Rosedale Open Homepage

SEASON 2, ISSUE 2: May 7th, 2004 The Rosedale Open homepage: http://www.pvv.ntnu.no/~janbu/ropen.html

Contents ======1. Introduction 2. Broadcast messages 3. Apprentices discovered 4. League results 5. League tables 6. Scorer’s lists 7. Suspensions 8. GMs auction 9. Transferlist 10.Sale to non-league 11. Private trade 12. League matches next issue 13. the Rosedale Knockout 14. GM's ramble 15. List of addresses

1. Introduction

Refer to GM's ramble, section 14.

2. Broadcast messages

Trond K. Botnen, Call of Cthulhu: «la! Shub-Niggurath! The Goat of the Woods with a Thousand Young!»

Car Park Rangers brings us: «SCANDAL

Curvy Caroline Kissentell, 21 from Tadfield, has exclusively revealed to the Rosedale Sun that she has been having an affair with Rangers' new siging Malcolm Middle.

Lots of topless pictures and maybe a few words inside.»

Darius Molloy, Dangermouse: «Good luck for the new season and… watch out here I come»

Sean «Blue» Cable, DC Red Hot and Blues: «And the season begins and just in time for the cicadas!»

King Crimson, Dead Dino Storage: «Knowledge is a deadly friend When no one sets the rules The fate of all mankind I see Is in the hands of fools Confusion will be my epitaph»

Luke Matthews, Floating Windy City: «From out of the sun we come through the air we soar, and from the skies we will poop all over you..»

Jørgen Bjørnelv, Galaxy Brothers: «Hello all! GL to everyone;)»

Eric Billot, FC Gnome: «Well, here goes nothing !! Da Gnomers are going to rock this season :-)»

Espen Chr. Brill, Grorud Grasshuggers: «Oh, no, not another learning experience!»

Espen Chr. Brill, Grunts United: «All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.»

Darth Vehusheia, Jedi Order: «Let darkness guide me» Espen Chr. Brill, Monkey Business: «Hordes o'ruthlessly trained monkeys be hidden away deep within t'bowels o't'park...bound t'immense machines o'destruction and family.»

Håvard Pettersen, Odd Athletics: «Hello people! This is Odd speaking... I want a waffle!»

Seth Owen, Pirates Haven: «Ther she be boyz, our next victims run out the plank lets see the woman folk walk it»

Ian Moes, Saturday Morning FC: «You may think I've lost the plot but I prefer to look at it as innovative. The game is constantly evolving and I think it won't be long before you see all teams follow our lead and deploy a sponge in goal. And you might not think much of a couple of mice, but I tell you these guys just may take over the world one night! »

Paul Riley, Sleep Wanderers: «Wake up!»

Owen Blagae, Stranraer Reserves: «We won the cup, we won the cup, eayadio, we won the cup!!! UEFA Cup?»

"Big Bad" Wolf, Toy Town Rovers: «I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your goal down.»

Tor Magne Tønnessen, Underdogs FC: «Did anyone remember to bring the ball?»

3. Apprentices discovered the Ancients: Eohippus, Euoplocephalus, Heterodontosaurus Camarilla Divided: Alvin 'Bookie' Cheltenham, Charlie 'Smallpox' Guthrie, Paige 'Heihei' Duff Car Park Rangers: Dick Grayson, Remy Le Beau, Tommy Monaghan Call of Cthulhu: Dagon, Nyogtha, Yig Grorud Grasshuggers: Butch Bulldozer, SnooSnoo, Tingelingling Grunts United: Defty Metalspike, Tenzy Tenz, Trolluc Troeffel Jedi Order: Darth Malek, Darth Revan Muppets: Kermit Saturday Morning FC: Pinky, Sponge Bob Square Pants, The Brain Stranraer Reserves: Mark Miclos, Ruud Van Driver, Seamus MacShort Lower Tadfield Apocalypse: Agnes Nutter, Sergeant Thomas Deisenburger, The delivery man ANU FC: Raging Bull, Slim Jim, Totally Ives the Blitzball Team: Auron, Botta, Ophelia Coventry: Mikey Michaels, Walter Mitty Desassossego Blues: Barao de Teive, Raphael Baldaya, Thomas Crosse Gangsters United: B-gjengen, Dr. Evil, The Joker Mishima Zaibatsu: Anna Williams, Prototype Jack, Yoshimitsu New Bremen Cyberdruids: Dominic 'Victim' Hobson, Gregory, Victor Hocks Sale Savoyards: Chancellor, Hilarian, Sam Trivial Brief Association: Navarra Rifle Knight, Norwegian Baker Assembly, Raw Acrobatic Flyer Toy Town Rovers: Baby Bear, Daddy Bear, Mommy Bear Dangermouse: Baron Silas Greenback II, Miss Boathook, The Fog Monster Dead Dino Storage: OSI, The Tangent, Transatlantic FC Gnome: Dorg Baa, Khor Onrazor Pocket Valley Philosophers: Thales Sheffield Thursday: Mark Byzewski, Steve Telofski

4. League results

Rosedale Open Match day 1 ======

Muppets - Grorud Grasshuggers 6 : 1 Scorers: Rizzo Rat (16., 74., 86.), Lew Zealand (34.), Swedish Chef (13.), Marvin Suggs (59.) ***--- Penalties: - ***1 Sent off: Swedish Chef (51.) ***--- Booked: Marvin Suggs ***Felix Leiter Two new Rosedale Open participants face off in the first round, and the home team left no doubt at all which was the strongest team - in fact, their rough play was the only thing giving Grorud a noticeable chance for a draw. Will the Grasshuggers struggle to keep their place? Call of Cthulhu - Camarilla Divided 1 : 1 Scorers: Yog-Sothoth (37.) ***Ozzy 'Puppet' Mandrill (82.) Booked: --- ***Charlie 'Smallpox' Guthrie, Paige 'Heihei' Duff If there is such a thing as a top match in the first round, this is it. Surprisingly, Trond Botnen didn't urge the Lurking Fear forward at all, and while their chances of winning were fairly good, Generation X managed to pull off a somewhat lucky point, to the disappointment of the Necronomicon.

