducing a relentless abrasiveness of Car- writing of their older and wiser new, sharp per- nal Forge’s “The More You years. spective on the Suffer,” Katatonia’s latest mas- Musically, the album is a material being terpiece, appropriately titled near perfect amalgamation of presented. “Viva Emptiness,” presents “Brave Murder Day’s” pension Lyrically, you one of the world’s greatest for muted aggression and “Last will be hard modern progressive rock acts at Fair...’s” spacey pop songs. pressed to find their eerie best. Add the possibility of throwing darker or more Garnering massive critical three guitars, two vocalists, beautiful imagery than is pre- make David Bazaan of Pedro Also new and praise for 1997’s depressing and four programmers into the sented in “Viva Emptiness.” the Lion seem brimming with masterpiece, “Brave Murder mix, and what results is a Even the artwork, which con- confidence, the band has con- noteworthy: Day,” Katatonia’s master- heavily layered product incapa- sists of ashen, washed out im- structed a challenging and Laptop – The Old Me Vs. The New You minds, and only 2 constant ble of being properly appreciat- ages of lonely streetlamps, emotionally draining album Cex – Being Ridden that is well worth the effort re- members, Anders Nyström and ed with a single casual listen (a children, and urban wastelands Soilwork – Figure Number Five Jonas Renkse, were catapulted lesson which I humbly learned contribute to the chilling expe- quired to fully appreciate this Via Tania – Under A Different into the spotlight as saviors of after initially dismissing the rience that is a Katatonia dreary concept album sure to be Sky the dark progressive rock record). Tracks such as “Will I record. Writing with such bit- an instant classic. The Few – The Few movement that was resting Arrive” and “Evidence” do a ing self-deprecation that would Icarus - Six Soviet Misfits

WMHD 90.7 FM BALLYHOO “The Monkey” Top 30 April 14, 2003 PIZZA KING

# Artist Recording 1 Ozma Spending Time On The Borderline 232-3423 2 Elefant Sunlight Makes Me Paranoid 3 Via Tania Under A Different Sky 4 DJ Krush The Message At The Depth 5 Cursive The Ugly Organ 6 Boy Sets Fire Tomorrow Come Today Rose-Hulman Special 7 Sorry About Dresden Let It Rest 8 Aphex Twin 26 Mixes For Cash 9 Kamikaze Hearts Kamikaze Hearts 10 The White Stripes Elephant Large 1 Item Pizza 11 Astronaut Wife Flying Saucer 12 Death By Stereo Into The Valley Of Death Everyday!! 13 Ester Drang Infinite Keys 14 Earlimart Everyone Down Here 15 Even in Blackouts Myths And Imaginary Magicians Only 16 Flashlight Brown My Degeneration 17 Relient K Two Lefts Don't Make A Right… But Three Do 18 Evolution Control Comm. Plagiarythm Nation 19 North of America Brothers, Sisters $5.00 20 The Chris Danforths Outside Of Outer Space 21 Laptop The Old Me Vs. The New You 22 Seville Take Me Home 23 Everything but the Girl Like The Deserts Miss The Rain EXPIRES 4-30-03 24 The Faint Danse Macabre Remixes Price is for on campus delivery only. 25 Arab Strap Monday At The Hug And Pint 26 Count the Stars Never Be Taken Alive 27 Cex Being Ridden price does not include sales tax 28 Beans Tomorrow Right Now 29 The Stratford 4 Love And Distortion 30 Kaada Thank You For Giving Me Your Please visit us on the web at Valuable Time www.ballyhoo.ws The Rose Thorn Page 6 OPINIONS Thursday, April 17, 2003 Spring break and the French connection

