Breaking Free 1

Breaking Free:

The therapeutic needs of former members of destructive religious cults

A Research Paper

Presented to

The Faculty of the Adler Graduate School

______

In Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for

the Degree of Master of Arts in

Adlerian Counseling and Psychotherapy

______

By:

Amanda Luedtke

April 2010

Breaking Free 2

Acknowledgements

I would like to extend my heartfelt appreciation for the staff and faculty at Adler for their

continuing support and encouragement during my program. This quest that I have been

on has been a long and exciting process and I am grateful for the time that I have had

here. A special thanks to Dan Haugen and Herb Laube for their assistance with this

paper.

Isaac and Brenna: You guys are my heart and soul. Thank you for your patience and understanding while many nights were spent without me. Turns out that Dad really IS a

good cook, right? I love you both so much, and you little monkeys were truly my

motivation for making this goal become a reality.

Ryan: Words fail me…for the first time ever! You are the safest place for me and the

brightest part of who I am. Your constant support and never-ending patience have

enabled me to do this. I love you.

Breaking Free 3

Outline

Introduction

Method

Literature Review

Attraction to cults

Perceived benefits

Requirements and cost of association

How leaders maintain control

Disaffiliation

Therapeutic needs

Conclusion

References

Breaking Free 4

Abstract

Destructive religious cults have become a source of great concern and speculation.

Each year, people leave their homes and families to accept lives that are governed by

tyrannical control, extreme isolation and widespread fear in order to find meaning and a place to belong. Many cult members experience this environment over an extended period of time and have great difficulty acclimating themselves when they are no longer

a part of the faction. The focus of this Master’s Project is to explore the therapy needs of

former members of destructive religious cults as they attempt to overcome the fear and

isolation that have become an integral component of their lives.

Breaking Free 5

Introduction

"It was curious to think that the sky was the same for everybody, in Eurasia

or Eastasia as well as here. And the people under the sky were also very

much the same--everywhere, all over the world, hundreds or thousands of

millions of people just like this, people ignorant of one another's existence,

held apart by walls of hatred and lies, and yet almost exactly the same--

people who had never learned to think but were storing up in their hearts and

bellies and muscles the power that would one day overturn the world."

- George Orwell, 1984, Book 1, Chapter 10

Nineteen Eighty-Four is a fictional novel written by George Orwell in 1949 which depicts a futuristic, repressive and totalitarian regime that controls the population of a country called Oceania. The characters in the story are required to eliminate their own belief system and actively endorse thought conformity. The story develops the term

“doublespeak” which refers to the ability to have two contradictory thoughts or ideas within one’s beliefs at the same time. Orwell conveys an understanding of the chaos and confusion that occurs when individuals begin to lose their ability to think critically and begin to accept without question ideas that are presented to them, regardless of any cognitive dissonance that is experienced.

Orwell’s depiction of pervasive government control and loss of individual uniqueness, while fiction, bears a striking resemblance to unconventional religious groups that continue to materialize within our modern culture. Time and again we have Breaking Free 6

seen individuals embrace entirely new beliefs and practices while handing themselves

over to the control of a leader who manipulates and dominates. These groups are most

often secretive and isolated, offering the leaders’ free reign over the hearts and minds of those immersed in their theologies. The isolation offers ideal timing to propagandize the participants with fearful beliefs about the outside world and their former lives in order to perpetuate the mission of the group.

In recent years, there has been an increase in literature and media coverage regarding destructive religious cults. The members of these cults appear to have lost all sense of themselves and their own value system, embracing the conditions and requirements upon the promise of life fulfillment. Outside interest in these groups is intensified as some members behave in caustic, violent ways that leave the general public filled with confusion and alarm.

There are many different types of cults, some focusing on religion, others on political movements. Hassan (1990) asserts that cults have individual differences but there are universal themes that are present within most cults. He refers to the “group’s teachings, social life, and beliefs that…determine a member’s daily life” (p.78). The groups are most often taught that their own doctrine is reality which is reduced to two basic poles of black or white. Members consider themselves an elite group, and the needs of the group outweigh the needs or thoughts of the individual members (Hassan,

1990).

One of the most well-known religious cults of our time is the group called The

People’s Temple which was led by charismatic leader Jim Jones in the 1970’s. He and his followers established a commune-like village in Guyana, South America, referred to Breaking Free 7 as “Jonestown”. On November 18, 1978, the group members voluntarily drank Kool-Aid laced with cyanide. As a result, 918 members, both children and adults, died via poison and gunshots based on the belief that they were soon to be attacked and removed to a form of captivity by the American government.

The victims of the tragedy in Jonestown had convinced themselves that they were among the chosen few and were following the will of God. Most had lost all desire or ability to make choices for themselves and accepted the group requirements. Most members of the group did not question any part of Jones’ teachings or directions even though his actions were in direct violation of what many would consider basic rules of conduct. Deborah Layton, a former member of the People’s Temple, affirms that when “our questions are not allowed and our doubts punished, when contacts and friends outside the organization are censored…when our hearts ache knowing that friendships will be forbidden if we ever leave, we are in danger” (1998, p.299). She asserts that merely staying in a group to avoid the loss one would suffer by leaving indicates that the individual is involved with a cult.

Layton escaped from South America several months before the mass suicide.

Her concerns about the group led her to adamantly crusade for the United States to investigate the group which still had control of her brother and elderly mother. In her book, Seductive Poison (1998), Deborah recounts the initial days following the revelations of Jonestown.

We were unprepared for the self-righteous scrutiny of the media that would

turn us into specimens of feverish interest. In a flash, our families would no Breaking Free 8

longer be just citizens, neighbors or friends. No longer inconspicuous faces

in the grocery store. We would be the objects of fascination for a prurient

American public. We would symbolize what others were afraid to

acknowledge and observe within themselves, and so they would soon

condemn us (p.295).

Layton’s words resonate within a society that demands answers along with reasons and finds it incomprehensible that innocent children would die because of ideological beliefs. Society sees these members as former participants of their own lives; as previous accountants, students, volunteers and teachers who have been persuaded to hurt, kill, steal and commit atrocious acts in the name of God.

In recent decades, approximately 5,000 cults containing close to two million members have been identified as operating within the United States (Lottick, 2008). It becomes difficult to differentiate the cults which are destructive from the religious groups that merely refrain from mainstream rules and procedures. An important distinction to make is that there are specific characteristics that can determine the benign from the destructive. According to Lottick (2008), destructive cults are defined as

“groups which violate the rights of their members, harm them through abusive techniques of mind control, and distinguish themselves from normal social or religious groups by subjecting their members to physical, mental, or financial deprivation or deception to keep them in the group” (p.2).

A prime example of the mind control that is used within these groups can be seen within The Family, headed by Charles Manson in the 1960’s. This group lived as Breaking Free 9

a quasi-commune in Northern California who considered Manson to be their principal

leader/father figure. Manson predicted “race wars” and an ensuing apocalypse, during

which his group would rise to lead the people who remained. Upon his direction, several

members of his family attacked two homes and subsequently killed nine people in an

effort to begin the catastrophic apocalypse.

Vincent Buglisoi, prosecuting attorney in the Mason case, spent over a year in

preparation and trial in hopes of a guilty verdict for Manson and his group for the

murders committed. In a recent interview in Newsweek Magazine, Bugliosi spoke about

his recollections of the trial and of Manson.

