Elsewhere T H E u c 5 D Berke.. y Students Boycott Merchant BERKELEY - UC Berkeley students have organized a boycott against a local mer­ chant, Taek Kim, who is accused of macing an African­ American student during a vernal argument that escalated into a physical confrontation. UCSANDIEGO THURSDAY, APRIL 1, 1993 VOLUME 79, ISSUE 2 The student, Berkeley Junior MruQuette Jones, said that Kim, a Korean-American, used ethnic slurs against him during the argument and that the merchant Students Pay had shown hostility toward African-American customers in the past. The students said that Tribute to the boycott is designed to show that "threats, harassment and all other forms of disrespect will no longer be tolerated." Revelle Junior UCD Faces PaInful tRAGEDY: Emilio Cruz, who died Cuts for '93-'94 in a boating accident March 21, was DA VIS - The UC Davis remembered by family and friends administration announced By Sheryl Wolcott preliminary cuts in the 1993- Senior Staff Writer 1994 budget last month. Decreas ing financial resources When Emilio Cruz was in high school, he and two Simi Valley High School classmates set out may lead to the elimination of to build a model suspension bridge. They started the Women 's Resource Center, with cardboard. Dan McDowell/Guardian a 30 percent cut in the budget of A member of the Sigma Chi fraternity places a white rose on a makeshift altar during the "But cardboard wasn 't enough for him, we the student health center and ceremony yesterday. Two hundred students attended the emotional memorial. had to use wood. Then wood wasn't enough, he cuts in the athletic budget that said we had to use steel," Stephanie Wong told may lead to the elimination of on you and he would not let you be there alone." and teachers, how important they are. six out of 10 intercollegiate the solemn audience that gathered yesterday to One after another, fri ends ofCruz spokeofhis The memorial included tributes by Cruz's pay tribute to Cruz, the Revelle junior who was athletic programs and postpone loyalty and dedication, his zeal for life and his fraternity, Sigma Chi, and the Pi Beta Phi soror­ killed in a boating accident over spring break. the attempt to upgrade the genuineconcem for others. A crowdof200 stood ity, whose members placed flowers in memory "Emilio drew up blueprints and all these school 's athletic programs to in a semicircle around Stonehenge for the hour­ of Cruz on an altar while singing the songs of the formulas I didn 't understand," recalled Wong, Division I status. long, late afternoon memorial attended by his fraternity and sorority. who had been Cruz's classmate since junior mother, Marion Cruz, and his longtime girl­ "Emilio set lots of goals. He wanted to be the high. She and their other partner soon lost interest friend, Christine Leonard. best he could, then rush headlong into something RalnWalhe.~ and went outside. When they returned, Cruz had "He [wasn 't just my only son, he] was my else," his mother said. "I wanted him to stop and UCLA Students constructed a six-foot bridge. favorite son, and 1 was his favorite mother, feel the texture of life .... This is what UCSD LOS ANGELES - With the Cruz, who later earned an A- average as an despite the competition from his friends' moth­ allowed him to do. Thank you for filling out his abundance of wet weather this AMES major and aspired to earn advanced de­ ers," Cruz said. life." winter, many students living in grees in engineering, tested the model bridge by Cruz's mother read parts of a letter her son Cruz's mother also thanked the fraternity for UCLA's Sunset Village have standing on it, and it held up. "But that wasn't had written to her last year, in which he expressed creating a scholarship fund in his name, saying been plagued by flooded and enough. He said it had to be able to hold all three his love and admiration. that the pursuit of knowledge was of utmost moldy rooms. Students of us," Wong said. "If it were not for the love you showed, my importance to Cruz. complain that housing authori­ So, holding hands, the three students stood to­ son, if it were not forthis letter - and it is not the Donations to the Emilio Cruz Memorial Fund ties ignored their complaints getheron Cruz's bridge, which withstood the test. onlyone- [yourdeath] would be insupportable can be sent care of Steve Batutis, Rancho Santa about the leaks and refused "That bridge symbolizes what Emilio was," for us," she said, urging those in attendence to Fe Thrift & Loan Association, 251 N. El Camino their repeated requests to move Wong said. "He was stable, he would not break take the time to teU friends and relations, coaches Real, Encinitas, CA 92024. to different rooms. University housing officials disagree, saying that they offered the students alternative housing and A.S. Candidates Final Co-op Agreement reimbursement for damage to personal possessions caused by Kick Off Spring the rain. Still Proves Elusive Campaigns By Karen Cheng eral Counsel Gary Morrison, who Associate News Editor counseled Vice Chancellor of Un­ Inside ELECTION: Three The Associated Students, dergraduateAffairsJoseph Watson Graduate Student Association to disestablish the University Cen­ students in the running (GSA), the co-ops and the univer­ ter Board CUCB). for the presidency sity administration still have yet to According to Burke, Morrison come to an agreement over the has been unresponsive to changes By Elaine Camuso original Memorandum of Under­ suggested by the co-ops and has Staff Writer candidates, decide the tone and di­ standingthatwassignedonJan.31. tried to make major revisions to The spring Associated Students rection of this election," he said. According to Groundwork parts of the memorandum to which general election campaign officially "The worst campaign is the one Books co-op member Chloe Burke, the parties have already agreed. began this Monday when the can­ that tries to smear another candi­ there are four different drafts of the "The AS. and the GSA are just didates met with Elections Man­ date. That's not the way to win." Memorandum of Understanding puppets of the regents. They don't ager Beth Gesson and the elections Presidential candidates include being circulated currently among get their authority from the stu­ committee to overview the elec­ Revelle Senior Senator and Col­ the parties: the original draft, a draft dents - at least that is what tion bylaws and campaigning pro­ lege Council Vice Chair D.A with proposed AS. changes, one Morrison claims. We could run into cedures. Bartolotta, Third College Council with proposed co-op changes, and more problems with [Morrison]," DIGABLE After a trying year during which . Chair James Hill and A.S. Vice the administration's version. she said . HIATUS: A hot new rap act students saw the co-ops teeter on President Administrative Randolph Both the AS. and representa­ AS. President Mike Holmes combines jazz and hip-hop in the brink of eviction, the Univer­ Siwabessy. tives from the co-ops say there are said that while the co-ops may think a fresh new way. It! sity Center Board (UCB) be Bartolotta is running indepen­ still key issues to be addressed be­ the AS. and the GSA are puppets disestablished and fees rise by more dent of any slate and said he plans fore any agreement can be com­ of the regents, they are working SPORTS: Tennis sliced than $1 ,000, the election is ex­ to run on a "Jeny Brown [-type] pleted. toward autonomy. past Williams College on pected to focus on how such prob­ shoestring budget." Burke cited the five-year space "[The AS. and the GSA] are Monday afternoon. • lems can be effectively addressed. Bartolotta said that he views agreements that do not include guar­ campus units. I don't think we're Elections will be held April 5-7 saving the co-ops, limiting fee in­ anteed renewal options, liability in­ puppets, because we're fighting on at the Price Center and in front of creases and developing a cohesive surance and the co-ops' non-profit different issues than the university. Index the Main Gym. plan for A.S. autonomy that ac­ status as the main issues to be ad­ We are not completely autonomous After a brief introduction by counts for the interests of the entire dressed. from the university, even though UCSD BRIEFS ...... 2 Gesson, current A.S. President student body as the major issues Also at issue is the we arc working on it," he said A.S. MEETING NOTES ...... 2 Mike Holmes offered his advice to that the next AS. president will administration's replacement of An 8IIleIldment concerning p0s­ OPINION ...... 4 the candidates. face. UniversityGencral Counsel Joanna session of assets if • co-op dis­ OIATUS ...... 01 "'t is my opinion that you, as See A.S., Page 3 Beam with University DeputyGcn- See COOPS, Page 3 CLASSIFIEDS ...... 5 SPORTS ...... 8 Thlll'sday, Aprill, 1993 The UCSD Guardian NEWS 3 2 NEWS The UCSD CuardWa Thunday. April 1. 1993 Candidates infl uence policy. A. S.: "]' d like to get students to under­ Recycle Program Adds 25 Campus Bins Meel School To Conduct begin their campaigns stand that if we can unite, we are ETCETERA. • • more likely to succeed," he said. ENVIRONMENT: ContInued from page 1 Si wabessy is running on the "Stu­ Co-op helps UCSD Women's Health Stu_ Bartolotta also cited a lack of dent Action Now" slate. which in­ CALVIN & HOBBES by Bill Watterson communication between the A.S. cludes candidates for all executive raise $40,000 for effort REIEARCII: UCSD named as a 'Vanguard Clinical and the college councils as a reason positions and all commissioner p0- By ErIc Schmidt Center'in nationwide effort; will receive $12 million ~U.O? iE':>, 1 \'IEE-D " ~w..T 0t4 ~ ~ U4~ for the failure of the current A.S. sitions except CommissionerofPro­ Senior Staff Writer IlOO'( 011 PAI~TING T\£OR'( sPat~ KIR ~"i 0.4 leadership . gramming. The experience of run­ ., ...,. WalDott for nine to 14 years. AM!) 1t(IINlOOE . <:H£R 1\IEitE ? A joint effort between the "I'm trying to enfranchise ning on a slate is unifying, accord­ Senior StJJIf ~ As a "Vanguard Oinical Cen­ UCSD students and administra­ disencorporated students who have ing to Siwabessy, who ran on the UCSD School of Medicine was ter," UCSD will receive $12.2 mil­ tors and the California Department been slowly left out of the A.S. same slate as current A.S. President tWDed Tuesday as one of J6cenrers lion over 12 years and will recruit of Conservation has raised over process," he said. Mike Holmes last year. in the country that will participate in 3,490 women to be studied over $40,000 for the expansion of Hill says he is basing his cam­ "This year. becau.sewehad worked an unprcc:edcntcd $62S million. IS­ nine years. By 1995, 29 more cen­ UCSD's recycling program. paign on direct communication with together, we had similar goals and year study of women's health sp0n­ ters will be added to the study , bring­ The Department of Conserva­ students. "I don 't expect to spend a similar plans, and we were able to sored by the Na­ ing the tOlai num­ tion gave UCSD $22,395, match­ whole lot of money putting my name address the issues more effectively." tional Institutes of Mn...... ber of institutions ing funds given by the UCSD on everything around campus. I'm Student Action Now is distri but­ Health (NIH). involved to 4S. graduating senior class. The funds ••'11 collect will more into talking to people," he said. ing a 6-10 page outline of its com­ The study is Because of the will be used to set up 25 three·bin (q iN: "''f lif~ IIq\ beEN - ,,,+ f'-HICl;, t&ot« of He plans to rely on his network mon objectives to students as part EriC Schmidt/Guardian expected to usher Ilk.., be .. of Latino population ~IR'i of II fqS(i~qH"'G SEll.i~~ It I~ 'IN'! of ~OIMI \ql.i\'l~ ""'pi olts , bu\iM~'~. ,.. \loon o"t! pus and to expand collection of $22,395 check from the California Department of Conservation. tile BIOSt Important San Diego) for introduc­ must be involved if students are to they're addressing," he said. clinical trial and observational study, look at diseases in men," said Rob­ of students and the administration, the Recycle Co-op will implement ing legislation for a "minimum WIll will target major causes of ert Langer, an assistant professor of a sentiment echoed by University and coordinate the glass pick-up, content" of recycled materials law death among women, such as heart family and preventative medicine Another pointof contention con­ Center Director Jim Carruthers. according to Recycle Co-op mem­ and for the idea to use glass in disease, osteoporosis and cancer, who will direct the UCSD study. CO-OPS: The cerns the veto power of the GSA "The university and students put ber Meg Gordan. California road beds. and will investigate methods to en­ Langer called the selection of crisis may never end over the A.S. Holmes contends that their heads together to write the Despite the grant, problems Killea representative and UCSD courage healthy behavior. UCSD "a great achievement for San since the GSA onl y represents 2,000 grant," Carruthers said. persist with recycling on campus, alumnus Mike Nelson congratu­ "The work of this project is over­ Diego, for the School of Medicine Continued from page 1 students it doesn't make any sense Assistant Vice Chancellor for according to Hurst. The company lated students for obtaining the due. This initiative is a first step and for our Latino community." He solves is another substantive change to allow it veto poweroverthe 15,000 Physical Plant Jack Hug credited responsible for removing recycled grant money and lauded Killea for toward equality for women's health added that "the database we'll col­ which has also become problem­ students of the A.S. Hurst for obtaining the funds. "We glass on campus has not made any focusing on recycling. research, and it needs to be fol­ lect will likely be one of the most atic. Dubb disagreed however, say­ provided the moral support for pick-ups recently. "If you look through all the lowed-up by ensuring the place of important in the history of the NIH GSA Vice President External ing that the main reason for GSA [Hurst]. He was the catalyst, and The resulting piles of glass sur­ gloom and despair, the mosttelling women's health in the mainstream and will carry our research here in Steve Dubb said that in the event of veto power is to prevent political we worked together," Hug said. rounding glass recycling bins im­ thing is that the administration, the ofbiomedical research," Health and