Jedi Order - Sportf†narna United 1 : 0 Scorers: Leia Organa Solo (18.) ***--- Penalties: - ***- (1 missed) Booked: Quinlan Vos ***Pig-Tailed Girl A fairly even match in a galaxy far, far away saw the Lightside take an early lead, and when the Dust Stompers failed to convert their penalty, it was all in all a fairly deserved home win. the Ancients - Stranraer Reserves 3 : 1 Scorers: Nanotyrannus (15., 40., 78.) ***Cormac Rees Reeks (24.) Penalties: - (1 missed) ***- Booked: Nanotyrannus ***Jim Eanit With the Blues weakened by suspensions, newcomers the Ancients show that they can put up a fight even in the top division.

Car Park Rangers - Lower Tadfield Apocalypse 0 : 10 Scorers: --- ***Newton Pulsifer (37., 52., 70., 83., 84.), Dr. Raven Sable (13., 63.), Anthony J. Crowley (7., 24.), Seaman White (74.) Booked: --- ***The delivery man With Car Park Rangers facing suspensions, last year's winner start off with a two-digit away win.

Grunts United - Saturday Morning FC 3 : 1 Scorers: Mean Middlefielder (5., 14., 58.) ***The Tick (39.) Last season's medalists, Greenskins, starts out with a comfortable home win against the 2D's.

Rosedale Open Match day 2 ======

Camarilla Divided - Jedi Order 3 : 2 Scorers: Pierre 'Shotgun' Duval (53., 84.), Bill the Clueless Brujah (49.) *** Aayla Secura (63.), Quinlan Vos (18.) The Lightside surprisingly started out with a 1-0 goal, and went on to keep the lead until half time. In the second half, Generation X demonstrates that they are the stronger team, and although they won, the result clearly flatters the away team.

Sportf†narna United - Muppets 3 : 2 Scorers: Mousse (32.) ***--- Penalties: 2 ***2 Booked: Akane Tendo, Genma Saotome, Pig-Tailed Girl ***Floyd Pepper, Marvin Suggs This match at Bollstadion is primarily rememberable for it's hyperactive referee. Five yellow cards may not be out of the ordinary, but four penalties is pretty much. The away team was somewhat stronger, but the Accidents accidentally left their lucky socks at home, and the youth of Furinkan cheer along with F†narnas Hooligans.

Grorud Grasshuggers - Call of Cthulhu 0 : 5 Scorers: --- ***Nyarlathotep (1., 50., 63., 88.), Ithaqua (61.) Penalties: - ***- (1 missed) Booked: Larry Longbottom ***Azathoth, Hastur, Tsathoggua, Yog-Sothoth The Grasshuggers are having trouble adapting to the higher level even at Grorud Orchard and Community Center, as the Lurking Fear takes two important away points, challenging for the top spots.

Lower Tadfield Apocalypse - Grunts United 1 : 0 Penalties: 1 ***- Booked: Sergeant Thomas Deisenburger ***Murky Musksmell Mirroring the opposite match last year, the home team wins 1-0 on a penalty. Tehee! :-)

Saturday Morning FC - the Ancients 0 : 3 Scorers: --- ***Nanotyrannus (18.), Trilobite (3.), Morosaurus (40.) Booked: --- ***Fred Flintstone With the hometeam completely unspirited at home, the Oldtimers take advantage and grab both points, looking to have established themselves very well in Rosedale Open.

Stranraer Reserves - Car Park Rangers 9 : 0 Scorers: Heiyu Hoyahamahia (37., 48., 89.), Hwan Long Dong (4., 61.), Hassan Al Ergi (19.), Ivan Asticov (53.), Cormac Rees Reeks (67.), Jacques Ancelit (68.) ***--- Penalties: - ***- (1 missed) Booked: Cormac Rees Reeks ***--- Stranraer attempted to field 10 players, but Hwan Long Dong stormed onto the field and gave them a lead that they never gave away. As for the Powers, what's there to say... quo vadis, Car Park?

Lexington League Match day 1 ======

Mishima Zaibatsu - New Bremen Cyberdruids 1 : 0 Scorers: Lee Chaolan (89.) ***--- Booked: Kazuya Mishima ***--- Life is good, unlife is not quite as good, is the conclusion from the Iron Fist Tournament today.

ANU FC - Coventry 5 : 9 Scorers: Woo Woo (68., 83.), Wibbles (15., 22.), Whinging Bitch (88.) ***Oliver Queen (3., 32., 48., 59., 77.), Harry Shimmy (26.), Carl Crocker (43.) Penalties: - ***2 Booked: --- ***Henry McCoy The Quiz Champs were intent on giving the Sky Blues a harsh welcome to Lexington League, but Coventry's improving form from late last season seems to keep going, and although the away win was somewhat lucky, they played a strong game.

Toy Town Rovers - Gangsters United 3 : 1 Scorers: "Big Bad" Wolf (79.), Bluebeard (55.), Daddy Bear (37.) ***--- Penalties: - ***1 Booked: Prince Charming ***--- Tonight's bataille at the Stadium of Night saw the Fables dominate the Mobsters to a comfortable home win. The home team wanted to win, and so they did!

Desassossego Blues - Ladish Sausage 8 : 0 Scorers: Alvaro de Campos (6 goal$s), Ricardo Reis (26.), Alberto Caeiro (44.) ***--- the Mad Cows were without two key players, their manager and their fighting spirit, and was thoroughly slaughtered at Athena Stadium. Orpheus is already looking to Rosedale Open next season, with this amazing start of the new season.

Fishwick Old Contemptibles - Sale Savoyards 0 : 2 Scorers: --- ***Strephon (15.), Mountararat (30.) Booked: --- ***Ralph The Singers saw no reason to stop winning, just because they got promoted, and shows the Fishies that without the Docherty/Cowburn duo there'll be no returning to Rosedale Open. the Blitzball Team - Trivial Brief Association 2 : 0 Scorers: Tidus (9., 33.) ***--- Zanarkand Memorial Stadium hasn't become any easier for visitors by the change of season, as even the Shorties fall clearly short. Can the Blitzballers compete for promotion this season? At least this match gives them a valuable two point lead over TBA.

Lexington League Match day 2 ======

Coventry - Toy Town Rovers 7 : 3 Scorers: Robbie Starr (19., 42., 74.), Harry Shimmy (34., 55.), Carl Crocker (17., 66.) ***Bluebeard (59.), Robin Hood (77.), Daddy Bear (21.) Booked: --- ***Robin Hood The Fables didn't have much to put up against the Sky Blues at Highfield Road, and although the numbers are big, the result definitely flatters the visitors. Things are definitely looking up for Coventry so far!

