A Comeback to Remember Youth Baseball Teaches Kids About Winning and Losing

A Comeback to Remember Youth baseball teaches kids about winning and losing. One team, and one special season, taught a coach about something else: the importance of staying in the game. by flinder boyd

was a beautiful day for baseball. On a late afternoon last “Why don’t you coach kids or spring at Friendship Park in South Ogden, Utah, the red something?” she asked. Breitweiser IT infield clay crunched with each step, and the sun spar- liked the idea. He had managed kled off the nearby Wasatch Mountains. J.D.’s youth baseball team years But despite the ideal weather, coach Curtis Breitweiser earlier and hoped he could recreate felt nervous—“half scared to death”—as he waited for the South Ogden happier times. A’s to arrive for their first practice. He hadn’t coached in more than a de- As practice got underway, some cade, and with no direct connection to any of the 9- and 10-year-old play- kids were wearing basketball ers, he wondered whether they would like him or respond to his teaching. shoes. Others wore soccer shorts. Around town, the former insurance salesman, then 57, was known for One was using a plastic toy glove. his endearing smile and ever-ready nuggets of advice, but the past year At one point, Breitweiser told the had been the hardest of his life. In April 2017, his only son, J.D., took his team to meet at home plate. Con- own life at the age of 23. fused, a few players sprinted to Breitweiser, his wife, Caron, and the couple’s three daughters tried to the dugout. In one drill, the boys rally together, but the only time he felt any solace was when he was alone formed two lines, 5 feet away from on his Harley-Davidson, or climbing majestic Ben Lomond Peak. When he a partner, for some toss and catch, decided to retire early, Caron suggested he take up a hobby. but even that was an adventure.

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F1_Baseball_DE.indd 57 4/4/19 5:17 PM “It was horrible,” Breitweiser efore the first game, when a teacher placed them side says. “They just had no concept.” B against the team by side in junior high, and they’d The week before, the team had from South Weber, been inseparable ever since. They essentially been picked at random Breitweiser lined up now worked as electricians in the by Breitweiser at a league-wide the players to stretch in unison. same office at Hill Air Force Base. draft. Few of the players knew one They were decked out in matching The season before, Coffey and another, and no one knew him. gray pants and green South Ogden Muchmore had coached a team Breitweiser ended practice early A’s tops. While other teams in the that included their sons, but, Cof- and gathered the team in a circle. league were happy for their players fey says, “It didn’t go well. We don’t “Listen, all I want is for you to have to have one weekly practice, the know anything about baseball.” fun and hustle. Do we know what A’s had gone through an intensive Over time, the team improved hustle means?” he asked. There baseball boot camp, practicing ev- significantly. On the last day of was a smatter of yeses and an “I ery other day for three weeks. boot camp, Breitweiser lined up think so.” “Hustle means do your Luke, an undersized left fielder the players in the same formation best.” The kids put their hands to- who wore glasses that were slightly as the first practice—two rows of gether in the middle of the circle. too large for his face, learned not kids facing one another—and had One … two … three … “Play hard to sprint in the opposite direction them toss the ball back-and-forth. and hustle!” they screamed. of the ball. Corbin, the first base- No one dropped it. Breitweiser saw Of course, no one knew it man, stopped ducking every time a glimmer of hope. then—not the parents, not the a pitch was thrown. Gradually, the Against South Weber, he chose players, and certainly not Breit- A’s worked up to the basics. his shortest player, Brandon, as his weiser—but they were about to For help, Breitweiser had starting pitcher. Painfully quiet, he embark on something special. taken on two parents as assis- had the best arm on the team, but For now, however, they were just tant coaches—Jordan Coffey, Breitweiser had also noticed that a band of baseball misfits in need tall and spindly, with a quiet de- he threw a bit like his own son. of some structure, and a lost mid- meanor, and his best friend, Jason That seemed like a good omen. Af- dle-aged man in need of some Muchmore, stout, fast-talking, and ter three batters, though, Brandon direction. covered in tattoos. The pair met had walked the bases loaded. PARK. FLY. SAVE.