Epidemiology well into the 21 st BRIEFLY ••• the dissolution of a co-op, assets termination of the agreement. According to Hug, most of the pede the success of recycling, Hurst staff and the students all worked Human Services Secretary Donna century." would go to another co-op, the stu­ HIn any association, you want to bins will be installed within the said. He added that while most together to accomplish this," Shalala said. The system of 16 vanguard cen­ dent government, or another cam­ have protection for the minority nextthree months. "We have over- bins on campus accept mixed-color Nelson said. A total of 160,000 postmeno­ ters will span 15 states and will also Researcher Awarded For Ceo-Mathematics pus student organization. group. If one body says yes and one pausal women aged 50 to 79 will include the UC Davis School of Dr . Ute C. Herzfeld, an assistant research cated at the San Diego Veteran's Affairs Medical Center "We are making a strong com­ says no, there's more than objective participate in the nationwide study Medicine. geomathematician/project scientist at Scripps Institu­ and is Clinical director of the Scripps McDonald Alcohol mitment to UCSD," Dubb said. criteriagoingon-there'salsopoliti­ A p p A R E L z o N E tion of Oceanography, was the recipient of the intema­ and Drug Program. He is recognized for his outstanding According to Holmes, if the co­ cal motivation going on ," Dubb said. tional Association for Mathematical Geology's (iAMG) work on the genetics of alcoholism. ops leave the UCSD campus, they Another round of negotiations President's Prize for 1992. She was honored for her Mandeville Exhibits Ceramics can take all oftheir assets with them. between the four parties is sched­ Outlet C[o "original and outstanding contribution to the application "What we students ask in retum uled to begin next Monday. A.S. MEETING NOTES of mathematics to the geological sciences." "Ceramic Variations: Three Installations" is on dis­ Herzfeld came to Scripps in 1988 as a Feodor Lynen play atthe Mandeville Gallery through April 25. The show is just enough money to start new "I have faith in the co-ops and the Fellow of the Alexander von Humboldt Foundation in presents the work of Tre Arenz, Rachel Clawson and services. If these retail operations administration, but if the three parties Co-op N~ In his executive report, President Mike Holmes Bonn, Germany, Her research interests include Berry Matthews and demonstrates the three very differ· leave students without services, they don 't sign, the co-ops and the admin­ addressed the cp issue, saying that there are three drafts of the Memoran­ geomathematics, marine geology and geophysics, dum of Understanding now Circulating: the administration's version, the A.S. ent approaches to ceramic artwork taken by each artist. should be replaced by new services," istration go to court and the students 50%-90% bathymetry and satellite altimetry over ice sheets. Council's version and a cp draft. "It is my belief that many members of these he said. lose in the end," Holmes said. negotiating parties, as well as the university community, are very confused Shake..,... and History of about the specifics of each draft,' Holmes wrote, adding that his communica­ Psychiatry Professor Named AmerIca AbrIdged In New Plays tion with the graduate students indicated "that they do not quite understand Your Future Looks Bright Distinguished R_rcher The Reduced Shakespeare Company's high-speed BE LOW RETAIL PRICES what has been proposed: The negotiators are hoping to meet April 10 to UCSD Psychiatry Professor Marc Schuckit was named resolve the issues, but Holmes said that there is a chance the student groups delivery of "The Complete Works of Shakespeare How About Your Teeth? the 1993 Distinguished Researcher by the Research (Abridged), " will be staged at Mandeville Auditorium on may meet before then. Society on Alcoholism, the major scientifIC organization Thursday, April 15 at 8 p.m. On the next night, April 16, Whiten Your Teeth Before Your Summer Tan in the United States dedicated to understanding alcohol they will give their performance of a new show, "The FKlIItI.. ao.d- An A.S. proposal which consists of basic ideas for a fa­ EVERY DAY cilities board to replace the recently disestablished UCB was approved by the dependency. Schuckit will be presented with the award Complete History of America.· nckets for each event are Teeth Bleaching at the society's annual meeting in San AntoniO, Texas on $13 and $15 for general admission and $10 and $13 Graduate Student Association, Holmes reported. The proposed board would June 22. for students, and may be purchased at the UCSD Price Student Special $199.00 Some name brands: focus on establishing its own autonomy and autonomy for the A.S. and GSA. 10- 'We don't know that autonomy is possible without the involvement of a facili· Schuckit directs the Alcohol Research Center Center Box OffICe or from TicketMaster outlets. ties board, " Holmes said. He also expressed concern overthe GSA's approval Dr. Tom Wiggin • Tweeds • Generra of this "basic sketch· for a board. "I proposed these pages of conceptual ideas 12750 Cannel Country Rd. Suite 209 so that we would have a framework to start working with. To approve them as San Diego, CA 92130 • Express • Victoria's Secret they are and without research seems absurd and dangerous, • he wrote in his report. "This may not even be viable, but it is something to start from,· he 755-7805 & many more added. NEWS WRITERS MEETING ''''. ' '

~ Pt.... a- Holmes distributed a letter which he, the chairs of the " .. ·l 'r. ,~ '" 4 P.M. TODAY at the Guardian ~'''14 '' " , 4, ' ~ ~ ...... staff association and Chancellor Atkinson sent to all staff and faculty urging O,.TIITRY them to contribute money to a new scholarship program for low· and middle­ I h~ yo~ all noticed ~ the time has c':'a"g~ from 6 p.m: to 4 p.m. So don't come at 6 p.m. Oleay? We will income students, The Academic Senate Committee for Undergraduate Scho~ be dlscussmg some very unpo~t ~, mcluding story assignments, deadlines, paychecks and our amual trip arships and Honors will select the scholarship recipients. to Bennuda. Any and all prospective wnters are encountged to corne by. Call Francisco DeVries 1t 5.34-5226 or 534-6580 for more information. Our offICe is above the GenemI Store Co-op in the Old Student Center. - ComplIed EI ..... Camuso, Staff Writer by ,

FRANCISCO DeVRIES, News Editor DIllIN CONIULTMT: James Collier ON SERVICE Be REPAIR OF VW's and AUDI's IUUITItATOItS: Michl Croft. Tara EolI, NaIll., Enln. Speed F.ml. Jennlfllr BEN FREUND, Features Editor Hilt. Dominic Lobbl • • Alan Lundlren. AdrIano MuIlOZ. KMJe Roe. AI SIIOI1C GORDON HURD, Associate Hiatus Editor Dlll8l1IRI: Joel AmoIO, Wliion Cheun&, Clncly Lin, MlrCUllObbIa. Chrlltopher Master Mechanics ROGER KUO, Graphics Editor Lock JI. 1DWS ~_ McDOWELL, Photo Editor I'HOTOIIIAPMIRI: DavId Cho. Sk*t Oeb, Paul M8c1

TPte UCSD GuMtIM Ia ..-,od Iwic:e • _ 81 tile lJnIwnItr aI~. Sen DioIO. Content_ 01883. v___ 1IMin ..-tile ~ WIte aI tile edIIoIIaI _, end .,. not -.tIy _ altIIe UC IoeRI alII...... tile ASUCSO. nor hi _ .. au.dMJamII. Instead of TrI .....ng the Fat, Regellts Keep Raising Fees When Governor Pete Wilson slashed state funding to the Univer­ sity of California by $138 million in January, it was clear that higher fees would be an immediate result. But in a Jan. 14 editorial, we wrote, "To meet the budget shortfall, [UC President Jack] Peltason and the regents should examine reducing the university bureaucracy. UCSD GUARDIAN ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT APR ILl, 1 9 9 3 This means cutting all executive benefits, downsizing administra­ • • tive departments and eliminating any n~less administrative posi­ tions." After the Feb. 18 meeting of the Board of Regents, where Peltason introduced a proposal that would raise fees by $440 while cuning faculty salaries, we echoed our previous call to cut adminis­ trative waste. During an interview with the Guardian editorial board, Peltason hinted at the need for trimming needless administrative fat. Though he offered nothing specific, by discussing the subject, Peltason at least gave students and faculty some glimmer of hope. We weren't the only ones who realize that the university could solve many of its budget woes simply by reducing administrative S;o You PONT LIICf THE • ~yS' 'III THE AI waste. UC Berkeley Physics Professor Emeritus Charles Schwartz MI£.ITARY GUT ONI.Y Ot.l1JfE Wf£(E~~" 11>fA has estimated that roughly half of the $523,508,000 spent on '? administration is "excess fat that can be trimmed." Such wisdom has apparently fallen upon deaf ears at the Office of the President. On March 19, the regents voted to approve a $995 fee hike, meaning students will be paying $4,019 per year for the THESE DAYS, IT'S AIJIJ TALK 1993-94 academic year. Besides this fee hike, which will account for 33 percent of the budgetary shortfall, the regents approved a five percent cut in faculty salaries, another roadblock to attracting and AND No SUBSTANCE keeping quality professors. COMMENTARY: Oprah, Sally Jessie, Geraldo and company have turned the While the regents did see fit to cut $35 million from the Office of modem the President and the nine UC campuses, these cuts were never talk show into a shameless representation of America's lascivious ideals specified. Therefore, it is unclear whether the university has done all Civilization and culture have should not be discriminated against because she is 8000 it can do to share the pain. Conventional wisdom, however, would always been assaulted and plagued. and leave it at that? While there may be a small group of suggest that it has not. Rome was crushed by barbarians, people who think that such women should be required to Fee hikes may be a necessary evil, especially with a governor and Europe during the Middle Ages fix their lx>obs, who cares? legislature that do not appear to value higher education, but a $995 was ravaged by the Black Death, Whether it is Donahue, Oprah, Sally, Montel or Jane increase is ludicrous. With every fee hike (and there have been too and early America was often Whatsherface, every talk show is invariably a clash of many to count, as oflate), the University of California is out of reach plagued by smallpox. All of these bumper sticker peddlers whose outrage is banal and evils have passed away for the most stupid and appears like intellectual gangrene - putrid for a rapidly growing number of qualified students. Limited access part. But none ofthem compare to and disgusting to look at. Ultimately, the biggest yahoos to the university means limited opportunities for the future. In their MATT that all-pervasive evil and rotting stand up and yell slogans until the talk show leader gains efforts to keep the university afloat, the regents are sacrificing two influence: the modem talk show, control for a convenient break. What is surprising is not of its most valuable assets - students and faculty. Such a course of Talk shows are reflections of that racist debates prompt chairs to be thrown at Geraldo action is not only dangerous, but foolhardy as well. It bodes poorly HOBIJmf what modem America has decided but that the excuse of racism is needed to throw chairs at for the future of the UC system and for the future of California, as to do with the fruits of liberty, Geraldo. well. namely to throw Talk shows are the inevitable result But then again, we've been saying that for a long time. them at one' s neighbors. I am ceaselssly of the radical egalitarianism of the six­ amazed by the low level of moronic and ties. Talk shows wallow in the same Guzman IElekl!a Records Latest Happenings in Russia lascivious programming that goes into moral outrage and avalanche of con­ the modem talk show. Lesbian sex clubs, flicting rights as the children of sixties. Endanger yeftsin, Democracy daughters who marry their stepfathers. That is the conflict of the rights of the JEFF NIE S EL teenage renegades, white supremacists, idiotic to spread idiocy and the rights of HI,tTUS EDITOR Russian President Boris Yeltsin either dodged a bullet or received stripper moms and the list goes on ad John Q. Public to try to ignore these a temporary stay of execution last week, depending upon on your inftnirum, ad nauseum. vennin. The '60s proclaimed the em an­ With the success of its single "Rebirth of Slick point of view. After narrowly surviving an impeachment vote, It is not surprising that so many dif- Talk shows ... cipation of the individual from every (Cool Like Dat)," Digable Planets, which makes its Yeltsin's grasp on the reins of power seems even more tenuous than ferent and unique individuals live in reflections of what moral insight and cultural restraint and San Diegodebuttonightin two shows at 8 and 11 p.m. ever before. Consequently, the growth of democracy in the largest America. What is alanning, however, is counseled an unparalleled hedonism and a vulgar egoism. at the Pub, has been hyped as the hottest rap act this of the former Soviet republics seems to be on the same shaky ground the almost morbid curiosity that has modern AmerIca Therefore, we should not be sur­ year. The band's affmity for jazz comes through on its that Yeltsin now fmds himself. attached itself to these subjects. Talk ' has decided to do shows are not only interested in their prised that "00 your own thing, man" album Reachin' (A New Refutation of Time and For that reason, the upcoming Vancouver summit between subjects, but they want to essentially with the fruits of has become "Look what I have done Yeltsin and President Clinton takes on an added importance. It is in Space), which includes samples from jazz greats like parade shamelessly every deviant form liberty, ...... , to with my mom, man." Freedom without the United States' best interest to support Yeltsin and insure that he of behavior exploitable in our society. internal restraint is what is held for Art Blakey and Sonny RoUins. The New York-based stays in power. The alternative is a return to hard-liner rule and the Unfortunately we all know that none throw thalli at public display on every talk show. It is trio has also adopted the entire jazz attitude, using uncertainty of the Cold War era. That reason alone is enough democracy debased to satisfy man's of these issues are explored with anyone'. neighbors. I words like "cat" and "spiddyock" in its song