that his country is ready to play thing they did that actually should “I tell ball now that the fighting is made sense. not be done. One aspect of the Metric sys- left out. you The French are demonstrat- tem that our buddy Napoleon Instead ing the same response as pretty tried to pull off did not actually of sitting what to much every other country right fly was a metric week- ten in Intro now: surprise that the U.S. days, but still a two day week- to Aero- think!” Military was so successful in end. The man was a military space the field, surprise that the Ira- genius, but could not quite and Brandon Hathaway qis were so welcoming of for- grasp the concept of a day off. looking cracks corn and I don’t care eign liberators, and I guess that is why he did not out the disappointment that the nay- quite achieve his goal of Euro- window You know, the metric system saying was so far from accu- pean domination. He just got and was developed during the Na- rate. North Korea and Syria burnt out. Also, he was afraid think- poleonic Era in France so that have freaked out pretty good, of cats. ing, "It's they could build on their na- too. Anyway, the point I am try- nice out Although we all learned that tionalism and have units of The funny part is watching ing to make is that weekends there," next week I will be out- we could do six in the winter measure that are not from En- the snooty French try to apolo- are great. Anyone who says side in nice weather looking up quarter, it's like arguing with gland. This is otherwise de- at the sky and say, "I wonder someone about Unity . It can pretty much all of serves a swift what the drag coefficient on be done, but not comfortably, French cultural This is pretty much all of French cul- kick in the that jet is." Then someone will and it is best for all parties not policy: "Not to be tural policy: “Not to be English.” pants. make fun of me. to do it frequently. English." Those Not only And that will not bother me, Now that we are all heading silly French are that, but this because I will be on vacation, out for some outside time, ex- having an interesting time gize in order to get political in- Friday is especially good. By and so will all of you. Regard- cept for the CS folks, I would right now, though. fluence back while saving as coincidence, it is also Good less of where you will be, you like to express my joy that we Jacques Chirac, President of much face as they can. This is Friday, but that's not the only will not have school, and that get a week off with five more France, is trying to make his another one of those instances reason it is especially good, al- is good. As much as we all to go when most other colleges country look like less of a jack- in history when their national- though that one is pretty hard love math, science and engi- are getting ready to end their ass nation, after picking the ism and desire to be not British to beat. The matter I was going neering, there is only so many year and embark on summer. I losing side in the whole Iraqi kind of backfired on them. The to mention was Spring Break is weeks that one can handle at a think I might feel better if it business. Chirac has decided Metric system was the one starting, but Easter weekend time. were a metric week. Kevin Spontak - Dr. Love Lewinsky giving advice? dependent. You will have to than guys and are more likely By Ryann Acton mean, do I have to list names? Kevin Spontak employ different methods of to care. The Daily Athenaeum But I do not, I repeat DO NOT, Staff Writer healing based on how far you I mean, if my drunken friend (West Virginia U.) claim to be an expert on the got into the relationship. To wanted to talk about his feel- 04/16/2003 opposite sex, and thus host my For this week's article I am get over a girl you've been dat- ings right now, that would be U-Wire own reality dating show on getting help from a good ing for a week, get a little cool, but I would feel helpless. Fox. I claim complete stupid- friend of mine. I did get some tipsy. This is simple, efficient "I don't know what, um, this If you needed dating advice, ity on the subject. good questions from curious and most important, a much thought is going to com- who would you go to? Your Lewinsky has yet to self- Rose students, but I decided to needed break from reality. plete." See, that doesn't make best friend? Your mom who proclaim herself as a dating put those questions off till And then you end with fun sense. He's my bud, but I don't has been through three expert. But I think it is fair to next week for good reason. effects like your friends writ- really want