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F1_Baseball_DE.indd 58 4/4/19 5:17 PM “Time!” Breitweiser yelled to the umpire and walked to the mound. “Are you OK?” he asked his pitcher. Brandon looked at his father, Does Your Hand Shake Jorge Bocaranda, who—along with his wife, Yamileth—was si ing in a When You… lawn chair down the right eld foul Drink a glass of water? Write a note? Dial a phone number? line, far away from the rest of the If so, you may have a condition known as essential tremor. parents. Bocaranda had grown up Our team at the Swedish Radiosurgery Center has successfully treated around the game in Venezuela and hundreds of patients over the past five years — using Gamma Knife, perhaps knew more about baseball a nonsurgical, FDA-approved approach to treat essential tremor. than anyone else at the eld that day, but he didn’t like to be near adults he didn’t know. Twenty- ve years earlier, he immigrated to Utah a er coming for a short visit. He was so struck by the state’s beauty that he never le . Then, a few years later, while DRAWING SAMPLE BEFORE TREATMENT DRAWING SAMPLE AFTER TREATMENT out one evening in Salt Lake City, Learn more about essential tremor and find out he was assaulted. The experience if Gamma Knife treatment is right for you. scarred him. He moved his family 1-206-320-7187 Swedish.org/essentialtremor to South Ogden, an economically Seattle, Washington, USA diverse area, but in their part of town, they were the only Latino household. As Brandon grew, he in- herited his father’s love of baseball, but also his resilience. Breitweiser kicked the dirt o the rubber, and Brandon retook the mound. Then he red a strike, and then another, and another. He Your struck out three straight ba ers. Weekend In the bo om half of the inning, the A’s knocked the ball all Your over the eld and eventually won, Way –. The players did a victory lap around the bases, culminating with a team slide at home plate. Your next getaway to Washington, DC begins The next game, the A’s won a in Montgomery County, Maryland. Explore the thriller, –, followed by a – shut- great outdoors, soak up history and unwind out. By the fourth game, cousins at local breweries. Experience your weekend, and grandparents of the players your way - with classic Maryland flavor! were in the bleachers, Co ey says. Breitweiser’s sisters and parents, too. Breitweiser estimates the A’s would have as many as people coming to games. “Winning was so awesome,” he says. The assistant coaches became more involved. Bocaranda inched closer and closer to the dugout un- Request a Travel Guide & til Breitweiser handed him a jersey Enter to Win a Weekend Getaway and made him an uno cial third assistant coach. At work, Muchmore and Co ey VisitMontgomery.com/Weekend