titles. incentive for the United States to support Yeltsin and his reforms at depth. The level of ratiocination in one lowest appetites. Dlgab'e Planets, the hot new rap act any cost. of Montel's audiences would not mea­ am ceasele•• 1y Talk shows are not alone however. Digable Planets has received acclaim comparing its success with that Clinton will no doubt offer Yeltsin and Russia economic aid, and sure a tremor on an intellectual Richter ...... bythelow We no longer expect to be uplifted by that combines jazz and hlphop In of 1992 Grarnmy winners Arrested Development. In a recent phone art, precisely because the same prin­ this will certainly help matters. The approximately $1 billion in aid scale. The few times I have caught parts level of moronic interview, vocalist Doodlebug-members are all named after insects­ that will be proposed is a drop in the bucket for the United States and of these programs I have been amazed ciple that spawned the talk show nur­ tures the diseased art world. "Shock the fresh new ways, will be perfor.. llng spoke about the band's success, the influence ofliterature and philosophy will offer a moderate amount of security for Yeltsin' s troubled rule. that people in the audience and on the ~ stage could have such indignant or con­ ... bourgeoisie at all costs" is the message and the meaning behind the band name and album title. But the important thing to realize is that simply throwing buckets of PI'OIP'annIng that cerned expressions and then come up of modern art. We are all victims of tonight at the Pub See DIGABLE, page H4 money at Russia will not solve their many problems. with the most idiotic comments. It does .,..Intothe society and true freedom only comes The crucial variable holding Russia back is not the man in charge, look like they are thinking. modern talk show. with the most deviant behavior legiti­ but the system in place. In order to truly help Russia, Clinton and the How many times can we have big mated by the mantra of self-expression. United States must make an effort to assist the country's transition breasted women on different talk shows before someone Talk shows are the most basic expression of a vitiating to a free market economy. Economic aid will suffice in the short run, realizes that something a little bit more disingenuous is idea whose hideous time has come. but any long term stability can only be brought about by a concerted going on than the concern for those mammary-glandu­ Discussions on talk shows never focus on what human effort and dedication to revising the Russian system. larly challenged. Can'f we just say that Sherry Stacks See TALK, Page 6 FHLSETTOS THERIER REY~W: 112 TEHMINRL BLISS: 04 HIATUS 2 The UCSD Guardian Thursday, April L, 1993 HIATUS 3 The UC 0 Guardian Thursday, Apl·a], ]993

Tickets range from $19 to $24. lIIHTIH UP COM I N G Info: 235-8025. REVIEWS Patio Playhouse Theatre: T 0 DRY 10 Rubin directs Stephen Sondheim's "A Little Night Mu­ Jack Nichol on stars in Hoffa, sic." The play continues through Danny Devito's fi lm about the April 18. Perfonnances are Fri­ Teamster union leader. The film day and Saturday at 8 p.m. and will be shown in the Price Cen­ Reefers will be playing in a The 1993 Gothic Festival will Cajon. Tickets are $21 .50 and Sunday at 2 p.m. Ticket are $12. ter Theatre at and I 1:30 6:30,9 reggae conceIt in th e O 'Brien feature performances by gothic $23.50. Info: 278-TIXS. Info: 746-6669. Falsettos p.m. Tickets are $2, $ 1 in ad­ Pavilion on the Del Mar Fair­ rockers The Empire Hid­ vance. Info: 534-6467. groundS at 4 p.m. Advance tick­ eous, The Shroud, This The Swiss film Anna GOldin: ets are$15, $20 day of the show. Ascention and The Proph­ Jbe La.t Wdch will be shown GRLLERIES Musical makes its West Coast The mosh pit will be raging Info: 278-TIXS. etess. The show starts at 9:30 in Mandeville Auditorium at 8 when Suicidal Tendencies p.m. at Soil. Tickets are $6. Info: p.m. as part of the International Grove Gallery: "Ceramic Fig­ Premiere at the Old Globe Theatre and its spin-off Infectious Films by Pratibha Parmar, 698-8276. Style Film Festival. Tickets for ures of Ocumicho: In Conjunc­ Grooves play at the Starlight Ayoka Chenzira and tudents are $4 and pa ses for the tion With NCECA '93." The ex­ Bowl in Balboa Park at 7:30 Saundra Sharp will be A contrabass recital will feature series are $25. Info: 534-6467. hibit will be on display through MICHAEL SCHWARTZ p.m. Tickets are $2050 and screened at Cafe Cinema in ac­ South American soloist Milo April 17. Gallery hours are Tues­ SENIOR STAFF WRITER $21.50. Info: 278-TIXS. cord withan exhibit on display at Masciadri at 8 p.m. in Erickson day through Friday 10 to 5 p.m. and Saturday 10 to 2 p.m. Admis­ !though it's hard to believe these days, there is no law the Museum of Photographic Hall. Info: 534-5404. NEONESORY The hot rap band Digable Arts. The screening takes place sion is free. Info: 534-2021. requiring musicals to be based on a classic novel or set Planets will feature its acces­ Harvey SoIlberger directs a in Europe. They don't have to showcase massive at 8 p.m. and tickets for students The local band Prairie Fire A sible jazz-inflected grooves in sonor concert at 8 p.m. in Museum of Photographic are $8. Info: 236-9574. plays country western music in a units of scenery, and they don', even need a huge cast. Mandeville Auditorium. Tickets twoshow atthe Pubat8 and II free show in the Sports Arena Arts: " I Dream a World: Por­ And, believe it or not, they can still be incredibly entertain­ are $6 for students. Info: 534- p.m. Tickets are $11. Info: 278- The Peabody Trio will per­ Tower Records parking lot at traits of Black Women Who ing, as "Falsettos," the hit Broadway musical developed by 4637. TIXS. form in Mandeville Auditorium noon. Changed America" feature por­ William Finn and lames Lapine, proves in its West Coast traits of 75 influential African­ debut at the Old Globe Theatre. at 8 p.m. Tickets are $18. Info: 534-4090. American women and i on dis­ Origi nally developed as two separate one-act plays at fRIORV C)n~oin~ play until April 28. The museum Playwrights Horizons in New York, this new version splices MONDRY is open daily from 10 a.m. to 5 together both pieces into a fast and funny musical for the '90s. Martin ScheCter, author of Faith No More plays at The hard rock band Firehouse p.m. Admission is $3. Info: 239- Although "Falsettos" is set in 1979 and 1981 , it is a story for Two Halves ofNew Haven, will Rosarito Beach at 2 p.m. Info: plays with and 5262. the '90s. Marvin, a family man with a wife and one child, read from his book at 7:30 p.m. 278-TIXS. King Mother THERTER MIs·Led at the Belly Up Tav­ abandons his marriage to move in with another man. His wife, at the Blue Door Bookstore in San Diego Repertory The· Museum of Contemporary ern in Solana Beach at 9 p.m. Trina, goes into psychotherapy with her husband's hrink, ' Hillcrest. Info: 298-8610. atre: " TheDybbuk,"aplaybased Art: "La Frontera{The Border: Info: 278-TIXS. . Mendel, who proceeds to fall in love with her. Add the two SUN DRY on trad itional lewish folklore by Art about the Mexico/United lesbians next door, plus a ton of neuroses and you have the SRTURDAY The La Joia Symphony S. Ansky and directed by Todd States Border Experience" fea­ foundation of the musical. Orchestra and Chorus play TU [ S DRY Salovey, continues through April tures the work of more than 35 The tory examines love in the '90s, and the many barriers Shabba Ranks, Michael selections by Bach at 3 p.m. in lOin the Lyceum Space Theatre artists in paiming, culpture, pho­ to functional relationships. Although there is a loose, linear Rose, Chaka Demus & Mandeville Auditorium. Tick­ Folk si nger Joan Baez plays in Horton Plaza. Perfonnances are tography, installation and video. narrat i ve, director Lapine tries to create a cabaret atmosphere Pliers, Foundation, Riche ets range from $5 to $10. Info: with John Wesley Harding Tuesday through Saturday at 8 The exhibit continues through with songs and skits floating by. The bright red, intimate set Stevens and the Cardiff 534-4637. at 7:30 p.m. in Theatre East in EI p.m. and Sunday at 2 and 7 p.m . May 22. Info: 454-3541. works well as pieces comically roll on and off the stage. However, the music is nothing to write home about. It is the standard synthesizer fare, and the badly over-miked Broadway voices are annoying. The cast of "Falsettos" presents Issues relevant to the '90s even thouBh it's set in the '70s. Nevertheless, some numbers really shine. The show opens with a song entitled "Four Jew in a Room Bitching," which has a powerful and beautiful voice and, thankfully, does not is not overly cute. Finishing off the actor roll-call are Barbara ends with a parting of the Red Sea. fall victim to the hbright-lights-big-vibrato" complex of most Marineau and Jessica Molaskey. "I'm Breaking Down" is an old-fashioned show-stopper, a male leads. Indeed, we know very little of any of the chamcters. So vaudeville-inspired ode to hysteria involving a symbolically Despite his awkward moniker (Whizzer), Peter Reardon much time is spent on the singing of witty lyrics and the Freudian banana. Freud, Carl lung and Dr. Ruth Westheimer looks like he stepped off the cover of GQ , ideally cast to play exploring of stylized staging that very little emotion is invested join in for the finale. thehunkofall hunks. CaroleeCarmello, the wife trying to hold in the characters themselves. Other songs focus on the miracles of ludaism, various her life together, is sublime. Although occasionally glib in its portrayal of some serious forms of love and the catering and canceling of a bar mitzvah. Also, true kudos go to Adam Heller as the shrink. A and ugly topics, "Falsettos" provides an entertaining look at And one cannot forgetthe title song, "March ohhe Falsettos," wonderfully quirky portrayal of the good doctor makes every­ people attempting to overcome life's little tragedies. The a glow-in-the-dark extravaganza. one in the aud ience want to hop up and down, and sing "I'm broad and fantastic strokes painted across the stage offer The cast is glowing. As Marvin, the central (albeit i1l­ gonna be alright for the rest of my life!" everyone something with which to identify. defined) lead, Gregg Edelman delivers an almost too-likable Credit is also due to 1ason, the chess-loving posterchild for "Falsettos" plays through April 25 atthe Old Globe Theatre performance, but his vocal performance makes up for his broken homes, played by Ramzi Khalaf. He is charming in Balboa Park. Forticket information and performance times, acting. A Tony A ward nominee for "City ofAngels," Edelman through his nerdiness, and most importantly, stays on key and call 239-2255. sptart nmpanv APRIL 15 • THURSDAY 8PM • MANDEVilLE AUD. UCSD BOX OFFICE • 534·6467

457·JAVA (5282) 8750 Genesee Costa Verde Center (near Boo/war) • Monday·Thursday 6 am·11 pm • Friday 6 am·midnight • Saturday 7:30 am·midnight r------,• Sunday 8 am· I I pm I 00 I I $1 OFF I I I I Any Cappuccino, I I Mocha, or I ~ ALL NarH~~~ m~e ~ebuceb ~4ak£1;peare 0.10. I Frosted Mocha I ,~_ ~ APRIL 16· FRIDAY • 8PM • MANDEVILLE AUD. • I I ------0 .. (1

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ALBUM Do you need an on·campus Nolary Public? If so. ENJOY THE AMERICAN ORIVING. Ofdsmabile DIGABLE: Band makes philosophy accessible call 587·7911 . (1 /4·613) Regency Madel 77. Greal conCItlons. Call 45(). S057 aher 8 p.m. (3129·411) ContInI..d from PIP HI is going to be bener because it is However, the band does not try to RE~EIJ Apply now for '93·94 Director positions at the A.S. Internship Oltice. Six paid positions avail· t IBM/COMP - 366116 MHz. 40 MB HD. 2 MB The band began as a result of actually going to be more 'live,'" astound listeners with its philosophi­ lASSIFIEDS EGA Wlndaws, ~. ablell (Public Relations. Nalional. Oevalapment, ~=:- RAM. Mant. software. Doodlebug's friendship with But­ Doodlebug said. cal expertise - its intention is to San Diego. elc .... ) Drop by ASIO 10 picf< up an HP DeSkjet 500 Printer. $800. 481-0288. (3J29. appIicalian:second ftaar P. C. Roam 2.306. Dead­ 411) terfly and Ladybug. He met Lady­ "I've been hearing a lot about make the philosophers sound as cool line to apply is Friday. April 16. 534-4689. (3129· Classified adveltising is sold in IS-word increments. The rate per 15 words is $1 for bug in Philadelphia and Butterfly in the 'sophomore jinx' but I'm not as the jazz artists it eulogizes. Even 411) PAUL McCARTNEY Tickets - 4 tix field level. students (for personal use only), $3 for faculty and staff, and $4 for others. Payment in SI20/0b0 - ScoIt. 558·8175. (3J29.4I8) New York,and aftermoving to New going to worry about it. It's impor­ though images of inner-city vio­ Apply now for Summer and Fall internships in San Olegall Applicalian DeaCline Is Friday. April advance is required; therefore, ads must be mailed with a check (made payable to 1be Soundblaster sound card lor your IBM. Comes York, the three began to create mu­ tant that we make the music we lence usually associated with rap 23. Drap by ASIO for mare Info .. or come ta fhe with manuals and software. Call Scott - 558- sic together. Bunerfly and Doodle­ know how to make and don't sell cannot be found on Reachin', the General Info Night on April 13 in Gallely B. P.C. UCSD Guardian) or presented in person. Deadlines are 3 p.m. Thursday for Monday's 8175. (3129-411) ASIO is an the 2nd ncor P.C., Room 2.306. 