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The Blue and White THE UNDERGRADUATE MAGAZINE OF COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY, EST. 1890 THE BLUE AND WHITE Vol. XIX No. V November 2013 Endangered Speeches Columbia, Cornell, and Yale join forces to offer less commonly taught languages The Student Doth Protest A look at how Student-Worker Solidarity is taking shape ALSO INSIDE: JUDGING A BOOK BY ITS COVERS THE BLUE AND WHITE Vol. XIX FAMAM EXTENDIMUS FACTIS No. V COLUMNS FEATURES 4 BLUEBOOK Conor Skelding & 10 AT TWO SWORDS’ LENGTH: ARE YOU CRYING? CONOR SKELDING, CC ’14, Editor in Chief 6 BLUE NOTES Mikey Abrams Our monthly prose and cons ANNA BAHR, BC ’14, Managing Editor 8 CAMPUS CHARACTERS ndANGERED PEECHES WILL HOLT, CC ’15, Senior Editor 12 VERILY VERITAS Naomi Sharp 14 E S TORSTEN ODLAND, CC ’15, Senior Editor 13 CURIO COLUMBIANA Columbia, Cornell, and Yale join forces to offer less commonly SOMER OMAR, CC ’16, Senior Editor 30 MEASURE FOR MEASURE taught languages NAOMI SHARP, CC ’15, Senior Editor 40 SKETCHBOOK JESSIE CHASAN-TABER, CC ’16, Layout Editor 42 DIGITALIA COLUMBIANA Luca Marzorati 18 THIRD IS THE ONE WITH THE TREASURE CHEST LEILA MGALOBLISHVILI, CC ’16, Senior Illustrator 43 CAMPUS GOSSIP Columbia dropout, Jack Hidary, runs for mayor MATTHEW SEIFE, CC ’16, Publisher Tamsin Pargiter 20 ABSOLUTISM Absolute’s hold on the Morningside bagel market Staff Writers NAOMI COHEN, CC ’15 ALEXANDER PINES, CC ’16 Torsten Odland 21 WILSON DANIEL STONE, CC ’16 ALEXANDRA SVOKOS, CC ’14 Andrew and Wilson head to Brooklyn Contributors MIKEY ABRAMS, CC ’16 Channing Prend 24 FLAGGING ENTHUSIASM MICHELLE CHERIPKA, CC ’16 How General Studies is letting its nontraditional flag fly TYLER DINGMAN, CC ’16 COOPER LYNN, CC ’17 LUCA MARZORATI, CC ’15 Somer Omar 25 THE STUDENT DOTH PROTEST ANGELICA MODABBER, BC ’16 TAMSIN PARGITER, BC ’15 A look at how Student-Worker Solidarity is taking shape CHANNING PREND, CC ’17 JENNIFER SLUKA, CC ’17 MATTHEW SEIFE, CC ’16 Anna Bahr 28 I WOndER HALLIE NELL SWANSON, CC ’16 ISAIAH THOMAS, CC ’16 Debora Spar on why the second sex can’t always finish first ETHAN WU, CC ’17 ANOPLY OF PEC Artists Daniel Stone 29 A P S RACHEL AGINS, CC ’17 Judging a book by its covers ZANE BHANSCLI, CC ’17 BRITT FOSSUM, CC ’16 JULIA JARRETT, CC ’15 Michelle Cheripka 32 MEASURING SUccESS ANGEL JIANG, CC ’15 KATHARINE LIN, CC ’16 How one computer science student got from Mudd to Momofuku ALEXANDER PINES, CC ’16 ANNE SCOTTI, CC ’16 ALEXANDRA WARRICK, BC ’17 Madeline Pages 34 FREncH SEEK ASYLUM GRAYSON WARRICK, CC ’16 Uncovering the former chambers of La Maison Française Conor Skelding 35 “STOP BLOGGING FOR FREE” A conversation with Rick MacArthur theblueandwhite.org f COVER: “October Tribute” by Leila Mgaloblishvili BLUE BOOK BLUE BOOK Textile Trivia: the material corduroy, whose name is apocryphally derived from the French corde du roi (“cord of the King”), is distinguished by units called wales, which are the individual ridges of the fabric (and coincidentally, an autonomous country that is part of the United Kingdom). Measured in wales per inch, the typical corduroy is 11-wale (and found ruling trousers the world over). However—though fall approaches and elbow-patched philosopher-kings even now claim campus, we at The Blue and White have found our attention held not by woolen-scarves, but rather by the more mundane school accoutrements carried and worn by Columbia’s Various Cliques. Some are rendered below. LETTER FROM THE EDITOR TRANSACTIONS ARRIVALS Readers, Al Jaffee’s personal work and archives (Mad magazine), for the It’s fall, and we’ve settled in. We have so many weekly RBML CourseWorks posts or problem sets to do. We spend too many of our Thursday, Friday, and Saturday nights out (or too few). We get A new senator, for the College worked up about minor campus scandals and Columbia sporting events (if we care about those sorts of things). Administrative dicta regarding Since it is November, we’ve put up new names on our school spirit masthead and taken down the old ones. (Soon I’ll be off it.) But POSTCARD FROM MORNINGSIDE every college group turns over quickly. It is probably pretty trite to DEPARTURES think that as a senior, but it is still a revelation to me. (It hit me when in a recent email a Bwog alum addressed me as “Young Conor,” a Sun tans nickname I haven’t been called since freshman year.) When e-boards and rosters turn over so quickly, groups rise Knowing glances and fall precipitously. The one-time student council representative who pressured administrators to change a college-wide policy is replaced by a résumé-stuffing bootlicker. (One undergraduate administrator confides that she doesn’t take even those serious REVELATION OF THE MONTH students too