18 issue

January 1132 1999

KEEP THE CAT FREE EST. 1949

The Students' Newspaper at Imperial College Union to Expand into East Beit

The Union looks set to dramatically Ihe additional basement space increse its facilities in August next year, By David Roberts means that the Union can now go with expansion into both the East and ahead with a comprehensive redevel West Wings of Beit Quad now opment plan, aimed lo provide more approved by College. adequate provision for club meetings Although the Beit basements were and better student services. Conse theoretically gauranteed for student quently, the East Wing basement will use two years ago, controversy become home to a new Union Job errupted in November when initial Shop, alongside the Advice Centre and plans for the Beit Hall redevelopment College Chaplaincy, plus RAG and CAG suggested that the net gain for the offices. On the other side of the Quad, Union would be negligible [Felix] 127). a new Media Centre will house Felix, IC However, the last meeting of the devel Radio and STOIC (student TV), plus prac opment committee appears to have tice rooms for College bands, and the overturned this decision, favouring Science Fiction Society library. The final increased social and recreational space, act of the renovation will see the pre in line with the reccomendations of sent Beit Hall Bar converted into a ne\¥ the 1996 Committee on Social & Recre home for the Islamic Prayer Room. ational Space. Photo: Jonas The East Wing basement as It presently stands - not a pretty site. Although at present only in the According to senior sources, credit planning stage, work on the Quad is for this dramatic planning turnaround committee of the benefits (both social son is then believed to have taken up due to begin this July, with the new hall rests with ICU Manager Mandy Hur- and financial) of the change in outlook, the Union's cause at higher levels, and Union facilities opening in summer ford. Having persuaded the planning committee chair Professor Alan Swan- resulting in this week's key decision. 2000.

Perfect Power Plan Set in Motion Inside..m

Few people can have missed the bright to be economic. Letters 4 red temporary boilerhouse in Dalby By Gareth Morgan The project is due to be completed Court, but why is it there? It is the inter over the summer, and will be handed Editorial 5 mediate stage in a project to modernise will cost around eight million pounds, it over to College in November. The boiler the college's energy supply, which took will save over £800 000 a year. There is house in Dalby Court will be removed in CartOOn - Justin Trudlng 5 a significant step towards completion in also the promising ppossibility of selling September, so that a new car park can be the week before term, when two new surplus electricity to the Grid if this proves built underneath it. Columns 6 Combined Heating and Power (CHP) engines were installed below the Elec Science - Ecstasy 7 trical Engineering building.

For the past thirty-seven years, the FiCtiOn - Toys in the Attic 8 College has been heated by an oil-fired boiler plant, supplemented with hot Clubscene 10 water from the Natural History Museum. The current boilers have reached the RAG pullout 11 end of their working life and are now being replaced. The new system will Music 16 generate 7.75MW of electricity, enough to meet most of the College's needs, as Film - Win Cinema Tickets 18 well as providing enough steam to heat the campus. Electricity from the National Games 20 Grid will also be used for peak demand and overnight. The new gas fired Sport 22 engines are 20m long and weigh forty tonnes each; they are expected to Crossword 24

reduce the College's C02 output by 7500

tonnes per annum. Although the project Photo: LES The forty tonne engines are lowered Into position News 18 January 1999 Meningitis Strikes Again KEEP THE CAT EREE

The lethal meningitis bacteria has once panicking". again afflicted campus, hospitalising a By Andrew Ofori A "well attended" hall meeting was issue 1132 first year chemist. called, where Dr Weinreb (chief doctor The student returned home having sion to light. Within 48 hours the stu at the IC Health Centre) addressed the 18 January 1999 celebrated New Year's Lve in lizard dent was placed on the wards having Tizard community. She reassured them Hall, with friends. Later the following made a significant recovery and is now that due to the amount of time that Lditor: Ld Sexton week he called his girlfriend, also an expected to return to full health. has passed "the extra risk is now Assistant Editor & films: David Roberts IC student, and complained of ill Dr John Hassard, Tizard Hall war absolutely minuscule" but emphasised News Editor: Andrew Oforl health. When he described his symp den and the Department of Public that the "season for meningococcal Music Editors: Dennis Patrickson toms, she suggested he seek imme Health have located those who came infection is still with us till the Spring & Jason Ramanathan diate medical attention. As a result he into contact with the individual and and I urge everyone to be vigilent. Arts Editor: Helena Cocheme was admitted to the Intensive Care antibiotics have been administered. The important thing to know is that the Games Editor: Gary Smith Unit of the Royal Surrey Hospital on Dr Hassard viewed the student's recov disease can develop very rapidly, Clubscene: Giles Morrison Thursday 7 January exhibiting a num ery as "very good news" and felt it sometimes within a couple of hours. cS, Joel Lewis ber of the danger signs: a severe could be attributed to "decisive action, Early symptoms may be similar to those Sports Editor: Gus Paul headache, disorientation and an aver- recognising the symptoms and not you get with a flu or hangover". Photographic Editor: William Lorcnz

Winter Wonderland Library Theft: Arrest

included a snow board machine, woman who had been working on the By Sanjay Sikdar though judging by people's efforts it By Ed Sexton third floor of the library. The police was quite easy to see why there is still were called to the scene and arrested On 18 December, despite the capital's a dearth of winter Olympians from this A handbag stolen from the central library the man who had been in possession of numerous attractions, Christmas rev country. Ihe chill out room was ele last Monday (11 January), was later recov the bag. Barry Woodgate, Chief Security ellers flocked to the Union in a record gantly adorned with various drapes ered by security. The incident resulted Officer for IC School of Medicine, attendance for the newly expanded depicting scenes from the chronicles of in one arrest being made by the police. reminded all members of the College venue. Narnia. The Tarot card reader for the Suspicions were raised at around not to leave their belongings unat dB's played evening resided 4.30pm when two men, who were not tended when on College property at host to two live there and was members of the College, were noticed any campus. bands, the first continually wandering around the library. Security Referring to the incident in the JCR of which was engaged by were called to investigate and stopped at the end of last term [Felix 1131 ], Mr Specimen A. Imperial stu the suspects for questioning. One of Woodgate stated that police were still Initially disen dents keen to the suspects was found to be in pos investigating the case. As before, any chanted with confirm their session of a lady's handbag, which he one with any information should contact the infamous lucrative careers. had hidden underneath his jumper. The the police officers listed in last week's IC apathy, they The casino bag was later found to belong to a article. succeeded in in the Union filling the floor gym was a major with their big attraction as beat and high were the tat- Medical RAG octane compo tooists. The only sitions, this problem was place this evening (Charing Cross, 7pm), was followed that nobody was By David Roberts deisigned to conclusively prove which by the Repli prepared to campus is best. Tuesday night sees a cants and true have one done Last Sunday saw the beginning of the soiree (Mary's, 6pm) and a revue & hyp to their name in an unusual first ever IC School of Medicine Union notist (Charing Cross, 7pm), whilst they produced location despite Rag Week, with a Rag Dash to Edin Wednesday sees an 'Invasion of Lon thought pro the sincere burgh. don' in the early hours, followed in the voking inter requests of The week combines events which evening by a Battle of the Bands Bop pretations of Felix's ace pho traditionally formed part of either St (Charing Cross, 7:30pm). I inally, Thurs various famous tographer. The Mary's or Charing Cross RAG, and day sees a horde of medics descend on covers. The gambling pro should hopefully raise tens of thou an unsuspecting London for the Circle band's rendi duced many a sands of pounds for charity. A variety of Line Pub Crawl finishing up at a post tion of one cel- drunken loser, fundraising events will take place crawl bop (Mary's, 11 pm). e b r a t e d Photo: Brett You' regret It In the morning especially on the throughout the week, culminating in a For more information about the Nirvana song Russian roulette. ball at the Shepherds Bush Empire on week contact the ICSMSU RAG Chair inflamed the passions of those in the Some went for the all or nothing prin f riday where the Medical School Presi Mike Smith on 0181 846 7048, or drop mosh pit and several Union stewards ciple while one inebriated gambler dent, Wade Gayed, will be guest DJ. into the RAG office at Charing Cross. were called upon to mitigate the skir claimed he could predict on which half Tickets can be purchased for £15 from More information on ICU RAG mishes. the wheel the ball would fall by a care the ICSMSU office on each site. Week (which kicks off next Saturday) Other noteworthy distractions ful application of the Doppler effect. A series of RAG games will take can be found on pages 11-14.