53-4· bug shared a love for jazz (together ourselves shon. What's important band feels it hasn't lost touch with 4689. (3129-415) issue, and 3 p.m. Monday for Thursday's issue.1be Guardian reserves the right to refuse SURFBOARDS FOR SALE. Three 6'1'. One the two have amassed a collection is that we make music from our its urban roots. any advertising including but not limited to companionship ads. For more information 8'4'. Musf sen . Olrty low prices. Starving student. of nearly 2,000 jazz albums) and heart. If it doesn't sell well, we "There's a lot of people on the Intemalional House is a greal cross-whural Mv· Boards perfect lor learning on during Spring ing opportunity I Applications for 199319<4 avlil· ca1l534-5416.Mailingaddress:UCSDGuardian,Attn:Classijieds,9500GilmanDrive, Quarter. Contact Jud at 622-0945. (3J29.4I5) Ladybug, who was raised in Rio de already have other plans." streets who can understand our phi- . able althe Flhh College Office of ResJdence Ufe. Jr.. Sr. or Grad slanding required. Due 4121 . (31 0316, La Jol/a, CA 92093-0316. Actual address: Student Center A, top floor. Radio Shack EC·4034 graph. caJculatorwlpoiar. Janeiro, was heavily influenced by The confidence in their abil i ty to losophy, too. There are some kids I 29-4/15) USEO ONCE! Wlmanuall $60. Jane 571· 7118. Brazilian jazz and samba. The trio pursue other avenues stems from know in my neighborhood who Ta1ninal Blss (3129·411) eventually saved enough money to the fact that both Butterfly and would be into it if they could read FAST FUNDRAISER. $1.000 in 1 week. Greeks. Here's same p8I1·lime posi1ians where you can Need part·time work? Need luition assistance clubs. anyone. No RiSk. 800·655·6935 Ext. SO. earn income boIh while in San Diego County as plus more? The Naval Reserves is for you. Call SPEAKERS: Brand new. 3·way. 125 watt/each. record Reachi,,' . Doodlebugadmit­ Doodlebug started college and these books," Doodlebug said. "We (3129,416). welt as wheo you're back in your hame town. Call Klmberty. 477-0104 for 467·5660. (411) WANTED Never used. MUST SElLiI $100 for both. Dave Never Alone 558-4628. (4/1·415) ted that despite his confidence in the would not mind returning to school wanted to show that every kid in the CONNERS CONSULTING. 457·3494. (3129-418) Diel Magic - lose up 10 30 pounds in 30 days. Seeking TM meditators to form on campus Plane Tickels - 418 evening S.D. 10 Oakland and band's talent, he was a bit surprised in \he future. Doodlebug artended ghetto doesn't have to be the same Most dedicated bands have apparent in the songs "Voices In Herbal 100% nalural. Doctor recommended Research AssIx. for Pharmacology. A B.S. in SERVICES organization. Call Michael 276' 1314. Leave 4112 Oakland 10 S.D. $40 each o.b.o. Call 792· 100% guaranleed. (619) 581 ·7231 . (3J29.411) PmrmacoIogy. Biology or Chern. req·d. Must haII8 Message. (318·415) by the success of the single. Howard University for two years, thing - every kid doesn't have to enough trouble scheduling work and The Mist" and "What's Words 8182. Ask for Nancy. (411·415) eel a.jure expo & I'eIl8 wor1Save $$$1 Buy your books al Revelle Bargain P po9tion. Setect T9r\1lOflIrieS 492·9995. (JI29.4Il ) call 587·7911 . (114-613) Resident AdVisors wanled lor INTERNATIONAL Doodlebug downplayed the com­ Mlcrosoh Word 5.1 and Excel 4.0 for Macinlosh. Books. Monday·Friday. 9:00·5:00. (3129-411) HOUSE 1993·94! Career Services Job '5566. parisons being made between his at the University of Massachusetts. time to just be yourself. gigs, but three of the four members The intelligent lyrics address Unopened. Not academic edltions. 459·8469. Olspalcher FT/PT , Del Mar. Type 30 WPM wi PASSPORT PICTURES! Only $5.95. While you Applicalions due 419. (3129-415) New poIlcy.ffect.. 11W ...... n!Women ·s·sanl· (411) band and Arrested Development. Doodlebug studied broadcast pro­ 'The language is street but we're of local hard rock band Terminal political issues as well as the frus­ accuracy. Good spelling & phone Skills. $5.251 wail. Xeroxes and more. Near SI. Germain·s. lary praducts' no longer available for free or lor hr. + bonus. Bilinguat $6. Select Temporaries. 452·9949. (1 119-613) Free Movie Tickelsl Men needed 10 participate in duction at Howard and said that his mixing in ideas from people who Bliss have an additional task to i nte­ trations and confrontations of life. coins in campus restrooms . If you object. lei Genuine lealher bomber jackel. large. brown. Whiletherearesimilarities, Doodle­ 492·9995. (3/29-411) doctoral research project on sexual~y . Two free them know by sending leller or clean. unused excetlent condition. $170.00 o.b.o.; HP 42S sci· have probably never been in the grate intotheir lives: going to school Valce, Plano, Org.n, Gult.r. 43 years. movie lickets in exchange for your lime. Please bug stressed that the two groups are experience in college helped him The majority ofthe songs were writ­ product from hame 10 Sr. Supt. of Cuslodial enlHic calculator. like new. $80.00 D.b.a. ISH Camp Counselor: Roughing It Day Camp. Orinda. alileveis. styles. NY City Opera. musicals. call 969-6987 lor more info. (3129·418) Services. mail code 0908. (411-418) 453-0236. (4/1·415) actually quite different. develop the concepts that come out ghetto - people like Camus and at UCSD. The group has recently ten by Jacobs, some of which date group counselor. horseback riding. walerfront. lop clubs. BM Chicago Conservalory of experlrefs. (510) 283·3795. (3129-4/1) Music. Specl.1 student fe •• sing/play Wanted : Mac Power Book 100 Series. Cheap "They [Arrested Development] on the album. Sartre. But we say tho e names in a released its first album,Never Alolle, back to hi sophomore year in high COLLEGE FlNANCtAL AID: U Skyrocketing DODGE 1981 . Greal around Ihe town carl Runs ea~y model. Leave message at 534·2915. (31 easllyl quickly. Michael Bondon 598· 5223. greal. $600 o.b.o. Catl Heatner 453·6028. 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LtVE-IN AIDE HEEDED. Disabledstudent needs California State University, Long Beach help with personal care. moms/eves, weekdays or weekends. 3·5 hrslday slaggered. Start • 8 Wolff Beds September. Female, noo-smoker. On campus . • 2 Facial Tanners SlIIIIID8r SellloIll993. May 3Hul, 9. JUDe 21-Jul, 11. , 622·1122 Three SeuiOlll Jul, 12-Auguat 20 • Brand New Bulbs LOST & FOUND Over 1.:Dl c~ oIlered No lormal adminioD to the • 25 Minute Sessions OPEN 7 DAYS Laet !at quarter - a blue and willie in 7S departm8lltl CSULB UniYenity required aqua uHlvasm 7 DAYS WEEK w1ndbrN1cer jacketllndpr..atptian ~ • Eaay regiltratioo-VISA II Day and eftniDg c1a_ a RewW 79 EmiiiiOii r.-O---~~~~-~O~~~I 4 pm to CLOSE MasterCard accepted SERYICES Units are translenable I 10 Yo OFF any I unIlmltecL.a friend gets I only at PERSONALS Call lor a fret elau acbecIuIe: (310) ..2360. or write 10: UDlftllity ExteIllioD &erne.. : c:lothlng purchase I 7140 Miramar Road CSULB. 1250 Bellflower IIYd.. Loag IIeaclI. CA !III4I).UJ2 FREE MONTH: Den"'. F. - Very int"elled '" the ••y you've got ... da you need a IHdlng lady, ~:,~= I UNUMITEDTANS ar i. the rale alr"dy caet? -Ju.1 Curlou. ______wit. .. CQ<4)On. Exp. ~/XJ193 LNew ______c:Ients ~~:" lfudent _ D. (4/1) 6 OPINION The U(;SD Guardian Thursday, Apl'ill, 1993 Thursday, April 1, 1993 The UCSD Guardian SPORTS 7 beating and sexual deviance and mo­ TALK: Shows lestation are merely public displays reflect our social ills of what has always gone on in Tritons Clip UCSD Lambastes Leopards in Three America. I tend to think. however, - STOP! Continued from pee. 4 that life in the United States has not eel, 9-5 VOLlIYBALL: Tritons How could JOU beings could be. They are driven by always been so twistedandaccursedly capture secood win of the the libido for the hideous. The maxim populated by such a fiagr'dnt march­ USER" , • UCSD scores possibly go .IIB day of the talk show is that deviants will ing band of fools. This is not to sound season, 15-9,15-817-15 nine with two out in sev­ wllIIout a lUng for receive the best rating. Therefore, DIIcu.II.,... .. an atavistic clarion, but a society is By BlaIr RIdley every talk show host looks for that defined by the spiritual and cultural enth inning for victory TheUCSO...... , dIIv_ by the IIIIdo Staff Writer toothless inbred kid who plays the values that it adheres to. By Grea Wrenn The UCSD men's volleyball team Heck,_II ... banjo. Even if human appetites have al­ for the hideous. Sports Editor sconxIilstirslon-the~winonTucs­ pay JUII. SerIously. Some critics might contend that ways been so relentlessly vulgar, life Every talk show host It wasn't a severth-inning stretch for day night when it defeated the Univer­ (Experience handling live monkeys perhaps talk shows are talking about before talk shows would have been the UCSD t.seball team, it was an sity of La Verne in tIYee games, 15-9, beneficial but not required.) things that have always been an un­ looks for that more noble. Its most redeeming fea­ explosion. Down 3-1, with two out in 15-8, 17-15. Call 534 6580 dercurrent in American society. Yes, ture would be that at least] wouldn't toothless II ...... kid thetopofthesevcmh,theTrilonsbombed Chuck ,.,...,/&.11.., Tyson KerrandTaylorSmiIh paved far IID8 lifo. it is indeed possible that our lives have to hear about how wretched man host Ouist College of Irvine ftr eiglt Ben M .... picked up the win. the way fcx' the Tritom with II kills today with their concentration on wife- .who plays a...... can become. runs, giving them all the scoring they Of UCSD's eight hits, seven came apiece. Neal O'Brien added 14 digs in needed to biumph, 9-5. in that severXh inning. the winning cause. Marcos Magdaleno was the spart- The offemive output helped aIlevi- The victory malted the first lime TmRD COLLEGE COUNCIL SUPPORTS MARsHAILCOIJ4EGE PROPOSAL plug for the Tritons' incttdible rally aleashaityTritonpitchingperfonnm:e this season that UCSD finished the when, wihtwooutslfldtheblsesloadc:d, in which the UCSD hwlets gave up 11 march willi over a .200 hitting percenl­ Editor: for the lack of student involvement in Third would want Third College to True Christians Face he doublet1 into the left cuner to clear walks. FreshrnanBcn Mangan came 00 age. Provost Cec iI Lytle's proposed re­ the renaming process. continue growing as it has with its Guilt By Association the blsesand put the Tritons up4-3. The with two out in the boUan of the fifth to Anocher key statistic in the win was steve ~ and 1"yIon Kerr ao for the block durInC UCSO'. win. naming of Third College to Thurgood A forum was held on March 4 in incorporation of the new DOC cur­ nextbatter,PatHart, walked,n1heand record the tirsI win ofbic; C81M"_ thenumberofdigs, where UCSDnearly "WeexeculCd very wen duoughout which occurcd in three straight games aI Marshall College is supponed by the which approximately 130 students, riculum, and to rename Third to Editor: MagdaIenowerelroughlhomebyOaig "We just couldn't find the plate all doubled La Verne, 49-26. the whole match. We also did agoodjob La Verne. Third College Student Council. How­ faculty and staff attended, to discuss Marshall would only help Third In response ro Philip Michaels' BiJk.'stllree-runbiasttogiveUCSDa7- day," UCSD Head Coach Lyle Yates UCSD Head Coach Rod Wilde was of conIrolling their primary hitters," he UCSD (2-18) will play host to the ever, Council was surprised to learn the renaming proposal. Both Provost progress with its educational and so­ article "The Mob Squad Strikes 3 lead. A couple of singles and errors said "But we finally put togethec a pleased with all facets of his team's said. University of Southern California on in the Feb. 25 issue of the Guardian Lytle and Nick Aguilar along with cial responsibilities. Again" (Feb. 25) I would like to de­ \aler. the inning came to a merciful end . Iegitimare rally and complete irming. game, "We did a nice job with our The win enabled the Tritons to Saturday night aI 7 p.m. in the Main that the renaming would take place other students who attended were able During the March II Council fend myself as a so-called "born-again for the Eagles. ThaI was the story of the game." digging and our transition game. avenge their previous loss to La Verne, Gym. sometime during March or April, af­ to layout their concerns. Some stu­ READERS' meeting a consensus was taken in Christian." First of all, Mr. Michaels ter being informed of the proposal dents who attended were able tocom­ which renaming Third to Thurgood seems (0 make some sweeping gener­ one week before by Provost Lytle. municate their concerns on how Third Marshall was supponed (12-y, I-N). alizations about Christianity which Third Council was not notified the College has its own identity to each The majority of the council did not are not based on any SOIl of fact Pacific Beach proposal would be acted on so quickly. Third student, andhowthe name Third FORUM SUppoIl the renaming process (1 -Y, whatsoever. When Mr. Michaels That same week, many students is special because itis inclusive. How­ 11Ie Guardian ...elcomes /etters from its readers. I-A, II-N). On the option of having states that "the born-again Chris- We resetVe the ril/llt to edit for IerWfh ;n1 cJwity. attended the regularly scheduled ever, Marshall is a name that exem­ . The Guardian not to change Third College's narne at tians ... don't care much for Mor- BREWHoUSE OpiniOn Editor Council meeting to discuss their con­ plifies the Third College philosophy all, Council was divided (4-Y,3-A,4- mons .. . " he insinuates that Chris- MI CROBREWERY R ESTA U RTANT 9500 Gilman Dr. 0316 & cerns about renaming the college, as by his dedication to defending hu­ La )oRa. CA 920930316 N). tians as a whole do not get along with well as voicing their disappointment manitarian rights. Most founders of Third College Council Leaders other religions. Contrary to this, Jesus THURSDAY SUNDAY called us to love all men, and warned "Do not judge .. . Donotcondemn ..... COLLEGE BEER COLLEGE PIZZA and called us to "Forgive ...." (Luke From 3-6 pm Monday through & SPAGHETII NIGHT & PITCHER NIGHT 6:37) It is not that Christians do not like Mormons but rather that we dis­ Friday with student ID h - SPAGHETTI $3 -ALL h w/meat or Marinara 99 agree with their teachings. Two complete dinners for only sauce & bread This, of course, does not give any $9.90 with student ID (after 5 pm) right to harass, and assuming that Mr. Good thru 6/30/93 foot V2 ycrd you .:~es $5 0e~. Michaels' article was not exagger­ - MICROBREWED $ 00 PITCHERS OLD TOWN,SAN DIEGO • 298-0133 ated, which is a big assumption, the BEERS 1 (after 5 pm) glasses individuals involved in the protest at AlllO-oz. (after 7 pm) the Mormon Temple were far out of SPRING 1993 line in their behav ior as far as Chris­ *Remember all $1.00 * * Try the THAI * tianity goes. INTERESTED IN BUS/NESS? beers are NOT THE SAllE! CHICKEN PlUA! WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY It is unfollunate that these persons MAIlCH3} APRIL I APIlILl APRIL 3 who make a habit of harassing other 4475 Mission Blvd. 274.ALES people are the "Christians" who are MEEfTHE ZEBES DINNER WITH comer of Mission & Gamet • SeaCoast Square __---­ INFONlGtrr BEACH DAY & BBQ most often seen by the public, but • FREE PARKING off of Hornblend St. PRICE CENTER ROUND TABLE PIZZA DELTA GAMMA SORORITY AT THE BUBBLE HOUSE PLAZA BULL'S EYE TAVERN MEET .4:f PORTER'S PUB IN DELMAR suffice it to say that there are indeed 6:00PM AT 7:00 