“Most mass murderers have turned out to be of rather low intellect—drifters,

loners. Basically, they committed the murders for one reason only: to satisfy

their own homicidal tendencies. Manson not only is very bright—but as

misdirected as his violence was, his murders were revolutionary, political, and

therein lies his main appeal to those on the fringes. The other thing that has

separated him is the fact that all these other mass murderers committed the

murders by themselves. Manson, on the other hand, was pulling strings and

getting people to go out and kill strangers at his command without asking any

questions. And that makes him more frightening to people” (Mosely, 2009).

Manson’s ability to convince a young track star, a member of the church choir

and a former homecoming princess to be involved with the brutal murders of nine

people seems absurd. He was, however, the mastermind behind the shattering evening in which these seemingly bright and articulate members of his “family” left their victims Breaking Free 10

with 169 stab wounds and seven gunshot wounds. His control and influence over the

members of his group is of unbelievable magnitude.

In her book entitled “The Rhetoric of Religious Cults” (2005) Annabelle Mooney

establishes characteristics that would identify a cultic group. She asserts that cults

“…express an ideology different than that of dominant theology…groups of people

brought together by beliefs and ideas…centralized authority…and a source of identity

for the individual” (p.325). However, these characteristics do not differentiate destructive groups from many mainstream religious groups that are predominant today.

It is vitally important to acknowledge that the three main characteristics of a cult are 1.)

Members are required to focus their work on energy for the self-serving goals of the group which promote their “true mission”; 2.) The accurate motives and intentions are intentionally concealed from all members other than the “inner circle”; and 3.) The leadership of the group is authoritarian and rigid as it controls group requirements.

Richardson (1993) asserts that many definitions of a cult are emotionally charged and full of personal opinions. He offers what he calls a “neutral” description by using rhetoric such as “Strong authoritarian leadership…separatist group…oriented towards producing powerful subjective experiences” (p. 353). He also recommends using the term emergent religion as a way to remove all stereotypes and labels.

For the purpose of this paper, cults will be defined as “a group or movement exhibiting a great or excessive devotion or dedication to some person, idea or thing and employing unethically manipulative techniques of persuasion and control…designed to advance the goals of the group’s leaders, to the actual or possible detriment of members, their families or the community” (West & Langone, 1986, pp.119-120). Breaking Free 11

The leaders of destructive religious cults will stop at nothing to ensure the devotion and commitment of their members. The culture of fear and isolation breeds a sense of dedication and obligation among members of religious groups. Members lose all sense of who they are and of their basic core values and belief systems. It is critical to understand how individuals transform their thinking and behaviors in order to conform to their new surroundings. This understanding, in turn, helps one to understand the difficulties members experiences when they attempt to return to the person they once were.

Method

Articles that clearly define the problems that arise for individuals who are a part of destructive religious cults will be reviewed along with articles that describe the therapeutic knowledge that is currently available to help those individuals. Literature will be reviewed that emphasizes the therapeutic methods that can be used to help members of cults as they seek to re-establish themselves into mainstream society.

Attraction to cults

Most destructive religious cults do not initially appear to be negative and initially appear as authentic in the way they conduct themselves and convey their message.

Some destructive religious cults may even pose as community groups or service organizations that appear to promote self-esteem or personal sacrifice (Hunter, 1998).

The spiritual leaders of these groups often go on speaking tours and even host television shows (Goldman, 2006) Some may even sponsor spiritual retreats or conferences that promote their mission and doctrine. Many religious cults are a part of a Breaking Free 12 continuum of religious organizations and function in ways very similar to established mainstream religious groups.

According to Lottick (2008), destructive religious cults can “create peculiarly distorted, un-reflected upon, short-cut, only sometimes concrete thoughts in their recruits …It appears to the observer that these recruits have lost their higher powers of empathy, insight and judgment” (p.13). An outside observer may be confused by sudden behavior changes and see a new person replacing the friend or family member they once knew. According to Jenkinson (2008), there is much evidence to support the claim that members of destructive religious cults undergo a radical personality change, which can happen very rapidly (Jenkinson, 2008). As members begin to take on the identity of the group, their own characteristics and identity begin to diminish. They are excited about developing newer and “better” parts of themselves while moving away from the injured or broken person they had become.

Love-bombing

Most destructive religious cults appear benign and do not seem to initially arouse skepticism or concern, thus opening the door for curious seekers. Cult involvement is a gradual process that starts with an individual’s interest in a specific group and is quickly followed by “love-bombing”. Love-bombing is a deliberate and active show of care and friendship designed to lure an individual into a group. These actions could consist of anything from flattery and attention to physical affection or seduction (Langone, 1994).

A former member of the Unification Church, a religious movement founded by

Sun Muyung Moon in the early 1950’s, recollects attending a conference on ESP (extra- sensory perception) and speaking with some of the staff there. He had initially attended Breaking Free 13 the conference out of curiosity, but the staff and keynote speaker seemed very interested in him and his questions while expressing support for his curiosity, something that he had not felt for some time. The conference was quickly followed by a dinner and a higher level of involvement in the group. The member was secure in his commitment to the group before their affiliation with the Unification Church was made known to him

(Galanter, 1999).

People in general are drawn to those who appear to live out their strong beliefs and convictions. Cult members can appear to be driven by their fervor and this is very attractive to observers. Recruiters are often warm and friendly and strive to carve out a

“special” place for a new recruit while promoting participation and purpose. Their invitation offers a secure place to belong, away from all the stress of life and this invitation may mark the first time that an individual has felt special or safe. As in the case of the former member of the Unification Church, true motives and goals of the group are often not revealed until the member has completely committed his or her life and there does not seem to be any way out.

Charismatic Leadership

New recruits may hear stories about how the leader has forever changed people or healed the sick and dying or given other members complete direction and purpose in their lives. Many members claim to have seen events such as healings or supernatural experiences which reaffirm the power of the leader. These stories, in addition to the charisma that many leaders possess, offer an almost magnetic pull for the new recruit.

In his book A Place Called Waco: A Survivors Story (1999), David Thibodeau recounts his experiences as a member of “The Branch Davidians”, a group which was Breaking Free 14

led by infamous leader David Koresh. This faction, a splinter group originating from

Seventh-Day Adventists, had been under the leadership of Koresh since the early

1980’s. The group, who lived quietly in Texas, lived in a commune-like setting and

followed the apocalyptic teachings of Koresh. Thibodeau recalls meeting Koresh for the

first time and reflected upon his initial attraction to Koresh.

“Looking back, I ask myself…How could someone like me, who had shown little

interest in belief or Scripture…become so entranced by the Bible? The key was

David himself. He first touched me as a fellow musician and a warm friend and I

was taken by his deep sincerity and natural authority (p.23).”

To Thibodeau, Koresh exemplified a person of purpose: his music, his teachings,

his people. Koresh had a magnetic attraction and as Thibodeau considered joining with

the group, he asked himself “What have I got to lose?” (p.24). Thibodeau was one of

only a few members who survived the tragedy that occurred in Waco on April 19, 1993.

Seventy-four people, men, women and children, lost their lives after a nearly seven

week siege with the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms. These members of the

group gave up their lives and families to live, work and learn under the leadership of

Koresh.

A search for spiritual meaning

According to a report by the Vatican (1986), cult members are often on a search

for transcendence and a “God-inspired motivation to seek something beyond the

obvious, the immediate, the familiar, the controllable, and the material to find an answer

to the ultimate questions of life and to believe in something which can change one’s life

in a significant way” (p.6). People of all backgrounds desire a place to belong and a way Breaking Free 15 to find answers to their questions. Many religious cults appear to be the answer that members are looking for because these groups attempt to fill a spiritual void. Langone

(1994) also offers an answer to the questions of why so many turn to cultic groups to find answers in their lives. “Cults offer to fulfill commonly experienced human needs for understanding, certainty, and self-esteem. They provide an absolutist triad of black- and-white answers to life’s problems, a refusal to entertain doubt about those answers and a promise of being superior to everyone outside the group (p. 1)”.