to get all touchy, divorces? Your dad who hasn't say she thinks of herself as My friend recently started dating newspaper articles about feely with him unless I'm slept in the same bed twice one, considering she is going ing a girl. This girl was dating your love life. "Spontak is a mildly inebriated also. since 1983? Your very pricey on national TV spewing out someone else at the same time. dirty bitch." See, isn't that Which of course is a condi- therapist? How about Monica advice like it is her J.O.B. Oh This is perfectly fine; see rule fun? tion I would never be in since I Lewinsky? wait, it is her J.O.B.! number one. Anyways, she For a girl you've been dating am not 21 as of yet. "You Yes, Lewinsky now has her I can only imagine how she decided to get serious with for a couple of months, you should be mildly inebriated. own dating show on Fox called will guide the desperate one of the other boys she was have to change up your plans a No wait, you're not of legal "Mr. Personality," debuting woman who actually went the dating. There is no shadiness little bit. Wait for the next age. Stupid Minors." Doesn't April 21. In the show, the lengths of going on TV to find in this, but at the that just make woman gets to choose from 20 a date with the help of Lewin- same time, it still you feel loved? masked men. She must pick a sky. sucks to not be If you can save someone a little And I know this man based on his inner beauty. Maybe Lewinsky will take the one picked. pain by taking it on yourself, you might not be a Apparently, Hollywood her shopping to find just the Anyways, he's good solution, but thinks men actually possess right outfit that will allow for drunk, and yes, are truly a king among men. nothing gets you inner beauty. I only know (but easy access. Or possibly they he is 21, so he is over the last one I digress) the inner stupidity of will take the masked men to a going to help me this week. time you have a break in your like the next one. hot college boys whose knowl- cigar shop and see how their Rule number 2: "Women are schedule, like a weekend, and I have been down in the edge of hair gel is vast and choices in cigars size up. bitches." Not my words, I go out and party. Now I know dumps before and while it is knowledge of a clitoris, well, Lewinsky could definitely put swear. I like girls, they're fun. different people party different shady, rebound relationships small. Lewinsky's role as the her two cents in there. And they are so much more ways, so you have to know help. Just be careful because woman's confidant is to give I wonder if the Clintons will attractive than guys. But still, how you party. A trip to Indy you don't want to hurt some- dating advice. cuddle on the couch together every girl at some point or to go to a dance club might be one like you just got hurt. All Yes, ladies and gentlemen, after a long day of work and another will be a bitch. Just just the thing you need. And kidding aside, if you can save Fox is confident in Lewin- watch their new favorite TV like at some point every guy, dancing with pretty girls is someone a little pain by taking sky's ability to give great dat- show, "Mr. Personality." They no matter how nice, will be a always a good thing. Or it on yourself, you are truly a ing advice. Her track record could giggle and reminisce on jackass. So in dating, it is maybe just staying around the king among men. But as it is, has been so successful that the days when they were a hot, always important to remember Haute with some good friends I need to go get some water they feel she is qualified to new couple looking for love. this so that you don't get hurt. will do the trick for you. No for my friend so he is not too give an impressionable woman If TV executives think fea- By the way, specific girl who matter how you get down, you terribly hung over for our 8:00 advice over which masked man turing a show with Lewinsky my friend likes, he wants you need to relax, so go to it. AM lab tomorrow, so I leave possesses the most inner is a good idea, reality TV has to know he doesn't hate you, For a girl you've been dating you with this: remember how beauty. hit a new low, if at all possi- he's just drunk and he's a little a long time and have said the it feels right now to be lonely, Apparently, allowing the ble. Reality TV has run its upset. He does want to stay "L" word to, things change depressed and totally vulnera- president to ruin your cute course. You can win millions, friends with you, but like I drastically. Unfortunately, ble and do everything in your navy blue Gap dress with a love and even a record