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Daily Bull 10-03-08.Indd AILY BUL The Daily Bull is probably not suitable for those under age 18 and should not be taken seriously... like anyone who doesn’t look like a tramp! DFriday, Technober 3, 2008 L “I thoroughly disapprove of A Ravin’ Pie Nathan Wonders: Who is this Some Guy? duels. If a man should challenge Brought to you by Nathan “Invincible” Miller me, I would take him kindly By Nathan “Invincible” Miller ~ Daily Bull and forgivingly by the hand and A long, long time ago… And can we get some Daft Punk on Seriously, who does this character somewhere close to the age I act, lead him to a quiet place and kill him.” I can still remember how the music used this show? think he is? Some Guy? Does he but that changes depending on ~Mark Twain to make me high realize what he’s done? I’ll tell you how much candy I have eaten or A Case For the And I knew if I had my chance Well I know that you like Fatboy Slim what he’s done as the one and only times I have fallen down in a given That I could make the whole club Cause I saw you groovin’ in the gym. Nathan Invincible: he’s copied my day. Nudists dance I heard some smooth Praise You style and has ON PURPOSELY ru- By some guy who is not Nathan And maybe they’d be ravin’ for a Or Weapon of Choice in there too. ined a perfectly good Miller This year they tried to Invincible but has a very similar while. Time that I have make it so that I writing style and also believes all I was a lonely raver into Fluke been hoping wouldn’t have the same things but definitely isn’t But those big beats made me shiver Or Eat Static with their sick crazy ass for all se- as many the same person ~ Daily Bull With every set that they’d deliver hooks mester. b e c a u s e As Americans (most of us Hot girls all on my lap But the music was not so cute apparently anyway), we are a people I hadn’t even started yet. The day, the ravers jived. Oh, you don’t people didn’t of prejudices and hatred. know what a Mill- like seeing my Yeah, don’t deny it, I’m sure I’m not so certain I’m alive [chorus] er Time is? Basically, articles all the time. you have some sort of in- When I jumped for that last epic dive whenever a Bull mem- Yeah right, they’re just tolerance towards some But I know the music was so fly ber manages to be the jealous. So they decid- sort of people. People The day, the ravers jived. Now for an hour we’ve been on the only one with articles or ed to hire some hench- who wear huge honking floor it is a special occasion, men named Some Guy sunglasses, owners of an- [chorus:] The bass bumpin’ me down to the they get the whole Bull to steal my thunder. noying little dogs, and good So let’s dance to the music and fun core, to themselves. Over Those terrorists. They’ll natured people strapped Kept on dancing all the evening Exactly how I like it man. the past 2 years I’ve never get away with with explosives are all the Til my power was gone. When I jumped around to House of gotten so many Daily He could be anybody... this. I’ll find this Some type of people that are And them good old Djs kept on playin’ Pain, Millers, Miller Times, and Invinci-bulls Guy and when I do, I’ll make him time and time again looked my songs The people said I was insane that I have lost track. I think it’s pay. down upon by today’s so- Singin’, “This’ll go out to everyone” With the synth going straight to my ciety. There is one group of “This’ll go out to everyone…” brain... people, however, that many often ignore: the Nudists. Did you dance to that great song, Oh, and while the DJ spun around Will you listen to Amon Tobin I slipped him a cool album. Now I’m not saying that you After their sweet song comes on? “The Klaxons!” he exclaimed, should go hating on the And do you love DJ Tiesto, “My favorite, I must say!” nudists just because I re- Can DJ Kool clear your throat, minded you of them. “But ...see Don McLean I think not! on back Some Guy, I really despise people who don’t wanna Homecoming and Hobo Parades? wear clothes it’s so unnatu- Sounds like the perfect excuse to skip class! ...see Nudes v. Prudes on back ...Don McLean I think not! from front The day, the ravers jived. ...Nudes v. Prudes from front And while the