Gangsters United - Mishima Zaibatsu 8 : 1 Scorers: Tony Soprano (31., 54., 77., 86.), Teddy KGB (5., 19.), John Gotti (45.), Al Capone (12.) ***--- Penalties: - ***1 With their karma sorted out, the Mobsters roll easily over those who heed the call. Gangsters are clearly one of the strongest teams in the league system, and although bad luck kept them out of Rosedale Open this season, time will tell whether they can gain promotion for next year.

New Bremen Cyberdruids - ANU FC 0 : 1 Scorers: --- ***Gio (61.) Sent off: --- ***Dominator (80.) Booked: --- ***Ageing The Cyberdruids slumps for the relegation zone after being beaten by a superiorly fighting bunch of Quiz Champs.

Sale Savoyards - the Blitzball Team 1 : 0 Scorers: Mountararat (8.) ***--- A top match after both teams winning their first round, sees the Singers in great form, being the best team, and converting it for two points and a good position in the promotion race. The Blitzballers give up two points, but will surely keep fighting to stay in the same race.

Trivial Brief Association - Desassossego Blues 3 : 0 Scorers: KLM (45.), Receiver of Message (89.) ***--- Penalties: 1 ***- the Blues came back to earth quickly, with a deserved defeat at Out Of Range. With this, both teams sit firmly near the middle of the table.

Ladish Sausage - Fishwick Old Contemptibles 7 : 0 Scorers: Silvio 'Linguine' Linknowski (4., 33.), Caro 'Giblets' Czylick (23., 73.), Beatrice 'Louise' Dumbrowski (60.), Donald 'Pops' Poppanowski (30.), Dickie 'Little Smoky'Wisnewski (68.) ***--- With neither manager present, the Mad Cows roll easily over the Fishies, giving Otto's Meats something to cheer for while they're waiting for manager Setzer's return.

Berkeley Conference Match day 1 ======

Shock & Awe - Dangermouse 5 : 1 Scorers: Trevor Roe (4., 34., 54., 77.), Rashid Ali (75.) ***Dangermouse (14.) Shock & Awe gets a great start for the new season, without manager Bill White present. Lucky charms won't help Dangermouse if they can't perform better than this.

the Nightfall Dreamers - Dead Dino Storage 1 : 2 Scorers: Declan Adams (37.) ***The Flower Kings (21., 55.) Booked: --- ***OSI the Ambience were without their manager, and the lack of fighting spirit gave DDS just enough room to convert the match to a valuable away win.

Satanic Wonder Hamsters - Sleep Wanderers 4 : 0 Scorers: Rolf Rolfsson (77.), Sven Svensson (8.), Robin Robinsson (68.) ***--- Penalties: 1 ***- The rabid Hamsters, fresh from the forge again, defeats fellow freshmen Night Terrors at the Hole with convincing 4-0. They were once again without their manager, though - how long can they hold out without managerial help?

Pocket Valley Philosophers - FC Gnome 3 : 0 Scorers: Descartes (22.), Jaspers (25.), Schlegel (77.) ***--- Booked: --- ***Alain Socquet, Marc Desailly, Nicalo Anka the Drunken Thinkers were very close to qualifying for Lexington League, and it shows. A quite convincing victory at the Pocket Valley Bowl against fellow contenders FC Gnome.

First Men of Rome - Odd Athletics 5 : 2 Scorers: Gaius Julius Caesar (29., 32., 47.), Maximus Decimus Meridius (85.) ***Odd Gunnar Sollie (6., 44.) Penalties: 1 ***- The home advantage is vital between teams fresh from generation, and so too in this match at Colosseum. The Weirdoes will have to come back stronger at Strangeworld. Convincing and solid from the Toga Boys.

Sheffield Thursday - Monkey Business 3 : 0 Scorers: Mike Virgilio (20., 39., 90.) ***--- Penalties: - (1 missed) ***- Booked: Collin Weir, Marc McClure ***--- The Owls continue their impressive form, and when they refused to come to Stan's for special prices, the Pirates Wannabe just kept waving their swords around like feather-dusters.

Berkeley Conference Match day 2 ======

Dead Dino Storage - Satanic Wonder Hamsters 2 : 1 Scorers: The Flower Kings (24.), Spock's Beard (69.) ***Sture Sturesson (3.) DDS edges out the Hamsters in a close match, and put themselves in prime position for promotion this year. Will Robin return to the Hole in time?

Sleep Wanderers - Shock & Awe 8 : 3 Scorers: Corinthian (4., 44., 69., 78.), Fiddlers Green (54., 71.), Mazikeen (37., 88.) ***Trevor Roe (61., 75.), Cervesa Fria (41.) Booked: Mazikeen ***--- the Elvii couldn't bring much spirit into the Chargers, and the Dreamers could applaud their beloved Night Terrors rolling like a juggernaut to victory.

Dangermouse - the Nightfall Dreamers 4 : 1 Scorers: Count Duckula (35., 45.), Leatherhead (57.), Nero (23.) ***Alex Summers (52.) An easy home win for the Mouseketeers, with a manager to guide them, as opposed to the visitors.

Odd Athletics - Sheffield Thursday 3 : 0 Scorers: Odd Gunnar Sollie (17.) ***--- Penalties: 2 ***- (1 missed) Booked: Odd Aage Moose ***Mark Byzewski The Weirdoes manages to grab both points against in-form Owls, and thus keeps up with the group.

Monkey Business - Pocket Valley Philosophers 5 : 2 Scorers: Skeleton Bob (24., 64., 68.), Guybrush Threepwood (54.) ***Schlegel (63.), Nietzsche (37.) Penalties: 1 (1 missed) ***- Booked: --- ***Marx, Schelling, Schlegel A very even match at Scumm Bar sees the home team keep both points after an impressive performance from Skeleton Bob, cheered on by the Pirates of Monkey Island. The Reflected Hooligans demand team strengthening in order to gain promotion.

FC Gnome - First Men of Rome 1 : 1 Scorers: Lend Er (38.) ***Gaius Julius Caesar (78.) Toga Boys managers to secure a point in the Gnome's Garden with a late match equalizing goal from Caesar.