Felix, Beit Quad, Prince Consort Road, London SW7 2BB Internal tel: 58072 Internal fax: 48072 External tel & fax: 0171 594 8072 URL: www.su.ic.ac.uk/l ellx E-mail: [email protected] Printed at MCPLitho limited. Units B2 & B3, Hatton Square. 16 - 16a Baldwins Gardens, london FC1N 7RJ Telix is a registered newspaper: ISSN 1040- 0711 felix is produced for and on behalf of Imperial College Union Publication Board. Copyright © Felix 1998. Photographic copyrights remain with photographers. 18 January 1999 News 3 In brief... Grandmaster To

Wrong Number ground. The top spots were unsur prisingly filled by Cambridge and Challenge IC Students A misprint has led to "every man and Oxford where about four-fifths of the his dog wanting to play rugby" with intake come from the middle or upper- It's not every day that you get to tackle in good company, you'll have some fun one unfortunate London resident. Due classes. The champion of the working a Grandmaster over the chessboard... and find out just how good a Grand to her number mistakenly appearing in class was the University of Central Lan On your own? No way! But with a few master really is. the BUSA list of contact details for IC cashire with under one in three of their friends to keep you company? Ilmm, Anyone at the College can take up School of Medicine, one individuals intake coming from a maybe... the challenge. You don't have to be a home has been plagued with calls professional/managerial socio-eco On Monday 25 January you will have Grandmaster yourself, you don't have enquiring about sporting fixtures. nomic background. Imperial was par that chance. Dr Jonathan Mestcl from to be a member of the chess club, you Could all concerned please note the ticularly outstanding when it came to the Maths Department, one of the top only need to know how to play. contact for ICSM Is: 0171 262 3025. its ethnic intake, however, scoring one Grandmasters in the country, will be the event will start at 6.30pm and fin of the highest percentages in the coun challenged by up to 40 opponents simul ish by 10pm. The location will be try. taneously. announced later, there is no charge for Cannabis Clinic He's good... but he's not invincible. entering. Latecomers can be accom With 40 games to concentrate on at the modated, and spectators arc welcome. Clinical trials of cannabis have been Nightline same time, he's got a tough job on his To reserve a place in the line-up on Mon announced by the British Pharmaceu hands. You may just get lucky. You day 25 January, or to find out more about tical society. Doctors in Hammersmith London nightlinc are currently looking only need to draw and you'll be a hero the Chess Club, contact Barry Gale (Email and Plymouth hospitals may start work for caring, friendly volunteers. They are (or heroine). Even if you lose you'll be [email protected], tel. 0181 316 4132). in the next few months. Ninehunderd a confidential listening organisation patients, suffering from multiple scle- supplying practical information for Lon rocis or post-operative pain, will be don students. The student volunteers given either herbal cannabis or purified would need to give up three nights a cannabinoids such as THC. If the trials term. are successful, cannabis could be made Volunteers gain valuable experi available on prescription within three ence and the obvious satisfaction from years, according to The Guardian. knowing they arc helping others Meanwhile, the first harvest of legal Nightline also offers the opportunity to cannabis plants is being dried at a top- become more involved with every secret location in the south of Eng aspect of the organisation, from mar land. keting to training. The helpline also has an active social dimension and gives volunteers the chance to meet stu Posh Parentage dents from all over London. There is an introductory talk at 7pm The Holland Club, a members only club for IC staff and some postgraduates (e.g. Imperial College has been placed sixth on Tuesday 9 February at ULU, room Felix columnist Simon Baker), Is situated underneath the west end of the Sherfield in the national posh stakes with around 2C. Volunteers are available to answer Building. The bar received a brief refurbishment over the holidays - but don't worry, 70% of its students having what is questions on the helpline: 0171 631 all you finance conscious club treasurers, the work was paid for by profits made in deemed to be a middle class back 0101. the Club and not out of college funds. Photo: Jonas ICU Council The next meeting will CUT & BLOW DRY BY OUR TOP STYLISTS

take place at 6:30 on &20 LAJDIES Monday 25 January In &17 MEN Normal Price Jt.35 the Clore Lecture Theatre HAIRSALON ACCESS VISA MASTERCARD CASH CHEQUES (in the Huxley Building).

'Still the best student offer!* Items on the agenda

include the future of the 15a Harrington Road

CCUs and the need for a South Kensington

sabbatical president for the London SW7 3ES

(I Minute walk from Medical School Union. South Kensington Tube) The meeting is open to all,

and all interested parties Telephone 0171 823 8968

are advised to attend. letters & Small Ads 18 January 1999

LT Delays? Surely not... delay the process to get your student sexism endemic in wider society, but line that worked for 2 weeks in 7. It is for photocard. I mean if they really wanted this is something we at IC have no sway you to make it a worthwhile experience, not them. Dear Felix, to help students, it should be possible to over, for the time being at least. Admit get your student photocard in the same ting more suitably skilled women to IC is Happy travelling, I'm having a lot of trouble in getting my way you get a normal photocard: in two the first step to changing this, and the student Photocard from the London minutes at every underground desk I college's efforts under the WISE scheme Underground. I sent an application form I would like to know if I'm the only are laudable. While I agree entirely with Jonathan Hastings Pet. Eng. PG on the 6th of October with the £1 coin, one to have troubles in getting the stu Ms Humphrey that positive discrimina photograph and all the other stuff they dent photocard. SO IF YOU'RE HAVING / tion/affirmative action (e.g. Insisting on require. But I didn't receive anything. So HAVE HAD PROBLEMS TO GET YOUR STU admitting 50% women) is a flawed phi at the beginning of December I phoned DENT PHOTOCARD, PLEASE E-MAIL ME. losophy likely to exacerbate the prob them to ask what was happening with lems, I do not share her pessimism Campaign for Clayponds my application. They told me they had Capucine pertaining to the wider scientific world. not received it. That is quite hard to (e.mail: c.watine ©ic.ac.uk) A new generation of dynamic women Dear Mr Sexton, believe that this kind of envelope (I mean scientists is needed to sweep away the big, yellow and printed) can get lost... I know that this is not an uncommon residual bigots and their outdated prej I am a pstgraduate student at Imperial, and I am writing to you about the lack of But anyway I sent a second applica problem. David Hellard, ICU President, udices, and IC graduates should be at the a common room at Clayponds. tion form on the 3 rd of December with Is currently looking Into the matter (see fore in this. the £1 coin and all the other stuff. Today Presidential Talk-Back this Issue), so hope I awas a little disappointed when I (12th of January) I phoned them. I mean, fully there will soon be a resolution. In Yours sincerely, first arrived in London at the lack of a bar I'm becoming a bit nervous about getting the mean time, I suggest anyone who / commonm room at Clayponds, where this student photocard... And guess what has experienced similar problems emails Simon Lewis it would be possible to relax and meet they've told me I This time they received Mr Hellard ([email protected]) - Ed (ICU Equal Opportunities Officer) other students. After making a few my application form but they refused it. enquiries, I was told by several sources As I'm a PhD student, I sent them a pho that permission for such facilities had tocopy of my registration form as an ben granted by the relevant College Internal postgraduate student of the Uni Optimism for Equal Ops Brightening Prospects? authorities, and that the money to build versity of London stating clearly in capi them had also been sanctioned in spirit. tal letters that I'm a full-time student. Dear Sir, Dear Felix, There are many students at Clay This is a very official form on an Imper ponds who arrive knowing no-one else ial College letterhead and the signature Your editorial on "Equal Ops - the New I have a few quick comments on Claire in England, let alone London, and given of the Registry. However they told me Sexism?" uses your belief that women Bayntun's article (advert?), 'Brightening the stressful nature of this city, it would that they accept only the registration "think differently than men" as a basis to Prospects' in issue 1131, about travelling be worth the £15k or £20k it would cost cover note (you know, the red sheet question whether women are as equally abroad. to build such a small facility, bringing with the college stamp you get when you suited to science as men. Your state I taught in a summer camp for chil Clayponds in line with every other Impe register). I think it is really unfair as it is ments seem worded to avoid excessive dren near Moscow in 1995, and can rial College hall. written in the application form that they offence, but nevertheless they are a crass whole-heartedly recommend the expe I have spoken to many of my fellow need 'a clear photocopy of a document generalisation. It is a question for the psy rience. I came back a much changed residents, and they all agree that a com to confirm your full-time status' and this chologists, and frankly rather irrelevant in person, and not only in that I had mon room would improve their quality of is exactly what I sent them I Furthermore this instance. Every individual studying at become a Vodka connoisseur and had life tremendously. a friend of mine sent exactly the same IC was accepted to do so on the basis of lost a lot of weight! registration form and got her student A-Level grades/interviews which were However, my word of warning is Thanks for your time, photocard in two weeks I supposed to indicate their suitability for that at that time, 'Teaching Abroad' had The worst thing in this entire story is science. At no point should their gender quite a bad reputation for not providing S Virmani I wasted a lot of money buying a weekly have been an issue. much support after you got to the devel I myself have visited Clayponds, and travelcard every week as I was expecting It is easy to explain away the gender oping country of your choice. I will not wholeheartedly agree that It needs a to receive my student photocard fairly disparity at IC with such arguments as go into further details as they are only common room. As far as I can see, quickly. And as you know, or should yours, but these can often be a veil for vague recollections of second-hand infor there Is no good reason why It should know, buying weekly travelcard is more "the old sexism", the kind which kept mation that is 4 years old. And besides, n't be built right now. Can anyone In col expensive than buying monthly travel- eminently capable women out of many I was left pretty much on my own by the lege enlighten me? - Ed card. professions for centuries. Both you and company I went with. I think it is the way I begin to believe that the London Susannah Humfrey (in her piece on of things when you are 3 hours journey Underground is doing whatever it can to women in science) are right to blame the away from the nearest city, with a phone Deadline for letters is

