2 J ~h( Q1)rrrnt I OCTOBER 24, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I NEWS lthrQ:u rr t VOL. 45, ISSUE 1358 WWW.THECURRENT-ONLIN E.COM

EDITORIAL h dark history of Provincial House: Editor-in-Chief ...... Matthew B. Poposky Managing Editor...... Janaca Scherer News Editor...... Minho Jung a nting tales true or utterly false? Features Editor...... Ashley Atkins Sports Editor...... Owen Shroyer HAll FLiNTROP Staff Writer A&E Editor...... Cate Marquis Opinions Editor...... Jeremy Zschau Stories about deaths, House is home to the nuns worked as nurses. Hall's namesake, and two Copy Editors ...... Sara Novak, Johanna Hoffarth cemeteries, boiler rooms, Pierre Laclede Honors The building which is now of her friends drowned Staff Writers ...... David von Nordheim, infirmaries, funerals, College. "If there is any Oak Hall, immediately while ice skating on a lake. Greg Laine, Yusef Roach, Ryan Krull, Maddie Harned, Endea underground tunnels and building on campus likely to the south of Provincial That lake was on south Wilbert, Angie O'Dell, Eli Dains, Dan Spak, Mavis Hollis, Sha­ mental hospitals around to have ghosts, it is this House, used to function campus behind the current ron Pruitt, Joseph Grate, Aladeen Klo nowski, Hali Flintrop Provincial House have one," Roben Bliss, Dean as an infirmary for aging location of Provincial long been passed behvixr of Pierre Laclede Honors sisters, and it is a safe House near the current DESIGN students at the' University College, said, in reference hypothesis that some died location of the University Photo Editor...... Jennifer Meahan of Missouri - St. Louis. to Provincial House. Dean there. "The rooms have Meadows Apartments. Web Editor...... Yusef Roach People who witness ghosts Bli.ss' office used to serve a distinct hospital-room Despite these features Staff Photographers ...... Nikki Vahle, Jarred Gastreich, around Provincial House as a funeral site. "Before feel," Dierkes said. of and events associated Sarah Lowe, Erica Thompson have spoken up from Uf\.fSL bought Provincial Also buried in with Provincial House, Illustrators ...... Karlee Sellars time to time, creating House, the building served Provincial House is a Dean Bliss and Dierkes rumors about the mysteries as a nunnery to the Sisters human remains laboratory. still do not believe it is behind the buildng. "Is it of Charity. Unbeknmvnst In what used ro be the haunted. "The building BUSINESS just a rumor?" has been to most Honors College nunnery library now sit is very old and it creaks. a question for a long students, the heavily shelves and shelves of If you're someone who is Business Manager ...... John Wallace time, likely since students trafficked Provincial House bones, right under the gh'ost-inclined, it would be Distribution Manager...... Ryan Krull first picked the story up common room was the Provincial House's south very easy to think you hear Advisor ...... Charlotte Petty somewhere. reception room of the campus dining hall. a few shades wandering Truthfully, they are funeral whenever a nun According to Dierkes, around. I'm slightly CONTACT US all part of the history died," Daron Dierkes, the bones, which were skeptical on the subject of Provincial House. graduate, history, said.. found close to the city of ghosts, but I could be Address 388 MSC, 1 University Blvd Many people have died Dean Bli.ss' office held the of St. Louis likely convinced," Dean Bliss Saint Louis, MO 63121-4400 on campus for different casket. This rumor \vas belonged to a group of said. Newsroom 314-516-5174 reasons. M.lny of those confirmed by Dean Bliss French-Catholics, but the "I don't think Provincial Business/Advertising 314-516-5316 deaths can be' traced back himsel[ as ~ell. graves were unmarked. Ho use is haunted by Fax 314-516-681'1 to the immediate area of There are other features At the time they ,vere nuns,"Dierkes sai~, " But E-mail (General) [email protected] Provincial Hou.se, and of Provincial House found, neither any local if it was, I am sure the E-mail (Advertising) [email protected] their spirits could still be left over from its past cemeteries nor the St. ghosts would be very nice, E-mail (Employment Inquiries) [email protected] there. Accoding to many as a nunnery. There is a Louis Arch Diocese wanted pleasant ladies." E-mail (Tips) [email protected] people, the:,; are. cemetery where many of to take responsibility Despite all the factual Twitter umslcurrent Even before the the Sisters of Charity were for the bones so Utv1SL evidences in the area's Facebook The Current University of Missouri­ buried. from as early as the took them. The bones history, the mysteries and St. Louis took ownership early 1900's to as recendy are sometimes studied rumors about Provincial A BOUT ltl1c Q}}ITrnt of south campus land as 2003. There are also the by students in the House have still rema.ined The Current is the student newspaper at the Universi ty of Missouri­ and Provincial House, remains of an underground anthropology department. unsolved. Surely, there will St. Lou is, printing \:veekly through the fall and sprin g semesters on according to a few varied tunnel very near the Provincial House is be people who claim they Mondays. Advertising rates are available upon request; terms, condi­ accounts of histOry, cemetery which leads also near the site of a saw something around the tions and restrictions app ly. The Current, financed in part by student Provincial House had past a b~iler room to the drowning. At nine years building. However, as it acti vities fees, is not an official pu blication of UM-St. Louis. plenty of opportunities to now closed St. Vincent's ' of age, Nancy Lucas of stands, the evidence is all The University is not responsible for the content of The Current and/ accrue ghosts. Provincial Sanitarium, where the the Lucas family, Lucas circumstantial at best. or its policies. All materials contained in each printed and online is­ sue are property' of The Current and may not be reprinted, reused , or reproduced without the prior, expressed and written consent of The Corrections and our sincere apologies Current. The Current regrets that sometimes in our making of this The Current accepts letters to the editor. All letters should be brief, publication, we make mistakes. What we do not regret is and those not exceeding 250 words will be given preference. The Cur­ correcting our mistakes. Please let us knoUJ ofany corrections rent edits letters for clarity and length, not for dialect, correctness, in­ that need to be made. tent or grammar. All letters must be signed and must include a daytime phone number and, where applicable, student number. The Editor-i n­ Chief reserves the right to respond to and to deny any letters. AFFILIATIONS MON. 76 TUES. 81 WED. SAT. MCMA 58

CP.~~ ;:o U (XI.~~ HI" 56 55 40 NEWS I I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I OCTOBER 24, 2011 l1:hc ~rrrnt I 3 Chancellor George is re-elected chairman of GLVC Pres"denf's Council MINHO JUNG News Editor

Tomas F. George, levels were appreciated in matters. "1 think the school is at chancellor of University the consideration for the "The conference goes the turning point in athletic of Missouri-St. Louis, was election this yesr. through the scheduling of . programs. Last year, we won re-elected chairman of the "[As a chancellor or the [whole] process. It is more games than we lost. president's council of the president], you are expected done through the council '''\fle crossed over that critical Great Lake Valley Confer­ to service outside of region, presidents and athletic di­ barrier [at this point]. I ence after having served [sometimes] at a regional or rectors and also the faculty think people in the confer­ 2 years for his first term, national level. That is part athletic representatives," ence are starting ro recog­ which started in 2009. of your activity and it gives George said. "What 1 do is nize us even more," George "I was elected two years me more experiences that I to oversee all the activities said. ago [for the first time]," can give back to the cam­ and semi-annual meetings: U M SL has el v n George said. [The duty] is a pus," George said. ' I can I [also] represent us to the sports [earns. The school is t\\'o-year appointment. So, I also advertise and promote eAA in key issue , which considering bringing men's had it for the laSt two years the campus wher r am; it is headquarrered ill lncUa­ and women's swimm ing and I was re-elected by m,' enables me to be a better napoli. [ l[irnat 1 ). my teams back to th proa-ram coil agues, including other chancellor b erving on job is simpl. t 0 \ er e and rose r. The expans' n f th chancellors and pre.sid nts." these different b ie." m ake sure ev r hing goes gym and construction of a The Great Lakes Valle. G[ C is in charge of the corr cd . > separate w lIness center for Conference is the biggest nirt -grirrJ' of all the games The result f haneel­ tuden ts are al und go­ college athletjc conference from scheduling the games lor G e rge s re-ele tion is ing scrutin) thrOlwh surv . 5 at NCAA Division ~ level, to the) earl.' budgeting. expe ted to bring more and discussion before which covers the Central One of the main responsi­ recognition t the seho [ the de is ions inc1 udino­ United States, from 1\ fis­ bilities of GLVC is to over­ from me ehool acr s swimming te. ms, are made. souri to Indiana. see hO\ the different team the boundaq f rat of " "Pr babJ)' n t in th imm- M any achievements perform concerning the 1iss uri. Sine athletic diate furu re, ' o ro-e said. \\ hich ha\ e been m:lde dur­ rules and regulations. As a p rograms of the I . re "Ri a-hr now, in [he imm dj - ina- Chancellor George's first chairman of the presidents' at a ero sroad thi e em [ fu m re W aD pr bably tenure as chair of the GL C council Chancellor G eorge is expected to bring more Slicking w ith eleven [reams] . posit.ive term of But. \ ho know ? In 'a m re council and his proactive take charg s of making all effcC[ in Tom Gellrge is rl.'- I CI 1 chaimlan f r th pre 'dem's engagements w ithin the the final decisions con­ team spirits and (he Out­ distant future we could council of ihe GLVC. COURTESY OF RYAN HEINZ community at difFerent cerning the organization come of the games. have orne m ore pons."

