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Purchase a Nicer, Printable PDF of This Issue. Or Nicest of All, Subscribe To Mel says, “This is swell! But it’s not ideal—it’s a free, grainy PDF.” Attain your ideals! Purchase a nicer, printable PDF of this issue. Or nicest of all, subscribe to the paper version of the Annals of Improbable Research (six issues per year, delivered to your doorstep!). To purchase pretty PDFs, or to subscribe to splendid paper, go to http://www.improbable.com/magazine/ ANNALS OF Bezoars, Bezoars, Bezoars Hair, Hair, Hair and more more more! Special Issue! Harry Potter and the Exploding Toads 09 > www.improbable.com September-October 2005 | Annals of Improbable Research|1 0 7447 0 8 8921 2 SEPTEMBER |OCTOBER 2005 $6.50 US|$9.50 CAN Annals of Improbable Research ISSN 1079-5146 © 2005 Annals of Improbable Research AIR, P.O. Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238, USA "Ig" and the tumbled thinker logo are both reg. U.S. Pat. & Tm. Off. 617-491-4437 FAX: 617-661-0927 www.improbable.com [email protected] EDITORIAL: [email protected] AIRheads Co-founders Psychology Editor Chemical Analysis Circulation Marc Abrahams Robin Abrahams Jo Rita Jordan Jane Coughlin Alexander Kohn Art Director Contributing Editors Circulation (Counter-clockwise) Editor Peaco Todd Stephen Drew, Karen Hopkin, James Mahoney Marc Abrahams [email protected] Alice Kaswell, Nick Kim, Webmaster [email protected] www.peacotoons.com Richard Lederer, Steve Nadis Amy Gorin Commutative Editor Art and Design Research Researchers [email protected] Stanley Eigen Lois Malone/Rich & Famous Kristine Danowski, Gary Dryfoos, Proofing Northeastern U., Graphics Tom Gill, Jessica Girard, Mary Susan Welstead et al. [email protected] Kroner, Wendy Mattson, Tom Research Librarians Roberts, Tom Ulrich Associative Editor Chana Lajcher, Judy Spahr Mark Dionne Kurzweil Ed'l Systs “When all other contingencies fail, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.”—Sherlock Holmes Other Einsteins (Part 5) by A.S. Kaswell, with Jessica Girard, AIR staff As reported in Parts 1, 2, 3 and 4 of this series, people say “There is only one Einstein,” but of course that is not so. In this, the official, “Einstein Year,” when everyone celebrates Albert Einstein, we are giving happy nods also to some of the other Einsteins. Einstein on Performance Appraisal Walter O. Einstein is an authority on performance appraisal. One of his best-known studies is: “Leadership and Outcomes of Performance Appraisal Processes,” David A. Waldman, Bernard M. Bass and Walter O. Einstein, Journal of Occupational Psychology, vol. 60 no. 3, September 1987, pp. 177- 86. Einstein is a professor of management at Southeastern Massachusetts University (which has since become University of Massachusetts Dartmouth, thanks to a restructuring). Einstein’s Small-Bowel Experiment David M. Einstein of The Cleveland Clinic Foundation in Cleveland, Ohio, is immersed in knowledge of the small bowel. Einstein fans recommend especially his report: “Comparison of Two Barium Suspensions for Dedicated Small-Bowel Series,” Jon C. Davidson, David M. Einstein, et al., American Journal of Roentgenology, vol. 172, no. 2, February 1999, pp. 379-82. More to Come Previously in this series, we examined the following Einsteins. Part 1 -- M.E. Einstein (pork carcass composition) Part 2 -- Rosemarie Einstein (cannabis) Part 3 -- Danielle A. Einstein (magical thinking and perfectionism) Part 4 -- Hans E. Einstein (respiratory ailments) and H.E. Einstein (electric batteries) In the next, and concluding installment, we will lovingly look at still other Einsteins. 2|Annals of Improbable Research |September-October 2005 www.improbable.com www.improbable.com September-October 2005 | Annals of Improbable Research|1 Contents The features marked with a star (*) are based entirely on material taken straight from standard research (and other Official and Therefore Always Correct) literature. Many of the other articles are genuine, too, but we don’t know which ones. ® Special Section: Harry Potter and 30 Bends on the Learning Curve -- Richard the Exploding Toads Lederer 4 Pottering About Bezoars *-- Stephen Drew 31 CARTOON: “Another Advance in 5 Selected Works of Harry Potter*-- Alice Shirrell Veterinary Science” -- Nick Kim Kaswell 31 Back Issues 8 Potter: Hairy*-- Stephen Drew ibc Unclassified Ads 18 Exploding Toads: The Storied Remains*-- Mark benecke, C.W. Moeliker, Richard Wassersug, Marc Abrahams On the Front Cover A Harry Potter book attracts interest. Photo: A.S. Kaswell Improbable Research ifc Other Einsteins* (Part 5) -- A.S. Kaswell, with Jessica Girard On the Back Cover Sign posted on the grounds of the American 9 The Provocations of Biking *-- D.L.N Travasco Academy of Arts and Sciences of the 2004 on the 10 How to Write a Love Letter -- Joshua Lederman occasion of their induction ceremony. Photo: A.S. 24 Pop-Up Medical Thermometer Woes -- Stephen Drew Kaswell. Recommended Research* Coming Events 7 May We