Those at risk

Groups of people who are the most vulnerable to cult recruitment are those who are actively looking for a place to belong, those who are disillusioned with society and government and those who may be at an “in-between” place in life. Individuals experiencing graduation, desire for career change, divorce or break-up may be at higher risk. Some groups attract well-educated individuals with a higher income, and other groups target youth who are unemployed and not active in any community or social activities (Secretariat, 1986).

According to a recent survey of former members of destructive religious cults

(Buxant & Saroglou, 2008), cult membership compensated for some previously existing vulnerabilities such as the lack of a social network or negative life event. This study showed that nearly one-third of individuals experienced a traumatic life event just prior to becoming involved in the group. Some examples were bankruptcy, suicide attempts, cancer, death of parents, domestic violence, divorce, death of a close friend, or career issues. Breaking Free 16

A recent study cited “pre-cult” member characteristics that range from high levels of psychological distress to dissatisfaction and disillusionment. (Almendros, Carrobles,

& Rodriguez-Carballeira, 2007). They also found dysfunctional family patterns such as high criticism, poor communication and family enmeshment. Individuals who come from this type of family often exhibit a higher need for belonging and stability which makes them more susceptible to cult recruitment. However, other studies have shown that most cult members come from a “normal” family environment (Almendros, et al., 2007).

These statistics and studies show that there are no defined factors that indicate which population is more at risk. Susceptibility cannot be presumed, nor can contributing factors predict who will fall victim to the lure of a cult. However, former cult members have reported that deceitful and purposeful behavior on behalf of the group was the most critical factor involved in their decision to join. Their desire to be a part of something meaningful was more influential than education, family relations, or emotional variables. This shows that purposeful manipulation on the part of the group can be successfully used on anyone.

Perceived benefits

The most important perceived benefit is the promotion of the cult as a place to belong. Deborah Layton (1998) recalls feeling that Jones’ presence filled her own “inner emptiness” and that his life’s work gradually became her own, just as his world became her own. She had instant friends, purpose, boundaries, and security. In a letter written to Layton, Jones stated “Debbie, I know all about you. I feel your hurt. I am saddened by the heavy weight of your loneliness. You have known immense sorrow. You have been misunderstood and forgotten. Your parents have committed a terrible injustice by not Breaking Free 17

taking time to get to know you…Come and be one of us”(p.43) Thibodeau (1999)

observed a sense of community from his first day at the compound in Waco. “I was

struck by how people shared things with their neighbors and helped one another

out…everyone seemed cheerful and if you needed something, you only had to ask”

(p.30).

Some converts may already feel alienated from society and so being involved

with a group that is apart from society is not difficult for them. They are not put off by

any “strangeness” in the appearance or activities of the group because they actively

want to remove themselves from society.

Marshall Applewhite, the organizer of the group known as “Heaven’s Gate”

provided a new reality for the members of his group. Thirty-nine individuals felt lost in

their own worlds and chose to follow a man who claimed they would all be transported

to a spacecraft that was following the Hale-Bopp comet. These members felt so isolated

from their own place in society, that one-third of the men submitted to being castrated and all committed suicide on March 26, 1997 in order to be released from their physical bodies (Galanter, 1999). Their goal was to release their souls to board the space craft in order to be taken to another realm of physical and spiritual existence.

Searching for a place of peace

The cultic group dynamic is systematically designed to be worry-free. There is

no concern about one’s basic needs, family care, or societal obligations. The cult

provides a respite from the stress of everyday life. In a recent recovery workshop

(Henry, 1995), participants recounted their experiences of being in anxiety free-zones Breaking Free 18

while in the cult. This security wiped out all hesitations that they may have had about joining the group.

Jim Jones targeted individuals who had little money and had a high level of

stress in their everyday life. He asked them to give to the group the little money and

possessions they had and, in turn, he would take care of their physical and spiritual

needs. While the leader’s ability to make decisions for the group may seem limiting, it

actually offers relief for many people who are experiencing discord as a result of their

own decisions. Although the member may initially sense there is less to worry about,

their anxiety level will actually rise as their dissonance grows due to becoming more and

more conflicted about the group.

Higher purpose

Another perceived benefit is a sense of a higher purpose which is very strong in

attracting and keeping members in the group. A powerful purpose develops while in the

group, making it very difficult to leave. A sharing of the common purpose and a

fellowship on deeper levels is what many individuals desire and what attracts them to

specific groups.

Destructive religious cults that are apocalyptic in nature often ensnare those

members who are looking for a purpose. Groups who focus on the “end of the world” or

who spread the message that our time on earth is short also offer hope for those

members who carry out the mission of the group. The Branch Davidians focused

extensively on the “end times” as specified in the book of Revelation. They believed

that their mission was to equip David Koresh to usher in the final days, at which time,

Koresh who was considered another Christ-figure, would begin to fulfill his vision Breaking Free 19

(Reavis, 1995). A mission such as this certainly overshadowed the goals and drives of the members in their previous lives within society.

Many studies and media coverage focus upon individuals who choose to join destructive religious cults, but many members of destructive religious cults do not have any life experiences beyond the group. One such member is Elissa Wall who wrote the book entitled Stolen Innocence: My story of growing up in a polygamous sect, becoming

a teenage bride and breaking free of Warren Jeffs (2008). Wall’s story recounts her tale

of growing up within the Fundamental Latter-Day Saints (FLDS) church, being forced to

marry at the age of fourteen and finally breaking away from the group and the

courtroom drama that followed the lawsuit against the FLDS church and the prophet

Warren Jeffs. Wall starts her story with a poignant introductory message.

I had been in the FLDS from the moment that I was born. It was all that I

knew and the only way that I could imagine living. From his teachings, I knew

that the prophet’s job was to dictate what was best for us and that the words

he spoke came straight from God. I believed that my impending marriage

was God’s will and therefore nothing could be done to stop it. But, still, I had

to try. I also knew that I was different from other FLDS girls…

Wall remained within the FLDS group until her escape at the age of 24. Her

place within the group and among her family was the only place that she had ever

known. Her unyielding attempts to “stay sweet” and follow all the guidelines were in

vain. Her dissonance forced her to remove herself from her family and the group

and leaving the FLDS church left her “drained of strength…washed up and

exhausted” (p. 332). Breaking Free 20

Requirements and cost of association

Individuals who are involved in destructive religious cults pay a high price for their place within the group. Each group has its own standards, guidelines and goals for those within the group, but each member, regardless of the group, must adhere to the group in its entirety. There is no room for questioning or for voices of dissent.

The religious rhetoric of the group is often the allure that many are drawn to. A promise to fill a spiritual void is alluring for those who are searching for significance in life. Each leader and group has developed its own set of doctrines which outline areas such as spiritual growth, the after-life, marriage and family systems, finances, physical and sexual boundaries, standards of obedience and devotion. Members of the group follow strict guidelines and must adhere to the rules as the leader has defined them.

Spiritual Control

The spiritual guidelines are perhaps the most controlling for members. The way in which they live out their spiritual life is their “ticket” to eternity. They have irrevocably intertwined their spiritual core with the message of the group. Any weakness that is seen within them is a reflection on their weak spiritual character. To disagree or question the leadership of the group is to question God.