"What are you looking forward to the most about Halloween?"

itA fun party for Halloween Jinhwa Kim "Seeing my five month old Anthony "Pretending I'm 12 and with funny costumes. " in her first costume." Public Policy Admin Kim Jones International Business trick or treating!" Graduate Economics Senior Senior 41 ~hf [:untnt I OCTOBER 24, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONlINE.COM I I NEWS UMSL students participate in Occupy St. Louis, seeking social c anges for equal opportunities and pursuit of fair society for all A stream of the "Occupy Movement," birthed on Wall Street, occupies Keiner Plaza, reaches University of Missouri-St. Louis; frustrated student activists demand change from government

BADIAEAD Staff \Nriter

The Occupy Wall Street popular manifestation of People cook, clean, eat, movement, which began the anger at this rampant sleep, and talk with people and has remained firmly injustice happening in the they \,,lQuld otherwise nev­ entrenched in the financial country." er look twice at. Decisions district of New York City Stein, who went to are made horizontally, and since September 17, has show solidarity with the power is held equally by all spread to cities all around union-sponsored march of the occupiers." the counuy, including St. on Friday, October 14, is 1v1ichelson believes it is Louis and more recently, impressed with the organic important for other stu­ to cities across the globe. eruption thatrs letting dents at UMSL to join the It is inspired by the Arab people know that they're Occupy Sf. Louis move­ Spring movement and the upset and not okay \vith ment. revolution in Egypt, whose the status quo, but thinks "1 would urge everyone citizens refused to leave the mov-cment should to become members of the their tents in Tahrir Square ultimately demand real occupation be ause \ve are as they demanded change changes. all being an ((ed b:T the in their government. "Personal!:. I would few [in po" er. ] If people They call themseh~5 the like to see some concrete self-educate and begin to Protesters at Kiener Pla'"l.a JARRED GASTRE ICH {THE CURRErtT 99 percent, highlighting changes come out of this. create structures and orga­ the uneven istribution 1 would like to s thi nizations w ithin their own of wealc h a one per nt en [gy, [in th long-t rID , spaces, \ e can begin to of Americans control 4 0 be able to be channeled make our ow n communi­ percent of [h nation's into day-to-day work, to ties and v o rk o ur w y into wealth. Frustrated with the actually shift the balance a revoluti nary world," government bailout of big of p ower in this country so fichelson said . money banks and the fall that people '\ h o are strug­ lvfeanwhile, Stein, no out of the global financial gling have more power stranger to activism before crisis of 2008, University and more control over-the Occupy St. Louis, sees this of Iv1issouri-St. Louis stu­ decisions and institutions movement as being driven dents are among the activ­ sort of intimately affecting by young people and also ists who are demonstrating their lives," Stein said. believes this is an opportu­ with Occupy St. Louis at Other student activ­ nity to increase student ac­ Keiner Plaza in downtown ists participating with the tivism on UMSL's campus. St. Louis. movement are impressed "1 work for an organiza­ "It is a movement to with the movement's ap­ (ion called Young Activists draw attention to the peal to all, regardless of United St. Louis, which overwhelming power that political ideology. is all about working with corporations have over our "I have been occupy­ college students and young country and the negative ing Kiener Plaza on and people to do concrete affect that power is having off since it began," Sarah social justice work in on everyday people," Justin Michelson, senior, inter­ the city. We're starting a Stein, senior, history, said. disciplinary studies said. "1 [Young Activist's United] "You have all these people have been at Occupy STL chapter on UMSL's cam­ walking away with millions to show my solidarity for pus," Stein said. "This is and millions of dollars, those around me. This is a really exciting moment St.Louis ;w while more people are such a motivating experi­ because 1 think really a being foreclosed upon and ence because people from lot of young people have kicked out of their homes, all political ideologies, been the impetus for this. PublicRadlo while people are [still] from tea party members I hope a lot more young earning less money, while to socialists, anarchists to people and college students 90 ~ - KWMU unemployment remains liberals, everyday repub­ through this process come at an incredibly high rate, licans-you name it- are in to consider themselves and so I really think it's a full support of each other. activists as well." A Service of The University of Missouri-Sl Louis Lauren Materson-Rodriguez, graduate, master: NIKKI VAHLE I THE CURRENT News at Noon, returns, debates indiv·dual a date and healthcare

MATTHEW B. POPOSKY Editor-in-Chief News at Noon is a monthly becoming too socialise. system's current state of professor of nursing, said. deductible, I had to pay at on me radio about this plan series that occurs every However, it has also garnered existence was also a heavy In addition, me current least mat much. I couldn't mat kids can get on to help semester at the University of a good deal of support from topic of debate. The healmcare system is one in which afford that healmcare, and had pay for treatment, but she l-.1issouri - Se. Louis and is a mose who believe healthcare system, as it currently insurance companies are to leave wi m a partially cu t wasn't aware of mis originally," collaborative act between The to be a right, ramer man a works, is one which does more interested in meir own off finger. Luckily, me human Jessica Dean, senior, pre- not rruly work towards the profits than in the care their resources office called me the Current, UMSrs Center for privilege. veterinary, said. Jessica's story Teaching and Learning and There are still mose, improvement ofhealm, but plans provide to policy- next day to tell me since I got is one which is echoed across me New York Times. The hO\vever, who believe mat ramer, works to heal illnesses. holders. Beyond that, many hurt at work, I had to go to a the nation, as healmcare fust News at Noon session it ought to be a choice to "\XJhat we currently have in policies have very saict rules specific doctor and they would debts continue to grow at a of me Fall 2011 semester purchase healmcare, and America mough, is a sick concerning what mey can or pay for it. But even having monstrous rate. occurred last Wednesday, mat is what this session dealt system, not a health system. I cannOt be used for. 1his is talked to me department, The debate eventually October 19, at 12:15 p.m. in \vim. Should the American mean that we only rake care a point which was strongly I didn't know about this became more about how me SGA Chambers, and those government be able to of individuals once mey have expressed by me story of option," lvfatthew Lenze, successful the American in arrendance discussed the essentially force citizens into already gorren sick. \YJe don't one of the arrendees last graduate, chemisrry, said. healmcare system currently individual mandate presented purchasing a healmcare plan? really do anything preventative Wednesday: "I Cut parr of my "1\/1y sister has Type 1 is, ramer mari whemer right now. This new plan may thumb off while working, and diabetes. IvIy mom was it is necessary to require in Obama's healthcare plan. Those who choose not to actually help improve me was referred to me Urgent working for a small business citizens to purchase a plan 1his topic has been heated may be slammed wim an system and move us towards Care. I got there, and mey mrough which she was under Obarna's healmcare since its introduction, extra tax, making it required a preventative system, a real said it would be a minimum insured. It got to the point suggestions. The system upsets bringing public outcry mat Americans purchase healmcare system," Margaret of $250 without insurance, where me premiums were citizens, and needs to change from Republicans across me healmcare. Barron-Burke, Mary Ann Lee and since I have a very high over $600 a monm. She heard in some way or anomer. nation about me Democrats The American healmcare 6 I ~hE [:UITrnt I OCTOBER 24, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I WHAT'S CURRENT Your weekly calendar of campus events. IIWhat's Current" is a free service for student organizations. Submissions must be turned in by 5 p.m. the thursday before publication; first-come, first-served. Listings may be edited for length and style. E-mail event listings to [email protected], with 'the subject "What's Current./I No hone or written submissions.

Peter Hyde, junior, finance, takes a shot Sunday, October 16 vs. Southern Indiana. ERICA THOMPSON JTHE CURR E ~T

Piano master class recital with Natalya Antonova From 12:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. Located in Lee Theater at the Touhill and open to all. What is a city? Conference Pianist Natalya Antonova is welcomed by Alia Voskoboyn ikova, Coordinator of Piano Studies, t'o From 8:45 a.m. to 5:00 p.m . Located in the J.e. Pennney Conference Center and open to all. present a recital and master class instruction. This year's theme is "Science in the City." This conference will focus on the interaction of natural For more information, call Touhill Ticket Office at 314-516-4949. environments and urban societies as "regions of innovation" where science is prospering. For more information, call Raina Traore -Gress at 314-516-5974.

Midsemester stress break Greek Scream: screening of Scream 4 From 11 :00 a.m. to 2:00 p.m. Located at MSC Century Room B and open to students. From 6:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. Located in the SGA Chambers at the MSC and open to all. Do you need a boost to get to the end of the semester? If so, come to the Office of Muiticuitura'i "What's your favorite scary movie?" Join UMSL Greek Life for a special screening of Scream 4. Relation's Midsemester Stress Break for de-stressing activities and light refreshments. Popcorn, candy, and soda are included for free. For more information, call Office of Multiculttural Relations at 314-516-6807. For mor€ information, call Kelly Forsythe at 314-516-5192.

legal aspects of planning zone From 6:00 p-.m. to 9:00 p,m. Located at 'J.e. Penney Conference Center and open to all. Learn about legal aspects of planning and zoning. Gain insight on adoption and use of planning and zoning tools, the scope of and limitations on regulatory authority, and the procedures Trick or treat in the MSC involved in zoning reviews, appeals and public hearings. Cost: $70 All day. Located in the MSC Bookstore and other offfices and open to students. For more information, call Stephen Smith at 314-516-5948. The students will start off in the Bookstore. We will provide them with goodie bags and a treat or two. They will then be instructed to visit each office that proudly displays a "Trick or Treat in the MSC" sign. For more information, call Stephanie .Eaton at 314-516-5765. OCTOBER 24, 2011 'm:hc ([urrrnt 7 Five inger eath Punch's " merl-• can Capita ist" hits metal har ANGIE O'DELL Staff V'Jriter

