Lesson 6: the Love of Sex. Making Love

Lesson 6: The Love of Sex. Making love. Feeling Love. Being Love. AUDIO LESSON TRANSCRIPT

Welcome, it’s Tamra here for the final week of Sexual Self. Time always flies when you’re having this much fun! And pleasure. Do you agree? Or has stuff come up for you that has made this course tedious or frustrating or… not a priority? Whatever your experience thus far, is perfect! I spent years getting annoyed at my inability to hold pleasure in my body or be able to have those full body energetic experiences the so-called sex gurus speak of, so if this is how you’re feeling, just know it’s part of the journey, and as long as you continue to clear and tune in and explore your sexual landscape, you will start to feel more and more and more. There is no ‘I can’t do it’, there are only beliefs that get in the way of us having the experiences we desire. And please know that there is no limit to the pleasure you can feel. If you’re one of the people in the course who is really starting to go deep into their sexual self – that’s brilliant! But also know, that there is so much more to discover. There is ALWAYS so much more. Experimentation and feeling into your sexual self, letting your True Self guide you; that’s the best way to learn. Essentially all you’re doing is learning how to become more open, more in your heart and more connected to your body and your True Self. Don’t get caught up in needing to experience that out-of- body uber pleasurable orgasm, stay present to where you are in the moment and focus on connecting more deeply with that more intimate side of yourself. And every time you feel something new, even just the tinniest sensation, acknowledge it and be grateful for the experience.

MAKING LOVE I’ve saved the best for last and this is where we now get to talk about love, and love’s role in sex. And I’ll be honest here: in order to reach true orgasmic bliss at it’s greatest you do need to be in love with yourself, and this will be reflected in you being in love with your partner. Love is the final ingredient. Just like a meal that’s made with love; you can taste it. And this is how we want to experience sex. We want to feel the love pulsing through our entire being, not just our genitals. If the energy stays in our lower genital region we’re using sex to get off and get a sense of relief, but we’re not connected. Genital sex is about need. Great sex is about us – it’s about connecting. Being one. Hence why I call it heart-based sex. Genital sex is about my delight and what I want, but it’s not about the other person. Great spiritual sex is the coming together of two beings and the experience of oneness in a state of spirituality and deep love. Genital sex is a selfish energy. And sometimes that’s totally fine. But for loving and nurturing relationships, for depth and connection, you need to raise that energy and feel the spirituality of the sexual energy through the heart, through the throat, through your entire being; mind, body, spirit. Once you’ve had a spiritual orgasm, once you’ve felt that in your heart chakra, you’re not interested in genital sex any more. You want that full body spiritual experience. When you disconnect from your inner self, from your heart, then you end up feeling negative emotions or you feel drained, used and disconnected after sex. When you have a spiritual orgasm you may not feel anything in the genitals, because you’re coming from the heart; instead you experience oneness and bliss and enlightenment that a lot of people discuss. Therefore sex can be a vehicle to help you be one with all that is. When you connect with your heart it catapults those people involved, into oneness. Life is fabulous when we’re connected. You want to be coming from a place of giving and connection, not from a space of ‘what does my clitoris want?’ You want to feel your entire body vibrating, and feel ripples of healing energy filling you up. Now even if your partner hasn’t learnt these techniques, if his or her heart is open, it’s possible for you both to go to these orgasmic places, if… love is present. Essentially we are all one! The people we surround ourselves with are simply reflecting back to us, what we have going on. Therefore you can create the sexual experience for the two of you, if you stay in that loving space. And share it without

Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 1 of 10 conditions. So if you’re single, don't feel that you can’t have these deep experiences with your next partner because they haven’t learnt any of what I’ve shared with you. My partner – while I shared a lot with him – he didn’t know a tenth of what I’d learnt, yet he experienced a full body orgasm before I did – because I created that loving space where he felt safe enough to fully open his heart to me. So turning to page two of your playsheet, simply tune in now, and ask your True Self: What’s needed for me to fully open my heart to love? You may get insights and pearls of wisdom you need to hear to create that shift, you may get some beliefs you need to clear, you may be given some action steps you need to take or perhaps be taken on your own little journey. Be open to where your True Self wishes to take you. So take a moment now to ask your True Self what’s needed to fully open my heart to love? And write down the answer you get on your playsheet. What’s really important is that you realise that you and your lover are equal. You are not superior in any way, despite how much money you earn or how many sex courses you’ve taken part in. Any feeling of superiority is ego gunk stopping you from having a loving connection. Do not judge your partner for what they may or may not know or do. Be loving, share openly, without any need for them to adopt what you share. When you see your lover as an equal, you’re able to then enter a space that allows you to let go of being separate. No longer do you see them as a separate person with a separate identity and a separate body. You see them as made up of the same energy as you. You’re able to merge with them in a way that allows you to feel connected on a whole new level. Not as one person inside the other, but as in two energies becoming one. Because ultimately, at our core, we are all the same thing: Love. We want to be able to be love. To be able to be one with love. Because with love, there is no divide, there is no separateness. There is just one energy. And that is love. Love connects us. It is fear that separates us. And I encourage you to write that down. Love connects us. Fear separates us. So understanding this. Now ask your True Self: What do I need to know to be one with my current or future lover? And simply write down your answer on the space provided on your playsheet. Of course being able to fully embody this love for a partner is going to be somewhat difficult if you do not first love yourself. So, just to see if there’s anything else that you need to hear, simply ask your True Self: How can I love unconditionally, myself and others? What do I need to clear, do, and know? Please ask this last question everyday for the next week. Self-love is a lifelong journey. It can always be deeper. Yummier. And more nourishing. No matter how many circus tricks a man pulls from his magic penis-hat, a woman will never feel satisfied to her core, if heartfelt love is not present. Despite what many men will claim, neither will they feel that deep satisfaction either. Sex without love, leaves us wanting. Like I’ve explained, sex without love is generally restricted to the genitals. Physical in-out sex is relatively easy. Yet sexual love requires more than genital connection; it requires a heartfelt presence. While some people may be sexually open, their hearts are often extremely guarded or shut down. That’s why sex without love has limitations. Before most men have had a chance for their sexual energy to rise to their heart, they’ve ejaculated the sexual energy out of them. When a woman’s heart is truly open to a man, her vagina flowers open and her genitals gush like a swollen river. So I just want you to ask your True Self one final question. And that is: How do I make love from the heart? And write down the answer you get. Essentially it is this love that will allow a man to orgasm without ejaculating, as we’ve been discussing all course. This is because he’ll be more in his body as opposed to just in his genitals, and he’ll also be in the energetic frequency of love, which is pure pleasure, without the unconscious need to get rid of that pleasure. Which is essentially what an ejaculation is, a shutting down of pleasure, if not for the purpose of creating a child. For the ladies, in order for them to have a full body cervical orgasm, they do need to feel love. So let’s now discuss the cervical or full body orgasms available to women.