Room to Rent in 3 12noon Wednesday. Bedroom Flat: £70 pw. Sinfonia 21 Resident at IC presents a concert Letters may be edited

Spacious room to let (female only) in Friday 29 January 1999, 7.30pm In the Great Hall for length, but will not 3-bedroom flat with 2 other female clinical students Conductor Stefan Asbury Soprano Rosemary Hardy be altered in any other Lovely flat, washing machine, TV, video, 5 mlns from Britten - Prelude and Fugue Julian Anderson - Poetry Nearing Silence way. Letters need not Charing Cross Hospital Jonathan Harvey - From Silence Shostakovich - Chamber Symphony Charles Ives-Three Places in New England (arr. Barshai) be signed, but a swipe £70 pw + bills. Booking and information line open from 29th December 0171 594 9359 card must be shown Please call £10/ (concessions £4) 0171 385 1472 Imperial College Student Price £3 (Student number must be supplied) when submitting or 0956 228 303 anonymous letters. for more info. 18 January 1999 Editorial & Cartoon 5

block on a Biology essay? Hopefully. ended, so I'll avoid the dreaded 'col Ecstasy is the Unknown After all, surely creative ills arc as lect all the editors from the last fifty important as physical ones... Anyway, years and dump them in a bar' party. Without any conscious effort by me. it this leads me nicely on to I was thinking, however, of printing seems as if drugs are back in the lime bits and pieces from those early years light in Felix. Ihc article on ecstasy as 1999 progresses. Which is where [page 7] is, in my opinion, balanced Creative Arts you come in. If anyone has been at IC and fair. One argument that has for, how shall I put it, a substantial The Week Ahead always irritated me in drugs debates is There aren't enough arty people at IC. amount of time, or has relations who the old 'if you enjoy taking drugs you No surprise there, I hear you say. We were here in the decade after the war, Monday can't be enjoying everyday life / must all have an artistic side, though, and let me know. I'm also missing some be depressed / are probably mentally most of us express it through one years of Felix from the sixties and sev Games Meeting 12.30pm unsound' etc etc. Rhubarb and fiddle medium or another. Most of us prob enties, if anyone has an attic full of For PC, PSX & N64 reviewers. sticks, as my father would say. bestasy ably also think we are 'bad' at art back copies. Film Meeting 1pm is a great drug -1 doubt whether any (whatever that means). The story in For all you cinema-going types. one who has taken it in amicable sur this week's issue [page 81 is a wel News Meeting 1.30pm roundings could claim otherwise. Its come (and very good) change from Write Travel (with no links) recreational value is undeniable. Ihc the nitty rationality of science. Impe Tuesday question is how high is the price for rial does actually have an arts maga Those lovely (?!) people who make the that rushing euphoria? And the zine; Phoenix. It is always after Rough Guide series of books have News Meeting 12pm answer is that, with a drug only contributions, be they prose, poetry, offered me a deal. I print regular blurb decades old, we have no way of yet drawings or whatever. Phoenix is now about their books, and they'll give a To review progress and discuss new news knowing its true dangers, or benefits. an annual magazine, reduced from Rough Guide to someone writing a Whatever your stance on the legal the popularity it enjoyed under its travel feature for Felix. So if you know Wednesday isation of cannabis as a recreational founder, II G Wells, by the birth of a bit about some far flung corner of Late News Meeting 2pm drug, I hope that most people applaud Felix in 1949... this world, and fancy getting yourself the trials shortly to be undertaken at a guide book on it, let me know. Friday Plymouth and Hammersmith hospitals Hopefully we'll be starting in a week or [page 31. I'm sure that MS sufferers all Fifty Years Ago two. Perhaps a similar scheme involv Arts Meeting 12pm over Britain will, anyway. It's interest ing free bitter would tempt some For theatre and museum goers ing to speculate how far the term ...which means, of course, that Felix is sports teams to write match reports Photography & News Meeting 1,20pm 'medicinal use' could stretch. half a century old this year. Fortu next week...? For Al I photographers and news writers Headaches? Probably. Mild depres itously for me Felix's birthday is next -Ed MuslcMeetlng 1.30pm sion? Possibly. How about writer's Autumn, after my term of office has I or ALL single and album reviewers 6 Columns 18 January 1999