PM AT 6:00PM 1:00PM Christians in this world who" ... love RUSH I • SEMI·FORMALATnRB WOUlD BE APPREOi\JED [their] neighbor as [themselves]" (Luke 10:27) and who do not practice ALPHA KApPA PSI such a judgmental attitude toward Co-ed Professional Business Fraternity SUNDAY MONDAY TUESDAY others. APIlIL4 APRILS APRIL 6 As a Christian, ] am tired of being SUNSET AT THE CUFFS NCAAFlNALS 3 ON 3 BASKETBAll. likened to such individuals as those Information Night Tonight! OUR OLDEST TRADITION AT THE ZBT HOUSE & BBQ AT MUIR COURT'S who harass people, who do not be­ 7:00pm Galbraith Hall 1438 KICK BACK AND ENJOY SOME 5:00PM 4:00PM long to their faith and who abuse their SUBS 5:00PM First Amendment rights. ]t is true See our Rush Table in the Price Center this week. many people use Christianity to abuse and harass individuals, however, sweeping generalizations of Chris- tianity do more harm than good. Also, the insinuation that Chris­ Onl., \ fill ('an IIclp ... tians walk around condemning others and calling others heretics is highly stereotypical, for in reality a true Chris- Earn money for your tian approaches others with an open blood donation! bean and with love. Likening Chris­ tianity to McCanhyism and the Holo- I If you have active I I) I) .) \ /' /' i " g caust is entirely out of line. symptoms or have had Come/o.in us for 23reaiifasl r am sure that by questioning any Christian about his or her stand on one of the following CELEB.RATION OF TIlE ARTS H...... these events would show that true diseases: at UCSD slarHng 71pr.lf5 .... ,.,. Christianity is on the side of reason. Hepatitis Rh·Flctor Rubella • ...... DC Christianity i II0 ( about mobs, it is ..... Stewart Prizes in Literature: /lui about violence, and what it is Syphilis Lupus "others ..... CIIr about is love. London 3~gg Omlettes Belgian Waffles Your blood can be wonh berwun FrInkfwt Poetry & Fiction Mr. Michaels' closing sentence $40-$200 per donation ;:e,r.ye.::,,~~ .:.:=~~ : $100.00 each French Toast "much more " ... ifyou can't beat 'em, why nOBry _ .. DIla ..." tit """,rod . kicking 'em instead?" sums up the ...... belief that so many non-Christians Call MD Laboratories The DEADUNE for submissions is FRIDAY, APRIL 16th at 4 PM have concerning Christianity. This is (.4 subsidiary of H,maCau Cotp«a/ioll) Council"'" the belief that harms so many Chris- San Diego ucso Plicc CG'kr (by the Past Office) See the Ute["'~ture Depanmem for inforrnaion and Zips 7ummy 23usler tians, because to be stereotyped into entry fontlS. Quesions?Co ntact Nancy Hesketh! (619)226-1733 451·0630 ?rice Ie! 4StJ ~OO70 this type of role leaves no room to Debbie Morrow, 3110 Literature Building Genler, ~ m_~=i!i!iim=mt=_iiiin ~ prove otherwise. ______TanYI Mercado 8 SPORTS The UCSD Guardian Th~rsday, April 1, 1993 _5fRANascD Why Don't FISh Explode? 1 sal cabnly at the boaom of the pool looking up through my mask at the blurry figw-es staring down at me. I'd been there for several minutes, comfonably submerged and resting on the concrete floor. "Hey," 1 thought, "I could get into this." That shott experience I had with a SCUBA tank during a visit to Hawaii with my parents convinced me that I really wanted to wander the depths of the oceans, daring to tread where only fish had dared to go. It took some saving and procrasti­ nating, but finally I signed up for a SCUBA class. I was off to the underworld. Once home I began leafing through the manuals and workbooks given to students by the nice people who took all my money. Interspersed with cute little graphics on how to clear your snorkel or check your air tank were diagrams of what happens to your body when you come up to the surface too fast, how to avoid getting sharks excited and something called a "stone fish," which appears to enjoy hiding in rocks and sand until a poor, unsuspecting diver steps on it Hold on, I thought, maybe I shouldn't be rushing into this. 1read on. . It seems that a human is apt to John Crou needed tine sets to bold orr WlI.... ' Marlin Goldstein 7~ (7-5), 4-6, 6-1 In UCSO's 7-2 victory on Monday afternoon. explode, or implode, or something, when wandering among the fish. You've got to go up and down slowly, they say. WeD, what if you're being UCSD Nets Blowout Win chased by something, say a sharlc? Will the sharlc wait while you take a three-minute breather to decompress MEN'S IUns: Tritons win third before fleeing his six-inch mandibles home match in less than a week of death? Duffers Tame Apparently all it takes to get a By Art Root shark worked up into a frenzy is Associate Sports Editor something called "chumming," which Williams College, venturing all the way from Wood Ranch seems to involve dumping animal Massachusetts, probably doesn't want to make any intestines into the ocean. Why would more visits to sunny La Jolla After all, the Tritons are By BrIan K. Hutto you do that? Do people frequently such rude hosts. The UCSD men's tennis team, Staff Writer throw intestines or other internal enjoying a busy stretch of home matches, made sure You'd think if PGA great Arnold Palmer organs into the water? When they do, Williams' stay on the Muir tennis courts would be couldn't handle the heal. the UCSO golf team do divers get a head start on these short and unpleasant by breezing to a 7-2 victory on would stay clear of the kitchen. Well, think hungry beasts or willI have to Monday afterooon. The win was UCSD'sthirdhome­ again. sacrifice my friend so 1 might live? court victory in eight days. The Tritons devoured the Cal Lutheran Obviously, this is of some concern UCSO Head Coach Tun Invitational competition held at Wood Ranch or they wouldn't have told me about it, Oitzler wac; impressed by his Country Oub in Simi Valley on March 29, right? team's performance. "We finishing 36 holes with a winning tally of 598 And what about these stone fISh, had solid performances from (304-294). Cal State Northridge grabbed sec­ and this thing called a sea wasp? top to bottom. I'm really ond, shooting 610 (310-300) and Long Beach Apparently I'm not supposed to step happy about how weplayed," Jason RItdlIe/GUBIlIIan State followed with a 611 (300-311). on that either. And then there are eels; he said Vern Yarnell won In straight eets for UCSD. Once a regular stop on the Senior PGA I really hate eels. Williams got off to a good overall team victory in the last four outings. Tour, the course was dropped from the sched­ And about this exploding thing, start, as Dennis Geronimus UCSO's bid to clinch the overall team victory ule because of its high difficulty level. "It is how come fISh don't explode when stopped UCSO's number­ before doubles play was dashed at number-six singles 6,552 yards of pure hell," said Head Coach fi sherman pull them from their happy one singles player Jeff when Williams' John Fishion handed Triton Jeff Mike Wydra. "These boys are as tough as home 100 feet under? I think this Bethard in the opening match, Young a 6-3, 64 defeat. nails." question might keep me awake at winning 7-6 (7-5),4-6,6-3. The number~ doubles tandem of Bethard and Individually, the Tritons madeaclean sweep night John Cross, playing at Cross ended Williams' upset hopes by handling of- the top three spots, led by junior Dale Well, the nice people at the Diving number-two, outlastcd Mar­ Geronimus and Eric Roiter, 6-3, 64. At number­ Abraham's 147 (75-72), senior Jeremy Moe's Locker have my money now, so I lin Goldstein 7-6 (7-3), 4-6, 6-1 to give UCSD its fU'St two doubles, Yamell and Brian Kaplan were too 149 (75-74) and sophomore Pete Robert's 150 guess I'm going to go through with my win of the afternoon. In number-three singles play, much for the Williams tandem of Young and Brooks (78-72). class, despite my growing concerns. Vern Yamell gave the Tritons another victory with a Perlin, winning easily 6-3, 6-1. Other contributors to the victory were Tom But it is now becoming clear why they 6-3,6-2 drubbing of Neil Glass. Young and Hogave UCSO (54) a clean sweep of Brown's round of 153 (76-77) and Brock were so intent on getting my check Robbie Ho' s easy victory at number four, coupled the three doubles matches by scoring a three-set, 2-6, Shafer's 154 (78-76). before passing out the workbooks. with Roy Gessford's straight-set, 6-3, 6-1 bIitting of 6-3, 6-1 victory over Goldstein and Dan Polsby. "Everybody on the team broke 80 on both They must have experienced chickens Eric Woodworth, gave the Tritons fourstraigltsingles ''We definitely closed [Williams] out. It was a rounds," said Wydra. "'fhat's outsranding f0f a of my sort before. victories and left UCSD one win away from its third good rilatch," Ditzler said. course like this." Ahead The He ••• MatdIup: a.elllll VI. PoInt Loma ,..... ColaIB, today at 2:30 p.m., b•• abel cIamond. Other Games: Women's teMis vs. UC Santa Cruz. tod6t at 3 p.m., MuW tennis COIIts. Women's softball vs. C8I Lutheran, friday at 2 p.m., softball diamond. Golf vs. CSU San Bernardino and csu Domi~uez HUts, Friday at 1 p.m., Torrey Pines. Men's YO/Ie)t)aII vs. USC, SabIday at 7 p.m., Main Gtm. Crew at the San DieIO Crew Classic, Saturday and Sunday at 7 a.m., Mission Bay. Track at UC Riverside, Saturday. Men's tennis at Claremont College, SabKday. Women's water polo at UC Santa Barbara, Friday.Sunday. Hockey playoffs, Friday at 7 p.m., San Diego lee Arena. Elsewhere T H E DISRE UCR Searches For New School Mascot RIVERSIDE-Officials at UC Riverside announced yesterday that they planned to do away with their current mascot, the beloved Highlander. Instead, UCR hopes to adopt a mascot that symbolizes the quality of life in Riverside. Finalists for the NOTSDSU! THURSDAY,APRILl,1993 VOLUME 79, ISSUE 0 po ition include a tree loth, a diseased pigeon and a lightly overweight Shriner named Earl, who delights children of all ages by riding around on his John UC to Slash Fees, Cut Administrative Size Deere power mower. BUDGET: 'Power to the nation of all assistant vice presi­ "But, I must say, I do feel em­ Cash Flow dents and assistant vice chancellors powered by all of this," he added. A look at all the money the More Budget Cuts people,' President Peltason Regents are spewing back our next year. Also announced were plans for way: HIt Sail DIego State proclaims to press corps "After reading the thousands of several fundraising events, includ­ SAN DIEGO - Officials of letters sent by students to my office ing UCSD Vice Chancellor Joseph SDSU announced yesterday By Phil Rizzuto criticizing the fee hikes I came to the Watson's plan for a 10K run in the that budget constraints have For the Money Store conclu ionthatsomethingelsemust San Diego area. forced them to eliminate six Ina move designed to quell grow­ be done," Peltason said ye terday. "I truly think running is good, departments, which will re ult ing student protest over the fourth "How can I sit idly by and watch and I really appreciate the fact that in the layoff of hundred of straight year of fee increase , UC this university sy tern crumble be­ [Watson] was good enough to bring faculty members and tenured President Jack Peltason 'announced fore my eyes when there is some­ this to my attention," Peltason said. profe sors. Fortunately, SDSU plans to suspend the recently ap­ thing I can do to help," he added. According to UC spokesman Salvador Dali/ Dead was able to spare it Greek proved fee increase and instead fur­ "We must begin to give more power Mike Lassiter, the total savings will However, the plan is being met ystem, ensuring the rights of ther streamline the university ad­ to the people." far outweigh the money lost by re­ with some resistance among Third students to drink themselves ministration. University of Cali fomi a Student cinding the fee increase. "In fact, College students. into an oblivion every weekend. The move, if approved by the Association (UCSA) Executive Di­ we should tum a tidy little profit," "While we agree that the roll­ "When you're a State student, regents later this month, will be the rector Andy Shaw was stunned by he s·aid. back is a good idea we don't under­ drinking is all you have," said first fee rollback in the history of the the announcement. Lassiter added that the rollback stand why student input wasn't in­ SDSU spokesman Rick Moore. university. "While we are pleased and grati­ will include everyone "but UC Riv­ cluded in the decision-making pro­ The plan, which is not yet for­ fied at Peltason's change of heart 1 erside." ce s," said irate Third College se­ 'Plaid Guy' Finally malized according to Peltason, can't help but think he's making "We really don't like Riverside nior Bucky Quinn. Expelled From UCLA would involve the wholesale elimi- some sort of joke," he said. that much," he said. See BUCKS, Page 13 LOS ANGELES - UCLA officials announced yesferday that sophomore Abi Raval, CAUGHT IN THE ACT ... Fifth College to be otherwise known as the 'Plaid Guy' would be expelled from that UC campus for refu ing to Renamed Fortas conform to the university's SHAKER: Influential Fifth College students' reaction stringent dress code. Raval to the new name ranged from hostile gained national attention and justice to bring fame to indifference to passive opposition. many shocked glance when he ailing Fifth College " I think its appalling," said per­ insisted on coming to school in By Rufus W. Peckham plexed Fifth College Freshman plaid leisure uits. A campus­ Cleveland Appointee Willa Cather. "I mean, •Fish' was a wide 'plaid-in' was held in Following the decision last good show and all, but does the guy Raval's honor. month by Third College to rename really deserve to have a college itself Thurgood Marshall College named after him?" UC Irvine Students afterthe late Supreme Court Justice, "Yeah, sure, whatever," said Hold Anti-UCR Rally Fifth College announced yesterday Fifth College Senior Roger Taney. fRVINE- To the chants of "At plans to adopt the name of former "Who the hell i Abe Fortas?" least we're not Riverside," UCI Justice Abe Fortas, who served on asked UCSD Chancellor Richard tudems celebrated their 15th the high court from 1965 to 1969. Atkinson. anniversary. "We may be the "If Third College can have a Forta , who died in 1982. was Anteaters, but it could always be name. then by God. we can have a unavailable for comment. worse," said a jubilant student. name, too," declared Fifth College Forta , who was appointed by Provo t James Lyon during a pres Lyndon Johnson in 1965 to replace conference and commuter break­ Arthur Goldberg, had a less-than­ fast yesterday. Citing Fortas' "pro­ distinguishing record during his Inside found comm ittment to the pursuit of four-yeartenureon the nation's high­ truth,ju tice and the American way," est court. A ajurist, Fortas mayor Lyon said the decision to name Fifth may not be best known for his dis­ after the late justice was reached by sent in A l'elY v. Midland County, in a special ad-hoc advi ory legisla­ which he vigorously argued against tion committee after "several hours" the Court's doctrine of equal appor­ of deliberative brain-storming. tionment. Alfred Stieglitz/Camera Guy If approved by the UC Regents, In 1969, Fortas was chosen by Chancellor RIchard Atkinson prepares to address an assembly of Fortas College would be the third President Nixon to replace retiring the class of '97. "Where did I leave my keys?" Atkinson asked. college at UCSD to be named after Chief Justice Earl Warren. Fortas His secretary later found them In the Chancellor's other pants. a dead Supreme Court justice. See FORTAS, Page 3