Kirkwood Showdown Match day 1 ======

Batt in Blax - Lords 4 : 3 Scorers: Shane Bond (19., 25.), Daryl Tuffey (56.), Chris Martin (85.) ***Nimam Pojma (3.), Tisik Reten (31.) Penalties: - ***1 Booked: Stephen Fleming ***--- An even and very exciting match at Eden Park sees the Black Caps barely getting away with the win. Nice try, Lords!

Bananas United - Pirates Haven 5 : 3 Scorers: Moritz Waser (37., 52.), Shagrath (41., 87.), Hugo Haugan (11.) ***One Eyed Jack (86.), Black Beard (67.), Bald Benny (17.) Booked: --- ***Handless Harold, Swashbuckler The only team without a manager in Kirkwood Showdown manages to keep both points at home - it's hard to make up for the home advantage in strategy the first round.

Refridgerator Heaven - Brazil Star Conquerors 1 : 1 Scorers: --- ***Ronaldo (3.) Penalties: 1 ***- Booked: --- ***Carlos Alberto, Gerson With an early goal from Ronaldo, the 5-Stars manages a draw Up in the Sky, making the Power Grid despair.

World Ambassadors - DC Red Hot and Blues 3 : 3 Scorers: Scott Fort (3.), Christian Wyatt (80.) ***Eric Birch (39., 70., 85.) Penalties: 1 ***- Booked: Russ Bynum ***Brad Excel, Padraig O'Brien Kirkwood's first robbery comes with this lucky away point for DC - and with it they are in a good position, if they can convert their own home match. the Bluebonnet Plague - Floating Windy City 6 : 3 Scorers: Gary Hatfield (4., 16.), Bill Weahdabebieetsaboi (69.), Robert Josephine (49.), Isaac Losado (67.), Neph Contreras (45.) ***Paul Bender (43., 68.), Adam Graves (20.) Bluebonnet's manager dropped in casually late for the match, but it seems this was enough; his team converting well and turning an otherwise quite even match into nice digits for Kraft Foods Inc. The Talons a bit disappointed in the wasted opportunity, is nonetheless encouraged by the entertainment and quality that was provided.

Galaxy Brothers - Underdogs FC 3 : 5 Scorers: Mario Fandersen (2., 51.) ***Trond R›nningen (8., 29.), Gunnar Hansen (52., 68.) Penalties: 1 ***1 Booked: Morten Washy ***Jesus Fernandez, Paul Hansson, Rolf Heier With convincing skills, the Underdogs weren't underdogs at all - the Doghouse cheered them to an impressive win at Galaxy Stadium, the Chefs likely needing some kind of reinforcement.

Kirkwood Showdown Match day 2 ======

Pirates Haven - Refridgerator Heaven 1 : 0 Scorers: Pegleg Pete (1.) ***--- The Buccaneers get an early goal from Pegleg Pete, and rides the lead until full time, to the cheers of the Brigg.

Brazil Star Conquerors - Batt in Blax 3 : 5 Scorers: Dunga (39., 87.), Rivelino (8.) ***Stephen Fleming (3., 84.), Daryl Tuffey (27.), Craig McMillan (51.) Penalties: - ***1 Booked: Rivelino ***Shane Bond In an even and entertaining match at ER's Arena, the Black Caps actually manage to put in more goals than the 5-Stars, boosting them up the table.

Lords - Bananas United 4 : 0 Scorers: Tisik Reten (29., 44.), Neb Luzi (77.), Bejzi Ukurz (56.) ***--- Lords easily roll over managerless Bananas United.

Floating Windy City - Galaxy Brothers 6 : 2 Scorers: Luke Masochist (20., 66., 83.), Adam Graves (1., 32.), Paul Bender (78.) ***Mike Fandersen (61.), Nj†l Berg (23.) Booked: --- ***Morten Washy the Crimson Eagles have full control at Eagles Pearch, and the theory that the Chefs need reinforcement gains more weight.

Underdogs FC - World Ambassadors 3 : 0 Scorers: Liam Svensson (72., 88.), Paul Hansson (58.) ***--- Booked: --- ***Tony Burner The Underdogs shoot towards likely promotion with a rock solid performance at the Kennel. The Stabbers need to sharpen their knives!

DC Red Hot and Blues - the Bluebonnet Plague 4 : 1 Scorers: Eric Birch (2., 21., 65.), Darnell Anthony (52.) ***Bill Weahdabebieetsaboi (57.) Booked: Brad Excel ***--- The Riblets win at Army and Navy Park, and You Want Hot Sauce With That dances merrily around singing something about Berkeley. When manager Keith showed up at half-time, it was already too late for the Stinky Cheese to compete.

5. League tables

Rosedale Open ======home away diff goals points DP VP Cash Manager 1) Lower Tadfield 1 0 0 1 0 0 + 11 11: 0 4: 0 8 5.5 3885 Erlend Janbu 2) the Ancients 1 0 0 1 0 0 + 5 6: 1 4: 0 8 5 0 Henry Scarborough 3) Call of Cthulhu 0 1 0 1 0 0 + 5 6: 1 3: 1 16 4.5 3047 Trond K. Botnen 4) Camarilla Div. 1 0 0 0 1 0 + 1 4: 3 3: 1 8 5 596 Henry Scarborough 5) Stranraer Res. 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 7 10: 3 2: 2 12 4.5 2861 Owen Blagae 6) Muppets 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 4 8: 4 2: 2 30 4.5 1146 Ted Johnson 7) Grunts United 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 1 3: 2 2: 2 12 4.5 214 Espen Brill 8) Jedi Order 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 3: 3 2: 2 4 4 3313 J›rgen B. Vehusheia Sportf†narna U 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 3: 3 2: 2 20 4 3327 Ted Johnson 10) Saturday Morn. 0 0 1 0 0 1 - 5 1: 6 0: 4 8 3.5 2338 Ian Moes 11) Grorud Grassh. 0 0 1 0 0 1 - 10 1: 11 0: 4 12 3.5 2189 Espen Brill 12) Carpark Rangers 0 0 1 0 0 1 - 19 0: 19 0: 4 4 2 -315 Paul Riley