F1_Baseball_DE.indd 59 4/4/19 5:17 PM couldn’t stop talking about base- to the cemetery where his son was so cool,” Breitweiser recalls. ball. They’d debate the team’s ideal was buried. He’d sit next to J.D.’s “J.D. was like my best friend.” pitching matchups, or who should tombstone and relive the team’s When J.D. died, Breitweiser’s bat leadoff. If they were confused highlights. Brandon was turning life went into a cosmic tailspin, about any aspects of the game, like into the best pitcher in the league; but coaching the A’s had given how to hit a cut-off man, they’d Luke had taken a ball to the face him some semblance of order. He pull up how-to baseball videos at in the outfield, leaving him with a built a routine around preparing their desk. Their favorite pastime, shiner, but he wasn’t running away. for games, drilling the players, and however, was guessing the back- Breitweiser and J.D. had always texting the parents recaps after ev- story of Breitweiser, a man who been close. One summer before ery practice. For a while, this fragil- had seemingly appeared out of no- J.D. (short for James Don) started ity held. Then, one evening, he got where. By now, they trusted him, high school, Breitweiser took him an unexpected text from Coffey. but they were still curious about on a road trip from Utah to Florida In large part, Coffey had taken a their initial meeting. Breitweiser and back. Breitweiser was work- coaching role to be more involved told them he decided to coach being on visiting every ballpark in in his son’s life in a way he wished cause he had some free time and the major leagues, and they went his own dad had been. Coffey’s then cryptically said he would “ex- to seven stadiums during the trip. father had recently been treated plain the rest later.” They stayed in dusty motels, and for colon cancer, and the two had “Think he won the lottery?” J.D. confided to his father that he been working on their relationship. Muchmore asked Coffey. “Is dreamed of being a sports agent Halfway through the season, Cof- that why he has so much time one day. The last ballpark they fey’s father died of a heart attack. to coach?” visited was Busch Stadium in St. In the text to Breitweiser, Louis, and the two were randomly Coffey briefly mentioned what s the season pro- selected as “the fans of the game.” happened and said he wouldn’t A gressed, the A’s Their picture was put up on the be at practice. A few days later, remained unde- scoreboard, and they were taken Breitweiser surprised Coffey by feated. After each down to the VIP boxes where they attending the viewing. With- victory, Breitweiser would drive were treated like celebrities. “It out mentioning his own son,

F1_Baseball_DE.inddLive Nation PitBull.indd 60 1 3/27/194/4/19 5:188:23 PMAM Breitweiser put his arm around Coffey and told him, “I know what you’re going through.” “He helped me get through it,” Coffey says. “He was the person that needed to be there.” Shortly after the funeral, the A’s played the team from Washington Terrace. It was a wild game. The A’s were up a run in the final inning when Washington Terrace’s sec- ond baseman overthrew first base. Corbin sprinted halfway to home plate, and then stopped when the opposing team’s manager ran onto the field, screaming at the umpire that the runner shouldn’t be allowed to advance. Breitweiser, usually mild-mannered, argued his case, but Corbin wasn’t allowed to score. The game eventually ended in a 9–9 tie. Before, every victory had felt to Breitweiser like a sign from above, a reconnection with J.D. But a tie felt empty, and all he could think about was the burden of his own secret. “I needed to tell the team and the parents why I was there.”

he final game T of the season was against the Riverdale Bees, the only other undefeated team in the league. The A’s would have to win to finish in first place. Before that game, Breit weiser organized a team celebra- tion at a local park for families and friends. He grilled hot dogs, and near the end of the afternoon, he handed out awards and thanked the families and the kids for their dedication throughout the season. “The first practice, your kids couldn’t hit, couldn’t run. And look at them now,” Breitweiser said jok- ingly. Then he took a long pause. He wanted to tell them every- thing about J.D.—a sports aficio- nado who worked at Foot Locker and collected LeBron James signa- ture sneakers, a senior at Weber State University studying econom- ics, a loving son with a girlfriend he adored. But it was all too painful. Perhaps there was even a part of