ell, here we are again, happy as With that milestone out the way, you can also made no secret of their desire to use tinker with the CCUs, a topic which has can be. Unless, of course, you now focus your efforts on serving con the single currency as a tool to achieve given gainful employment to sabbati W are one of the unfortunates sistently good beer, a slightly bigger tax 'harmonisation.' For the uninitiated, cals since the dawn of time. Whenever who have exams to do as we speak, for undertaking, I'll wager. this is an ingenious plan that enables this issue comes up, it inevitably stirs which you have my sympathy. I hope The Euro, for the benefit of those liv Germany to sustain its crippling rates of great passions in all of about half a that you all had a good Christmas, afford ing on Mars of late, has now arrived, with corporate taxation by imposing an dozen people across the campus. Even ing you the opportunity to recharge the more of a whimper than a bang. Despite equally damaging regime on the rest of by Imperial standards, the supreme indif batteries prior to getting annihilated on the ludicrous pronouncements by vari Europe. Many European nations have ference that greets any such efforts is New Year's Eve. For my part, as is now tra ous European politicians, who pro no problem with this, because they incredible, and very telling. The recent ditional, I ventured to a little shindig at claimed it a success after two hours already have an equally outmoded and history of the CCUs has not been a happy Alexandra Palace, boppin' the night away trading, it is unhelpful tax one, dominated by cockups and people with all you youngsters (though I was sur far too early system, but elected on a democratic mandate of a prised and disappointed to see virtually to tell if it will Simon Baker Britain would couple of percent of College members, nobody else from IC there). Damn fine be successful. pay an incred- who are incapable of running a bath, let evening, and well worth the charge of One early ; ibly high price alone the RCSU, C&GU and so forth. The interfering with the Royal Mail that was benefit has problem stems from the fact that the nearly brought against a good friend of been to clar people running these august bodies mine, who became locked in a mail ify the future seem to see their organisations as rivals room in pursuit of tickets for said event. direction of grave sover- to ICU. Consequently, they establish vast It's a long story, the details of which can the EU. Any mr ^tattk eignty issues numbers of posts for the most trivial be recounted if you cross my palm with one who *y- ^ I,usee h\ sue h tasks, with which they need not con bitter. claimed that \,«a nine I ho cern themselves. CCUs seek to dupli So far, as is to be expected, it's been talk of feder argument as cate all aspects of the Union, so we a bit quiet at Imperial. It is reassuring to alism was i if^j. t0 whether have welfare officers, academic affairs see that Estates' passion for signs is not mere anti- Britain should officers etc etc. Such over-representa diminished as we approach the millen Europe pro si;;r-..:) to-;-o tion merely generates more paperwork nium. The big silver installation outside paganda - %^ | Euro has and committee meetings with precious the BMS is certainly a departure from the should have moved on. II little tangible benefit for students. The blue ones, both in colour and legibility; been suitably is not so clubs issue raised by the ICU President is I was beginning to think that my eyes humbled by much an issue less controversial, though on balance were going, but since I only had them I ranco-Ger- of success or they would lose none of their identity checked a fortnight ago, it must the grey man state failure of the and it would purely make things simpler on grey colour combination. Still, we ments on the currency, but to administer. As it is, the only activities can't have the medics slumming it with Euro being what would that the CCUs need worry about arc the blue efforts. Perhaps it will be easier the first step Voice of Reason follow from cnts, principally in Freshers' week, their to read when it has been gilded and to full integra membership, publications, however execrable they encrusted with diamonds. The Union tion. This, of course, was painfully obvi namely an inexorable drift toward fed may be, and alumni relations. Leaner seems to have achieved a bit of a victory ous to many people, who were eralism. In the words of the great philoso organisations, stripped of the legions of in its battle for a new licence, giving the particularly troubled by the political pher, is that what you want, 'cos that's self-opinionated bores so lacking in building a sensible fire limit. Hopefully dimension that the French were so keen what'll 'appen. organisational skills that they couldn't this will mean an end to the paranoid to promote, with talk of creating a cur The shifting sands of sovereignty even find gainful employ within ICU, officiousness displayed by some of the rency designed to insulate Europe from (first issue of the year, and he's started would over time become more popular stewards, whose uncharacteristic behav the menace of globalisation. It is almost alliterating) will be an issue this year and successful, rather than the pitiful iour was so over the top as to be laugh touching that grown-up people still hold within the loose confederation of tribes shadows of their former selves that they able. Congratulations to all concerned. such ridiculous views. The Germans have that is Imperial. Moves are again afoot to are at the moment. Presidential Talk-Back

Since the beginning of term, the Union ing reasons.' The Next year there is as PhD and clinical medicine students are has been inundated with complaints most obvious one David Hellard, ICU President doubt as to whether still studying. Hopefully these will be about the London Transport scheme was that there the same mailing resolved by the end of the year within (thank you Michelle for giving half of your could be a dodgy house will be used; the University of London Union. time to them.) Applications have been postman taking all let's just hope not. Until then if you have a complaint lost, rejected, stolen and as a result stu of the envelopes to This does still not the best thing to do is to write to Den dents are having to part with budgeted make a bit of cash account for the time nis Torycliff, Chief Executive, London money. Having complained several times before they reach periods from send Transport, 55 Broadway London SW1 verbally, in letters and through the ULU LT. The solution to ing a letter off to the HOBD and copy the letter to Richard chain to the company with no joy, I this is to send your rejection letter or Parry, Market Planning if you're extra decided to try and track down the source applications in a the high number of keen. of their problems. white envelope. I 'inadequate' appli If you did not received a card within There are very few lines of com also found out that cations. the usual 28 days and have lost money plaint for students; the telephone service they accept There are still because of this, or if you have bought is ineffective; you can find out whether cheques, just make some issues that weekly Travel cards instead of a monthly or not your application has been them out to Lon need to be settled one in the expectation that your card processed or rejected, but complaints don Transport. Lf with London Trans would come within the next few weeks are never logged or recorded and the also blamed the port, the most obvi and have consequently lost money phrase 'brick wall' springs to mind. I mail house; the forms are processed at ous being access to the scheme for all please email me with the amount and spoke for quite a long time to one of the LT, checking whether they are valid or not students (not just under 25s) and an reasons at [email protected]. If we operators, making them explain the and then the information is sent onto the increase in the period that the card is receive enough letters I've got a stunt up shambles and of course there were 'vary mailing house who send out the cards. usable to all twelve months of the year, my sleeve that might have some effect. 18 January 1999 Science Feature 7

Agony or Ecstasy? Sarah Rutt's personal perspective on the love drug

...so here I am, right at the front of the stage in the centre of the dancefloor, right in the middle of this breakdown meltdown which is going on forever this is never gonna end and the lights are in my eyes or perhaps my eyes are closed PUT YOUR HANDS IN THb AIR and learn how to fly COML ON NOW GLI YOUR HANDS IN THb AIR we're almost there it's nearly time nearly time and woah there I just lost my head somewhere can't feel my feet but everybody's shouting hey just look around and see FIVE the smiles tOUR the lights THREE the choonz TWO the crowd ONE here we go are you ready for this because it's NINETEEN NINETY NIIIIIIINE...... and then, somewhere in the midst of the hugs and the grins and the 'happy new year's that break down finally comes to an end, the beat kicks back in, and there'll be no sitting still for at least two hours. You know the feeling: the music rips right through you, you're getting mile-long tracers off your hands, and, apart from a spot of jawache thanks to that gum you can't stop chewing, you've never felt so fuckin' amazing - mate - in your life. You know damn well you'll feel like shit tomorrow, but that doesn't mat ter right now, does it? After all, the comedown is a 3,4 Methylene-dloxy-N-methylamphetamlne - do you really want this swimming around Inside your body? fair price for such a blinding night out, and that brain- cell meltdown will only last a day. Won't it? n't even on anything right then, he just took a few already. fet me tell you about Adam, a salesman. I met pills most weekends, and had been doing so for the Okay, so ecstasy is dangerous. But, on the him in the street: he came rushing up to me one past year. Or three. He couldn't really remember. other hand, I'm not suggesting that we can all live summer afternoon, big grin and wide eyes, and Two 'I'm Adam's later I couldn't take any more, and up to the government's ideal of supreme will power, asked straight out if I knew where he could get Es, walked off. Had I seen him again a minute after and resist the stuff altogether. I'm not advocating dope, even a wrap of speed. No, I said, I quit the wards I doubt he would'vc remembered ever meet- the use of drugs here, but people w/7/takc them, and stuff a while back. His face fell. Sort of. The grin they have a right to know where they stand. Ihc odd was still there, as If painted on, and his eyes were pill every few months probably (and note I say prob still wide, blank, staring. He started to talk triple ably) won't do you much harm - provided you don't speed, in the way that pilled-up people do, and I just mix it with other drugs, especially alcohol, and watch assumed he was off his face. More Es? He sounded your water intake (a pint an hour is about right). But, to me like he'd taken a month's worth already. if you're taking ecstasy most weekends, or if you feel He asked me my name, and told me his. Then that you need a pill to enjoy yourself, then you're whether I knew of any decent clubs locally: he was doing yourself some serious damage. Get yourself new to the area. Two minutes later he was asking sorted, mate, and get yourself off it. If you don't, my name again, and again in another twenty sec the chances are that you'll become another Adam, onds, and again a minute after that. "I'm Adam, another vegetable whose thoughts run in ever- how're ya doin'?" occurred at least five times in ten decreasing circles. I don't want that. You don't want minutes. It turned out (several times) that he was- that. As the saying goes, choose life. ing me. If that's not brain damage, I don't know what is. And if you want 'hard' evidence, you can have that, too; results of recent studies on ecstasy users strongly suggest that prolonged use can result in long-term memory loss, depression, and paranoia. That's not just forgetfulncss and mopey feelings on comedown-day: brain damage is for life. Adam may think he's enjoying himself, but I suspect that within another year or so, he'll be incapable of doing any thing more complex than the washing up. The upside is that he'll wash all the plates at least twice, because he can't remember that he's done them

If you would like advice, information or counselling to do with drugs, call the National Drugs

Helpline on 0800 77 66 00. The service is free, confidential, and Is operated 24 hours a day. 8 Fiction 18 January 1999

Stella did not want to be here, that washed a hundred dead camels than was all that she was thinking about. coming here today, am I right?"