David Koresh’s followers were convinced of his role as a prophet of God and believed that he was able to teach them the way that would lead to eternity. Koresh’s teachings centered around the belief that the entire Bible was a “code” and that he, and only he, was able to unlock the prophesies. Koresh also believed that he was a

“sacrificial” lamb and would be able to unlock the “Seven Seals” that are discussed in the book of Revelation (Thibodeau, 1999). This position of power allowed him to dictate Breaking Free 21 how the members lived as well as what they believed. Koresh was able to give the spiritual guidance that so many members of his group were seeking.

A cultic organization which follows Eastern philosophy known as Bhakti Yoga is led by a man known to his followers as “Guru”. The Guru adopted many unusual practices, one of which was taking some Scripture quite literally and requiring his followers to adhere to the guidelines. He instructed his followers to view themselves as

“little boys and girls” and to view him as the “Spiritual Father”. This ideology was based on the Biblical Scripture “Lest ye be as little children, you shall not enter the Kingdom of

God”. The followers actually changed their physical appearance to appear more infantile. Klinger (1994) observed the behavior of the followers and saw grown women wearing bows in their hair and on their socks. Both the men and women were socially immature around each other, unable to converse and prone to fits of giggling.

Relationship requirements

Another requirement of members is submission to the leader’s standards of sexual, marital and family roles. Leaders establish a standard of behavior for all relationships within the group, and specific roles that are designed to strengthen the group as a whole. There is a prohibition on personal relationships because they take away from the emphasis on the group or diminish the relationship between the leader and each member. Pairing up with other members, either in friendship or love, would indicate that the person cares more about their relationship than the leader or the mission.

David Koresh required celibacy for all men in the group with the exception of himself (Thibodeau, 1999) He called sex a “distraction that seduced the spirit away from Breaking Free 22 its focus” (p.54). Koresh claimed to have been given the authority by God to procreate with any of the women and to “regenerate” the inner circle as he claimed to be the only one strong enough to bear the burden of sexuality. The men did not want to get in the way of their wives union with the “Lamb” and the women considered themselves honored to procreate with a man they considered to be God himself. Koresh would present women with “husbands” but Koresh would be the one who was the “true husband”. He claimed he had visions of the women, even as young as twelve, with whom he was to have children. Thibodeau (1999) recalls asking a young woman about her relationship with Koresh, to which she indicated that her feelings were secondary to a theological issue, the God-given command that David was to create a group of children that would surround him, the Lamb.

Jim Jones taught his followers that all men, except for him, were homosexual.

And he required married women to fantasize about him when they were with their husbands (Layton, 1998). Jones often used the young women in the group for his own sexual gratification, and would then require them to stand up in front of some of the other group members to accept responsibility for the seduction and subsequent

“distraction” of Jones.

Marital Requirements

The FLDS is a group that is associated with the beginnings of the Latter-Day

Saints religious organization. This group holds steadfast to the belief and practice of polygamy, while the mainstream LDS church has disassociated from the practice.

Although polygamy is illegal in all states, many FLDS groups operate and live in small Breaking Free 23

compound-like settings within Utah and Arizona. The group believes that the principle of

celestial marriage is what defines the FLDS (Jessop, 2007).

The FLDS often “matches” girls as young as 14 with men often up to three times their age. Elissa Wall (2008) recalls the moment that the idea of marriage was first

presented to her. She had just celebrated her 14th birthday and a man that she called

Uncle Fred spoke to her at a family gathering. Uncle Fred was the head of her family

and was watching her prepare lunch with the women of the family. Wall recalls that he

“came up behind me and put his arm around my shoulder. Very softly, he whispered in

my ear that very soon, I was going to make a good wife to a man” (p.123). Wall recalls

feeling that the comment from her “priesthood head” was rewarding, but did not take his

comment as seriously as she should have. Wall was soon married to her first cousin a

few months after the conversation.

The FLDS operates within a system that requires a man to have multiple wives

and multiple children in order to become a god after death and inhabit his own planet, of

which he will be in charge. The group believes that only a select few are chosen to be a

part of this group and that celestial marriage, which means being united in heaven after

death, is a blessing for a life that is well-lived on earth.

In her book Escape, Carolyn Jessop reveals her experiences growing up in the

FLDS and becoming the fourth wife of a highly-esteemed man within their community.

She was married at the age of 18 and, subsequently, had eight children with her husband before she was able to escape from the community. From a young age, she was taught that she should keep herself in perfect obedience to her husband in order to become a goddess with him in the afterlife, if he chose to take her with him. This Breaking Free 24 theology of belief that was instilled in her made it possible to endure years of abuse, of both herself and her children, before she was finally able to break free of the cult.

Family Systems

Cult leaders also have an intense amount of control regarding the family group. A destructive religious cult known as “Genesis Associates” was founded in the late 1980’s in Pennsylvania. There have been reports of “rage work” that involved members beating each other with pillows and plastic bats while screaming obscenities. The group also practices “detachment therapy” in which couples are split up and parents cut off from all contact with their children. (Justine, 1999)

Children are often raised as communal wards and are taught to give all allegiance to the cult rather than their parents or biological families. One former member of the Unification Church recounts directions to parents that they must not be attached to their own children and that their children came from satanic relationships (Singer

2003). Group members essentially turn over the care of their children to the group process, eliminating their own control or guidance over their children. Another group, the Sullivanians, begun in the late 1800s, taught that women unconsciously hated their children and that the family was the root of all evil (Singer 2003). The leader of this group took complete control of procreation within the group. He selected which adults were to mate, and did not allow the children to have any special bond with their biological parents.

Children within the FLDS community are seen as “property” (Jessop, 2007) and physical violence was a daily part of life within the compound for Carolyn Jessop. She recounts that putting the “fear of God” into children was not only permissible, but a way Breaking Free 25

of life. Children who misbehave are seen as a poor reflection of their mother. If a child

were to attempt to leave the community, they would be labeled as “apostate” and

condemned to the lowest realm of hell for eternity.

Wives within the FLDS are also seen as property. They are held to the highest

level of conduct and must ensure that they are honoring their husbands in every way to ensure that their husbands will take them into the after-life. Women are required to be obedient and sexually available to their husbands at all times. If they are found not

“worthy”, wives are at risk of an eternity of servanthood towards their husbands and

“sister-wives”. If a woman were to complain about any type of abuse, the community would turn on her and make the assumption that she was being “rebellious” and disobedient to her husband. Warren Jeffs, the acting prophet of the group that both Wall

(2008) and Jessop (2007) were involved in, preached to the members that “every problem that a woman faced was because she was not being perfectly obedient to her husband” (p.205, Jessop 2007).

Maintaining Control

Leaders of destructive religious cults are able to control and manipulate the members of their groups in astonishing ways. Members are unaware they are being

manipulated and used in numerous ways. Nor are they aware of the means through

which the leader controls group conduct.

Chosen and Special

Leaders of destructive religious cults consider themselves to be chosen and special. Their members are indoctrinated with stories and “signs” that prove the

importance of their leader. David Koresh recounted to his followers how he heard voices Breaking Free 26 as a child and always felt that he saw things differently as a child. He felt that he was on a “special path” and had an intense experience when he was a young man that led him to accept God’s call to be a prophet (Thibodeau, 1999) Koresh also claimed that his group members were all connected to him, physically and spiritually. If Koresh was stricken with an illness, he claimed that it was due to a member’s sin.