ELL-O Howes Suspends A.S. Elections at Council Meeting RECEPTACLE: Jell-O­ By Matthew Schnurer members and students was swift A.S. Advisor Randon Woodard be­ it 's all the rage with kids Programmer for Life and noticeable. gan laugh uncontrollably. today. Let's learn more about Declaring that the current uncer­ "Fine with me," said Fifth Col­ "Ha ha, ha ha, ha ha," said it. R20 tainty about the co-op negotiations lege Senator Craig Bardsley. Woodard. and student autonomy required sta­ "There were elections coming "That's pretty funny," he added SPORT!: The Tritons took bility in the Associated Students up?" agreed Vice President Exter­ off the record. two of three against Cal Council, A.S. President Mike nal Colin Wilson. In spite of uch criticism, Holmes Lutheran in bocce ball. 11 Holmes suspended next week's elec­ "Mike Holmes will still be pre6i­ remained steadfast in his decision, tions at last night's A.S. meeting. dent? Who the hell i Mike pointing out that a "virtual dictator­ "A transition of power at this Holmes?" asked confused Muir se­ ship" would only strengthen the Index point i n't in the best interest of nior Jessica Scott, who has been position of all students. student ," Holmes told the council. dating Holmes since 1990. democracy, an atrocity of the high­ "Besides, all of the candidates PETER eRr ...... 2 "I have no choice but to uspend Not everyone reacted favorably est order ... a ... urn, what exactly this year are incredible rube and DI I FORMATJO ...... 3 elections and declare myself presi­ to Holmes' announcement. are we talking about again?" said half-wit ," Holme aid. "Mo I of PROPAGANDA ...... 4 dent for an indefinite period." "This isa travesty,adark day for local rabble-rouser Ely Rabani. them aren't man enough to carry my GIBBON ...... 10 Reaction among other council student govemment, a black eye for When infonned of the decision, See MIKE, Page 9 FUTO -O-RMIA ...... 5 EX EX EX ...... YO WI H I 2 NEWS The Diareguardian Thuraday, Aprill, 1993 Thurs.-lay, pril L, J 9«)3 The Disreguardian NEW 3 Latest Stuart Collection ETCETERA. • • A.S. MEETING NOTES Reggae Festival Rocks Price Center By Ducky Simpson many students filled the bowl that Each band said different things. Piece Gets Rave Reviews Co-op Update-A.S. President Mike Holmes demanded that co-op members Siberian Salt Miner they seemed to merge in a multicol­ Most of what they said was about agree to mow the lawn in front of his house or he would reject the proposed co­ The atmosphere was spiced and ored throbbing layer. love and getting along, and then ART: Students, faculty and administrators are all agog op Memorandum of Understanding ... Look, it·s a really small lawn and the grass lively at UCSD's annual Reggae The band that played at first, stuff about pot. is getting really long ... it's not much to ask, " he said. GSA representative Steve Festival at Price Center Saturday. when j ust a few bleary-eyed ras ta People Power guy said, " Don't over local artist Richard Barnard's new 'White Rock' G o S~ DAbJ , ~ Dubb agreed that the grass at Holmes' house was · simply way too long" but te; A F\)", GUV n> People and students gathered in fans laced the grounds, was Mitey drink alcohol, j ust smoke.. . " By Andy WIIIttoI asked why his piece was called questioned why the co-ops were the only party asked to cut it. "The adminis· tWE fiIOJwn ! HE't: tration should work with us on this, they always get off easy. It just isn't fair," their tie-dyed shins and pants with Mite. Then came People Power, and Everybody danced, except the AJtBoy "White Rock" when he had painted WlI~c..o-r "TiM € ! he said. The motion was referred to the committee on the co-op negotiations fanciful patterning, just a few at then Charlene's Sister, when the people sitting out on the weeds be­ "White Rock," the newest addi­ it blue, Barnard replied, " Because for further deliberation. The motion to refer passed 15 to 2, with one first, then more and more came as crowd was congested and the air hind the barricade, incensed by the tion to the Stuan Collection, was K-Manhadaspecial on Dutch Boy." abstention. the bands began to play, until so was enveloped by seeds ofpromi se. resonating tones of the reggae. unveiled before students, faculty and Most present at the inauguration UC Riverside-A.S. President Mike Holmes submitted a resolution banning all administmtors on Monday. ceremony had nothing but pmise Fonas... Fifth ... see, it kind of possibly Lincoln-appointee Stephen The bminchild of local artist for "White Rock." UC Riverside transfer students from attending classes at UCSD. "I just don't FORTAS: Fifth like Riverside, " he explained during deliberations. However, Fifth College sounds the same," he explained. J. Field, might have been bener Patrick Barnard, "White Rock" con­ "I think it's wonderful," said Lit­ senior Senator John Carpuders objected. "If we are going to ban Riverside takes neat name Political Science Professor Peter choices. sists of an ordil13J)' IO-pound rock erature professor Hugh S. Lin. "It's students we might as well include Irvine as well," he said. The Riverside ContInued from page 1 Irons. who played an instrumental Some other names under consid­ sponing a fresh coat of blue paint. not only art. It has a function as well. resolution passed 15 to 2, with one abstention. Council members agreed to withdrew his nomination and re­ role in the Third College renaming, eration in recent years have included: The piece will cost You can lift it. You examine the possibility of banning Irvine students at next week's meeting. signed from the coun after it was was baffled by the Fifth College Pangaea, World, International, Gaia, the university ap­ can throw it. You discovered that he accepted a life­ decision. " My God, if they wanted a Ghandi, Woodrow Wilson, John F. proximately $3 mil­ can use it as a pa­ Committee Issue-Vice President Administrative Randolph Siwabessy sub­ time retainer ofS20,OOO a year from mitted a resolution to create three new committees to look into the increasing judge with an 'F' in his name, they Kennedy, William Fulbright and lion. perweighl." number of A.S. Council committees . "I just don't understand," he said . The Las Vegas Casino tycoon and re­ could have at least picked one who George Marshall. UCSD students " Barnard has resolution was referred to the committee on committees. The motion to refer puted racketeer Albert Parbin. actually did someth ing." Irons sug­ "So what if the guy [Fortas 1was are quite familiar made a brilliant po­ passed 15 to 2 with one abstention. "Abe was a victim of bad timing gested th at Felix Fra nkfurter, who a schmuck. l'mj ust happy we actu­ with Barnard's litical statement. By and bad circumstances," said one served from 1939 until 1962, or ally have a name." Lyon said. work.. He was the "II•• It. It Is v.,­ painting this rock Weasels-Warren junior Senator Blaine MagUire submitted a proposal which former Fonas clerk. " So he took driving force behind white, he is speak­ would classify the A.S. Council as "a collection of sniveling weasels looking to money. It's not like killed anybody. " the numerous " No pretty. I like the ing for the albino in satiate their mad lust for power." "I mean, let's not spl it hairs," said Maguire. The resolution passed unanimously. According to Naming Commit­ Parking" signs fact that It Is all of us," Lin tee Chair Sam Chase, Fortas' con­ which adorn the lots painted. I cIdn't added. Questions-Third Sophomore Senator Thomas Block submitted a resolution troversial past was not considered around campus. know you could do The Albino Stu­ concerning the order of questioning during council meetings. There was no in the selection process. The real "I wanted to try that. " dent A ssociation debate because "Of a disagreement over the order in which members were reason, accordi ng to Chase, was the something different could not be allowed to speak. It was referred to the Committee on Council Questions by a narne. " Well, its like, Fifth College with thispiece, " said ~ Atkinson reached for com- vote of 15 to 2, with one abstention. has a certain ri ngto it,youknow? So Barnard of his latest UCSD Chancellor ment. DIs-Appointments : we wanted a name with kind of a creation. "Ithoughtto myself, •You Even administrators were lavish · Colin Wi lson appointed as Member·at·Large to Committee on Relations with ring to it. Then there was that see all sorts of rocks - big rocks, in their praise of "White Rock. " Students Caring for Traumatized Pets. Marshall thing at Third. We thought small rocks, jagged rocks and "I like it. It is very pretty. I like ·David Garden appointed to Select Committee on Monkeys. that was prerty cool, 'naming the Discount good all year c.: smooth rocks.' When was the last the fact that it is painted. I didn't place after a j udge and all. So we Electrolysis Treatments ~ Allocations: (permanent hair removal) time you ever saw a white rock? know you could dothat," saidUCSD thought, why don 't we do that? And Using Disposable Needles "Well, now you can," Barnard Chancellor Richard Atkinson. • $3,000 to new publication, Waft/e, which promises to take no stand on any that's what we did." 9 yrs. experience issue. "We feel we need to represent the views of the average UCSD student," added with a knowing grin. Atkinson also responded to crit­ Chase said the committee wan ted Ca lifornia Registered Eleclrologist said editor John Wuru s. "Or maybe not.· FREE Consultation "White Rock" is the product of ics who charged that the $3 million BRIEFLY ... • $1.95 to A. S. President Mike Holmes for a fritter and some coffee. a name that sounded like ·'Fifth ." Azita Amini 454-6044 two years of painstaking work on price tag for " White Rock" was too -Compiled by Abe Vigoda, Really, Really Bored but not really. ·'Forras .. . Fifth ... 737 Pearl Street the part of Barnard. For months, extmvagant. Atkinson dismissed Suite #208·A La loll a. Ca A7\"~~ Barnard scoured the greater San such criticisms as foolish. Talking Tree Mangled in Freak Mishap 92037 Diego area, searching for.just the " Such criticisms are foolish," One of UCSD's famous talking trees was accidentally band The Monkees, will appear at Peterson Hall tonight right rock. Atkinson said. chopped down during a tree thinning operation Tuesday. at 8 p.m. Tork's speech, entitled "I'm Not Your Stepping After finding the right rock, " Besides, what on earth would ' The tree, part of UCSD Stuart Collection and a favorite Stone, " will cover his career with the Monkees, his lean r---­ Barnard spent the remaining months we spend all that money on?" he stop for campus tour guides, was deemed a total loss years during the Carter administration, his recent co~ I applying a coat of blue paint. When added. by the art collection 's director Lauren Bemthal. back with the Christian rock band " New Testament" and According to Bemthal , no other art pieces were his ongoing feud with Michael Nesmith. I injured in the accident. "I'm really looking forward to appearing at UCSD," I Director of Tree TrirTVTling and Foliage Grooming Tork said from his horne in Riverside. "You wouldn't Activities Tim Perry claimed responsibility for the acci­ believe how nice it is to get out of Riverside, let me tell I Watson Pulls KSDT's Plug dental chopping yesterday. you." I "I cannot tell a lie," he said. "I was roaming through IF YOU CAN1 I In a surprise move that could jockey Howie Kasem. the grove with my axe and I noticed that the particular UCSD Captures First Place In affect the future of student organi­ According to Watson, KSDT tree in question looked a might sick and it was making I - r zations on campus, Vice Chancel­ was gi ven numerous chances to these wild screeching noises, you know. Well I just National ProtestIngCompetition \.._----- lor for Undergraduate Affairs Jo­ avoid being disestablished. "If they figured it was calling for someone to put it out of its Students from UCSD took first place at the 18th r ------\ seph Watson announced that he played a KISS album every now misery," Perry added. "I am really in touch with my Annual Tom Hayden Protestor Pro-Am in Los Angeles trees. " over the weekend. AFFORD TRAVEL, would " disestablish" K SDT , and then, or some Boz Skaggs, 10 I in I The tree was first erected for a cost of nearly $2 "Boy, UCSD students are great whiners,"said Hayden. LOSE 6" 2 HOURS UCSD's student radio station. maybe things would have turned million, but according to Bemthal replacing the tree wi ll "And I know a whiner when I see one : I Guaranteed ... $48 /lostinches, and my jeans II "For too long now, K SDT has out differently," said Watson, who ~ be much more expensive, "You must now take into I European Body Wrap fit now. It"s definitely worth it/" been operating in violation of uni­ added that he favored radio stations account the fact that old wiring no longer meets the new I . Mindy. San Diego I versity pol iciesand procedures. This with a light rock. less talk format. Califomia fire codes for talking trees: she said. Lose at least 6" or you don't payl ERRATA No exercise or dieting. Not a temporary water loss. is something we cannot tolerate,"' Chris Burnett, chair of the "And getting them to talk is no easymatter,letmetell OIN THE CLUB. I I you: In the March issue of the it was aid Watson. disestablished University Center 29 Disreguardiall. I GOLDEN TRIANGLE La Jolla Pt. Lorna H lll cr~'t I While no official estimate is