Five Finger Death popular back in the early Punch's newest EP, 2000s. They revive that "American Capitalist," genre "'''ith a new album, which came Out October and pull from their own 11, follows the band's success as ,veil. successful albums "The Way The songs that have of [he Fist" and "War is the the best lyrics and sound Answer." Following in those ar 'Am rican Capitalist," footsteps, the metal they are "Un er and Over It" and known for is back. "The Pride." It stands to The band is SEt to appear reason these songs come in concert at the St. Charles first n the album. These Family .'\rena on October songs would definitely be 31. good to get out aggression Dark Souls warns gamers: Pre are to die Fans of metal should be on a bad day. In fact, if pleased with what they hear one wants to do that, they should just listen to the MATTHEW B. POPOSKY VlDEO GAMES right off the bat. Starring Editor-in-Chief \\ ith their tide track, entire album. for players with enough every challenge. The musical score, while "American Capitalist" is a This album might also "Prepare to die!" This is a interest to discover as they "Dark Souls" stares directly sparse ,vith the exception good song for those that like work for some listeners wonderfully inviting slogan advance through the vast in the face of these new of boss barrles, is dramatic metal. Since the replacement who are not entirely fans for a video game to sport world of "Dark Souls." age games, laughs then and fining. It helps to add of their guitarist Darrell of metal but have dabbled directly on the back of the Players are allowed to stabs them through the that final glaze of moodiness Roberts with Jason Hook, in it. If one likes Korn, box. "Dark Souls" producers choose every aspect of their heart while continuing its which every video game the music has improved Stone Sour, or Hinder, one apparently decided a characters' development. diabolical cackling. There needs to be truly successful, a bit but that comes with may grow to appreciate warning was necessary for From the armor the are some simple rules players and when the music finally time for bands. This is their the messages and sound potential players of this character wears, to the need to remember, but each begins to swell as a massive first album with bassist Kris Five Finger Death Punch is game, and the slogan does combat style chosen, all challenge the player faces minotaur comes barreling Kael. trying to get across. not lie. the way down to the will feel different than those dmvn the battlements of This fully metal album is A good amount of This game is not for the individual advancement of faced before. \Xlhile players an ancient fortress, gamers for purely hard-core metal screaming is present in the average gamer. It sportS each statistic point towards may choose to revisi t an area ,,,rill understand just what fans. It is good music to songs and sometimes makes a difficulty level which the characters' physical for experience or to seek it is to fear their opponent get OUt one's aggression, it hard to appreciate the surpasses that of even developments, the player has secrets, each new area met from not only the image perhaps, although fans of lyrics. If fans are willing irs spiritual predecessor, total control. A player who will challenge the character on screen, but the aural lighter types of music may to understand the song's Demon's Souls, which was wishes to barrage enemies in a nevv' way. experience of the music, as not get the point the album messages and appreciate released in 2009. Much with spells can do just that, "Dark Souls'" world well. is making. Perhaps lovers of the music, they can enjoy like irs predecessor, "Dark and one who prefers rushing is massive, and puts that "Dark Souls" receives a . all types of music should try most songs in the albwn. Souls" delivers a punishing, in with a blade in hand will found in its predecessor solid A- from this re\'.iewer. it and see what the band is The album is indeed hard learning-based game play have no trouble building to shame. In addition to While the, garne is truly saying. Messages run deep metal. Some songs have a style which is unrivaled by a character to reflect this. this, the game is not linear. incredible, gorgeous, and in these songs, such as how good deal of profanity and nearly any other game on Players can choose to play Players may choose where engaging, it still loses points "The Pride" speaks about the "100 Ways to Hate" speaks the market today. how they wish. It is the they will start their journeys for that very same difficulty American dream, and not of hating a person. If fans Players of "Dark Souls" game's near-human intellect (after the prologue), and which is so praised herein. being afraid ofliving it. can get past the racy lyrics take control of a character (note: near) which will may complete areas in any After all, that does cut many

works from her early years defiantly by l"v1ariya three short works by CATE MARQUIS Boyz II Men "Twenty'· A&E Ed itor with the Denishawn dance Dashkina Maddux. other choreographers The most successful R&B group of all time is back with troupe, an era of elaborate The next piece was her commissioned in Dancer! choreographer their 20th anniversary album uTwenty. II The album will costumes and a fascination iconic work "Lamentation." remembrance of 9!11 closed Martha Graham feature a double CO, 13 new material songs and 8 re- with the exotic, faux Middle Graham essentially invented out the first half. revolutionized dance in ecorded Boyz /I Men classics. Eastern "Oriental" style. modern dance with this The second half of the the early 20th century. The A triptych of dance solos, still-astonishing solo, danced program was devoted Martha Graham Dance Diana Ross and the Supremes 1150th Anniversary: performed simultaneously, movingly by Carrie Ellmore- to "Appalachian Spring." Company brought her Singles Collection 1961-1969" used excerpts from three - Tallitsch. The dancer Graham's ballet is set revolutionary work to life, in The girlgroup signed with Motown in January 1961, pieces, "The Incense" (1906), performs seated, clothed in to music composed by a retrospective performance, aking this year the 50th anniversary. This package is Gnossienne (A Priest of a long tube of fabric, with Aaron Copland for her. presented by Dance St. Louis 3-CO set. ·It includes every Diana-Led Suptemes Single Knossos) (1917) and Tanagra which she struggles against "Appalachian Spring," a at the Touhill Performing that was made. _. (1926). The dances were throughout the dance. quintessentially American Arts Center on October 14- set to Erik Sari's haunting Next were two energetic, classic, was beautifully 15. ct. 25: Gnossienne No.1 and were modern ensemble works, danced, with Miki Orihara A narrator, Janet Eiber, om Waits IIBad As Me" danced by Carrie Ellmore- "Steps in the Street" and is the role of the Bride gave the audience a brief Tom Waits first studio album ofall new mu~ic in seven · Tallitsch, Ben Schultz and "Prelude To Action," which and Tadej Brdnik as the overview of the legend's ears titled "Bad as me" finds .him lnpossil;;fy the finest Xiaochuan Xie, respectively, Graham choreographed in Husbandman. All the career and introduced the voice of his career and at the helgnt'bf his songwtiting on Saturday night, October 1936 partially in response dancers were excellent, with sampling of her work from owers. .. - 15. to the rise of fascism. Maurizio especially good various periods. The next piece, "Serenata The female body is an in the energetic role of the The program began Coldplay '·Mylo Xylotoll Morisca" (1 916), was a instrument of protest and Preacher. with a suite of dances Coldplay's fifth studio album, produced by Markus fiery, piece of choreography resistance, with stomping Overall, it was a lovely titled "Prelude and Revolt: Dravs is the band's first release since 2008'S "Viva La Graham created in the feet and up-stretched arms. tour through the work of the l Denishawn to Graham" Vida or Death and All His Friends. ,; Denishawn sryle, danced "Lamentation Variations," legendary Martha Graham. (1906-1936). It included A&E '4 Direction 4 Printmak- ers' points t e way at A "ANGIE O'DELL megaliths and monoliths University in Johnson City, Staff \Nriter while there. He professes Tenn. to. be especially influenced "Big Burn" by anist "4 Directions, 4 by Stonehenge and other Catherine Chauvin, who Printmakers" is an exhibit prehistoric Neolithic works. is assistant professor of an all about prinrmaking Using metallic colors and at Denver U niversity and cunentl:' on display at priming two separate received her Master's of Gallery FAB in the Fine images on top of each Fine Ans in printmaking at " Ans Building on University other ptoduces a metallic Syracuse University, explores of lYfissouri - Sr. Louis' monolith over a transparem battles such as those that Nor"th Campus. The exhibit atmosphere, according to nature fights according to opened October 6 with a Robert Kennon. He is also her biography. Influenced by reception and speech b) one influenced by the Romantic barrles such as Gettysburg; of the four featured artists writers of the 18th and 19th she uses small black points Robert Kennon. The free centuries and the British in her v,ork Big Burn" exhibit ran thwugh October poet \Villiarl,1 Blake. v"hich look like trees. This 20. "Glacial Sacred features a background of red The primary focus of Passage\vay," part of and green which has small this exhibit was an array Kennon's collection, which trees and people on it. This of ditferenr directions one he began producing over piece is ver~r colorful and can take with printmaking. fi ve years ago, uses metallic features many fall colors. Printmaking was featured colors and the ebb and Bow Kent Kapplinger, who is in a variety of forms. Each of the glacier along with director of the Printmaking artist's approach was varied whites and blues with blacks Education and Research from the others and each on top representing rocks to Studio at North Dakota style was unique, but still produce the effects of this State University in Fargo, incorporated the styles 'Incentive' by Kent Kappinger, part of e hibit '4 Directions 4 Pri ntmak~ rs : O' lery F.-\B piece. N.D., is influenced by of printmaking and used " COURTESY OF JACK OSB't Another of the featured environmental issues, as them to make four different anists, Ralph Slarron, was well as a mixture of various artistic collections. A variety irlRuenced by the likes of visual elements, such YOU AND A GUEST of techniques were used to British writers including as balance and texture, p~esent the various moods, Lewis Carol and enjoys according to his artist's ARE"INVI TED TO A experiences and outlooks representing animals with statement. Printmaking of the featured artists. The different emotions that allo\>;'s Kapplinger to SPECIAL ADVANCE four printmakers featured can be either negative or combine and explore all were Roben Kennon, Kent positive, depending on the of this: In his work "From SCREENING OF Kappinger, Catherine way the viewer sees them. the same Mold II," from Chauvin and Ralph Slatton. Slatton incorporates humor 2002, Kapplinger combines These artists all teach at and amusingly playful text and diagrams, which ANONYMOUS major universities in the moods into his pieces. In are cloned and repetitive, U.S. and have had much his piece enti rled "Friends," in order to produce a work training in the way of art Slarron features rwo dogs, that seems to say something and primmaking. Robert one white and one black, about society and the For your chance to Kennon was the featured mingling in a caged sphere, consumer, in that many speaker and exhibit curator. \"hich is made by the things are mass produced. receive passes*, Kennon said he was happy tying together of twigs and Iv1achinery is featured to be touring \vith the log onto ropes. The two dogs seem here, as well as the words exhibit as it travels through to be playing and trying to "Associated Press," calling the Jvfidwest, including Gofobo.comlRSVP become friends. Here, the newspapers imo the minds lvlissouri, Illinois and Iowa black and white shading is of "iewers. and that the other featured and enter code: very well used. In "KenneL" Jeffrey Sippel, studio artists tour with the exhibit Slarron produces llan1as coordinator of an and an through their respective UMSLV72Y hanging down, houses, history, sajd he was excited areas of the country. dogsho"wling and rats on a because [his exhibir shows A native of Sainr backdrop of a cobbled street the possibilities presented Louis, currently residing COLUMBI A ~l 'ilr'hc[ urrrnt are also featured. Slatton's for printmaking and PICTURES W \,!;., in Canton, 1\{o., and work produces fantasy anists and for the va ious ~eaching a[ Culver Stockton and playfulness and seems directions of expression, and ·While \upplic~ hst. Passes are availahle on a College, Kennofls work firs -cowe, firsr-sLrved ba i . No purch;J,st to be influenced by fairy thar rhe exhibit showed a is influenced b his many nertlsary. T~YO . dmh-on l' pili ~ p"r person. tales. Ralph Slatton teaches high level of experience and trips to England and the 1l1i!t film has hero .ated PG.13 by th ~1P. A at East Tennessee State accomplishment. sketches he made of the for ~omc violence and sc" un! mDtem. An over all I )k at everytb 'ng going on at the TASK Pmty on Friday evening in G Her} 210, TASK j. a "elf-generating impro ~ ational art-making event devwQpe-.