con- said, it sucks not to be the one alcohol won't solve this prob- power to help others not feel nice shot was a good idea. And tract on reality TV. And now picked. lem for you. Getting drunk is that way. Be these people apparently, playing dirty with reality TV has added the dat- The question for this week: only a temporary fix and it friends, enemies or lovers, the married president via a ing advice of Miss Monica "I was dating a girl and things won't make you forget your we've all been there and a lit- cigar in the Oval Office was Lewinsky to one of the many didn't work out for whatever feelings. I know it's rough, but tle bit of kindness towards another brilliant plan. benefits of those who go on reason. How do I get over you have to talk to someone someone in a bad situation Given, I have done things these shows and embarrass her?" about it. I suggest a female goes a long way. that have been less than bril- themselves in front of the This is all very much time friend. Girls listen a lot better liant in my dating career. I nation. Who wants to read a U-Wire article? Write for the Thorn. [email protected] The Rose Thorn Thursday, April 17, 2003 SPORTS Page 7 Rose-Hulman claims division title with twinbill sweep over DePauw Rose-Hulman Institute of Sophomore Shawn with one run and one great team effort. We have used Technology claimed the South- Smith (Wabash/ RBI to lead the of- a lot of players this year and ern Collegiate Athletic Confer- Northfield) then fense. guys have been ready when ence Eastern Division Baseball reached on a fielding Rose-Hulman called upon. Many of our play- Championship with a 5-4 extra- error to score Moore sophomore Brad ers have been waiting for an op- inning victory over DePauw with the third run of Jones (Jefferson- portunity to shine, and now that University after winning the the inning. ville) picked up the it’s their turn, they have been opener of a twinbill 4-1 on Sun- The eighth-inning pitching victory with great,” said Jenkins. day afternoon. rally started with a 1 2/3 innings of Rose-Hulman opened the Sophomore Scott Tourville double by Keefer and scoreless relief. twinbill with a 4-1 victory over (Westerville, Ohio/North) lifted an intentional walk to “I’m really pleased the Tigers. Smith tossed a com- a sacrifice fly to DePauw left junior Cort Severns for our young men. plete-game four-hitter with eight fielder John Younger to score se- (Manito, Ill./Midwest We really didn’t strikeouts and just one walk to nior Ryan Keefer (Fort Wayne/ Central). With one know what we would improve to 4-1 on the season. Northrop) with the division-win- out, Moore singled to have this year, and we Windmiller and Smith had two ning run and secure the double- shortstop Zach Harris received little respect hits each, while Severns drove header sweep. to load the bases and from the league in the home two runs with a single to The dramatic contest featured set the stage for Tour- preseason poll,” said lead the Engineer offense in the DePauw scoring once in the sev- ville’s sacrifice fly. Jenkins. opener. enth inning to knot the score at “I wanted to get a Rose-Hulman was Rose-Hulman earned one of 4-4 and keep the game alive. In hit, but I knew that I picked to finish third two No. 1 seeds for the SCAC the bottom of the seventh, Rose- just needed to get in the SCAC Eastern Tournament to be held April 24- Hulman loaded the bases with Ryan (Keefer) Division in the league 27 at Art Nehf Field. A total of one out before a ground out and home. I waited for a coaches poll. The six schools will qualify for the a strikeout ended the threat. pitch to drive, and I Photo Courtesy Rose-Hulman Engineers now stand double-elimination tournament, Rose-Hulman jumped out to a was able to hit it deep at 11-1 in league play with the winner earning an auto- 4-3 lead with three fifth-inning enough to score the Junior Matt Moore and 16-11 overall matic bid to the 2003 NCAA Di- runs. Tourville provided the key run,” said Tourville. with four Eastern Di- vision III Baseball Tournament. hit, a two-run double with the Moore finished and a pair of intentional walks. vision games remain- “We have accomplished a lot bases loaded, to score Keefer with four hits in the nightcap and Keefer added a pair of hits after ing beginning Friday at Centre this season, but I truly believe and junior Adam Windmiller scored twice, while Tourville entering in the fifth inning. For College. that our best baseball is still (Roachdale/North Putnam). was 2-3 with four runs batted in DePauw, Ryan Sipe finished 3-3 “I’m most proud that we had a ahead of us,” said Jenkins.