She did not want to be here, sitting "Near enough," on this lumpy sofa, drinking this "OK, but would you have also tea, trying to make conversation with Joys given them mouth-to-mouth?" these impossible people. She would "Look, I'm sorry Henry, but I'm

have paid a lot of money to have not in the mood for this."

been somewhere else, anywhere else. "Alright, Alright," and they lay for

She was at her mother-in-law's, a while in silence. who had issued the invitation almost After a while Henry spoke again,

five months previously. Stella had "I think it's time I let you into some

taken an instant dislike to the flat, secrets," Stella stirred on his chest. and ten minutes later she was posi in, the "Areyou in the mood for some really tively repulsed by it. However, what juicy secrets?" was worse were the people who were "Go on then."

in it. They were a few selected friends "Maybe 1 should have told you

of Henry's mother: seven ancient before we came, it would have cer

and shrivelled women, whose hus tainly cheered you up. Where shall

bands had without exception expired we start?...urn...OK, you remember many years previously. These women Attic that woman who you were sitting (Henry's mother had to be regret beside last time, the one with the

tably included) were so grossly con really curly died hair, yes? Her name

ceited and contemptuous that it was James?" ing emanating from it, "We call it the is Mrs. Crow and she has a rather

verging on the comical. "That's right." baby phone. There's another like it by unfortunate health problem. A prob

Stella, however, was finding it "Mrs. May told me that he was James's bed. It transmits even the lem which none of the others know

everything else but comical at this born in March." Stella was not so slightest sound to this one. Listen, about, bar my mother that is. You

moment. She was sitting on the edge forthcoming with a response. She you can hear him snoring..." Stella see, she has a quite large and very

of the sofa and was struggling was slightly uneasy as to where this held it out for the woman to exam painful cyst on her...urn...well, to put

through the last ruins of a conver was leading. ine. For one moment, it seemed it crudely, on her arse. And, er... to

sation with the person on her right. "Yes..." she said again. The old there was a gleam of curiosity in the be accurate, it's in her arse."

It was clear that the dialogue had woman paused, as if she was trying old lady's eyes and her withered "Henry, why on earth would I

died some time ago yet she was stub to achieve some effect. hand was already hovering to reach want to know that?"

bornly trying to carry it on. Part of "Don'tyou think June or there for it. Then she started and her hand "Listen, it gets a lot worse.

the problem was the fact that her after would have been more appro dropped back into her lap like a Because of this,..this...THING she

conversational partner looked and priate?" dead fish. She gave a kind of snort can't wipe herself like normal people

smelt like she had been living in a Stella had to think for a moment ing sound. after having a...well, you know what.

bottle of gin for the past ten years. and then realised that the woman "How can you entrust the safety Anyway, so instead of wiping she

With a sudden compulsion, Stella was referring to the fact that James of your child to an electric box like washes herself and at home she has

abruptly stopped the monologue had been born less than nine months that?" She grated. a bidet installed for this purpose.

and turned to her left to find the per after her wedding. For a moment Stella regarded her adversary However, when she's at other places

son sitting there staring at her. anger threatened to crush her com with a mixture of disbelief and there sometimes aren't bidets

Stella's left neighbour had a very posure and she struggled to remain almost pity. Then the sight of her around, so...."

interesting mouth: it looked like it civilised. husband rising from his chair across "I really don't like the sound of

had been yanked shut with a length "We are all entitled to our opin the room caught her eye. Henry met this."

of string, and twitched and pro ions," she said curtly. her gaze, winked, and slunk though "...So she has to use the sink."

truded from the sunken face as if "Where is the child now?" the the door. "Excuse me," Stella snapped Henry paused and savoured the

someone was still pulling the string. woman croaked. and followed him with great relief. moment.

The old woman's eyes were fixed "He's asleep next door." She found him sprawled on the He knew very well that the flat in

on Stella's and it actually looked like "Alone?" double bed in the adjacent room, which they were in - his mother's

she was going to say something. Fire "Yes, alone." There was an uneasy beside the cot where James was still flat - did not contain a bidet. He

the cannons, thought Stella, one of silence between them, which the old snoring away through his tiny pink waited for a comment from Stella

these crones is actually going to start woman seemed to regard as a kind nose. With a resigned sigh she lay but as there was none he continued.

a conversation with me for once. of victory. Stella decided to continue. beside him and rested her head on "One day Mrs. Crow went to the loo

"Tell me," the woman wheezed, "But I can hear if he so much as his chest, which tremored with silent here and forgot to lock the bath

"you were married in December, is squeaks, look." She briefly squirmed chuckles. room door. My mother entered the

that correct?" on the sofa and extracted a radio-like "Don't say whatyou're about to bathroom unawares and caught her

Stella nodded hesitantly. "Yes..." object from her jeans pocket. There say," he whispered. "You were about in flagrante delicto, contorted over

"And you have a child named was a soft but clearly audible rasp to say that you would rather have the sink - you can imagine the scene. 18 January 1999 Fiction

Unfortunately though, she managed "It's so awful. He was having a "Now I'll tell you about the last wants to sell the whole lot and make to blackmail my mother into silence shower when he must have stepped secret, and this time nobody next a few profitable investments. Now because my mother - as you know on a bar of soap, or something. He door - not even the person it con our Mrs. Wilson was very ill at one

- is as incontinent as a sieve. By slipped over and cracked his head on cerns - knows about it. It concerns stage and everyone - including her coincidence Mrs. Crow was the only the hot water tap. One hour later his Mrs. Wilson, she's the one that you son - assumed that it was the end of one from their group to know this mother found water dripping onto were talking to before you left. Now the milk run for her. He and his and therefore she threatened to the kitchen table, because her son she is a particularly unpleasant char brokers began to make elaborate

make it public if my mother spilled was lying facedown in the plughole. acter but, as fate will have it, is also plans for the money but were

the beans about her. It's quite sad He had drowned and she had a ner fabulously wealthy. She owns a large thwarted when she made a com

really." vous breakdown immediately after house in Stissex which contains plete recovery. That was seven years

Both lay in silence for a while, wards. 1 don't think she ever quite many valuable items of furniture, ago. He is, understandably 1 sup but Henry noted with satisfaction recovered completely." Henry especially a very important collection pose, quite bitter - and she knows it. that Stella was smiling slightly. paused, almost respectfully, before of paintings. She has a son who is the One year ago, purely out of spite she

"It's totally true, you know," he carrying on. "As far as 1 know, only single heir to this considerable estate gave away an extremely precious said. "Now I'll tell you about Mrs. three people alive today know about and who also happens to be very painting from her collection to some

Chambers. You remember her, she's this incident." good friends with John from last obscure gallery. Her son found out

the one that told you all about her Again they lay in silence for week, remember? That's how I know and hit the roof but there was noth son. You will have found nothing awhile, before Henry started up all this. Anyway, this son of hers is ing he could do about it of course.

unusual about that, in fact it's an again. not really into his antiques and just Then, however, he contrived a bril

interesting and very touching story. liant plan: he correctly assumed that

But had you had another conversa his mother would make similar gifts

tion with her you'll have found that to various other causes so he com she would have said all the same missioned an artist to make copies of

things, because her son is all she all the valuable paintings in the col talks about. She is infatuated with lection, which was basically all of her son, her son's legacy is the rea them. Then he carried out several son for her life. clandestine missions into his

"Now you'll think that even mothers house, at night of course, though that might be slightly eccen and replaced the original canvases tric, you can't hold it against her, see with the copies, whilst leaving the

ing what this son of hers did. Well, frames. His mother is, 1 believe, a lit I'm telling you that everything that Caspar tle fuzzy in the optical deparnnentso she told you - everything that she the whole thing worked liked a tells anyone in fact - is made up, a dream. I've been informed that he's figment of her imagination." now stripping the house of tapesn-ies

Stella coughed. "Henry, how can and ceramics." you be so sure of this?" Stella burst into her bright laugh

"I'm telling you, it's the truth ter and Henry too was infected. They and not even my mother knows von kissed briefly and then for longer, about this. I heard from a very reli and then for longer still. But Henry able source, but that's another story. suddenly started.