available, Bemthal I PERFECT TAN 455-0952 224-9727 296·7004 I '·Besides," Watson added, ·'the Board, has said that he will take up mistakenly reported that students on an educational speculated off the record that the cost will exceed $4 tour of Europe ate goat cheese while in France. The 3251 Holiday Ct. Pacif ic ~~h Ml" lon Va ll ~y 5~te College music they play is pretty crappy. I KSDT"s fight in court. million. I ~~~g~~~et from EI Torito 581.9060 542-{)391 697.8014 I actual location ofgoat cheese consumption was North­ mean, the so ngs sound like "Students have the right to lis~en The talking tree is currently in storage where it is ~ ______Somo~tri::~II'PtY.Offer".,.,d,"",~ ______em [taly. The regrets the error. J . somebody's strangling a goat." to as much crappy music as they mumbling swear words and asking for its mother. Disreguardiall Students involved with KSDT want," Burnen said. Bemthal said that the damaged tree will be shipped to reacted angrily to the decision, de­ "If you take away that right, the UC Riverside next week. In the March 20 issue of the Disreguardiall, we "I don 't knowwhywe 're sendingitto UCR,ljustdon't fending their station aga inst next thing you know. we won't be mistakenly referred to administrators as "shi ftless, really like them that much," she said . Watson's criticism. allowed to buy Yoko Ono CDs," self-serving bureaucrats who have bad breath and "We do not play songs that sound added Burnett, a big fan of Ono's unkempthairwho would literally sell their mothers to like somebody 's strangling a goat. earlier work. Ex-Monk.. Peter Tork To Belgian terrorists if it meant more money for their A wombatmaybe,butagoat?That's -Peter Crt .. Speak on C.ampus Tonight greasy fingers." It turns out administrators have fine preposterous," said KSDT disc Master Skins Basher Peter Tork, frontman for the legendary 1960s rock breath. The Disreguardian doesn't much care. Traveling doesn' t have to mean snobby hotels that cost $200 a nighl. With a Hostelling International card you can stay in Paris for just $16, New York for ~ ColDe Our·· $t 9 or Tokyo for $23. Hostels even offer special discounts on everything from 1b .NeDM~ "FAT" CISCO DeVRIES, Garlic Farmer steve Lawrence and Edle Gormene. Suzanne Somers. Herve V1llechalze THEMES IN HEMINGWAY: Death . Impotence. War. Killing. Women . More museum fees and ski tifts to air, rail and ferry tickets. Plus they have fully Next MeetiDg ·lsAp.... 7~ · BEN "BLACKJACK" FREUND, Bookkeeper Impotence. Bull Rgnts. ParIs . DrInking. Spain. Old I Mention Impotence? equipped do-it·yourself kitchens, which not only salle you money but also are GORDON "N\NBERS~ HURD, The Hitman With A Heart I'IIOFESIIONAL WRESTI.StS: AIldre the Giant. Hulk Hogan. Randy "Macho great lor meeting fellow world travelers. 50 if you're looking for a less e pensive ROGER "DA RAJ" KUO, Legitimate Businessman Man' Sav• • "The Nature Soy' Ric Flair. Abdullah the Butcher, Cactus Jack. lbSlgnUP! Slllnner "FANCY" DAN McDOwnL, Sinatra's Pal Kine KGn, Bundy. Bill JOM Studd. Captain LOU Albano way to travel, join the club ..Call 619.338-9983 ottteINAL ...... OF IUSI: Peter Criss. Paul Stanley. Ace Freely. Gene "The A1IdItorhun (at The ~ I$ PIJIIIsr.cI br E-' In lIXIIIdit __ hl·s."....ad.,_ ...... PHIL "RATBOY" MICHAELS, Sleeps With The Ashes Demon- Simmons WIll M ite ~ ate AS. ~ ri INs new!CIIIIII II ." faIm Is. bid _ 00 l llld we·. JEFF -THE GENT" NIESEL, Good With A Wrench lAME TV IITCOMI: SIH1"5 the Shertrr. s-ny HI/I$ Suntz. Perfect Stnlngers. "InStructors Scripps) At 1dII )Qj. WI nul .-.1IoaIt1Wl In Ite 1IIIIn. So 1eI9'f11'J1- CINII. C1II83. _,.., ...... , "WCKY~ JASON RITCHIE, Pit Boss The Courtship of fck1le ·s 'ether. AIlythln, with Bob SllCet ... I!Ie _ ~ heIIIn ...... 1te dDdrtIeI rI .. "*C dlallld .. _., _)GI HOSTEWNG INTERNATIONAL Be On Hand 'Ib ARTIE "TIfE SCREW" ROOT, One Tough Customer lOB "MOONDOG" DeANDREA, ContnJct Killer HOSnALLlN G .... 1I'f1I'JI_"'*.Ite_fme~1hI_ .... dIrI,Iet ... IIaeIer)QU - we·18 The ntw Sdl of Ilpprowl of tilt I"t~,"a"on'" Youth Host~1 Ftdnallotf . 7:00P.M• Cement Mixer "THE FOULKS, As Seen On INTERNATIONA L· jill ~ rI"IIIOII"'~. WI·" lnIId SCIIIIf br u.s. WI dDIIn n. ri tIIIIW. 011' Ine rI DAMEN "THE FISH" SCRANTON, LEGEND" MICIIAIL TV ADswerYour IxloIIoC Sfm!*InI TiIft. - .. )GI ~., do IIIool It. 1** ba(I "SWEET" LAMINE SEeKA, Tumed State's Evidence MIKE -RItGO" MARTlNEZ, TIle F"tft/I Beatie or wri te to: DON BEN BOYCHUK, Simple Spice Merchant DAVID "YEU.A" SNOW, Our Boy In Sing Si/W E. LEIGH HENRY, Cusses Uke A Sailor Questions! GREGG "ACES" WRENN, Mr. Boychu/c's Tobacconist American Youth Hostels ERIC "RAZORS" SCHMIDT, Union Delegate EJu:uses: 5~N . eonf1tsslons: 534-Y1KE. Frttt.r HotJInot: 534-YUMM UI'I'IIWDTMOMINTS: Arlttlmewalldn&. nrstspeech. alOOOci&8'. nrst klss. 335 West Beech Street .CallTony@ "MA" SHANNON aEDSOE, Mafia Princess mlfrille. burl-' under pile of lOose dirt DIIIf8IllIIItdIan. 32.6 Avenue of the W ...... , San Diego, CA 92101 IWIIIiiH IIIAMD: 1Ifom. Olaf. Sl8fan. Otto. Incmor. 5Yen. ABIlA ~ Special Rates 535-8168 For "CRAZY" RENt BRUCKNER, Wise Guy va,...... II:AaronIlulT. ManJnVanBuntn.RIcnIRlNbIon.NeIsonRoctc.efeller. "Scenic La Jolla, CA 92093-032.6 MIGUB. "NO NOSE" BUCKENMEYER, Gangster Dude W_Mone. \IIewa ___ herein __ Joe _told us 10 wrol8 _ .. ho·,1rnpI.med IhoIa students and $3 for 12 words per 15 students. Staff is eligible for classifieds m__ In ua. It "'1 10 _._.111' ...."". ', hI you MY. Joe? Okey •••• scholarships or $54 per cubic pound of text, weighed on a National Bureau of Standards scale with only the finest of wafer thin pieces of meat. If you have a problem, don't take it out on us, because we just work here. After all, would you Fees, fees, fees. That's all we keep hearing about morning noon like typing and reading these damnable things? Then quit yer bitching. and night until we are forced to drive ice picks into out eardrums and pour cement down our bleeding ear canals to find the slightest sort Looking for a summer opportu­ A musK:ian interested in pi1irg the of relief. Just about everybody who is capable of enunciating FOR SALE nity, extra cash, added self-es­ most txJtt-kid:...... Formerly President of Tepper-Go/Iego5 Costing. perhaps the university should start matriculating trained monkeys­ Dixie. Indeed, the idealism of the gobble away at their deceitful briskel, as if the meat were Also appearing a Top HoIIo,"WOOd Talent Agent. assuming the monkeys haven't been extended a more enticing offer BEN modem day col\egeslUdent is much delicious to taste ralher than the rancid pack of lies it truly AD elsewhere. Or perhaps the university should convert all of its like the enthusiasm of a puppy. To is. Such mendacious galloping gounnets deserve my Saturday April 17 1993 all+1e Handlery Hotelm San Diego be sure, the puppy's antics are cute scorn, and if that makes me an egomaniac, then so be it. For Rp'>PfVOhOrl, coli 800·546·9020 Me ' V,,>O ur"l ltcd ~nrollmprt property into student co-ops and bagel factories. Or, above all, SPACE. .IIK at fIrst, just as the idealist may be I have neither the time nor the energy to appease the perhaps students should quit school.join the circus and spend the rest We're run out cuddly anddoe~yed. booOOisie. 1.1~II< > ~iil~~ :: of their days walking in the footsteps of creatures who could destroy But in no time. the It's like Mencken said - "Love is the ::::::::::.:.:.:: ... ::.:.:::::.:.: .. :: ...... ::.::... .. :: p.:...... ~ .. ... ::: :. :: ... ::.:::.:.::::::::::::: of filler STUDENT DISCOUNTS AVAILABLE them in a heartbeat. : ::::::: :::: :::: ::: : : ::::::: : : : ::: : ::: : : ::: ::::::.:.:.:··# ""':"i':' ,·; u ·.::.::.:::::: Cq~f:~e:: CQ(je::: l1:~93(} ::::::::: ideas. puppy becomes a snarling, wonn-infested delusion that one woman differs from an­ :::::::::::: ::::::::: ::: :::-:-:::::::::::: :::<::.: : 'ci,j :m;i:1: ········::: :::::::::::::::::: :::::::::::::::::::, . , , . old cur. And like a puppy lacking in house­ other,'· ] have no idea what this means or training, an idealist is wont to leave large even if it applies to what I'm saying here. · ...... , ... . . - ...... The Dme Has Come for a · ...... piles of excrement lying around the living but thai shouldn't matter. The point is that ....it Z ············ ···· ·· ······ ·········· ------Ruling Elite to Take Charge room, just waiting for you to tread on the Mencken said it. and I quoted him, so that TAKING THE mess with your brand-new ReeOOks. should be good enough for you. _., lIIy.::/:·[ ···. ·.([·::: AS. elections, A.S. elections, AS. elections. That's all we keep ]t is no wonder that I find the company Too many times. the self-appointed ·· ...... hideed, the I .. of ·· ...... GMAT? hearing about morning, noon and night until our ears begin to bleed of idealists and their ilk to be contemptible. high priests of the university elite dash ·· ...... · ...... , , ., ., ...... Ideal..... · ...... , , ..., ...... at the mere mention ofthose most hateful words. Everybody who's Indeed, it should be little wonder that I find about with reckless abandon, casting their ·· ...... , ...... · ...... , ...... , ...... anybody is all a-flutterover these confounded A.S. elections. Except the company of most carbon-based life 1ImI_ dullards favor upon tripe in the same manner a lady LSAT? for us. Personally, we couldn't care less. fonns to be bothersome. After all, Mencken .....ltthe .. of ill repute would carelessly cast her af­ And pray tell, why should we care? Does it really matter if John hit the bullseye when he wrote that "Moral­ trtls Ike. bad fections. And if they can go around doing Q. Weasel, Jane P. Hack or James T. Moron becomes the Commis­ ity is the theory that every human act must this. then I'm going to as well. dammit. Personal and Confidential Care for Women Since 1969 ... GRE? be either right or wrong, and that 99 percent beef bltlket. yet They're not the only orangutans who can TEST PREPARATION sionerofCrappy Programmingorthe Vice President for Protesting? of them are wrong." Mencken was no theM ...... swing through the zoo cage. Herb Schiller Why don't these poor, misguided saps save us all the trouble and slouch, that is to be sure. and his merry band of hegemones can . FREE PREGNANCY TESTING ARE YOU GOING TO BE PREPARED? spend this election doing important, collegiate things like drinking cads who dwell In We find ourselves dwelling in an arid a fantastic world traipse about campus cering forth their EARLY PREGNANCY TEST Courses for all three June exams begin in April: flne Irish whiskey and cruising forchicks?The problem is the typical landscape where the puppy-like idealists non\sensical ideology all they want, but (Immediate Test Results) A.S. chickenhead-eating geek is too dumb to know what's good for and other such fools parade about as if they of fallacy and you can bet the chicken ranch that others ABORTION TO 24 WEEKS [ GRE 4114 I [ LSAT 4/19 , [ GMAT 4/2. , him or her. It 's time for the intelligentsia, namely us, to let them delu""expect were a finely-trained precision marching have that right as well. And that includes (General or Local Anesthesia) know what's what. squad. Indeed, a quick glance at any recent metogollble misanthropic, embittered young punks like AS. elections are not simply inane - they are the boring results protest march will reveal an endless fonna­ away at their myself. OUVr~~lt~~f~ttLE of the clunky, inefficient democratic process at work. Maybe we tion of chimpanzees ga'dding about in their deceitful bltskat. How I wish that Mencken were around Compare PTP to other test preparation courses: Birkenstocks and bad hair dos. "Look at today. What adventures we would have Ina/rance. Hell"" Plans don't need any A.S. elections. Maybe what we do need is an elite MedI-CaI Aa:eoted • unlimited one- on-one tutormg • best price ruling body composed of students who can tell a hawk from a me! Look at me!" they seem to shout in ear-splitting tones together. We would waLk among the rabble, poking at Vila. M.... r card. Discover • only 12 students per class • no hidden fees handsaw. UCSD needs a benevolent dictatorship composed of the that would burst the ear drums of a stronger, wiser man. their shabby roclies and having a good laugh at their • up to date matenals • no audiotapes ''I'm in with the in-crowd, baby," these donkeys bellow, expense. "Immorality is the morality of those who are LA MESA creme de la creme of the university social order. We need a leader like braying jackasses yearning for another batch of hay. having a better time," Mencken would say. "Right you 8881 Fletcher Pkwy. who will leap up on a table screaming, "Cry havoc and let slip the (619) 698·6601 But I don 'I buy a word ofit - I'm much too smart for that. are, Mencken:'] would reply. "You sure did hit the nail Call PTP for more information or to reserve your seat. dogs of war." While this may be chaotic, it most certainly is not But students aren '\. Students wouldn't know good adv ice on the head with that one." boring. MISSION VIEJO NEWPORT BEACH Classes are closing fast so call today! if it walked up and bit them on the ass. Mencken is lost on But this can never be. As Mencken once remarked in 26400 Ll Al,HTwdd 4501 Birch St So when those sniveling AS. candidates come to prostrate them­ the great unwashed such as them. a Baltimore watering hole. "Pass the schnapps, sweet­ (714) 364·6800 (714) 851 · 1201 (61 9) 464-2627 , selves at your feet, simply do what we do-walk away from that rabble But still the words of Mencken ring true in these dark heart." Like all the other chimps, I am fated toend my days and cast your lot with the ruling elite. Cast your lot with us. times. "Nature abhors a moron," he notes, and to that end, in the same hazy stupor. fii/i7 FAMILY PLANNING ASSOCIATES M~DICAL GROUP Thursday, Aprill, J993 The UCSD Guardian 6 NEWS The Di reguardian Thursday, April 1, 1993 A}'7