Warren Jeffs, prophet of the FLDS group in Arizona, claimed that he was responsible for the tsunami that destroyed parts of Thailand in 2004 and that his own prayers were a part of the attacks on 9/11 to destroy an evil world. Members also began to claim that he was transported about directly by God (Jessop, 2007). Leaders of these destructive religious cults are held in such high esteem that supernatural characteristics are often attributed to them by both group members and the leaders themselves.

Cult members may see their leaders do unethical or illegal things, but their doubts are quickly brushed away with the explanation that the leader is following God’s will. Continued questioning can cause the member to lose their place or standing within a group. The anxiety of living in a dissonant state is at times unbearable for the member. They are unable to change the cult’s behavior, so instead they change their own ideas (Henry, 1995). Members begin to accept the behavior of the leader as allowable due to his sovereign nature. When a group and a leader are seen as infallible and all-knowing, it becomes possible for the group to become authoritarian in its leadership. A sacred connection to God demands unfailing loyalty and dedication and there is no room for questioning. Breaking Free 27

Wall (2008) was taught from birth that the FLDS prophet’s job was to “dictate

what was best for us and that the words he spoke were straight from God” (p.127).

When she questioned him regarding her marriage at the age of 14 to her first cousin,

the prophet replied “Your heart is in the wrong place. This is what the prophet has revealed and directed you to do and it is your mission and duty” (p.145). If Wall had refused to marry, it would have been in direct disobedience to the prophet and her family would have had no choice but to prohibit her from continuing to live within their home.

Unattainable standards of behavior

As members become more involved in the group, they become increasingly aware of their own shortcomings and inability to adhere to the level of behavior that is required. This is intentionally done by the group leaders to gain control. Unrealistic standards that guarantee failure, in turn, serve to guarantee continued effort on the part of the member. Many members of destructive religious cults struggle with a powerlessness over their physical environment, and the added burden of being unable to attain the psychological and emotional status they are striving for reinforces their need for the support of the group.

Layton (1998) describes daily life in the South American jungle while living in

Jonestown as exhausting due to the long work days in the jungle and at the compound.

There was no access to medical care, little food and no luxuries such as hot water for bathing, times for leisure or resting. The meetings that were held each evening were far worse than the days of rigorous work. Layton describes the meetings as full of terror as

Jones would confront a member each evening for any infraction that might have been Breaking Free 28

observed by the guards throughout the day. Punishments were handed out for

infractions, real or imagined, and Jones would often give loyalty tests to the members of

the group.

Leaders often attack the attitudes and feelings of group members who are not

allowed to defend or explain themselves. Members strive to be close to the leaders of

their group, yet are unable to attain the levels of perfection that are so often placed

upon them (Hassan, 1988).

Loss of Identity

Mainstream religions typically value family involvement and relationships, while

destructive religious cults view the family as the enemy (Dowhower, 2009). The cultic

organization which follows Eastern philosophy known as Bhakti Yoga is led by a man

known to his followers as “Guru”. A former member of the group recounts a story in

which she asked the Guru if she could spend more time with members of her biological

family, who were not in the group. The Guru then proceeded to deny her any interaction with her family and told her to be grateful that she was not asked to kill members of her family, as some were asked within Biblical and Indian Scripture (Kliger,

1994).

Leslie Van Houten, a follower of Manson, recounts her experience in the book

The Long Prison Journey of Leslie Van Houten: Life Beyond the Cult (2001). In her

book she recounts her experience of being “spellbound” by Manson and the inevitable

process of losing her individuality and personal identity to the point of blindly following

Manson in his attempt to initiate “Helter Skelter”(Faith, 2001). Breaking Free 29

The more deeply the leader is able to undermine a person’s sense of identity and

self, the stronger the individual’s ties to the leader become. Deborah Layton (1998) was

a trusted member of Jim Jones’ inner circle. In the early days of her involvement in the

group she was studying to be an operating room technician and had succeeded in her studies and her work with the surgeons that she trained with. Jones, however, felt

threatened by her success outside the group. He organized a small group of her peers

to accuse her of acting treasonously and to verbally berate her for hours. Layton was

spit on, yelled at and humiliated until she agreed that her studies had become too

important to her. She was forced to drop out of her program and agreed to focus more

on the group and Jones’ assignments for her. Layton recalls feeling appreciative of

Jones and considered his manipulation as love motivated by a desire for her to be

stronger.

The FLDS often prohibits women from making personal decisions, either big or

small. If a child is urgently sick, the father of the home must approve a trip to the

hospital or a call for an ambulance. Women who make their own decisions without

consulting their priesthood head, their husbands, are considered rebellious. Jessop

(2007) recalls making a decision about the laundry schedule in order to more efficiently

wash clothes for the more than thirty people in their home. Her husband berated and

shamed her for taking matters into her own hands. She recalls feeling as though “we

were living in a world that was neither logical nor rational” (p. 290). Women were

required to be continually “in harmony” with their husbands, a phrase that is often used

against wives who are not compliant with their husbands wishes. Breaking Free 30

True religion respects the individual’s autonomy, while destructive religious cults

enforce compliance and discourage questions and independent thinking (Dowhower,

2009). Autonomy is a direct threat to the cult leader and is not permitted. The member

learns to ignore his inner self and learns to only rely on the leader. Members begin to

develop an inability to think for themselves and begin to rely on others to think, act and

feel for them. Hassan (1990) asserts that cult leaders also intentionally “transfer to new

and strange locations, switch their work duties, promote them, then demote them on

whims- all to keep them (the members) off balance” (p.81).

There is no recognition for personal achievements or growth. All success is

attributed to the leader and their ability to guide members toward their

accomplishments. A lack of personal growth makes reliance on the leader more

powerful. The identity of the members is entangled with the leader and they often

cannot see themselves apart from the group as a whole.

Maintaining control by isolation

How are these leaders able to control intelligent, educated, thoughtful people?

The systems that are set up within the group provide a “self-sealing system” (Lalich,

1994) that holds the believers to the group. Every part of their lives is tied to the group,

and they have little, if any, chance of leaving. One of the major ways that leaders

maintain control is by both physical and emotional isolation. By keeping the group away from outside influences and outside “eyes”, the leaders are free to lead in the ways which suit them. Layton (1999) recalls that when the moment members arrived at

Jonestown in South America, their passports were taken for “safekeeping”. Jonestown Breaking Free 31

was set in the middle of a jungle with no contact with the outside world, and there was

no place to go for those members who desired to leave.

Another group known as “The Family” based their doctrine on the belief that the

Anti-Christ would set in motion Armageddon and their fear prompted them to move to

the mountainous areas of India. The members predicted a One World Government and

that implanted microchips would be required for all individuals. They hoped that their

move would protect them from the new regime of authority (Walsh, 2001). Such a removal from outside influences enables a leader to have complete control over every aspect of a member’s life.

The FLDS group, led by Warren Jeffs, banned all books, television, radio and even the color red, as it was considered to be a “sinful” color (Jessop, 2007). The children were removed from public and private schools and made to stay home and learn from selected books by the prophet. Women in the group were not allowed to

have drivers licenses, and the vehicles that the women had access to were not

registered and did not have license plates on them to prevent them from traveling very

far outside the compound.

Because most destructive religious cults are isolated from society, there is little

influence to criticize the means or methods by which the leader requires the members to

live. The Branch Davidians allowed their young daughters and sisters, often as young

as 13, to be “married” to Koresh. This sexual abuse was allowed and, at times,

promoted by parents who had been so removed from mainstream society they felt it was an honor that their daughters were chosen (Thibodeau, 1999) . A new culture can Breaking Free 32

be developed within these groups and the line between acceptable and unacceptable is

drawn by a man who claims to be sovereign.