Anyway, the only true fact in her "What's the matter?" story is that her son was in the 24th "Stella, whilst we were in there bomber squadron from 1941 you had the baby-phone out." His onwards. After that the fiction voice was entirely different now, begins. He never saved two wounded f rede deadpan and ominous, "Where is it comrades by single handedly flying now?" their plane back with a bullet in his "Why, it's here in my pocket". lung. Neither did he shoot down 12 What followed was a brief rustle of

German fighters. And least of all, he bedclothes and garments and then a was never posthumously awarded deep silence. Stella was the first to the DFC. He did die during the war, A story speak. but not by crashing his aircraft "It must have fallen to the floor"

through an enemy bomber forma A slight tremor was unmistakably

tion. He died whilst he was on leave, present in her voice. Slowly she at home, with his mother, Mrs, raised herself and peered over the Chambers." for Dan edge of the bed. "Oh my God, what happened?" 10 Clubbing 18 January 1999

Singles and Albums Nymph @ Mass

SINGLE OF THE WEEK The Family feat. Alexander Hope St. Matthew's Church, Brixton, London, lot of beautiful people around - and Tyrese "Love my brother, love my sister" SW2 - currently monthly residency, the they're there by the truck loads. "Nobody Else" (Cleveland City) second Saturday of every month, This is highly sexed club (Arista) £10/12/14, 10pm - 6am, capacity - bing. But don't you go thinking that this Bloody excellent tune - was nearly sin 1000. Dress code - just make an effort. is a meat market or a pulling joint. Now strictly speaking this should be in gle of the week! It's a single you could Nymph is still very much about the "tha Bomb" as it is an R&B tune, but it dancg to. all tight long - great vocals What a venue!!! Mass, as music and the vibe that's in the club - does come along with li iads of remixes, although I am not sun if the title insin the name suggests, is an old converted some of the crowd just take this to its one of which is from top UK garage uates INK i I'-Murh the rest of the church. But this isn't the C of E's typi natural progression before they head boys London Connegffbn so we've so: , doest It may not get released, cal old stomping ground. Insti iu ;t»: yif.liome. Ihe Nymph sound leaves included it here. Its an UpU mpo funk but it \ou like vour house then buy building has an II nothing to be desired and tins is whal song and I'll admit thatifelWiijjtg this. Asidets standard I use bass lino flanked by huge cojuphs, making % gets thlfnight to its euphoric levels. bloody well. And he also makes ads for B side i Bard hitting bass line. resemble a mini version of the Ihe main loom is smooth, lunky, Coca Cola and models for Tomm\ Hn * * * * Parthenon. I loin the outsideThis plai o gioovy, Boogie-nights, disco-house - figer. There are various other n looks like it should have an fcleasjblv the pjfle to strut your funky stuff In. available, but the one for the clubs Bectrotheque , high ceiling, but to get to the Mob nu And the second loom gives a nice London Connection. Out at the begin* "I M r\ones a Pinner" have to go up an endlj|p!piral stair- contHt. Progressive beats and nu- ning of February, with an album sMortk (Fresh) JL. ( aso this is a tiuK weird CM>CMCIn o breakllrom (he likes of Cream s Steve after. in itself '< os Ihoie an no windows Lawter will have your's and everybody The title's a giveaway! It's a dance ver along its whole length. Butane eThat I'lsf! I1||ds in the air and a big cheesy sion of Hot Chocolate's "Everyone's a Is over with the fun reallyJje.oii is 11 onn slar-Ped across your face. This is Bedlam Winner" and what's more they like it. venue opens out into two large io< 'ins hard and happy music. But it never 'Da Force" Norman Cook and Tong and Jules from at either end of the church. The main falls down on the side of cheese - it's (Edel) Radio 1 love it - so no doubt everybody room has dance floors on two levels, always leftfield enough to retain a else will. Personally I think that dance with some of the crowd dancing above sense of street cred. A great single which contains a sample versions of classics are crap but that's the sunken main dancefloor. The DJ is So there you have Nymph. A stunner from the disco classic "Can you feel the just me. Will it be big? Course it will, and raised above the crowd and is silhou of a night at one of the most memo force?". But unlike many recent artists if you want a dance version of "Every etted against some stained glass win rable venues in the capital - sounds and producers, he hasn't screwed up one's a Winner" then errr buy this. dows. The second room is more good to me. I'll see you there next the original - just added a more funky conventional, but the stage at the front month. beat. Theres's a range of mixes so this gives any posers amongst your group Make the pilgrimage should keep you dancing for a while. Released 22/02/99 the chance to do their thing whilst looking down at us normal people ALBUM OF THE WEEK below. Released 18/01/99 Mad Doctor X So the venue is one of the "FjMgc with the Greys" funkiest I've been to in London, but Arthur Baker what about the people? They are the Roobarb "Breakers Revenge" Mad Doctor X is an alias of supreme ones that make nights actually worth

: (Freskanova) iunte Wt/af:d;: Jay-Rock from the going to, especially again and again. Froestyllrs (best band of 1998 at the Well the Nymph folk, from the DJs right Very funky tune on a rathf-r hny Muzlk Awards) It's a mixture of funk- down to all the dancefloor punters, awaited project and w$if; worth it. soul and hip-In >p ti s a I > I rat k CD are just as stunning as the venue. It's There's three mixes altogcTblpIhe B- album and rwh song is very different rare to go to big London venues these side includes the Plump ; 'j-, ren 'i.\ ul IK jromlthe rest, giving value for money. days that are really friendly, but that's isn't up to much and the Cut ta Ro, *** * how it is at Nymph. And the people remix which isn't too bad. The best mix here arc really, really, really friendly to is the A side Freestylers Remix, wjaich All reviews by Gurm each other. There's probably a lot of adds a great bass line to a very funky pre and post clubbing rooting involved choon. with an outing to Nymph, and people don't even stop in the club. With a title like Nymph you'd expect there to be a Released 25/1/99

111;

12 Rag Special 18 January 1999 18 January 1999 Rag Special 13

Who? What? Wherel When? How much?

Date: Saturday 23rd January Date: Thursday 28th January Event: SNKPJ , Event: Hypnotist

That old favourite the naked run from Harrods back to the Union. Have you got what it takes? ie Complete Former IC student turned professional hypnotist and magician Martin Taylor returns to the Union to do a insanity, and the ability to run and hold your bits at the same time! Oh and I'm afraid you have to be male. special show for Rag. Js hypnotism really in the realms of astrology and crop circles, or should IC be run

But it makes I d spectating for us few IC females! ning courses in it? Well maybe courses would be taking it a bit far, but Martin helps to explain how it's all

Runners and sponsors needed. a state of mind. A big hit last year, Martin does his show with the help of the audience, so if you've ever

CONTACT: [email protected] wondered what it's like to be hypnotised, come along and find out! He has promised not to do anything

completely evil, but I'm sure it will still prove to be an entertaining evening! A bargain night for just £3!

Date: Monday ist February Advance tickets are available from the Union Office. You must be over 18, and a member of ICU to attend.

Event: C&G Slave Auction 8pm, dB's Tickets £3 s

Your chance to buy and make use of a number of crazy volunteers. This is the annual event where you Date: Saturday 30th January get to get your own back on a number of people, including ICU President Dave I lellard and DP(C&S) Chris Event: The Field Cup Ince. If you fancy having a slave for a day, why not come along, or if you are interested in being a slave, > get in touch. If you don't think you can afford one on your own, grab some mates and you can share!! Permits allowing this could prove to be a huge; collecting pub crawl! In teams of four, you have to follow 12.30 Union Concert Hall CONTACT: [email protected] the clues to the next pub, once you get there answer questions to win points. And we all know what points prunken Swine '99 Date: Tuesday 26th January mean! There are prizes in a number of categories (including most money collected, best team name/mas Event: Variety Show cot and best fancy dress), although only C&G teams can go home with the cup. If you are interested in tak ing part grab three friends and get hold of an entry form (from C&G Union, or email the contact below). If Come and see people showing off in Ihe name of charity. So far we'\e got a stand up comedian, a jazz

you don't think taking part is your scene, how about spending a day sitting in a pub with some mates? Sounds band and the all new Spice Girls! Think you could do better than the rest? Acts still needed!

like a normal Saturday? Well, why not help raise money at the same, time? For details about being a mar- 8pm, dB's only £1 CONTACT: [email protected]

S shal just get in touch with the contact! A ,V f mk \ HI I IMP i. Date: Wednesday 27th January 11.45am, Belt Quad. CONTACT: [email protected] Event: Manic Street Collection y PINT GLASSES FOR SALE We have managed to get permission to collect within the bounds of Westminster, so let's go! This could Having a party? Don't want to get your glasses smashed? Why not buy some prove to be a huge collection, so why not join us? We intend to raid Oxford Street and the nearby area, of ours! Old Beer Fest pint glasses for sale! One day these could be collector's but if anyone wants to go anywhere else, let me know! If your club or society fancies molesting unsus items! Who knows they might make it to the Antiques Roadshow! We need to pecting members of the public all in the name of charity now's your chance! Drop us a line at [email protected] get rid of them, so all donations gratefully accepted. and all can be arranged. If you just want to come along and help shake a bucket. Just email us at [email protected] and we can arrange collection!