Recommend* -- Stephen Drew (see WWW.IMPROBABLE.COM for details of these and other events) 15 AIRhead Medical Review* -- Bertha Vanatian Cascadiacon, Seattle, WA -- SEPT 1-5, 2005 16 AIRhead Research Review* -- Dirk Manley 17 Scientists Now Know* -- Olph DeShaies Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony -- 23 Soft is Hard* -- Alice Shirrell Kaswell, G. Neil Martin, OCT 6, 2005 and Bissell Mango Ig Informal Lectures -- OCT 8, 2005 25 Boys Will Be Boys* -- Katherine Lee 26 Icky Cutesy Research Review* -- Tige Lament Quebec -- NOV, 2005 Every Weekday News & Notes Read something new and improbable every 2 AIR Vents (letters from our readers) weekday on the Improbable Research blog, on our 7 AIR books web site: WWW.IMPROBABLE.COM 12 Puzzling Solutions -- Emil Filterbag 27 Ig Nobel Invitation Annals of 28 HMO-NO News: Natural Healing Incentives! Improbable Research The journal of record 29 Socially Scientific --Robin Abrahams for inflated research and personalities Volume 11, Number 5 • September/October 2005 29 Teachers’ Guide ISSN 1079-5146 2|Annals of Improbable Research |September-October 2005 www.improbable.com www.improbable.com September-October 2005 | Annals of Improbable Research|1 six-pack rings occur when the creature makes the AIR Vents error of using the ring as a thoroughfare (en route to a Exhalations from tasty snack)! our readers John C. Bullas & Michael O’Leary NOTE: The opinions expressed Southampton, U.K. here represent the opinions of the authors and do not Colonoscopy necessarily represent the Celebrant opinions of those who hold Maybe I’m unusual, I found other opinions. mine fascinating. I was able to watch it all on the video monitor. The journey Hedgehog + Ice through the colon looked Cream + Rings like a science fiction movie Parallel Rorschach Test of the view from a miniature Question Six-pack rings, unproven submarine. It moved through Advances: Snails as a hazard to animals in a a long tunnel of white walls and Space I was shocked to see Arnold recent article (“The 6-Pack with strange ripples, like A copy of the July/August Bishop-Wise’s letter (AIR 2005 issue was sent to me by Vents 11:4) about the a friend who is familiar with photograph he found in the my work. study of his late wife, Arlene Bishop-Wise, the revered The cover picture of the snail “Intellectual Mistress of the pulling the DVDs (SNAP Rorschach Test.” He questions -- SNAil-based data transfer whether Arlene Bishop-Wise’s Protocol.) was LOL funny famous ink blot “is in fact a specifically because I’d photograph” and says, “To me recently published a paper it looks like a photograph of in Nature (the cover article two elderly women.” Indeed in their September 2, 2004 issue) dealing with the general topic of “inscribed matter” communications. (In a nutshell it explains that the message- in-a-bottle idea of sending physical objects across space Ring Fishing Experiment,” caverns measureless to man. is highly energy efficient, and AIR 11:3), could be put in I mentioned to the physician we should search for artifacts the shade by the seemingly how clean everything looked: in the solar system now.) innocuous packaging of the He said ‘twas not his doing, ‘ice cream’ (sic, to our way of but mine...it took me a Please relay to the authors my thinking) concoction called a moment to understand what he hearty applause and delight McFlurry, which is advertised meant. at their SNAP system and experiments. in connection with the slogan I asked for a video recording; “lovin’ it!” none was available, but I was What’s funny is that though Look at this photograph. The given a still photograph of my the paper IS hilarious, it does poor hedgehog (Erinaceus inside, signed by the physician, raise the question of efficiency europaeus) which stumbled which I have proudly kept. My for those who would read past upon a six-pack ring was only regret was that I had not the jocularity and examine the clearly NOT “lovin’ it!” before refreshed my mental picture of underlying science. So in this the two-stage rescue process the geography of the intestine, respect, the SNAP article is a -- which required the removal for the physician told me the perfect example of your motto: of the paper cup, then the names of the scenic spots as “laugh then think.” removal (using a knife) of the we went through them. Prof. Christopher Rose rigid plastic splatter guard -- Leonard Finegold Associate Director, Rutgers returned it to the wild. Physics Department WINLAB I would, in passing, also Drexel University Piscataway, NJ venture that most “kills” by Philadelphia, PA 2|Annals of Improbable Research |September-October 2005 www.improbable.com www.improbable.com September-October 2005 | Annals of Improbable Research|3 it does. Arlene and I Law of the ink blot -- with Cora A Guide to the Stars were lifelong friends. Ronald A. May, Little Rock, AR and me posing as, well, * Nobel Laureate Library & Info Sciences I still consider her my blots.
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