IFe: Meeting of RETAIL CAREERS fraternities ends in •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• chaos,ennbannssnnent ContInued from Pee 0 Advance Into Managementl SYRACUSE ABROAD but it's not the itching I mind as ~ much as the swelling," Wilson said fo~rly t:In:aIt t:IIJ ...., tJc:. ,. .",...... ' • ...".., Spec"", ".,.,. TORREY'S afterward. III ",.."" ".",. ee..r... EIfIt:IJwIIa MIl ....App/"III:IJS IFe Advisor Paul De Wine de­ ."" 2l1li ...... ",. MIl IlrIIrMInf antlllflW $3 BllIlIII'n Salllsl clined comment on the incident, We Provide: WC"I C Looking FOI: saying only, 'These things happen, LA JOLLA MARRIOTT and besides, I'm sure the stains will • Structured Uanagement Development Programs • Peopl ••xcited by the fasl pac. 01 retailing, who will work the neceSlary nights and weekends. come out." with a prov.n record 01 .uccess. • Creative candidates with logicat and analytical But Meschoulam was still angl)' • Indlvidullly·tailored Developmenl Plan. to maxlmlz. your manag.m.nt potential . problem'lolving .kilil. ~ after the meeting. "It was disgust­ • Cuslomer·ori.nt.d individuals capable of teaching • Div.,.e Car.er Paths which provide continuing and motivating our associates 10 prov ide APPLICATIONS ARE STILL BEING ing, hurtful and thoroughly imma­ NCAA profeilional challenge •. high 1••• 11 01 cUltomer ..r.ic • . ture. I'll never be able to look at ACCEPTED FOR. .. • Competitive salary, h,,'th & dental ben.litl and • Compalitive Individuals, eager to Itrive for cranberries again without feeling a challenging workplace. promotional opportunities and financial rewards . FINAL FOUR • Opportunities Ihroughoulthe United Stales, ickened," he said • Bright, energetic, enthusiastic & self· motivated AFRICA • AUSTRALIA • CZECH REPUBLIC. Ellie MacDougal of People for team playe". ENGLAND • FRANCE • GERMANY • HUNGARY. the Ethical Treatment of Animals ISRAEL. ITALY. POLAND • SPAIN (PETA) said the organization plans 10 TVs & 2 BIG SCREENS We .., .. lJIMtNirt"" c.""". to petition for an investigation by April 23, ,.- "", Up T_, • Courses Taught in English and Host Country the San Diego District Attomey's ", ".". .... t c.t.1 Language Office. If r"" c-t ,., "" "" SdINMre. • SU Credit Drink Specials & Great Food ",...C..U.I • Field Trips/Traveling Seminars Open at NOON on SATURDA YS & SUNDAYS • Internships n:rTB;·.~m7 • Study For A Semester, A Year, Or A Summer Lisl 0' Fools 5 POOL TABLES· AIR HOCKEY· DARTS _ ...,.,..,."., c.. , ", '".,,,, • Home Or Apartment Placements AM",,".... # rlSX-SXSC FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE AVAILABLE Darrel Menthe 4240 LA JOLLA VILLAGE DR., LA JOLLA Management Trainee Herb Schiller call 1414 6220 c.. """,: Saturday &Sunday: Bam · 2pm Syracuse University Joe Watson Division of International Programs Abroad Tommy Tucker Monday • Friday: 7am· Spm CiaACIy ...._.... __.. _20_ '....- ...... 119 Euclid Avenue Leon Meschoulam ""' .... -~....,.. .. -~ Syracuse, NY 13244-4170 Jason Snell 1-800-235-3472 Kirt Wilson •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• Phillip Cole Mike Holmes Randolph Siwabessy Announces: Do you playa Matt Mayo' COLLEGE MONEY AVAILABLEIII wind Joanna Beam STUDENTS , if you are presently attending college or you IS GIVING AWAY MONEY! or Lottie Cohen plan to within a yeqr, let SMARTSTEPS locate your needed Get a grant of up to $500 to help out with any Patrick Carroll funds. percu~~ion It meets; TI-urs;days; academic project! U$ GRANT$ funds projects for Johnarhan Asch SMARTSTEPS utilizes a va st database of UNUSED 7 -{a p.tn. in Room GRANTS, SCHOLARSHIPS, and other funding sources all majors. If you have any questions, call us at i~trurnent? Gary Geiler B-202 Mandeville nationwide which matches your personal profile with 534-3917 or stop by our office (third floor of the Rich Toscano '------~or more info call 534-7921 ____...J them for a nominal processing fee of $99 (credit cards OK) , Price Center, room 305). Paul DeWine You will receive a U.S. Government Bond in an amount Matt Schnurer greater than your processing fee in the unlikely event WE ARE ACCEPTING PROPOSALS English Steve Dubb that you do not obtain fund ing. FOR SPRING 93 GRANTS Darlene Price ACT NOW! Do not hesitate to apply because of your DEADLINE FRIDAY APRIL 9 3 PM Buddhist academic record, parents' financial status, or any other Ely Rabani Class at a re ason. Mail a card to: DERGRADUATE SharonOh SMARTSTEPS ,. 4130 La Jolla Village Dr. #10761, La Jolla Traditional Chris Burnett CA 92037, to receive a free brochure and application kit. CHOLASTIC Jeff Debenham RANTS Chinese FAX: (619)558-STEP Bree Segal Temple Robin "Mr. Tact" Perez After Buddha entered Mark Rotenberg Nilvana more than 2,500 TAKE YOUR years ago, he left all of his James E. Collier Jr., III, esq. teachings to his disciples. Matthew S. Robinson ""ALLEY OFF THE In His teachings, Buddha offered humankind an understanding into Peter Irons ENDANGERED the nature and the purpose of human suffering and ways to to alleviate it once and for ai L The Hse Fang Int'I Zen Buddhist Robert Glenn SPECIES LIST! Temple. one of over 100 worldWide , is famous for its preservation and of the original spirit of Buddha's profound wisdom. 452·0524 between All Other Future Wards of Blockbuster This course will explore many topics relating to the fundamental The State and HE THOUGHT teachings of the Buddha . All levels of students are welcome. 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I you choose I large I ='~ ALAN SHAPIRO "".1i!IIIl' .__ -=-.= . ,.. -.pw ...... • (behind Goodyear) I Hal Fanllntemational Zen Buddhist Tenpe San 018,0, CA 92121 Not valid wi th any other I Not valid with .ny omfr I Not Vollid WIth l.I\y other I 4536 Park Blvd. .. 298-2800 sponsored by the UCSD Alumri Associlltion and rhe I 011.,. One pcr penon. offer. On< per penon. offer. On, per person." (619) 558-2436 Departmenr of SocioIOfl'I r.p.4/JO/93 I EXP.4/:xJ/93 .J up.4/:xJ/93 OPE N S APR I L 2 • most ears ----_ .. ------8 SPORTS The Disreguardian Thursday, April 1, 1993

ART ROTE

Kurt Bevacqua Is Alive and Well UCSD Baskelball Program Tritons Topple The beginning of the baseball season isjusta scant few days away, and already, Hapless Padres my lips are quivering in joyous anticipa­ BASfBAII • Mediocre tion. Who knows what fantastic finish Placed On NCAA Probation and stellar performances will etch them­ major leaguers no match IlASKEJRAII • A couple selves forever in our minds during the for tiel)' UCSD squad 1993 eason? Because just like Rod of innocent Twinkies land Carew's cintillating .388 batting aver­ the Tritons in hot water By Ray Kroc age in 1977 orBilly Ray Smith's inspired Tossing In His Grave pass rushing forthe mid-'80s San Diego By Jerry Tarkanlan It was supposed to be another Chargers, memorie live in the mind of Model Citizen spring training game for the San Di­ the true port fan forever. The news hit the UCSD athletic ego Padres, but the Tritons were too After all, who wouldn't remember the department like an atomic bla t yes­ tough to give this sorry collection of Steve Bartkowski-led Atlanta Falcons of terday - the UCSD basketball ballplayers any rest. By the time the 1980 or the zip Dan Pastorini used to put team, a highly-respected Divi ion carnage was over, UCSD had crushed on the baJl during his days with Houston ill squad, wa found in violation of this glorified version of the Las Ve­ Oilers? A port fan who doesn't treasure National Collegiate Athletic Asso­ gas Stars by a final score of 17-1. these memories is as si Uy as Broderick ciation (NCAA) rules. The Tritons Catcher Dominic Dirksen led the Perkin leading the league in batting av­ were immediately placed on two­ offen ive onslaught with a home run erage, as he did in 198 I. year probation, according to Ed off over-the-hill lefty Bruce Hurst. Without the memories that I hold dear, Foley, rules chairman of the NCAA. my interest in sport would be as short­ UCSD finds it elf in hot water The Scoreboard lived as Kurt Bevacqua's broadcasting with the NCAA for allegedly pay­ career with NBC. But just like the mighty ing its players. According to Coach Triton star Chris Moore was undone by his lust for snack food. UCSD 17 Bevacqua whose mighty bat gave the Tom Marshall, the charges tern The penalty the NCAA has lev- ituation. SAN DIEGO PADRES 1 hometown Padres a glimmer of hope from an unfortunate mi under tand­ ied against the basketball team is a "Get away from me! I'm wam- during the 1984 Fall Classic, my memo­ ing. fierce one. Besides the stigma of ing you. I'm not above killing, you ries are the logs that feed the fire of my "We were practicing one day, being placed on probation, UCSD know. Go on, get!" Moore said, a When Dirksen doubled off of Hurst fanaticism. and Chri Moore got really hungry. will 10 e it athletic scholar hip he brandished a Twinkie. an inning later, the dejected Padre I have memories, more than can be So he borrowed a couple of dollars and will be barred from appearing According to Marshall, the hurler could be seen wiping away a counted probably. I remember Mark 'The from me to go buy some Twinkies," on television for a year. worst part about being placed on manly tear. Bird" Fidrych taking the mound at the Marshall sa id. When informed that UCSD probation wi ll be the frequent Padre right-fielder Tony Gwynn tart of the 1976 All-Star Game (as if any According to Foley, it doesn't doesn 't offer cholarship or play games UCSD must now play was 0 upset by the loss, he hid in his man, woman or child doesn 't remember matter how minorthe violation was, on television, Foley responded, against UC Riverside. locker for an hour after the game. that Mid ummer Classic!). I vividly re­ "It only matters that the rule was "Oh, well. Urn. Never mind then." "I'm sorry, but Ijust don't like "I have no pity for those whiny, call Dan Issei snagging rebounds with the broken. We will not tolerate skull­ Moore, the Triton star this past Riverside," Marshall said. little bastards," chuckled Triton skip­ Denver Nuggets of the ABA. As a matter duggery of any sort," Foley added. year, refu ed to comment on the See TWINKlE, Page 10 per Lyle Yate . of fact, I remember a Bucky Dent si ngle I See SLAUGHTER, Page 17 ro~ft fieW~amean~g ~ssgameag~n~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ the Texa Rangers in 1979. And frankly this scare me si lly. My mind is so crammed with mean­ Bowling Is on a Turkey Hunt ingless sports trivia that any real knowl­ WHAT'S INSIDE: edge or wi dom ha long since been for­ BOWLING: The Triton pinsmen enter the '93 campaign with high hopes, rented shoes gotten. Who cou ldn 't forget Larry By Earl Anthony "I love bowli ng," said senior country, including their home McClutcheon 's touc hdown pa s in Super The Pride of Dublin Team Captain Ralph Barbieari. "I opener again t Valparaiso Univer­ WOMEN'S CHESS: The Bowl XIV? Well, I certainly can't, and With the opening frame of the would bowl all day if I could." sity at the Miramar Bowl-a-rama. patented Knight to King Four believe me, I've tried. But every time, I season just a few day away, the Barbieari, along with fellow se­ "Valparaiso is a Lutheran school maneuver spells victory for shutmyeyes, there 's Larry McClutcheon UCSD bowling team finds itself nior Chuck Delvechio, figure to in Indiana. And anyone who' ever the Tritons. Page 43 throwi ng that damned touchdown pass. daring to lead the Tritons in the '93 cam­ been around Lutheran knows that I find it more and more difficult to dream of a paign. According to DuMont, these if there' one thing they do well, MEN'S CABER TOSS: The functio n in the real world - the lines championship two wily veterans are viable All­ it's bowl," said DuMont. between fantasy and reality have become eason. Forthe American candidate. "Well, that and make smoked squad fared poorly on the road increa ingly blurred. For in tance, my first time in the "I've never seen a man pick Lip cheese ," he added. again t Glasgow College. friend will be talking about democratic program's sto­ the seven-ten split th e way But if the Tritons can overcome Page 9 reform in Rus ia, and I'll begin uncon­ ried history, Delvechio does," claims DuMont. the difficult schedule, they could trollably pouting off the batting aver­ the Triton "And Barbieari, well everyone finally be hoisting a championship MEN'S DROWNING: In an ages for the expan ion 1969 Seattle Pi­ pinsmen find knows that he plays this game like banner in the Triton gym. The impressive season finale six lots. When I'm on a date with my girl­ them elves a Zen master," the coach added. memories of last year's second ­ Tritons managed to drown. friend, I have to resi t the temptation to ranked as the DuMont is equally pleased with place finish in the NCAA touma­ tell her about Game Four of the 1988 number-two the young guns on his quad, mo t mentstill haunts these tournaments. PageS American League Champion hip Serie , team in the notably freshman phenom Bruno "We had it won, the champion- where the A' completed a four game country. Fiske. Fiske, a five-foot six-inch, hip was aJl ours," recalls Barbieari. sweep of the Red Sox with a convincing Head Coach Bob "Spare King" 270-pound bowler out of Torrey "And then we realized we forgotto hutout. A I remember, Dennis Eckersley DuMont has been putting his vet­ Pines High School, will have an leave a deposit for our bowling was brought in to finish the game, and eran squad through a rigorous pring immediate impact on the Triton shoes. That threw off our whole he .... training in hopes of snagging a squad. rhythm . And drink ing all that beer Damn. I'm doing it again. hotly-contested NCAA champion­ "He's a natural athlete," aid before the tenth frame probably Don't you see? I want to be normal ship banner in bowling. DuMont. "And you should see that didn 't help either." again. I'm reaching out to you for help, in Right now, the Tritons are con­ boy pick up them turkeys!" This year, however, the Tritons the same way that Sonny Liston reached ducting their notorious two-a-day Although gutter balls may be plan to be sipping champagne when out for help after he was knocked down practice , where the pinsmen bowl few and far between for the Tritons the tenth frame rolls around. And if by Cassius Clay in their second encounter two games in the morning and two this year, the pin men wi \1 cer­ Bob DuMont has his way, bowling for the heavyweight championship. I'm games at night. But you won 't find tainly get no help from the sched­ will remain the unquestioned jewel reaching out exactly like that. Oh God, I the plucky Triton squad complain­ ule-makers. The Tritons will play in the UCSD athletic department 's just want the suffering to stop .... ing. one of the toughest schedules in the crown. 111e Week Ahead The Headline Matchup: Women's Skeetshooting YS. San Diego State, Friday at 5 p.m., Muir Reid. Other Games: Men's Figure Skating vs. Soviet National Team, at UTC, Monday. Women 's Mud Wrestling vs. BYU, at Les Girls, Saturday at 8 p.m. and again at 10 p.m.