CERVICAL/FULL BODY ORGASMS Now you’ve heard me talk about heart-gasms at various points in this course. Essentially what I believe to be a heart-gasm, is an orgasmic experience that fills the heart with ecstatic pleasure and spreads Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 2 of 10 throughout the entire body. Just as our physical heart pumps blood around the body, so does the energetic heart pump pleasure around the body, if it is the centre of our pleasure. The heart-gasm ultimately is the fullest of the orgasms and the most spiritual and pleasurable and transforming. It really is the complete connection of mind, body, soul and connects you on such a deep deep level. Some ladies describe this orgasm as a shower of stars, where they feel boundary-less. As if they can’t tell where they end and where everything else begins. And because the cervix in a woman is where you’ll find the reflexology point for the heart, it makes sense that awakening the cervix through gentle touch, will help a women experience those heart-gasms, also know as cervical orgasms or full body orgasms. You’ll find the cervix is at the top of the vaginal canal. When a penis or a dildo is deep inside you, you may feel it hitting up against the cervix. Now often the cervix is overlooked as a pleasure zone, hence why it can be a little tender when you first begin giving this area attention. So my advice is to begin with gentle massage like with the G-spot. And when I say gentle, I mean as soft as you would touch the face of a newborn baby. Feather-soft strokes is what we’re after. Most women hold a lot of trauma, which plays out by way of tension and pain, in the cervix. So chances are you may feel pain before you experience pleasure. Simply be with the feelings. Don’t do hard and fast with the cervix, as this numbs this cervix, and creates more trauma. Like I said, soft. Super soft. You can even just hold a steady pressure on the cervix, without any movement, and that can be enough to open the cervix to pleasure. The Jade Egg practice – or the Yoga for the Vagina practice I’ve created using a Jade Egg - is also really great for opening up this area. It brings attention and awareness to your cervix. When you wake up those muscles through using the Jade Egg, building new neural pathways, you’ll engage more of the cervix. And when you learn how to sip the egg up and down the vaginal canal, it will also stimulate the cervix. Now it’s really important also, that you’re completely aroused before you start playing with the cervix. That’s really really important. And it could take 45 or so minutes before you start to feel pleasure there. So be patient and present. Now while the clitoris has 8000 nerve endings, but just one nerve – the pudendal nerve – running up into the brain, the cervix has three nerves running up into the brain. So while the cervix may be less sensitive than the clitoris to begin with, once it awakens there’s actually massive potential to light up the brain, hence why you have so much access to your creativity. The cervix really is a super highway to creativity and to feminine power and wisdom. It’s the inner most core of a woman – in the Taoist philosophy it’s her heart point like we learnt last week – so it really does open up her heart. That’s often why a cervical orgasm can bring with it, intense feelings of love, ecstasy, transcendence, even tears. Not tears of pain, but tears of joy, or breaking through something; like you’ve let go of a lot of emotional gunk. That’s why you need to be with a partner you feel safe enough to take you there without judgement. While the clitoral orgasm is more of a physical experience, the G-spot more of an emotional experience, the cervical orgasm is more of a spiritual orgasm, and this is where you’re able to experience those full body orgasms, or what I like to call, a heart-gasm. Energetically there is a meridian channel that leads from the cervix all the way up to the crown chakra, so in opening the cervix you’re gaining access to your spiritual self and all that is. Some people describe a cervical orgasm like being reborn or like a complete mind, body, psyche reboot. You’ll feel spiritually open and awake. Love gushing forth; being so in your heart, you feel completely at one with the world and the person you’re with. You will be left feeling energised or peaceful and blissed out. You may be left shaking for days after. It really is the ultimate orgasmic experience for transcendence and deep spiritual healing and bliss. So for homeplay this week, your objective is to wake up your cervix. Keep using the Jade Egg, but also dedicate some time, daily if you can, or at least three times a week, to massaging the cervix. Get your partner to do it, or do it yourself with a finger if you can reach or a non-vibrating dildo. And really massage it, for a good 15-20 minutes.

Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 3 of 10 Now if your cervix has been removed, I still want you to do this exercise. Energetically there is still a cervix there as well as scar tissue. So massage that area to life; you won’t miss out because you don’t have a cervix. Like I said, you do, it just may not be physically there.