ASHLEY ATKINS Features Editor

The Variety Children's together; the costumes, the From the start of the ro be a song that has not and the Munchkins and and melancholy songs. Theatre of St. Louis acting, everything", Rose show, children were on the been forgotten over the their interpretation of The Wizard had tOld the brought the classic and Fischer, audience mem- edge of their seat from the ages. Kaylee Williams, 8th "Ding Dong the Witch Tin Man that "the heart colorful production of ber, said. "This is my first sudden strike of the full grader at Nonh Kirkwood is Dead' and "Lolly Pop is judged not by how the "Wizard of Oz" to the Variety show production orchestra to the introduc- 1vliddle School, said that Gang". Children flinched much one loves, but by Touhill Performing Arts and I think that it was just rion of a real life Toto, the performance had a t the sigh t of the fl y- how much one is loved". Center at the University awesome. I hope that I can played by the energetic brought back some fine ing monkeys. They were Everybody on stage must of Missouri- St. Louis. come to another one." pet actor, Snickers. The childhood memories. amused by the perfor- have had a huge hean to A three day event, the To contribute to the tlny Dorothy and Cab- Beth Henkel, audience mance of the ne,,-er-ending share such a performance production showcased success of such a memo- bage Patch imposters in member, liked the fact that jitterbug which showcased because they were greatly the talents of 17 variety rable production, the the crowd wanted to take she was able to offer her a little professional tap. loved which was displayed children who worked as Variety Children's the- him home, while adults lit children something more And the audience cheered in a standing ovation. onstage actors, as well as, 7 atre of St. Louis had also up at the first cackle of the than video games and as the evil witch was di- All of the participan tS in additional variety children, sought out the assistance wicked wi tch. movies. "It is a different minished by a simple pail Variety's Children Theatre shadowing behind stage as of some of the ci ties most Together, the crowd kind of experience. You get of water. showed their audience the technical crew. Suffer- distinguished profession- went silent as the most an- to see live performance. But, it was not until the what one can do with a ing from a wide range of als, such as , eight equity ticipated pan of the show You get to see people put- characters had met up with little hard work and ac- disability, they did not let actorS to play the parts of had arrived. ting an effort into enter- the '.vizard of Oz that the ceptance. diversity keep them from Dorothy, Scarecrow, and \'Vhen Dorothy, played taining and it is sort of true ~eart of the play was "These kids can do any- putting together a show the Cowardly Lion, Muny by Alexis Kinney, let out like an old school way of exposed. Each character thing. You just have to give that appealed to not only Costume Coordinator the first notes of "Over the being entertained that kids was brought to Oz based them that chance", Laura the child, but the adult. Pete Messineo, Webster Rainbow", grown women do not necessarily see a lot on some internal dilemma. Boyle, Creative Producer "I would not have ever Unjversity's Dunsi Dai of wept in silence, while their of nowadays", Henkel said. The honest declaration of of Variety the Children's known that there were managing scenic design, patient husbands sat beside As the stOry changed its the Wizard was what left Charity of St. Louis, said. kids with disabilities up on with direction by Tony them most likely contem- location to fvfunchkinland, a lasting impression on Those with the opporruni- (he stage because every- Award- nominated Lara plating the outcome of the the crowd \vas bombarde.d the audience, beyond the ty to should catch the next. thing just blended so well Teeter. cardinals came. It appeared by the wit of the Glinda glitter, dancing jitterbugs, Variety show in town. FEATURES I I WWW.THECURRENT-ONlINE.COMIOCTOBER 24, 2011 I 'aChe [brrc:nt I 13 Amnesty nternational reform t the hands of freshma

HALl FLINTROP St aff Writ er

In today's world of unrest, ers, activists, and members organizations to bring back peaceably like pigs wal- group had died out before I Although the previous protests and human rights in over 150 territories and in speakers and hold the lowing in me mud while our was given such an opportu- formation of Al UMSL was violations from east to west, countries, their mission is popular "Reggae for Darfur" bremren suffer. We must act " nity," Simmonds said. "So, successful, the graduation it can be difficult to know to fight against the abuse of event," Gerda Ray graduate, Brent Simmonds, freshman, when it came down to me of its former leadership had where to cum. Luckily, human rights. "Our vision history, AI Ur..1SL advi- international relations, said. eimer letting the group stay brought it to a screeching Amnesty International is is for every person to enjoy sor, said. The reformed AI Simmonds believes mat me de-dd or picking it back up ... halt. Simmonds biggest fear reforming at University of all the rights enshrined in UlvfSL hopes to perform me UMSL student should join I had to take up me leader- is that me campus will not Missouri - St. Louis. Along the Universal Declaration same function, raising aware- me group because of the ship role." embrace tIle efforts made by with serving those in need of Human Rights and orner ness among UMSL students difference mat mey will be Amnesty International has him and Amnesty Inter- by advocating for human international human rights while entertaining them make in another's life. championed such causes as national before it dies oUt rights, Amnesty Interna­ standards." mrough campus events. «I decided to restart AI gay rights, me Campaign to again, but despite the odds tional UMSL will give "In the past the orga- Ul'vfSL needs Amnesty on campus because it needed Save Darfur andStamp out set against him, he still plans UMSL students who wish to nization has played an for the same reason that the to be done. Amnesty is toO TortUre. Thus, its focuses on seeing the idea of the charitably donate time to the important role in bringing whole world does, "because great of a group to be left to are not upon a singular goal. group out until me end. He preservation of human rights human rights issues to the someone has to be mere to me wayside. Sure, I was orig- The group is currently hopes the rest of me UMSL a means to do so. UMSL campus. A.!. has say 'no' to the abuse of hu- ina.!ly ...vanting, and expected, focused on abolishing the community will share in his On the Amnesty Interna­ worked with peace groups, manity. Just because things to just be the young-whip- death penalty and eliminat- enthusiasm for human rights tional website, AI described the GLBT [Gay, Lesbian, may be good for us does not per-snapper freshman who ing tyranny in leadership and come together to sup- itself as a global movement. Bisexual, Transgender] com- mean they are that way for came to help out, but that in the Middle East and port Amnesty International With over 3 million support- munity, and other campus others, and we can not sit wasn't an option because the throughout the world. on campus once again. ducation in America is evaluated by TL rofessionals JOESEPH GRATE Staff V'/riter

W hile all of St. Louis mala Rogers, a well-known The subject of th 0 ting fired. Dowden-White The status of men and cussion with the importance gathered around their COz} activist in St. Louis who Child Left Behind policy argued that it was a problem women of color and their of this generation focusing Bat screens last Wednesday writes weekly for the St. had struck a ner\' with of society. She said that soci- affect on the educational on bettering themselves. to watch the Cardinals Louis American. She herself Rogers, who stated that the ery glorified the entertainer system, as well as their own "You do not have to go oc- throw down at the \Vo rld was a teacher and a found­ school system had many over the educator, which community, was questioned. cupy Wall Street, you need Series, the Black Leader­ ing member of the Organi­ flaws before the policy, but can cause disrespect for the Stalling brought up the fact to occupy your classrooms, " ship Organizing Council zation D r Black Suuggle. now there are serious isslles educator. "You [teachers] that there is a real issue here Stalling said. (BLOC) at the University of The evening took off such as teachers cheating to have to believe kids can among colleges. "Looking The meeting ended with Missouri - St. Louis tackled with a question about make test scores. learn," Rogers said. Other- at an education system that a few questions from the matters of a more seri- government having a role in "Every child in America wise teachers will not teach leaves students in debt with- audience. Then the panel ous nature in the Student the school community. "I [is] guaranteed a prison cell, them. out a degree," Stalling said, members were awarded a Government Association believe it really starts with but not a quality educa- The questions that is an important task. Black certificate from the BLOC. Chambers of the Millen­ the community holding tion," \XTilson said. Stalling followed concerned the men and women are usually It was an informative meet- nium Student Center. The elected officials accoun t­ and Dowden-"'X'hite sup- abandonment of traditional not prepared to succeed ing for many students. " I four-person panel, made up able. A strong communiry," ported Wilson's statement schools for Charter schools: when they have arri¥ed, really was informed because of well-respected individu­ Wilson said. Stalling stated mentioning how the policy is this good or bad? It was and one reason is lack of they hit home about the als from the St. Louis area, that the government was is making low-income area mutually agreed among the involvement from the com- community and different discussed the inequality too vague in their goals and schools to only dig a deeper panel that there is no fault munity in collegiate levels. things," Tamisha Tillman, in America's educational that perfect opportunities hole. in a parent trying to get The speaker ended the senior, business manage- system. were being neglected in the The discussion moved on their child a better educa- discussion with a final ment, said. She had appreci- The panel members were classroom. to teachers and how they are tion. But the problem boils question. What can be done ated the variety of voices Terry Wilson, a director for Rogers stated that the teaching. Stalling brought down to the financial inabil- about it? Rogers announced that had contributed to all Jennings School District, government was for the up the issue that there are ity to stand by such a drastic that there needed to be areas of the discussion. MK Stalling, an UMSL people and by the people, teachers that do not chal- decision. Rogers believed, more awareness. Wilson and "I believe we had some alumnus with a master arguing that the St. Louis lenge the students, causing that the only advantage of Dowden-White had a volley very good questions. Every- in sociology, and Priscilla community, who continues them to fail in the future. the Charter school was its of ideas on how and why thing was very good and I Dowden-White, professor to fail their school system, Wilson noted that there are ability to force public insri- the black community needs believe in the topic," Andrea history, UMSL. The star needs to stop blaming the to many laws protecting tutions to look deeper into to be a tighter-knit commu- Adams, Vice President of ' I player on the panel was Ja- these teachers from get- their own system. nity. Stalling ended the dis- BLOC, said. . ~. 14 I ~hc [UITCrit I OCTOBER 24, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I SPORTS