Controlled by Fear

Aside from isolation, the largest controller of cultic groups is fear. Leaders instill a great deal of fear within the hearts and minds of the group. Fear of death, fear of

rejection, fear of losing one’s place in the after-life or even fear of one’s own family can

be motivators for members to blindly follow the commands of their leader.

In a culture where belonging is the most important goal, losing that place is the most traumatic loss that a member can endure. Members will often be “scape-goated” in front of the rest of the group. An example of this is when a priesthood holder within the

FLDS is stripped of his priesthood for any variety of reasons. The man is publically

disciplined and then his wives and children are given to other men, deemed to be more

worthy priesthood holders. Public humiliation ensures that members will continue to

work hard to please their leader. The punishment of those who question authority or

break the group rules is a proven way of keeping those less rebellious “in line”. Wall

(2008) recalls being called up to the front of church when she was caught talking to a

young boy in her school and, subsequently, turned in by her half-sister. Warren Jeffs, the acting prophet, reprimanded her and shamed her for a relationship that never even existed. Wall recounts her fears at being caught even speaking with males in the group.

A deep sense of love and respect develops between members and to leave the group would essentially leave them cut off from their family members and from those new relationships that have occurred while in the group. Thibodeau (1999) recalls Breaking Free 33

identifying with the community so much that he would share a common, violent end if necessary. His fear of being left out was greater than any fear of death.

Fear of death is another main motivator that leaders use to justify violent or aggressive behaviors. Apocalyptic thinking also creates an atmosphere conducive to the legitimacy of violence.(Mayer, 2001) It creates an atmosphere of urgency for the members to act. The Branch Davidians considered themselves a “pre-millennial” cult, which believed that the world was becoming more evil every day and that the

Millennium would be brought about in a catastrophic manner. (Newport, 2002) They believed that a Messiah would bring redemption to the corrupt world during the catastrophe. Therefore, the members of this group had no choice but to follow the

instructions of Koresh. They felt that their physical lives depended on their obedience to

him. The feared their own destruction if they were to act out of accordance with the

plan.

These groups who focus on end-times and the world collapsing also have a

stronger propensity towards violence. They may feel that they have nothing to lose and

therefore all societal rules are null. “Apocalyticism, conspiracy beliefs, and persecution

hysteria contribute to the spreading of violence” (Mayer, 2001).

The FLDS believes that the main priority of their lives is to prepare for the “Great

Destruction” and the redeeming of Zion. They believe that God will send destruction to the world and that only the most worthy will survive. This quest for worthiness is their

motivation and the reasoning behind all of their deeds, prayers and commitments. A

lack of worthiness is their greatest fear. Breaking Free 34

Any difficulty within the group is blamed on destructive outside focuses, a

perceived threat to their entire structure (Mayer, 2001). Many groups that are made up

of peaceful individuals can become involved in atrocious violence because of a

perceived assault. They often see their behavior as self-defense. This perception has

been used by leaders to justify a radical behavior that is acted out by fearful individuals

who have been convinced that their very lives and spiritual after-life are in jeopardy. In

the months that preceded the tragedy at his compound, Koresh often spoke of “dark

waters” that were rising around the group. He built an imminent feeling of the forces

that would be fighting against the group and that the group was surrounded by a society

that would turn on them because they lived a different life (Thibodeau, 1999).

A member’s place within the group is manipulated by the leader in order to maintain motivation and to provide incentive for good behavior. Members strive for acceptance and validation and will sacrifice others to obtain approval. Members often compete with one another for attention and are often required to report any other member who questions or show concern about the leadership or the group’s activities.

If a member fails to report a suspicious activity, they may be considered guilty by association and may be publically punished and humiliated. Some leaders ask trusted members to “test” other members by pretending to break rules to see if others will report their behavior. Wall (2008) recalls another wife of her father hiding in her own mother’s closet to “spy” on Wall and her siblings to see if they were following instructions from the prophet regarding the music that they listened to. Wall was later chastised for finding the woman and questioning her authority. Breaking Free 35

Punishments and rewards are handed out frequently within destructive religious

cults. Special time with the leader, acknowledgement of good behavior in front of the

group, or even additional food or clothing are used to reinforce behavior that is seen as

beneficial to the group. Punishments are given for even the slightest hint of disobedience or infractions of rules. Members may face removal of privacy, food or sleep deprivation, replacement of relationships, or verbal abuse (Wallis, 2007).

One member of Jonestown was punished for falling asleep during an “emergency

meeting”. The purpose of these meetings was to prepare for an eventual attack on the

compound by the American government and the meetings were often held after a

grueling 12 hour workday under the hot sun. The man who fell asleep was forced to

endure a snake put around his neck by his own son (Layton 1998).

Fear and isolation are used jointly within groups by the cult leaders. One of the

ways in which leaders are allowed to isolate their groups is by instilling deep-seeded

fears into the members regarding the evilness of the outside world. Outsiders, even

family members, are considered to be threatening (Hassan 1990). Many groups teach

that war is inevitable and will be ushered in by ruthless government leaders. Only those

who are safe within the group will be saved.

David Koresh felt very strongly that the government was purposing to alienate

children from their families and he refused to allow the children within the Branch

Davidians to go to public school. They were all taught at the compound and received

instruction in the spiritual teachings of the group. Many children who come out of

destructive cults may show a profound knowledge of abstract concepts such as life and

death, but fail to grasp mathematical or geographical facts. Koresh would often say, Breaking Free 36

“We don’t need an extravagant church to worship God. All we need is a roof over our

heads to keep the elements out and walls to keep the world at bay” (Thibodeau, 1999,

p. 82).

In Jonestown, the leadership would read daily “reports” of events happening

around the world. The members of the group were bombarded with stories of violence,

evil dictators, and the vicious actions taken by American leaders. Layton (1998) recalls

feeling “relieved” that she was far away from the American system and “safe” within the

jungle. Fear of the world outside the group is pervasive and can lead to an almost

phobic condition among cult members.

Thought Reform

Many view cults as a place where intense brain-washing occurs. There have

been many studies done on the concept of “brainwashing” and “mind control”. There

are numerous views on the prevalence of brainwashing techniques used with members of destructive religious cults. However, there is agreement on the presence of a process of destructive, manipulative and exploitive social pressure that may include physical intimidation or constraint (Robbins, 2001). Robbins also asserts that “any group that is united by a fervent ideology can probably be accused of some pattern of mind control or mental manipulation” (p.176). This type of mental coercion can also be promoted by the use of “drills”, which is a common characteristic of a destructive religious cult (Bohm & Alison, 2001) .

In Jonestown, these drills were referred to as “White Nights”. Members of the group were awakened in the middle of the night and rushed to the main meeting hall amidst the sounds of yelling and gunfire in the surrounding jungle. Jones would then Breaking Free 37 advise the fearful group that they were under attack by a group known as Concerned

Relatives, which was organized by traitorous former members of the People’s Temple.

He would then tell the frightened group that they were surrounded by the Concerned

Relatives and the CIA who were attempting to attack, torture and imprison the group.

Jones would then begin the illusion of passing out poisoned juice to the members, only to announce that the threat was over and that the group was spared from death another day (Layton 1998).

These drills were enacted by the very guards who “protected” the compound and by Jones who was desperate to maintain his control. Layton states that the group “was blinded by fear and isolation…physically weak from malnutrition and lack of sleep and mentally exhausted from constant fear of punishment, we were feeble, compliant automatons. In madness, there is no way to think logically” (p.181).