ENERGY SEX I’ve mentioned a LOT about energetic orgasms throughout this course, and like I said, everything you have learnt thus far, is designed to open you to experiencing yourself as energy, so you can indulge in energetic pleasure, which ultimately, goes beyond anything you can experience physically. You’ve probably heard me talk about the great Taoist teacher Mantak Chia, who says he can make love to his wife while sitting across the room from her. Now this idea isn’t as crazy as it may sound. Understanding ourselves as energy, can be quite difficult. I get that. When I first heard about it, it was a little beyond my believable radar. But if you take someone who is ticklish, it just takes one tiny touch of the toe for a big man to be jumping around all over the place. This is just one example of energy. Of course tickling and being tickled is something that we’ve been brought up with, so we don't think twice about it. We’ve been taught from the moment we were born that we live in a physical world. Yet if you take a big enough looking glass you soon realise that there is more space than matter, and what that tells me, is that we’re actually living in an energetic world, and the physical world is the illusion. Yet we’ve been taught that it’s the opposite way around. Once we understand the truth, we can start to feel into the frequency of different things. Everything is just energy vibrating at a different frequency, and that’s what we see as a physical form. The more you tune into yourself, the more beliefs you clear, the more attuned to energy you’ll become. Once you get to this point you’re able to create your own orgasmic experiences, instead of relying on something or someone external to trigger off the waves of euphoria. The reason for this, is because energy is what creates the response. The more you tune into it, the more this subtle energy expands. The most subtle energy can create deep healings, deep shifts in our psyche. Of course, feeling this energy does require letting go of what’s in your mind so you can tune in to what’s in your body. Being fully present with your body and your partner – that’s when energy starts to move. A person needs to be willing to stay in their body. If you stay in your body - as opposed in your mind - you will have an energy experience. If you check out, you’re an empty vessel. As we’ve talked about, having an energy experience is more about being than doing. As soon as we identify with the mind, we disconnect from the body and thus the energy. Yet in today’s world we’ve been taught to believe that the mind’s thoughts are who we are. When they are not. Now what you also need to realise here, is the more you want this energetic experience, the more you strive for it, the harder it will be to get. Sounds crazy doesn’t it, when we’ve learnt that if we want something, we just go out and get it. Not so, when it comes to energy and energetic experiences. So STOP trying and just focus on connecting into the body, while letting go of expectations. To have an energetic orgasm, you need to release beliefs about what is possible and your associations with sex so that the energy can flow naturally. Hence why that has been a huge focus this entire course. It’s not something that can be forced; it’s something that simply arises within us, as we surrender into the moment. When you’re truly connected to your True Self – the energy will be moving – and you will have an orgasmic experience. If you do have any shame or fear or blocks around sex, it will cause you to contract and that squishes the flow of energy, hence why you need to clear all of these sexual barriers and limiting beliefs to help you access these types of bliss. So once this course ends, please go over your notes, and do any clearing work you’ve not yet done. And keep tuning in to find out what else needs to be cleared. Whatever you do, DON’T compare yourself to others, as this is not helpful. Comparison is not coming from a tuned in space, it is ego, and wont help you here. It will only push you further from what you want. So for homplay this week, you will see that you are to clear any beliefs around energy being woo woo or airy fairy or unreachable. Energy is what gets us up everyday, it’s our life force energy. You’ve been Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 4 of 10 experiencing the effects of energy when you do your Love Wrap. We know when we’re low on energy, as we feel tired, drained. And we can boost our energy if we know how to cultivate that. So I’ll get you to tune in now, and simply ask your True Self: What’s the biggest belief getting in the way of me experiencing energetic sex? And if you’re already having energetic orgasmic experiences, ask: What’s the biggest belief stopping me going deeper into my energetic experiences? Now simply ask: What do I need to know right now, to know without a doubt, that energetic orgasmic experiences are available to me? If you’ve been doing all your homeplay, these energetic sexual experiences will start to happen organically. For some they will take longer than others. Just know that investing time in your sexual self in this way is the most nourishing thing you can do, and when you are fully ready, the bliss of energetic orgasms will be yours. Don’t try to rush the process. Getting attached to having sex looking a certain way, is one of the worst things you can do. Essentially the key is this: Enter through form, exit from form. So enter the person physically, then exit from the physical so you can be spiritually there with your partner, or in solo sex, with yourself. We use sex to free ourselves from form, just as we use meditation to do the same thing. Instead of seeing ourselves as a body that contains sexual energy, we realise we are the sexual energy. So when you make love, make contact with your partner’s energy as much as their body. This is what will bring out all their refined qualities. The ultimate aim is to transcend all the techniques I’ve taught you; to get so good at them that you move beyond form and pattern and simply do what’s natural. Just know that thinking only gets in the way of our body’s wisdom. No words can teach you how to make love; they can only guide you. The actual learning comes in the ‘doing’. Allowing your heart to guide you in your sexual practice. As one Zen saying says: ‘Paths cannot be taught, they can only be taken.’ What you will probably find at times is that during some encounters there will be barely any movement, yet the energy is so ripe, so full and expansive – that you’re able to ride this delicious orgasmic wave. An onlooker may see this as ‘Ahhh, they’re not doing anything’. Yet there is so much going on you cannot see. You’re doing so much, you’re just using a different part of yourself. So instead of using the physical body to have sex, you’re using the energetic self to have sex. We’re re-learning how to use that side of us, which gets repressed, not given any attention, but scientists are starting to realise that the energetic exchange is having a much more profound effect with people, both sexually and non-sexually. You’ll get to a point where you feel a huge release that’s not dependent on a particular spot being stimulated. It won’t feel like anything you’ve experienced before, because until now, you’ve experienced life as a physical being, not an energetic being. So again, and I can’t say this enough, don’t try to imagine what it will feel like, just be open to be taken somewhere new. If you’re having sex with a partner in this way, you can be so connected in sex that later that day when you’re both at work, you’re still feeling that energy connection. You can be left vibrating for days after, feeling at peace, my husband says it was like he felt Zen for about three days after this happened the first time. These energetic experiences are transformational. They raise your vibration and when you raise your vibrational energy, your body behaves very differently. So if you want to get naturally high, this is the kind of sex that is your drug of choice.

