How NOT to Respond to Tragedy: Learning from Job's Friends

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How NOT to Respond to Tragedy: Learning from Job's Friends Wheelersburg Baptist Church 4/22/07 Brad Brandt “How NOT to Respond to Tragedy: Learning from Job’s Friends” ** Main Idea: We learn both how to respond and how NOT to respond to tragedy by looking at Job’s friends in the book of Job. I. We learn how to help people in crisis (2:11-13). A. Notice what Job’s friends did (11-12). 1. They heard about Job’s trouble (11). 2. They went to be with Job. 3. Their goal was to comfort him. 4. They wept and grieved with Job (12). B. Notice what Job’s friends did not do (13). 1. They did not hide their grief (no plastic smiles!). 2. They did not rush Job. 3. They did not speak to Job seven days and nights. C. Notice some marks of a good friend. 1. A good friend makes personal sacrifices. 2. A good friend is a good listener. 3. A good friend engages in the ministry of presence. 4. A good friend exhibits humility. 5. A good friend is real. II. We learn how NOT to help people in crisis (chapters 3-37). A. Here’s what Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar did (chapters 3-31). 1. They said true things but failed to get all the facts. 2. The problem wasn’t so much what they said but what they didn’t know (11:7-8). 3. They said there had to be sin when there wasn’t (8:4; 11:6; 18:19; 22:5). 4. They preached truth at Job instead of ministering truth to him. 5. They didn’t really listen. They heard words, misunderstood, and ran with them (6:28). 6. They were black and white thinker with no room for “gray” areas (8:20). 7. They offered good answers, but to the wrong question (11:13-16). 8. They had an inadequate view of suffering (12:5). 9. They failed to give Job what he needed, pity (19:21). 10. They accused Job of things he had not done (22:6-9). 11. They said true things but in the wrong context, things that did not apply to Job (22:21-25). 12. They didn’t understand what was happening in Job’s life, but presumed they did. Job didn’t understand either, but was honest about it (23:1-5). 13. They misused “worm theology” (25:6). 14. They kept hounding Job, one right after the other. 15. They failed to give Job hope (26:2). B. Here’s what Elihu did (chapters 32-37). 1. He tried to speak in God’s behalf without God’s authorization (36:1). 2. He said there was a sin problem when there wasn’t (36:17). 3. He wouldn’t stop talking. III. We learn about ourselves when faced with crisis. A. We may not know God as well as we think we do (42:7). B. We need a mediator (42:8-9). 1. Job interceded for his friends. 2. Job points us to Christ (19:25). This week our nation was shocked by tragic killings that occurred at Virginia Tech University . On Monday, a man named Cho Seung Hui left his dorm room on the Blacksburg campus and killed thirty-two students and teachers and then himself. In the words of The Washington Post’s David Maraniss, this was “the bloodiest mass murder by a lone gunman in American history.”[1] Not surprisingly, in the days since the Monday killings, nearly everyone has been talking about Blacksburg , Virginia . And rightfully so. Our hearts go out to the families of those who lost their lives. There’s an important question that all this should raise in our minds as the people of God. How should we respond to tragedy? All of us responded to this week’s tragedy. Even no response is a response. The question is how should we respond when we hear of tragedy? The fact is, this is not the last tragedy we’ll encounter, so the question is essential. What is the God-honoring way to respond? We need not wonder, for God’s Word tells us. No place in the Bible addresses the subject of tragedy more vividly than the book of Job, so let’s turn there. Allow me to narrow the scope of our study. My aim in taking you to Job is not to learn how to endure tragedy in a God honoring way, as valuable as that would be. My aim is to learn how to respond to tragedy in other’s lives. Our focus will be on Job’s friends. By looking at Job’s friends we can gain insight both in how to respond and more specifically, in how NOT to respond to tragedy. I want us to look at these three counselors who, although they did some things right, in the end missed the mark. We can learn from Job’s friends: Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar—and Elihu (although he’s a more controversial figure when it comes to interpretation). By the way, lest you think the following critique is unsubstantiated, realize this. God Himself said they were poor counselors in 42:7, “After the LORD had said these things to Job, he said to Eliphaz the Temanite, ‘I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken of me what is right, as my servant Job has.’” The Background in the Book of Job: Job didn’t know it was coming. Life changed for him in one day. First, he lost his possessions—and he had a lot to lose. He who was “the greatest man among all the peoples of the East (1:3)” became just the opposite all at once. He lost more than we can imagine having. Then he lost his children, all ten the same day. His servant brought him news that his seven sons and three daughters were together at the oldest brother’s house when a storm hit and killed them, all of them. But that wasn’t all. Job’s internal pain moved outward when severe boils spread over his entire body. The physical agony was so extreme that all Job could do was sit in a pile of ashes and scrape his sores with a piece of pottery. The pain took a different form at this point. Job’s wife, who herself was suffering great loss, gave her husband this counsel, “Are you still holding on to your integrity? Curse God and die! (2:9)” Yet Job refused. He knew there is something more important in life than personal comfort. This is God’s world. We exist for God, not vise versa. And so in response to his losses Job did the following. After the first wave of tragedy, according to 1:20-22: “Job got up and tore his robe and shaved his head. Then he fell to the ground in worship and said: ‘Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.’ In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.” Then, after the second wave of loss Job said this to his wife in 2:10: “’You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?’ In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.” Remember, we have an advantage not available to Job as he endures this trial. We know why it is happening. He doesn’t. We know about the conversation between God and Satan. The issue in this book is this. Is God enough for His people? Is God sufficient? Job was a great man, but this isn’t a book to highlight Job’s virtue as much as it is a book to teach us about God through the life of a man who lost nearly everything. So there’s the situation. Job has lost his possessions, his children, his health, and the support of his wife. He is in absolute agony, physically and emotionally. At this low point three of his friends enter the picture. They’ll be with Job for the rest of the story. We can learn from these friends how to help someone in crisis. We can also learn from them how not to help a person in crisis. They did both. I. We learn how to help people in crisis (2:11-13). Job 2:11 sets the stage, “When Job’s three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.” Verse 11 mentions Job’s three friends. Were these his best friends? His only friends? It’s interesting they were all from different ethnic backgrounds. According to the Bible Knowledge Commentary: “’Eliphaz’ is an Edomite name (Gen. 36:4), and as a Temanite he was from either Teman in Edom , known for its wisdom (Jer. 49:7 ; Obad. 8 ), or Tema in Arabia . ‘Bildad’ is not used elsewhere in the Bible, and Shuhite may suggest a relationship to Shuah, Abraham’s youngest son by Keturah (Gen. 25:2 ). The name ‘Zophar’ is used only in Job, and his lineage as a Naamathite is unknown, though some have suggested that Naamah, a Canaanite town inherited by Judah (Josh. 15:41 ), was his hometown. Elihu, was also present though he is not mentioned till later (Job 32 ).
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