12.30, Belt Quad CONTACT: [email protected] 14 Rag Special 18 January 1999 And the point is.... Rag Chair Sarah Coburn explains what Raising & Giving is all about and gives a rundown on just who will be benefiting from the money raised this year.

After a somewhat hectic couple of months as Rag chair, and with the help of some brilliant people, we've finally managed to come up with SheLterjk something vaguely resembling a Rag Week! All I'm going to say about

it is please give us your support as it's all for very good causes. If you A well known charity who help homeless people and those who are don't like what we're doing then don'1 just sit there moaning about how in bad housing situations. The money helps rehouse people or help crap we are - DO SOMETHING! We always welcome new Ideas and we them to find somewhere to live. definitely don't bite!

Ihe fundraising doesn't just start and end with Rag Week. So far we have raised over £1500 for various charities including the Poppy f Imperial Cancer Appeal, Alone in London, and our own nominated charities. Although m£i Research Fund I'm really pleased that we raised this money in one term, compared to Another big charity whose work is well known. The money helps to the likes of Nottingham, Bristol the IC Medics and others this is provide for research into all forms of cancer, and hopefully one day a absolutely pants! Why? They are all raising thousands rather than hun cure will be found. dreds of pounds. I his is where you come in; we need your help, so

that we can begin to make our Rag as successful as some of these other universities. After all we're up there academically, so why aren't we TRINITY HOSPICE up there in other ways!

I'd like to say thanks to loads of people for helping to get Rag week A hospice in Clapham, which provides residential care and support for off the ground and for keeping me on the ground! So here goes! I elix those terminally ill and their families. Ihe money goes towards the care

guys: Ed Sexton and Dave Roberts. Union people: Mandy, Michelle, of the ill, and to help provide support services for their families.

Neil, Jane, and Mark Home. And also: Dramsoc, Gareth Morgan,

Jenny Ldwards, I arhad Cooper, Martin Lord, Phil Mitchell and Pete I lan-

nam for giving me somewhere to live! AIDS EDUCATIOE N & ARCH TRUST

RAG MAG NOW ON SALE Another smaller charity, who help to fund ground-breaking medical < Available for a mere 70p from the research into AIDS and HIV. They also focus on educating people about Union Office and at all Rag events the disease, and how it can be prevented.

For more information on anything to do with Rag or Rag Week, email: [email protected] or [email protected], or ring the office on ext 58099. *'CU Your Union . IMI'I 1(1 \l

BLACK STAR LINER FEAR OF POP Bengali Bantam Youth Experience! Volume 1

you can easily suss out from the album's ormally, spoken-word 'con It's a cliche to cite Beck, but the BLACK STAR LINER * title. Black Star Liner are one of the mul cept' albums invoke images of experimentation and diversity of the titude of bands in the scene labelled by N crusty Beat poets smoking music, which in truth dominates the spo some as "The Asian Underground". I'm Gauloises in dingy fulham cafes - the ken word aspects, are at Beck-like stan not sure if this term is used by music preserve of musical psuedo-intellectu- dards. Should you buy it? I'm not sure. industry bods to group together bands als like Neil Hammon. So a spoken It's hard to say whether I like this album with an Asian sound to their style or if it word album from the lead singer of because it's good or because it's not as means that a member is a person of chirpy, Prozac-fuelled Ben folds Live bad as it could have been. Try before you Asian origin? sounds about as likely as Marilyn buy, I think. CI Well, BSf fit into both categories Manson covering B'witched. Oliver H with an array of sitars, tablas and more However, a spoken word album is conventional samplers providing a more precisely what Mr Fold has produced earching the wonderful expanse Western dance beat. BSL are not new to and it is nowhere near as honey-fied as known as the world wide web I the so called "Asian Underground" and you might think. Lor starters, the back S was struggling to find a picture have built up a devoted fan base. The ground music displays instrumentation for the above space which I obviously use of synth violins is abundant and very far more varied and interesting than the never found and had to settle for the effective, although it can get a little poppy but ultimately bland Ben folds album cover instead. During my wan repetitive at times. The album's opener five's efforts. dering through cyberspace I came Slta D sets the mood, dark and oppres Mr Fold takes us back to Starsky and across many Black Star Liners, but not sive but always provides you with a hint Hutch with his 'waka waka' song Kops, the band. Apparently it was the name of lightness to relieve the claustrophobia. and over to Japan for the most bizarre of Marcus Garvey's dream of a pan- Superfly and Blndl has leanings towards song. In Love - William Shatner talks African shipping line. Perhaps not very the majority of Massive Attack's Karma- about his love for a girl, his acting capa interesting, but is this how Black Star coma. What I would like to know is bilities used to the fullest. It's almost as Liner the band ended naming them whether BSL listeners actually know what moving as when he says 'Fire!' in a Star selves? Something for you to think a bindi is?! Chilled out is blatantly the Trek film. Ben folds five eventually show about don't spend too long on it, it approach here, so if you like your sounds their face in Avery M. Powers Memorial could be a health risk. mellow give this a try. H Bcltaway. There's no keyboard but the Anyway, on to the album proper. As Jason barbershop quartet are certainly there. singles

Llama Farmers - Big Wheels vides us here with the first of his own material. Released Craving controversy by putting a photograph of an next month. Hazel is a comic mixture of the Freestylers' NT - Responsibilities eight-year-old girl smoking on their record sleeve, Llama style and Big Beat's, erm, big beats. LdJ A gravelly textured voice crying out soulfulness, accom Farmers would do better to let their music take the front panied by a looping bass riff is what you get from NT. seat. A constant fight between R.L.M. style semi- The voice is a little too similar to one of Gomez's two acoustics and the powerful clatter of drums and guitars, THE ESSENTIAL CHOON singers, and the cynics amongst you may say that this Big Wheels is a more than satisfying song to take us into is only getting released due to the inexplicable success the new year. It is well deserving of its more than gen Grand Drive - Wrong Notes of the Gomez boys. erous airplay. This one's definitely a bit of a grower. The vocals arc almost identical to those of the dread-locked lead Naem - Parrot Fever Eve6 - Leech singer of the long absent, grungey and at the same time I'm sorry, but this is just plain and simply boring. It is Just as we can not have the hedonism of New Year's mellow, Soul Asylum. The song uses a hammond and repetitive and probably could have been made by any Lve without the annoyance of Angus Deayton on our pleasant acoustic guitars that lean towards Spanish amateur working away at home with their own eight TV screens, so we can not have a thriving British indie strumming to create a dreamy number. track recording gizmo. Allegedly Skint records arc scene without the occasional disturbance of a band that meant to be the cream of the crop when it comes to uses volume as a substitute for talent. Eve6 are such a 'Big Beat' releases. They'd better think again if they want band. 3 Colours Red - Beautiful Day to maintain this exalted position. This is a far cry from the punky freshness of previous Umajets - When I Wake Up singles like Nuclear Holiday. Instead 3 Colours Red The Yo-yos - You Cot Me Out of My Mind In one respect, Umajets are a lot like the Lighthouse Visions of Status Quo leap out of the recesses of my Family in that they both seem to release a lot of singles mind where they had been long buried since the vio that sound the same. However, Umajets provide us not lent torture endured at the time of Rocking All Over The with cheesy MOR pop-soul, but a relaxed concoction World. This song scared the pants off me we don't of Beatlesy melodies and West Coast harmonies. Not want a Status Quo clone, please please please! that bad, actually. Audioweb - Test The Theory Monster Magnet - Powertrlp I his is yet another single to get lifted from Fireworks City, The title track from both Kerrang's and Metal Hammer's and Audioweb come at you head on with an energy album of the year, Powertrip is also featured in Kurt Rus fuelled track. It's not as stylish as Policeman Skank so I sell's new film, Soldiers. So, we kind of expect it to be wouldn't recommend going out to buy this unless you quite good. Actually it's pants, a hilarious combination want the two extra remixes, with one from the excel of heaw metal and lets-do-the-hand-Jive. have chosen a melancholic anthemic string laden ditty lent I reestylers. Get the album instead if you like this to possibly break into the mainstream? I'm afraid it's not and the other previous singles. EJ Loop Da Loop - Hazel going to happen this time lads. Jason The remix master Loop Da Loop (a.k.a. Nick Dresti) pro 18 January 1999 17

Ttia Bomb!