CHAKRAS This leads me into talking about our chakras. Now chakras are the energy centres in our body where energy flows through. There are seven of them, there are actually another five chakras that are outside of the body, but for the purpose of this course, we will just look at the seven in our body and the effect they have on our sex life. Now the chakras, while energetic, happen to be located in areas of the body where most of our nerve endings come together, which is interesting in itself. The reason I introduce you briefly to chakras in this course, is because understanding the health or the consciousness of our chakras allows us to understand the relationship between our physical self and energetic self. For instance, when a particular chakra is not working properly, we can experience such symptoms as physical illness, relationship breakdowns or financial concerns. Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 5 of 10 Getting your chakras balanced and working will not only help your sex life but everything in your life. And I have included a visualisation to use to help clear your chakras and get the energy moving through your entire self more freely so you can experience more pleasure. I’m going to suggest you do this visualisation everyday for the next week, and then once a week from this point forward. That said, the more you do it, the better the results you’ll notice. So aside from the array of health and personal benefits you’ll gain from using this visualisation, you will unblock any stuck energy, so you can experience those yummy full body and energetic orgasms too. And so you know, the chakra system came straight from tantric philosophy; you may have heard of kundalini energy or a kundalini awakening. Essentially this is when the energy dances up your spine from your base chakra at the bottom of your spine, all the way to your crown chakra on top of your head. The point of having a kundalini awakening is to help bring you back to your core self, to be free of ego and be one with all that is. To live in that ecstatic place of transcendent love and bliss; all of what we’ve been working towards in this course. Stripping off the gunk stopping us from being able to surrender into our True Self and live in this enlightened way. You can see a diagram of on your playsheet of where all seven chakras are, and we’ll go through them now, to give you a basic understanding of their role in our life, and especially our sexual life. Please feel free to take notes in the space provided.

The first chakra – also known as the base chakra or the root chakra – is the foundation of the whole chakra system and is located at the base of the spine between the anus and the genitals for men (the prostate reflex point), and the G-spot for women. The root chakra’s job is to look after the spine, hips, legs, feet as well as our physical body in general. Essentially each one of us is a spiritual being in a physical body sent here to Earth School to learn lessons. It is our base chakra that anchors us here on earth. It’s what grounds us in our bodies and is needed to balance the spiritual energies in the higher chakras. It makes sure we have everything we need in order to survive in this physical form; shelter, finances, a positive community or tribe. You know this chakra is strong if you feel at home in yourself, are secure, stable and connected to your body. If you tend to feel nervous or fearful then your root chakra is probably under-active, or overactive if you are materialistic or greedy. Another sign of your base chakra needing some attention is the desire to check out. People with depression and especially those who try to commit suicide have a weak base chakra. Our raw, lusty, primal, sexual drive comes from this chakra – and this chakra conducts energy from the base of the spine into the hips, legs and feet. The Jade Egg practice and the men’s penis exercises such as the Penis Pull Ups are all sexercises that help strengthen this root chakra. When you do these sexercises they strengthen and tone the pelvic floor so less energy is leaked out.