Robert J. Lifton describes a method of mind control that is achieved through control of human communication (Walsh, 2001). Leaders of destructive religious cults will control the thoughts of their members by controlling how the individuals communicate with the outside world, and also by controlling the information that the outside world brings to the individual. This is achieved by limiting outside contact with families, jobs, entertainment and even medical care. The only information that the members receive is thoroughly censored by the leadership of the group.

Wall (2008) describes how “lessons” were given to the children in her school every day. These devotionals were given by Warren Jeffs, leader of the FLDS, over the public address system and the children were required to take notes which were always reviewed and graded. “Uncle Warren” would begin his lessons by asserting his control Breaking Free 38 and power by reminding the listeners that he was devoted to doing the will of the prophet. Lessons were also given via tapes that the children were encouraged to listen to and that were played continuously during the day at homes, as well as at school. Wall recounts feeling much confusion with the doctrine and theology that she was hearing, but that she was afraid to ask questions for fear it would seem she was “unworthy” or questioning priesthood principles.

Disaffiliation

Leaving a cult can be extremely difficult. While in some cults the physical act of walking away may not be impeded, the psychological bonds that prevent members from leaving are strong. The first step in the process of disaffiliating is the cognitive change that occurs when a member begins to have doubts about his or her involvement. Once a member begins to question the mission, the leadership or the methods of a group, the door is opened for their exit. This is why the leaders of destructive religious cults work so hard to eliminate situations that lead to members questioning the group process.

Life within the group can be exhausting and confusing and most members have lost their ability to think critically. Long work days, lack of medical care and the absence of a support system make it difficult for one to even begin the process of questioning the group. Singer, (2003) reports that some former members describe their life in the cult as

“living in a fog”, feeling as if there was a veil over their eyes, or “functioning by rote”

(p.270).

Members leave when they become disillusioned about the group and its mission.

Often the anxiety they feel due to constant dissonance becomes too much and they are unable to discuss or work through their concerns. The group fails to deliver on its Breaking Free 39 promise and the member sees inconsistencies in the message of the group and its actions (Robinson & Bradley, 1998).

There are generally three types of people who leave destructive religious cults.

They consist of those members who had intervention, those who left on their own (walk- aways), and those members who were expelled or cast away from the group

(Giambalvo, 1993). Those members who are expelled or walk-away are those who need the most help in the recovery process. There is a great sense of loss for the former members who have left friends and even biological family members within the cult. Members who leave often struggle greatly with feelings of guilt.

Obstacles

A main obstacle in disaffiliating is the lack of outside support. Most members have little, if any, interaction with those outside of the group. This was the case with members of the People’s Temple. Jonestown was situated within the middle of the

South American jungle, and only those in leadership positions were allowed to leave the compound and go into the surrounding villages. Deborah Layton was fortunate enough to have had access to financial resources and one outside contact to assist her in leaving the group. Her brother and mother were not so fortunate.

When leaving the group, ex-members feel homeless and unprotected. They are generally not even allowed to speak to the remaining members. The threat of this self- annihilation is a terrifying factor in one’s decision to leave their group. While in the group, members have seen the way that the group treats and speaks of those who leave. They are referred to as weak or impure and not worthy of the group. Steve

Hassan, author of Combating Mind Control (1990), was involved with the “Moonies”, the Breaking Free 40

group led by Sun Myung Moon. During his first few days outside of the cult, when his

family was attempting to “deprogram” him, Hassan recalls his belief, given to him by the

group, that it was “better to die or kill than to leave the church” (p.27). Hassan asserts

that members are “systematically made to feel phobic about leaving the group” (p.44).

Chronic sickness due to lack of medical care, forced celibacy, long work hours and

sleep deprivation are factors that contribute to mental anguish, which leaves members

unable to mentally sort through all their concerns and impedes the recovery process.

Psychological Considerations

There are many psychological implications that a member may experience when

leaving a group. Some symptoms that occur among former members include:

depression, anxiety, dissociation, PTSD, alcohol abuse, relationship problems, conduct

disorders, panic attacks, eating disorders, suicidal ideation, and anger (Lottick, 2008).

They can also suffer from withdrawal symptoms, hallucinations, or delusions (Wallis,

2007). Many members who are “psychologically bound” to the group experience some

of the same constraints as women who are in situations of domestic violence.

The study conducted by Buxant and Saroglou( 2008), showed that most

participants chose to leave the group because of an “incoherence” between the doctrine

of the group and their own beliefs. They also felt that the high demand and constraints

of the group were reasons for leaving the group. Members with high levels of autonomy

are often likely to leave or be expelled by the group. Second generation members often

have a higher need for individuality and autonomy (Walsh & Bor, 1996). Those members who were born into a group, not ever having experienced a “mind-change”, are often more prone to questioning and exploring other options than those which the Breaking Free 41

group allows. Those who struggle to conform while in the group are often tenacious and

the characteristics that caused them so much trouble while in the group are their

greatest assets and strengths while attempting to re-build their lives outside the group.

There is no doubt that new religious movements have created a number of problems for some of the ex-members and their families (Langone, 2006). Former members of the People’s Temple faced severe retribution if they left the group. Layton

(1998) describes threats, and even disappearances of members who tried to leave the group. Families or individuals who were “caught” before they were able to leave were publically beaten and re-educated. Layton herself was required to be photographed with the rubber hose used for beatings, which was to be used as blackmail if she ever

tried to leave. Leaders will also force members to openly discuss their “secrets” with the

group. Jim Jones would record all that was said in a book and the information could be

used against the members as insurance that they would never attempt to leave.

Processing

It is difficult for members to acknowledge their involvement in a cult, because they are often slow to label their group. One former member who now provides help for others, relays that he had been out of his group for two years before he acknowledged that it was indeed a cult (Langone, 2006). He was forced to re-evaluate years of deception. Due to years of deception, former members are also more likely to blame themselves for any problems rather than the group. They will spend much time, both before and after leaving the group, trying to determine why they were not able to live up to the group’s standards, and they struggle with the belief that “the group is always right” (Langone, 2006). For many members, after giving up their families, friends, Breaking Free 42 careers, finances and self-concept, it is difficult for them to admit “defeat”. To give up those things for a greater good or a cause is one thing, but to begin to acknowledge the deceit and the lies that they fell victim to is almost unbearable.

Once the former member has been able to acknowledge cult involvement it is critical for them to begin to understand why they became involved. Lalich (1994) offer some questions that members can begin to ask themselves: What was going on in my life at that particular time? What was my initial reaction to the group and leader? How was I mislead during recruitment? Why did they want me? These questions can be an important step as the member begins to disaffiliate from the group.

Recommendations for treatment

The therapeutic needs of former members vary from person to person, but it is likely that members will experience much grief and inner turmoil as a result of being away from the group. Members who leave the group may experience a great sense of loss and may go through the classic stages of grief. Their anger can take the form of depression and guilt and most may not know how to deal with it all. Above all, the former member must learn how to overcome the fear and the effects of isolation that will follow them even outside of the group.