Lexington League ======home away diff goals points DP VP Cash Manager 1) Coventry 1 0 0 1 0 0 + 8 16: 8 4: 0 4 4.5 741 Peter J. Richardson 2) Sale Savoyards 1 0 0 1 0 0 + 3 3: 0 4: 0 12 5 3096 Stephen Othen 3) Gangsters Utd 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 5 9: 4 2: 2 0 4 604 Sigurd Eskeland 4) Desassossego B. 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 5 8: 3 2: 2 8 3.5 2061 yvind H. Henriksen 5) TBA 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 1 3: 2 2: 2 0 4 2912 Henry Scarborough 6) Blitzball Team 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 1 2: 1 2: 2 0 4 3302 Grete Scarborough 7) Ladish Sausage 1 0 0 0 0 1 - 1 7: 8 2: 2 0 3 1041 Ray Setzer 8) Toy Town Rovers 1 0 0 0 0 1 - 2 6: 8 2: 2 12 4 3377 Paul Riley 9) ANU FC 0 0 1 1 0 0 - 3 6: 9 2: 2 18 3 2983 Ian Moes 10) Mishima Zaibat. 1 0 0 0 0 1 - 6 2: 8 2: 2 12 4.5 658 Erlend Janbu 11) NB Cyberdruids 0 0 1 0 0 1 - 2 0: 2 0: 4 0 3.5 480 Erlend Janbu 12) Fishwick OC 0 0 1 0 0 1 - 9 0: 9 0: 4 0 2 2582 Ian Cowburn

Berkeley Conference ======home away diff goals points DP VP Cash Manager 1) Dead Dino Stor. 1 0 0 1 0 0 + 2 4: 2 4: 0 4 4.5 2256 Trond K. Botnen 2) FMO Rome 1 0 0 0 1 0 + 3 6: 3 3: 1 12 4.5 2200 Ian Moes 3) SW Hamsters 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 3 5: 2 2: 2 0 3 2140 Robin Ringstr”m 4) Sleep Wanderers 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 1 8: 7 2: 2 4 4 2180 Paul Riley 5) Monkey Business 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 5: 5 2: 2 0 3 1740 Espen Brill Odd Athletics 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 5: 5 2: 2 14 3 2140 H†vard Pettersen Pocket Valley P 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 5: 5 2: 2 34 4 -289 Simen F. J›rgensen 8) Sheffield Thu. 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 3: 3 2: 2 20 4 1676 Steve Janecek 9) Shock & Awe 1 0 0 0 0 1 - 1 8: 9 2: 2 0 3 2140 Bill White 10) Dangermouse 1 0 0 0 0 1 - 1 5: 6 2: 2 0 3 1765 Darius Molloy 11) FC Gnome 0 1 0 0 0 1 - 3 1: 4 1: 3 20 3 2238 Eric Billot 12) Nightfall Dr. 0 0 1 0 0 1 - 4 2: 6 0: 4 0 2 2100 Owen Riggs

Kirkwood Showdown ======home away diff goals points DP VP Cash Manager 1) Underdogs FC 1 0 0 1 0 0 + 5 8: 3 4: 0 16 5 1370 Tor Magne T›nnessen 2) Batt in Blax 1 0 0 1 0 0 + 3 9: 6 4: 0 12 5 2220 Darius Molloy 3) DC Red Hot 1 0 0 0 1 0 + 3 7: 4 3: 1 20 3.5 2160 Sean Cable 4) Lords 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 3 7: 4 2: 2 0 4 2180 Jaka Gorjan 5) Floating WC 1 0 0 0 0 1 + 1 9: 8 2: 2 4 3 2140 Luke Matthews 6) Bluebonnet Pla. 1 0 0 0 0 1 0 7: 7 2: 2 0 3 2140 Keith Greer-May 7) Pirates Haven 1 0 0 0 0 1 - 1 4: 5 2: 2 8 3 2140 Seth Owen 8) Bananas United 1 0 0 0 0 1 - 2 5: 7 2: 2 0 3 2140 Inge Simonsen(free) 9) Fridge Heaven 0 1 0 0 0 1 - 1 1: 2 1: 3 22 2.5 1869 Phil Sellars 10) Brazil Star C. 0 0 1 0 1 0 - 2 4: 6 1: 3 16 3.5 1660 Egbert Ferreira 11) W. Ambassadors 0 1 0 0 0 1 - 3 3: 6 1: 3 12 2.5 770 Daniel Ingesson 12) Galaxy Brothers 0 0 1 0 0 1 - 6 5: 11 0: 4 8 2 2100 J›rgen Bj›rnelv

6. Scorer's lists

Rosedale Open ------5 Newton Pulsifer (Lower Tadfield Apocalypse) 4 Nyarlathotep (Call of Cthulhu) 4 Nanotyrannus (the Ancients) 3 Rizzo Rat (Muppets) 3 Mean Middlefielder (Grunts United) 3 Heiyu Hoyahamahia (Stranraer Reserves) 2 Pierre 'Shotgun' Duval (Camarilla Divided) 2 Anthony J. Crowley (Lower Tadfield Apocalypse) 2 Dr. Raven Sable (Lower Tadfield Apocalypse) 2 Cormac Rees Reeks (Stranraer Reserves)

Lexington League ------6 Alvaro de Campos (Desassossego Blues) 5 Oliver Queen (Coventry) 4 Tony Soprano (Gangsters United) 3 Carl Crocker (Coventry) 3 Harry Shimmy (Coventry) 3 Robbie Starr (Coventry) 2 Teddy KGB (Gangsters United) 2 Woo Woo (ANU FC) 2 Wibbles (ANU FC) 2 Daddy Bear (Toy Town Rovers)

Berkeley Conference ------6 Trevor Roe (Shock & Awe) 4 Corinthian (Sleep Wanderers) 4 Gaius Julius Caesar (First Men of Rome) 3 The Flower Kings (Dead Dino Storage) 3 Odd Gunnar Sollie (Odd Athletics) 3 Skeleton Bob (Monkey Business) 3 Mike Virgilio (Sheffield Thursday) 2 Mazikeen (Sleep Wanderers) 2 Fiddlers Green (Sleep Wanderers) 2 Count Duckula (Dangermouse)