Our Second chakra – also known as the sacral chakra or sex chakra – is centred between the genitals and the naval in the area of the sacrum. It’s responsible for our sexual organs – so our ovaries and testicles – the kidneys, bladder, bowel, the large intestine, pelvis and lower abdomen. This chakra is known as our pleasure centre, controlling our feelings and sexuality. This second chakra helps you discover who you are as an individual, what you desire, and what brings you pleasure. You know this chakra is balanced if you easily draw what you desire into your life so you can experience delight. You’ll be open to intimacy and are passionate and lively. If your life is not pleasurable, then your second chakra is not doing its job properly. People with a weak chakra two tend to shut down or suppress their sexuality and can even be frigid or shy or have a ‘poker face’ when it comes to engaging in sex. You probably won’t be emotionally open to others either. Those with an overactive chakra two are known to use sex as a currency or have obsessions with sex. They may also feel emotionally attached to other people. This chakra is also associated with guilt and sexual shame. We live in a world where we are starved of pleasure and are taught to feel guilt and shame for wanting to feel pleasure. If this is you, then you know your chakra two needs some TLC. I have asked you to clear shame and guilt, but if there’s any Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 6 of 10 remnants still lurking around, please go a little deeper on it this week. You want to be able to let go and enjoy yourself. If sex is a healthy part of your life, then that’s a good sign, but if sex is non-existent or lacklustre or you simply don’t make time for it, again, you know your chakra two needs some lovin’. Not feeling sexy can also be associated with an out of balance chakra two – you may even wonder how anyone could find you desirable. People with out-of-whack chakra twos can also have a tendency to attract the wrong lovers into their lives and be left feeling like they’ll never find ‘The One’. Chakra two also deals with passions and instinct. When the sex chakra is stimulated, the sex glands respond by nourishing and fuelling the rest of the endocrine system with potent hormones. The challenge for every man is to keep the sex hormones circulating in the body. This is where ejaculation control and seminal retention comes into play. The energy must be kept inside for it to move up the chakras.

Chakra three – is also called the solar plexus or stomach chakra – and is found in the stomach region above the naval. It governs the stomach, the whole digestive system, the liver, gallbladder, spleen and pancreas. Chakra three is all about personal power and its job is to make sure we conduct our life in accordance with what we believe in. It acts like our own personal bodyguard, protecting our own moral integrity so we don’t get tangled up in other people’s beliefs. Those ‘gut feelings’ you get, are chakra three’s way of protecting you from anything that could harm you. That’s how chakra three communicates to us, through gut feelings. If you have a strong sense of self and communicate well, this is a sign of a healthy chakra three. A fear of rejection is due to an under active chakra three, as is an inability to set firm boundaries. You’ll probably question yourself and your decisions. On the other hand, controlling, manipulative and bullying behaviours are symptomatic of an over active chakra three. Essentially chakra three’s life lesson is to stand up for what you want in life and not take on other people’s gunk. The power chakra, as it is also known, is very much about raw emotions such as fear and power issues that deal directly with self-esteem. One of the best times to empower a lover with beautiful affirmations to heal self-esteem issues is just before, during or immediately after orgasm, as the subconscious is readily available for reprogramming. What I’m saying, is saying positive statements, like ‘You are beautiful’ or if making love with yourself ‘I am a divine being of love’, are a great way to strengthen chakra three. It can be easy to get caught up in what you’re experiencing but saying positive words as you cum, really can have a huge healing effect on the psyche.

The fourth chakra – our heart chakra – is located in the centre of the chest, and looks after the thymus gland, the circulatory system, blood, the lungs and keeps your heart open and loving. It does this by acting as a type of purification system cleansing all of your chakras of negative emotions and keeping your entire energy field positive so all you love flows easily into your life. When the heart if open you are compassionate and friendly and you work at harmonious relationships. When it is under active you are cold and distant. If over active, you are likely to suffocate people with your love and your love probably has quite selfish reasons or you might sabotage your relationships with distrust or anger. Not being able to commit to another person is another sign of an out of balance chakra four. Giving strangers, friends and lovers smiles and heart-felt hugs are great ways to activate this chakra, as is telling your loved one how much you love them and of course clearing out and letting go of old hurts. It also gets a boost when you do things in life that you love. With the opening of the heart chakra, ego boundaries begin to dissolve and there is an emerging desire to be more at one with the world. Unconditional love is possible at this level of consciousness. However it must be noted that the heart area is often heavily guarded to avoid feelings of pain and suppressed feelings and emotional scarring. Those issues need to be healed and cleared before the heart chakra will be fully open to give and receive unconditional love.

Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 7 of 10 Moving onto the fifth chakra – or throat chakra – you’ll find this chakra near the centre of the throat. It governs the throat, thyroid, neck, jaw, teeth and tongue. This is the centre where dynamic communication takes place and chakra five’s job is to help you find your authentic and individual voice and express it. When this chakra is open you won’t have any problems being and expressing all that your True Self is. When it is under active you will tend to hold back from speaking your truth and may be introverted or shy. Not speaking your truth will block this chakra. If the chakra is over active you will probably tend to speak too much and domineer people, thus keeping them at a distance. Chakra five deals with creativity, self-expression and the awesome ability to speak your truth even at risk of being different to others. When directing energy up, you must continually release the buildup of muscular tension in the neck and shoulders since this is the area where blocked energy often resides. Tension there will inhibit the orgasmic flow, while making sound during sex, and speaking your truth will help activate this chakra. When you learn how to sing, they teach you how to breathe into your diaphragm to open your body. Endorphins are great for our cells, whereas adrenalin has a low vibrational frequency. Everything is a vibration. Everything in the universe is a sound wave. When we’re singing our sexual song, we’re resonating with higher chakras of the body. So the more we surrender to our experience, the more our sounds will change to match it. If you suppress sound you’re stopping the flow of energy.

Chakra six – also known as the third eye – is located smack bang in between your two eyebrows at the top of your nose. This chakra governs the pituitary gland, the pineal gland, the skull, eyes, nose, brain, nervous system and the senses. This is your intuitive centre or the mind’s inner eye; it’s your inner compass. Flashes of insight come when this chakra is in balance. To be able to tune in effectively to your partner, you need to have this chakra clear. When this chakra is balanced you have good intuition and tuning in delivers you deep insights and psychic ability. If under active you’re not good at thinking for yourself and may tend to rely on authorities for answers. You may be rigid in your thinking, relaying on beliefs too much and you may get easily confused. You may feel spiritually lost and not connected to your purpose in life. If this chakra is over active you may live in a world of fantasy too much. Visualising and tuning in are two great ways to activate this chakra in life, and in sex. Essentially the job of this chakra is to teach you the power of insight so you can heal yourself.

And finally we have chakra seven – also known as the crown chakra, which is on top of your head. It looks after the pineal gland, your brain and your nervous system. The job of this chakra is to awaken you to the truth of who you really are; a being of love and light, temporarily housed in a body, experiencing earth for a while. When you experience peace and know you at one with everything that is, then your crown chakra is working well. If under active you won’t be very spiritually aware. If over active you are probably intellectualising too much. Living as your True Self, where you are tuned in every moment of every day, is what will balance this chakra, along with allowing yourself to be in a state of stillness often. This chakra connects us to spiritual enlightenment. This is where pure consciousness can be experienced. This is where sexuality turns into spirituality when you’re circulating your energy up this high. Once this is flowing freely your experience of orgasm will be more spiritual, perhaps even out of body like. Like I said before, the cervix has a meridian that runs all the way up to your crown chakra – therefore cervical massage and awakening that area can help you balance your crown chakra.

The problem we face, is most of the time, people are only activating their first chakra in sex, maybe second, and keeping all the sexual energy refined to the genital region. So what we’re looking to do here, is clear the way up the body so the sexual energy can travel throughout all the chakra centres. This is the key to those full body experiences – having clear and balanced chakras. Whether you believe in chakras or not, it doesn't really matter. Essentially the exercises I will give you are working with the chakras, but just visualising the energy moving up using this process is where the Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 8 of 10 magic happens. So for homeplay this week I’d like everyone to tune into each chakra individually, and clear that chakra as you would a sick body part. Then listen to the Chakra Love visualisation every day for the next week, and then weekly thereafter to keep those chakras spinning and happy. Chakras affect our lives in so many different ways. If, for example, your first chakra is out of sync, then you’re likely to experience financial worries, as chakra 1 is connected to our survival in this world. With the skills you have you can tune into your chakras and clear them yourself, which is part of your homeplay this week. And the more clearing you do of your chakras using this technique, the more your life will flow in general.