Men's occer has strong finish in inalh meg me OWEN SHROYER middle of the field. Sabotic scored his first goal of the to be enough for the Tri­ like the Tritons were go­ Sports Edito( was able to get one more season. This gave SIU tons to \\'in the game. ing to even the score, but shot in for UMSL before some serious momentum, The dramatic win was O'Mara's shot hit the post. It \vas senior day at Don built up a guick COllnter the half, but it was high. and they were able to get the perfect starting note Down by a goal and wi th D allas field last Sunday, attack, moving the ball The second half had a freq uent possession in the heading il1[o a matchup time running out, the when the University of downfield where Almin very exciting start, with offensive zone minutes agai nst sixth ranked Tritons felt the heat and 1\1issouri -" Sc Louis Tri­ Sabotic, senior, commu­ the Trirons working the later, earning a corner ki ck nationally team and made three shots, twO of tons hosted Great Lakes nications, gOt the Triton's ball in the offensive zone and getting three shots, can £; rence leader orth which were on goal, in the Valley Conference rival first shot of the day, a~ld persistently. Johnny but the defense and Boruff Kentucky University. final tWO minutes, but the Southern Indiana Uni­ although it \vas saved, the O 'Mara, senior, marketing, were able to keep the sh tS T h Trit ns had already Trirons could not score, versity Screaming Eagles. Tritons maintained pos­ made strong shot on net from going in. d f ted a top ten nation­ and lost the game 1-0. The Screaming Eagles have session and Peter H yde, that wa blocked out of The gam e gOt inren ally ranked team earlie r in T hi was a crucial game struggled this year, and junior, finance, be,lt the bo unds, the first of three for the remainder, with rhe seaso n when they beat for the Trit ns, the loss of are in 13th place, behind goa.lie for his third goal in in a row. The second shOt both teams pressing or M i. souri &T , \-\· h were w hich put them two wins the Tritons. in GL C the last six games. D av id was crossed in by Schwer. po session and a t..l me­ L nked s venrh hen the b h ind the eighth and rankings. The Eagles have Schwer, senior, busines And £; r the third, H, de winning goal. Hyde sb t TritOn beat them -0. final s ed in the GLVC posted a three win, nine administration, crossed had another shot on goal, on goal earned tbe Tri­ Th if L versus NK tournament with only loss and one tie record. the ball into H yde for his bur his header hit off the tons a corner kick. Gino g me was on NKU home two games left. Both these The Tritons needed a fourth assist of the season. crossbar, an enemy for Valel1[i, junior, busines turf. The first half was all games are on the road, and victory here to keep them The Tritons got back on Hyde all season . On the administration, sent the KU outshooting the Tri­ will certainly be tOugh for alive for the post-season. the offensive quickly when third corner, O'Mara had corner kick in beautifully, tons 6- 1, and ourscoring the TritOns to win. Their It rook ten minutes for Mike .McCarthy, senior, another shot but missed and his cross found the them 1-0. The Tritolls did hope remain high and the game's first shot, but information systems, made high. head of Evan Scbumacher, not give up though, and they continue to watch the the Screaming Eagles could a shot on net that forced Southern Indiana built senior, business adminis­ came out firing in the sec­ standings for last mjnure not beat Tritons goalie Tim the keeper to work for a up an attack in the 57th tration, for Schumacher's ond half. The Tritons had upheavals in the final Boruff, senior, criminal save. The game was very minute when the Scream­ second goal of the season, fWO quick shots, bur could matchups. The Triton's justice, and he recorded possessive after these first ing Eagle's midfielder and Valenti's third assist. not find the back of the final two games are at his first of four saves dur­ shots, with much of the Miles Durham, sopho­ The last goal came in the net early in the game. In Bellarmine University and ing the game. The Tritons action taking place in the more, exercise science, 82nd minute, and proved the 70th minute, it looked Maryville University. Neutzling scores in OT to secure wi for women's soccer

ELI DAINS out-shot their opponents the first 90 minutes. ence. Friday, Oct. 21, the Tritons looks to finish out Staff Writer 7-3 in the half as well. The The Tri tons decided to team traveled to Highland the season strong \Vednes­ UMSL starters hustled and write their own destiny, Heights, Kentucky to play day, Oct. 26, back in St. The University of Mis­ team's strategy was to keep showed excellent stamina however, when Kaylee the Northern Kentucky Louis at Maryville Universi­ souri - Sr. Louis Tritons the ball on the Hounds side with no subs being called Neutzling, senior, crimi­ Norse who were on a ten ty. The Saints are currently were able to rally in over­ of the field and apply pres­ for the team until the 40th nology, put in the game game winning streak to ranked 13th in the GLVC, time to win their final home sure to take advantage of minute. winning goal JUSt over compliment a conference with a 4-11-1 record (4-9 game of the season Tuesday, the wet conditions, which In the second half, one minute into the first leading 13-1 record (11-1 in conference). "Our team October 18, and improve they were able to do. "If Indianapolis began to find overtime period. The goal in conference). Sadly, this is really motivated right their record to 8-6 (7-5 in mistakes were made due to their groove and managed was assisted by a beauti­ record is now boosted to now with our three games conference). Field condi­ the wet conditions we want­ to out-shoot the Tritons ful pass from Jesa Jenkins, 14-1 after a loss by the winning streak, so we will tions were far from optimal ed them to happen to Indy 6-3. UMSL g~alie Kaiclyn senior, phsical education, Tritons.The Tritons then keep on pushing ourselves that day, it had rained all and not us, and in their half Smugala, sophomore, sec­ that sailed over the defense continued the Ky. roadtrip towards our goal of mak­ morning and definitely and not ours," said Bobby ondary education, was able and set up Neutzling for a in Louisville on Sunday, ing the conference tour­ felt like fall in terms of " Lessentine, head coach, to step up to the challenge, shot from the left wing of Oct. 23, when they played nament," said Neutzling temperature, the Tritons UMSL women's soccer. however, recording three the box. the Bellarmine University after the Triton's victory outlasted the University of The first half saw the Tri­ key saves in the half to keep Looking ahead, the Tri­ Knights. After a victory over the Greyhounds. The Indianapolis Greyhounds tons drawing seven corner her clean sheet intact. Both tons have three road games against our Tritons, the Tritons are currently in the to seal the victory 1:01 into kicks as a result of their at­ teams were playing hard at to round out their season, Knights are ranked second GLVC Tournament picture. the first overtime period. tack of the goal, but timely the close of regulation, and including a tough week­ in the GLVC, with a record Check Out next weeks issue The final score of the game defense from the Hounds the game appeared destined end against the number of 12-2-1 (I 1-2 in confer­ of The Current for in depth was 1-0. prevented any scoring from for a double-overtime draw one and two teams in the ence). coverage of the final games Going into the game the taking place. The Tritons with a score of 0-0 through Great Lakes Valley Confer- Despite recent losses, the of the exciting 2011 season. SPORTS I I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I OCTOBER 24, 2011 I ~h( Q:urrrnt I 15 Women's vol eybal cores anotller win over rival Missouri S&T GREG LAINE Staff Writer court as well as selling shirts. he wanted to see. Young The night was successful all .....vas looking to see the girls Tritons women's volleyball 1his was one vicrory that around. come more together as a dominated on the court on me Trirons will not forger. Zeta Tau lllpha will be team which will be crucial (he evening of Friday, Ocro­ "Our biggest rival this year hosting more events in the for upcoming games against ber 21, when they conquered would be Missouri S&T. coming week for Think Pink teams like Maryville, Rock­ their biggest rival, Missouri They beat us at their place Week. Including the annual hurst and \Villiam Jewel. As Science and Technology. The and they are currently receiv­ Stand Up and Cheer Classics for Friday's game, Young and S&T Miners were beaten in ing votes for the rop 25,n said cheerleading competition and me audience saw exactly the me fifth set wim a final score Ryan Young, head coach, me annual Car Bash. improvements Young was of 3-2. This game ended in UMSL women's volleyball. On me court, Coach Ryan looking for during me game. vi((ory for the University Vengeance was on me minds and the girls still battled The girls congratulated and Missouri - Sr. Louis. of the girls and vengeance was fiercely with bom tearns consoled each other and kept At 7:00 p.m. the girls lined sen·ed. scraping out: two matches themselves going strong. up on either side of the net ro The season is going well each. "Om conference has Wim spirits high, the girls begin the first match. Wim but nOt: as ell as Coach been very competitive and ev­ went into Saturday's gaD1e players at the ready, the first Young and the girls have ery night seems ro be a rough against Drury wim confi­ serve was played. Back and hoped. wim a record before match," Young said. And dence. UMSL once again forth me game waged be­ Friday's game of 13-8 and 7-4 a rough match it was v;rith came out victorious over tween twO teams who craved in the GLVC. both teams battling back and Drury, raising their current vicrory. \Xi'hile all of the action was forth. With stern guidance record to 15-8 and 9- in me "We knew it would occurring inside on the comt, from Coach Young, the night conference. "It feels good to be a rough game, but we Zeta Tall Alpha was busy sup­ ended in high spirits after an come out victorious," Erin practiced hard all ek and portinO" br ast cancer aware­ UMSL victory. Higgins, senior, early child­ practice paid off,' aid Shelby ness wi m the help of the After m game, Young hood education, and \'ifeslie Cr..l\v{ord, senior, biology, tean1. The an1e dubbed Dig commented on the improve­ Gafl~ senior, accounting, said after the game. The team had tor the Cure \: as spon ored mems h saw wim the team. after Friday s game. been preparing for this game by the Zetas to raise mone) "They picked each other With more games to come as well as many others in the for breas t cancer awarene . up and rayed positive but in the season, the tean1 could lie Gaff and Cbel ea Burkle jump for a block in the Great Lakes all y onfer- ith donors taking pledg agressi e, Young said, which be looking at a highly success­ eame ' ain t Dmry, 0 tober 22. ence. for digs or passes on dle v as one of the improv ments fUl season. ERICA THOMPSON I THE CURRENT Monday ight Footbal and Halloween: a tradition of spirit