Florida State report suggests misconduct

By Joe Lemire & Melissa Sil- NCAA before joining the FSU then-Florida State president Tal- cerned, the matter is an internal how the university handled its verman staff. Minnix then called Inder- bot “Sandy” D’Alemberte who one. responsibilities,” she said. Cavalier Daily (U. Virginia) hees into his office the following called for the task force that in- “At the university, we have an “We’re looking at it as an insti- 04/15/2003 day. Inderhees said in a Dec. 4, vestigated allegations against inspector general who has been tution and our responsibilities as 2002, sworn statement that, in McPherson for gambling and commissioned to give a report of a university first.” (U-WIRE) CHARLOTTES- his meeting with Minnix, he reit- against the VILLE, Va. - A joint report re- erated the allegations he made to athletic de- leased last week by three Florida Urbanic. partment for a law enforcement agencies re- Inderhees told investigators possible cov- ported potential misdeeds by key that Minnix wanted to contact er-up. That Florida State University athletic McPherson’s bookie “to get this criminal in- officials. The criminal investiga- resolved as quickly and as soon vestigation re- tion into the FSU athletic depart- as possible,” and that Minnix sulted in two ment was initiated following said “it was something that we felony book- felony charges of grand theft, couldn’t leak out to the newspa- making charg- petit theft and forgery made pers or the television because of es -- against against former Florida State the high status that Adrian had.” Inderhees and quarterback Adrian McPherson. The report also contains a former FSU The report raised new questions sworn interview with Minnix student Derek over the course of action taken conducted on Dec. 2. In that in- Delach -- and by officials in the FSU athletic terview, Minnix acknowledged one misde- department. speaking with “a football man- meanor gam- Hey you... Yeah, you, the one The investigation, entitled ager who was complaining that bling charge “Operation Coin Toss,” pro- Adrian owed him some money.” against thinking about “Spring Break”... duced evidence that Florida Minnix then explained that “if I McPherson. State officials -- specifically wrote it down that it might be The scope of Andy Urbanic, associate athletic subject to somebody reading it the investiga- director for football, and Bob somewhere along the way, quite tion has thus Minnix, associate athletic direc- frankly.” far been rele- tor for compliance -- not only Under Florida’s Sunshine gated to the had knowledge of McPherson’s Law, the official records of all criminal and Well, to help alleged gambling and credit card state employees are open to the university lev- fraud six months before the public. els. There still quarterback’s arrest, but also Though Minnix decided is no public you reduce made an effort to conceal the al- against keeping official records, word over legations from the media and the he did bring the matter to the at- whether the public. tention of FSU Athletic Director NCAA will your costs, get a pizza at Jeffery Inderhees, an FSU stu- Dave Hart and football coach take any puni- dent and football equipment Bobby Bowden. tive action. manager now facing felony When questioned by investi- “I’m not an incredible price! bookmaking charges, told inves- gators Jan. 14, 2003, Bowden aware of any tigators in a sworn statement that admitted that he too had heard NCAA in- he visited Urbanic’s office in the allegations of gambling well volvement,” late May or early June of 2002 in advance of the recent report. Steffens said. and presented evidence that When asked about his prior “I don’t be- McPherson had purchased shoes knowledge of the situation, lieve we’ve with Inderhees’ girlfriend’s Bowden replied in the affirma- had any indi- Extra Large 1234 WABASH AVE. One Large credit card. He also suggested tive, saying, “Yes, I did pick up cation from One-Topping One-Topping that McPherson had placed bets rumors of that ... in May or the NCAA that Store Hours... on sporting events -- a direct vi- June.” we’re under Mon-Wed: 9am - 1am olation of NCAA bylaw 10.3, Neither Bowden nor Minnix investigation.” Y

Thurs-Sat: 9am - 2am Y

L Sunday: 12pm - 12am prohibiting sports wagering. Ur- could be reached for further Steffens 99 L 99