Therapeutic Methods

There are many obstacles that former members must overcome in order to move away from their life within a cult. The most important issues for a former member to address are the need for a strong therapeutic bond with a therapist, the overcoming of fear and isolation through social integration, the restoration of social interest and the re-defining of one’s spiritual base. Breaking Free 43

In order to restore the sense of themselves, a strong therapeutic bond can be critical as these individuals reconnect with their pasts and reflect on times that they trusted themselves and had solid relationships with others (Langone, 1994). A vital part of this therapeutic process is the therapist themselves. A recent survey showed that of

695 psychologists, 13% reported personal experience with cultic groups and 33% reported having treated members of cultic groups (Langone, 2004). This population of individuals deserves providers who are educated and aware of the specific issues that may be unique to former members of destructive religious cults. The more sensitive the therapist is to the former members, the more the individual will sense empathy and will be able to speak freely about their thoughts and feelings since leaving the group. Most members have lost much of their ability to think for themselves and may find themselves in a terror-filled place within their minds, surrounded by people who they believe to be evil. Many may need a period of time to grieve (Robinson & Bradley, 1998) and the therapist needs to help the client avoid feelings of guilt (Richmond, 2004).

Assessment

It is critical to carefully assess former members in order to be able to formulate how to best help them. Some members may be pre-disposed to personality factors or high levels of certain needs. It is vital to assess the damages and specific impacts before, during and after the cult experience (Lalich, 1994). Some issues that Lalich suggests that a therapist assess are factors from before involvement such as age, medical history and personality characteristics. He also suggests research into the length of time within the group, the severity of the group’s indoctrination process, access to medical treatments during their time in the group and the extent of the loss of Breaking Free 44

their outside support system. Another point of interest is the level to which the ex-

member was involved in the group. Needless to say, an inner-core member will have

very different experiences than those of a new recruit.

Treatment Methods

The results of a survey administered in 2008, indicate that favored forms of

treatment for former members include the highly effective CBT; cognitive behavioral

therapy. (Lottick, 2008) Other methods included psychodynamic, insight-oriented,

behavioral or hypnotherapy, along with psychotropic medications (Lottick, 2008). The survey found that authoritarian or directive approaches were ineffective with this

specialized group and their needs.

A therapeutic relationship must also focus on teaching new critical thinking skills.

The cults often impart their own sets of thinking, acting, feeling, behaving and learning.

Members who leave the group no longer have guidelines for their lives. They may suffer

a lack of direction and once again feel like they have no answers to their questions

The issues that plagued a member before group involvement will return when the

member leaves the group and may be even more pronounced because of the emotional

turmoil (Robinson & Frey, 1997). It is vital that the former member be able to look back

at their life before the cult involvement and see the pieces that led them to the group.

Former members run a high risk of re-joining cults if they are unable to process why

they joined in the first place (Singer 2004).

Re-establishment of Spiritual Life

Another issue that the clinician must be prepared to work with is discussion and

re-building of an individual spiritual base. Most former cult members consider spiritual Breaking Free 45

growth the most pressing issue of all (Langone, 1994). Individuals often join a

destructive religious cult seeking to fill a deep spiritual need and when they leave their

group, that void becomes even more pronounced. It is imperative, if the ex-member

considers it a high-priority to seek spiritual solace, that the therapist enable and equip them to accomplish their goal. Reestablishing trust in God can often be more difficult than rebuilding the trust within themselves. According to Langone (1994), many ex-

members who have experienced such evil, search for an answer to why this has

happened to them. This process takes time and should not be rushed. The member

should feel free to question and be angry with God for a time. Langone asserts that “a

bit of trust in God can lead to a bit of trust in oneself which in turn can lead to a bit of

trust in others” (p.3).

According to one study (Buxant & Saroglou, 2008), former members still give the

same importance to God as they did during their involvement in a group. When they

were compared with adults from the general population, ex-members were still found to

have placed a greater importance on spirituality. Many of them felt that it would be

difficult to enjoy any type of group setting (religious or otherwise), mainly because of the

constraints, authority relationships and time commitments.

Social Interest

As shown within this paper, leaders control their members by fear and isolation

and it is critical that the former members be able to overcome isolationist tendencies

and successfully re-integrate within mainstream society. Those who are born into a cult

have a difficult time when they leave the group because they do not have any idea of

how to act within society. They have been indoctrinated into a belief that the world is evil Breaking Free 46 and wicked and, as such, their adjustment is difficult (Wallis, 2007). Former members fear the world and other people and the seclusion that many of them lived in often leaves them with few social skills, career options, or an understanding of how the world works. A prominent feature of disaffiliated cult members is that they may have “a developmental lag in their social and experiential lives” (Singer, 1994, p 315). The former members may feel a great deal of alienation and a loss of ideas, goals and personal values. Singer (1994) asserts that they may even feel a bit like immigrants or refugees entering a new country. The best way to overcome these obstacles is for the former member to build a social network. And the best way for a therapist to encourage this is to promote a great deal of social interest.

Social interest is an innate cooperation between an individual and others around him or her (Ansbacher & Ansbacher, 1956). By focusing energies and striving for the good of others, one is able to develop an attitude towards life that is based on empathy, understanding and cooperation. A natural byproduct of a lifestyle of social interest is connectedness and collaboration with others.

Singer (1997) encourages former members to develop a new social network through a work environment, returning to school, and making new friends. This is obviously easier said than done, as former members of destructive religious cults are often fearful and distrusting of new people. Activities such as volunteering or community service can be a sensible segue into social relationships. There are many resources available for those recovering from involvement in destructive religious cults.

Group therapy and involvement with other former members can be helpful as one processes their time within the cult. Breaking Free 47

It is vital that the former members have an innate sense of hope during the process of their recovery. According to Yalom (2005), the installation and maintenance of hope is crucial to positive outcomes within the therapeutic process. Inspiration can be given by other former members of destructive religious cults who have successfully begun the process of peeling off the layers that the cult involvement has left them with.

Hope within the therapeutic process can lead to an internal installation of hope that will give individuals a sense of optimism and encouragement that is vital for them during their disaffiliation process.

Conclusion

Involvement in a destructive religious cult can leave members filled with distrust, uncertainty and an inability to think critically in many areas of their lives. The ability to re-establish themselves into society is a difficult journey that must be met with fierce bravery and determination.

During the stages of recovery from destructive religious cults (Langone, 1993), the most difficult part for former members may be the resolution of the loss of fellowship, caring, and purpose that they found while in a group. The search for this feeling of belonging can resemble an addiction, with a never-ending quest for fulfillment.

Regaining a purpose and pursuing a quest for meaning is paramount for former members of destructive religious cults. Effective therapy must be encouraging and affirming while assisting in re-building the person at their core. Support, reconciliation and information (Langone, 1993) are critical as the former member pursues their new life. Re-building trust in relationships is a difficult journey, but the benefits from having stable, supportive relationships can ensure that former members are equipped to live Breaking Free 48 without the fear, isolation and anxiety that they have become accustomed to. Integrating themselves into mainstream society is vital to their recovery process.

It is imperative that mental health providers, clergy, and family members understand the depths of the experiences that former members have had. With this information, support and tools can be given to the former members as they attempt to re-build lives and relationships. Their minds, feelings, goals and bodies have been destroyed and they will most often return from these groups as mere shells of their former selves.

1984 (Orwell, 1949) captures the process that many former members have gone through during their time in the group.

"Never again will you be capable of ordinary human feeling. Everything will

be dead inside you. Never again will you be capable of love, or friendship,

or joy of living, or laughter, or curiosity, or courage, or integrity. You will be

hollow. We shall squeeze you empty and then we shall fill you with

ourselves."

As accurate as this sentiment may be for leaders and members of destructive religious groups, a vital piece of the human spirit is minimized. The power of hope must never be trivialized. Former members of destructive religious cults have the ability and the resources to pursue their own happiness and lives that are indeed filled with laughter, curiosity, courage and integrity. This can be accomplished by outstretched hands and sustaining optimism that shows the resiliency of the human spirit filled with hope.

Breaking Free 49

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