LEON OEVANCE Staff Writer

Traditionally, Octo- in "Nightmare on Elm \'Var and rides to the scene Green Bay Packers and the soundtrack had a ghoulish represented by a gang ber 31 is thought to be Street," slashing teenagers of the battle in a nightly Monsters of the Midway, theme and the images of of people dressed as the reserved for children in to death. quest for his head. the Chicago Bears, two the announcers, legends Monday Night Football the latest costumes yelling Literature has "The Perhaps the most scary bitter rivals from the old Al Michaels, Dan Dierdof announcers for the Hal- trick-or-treat in search Legend of Sleepy Hollow," image of October 31, is National Football Confer- and Frank Grifford, were loween race. The main of candy from neighbors, a story about a secluded the famous radio broadcast ence Central Division, carved into a candle-lit components of the race bobbing for apples at a Dutch settlement of Tarry in 1938 of Orson ,,"'VeIls' nicknamed "the Black pumpkin. featured huge replicas of party, or watching Charlie Town, in 1790. Ichabad "War of the Worlds." and Blue Division." The In 1998, h10nday Night each of the Monday Night Brown and Linus in the Crane, the stern school \Vells broadcasted the hoax Monday Night Football Football continued to push Football commentators, pumpkin patch waiting teacher completed with convinced that people introduction featured Joe the envelope as Indianapo- big floppy feet and a dash and watching for the Great "Brom Bones" Van Brunt knew better but when the Namath, YA Tittle and the lis staged a Masquerade across the football field Pumpkin to appear. for the hand of Katrina country believed the Mar- feared "search and destroy" Ball for Halloween. The of Halloween derby while Others believe that Van Tessel. Brom Bones tians had invaded earth for middle linebacker Ray Denver Broncos and India- cheerleaders shook their ghouls and goblins will won Katrina's hand when real. The broadcast had Nitschke. Then Namath napolis Colts played before pom-poms. roam the night. And how he assumed the identity to be stopped because of passed the introduction 60,000 people who all put This year, the action is can we blame them with of the Headless Horseman complaints. to Demon Knight, an on masks that spoofed the not limited to the field. the cinema classic masked and chased Ichabad our of So does this have any- Elvira look-a-like, ghouls Monday Night Football Halloween night football killers on the loose like tOwn. The Headless Horse- thing to do with sports? and goblins in a graveyard announcers. ESPN had is returning as the Kansas Jason of "Friday the 13th" man was supposedly a Hes- Yes it does, because setting and former Green a Halloween Derby at City Chiefs host the San -'- fame, Michael Myers in sian trooper whose head Monday Night Football Bay defensive terror Reggie halftime where Mike Trico, Diego Chargers in a house "Halloween" and brunt was shot off by a stray has upped the ante on White who demolished Chris Berman, Joe Theis- of horrors for visitors at razor gloved killer Fred- cannonball during some Halloween traditions. quarterbacks and running man, Tony Kornheiser, the Arrowhead Stadium in die Krueger who invaded nameless battle of the Consider the October 31, backs. The Monday Night Michael Irvin, Steve Young a match up for west divi- sleeping teens dreams American Revolutionary 1994 game featuring the Football introduction and Tom Jackson were sion prominence. 16 I '([he ~orrcnt I OCTOBER 24, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONlINE.COM I I OPINIONS • • 01 /Counter 1

How would you respond to a zombie apocalypse?

tren in numbers best o se se in delayin hein way to survive against e evitable, survivors s o d onslaug t of the undead simply ccept their fate

A[ [his point it seems inevi­ erative one is wirnin a group, it 00 st 'ucmred of gr ups, So z-Day has finally arrived., ever again. Don't even dunk about 'Who vvuuld seriously wam to live table; the w mbie apocalypse hwnan namre t always look the so jal roles, whil perbaps has it? The end of the world as \N'e going ro the bathroom alone. in a world filled 'With animared will happen. Whether by lit for 'nwnero uno . Ironi­ not al ~ ys rigidly dined or know it is quickly coming and And kiss the ,\urd 'rela.xation' dead corpses? There is no way in outbreak of disease something cally, this is easier in a group, f 11 wed, lea no onfusion now is th rime ro decide: fight gcxxi bye. -Those lLL'illries don't hell that the world after Z-Day supernarural, or the results f or 'en mall post-ap calytic as to wh s best at ding whar the undead or give in and become exist anymore. would smell balf\vay decen t and some goverrunent experiment society where the 1 - fit people .job. Furthermore, it allm for oneo them? FIghting to live .in a wodd that is reason enough to exit d1e gone horribly wrong, the dead will serves as w mbie fodder. those less adept in one field. What is d1ere to fight fur? The d1ar is putting furth every effort world of the living dead. \-vill walk again. Everyone has If one se their chosen group perhaps hunting, to benefit entire human population (fur to see the demise of the fe.,.v that However, with this option it is their own'wmbie contingency "slimming down", its best to whil onu'ibuting in wa) the most part) is, or will soon be, remain just doesn't seem like it obvious that not just any type of plan'; some say they'll take to migrate to another, more bal­ closer ro their specific skill dead. Boyfriendslgirliiiends, par­ would be too fim. Sure, slaying 'removal' ·would do. The brain of the seas, creating a naturally in­ anced one, or organize some set. Going solo allows for zero ems, siblings, friends, ro-workers; a fe.,.v wmbies now might seem the Exiter (as we will call him/her) surmountable barrier between sort of mutually beneficial error; everything from food they are all gone, at least in the all peachy-keen but after a day must be deitroyed. Perhaps the themselves and the undead, merger, lest one end up one of preparation ro scouring to technical sense. or two it will begin to take its roll best option would be a bullet to while others will choose to bar­ the weak links on the chain. As shelter has to be done perfectly But thar's not even the waISt mentally and physically. the head? Bur if the wmbies ger ricade themselves, in the hopes ruthless as such a strategy may the firSt time, and . parr. The local baseball team is The best: bet fur anyone who of the gun, there goes that plan. that they're able to wait out seem, it truly is beneficial to all Finally, groups are necessary gone, .so no more sports. Every­ isn't a track star, a military genius, Also, me body 'Nuuld just become the pldnoue. One of the more members of the group, even for maintaining sanity. Man one at the local fuse: fOOd place or just plain out sick and twisted wmbie food even ifit was success­ pressing questions, however, those less apt to constantly be­ is a social animalj as much is pmbably "expired" too, .so no is to just give in. Forger trying' to fully pulled off. is the choice between leading ing preyed on, who get to live as we hare to admit it, we do more cheeseburgers. All the aaors be the unsung hero, it just isn't In this siruation, it would be a solitary existence, going it that much longer than they rely on one another. When and musicians are gone, .so furger going to happen. The few that best to have a grenade. Nor onlY alone and never needing or would have, had they been on sheer survival is the prevailing that movie .sequel or that hot new will survive will suffer more than would the Exiter be given meir wanting to trust or even come their own. focus of one's daily life, even album that was supposed to be any wmbie with a couple missing ideal ending, but.so would all of in contact ~th anyone else, Next up, and this is true in the most v~ouely positive mo­ coming out soon. limbs ever will me surrounding undead as well. or playing the role of "pack any survival scenario, wmbies ments benveen fellow human In a matter of days, the entire . Of course, turning into one It could be considered the perfect animal" and showing defer­ or otherwise, are professions beings keep one psychologi­ wodd will erupt in chaos; no of me walking dead doesn't seem end to an absolutely imperfect ence to a larger social order in and roles. Who'll take care cally grounded in reality, and more electricity; no more running like the best option either. Perhaps world. exchange for ease of survival. of the sick, lone ~olves? The believing in hope. warer. Come the winrer months, a blaze ofglory would make Of course, not everyone will The answer is obvious; in the constant barrage of brain­ Solo survival is too sloppy, it's going to be an absolute hell to me most sense. Fmd the most have me guts to leave me wmbie event of an undead takeover, hungry undead will be nothing too hazardous. While one live anywhere wimout a fireplace. wmbie-populated place and go in i.I1fust:ed world like our Exiter the best chance for survival if singlehandedly fighting off should always be looking Food will nm low tmless the neJ.[­ the guns a-blazin'. \'0J.en it seems would. It is ~derstandable of lies in the warm embrace of a the symptoms of a particu­ out primarily for their own est Wal-Man hasn't been looted like there are too many to fight ~urse. But after Z-Day; choices gtoUp. larly nasty viral infection. In well-being, particularly in this ten times already. off, create your own expiration will have to be made. Either sur­ First and foremost, a group the dead of zombie winter, hypothetical, new world cbar­ And don't forget the fact that· dare (hint, hint). vive in a hell of a world that will is ideal predominantly for one who'll forage and hum for acterized by loss and isolation, no matter what, wmbies will Don't think ofit as suicide, but be left, or move on to whatever reason and one reason alone: food when there's shelter to it is best to do so within the be lurking around every comer. rather removing oneself from an may be w-aiting on the omer side fodder. No matter how coop- be found? Even in the most confines of a group. Forger 200ut a good night's sleep . absolutely honible other option. ofthe afterlife. OPINIONS 1 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONUNE.COM I OCTOBER 24, 2011 1~hc ~rrcnt 117