Kirkwood Showdown ------6 Eric Birch (DC Red Hot and Blues) 3 Tisik Reten (Lords) 3 Paul Bender (Floating Windy City) 3 Adam Graves (Floating Windy City) 3 Luke Masochist (Floating Windy City) 2 Daryl Tuffey (Batt in Blax) 2 Shane Bond (Batt in Blax) 2 Stephen Fleming (Batt in Blax) 2 Dunga (Brazil Star Conquerors) 2 Moritz Waser (Bananas United)

7. Suspensions Muppets: Swedish Chef (1) ANU FC: Dominator (1) Pocket Valley Philosophers: Nietzsche (1) Odd Athletics: Odd Golf Truck (1) Refridgerator Heaven: No Magnets (1)

8.GM's Auction

1) Mike Mehaffey M I 5 (Value: 563) for 750 to World Ambassadors 2) Pineapplehead D IV 6 (Value: 364) for 400 to Monkey Business 3) Kierkegaard S II 4 [1.5VP](Value: 480) for 1670 to Pocket Valley Philosophers 4) Tetsujin D I 9 (Value: 2364) for 1567 to Mishima Zaibatsu 5) Lenny Lesser F ap 10 (Value: 5182) for 3100 to Grunts United 6) Mauro Silva M III 5 (Value: 300) for 500 to Brazil Star Conquerors 7) No Leftovers D III 4 (Value: 173) for 251 to Refridgerator Heaven 8) Kevin Crooks D VII 7 (Value: 636) for 624 to Sheffield Thursday 9) Charles Search M IX 8 (Value: 910) for 650 to Desassossego Blues 10) Chris Ruffino F VIII 6 (Value: 318) for 612 to Sheffield Thursday 11) Ursuppe F I 8 [>12] (Value: 1977) for 2702 to the Ancients 12) Matthew Bright M sb 10 [2VP] (Value: 5491) for 2046 to Car Park Rangers 13) N‘ss D IX 8 (Value: 910) for 700 to Pocket Valley Philosophers 14) Gregory Alexopoulos M I 4 (Value: 329) for 600 to World Ambassadors 15) Yoohan Micout F II 2 (Value: 120) for 600 to FC Gnome 16) Christer Fjellfeldt G I 4 (Value: 640) for 850 to Underdogs FC 17) Juk-Shabb M II 5 [0.5VP](Value: 395) for 840 to Call of Cthulhu 18) Shadowland D II 5 [1.5VP](Value: 395) for 480 to Dead Dino Storage

New offers ------1) M I 6 (NL value 480) 2) S III 7 (NL value 560) 3) G I 4 [coaching costs: 0.5 VP] (NL value 640) 4) D I 11 (NL value 880) 5) D II 6 (NL value 360) 6) D VIII 4 [coaching costs: 2 VP] (NL value 0) 7) S VI 3 [coaching costs: 0.5 VP] (NL value 0) 8) D IV 12 (NL value 0) 9) G II 5 (NL value 600) 10) M II 7 (NL value 420) 11) F I 6 (NL value 480) 12) M IX 7 [coaching costs: 1.5 VP] (NL value 0) 13) F II 3 (NL value 180) 14) M sb 6 (NL value 720) 15) DF ap 5 (NL value 550) 16) DM II 5 (NL value 330) 17) F I 5 (NL value 400)

9.Transferlist

New offer ------1) From Lower Tadfield Apocalypse: Seaman White S II 7, coachable up to 10, 0 DP, Matches as F:3 (NL value 840) 2) From Coventry: Ricky Diver F II 2, coachable up to 5, 0 DP (NL value 120) 3) From Coventry: Donald Pass D II 3, coachable up to 6, 0 DP (NL value 180) 4) From Mishima Zaibatsu: Lei Wulong DF I 4, coachable up to 7, 0 DP (NL value 352) 5) From Mishima Zaibatsu: Jun Kazama D II 6, coachable up to 9, 0 DP (NL value 360) 6) From Dangermouse: Buggles Pigeon S II 1, coachable up to 4, 0 DP (NL value 120) 7) From Dangermouse: Baron Silas Greenback M I 2, coachable up to 5, 0 DP (NL value 160) 8) From Pocket Valley Philosophers (min 200 kKj): Hegel D I 2, coachable up to 5, 0 DP (NL value 160) 9) From Pocket Valley Philosophers (min 300 kKj): Schopenhauer D I 3, coachable up to 6, 0 DP (NL value 240)

10. Sales to the non-league

Saturday Morning FC: Grape Ape (360 kKj), Hal Jordan (198 kKj) Sale Savoyards: Frederick (60 kKj) 11. Private trade

None.

12. League matches next issue

Rosedale Open ======match day 3 match day 4 Muppets - Camarilla Div. : Camarilla Div. - Grorud Grassh. : Call of Cthulhu - Sportf†narna U : Sportf†narna U - Carpark Rangers : Grorud Grassh. - Saturday Morn. : Jedi Order - Muppets : Lower Tadfield - Stranraer Res. : the Ancients - Grunts United : Carpark Rangers - the Ancients : Saturday Morn. - Lower Tadfield : Grunts United - Jedi Order : Stranraer Res. - Call of Cthulhu :

Lexington League ======match day 3 match day 4 Mishima Zaibat. - Coventry : Coventry - NB Cyberdruids : ANU FC - Gangsters Utd : Gangsters Utd - Fishwick OC : NB Cyberdruids - TBA : Toy Town Rovers - Mishima Zaibat. : Sale Savoyards - Ladish Sausage : Desassossego B. - Blitzball Team : Fishwick OC - Desassossego B. : TBA - Sale Savoyards : Blitzball Team - Toy Town Rovers : Ladish Sausage - ANU FC :

Berkeley Conference ======match day 3 match day 4 Shock & Awe - Dead Dino Stor. : Dead Dino Stor. - Dangermouse : Nightfall Dr. - Sleep Wanderers : Sleep Wanderers - FMO Rome : Dangermouse - Monkey Business : SW Hamsters - Shock & Awe : Odd Athletics - FC Gnome : Pocket Valley P - Sheffield Thu. : FMO Rome - Pocket Valley P : Monkey Business - Odd Athletics : Sheffield Thu. - SW Hamsters : FC Gnome - Nightfall Dr. :

Kirkwood Showdown ======match day 3 match day 4 Batt in Blax - Pirates Haven : Pirates Haven - Lords : Bananas United - Brazil Star C. : Brazil Star C. - Bluebonnet Pla. : Lords - Underdogs FC : Fridge Heaven - Batt in Blax : Floating WC - DC Red Hot : W. Ambassadors - Galaxy Brothers : Bluebonnet Pla. - W. Ambassadors : Underdogs FC - Floating WC : Galaxy Brothers - Fridge Heaven : DC Red Hot - Bananas United :

13.Rosedale Knockout first round results

Riverside Rumdistillers - First Men of Rome 1 : 4 Scorers: --- ***G Julius Octavianus Augustus (15., 52.), Gaius Julius Caesar (69.), Marcus Licinius Crassus (11.) Booked: --- ***Gnaeus Pompeius Magnus, Marcus Tullius Cicero, Maximus Decimus Meridius Conference opposition was insufficient to trouble the Toga Boys, no matter how drunk they were.