LIVING AS YOUR SEXUAL SELF Before we wrap up and go into your homeplay, I’d like to touch on living as your Sexual Self. As you know the purpose of the Remarkable Relationships course was to introduce you to True Self and start to build a relationship with YOU. Now you want to allow yourself to live as your sexy True Self 24 seven. Once we begin to understand that we are of the very thing we’re looking for, we can desire without making sex the goal. We can let our sex life result naturally from the way we live our life. So instead of thinking: ‘I have to get laid tonight’, ‘I have to reach climax’ or ‘I have to give my partner multiple orgasms’, you simply live life from a place of passion. You absorb what you’re doing. You don’t try to do it, it just happens naturally. The Chinese call this principle wu wei: ‘Doing without doing’. So instead of seeing sexuality as an actual act of sex that happens a couple of times a week, start surrounding yourself with an ever simmering sexual energy, pulsing just underneath your daily life and infusing itself into everything you do. Feel the sass and sparkle in drinking that cup of tea, enjoy the pleasures of the wind rustling through your hair as you dash to the train. There’s a list of ways of how to put the sex into your life on your playsheet, so have a play with those and come up with your own ways to really embody your True Sexual Self and live a life of pleasure. If you’re in a relationship, ensure you keep your sexual connection with your partner hovering at a simmer. So if 0 is freezing and 10 is boiling, you want to think about keeping your sexual energy with your partner between a 5 and 8. For me 5 is actually danger-zone. When it hits a five you want to plan a romantic weekend away! You want your sexual energy to always be simmering, because if it drops, it can be really hard to pick back up. Keep it simmering between you; one of the ways you can do this is sexual affection. You grab their butt as you’re walking by. As they’re washing the dishes you come up behind and hug them while breathing softly on their neck. Send sexy text messages or leave sexy love notes for them. Be a little random but playful and most of all, have fun with it. Keep the pot simmering every moment of every day instead of going from cold to hot. Make sure you have a continuous supply of turn-on. Our sexual energy really is a part of our spiritual energy! So tuning in right now, simply ask your True Self: How do I keep my pot of sexual energy simmering every moment of everyday? You’ll see space at the bottom of page 12 to write your answer. Tuning in and asking: How do I keep my pot of sexual energy simmering every moment of everyday? Beautiful! So lets now finish up on your homeplay.

HOMEPLAY Both the ladies and the gents are to tune in and clear each of their chakras, and then do the chakra love visualisation every day for the next week, to get your chakras nice and fit and balanced. Tune in daily on self-love, asking your True Self: How can I deepen my self-love? Remove any beliefs that come up during this lesson and any others that you notice during the week. Remember, the more you ask your True Self to take you deeper, to give you more beliefs to clear, the yummier your experiences will become. I can’t say enough, how important it is to continue tuning in and clearing using a pen and paper – because that allows for much deeper insight and realisation than if you tune in without a pen and paper. For the ladies you’ll see some additional Jade Egg eggsercises and you also want to spend some time massaging your cervix to life. And for everyone, the big message is, play with your sexual energy. Feel into it. Let it come to life. And most importantly start living as your sexual self where you can feel the Copyright @ 2018 Tamra Mercieca & Getting Naked Pty Ltd. All rights reserved. SS Lesson 1 Transcript 9 of 10 hum of sexual energy every moment of every day. Let pleasure be your way of life.

Now this is the last lesson, however you will see there is another playsheet next week giving you more tips and tools on how to move forward without my weekly guidance. Know that what you see in me, is in you, and you are the one who has the key to deep heart-felt pleasure. Thankyou so much for your time and energy. I’ve had so much fun sharing and chatting with you about our sexual spiritual selves. If you do want to go deeper with me and feel like you could benefit from some one-on-one sessions, please get in contact as I do offer a mentoring program. But just know, that putting pressure on yourself to feel something a particular way, will only block you from having those deeper orgasmic experiences. So really give yourself permission to go at your own pace, knowing that what you’re experiencing at this point in time is perfect. Indulge in your own growth, stay true to your True Self, and pleasure will unfold. So please enjoy all I have shared. Continue your daily sexual practices, live as your True Sexual Self, and I will leave you with this quote by Chris Griscom: ‘If you lift your sexual energy up into your heart, you will begin to feel the giggle of your ageless body.’