OUR OPINION OUT OF LEFT FIELD What's in a costume? ot as Favored a oween frights much as some seem to think t far removed from reality

Over the years, Halloween something (or perhaps even is. (It's John Boehner, in case Horror movies are a definitive, genre-defining has been, for lack of a better an early thirty-something) anyone was wondering.) taple of Halloween en­ work of horror, from films word, domesticated. The has probably at least been For the most part, e rtainment. It's been that such as "Frankenstein" and holiday can trace its origins invited, if not attended, a though, the fact that our ay almost for as long as Bela Lugosi's "Dracula" to back to Samhain, an ancienc costume party for Hallow­ generation still enjoys get­ here have been movies; last-decade's widely popu­ Celtic celebration of the een. ting dressed up in ridiculous 1931 's "Dracula," starring lar "Saw" mega-franchise. harvest. In its original form, This is particularly appar­ costumes to have fun with ela Lugosi, pioneered So how, then, is horror the holiday was replete with ent on a college campus, or friends one day a year is no he genre in the days even able to reinvent itself for overtones of darkness and an}"vhere that is home to great commentary on the efore films could talk. each succes sive generatio n? death, as it also marked the a large number of younger "youth of roday," or anything he genre has continued There is no single, passage of the year from the adults. Not that college Stu­ like that. o endure for 8 an , d efinitive a nswer to this. "lighter" half to the "darker" dents need any extra excuse IL's not as though we're paw'ning everything from One could probably pose half. ro have a parrr , of course', talking abom heavy metal it classics to h rgettable t 1 e qu tion to five differ­ Jeremy Zschau Over time, though, it's but there's something abom or any of that other new­ -movie, as Americans ent psychologists and get turned inco something less Halloween thar seems ro fangled, unfamiliar sruff the ' e m n \ . [0 have tired of five d iffe ren t answers; a nd n er hav th uaht of. ominous and more com­ bring out a special brand of kids are dmvn with these 1aving the living daylights when a ked w h y he likes It also b ars m neio ning m ercialized. The atavistic enthusiasm in people. Ap­ days; costume parties aren't cared ur of th m . horror movies, the average that zombi , o ne of the rituals and pagan sacrifices parend)" it's a bit more fun c m pl tely foreign to thOSe man on th [feet might mainstays of rh mod rn ­ once associated ,"vith the to get drunk while dre sed of older generations, though orror genre [ha t l-eep' w II have a sixth. da. horro r gcn r , h y e holiday have been replaced as a pirate or a nurse than it might not be exactly the eop le inter t d nd co m ­ T here j one co ndu­ e\ olved them cl re vel' with carved jack-o-Ianterns, it. is to get drunk dressed as S3.me as the) remember. (For ·ng ba k for m re? The si o n t h t eems to be a the d ccad s. cartoon ghosts and children oneself. example, a cosrume par ry in drenaline rush on e gets Hk 'l answer, however. the une in costumes. Some are critical of what 1951 \vould probably have rom a good care certainly Horror movies have the somew hat s 11 ti nt h am­ Such has been the image they see as the shallow and a couple fewer slurty nurses lays a parr, and the ability ffe et on p eople that bling moun s of George of Halloween for years, even hedonistic ways of in attendance, bur that goes o get that rush in a safe th , do ~ecau se they play Rom ero's classic ' Livin especially the part abom the younger generation, without saying.) nvironmenr like a movie upon people's fears, and D ead" movies, replaced by costumes. Trick-or-treating and that's certainly to be So, costumed parry­ heater could explain parr as ' ciety progres ses and the fast-moving, mind- has historically been a staple expected. The generational goers, don't let anyone get f the appeal. t c hnolo g ~ - improves, there less undead beasts seen of the contemporary Hal­ gap isn't going ro go away you down. Sure, you might are ahva::s new things ro be in the '28 Days" movies. lo,"veen; nearly every person any time soon (and it's not look ridiculous going our at afraid of. Vampires have undergone has at least one or two fond as though the "sex)' costume" the end of Oerober in that For example, in the a similar metamorpho- memories of dressing up as a fad of modern times is doing skimpy little ourfit, but who einventing old concepts ] 9305, the concept of a sis, going from unnatu- favorite character or creature much to change their opin­ cares? You're having fun, and f beings or crearure who man-made genetically en­ ral looking creatures, as and parading around the ion, anyway) . that never hurt anyone. It's re evil, supernarural or gineered disease simply did featured in such films neighborhood in packs, go­ Should this opinion nor as though your parents oth. There's an element of not exist as anything more as "Nosferaru" and the ing from door to door with be taken (0 heart? Well, never wore anything embar­ amiliarity there, and if the than a fantastical, implau­ original " Dracula" to the friends in search of candy perhaps, to a certain extent. rassing out in public, after ood of franchise remakes sible idea. Yet, today, that suave, cosmopolitan sorts from the locals. It is, after all, rather sicken­ all. nd reboots spilling out of very same idea is the basis seen in "Underworld"and In fact, getting dressed up ing to read polls of rwenty­ Unsigned editorials reflect ollywood these days is of movies like "Quaran­ "True Blood." As our tastes in costumes has become such somethings wherein more of the m.ajorit), viewpoint ofIhe ny indication, familiarity tine," "1 Am Legend" change and as our world a favored Halloween pastime them can recite the names Current's Editorial Board: s a good thing for audi- and the "28 Days" fran­ changes, the things that for the current generation of the cast of "Jersey Shore" Matthew POpOJky, Minho chise. These films follow evoke our fears evolve right that, unlike their parents and than, say, the ten amend­ Jung, Ashley Atkins, Cate What is it that keeps au­ the same basic formula: along with them. grandparents, they decided ments that make up the Bill Marquis, Jennifer Meahan, iences interested, though? highly secrec research goes In summation, beware, not to let it go. of Rights or even who the Jeremy Zschau and Janaca orror has become a near­ awry and a deadly virus is all you technophiles. All Anyone who is a twenty- current Speaker of the House Scherer. niversal genre, one that released into the environ­ your advances and break­ ends to remain popular ment, which turns any and throughs are giving us is espite changes in the zeit­ all affected by the synthetic more terrifying - and more eist, unlike more "niche disease into bloodthirsty realistic - nightmare fuel. enres" such as science zombies - something that Jeremy Zschau is the lction. Each decade since even the most creative and Opinions Editor and a col­ he 19305 has had its own innovative film writer of umnist for The Current. 1811:hc (DJrrrnt I OctOBER 24, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I OPINIONS SCIENCE MATTERS MAD WORLD

Zombie an-ts and vamp~re bats:' With October comes the return the "undea " of the animal wo Id o the sexy costume epidemic

I like to cast around for a land nearby and walk up to iL It's HallO\veen, and everyone Nemo" and thought, "Hmro, Halloween-themed subjea for The vampire bat makes a sm

real-world crearures: zombie "ampire bat is one of only (\'i'0 animals or household objectS bur matching thjgh-high toc.kings ants and vampire bats. species that are good walkers. also look really sex)" at me same and a 1\' t tail. Th prOOua de- Neither one is a threat to Unlike most other bats, vam­ time, bur not anym re. \-X;e live cription d rises omune-seek.ers

mankind and which is '\ . rse pir es ape by QlIIying wa. T in a world where a v. man 'will to m e a sexy and slippery might depend on whether one perhaps to prevent awakened ne'.er have [0 be an W1St").)' \' '- h this Halloween in our sex} is an ant or a cow. Which is the prey £i'om stepping on them. (ate Marquis 'on ofany thing on Hall 'eel1 strapl Nern osrume an creepier stor:' might depend on It also allO\\5 them to quickly ifs he pends enougl time on y u'll be the sexi koi in the

personal tastes. rerum co resume feeding. jlill.o-l envil nments. 1 he ams Google. pondt Because r. y n knows tap? Ifnor those, what ab ut Vampire bats pr Ton emIe, According to a 200 Cornell n in the canopy bur descend For insrnnc , 11mV) u can be there' nothing sexier than a lime sexy danboard? rase>..')' not people. Vampire bats are me UnhrersiC) study vampire bars to th furest Roor (Q forag , a !>eX) food! Yand '.com· Sexy lost bah, fuh. pool tabl . The fun that these only manunals chat feed only nut 0.11.1:' v\·alk but could a Ul­ her the fungal infection W. rermeio11, travroerry an If'Naughty emo'" n't inanimate object costum are

on blood. Ther feed only after ally run. llsing their po,;verfltl OCCI. . B nani cosrumes consist of right fOr - u, ur you cill L b } bas n obj , th, t men dark and on the same victim, forelimbs to Frapel them. Th fu.n ~ directs th m.ini dresses in the app r pIia wam to be 5ei..")' vers.i n of rypically nj y is pLllely

er... prey; OVer several nighrs. Like other blood-feeders behavior of th ants, em ing co.l r. Or h w < bout a uSexy Bag a character uu m your dUld­ co in . enml. But rather than being nati es \CImpire batS need a w-a· to th m to spend mor; tim on of kiules? If) u have a fu· rire hood., then perhaps nsider If the sexllal.iza.tion of ofTransylvania, vampire bats prevent meir prey' blood.&om searching for lea\ , befu , th ~ :and/ , theres aIm t definitely a ne of the cound Rain ¥. random h usehold it IDS, foods :IT'::: tound only in Central and clotting as th .' feed. Their 'uCLllmb [0 th parJS.i in a cosrun 'ersion of ir that doe.l1! Brir , uawberrv hortcake and fimy beasts do 1't interest Soum AmeriCA. saliva comains an anticoagulant gruesome fas hion. rimar ly, go l-laSt your knees. or T ~ bell cosrum . Ifth e you, £ear not! 0 matt rv.hat There are three vampire bat substan called, appropriately, the fungus drives the yino- ants If 'Qua refer to be a bever­ uansfomlauon from beloved 'our tastes may be, ml:l"eSa '0' species: Desmodus ratun- draculin. However, vampire bats to damp onto the unde ide age, however perhaps consider fictional aracter to mck, seh1. Hallm .11. osrume to suit you. dus (common vampire bat), do not really suck blood, as they of a leaf biting around th leaf so..}' glassware cosrum : the site fantasy mal,-es y ur soul w Are you majoring in crimin.a1 Diphylla eClUdara (hairy-legged lap it up from the wound site~ vein and suspending it above "Beer M ug' COSillm is a weird, dlere are alW'