strobes flashed bright ral and beastly and what if they’re fat Realize Your Future onto me, [chorus] and gross and it’s unhealthy etc. etc. The jammers danced so crazily, etc.” Save your illogical blithering for The beats fell so melodically Oh and there was this song called another day. Or for people who re- The day, the ravers jived. Sandstorm, ally do deserve being looked down Playing it there, it was the norm upon, like midgets and pedophiles. [chorus] Cause it was the best my friends. So come on, Aphex Twin or Blue Anywho, I’ve got an argument to It’s time to realize your future. At Plexus Corp., you will work in an envi- Holy moly Rob Dougan is smokin’ Man Group! make to prove to you that Nudists ronment that fosters creativity, resourcefulness and teamwork. You will use The Chemical Bros. continue With your sweet infectious loops aren’t some sort of hippie freakers leading edge technology and have the opportunity to see your ideas become bumpin’ Play it loud for the ladies and anymore, and are perfectly accept- reality. Work closely with employees throughout the world as you team I’m not sure if I can last… gents… able people. After all, you never to provide quality products and services to many Fortune 500 companies. But more beats came on so fast know who may be an aspiring Nud- These customers turn to Plexus for product design, state-of-the-art proto- They hit me like an atomic blast Oh, and as I jammed to Underworld ist, just waiting to come out from typing, testing through volume manufacturing and higher-level assembly With the wall flowers, fallin’ down, My glow stick trails twisted and behind those large hedgerows they - the very services that make us unique. Whether our customers require one as I past. curled. recently planted. service or all of them, we are driven to make every idea a reality. Realize No raver in the place your future by visiting our website at www.plexus.com today! Now the sweat filled air was sweet Could keep up with my rad pace. Pros. Being a Nudist is probably perfume And as the lights shined through the the most natural thing you can do Realize your future and apply at www.plexus.com today! Of the hundred bodies in the room thick haze outside of eating, breathing, sleep- Plexus is an Equal Opportunity/Affirmative Action Employer. The DJ turned it up From the disco-fever days ing, having sex, being born and dy- Since we hadn’t yet had enough! I thought, “This is one stupendous ing, many of which you do naked um cleaners. Gosh, wouldn’t it be ets. Penis Envy. Boob envy? Being Cause the clubbers tried to take the rave” already. Therefore, in some sense, fun to drive a Segway in the nude? crowded in a subway. Uncom- stage The day, the ravers jived. we’re all part nudists anyway. Un- I’d bet my life on it. fortable sand chaffing. Hot coffee. A new chapter they’d turn the page less you never take your clothes off, Power tools. Paper shredders. Any- The cool techno was all the rage [chorus] which is just gross. Plus, if everyone were cool with oth- thing pointy. Leather car seats. Mad er people being naked all over the dogs. And many other potentially I met a girl who danced the blues Oftentimes, though, wearing any place, people who like to have the painful things. Daily Bull And who liked some old school clothes can be gross as well. Imag- perfect tan with no tan lines wouldn’t EDITOR IN COMPOSITION I’M SO HUNGRY Moby too ine yourself sweating and stinking in have to worry anymore. You could But don’t let all those nasty things CHIEF EDITOR I’d eat my holey Nathan “Invincible” Miller Tim Kotula shoe. But she said the show’s almost nothing more than jeans and a t-shirt plop down just about anywhere and blind you from the truth, which is that FACULTY ALMOST WON AT BUSINESS soak up all the sun you could ever being a Nudist should be a lot more ADVISOR HIDE & GO SEEK MANAGER done… on a hot summer’s day. Your average David Olson is the man. Steve Fossett Caitlyn Pierce I descended to the dance floor guy will probably take their shirt off, want, never having to scurry for a popular and acceptable way of life. Nathan “Invincible” Miller, Tim Kotula, John Earnest, Caitlyn Pierce, Liz Fujita, Jeremy Mr.
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