Bananas United - Roxton Rabble 0 : 1 ot. (0 : 0) Managerless Bananas United leave the cup after being defeated by the Rabble of Roxton.

Satanic Wonder Hamsters - Saturday Morning FC 0 : 7 Scorers: --- ***Rick Hunter (23., 31., 42., 48., 82.), She-Ra Princess of Power (5., 52.) Booked: --- ***Pinky, The Tick As expected, Rosedale Open opposition was a bit much for the diggers - better luck next year.

Riverview Rangers - Batt in Blax 1 : 6 Scorers: --- ***Stephen Fleming (6., 38.), Chris Martin (85.), Shane Bond (26.), Nathan Astle (34.), Craig McMillan (81.) Booked: --- ***Daryl Tuffey The conference league seems to be in a rougher spot this year against newly generated teams, as the Rangers were crushed by the Black Caps.

Grorud Grasshuggers - Dangermouse 4 : 3 Scorers: Herb (48., 80.), Felix Leiter (35.), Pit the even younger (19.) *** Dangermouse (5., 52.), Count Duckula (67.) Booked: Felix Leiter ***--- Dangermouse chose to play apprentice and no rough play, and seeing the result, the strategy can be questioned. Nonetheless, the home team wanted to advance, and that was the little extra that mae the wish come true.

Jedi Order - Meadowlands Magpies 3 : 0 Scorers: Quinlan Vos (6., 65.), Bultar Swan (44.) ***--- The Lightside could play backwards and upside down and still beat the weak Magpies.

Stranraer Reserves - Ladish Sausage 3 : 0 Scorers: Heiyu Hoyahamahia (2., 27.), Hassan Al Ergi (21.) ***--- Booked: Bruce Ilosis ***--- With no manager present, Ladish Sausage lost the game in Stranraer's early pressure period, and the Blues simply rode the 3-0 lead for the rest of the match.

Monkey Business - Camarilla Divided 0 : 4 Scorers: --- ***Carla 'Narrow-minded' Walston (8., 65.), Paige 'Heihei' Duff (74.), Ozzy 'Puppet' Mandrill (54.) The most well-mannered match the Scumm Bar has seen, saw the big favourites Camarilla Divided roll over freshmen Monkey Business.

Sleep Wanderers - Pirates Haven 3 : 2 Scorers: Fiddlers Green (19., 85.), Corinthian (82.) ***One Eyed Jack (84.), Bald Benny (14.) Two new teams face off at Stadium of Night, and superior strategy wins out in the end.

Downtown Dopeheads - the Nightfall Dreamers 2 : 0 Being high, the Dopeheads imagined that they won, and there was no manager for the Ambience present to dispute it. the Ancients - Pembroke Pancakes 3 : 0 Scorers: Trilobite (32., 67.), Nanotyrannus (22.) ***--- the Oldtimers had an easy time with the Pancakes, as expected.

Ivywild Incomprehensibles - Gangsters United 1 : 5 Scorers: --- ***Al Capone (4., 84.), John Gotti (49., 70.), Tony Soprano (14.) the Mobsters comfortably advance to the next round.

Old City Centre Ozelots - DC Red Hot and Blues 2 : 0 Booked: --- ***Dave Angelus, Jorge Pasqualle Another conference league team advances, leaving the Riblets to try again next year.

Lords - Fishwick Old Contemptibles 4 : 0 Scorers: Nes Eri (15., 27.), Bejzi Ukurz (17.), Pejt Vrit (47.) ***--- Whoa! Kirkwood club Lords puts in an upset by an impressive 4-0 victory against Lexington competitor Fishwick. Well done!

South Keys Superteddies - Centretown Crazy Chemists 5 : 4 a.p. (0 : 0 ot., 0 : 0) A close conference battle - bye Chemists.

Galaxy Brothers - Sheffield Thursday 0 : 1 Scorers: --- ***Nick Kollias (16.) Penalties: - (1 missed) ***- Booked: --- ***Gregg McQueen, Mike Virgilio A very close match, with Sheffield topping it's team for the cup. In the end, the Owls' rough play was very well placed, and we wave goodbye to the Chefs.

Coventry - Muppets 1 : 3 Scorers: --- ***Beaker (58.), Swedish Chef (70.), Sam the Eagle (66.) Penalties: 1 ***- Booked: --- ***Rizzo Rat, Swedish Chef Lexington top contender Coventry didn't put much feelings into this match, and the Accidents thus got a rather comfortable advancement to the second round. For a price though; Swedish Chef will have to sit next match out.

ANU FC - Underdogs FC 7 : 10 Scorers: Wibbles (7., 87.), Scythe (47.), Ageing (22.), Brettles (36.), Dominator (63.) ***Gunnar Hansen (30., 36., 43., 54., 74.), Liam Svensson (8., 64., 65.), Trond R›nningen (84., 87.) Penalties: 1 ***- Booked: Porpoise ***Rolf Heier Another cup bomb detonates as Underdogs FC bags two digits worth of goals behind ANU FC's goalie! It was a slightly lucky win, but the ball is round, and cup is cup, and all that.

Brazil Star Conquerors - Park Ridge Panthers 2 : 0 Scorers: Rivelino (11.), Ronaldo (1.) ***--- Booked: Cerezo ***--- The 5-stars decides the match with a few rough tackles where needed, and we'll see them again in the second round.

Refridgerator Heaven - Trivial Brief Association 0 : 1 Scorers: --- ***Dissy Video Dreamer (28.) Penalties: - ***- (1 missed) Sent off: No Magnets (75.) ***--- Booked: No Tape, No Vegetarian Food, The Door Shut Properly ***--- the Holy Fridges were actually quite close to detonating another cup bomb, but the Shorties were solid and got in a 1-0 win and advancement.