bat). Vampire bats weigh aboUt nigh ,th bat 11'- a .....yay to body f tb am remains at- those who ,\ L I t ro mIld m COStunle: mar indud ponchos, some years in a Ph.D . proQT"am? 3 co 40 grams. 1he common find the same an imal. ag in. A tach to the bo m of me leaf sexyan.irruls. there ilft:~' sombreros and me word 'oor- Choose a sexy graduate COS(lUlle, \"ampire bars feed on m ~unmals 200G resea.rch study d ribed after in; eam. rocIem cosrumes (skunk.<; :md d r" m 'h in the prooua because wb· pet your degr in "hile the other two species how npire bats can IdentifY The fungus cannor grow in raccoons, re."'ause w hat's der d _ ri ption' the wlcl "china something illy like rnpamti pr fer birds. They range from [heir victirns b r [heir bream­ th canopy r on rh fo rest oar than picking througb Qa.rbage doll" and " eisha" looks where urerarure or macroeconomics lexico to Argentina. ing, much as we can IdentifY but me dead ams attach (Q and rodents \ ho em produce when you can earn one in being Feeding on blood is called i.ndividu .•'lls by thei.r voices. me leaves are' at just the right me smell of rorren ~?) and sexy instead! 1hats a skill )'Qu hematophagy, literally blood­ While me original prey of h 'ght with me right rempera­ myclu.c:tl crearures (unicorns and can rake all the way ro me banl­ eating. Seve.r-J..I animals feed on common vampire bats 'were rure and humidit)~ ma..wruz brighcly-colored 5eX-y tigers cllat " a ' . mm - an if. ou like banks, ,vb}' l10r . blood, including leeches, mos­ rainforest tnanllnals, m .,' fun gus !rrowth. The ~ous presumably hail fr m :l mythi­ the n1.:,uk t, which L:-illy in- be a 5eX.-y bank robber? quitoes, ticks and lampre{ eels. reported!, otten feed on CAttle conTInU to gro on the dea calland ofweird.l)· sexualized clud take "Pocahottie" pigmjls, 1£ atter all th ch ices ~ .lile some are opporrunistic DL)"W . 1his is less because of an ant, producing a fruiting bod/ animals . frin gee! ld bead everything, . ou'rc: till undecided, pick a ran­ blood-feeders, others are obli­ acquired taste for beef blood but that sproUts from irs head and Perhaps the m st disClll ing and a health) dose of racial dom sporr, eer or activi and gate hematophages, meaning beclUse car:de are more available releases spores that fill on ancs of them all are m :y cosrum . insensi tivi ty: theres most likely a sexy costume they must drink blood. Vampire and easily accessible. ,;valking across the forest Roor versions fcharaaers fin m Ify oua. prefer t be a sex)' of it, compler wim mini dress atS are the latter. Other species ZDmbie ancs are the victims below. Researchers have found beloved chiJdren's films and random inanimate ob ject. -why and marching thigh-highs. In that feed on blood, such as ticks ofa srrange infection. The "graveyards oE20 to 30 such television shmv'$. For the r:vvi<;ted nor choose to be a sexy remote th wide and sometimes disuirb­ and mosquitoes, are more of a world is full of parasites using a dead anrs attached (Q the wlder­ soul who watched "Finding control or pethaps a sexy beer ing world of sexy Hallov.reen health threat but mere is some­ variety of straregies on hoses, of­ sides ofleavc:s in a square merer. . ming creepy about vampire ten manipulating host behavior. So what do YOU thin.k? Are bats. Onlva fe\ of mem employ as wmbie ants or vampire bats And creepy is the right starrling a strategy of behavioral creepier? Personally, I would say word Vampire bats creep up on control as the fimgus Ophio­ mat leeches are creepier than WHAT DO YOU THINK? their prey co feed only at night, cordyceps wlllateralis, which either of them, as mey aaually when their prey are sleeping. infects canopy-living carpenter do sometimes feed on human Let us know at www.thecurrent-online.com Mer locating me prey, they ancs, Camponotus leonardi, in blood. Bvvaa-haa-haal WWW.THECURRENT-ONlINE.COM OCTOBER 24, 2011 ~hf Q1}rrrnt 19 CURRENT H OROSCOPES by The Inane Collective altered by: Mediocrity and Reality the Interns

~ SAGITTARIUS ~ CAPRICORN Il~ (Nov. 23 - DEC. 22) . f1Tt!.J (DEC. 23 - JAN. 20) As usual, you were, are, and Boys will be a problem for This week, as in all other Your closest friends and always will be broke. Dirt you. Boyfriends will be dicks. weeks, avoid beets, beans, coworkers will finally listen broke. You will never make Fathers will disapprove of beef, or whatever else might to you and take your much enough to support your hob­ everything you do. Brothers make you fart. Oh, and have a needed advice. And they will - bies. You'll be lucky to support will steal your stuff. And if happy birthday! Unless it isn't still ruin everything you care yourself. Back to work, wage your a man, someone else's your birthday. about, because they suck. slave. boyfriend wi II beat you up.

ARIES GEMINI ¥ - ~ (MARCH ~1 - APRIL 20) ( M AY 22 - JUNE 21) You have been wallowing in Your closest support system Your favorite sports team your own mis~ry for years Concratulations, you have has decided that it is the will lose. All the time. And no now and no one seems to finally drunk your liver under , perfect time to pack up and matter who you talk to about care. And you know what, the table. Good job. Good luck head out, leaving you to fend it, none of them will care, be­ you might want to paint on a paying your hospital bills with for yourself, alone in the wide cause you are an alien aban­ smile, becase they probably your crap insurance. worlld. Good luck, sucker. doned on Earth as punishment never will. for your past misdeeds.

LIBR A CANCER (SEPT, 24 - OCT. 2 3) (JUNE 22 - JULY 22) Even your dealer won't talk to You've always been the one You will never gain approval. You adventurous devil, you you nowadays. He knows you everyone comes to for advice From anyone. Every laugh finally travelled abroad. And can't afford what he's got. and reassurance, and now will be a laugh at you. Every now you're all alone. You Hope you have some gullible that you have problems of criticism will be pointed and didn't find your true home, friends with spare cash. And your own, expect them to rest mean. You will never achieve you just found one more place your mother said you'd never firmly on your own shoulders mediocrity, so stop trying. where no one wants you. amount to anything. along with everyone else's.

Are you planning to graduate this semester? Have you applied for graduation?

I(notl visit your academic advisor today!!! 2011 DECEMBER C01n11ZenCe1nent SATURDAY, DECEMBER 17 MARK TWAIN BUILDING EACH CEREMONY WILL BE APPROXIMATELY 1'/2 HOURS IN LENGTH . No tickets required_ 10 A.M. - College of Education - College of Nursing - College of Fine Arts & Communication - School of Social Work - BGS/BIS F,I A T T - Who needS health care - Master of Public Policy Administration ~ - -dual Mandate : October 19th- The 'Indl.V"l. 2 P.M. - College of Arts and Sciences anyways? 6 P.M. - College of Business Administration Dr. Margaret Bar n Burke 'In- CensUS N UInbers Mean BXG - UMSLlWU Joint Undergraduate Engineering Program N ovember 2 nd-The Resu1ts Are • . - Missouri University S& T-Engineering Education Cener Ohanges f or MO , Wi.ll.ia.m E_ Wlntf3r Dr - . the City All Graduating Seniors Don't Miss the Grad Fair DeceU'Lber 7th - Hom.eless 1.D. November 1, 2, 3 ot the UMSL Bookstore Activcrte your Free Alumni Membership!, Dr. Margaret She rra.de n • Get a FREE cupcake and hat chocolate from in the MSC • 11 a.m. - 7 p.m. Purchase your cap, gown and tassels, etc. S.IA. I November 1, 2, 3 Mire available in bookstore after the-;e • At the Grod Fair, MSC - ~ookstore dotes but a S10 late fee will apply after Stop by the UMSl Alumni Asso[icrtion Table Monday, November 2B . Vi;if the UMSL Commencement website at umsl.edu/commenc~ment for more ~~formotion and to pre·register for your commencement photos wrth Grodlmages . 20 l 1Chr Q:UITcnt I OCTOBER 24, 2011 I WWW.THECURRENT-ONLlNE.COM I I COMICS

Simply Beagle y Karlee Sellars

T . f ~ t-OQ c.o ~- t-o () () A y-..J-- Y) o vJ t o h rr o - t;, ' ~ Ov.ts. rA..<-r v-'"'J w- ~J ~ N. + c;- 5 ,' l?~

~v -u J Q l)e. s p(. r~ on' > 0 \At ~ "'\ 0 ! ..:J"t.I'l ' " . t.J(;\ ~ t-) A tA sh o~ Wher-L ~ e. .. "tJ.""bnJJ '7 u ()....V'\ 0 W- '" ,j t t t >

JOPLI N HUM A N E.. SOC I ETY ' T-SH I RT SAL E

ALL PROCEEDS WILL BENEFIT JOPLIN HUMANE SOCIETY TO HELP IN THEIR EFFORTS TO REUNITE 4LEGGED TORNADO ICTIMS WITH THEIR OWNERS. AVAILABLE IN YOUR CHOICE OF PINK, NAVY, OR BLACK. ADULT SIZES S-XXXl AND IN CHILD SIZE,S. ORDER YOURS TODAY

WWW.)OPLINHuMANETsHIRTS.WEBS.COM $15 MINIMUM DONATION THANK YOU!