seriously, since they’ll soon graduate.) So the “I don’t think global centers geography of campus never settles. The must-read publication is contribute to the undergraduate this or that (or the other). The ’Stend becomes Havana Central at learning process. Students go out the West End. Even the century-old buildings’ names are changed to commercial centers in the rest of when a new donor or poorly-followed donation agreement presents the world, and all they get exposed itself. to is commercialism. They’re not Nevertheless, this magazine believes that an essentially going to learn the culture of those countries—they’ll take what’s im- Columbian spirit survives this turnover. The Blue and White exists to promulgate (and thereby propagate) that. mediately available in the current culture. It’s just academic tourism, and it doesn’t add up to anything.” — Conor Skelding –Wm. Theodore de Bary, in The Eye 4 THE BLUE AND WHITE NOVEMBER 2013 Postcard by Leila Mgaloblishvili 5 BLUE NOTES BLUE NOTES staff that he had 1700s. The next section whisks me two hundred already paid a large years into the future; it contains a letter from Milton sum of money in Halsey Thomas, the curator of Columbiana (a now exchange for guar- nonexistent collection of various Columbia para- anteed admission. phernalia, formerly housed in Low), to a Mr. Weston After hear- commissioned to design university shields. ing about Pap’s The scene came to me as I sat in the library: case, the admis- Milton Halsey Thomas, fresh from a letter from his sions office started mother extolling his brother’s accomplishments as to suspect that this Dean of Yale College, paces his office, assessing his scam inadequate, dissatisfactory life as it stands. Curator extended beyond one student, so they turned of a museum in a college ranked almost best in the to the federal authorities, notifying the State country, but just almost, he ponders how he might Department of the plot. The Director of Admissions, stop the voices of parents and peers barraging his lanet Kusfez is a pretty nice place. The Taaq With their high-minded acceptance they’ve created Frank H. Bowles, learned from his staff that the psyche. Pwho inhabit it live in peace, and are neither con- a haven, welcome in a school that can sometimes person who requested the application for Pap was not Looking up at the looming portrait of Samuel fined to bodies nor separated into sexes. Its purple feel as alienating as Tralfalmadore. The sign on the Mrs. Lang but a man who’d requested many applica- Johnson, our dear first university president, he oceans are just the right density for floating on library door: “Not too cool for you!” tions to be sent to students across Europe, and likely notices the crest at the upper-right hand corner, your back all day, zonked off the fruit of its Zerguh Still, I approached with caution. A relative had many affiliates like Mrs. Lang abroad. along with with the original iron crown from King’s tree, which returns you to the mental state of a two- noob when it comes to science fiction and fan- Yet the admissions office never found enough College in Chelsea under plate-glass next to his year-old, before language and self-consciousness tasy, I worried: “Will the librarian blast my head information about that man to discover the extent of desk, and an idea formulates in his head. He sits crept in. Too bad it’s out in the boondocks… a good off if I can’t answer The Last Question?” I felt deep the scam, and the case was forgotten. down and drafts a letter to his dear friend Weston, 7.31x1052 light-years away. Luckily, one of its space getting a bit deeper as she gazed into her After the fruitless investigation, the admis- and can’t help but mention the efficacy of Harvard, spores made its way to us. QuantumComp and I fiddled with my GNYSPhone. sions office decided to admit poor Pap anyway, say- Princeton, and Yale’s own coats-of-arms. The library of the Columbia University But then, we started talking. About books, movies, ing that “in the case of Pap, who had an excellent I’m disappointed. When applying to Science Fiction Society landed over 40 years ago. Lumpy Space Princess and how we hope to be the scholastic record, there was no question at all about Columbia, the shield seemed like a vestige of an After a particularly unstuck day mucking about in first eaten when Cthulhu awakens. Our voices rose. admitting him.” That Pap had the financial flexibil- ancient, honorable, and pretentious tradition: a deep space, I journeyed to the Student Government The corners of our mouths drew back, and our eyes ity to pay such an enormous sum for the application mark that the school to which I was applying was the Office to see what I’d find.
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