N Campus

banic dismissed these claims in comment. Urbanic declined to stressed that, N Only Campus front of Inderhees, according to make a statement and instead di- as far as the O Only O Inderhees’ testimony, but did re- rected The Cavalier Daily to conduct of 7 5 port them to Minnix, a career in- Florida State general counsel Florida State Limited Delivery Area - Coupon Required Limited Delivery Area - Coupon Required ORIGINAL or THIN CRUST where available ORIGINAL or THIN CRUST where available EXPIRES - N/A. Not valid with any other offer. 232-PAPA EXPIRES - N/A. Not valid with any other offer. vestigator who spent 20 years as Betty Steffens. athletic offi- Valid at participating locations. Customer pays Valid at participating locations. Customer pays head of compliance for the According to Steffens, it was cials is con- all applicable sales tax. Additional toppings all applicable sales tax. Additional toppings Volume 38, Issue 23 “Proudly entertaining and annoying the Rose-Hulman community since some time before now.” Thursday, April 17, 2003 Top Ten Reasons to Skip Class Friday Wacky Prof Quotes 10 It’ll be the last thing they expect! “I like the big ones. The big ones are better.” 9 Hertz would like for you to have the day off. --Dr. Brackin, talking about springs, we think 8 Still hung over from the Avril Lavigne concert last night. 7 What? I thought it was Good Friday! Class isn’t good. Class is ungood. “Raise your pants! It's too late to save your 6 Hey, half my classes are cancelled anyway, what’s the point? shoes!” 5 Look, I’m jet-lagged from this savings time thing, I need a day off. --Dr. Eccles 4 Friday also happens to be the last day to drop a class. You don’t really have to show up for that one test if you don’t want to. “The next thing as far as texture for ladies is Kit- 3 If that Arizona camera crew catches you on film, it’ll blow your cover. Kat.” 2 It’s your last chance to hang out in Speed before it turns into a oven. --Dr. McLean, ...innuendo? 1 You’ve only got 13 hours to stake your claim on the ‘Bash. “Are you going to pick a little butt or a big butt?” Sonka’s Irish Pub to move into White Chapel --Dr. Stienstra, not making medium butts an Sonka’s Irish Pub (14th and Wabash) Institute’s endowment while giving stu- option has been a traditional Rose-Hulman bar dents, faculty, and staff access to their for well over twenty years - now it is favorite bar without having to leave “Hmm, maybe I should have chosen different let- coming to campus. Negotiations are campus. Between-class morale among ters. Anyway, study T and A tonight.” underway to lease the White Chapel to seniors polled in the Commons is at an Sonka’s in an effort to replenish the all-time high. --Dr. Leader, on variable names ICP to attend Rose-Hulman “Sometimes I like to go down and grab people.” It has been confirmed that the Insane math and science background. They --Dr. Evans, explaining how to get an A in stats Clown Posse has been accepted into the cite the beautiful campus as a potential freshman class of 2003-04. Violent J gathering site and the lack of distrac- “Where is the sexy clamp?” and Shaggy 2 Dope, controversial tions in downtown Terre Haute, quite --Dr. Duree, on holding down lasers frontmen for ICP, have not yet com- unlike the glitz of southwest Detroit, to pleted high school but are working be their primary motivating factors for Send your Prof Quotes to: closely with tutors to strengthen their selecting Rose-Hulman. [email protected] New degree program introduced at Rose R173 4 teh Fl1p51d3, neWb! Dr. Art Western, Dean of Faculty, Department Heads, outside consult- We’re still in need of comic because it’s a bunch of recy- reports that a new degree program will ants, and an acting CIO who will be strippers, satirists, ranters, or cled inside jokes with a stu- be available starting in the academic provided from an outside search just plain ole people that pid editor (all true), you’re a year 2005/06. The program, tenta- agency. The Board of Trustees fully think they’re funny. If you’re perfect candidate to help us tively titled Environmental Biophysics supports both the new program and the curious about helping out the out! Management Software Engineering, Institute’s vision to attract more and Flipside, email us with ques- If you’re afraid all your will be a joint effort between nearly better students by offering cutting edge tions at: insolent friends will make every department on campus under the niche degree programs. flipside@rose-hul- fun of you because you direction of a committee of current man.edu aren’t funny, don’t worry! Of course, you will never You can write for the Flip- be under any obligation to side and remain completely submit material, we just anonymous to protect your want enough people to toss ego and your academic us occasional stuff, because standing. we do actually run out of Please, help us continue to ideas. The current Flipside entertain and annoy the staff is just a few guys that Rose-Hulman community. can only come up with so much material every week, and we need your help! If you hate the Flipside

This Week in the News This Week in History This Week in the BLACK BOX!!! El Departamento de la Seguridad de la Pa- 983 A.D. - It’s 10.75 square inches of newsprint painted tria lowers the terror alert status to ‘yellow,’ Otto II, second ruler of the Holy Roman black, baby. Huzzah! meaning any terrorists you find are slightly Empire dies, succeeded by his son, Otto III. A higher level than you. You might be able to Roman mob forces Otto III to flee in 1001, kill them solo, but it will be rough. and he dies a year later trying to regain his headquarters in Rome.

The Little Line o’ Litigious Lard: The content of The Flipside is intended to be purely humorous, and it does not represent the opinions of The Rose Thorn or Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology. It probably doesn’t represent anybody’s opinions, ‘cause it’s all supposed to be a joke, okay? If you’re offended, go blow it out your oversensitive arse! All material is copyright of it’s respective owner.