Live Nation PitBull.indd 1 3/27/19 8:23 AM F2_Baseball_DE.indd 61 Live Nation.indd 1 3/19/194/10/19 1:343:34 PM him that wanted to tell them the walked over to Breitweiser and bent down to meet him at eye things he couldn’t bear to think gave him a hug. “He’s really spe- level. “I never ask my players for about: A week before J.D. was to cial,” Bocaranda says. anything but to show up and try graduate college, he killed himself The entire team dedicated the their best,” Breitweiser told him. in the Breitweisers’ home. There final game, played back at Friend- “But, Daniel, I’m asking you to hit a was no note. Maybe the only clue, ship Park, to J.D. However, when home run.” which Breitweiser later discovered, the game started, it was as if all of Daniel nodded. He swung hard was that J.D. was short a few cred- the team’s magic had evaporated. and missed the first two pitches. its to graduate. Whether or not Brandon’s pitching was erratic, and The A’s were down to their last this explained something, the fam- the team struggled to make con- strike. The pitch was delivered … ily didn’t know. But the hardest tact. Every game in the league had And, of course, you can guess what part, Breitweiser says, is that J.D. a one-hour time limit, and the A’s happened next. Daniel cracked the never told him what was really go- found themselves down two runs, ball over the first baseman’s head, ing on. “In the end, I realized I was with a half inning to bat before past the right fielder, and into just his dad.” time expired. the corner. The two base runners In front of the families, he After a strikeout and a hit-by- scored, and then Daniel crossed turned his hat inside out and pitch, Brandon drew a walk. An- the plate. An inside-the-park home showed them the scrawled ini- other strikeout followed. With the run. Final: A’s 7, Bees 6. tials—J.D. “The real reason I did A’s season down to its final out, Maybe it was just a kids’ game this was for the son that I lost,” he Daniel, the team’s jokester but its in a league that didn’t officially said, “to fill a void in my heart.” best athlete, stepped to the plate. name a champion, but if you After Breitweiser spoke, the During the A’s boot camp, he hit looked around the field that day, parents came up and hugged the ball farther and ran faster than you would have seen pure elation— him, and the kids did what 9- and his teammates. However, once the parents jumped up and down; kids 10-year-olds do. They ran over and season began, Daniel struggled. He ran around the bases and slid into doused him with soda as if he’d would try too hard at the plate and home together; Coffey and Boca- won a championship. Even Bo- became increasingly frustrated. randa, who had found healing in caranda, so sensitive to contact, Before the first pitch, Breitweiser the comforts of the team, joined

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Trinity University.indd 1 3/28/19 10:42 AM the dogpile; and then there was for the school play, and his dad was Europe. At times, he thought about Breitweiser. For 10 weeks, he had becoming more open. Bocaranda emailing the parents and check- taken on 11 sons and an extended signed up to house two Venezue- ing in, but then he’d get cold feet. family he never knew he needed. lan minor leaguers playing for the “What was I going to say?” he says. He stood back against the dugout local Class A team, the Ogden Rap- It wasn’t until he ran into the railing with a satisfied grin. tors. “I really liked it,” he says. Bocarandas at a Raptors game He then handed the players For others, the season left a that he realized how much he medals he’d had specially made, in- void. Coffey and Muchmore had no missed the team. The memories scribed with the team’s name. The more games to distract them, and and the feelings flooded back. This players put their hands together Coffey says, “I kind of went into a spring, when the new season rolled and, one last time, screamed, “Play funk.” The kids felt it, too. One day, around, Breitweiser called Coffey, hard and hustle!” Daniel, the home run hero, heard Muchmore, and Bocaranda, and The kids ate their snacks and, that Breitweiser might be visiting they signed up to coach together one by one, headed to the parking a home nearby. Hoping to catch in the 11- and 12-year-old divi- lot with their parents. Breitweiser a glimpse of him, Daniel grabbed sion. Because of league rules, they lingered. When the last car had fi- his bike and snuck outside, but he wouldn’t have the same team, but nally pulled away, he soaked in the never saw his coach. that was OK. For Breitweiser, the moment alone. “He’s my family,” Daniel says. “I magical season had given him a life “And just like that,” he says, “it wanted to see him.” he thought he’d never have again. was over.” Breitweiser, meanwhile, looked “I’ve tried not to let J.D.’s death for more ways to connect with oth- define me,” he says. “That team he next day, the ers. He signed up to chair a com- could never replace him, but they T adults went to work mittee at his alma mater, and he taught me it’s OK to smile. It’s OK and the kids went to agreed to serve on the board of a to be happy.” school. The triumphs nonprofit, MECKA, that aims to and disappointments of everyday help kids overcome struggles that Flinder Boyd is a freelance writer in life followed. Luke was more con- can lead to suicide. He and his Los Angeles. Email him at flinder. fident in class. Brandon tried out wife even bought tickets to go to [email protected].

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