Toy Town Rovers - Floating Windy City 5 : 4 Scorers: Bluebeard (10., 56.), Robin Hood (2., 6.), Beowulf (77.) ***Paul Bender (22., 74.), Adam Graves (82.), Luke Masochist (17.) Booked: Baby Bear ***Phil Serious The floating Crimson Eagles actually deserved an upset here, being the stronger team, but it's the goals that count, and the Fables got one more. So, FWC, you are the weakest link, goodbye!

Sale Savoyards - FC Gnome 4 : 2 Scorers: Robin (6., 40.), Strephon (17.) ***Alain Socquet (54.) Penalties: 1 ***1 Booked: Sam, Scaphio ***Lend Er, Michel Braillant the Singers unhabitually had to fight for this one, but their success continues. Da Gnomers put up a good resistance, but in the end received too many goals to compete.

Dead Dino Storage - Mishima Zaibatsu 0 : 3 Scorers: --- ***Lei Wulong (60.), Eddy Gordo (54.), Roger the Bush Kangaroo (13.) Booked: --- ***Kazuya Mishima, Roger the Bush Kangaroo Those who heed the call took no chances, resting all apprentices and playing unusually rough - as it turns out, this may not have been very necessary, but after winning Pembroke Pocal, it's something else to defend it in the Rosedale Knockout. Better luck next year, DDS!

Sportf†narna United - the Bluebonnet Plague 3 : 0 Scorers: Ranma Saotome (20.), Pig-Tailed Girl (81.), Ryoga Hibiki (34.) ***--- Booked: Nabiki Tendo ***--- As Bluebonnet's manager predicted, there was little they could put up against the Dust Stompers. Aiming to repeat reaching the semifinal this year?

Byward Bobcats - the Blitzball Team 1 : 4 Scorers: --- ***Lulu (41., 63.), Yuna (8.), Rikku (80.) The Blitzballers comfortably advances against conference opposition.

Odd Athletics - Pocket Valley Philosophers 0 : 5 Scorers: --- ***Heidegger (60., 66.), Wittgenstein (5.), I. Kant (74.), Nietzsche (15.) Penalties: - (1 missed) ***- Sent off: Odd Golf Truck (80.) ***Nietzsche (83.) Booked: --- ***Beckenbauer, Heidegger, Schlegel As the Berkeley teams clash, we saw wild battles, rough tacles, and a little football in between - the latter primarily contributed by the Drunken Thinkers. Good luck in the next round!

Grunts United - Car Park Rangers 5 : 0 Scorers: Mean Middlefielder (52., 57., 82.), Murky Musksmell (21.) ***--- Penalties: 1 ***- Booked: Dorky Doorstopper, Fean Forwarder ***Bob the Tremere Car Park Rangers continue to struggle, that's 0-24 in three matches? Grunts United advances.

Call of Cthulhu - Desassossego Blues 3 : 0 Scorers: Yog-Sothoth (75.), Nyarlathotep (8.), Shoggoth (55.) ***--- Booked: --- ***Ricardo Reis, Thomas Crosse the Lurking Fear kept cool, and won safely against the Blues.

Shock & Awe - Miners Quarters Minnows 0 : 1 The Elvii despairs as their Chargers fall victim to the conference Minnows.

New Bremen Cyberdruids - Grovetown Geeks 1 : 0 Scorers: Tony Stark (77.) ***--- the Cyberdruids were having a hard time converting their chances, but newly purchased Tony Stark saved the day near the end.

Marble Hill Marauders - Lower Tadfield Apocalypse 0 : 5 Scorers: --- ***Newton Pulsifer (28., 90.), Anthony J. Crowley (13.), Dr. Raven Sable (52.), Brian (12.) Last year's finalists have no problems qualifying against conference opposition.

World Ambassadors - Newport Nocturnals 1 : 3 Scorers: Ian Bond (36.) ***--- Penalties: - ***- (1 missed) Booked: Christian Wyatt ***--- The Stabbers also fall victim to the conference curse, losing 1-3 in what was a very even match.

14. GM's ramble

Hello everyone, and welcome to the first match weekend of season 2! Let me take this opportunity to welcome Phil Sellars to the game – he has taken over the spare team, Refridgerator Heaven.

Inge Simonsen has left us before his first round, so that means Bananas United is free for takeover. If I don't hear from anyone by about 24 hours before the deadline, I'll submit orders for this team myself until someone is willing to take it over. Next to go is Shock & Awe, unless I hear from Bill White first.

Submissions were as follows: Rosedale Open: 12 out of 12: 100% Lexington League: 10 out of 12: 83% Berkeley Conference: 9 out of 12: 75% Kirkwood Showdown: 11 out of 12: 92% Total: 42 out of 48: 88%

Lets see those numbers up, folks!

In Rosedale Open, Lower Tadfield Apocalypse and the Ancients top with 4 points, with Call of Cthulhu and Camarilla Divided following with 3 points. At the bottom we find Saturday Morning FC, Grorud Grasshuggers and Car Park Rangers without points.

Coventry and Sale Savoyards run away at the top of Lexington League, with 4 points each. Most teams have 2 points, whereas New Bremen Cyberdruids and Fishwick Old Contemptibles are trailing slightly without points.

The leader of Berkeley Conference is Dead Dino Storage with 4 points, and First Men of Rome follow closest with 3 points. Here too, most teams have two points, with FC Gnome with one point and the Nightfall Dreamers without points make the bottom two.

Kirkwood Showdown is lead by Underdogs FC and Batt in Blax with 4 points apiece, with DC Red Hot and Blues taking 3rd with 3 points. At the other end, we find Refridgerator Heaven, Brazil Star Conquerors and World Ambassadors with 1 point each, and Galaxy Brothers still without points.

The luckiest team of the league system so far is Coventry, followed by Sale Savoyards and DC Red Hot and Blues. The unluckiest team is Muppets, followed by Floating Windy City and New Bremen Cyberdruids.

The home advantage is still 6 VP. Match 3 and 4 are played next round.

The deadline for issue 3 is Friday, May 14, at 2130 CET.

Your teams will be sent out soon.

15. Address list