That Was The Year That Was .1998

So, another year has gone by. As ever, loads has hap Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill. No news of any Fugee pro (Uptown Baby). Elsewhere, Cam'ron represented for pened in the 9-8, problem now is where to even ject in the works but things ain't looking so bad on the 110th Street and above (Harlem World, baby! Check out begin solo tip, huh? the excellent remix of Horse & Carriage). 1M.O.R.E. blew up Ihe clubs with Superthug Queens stylee and we Well, few Girl Power may have suffered a setback this year with even had upstate representation from DMX, two albums artists could the loss of Ginger Spice (like we really cared?) but in a year, someone been busy. Brooklyn in tha house, have dreamed there was no shortage of female talent in the R&B world. well sorta, A Tribe Called Quest decided to call it a day for a better Destiny's Child were undoubtedly THE girl group of the with the release of their 5th and final album The Love start to 1998 year. I knowy'all were gettin your groove on to No, No, Movement. Black Star continued to uphold the "hip-hop- than have a No and With Me. The girls had a little lull but returned with-a-brain" tradition with their much anticipated debut No. 1 hit on at the end of the year with the amazing Timbaland pro set- No Alizc or Benjamins Here and LA based Black the Top 40, duced Get On The Bus, their latest release which is Eyed Peas had us all shouting "That's the joint, that's especially a US taken from the Why Do Fools Fall In Love soundtrack. the jam!!". A mention has to go to Jurassic Five and their R'n'B singer album J5, these boys came along and have lit up hip- and that is We first heard her quite stunning vocals on Quincy hop. exactly what Jones' album Q'sJook Joint and this year, lamia did not happened to disappoint with her self-titled debut album. However, Music moguls/producers made releases but none really Usher. After due to the lack of promotion, neither sales nor general lived up to the hype, there was JD's Life in 1472 (hold blowing up on opinion will reflect the quality of this release which is up though, we did all dig Sweetheart, if only for the mport in '97 so often the case with R&B. Other notable releases video) and Master P's MP Da Last Don. Incidentally, both You Make Me include that from Mya, Kelly Price's stunning Soul Of A producers have decided not to release any further solo Wanna got a Woman and the wicked but underrated Miss Jones material and will concentrate solely on their recording British release album. On the single tip, who could forget Tatyana Ali's artists from now on thank God for that!! Missy and entered Daydreaming or for the real R'n'B connoisseur, that took us one step closer to that filth-pit known as pop- as a new entry bangin' remix of Taral's How Can I Get Over You, it's hop with a collaboration with Mel B aka. Scary Spice, at the top of times like this when you know LL's still got the skillz. yeah we all loved that song / Want You Back not! Word the charts has it that the Spice Girls flew over to the US recently back in Janu 1 he UK didn't fair badly either on the lady front with Bev to talk to leddy Riley about plans for their next album, ary. Since then erly Knight and Kele Le Roc breaking through with don't say I didn't warn ya! Usher has their albums Prodigal Sista and Everybody's Somebody released Nice & Slow and My Way, both of which were respectively. Beverly hadn't dropped anything since There was no significant contribution from THAT man; - relatively low key and the man seemed to disappear. Flavour ofFhe Old Skool but she came back with one Puffy, until the end of the year and boy, did he hit us Have no fear, fans can look forward to a forthcoming of the summer blockbusters Made It Back, Redman hard - showcase at London's newly opened Sound single One Day You'll Be Mine as well as Usher's big helped on rap and Beverly you definitely back. Hinda Republic (which he sunk some; money into), perfor break onscreen in that "extended-Tommy-Hilfiger-com- Hicks came from nowhere at the start of the year and mance at the MOBO's and 3 new studio albums from mercial" feature The Faculty in 1999. immediately started hitting us with tune after tune. How faith, lotal and 112. Al last the wicked Love Like This can you forget You Fhink You Own Me. With Shola Ama was given a release and laid down its claim as tune of Sticking with the teens. Brandy & Monica had a sur and these three young ladies as well as The Hon- the year. Faith's album Keep The Faith was packed prising crossover hit with The Boy Is Mine. The song eyz? It looks a bit good for the R&B scene with tunes and will certainly go on to clas itself not only caught our attention but also provided sic status. Ihe total album was a seri various stories about the major rivalry between the two Another Level are on another level, ous disappointment, but 112s - why did Brandy perform solo on The Tonight Show and much props must go to the four Room 112 made up for it and what about the punch up at the MTV Video Awards? boys, they produce tunes which made me think twice about Brandy's second album Never Say Never hit stores in really are doing it, their vocals the boys' ability. June and Monica's The Boy Is Mine followed shortly. are as good as anybody else Both long players have gone on to achieve platinum out there and the production Sheeceeeesh, some people success, but the battle will go on and on. Meanwhile from Blacksmith is top draw. take their time, don't they? the other teenage sensation Aaliyah (yeah, she's still a Their ability to crossover and It's taken 3 years for R Kelly to teenager) provided us with one of the summer's bring a street edge to the charts write and release his new dou anthems- a clever concoction of Timbaland beats Arc is incredible, record bosses must ble album R, but if you heard it You That Somebody be kicking themselves for turning you know it's worth the wait. That, these boys down, remember they had though, still doesn't top the 8 years 1998 must be remembered as the year of The Fugees, to go to the States to get a deal. Be Alone 's taken Whitney Houston to release all 3 members managed to hit the headlines over the No More started it all off, but for me Freak Me only her 4th studio album, My Love Is Your Love. year. Wyclef began the year In the middle of the feud was right on point and these boys just keep coming! Guys, it's real nice to have you back and all but do you between LL and Canibus, he was dissed as a Bob Mar- think you could hurry the hell up next time?! ley impostor by LL and as his comeback 'Clef recorded Will Smith set the scene alight with his own brand of What's 'Clef Got To Do With It. Gone Till November kept pop hop and we thought long and hard about whether 1999! Watch out for new albums from the street soul us rockin' all through the early months of the year (R you could really call Will Smith an MC? Well not really, masters Blackstreet, the beautiful trio TLC, toxy Brown, Kelly's vocals made the remix) and after a quiet sum but with infectious hits like Men In Black, Gettin Jiggy Queen of R&B MaryJ, Men Of Vision and of course the mer he returned to end the year on a high note with With It, Just Fhc 2 Of Us and Miami, how could you hate much awaited second set from D'Angclo. On a British a remix of Queens Another One Bites the Dust. Pras this guy? You gotta check out his latest flick "Enemy Of tip I'm looking forward to hearing some new stuff took the world by storm with the massive hit Ghetto The State", 1998 was his year, and he's storming into from Nine Yards, Kleshay, Kele Le Roc and even the All Superstar as well as giving the Grease theme tune 1999 too. Saints. Bring it on! some edge in the form of the catchy Blue Angels, truly

cementing his place in pop-hop circles. Lauryn penned Rap went back to its roots this year. To the good ol' Boo 1999 - THA BOMB! the excellent A Rose Is Still A Rose for diva and idol gie Down (aka. The Bronx) where it all started. The likes Kidphobce & Milcn Aretha Franklin, has a baby son Zion and releases what of Big Pun, Fat Joe, Lord Tariq & Peter Gunz hit us with was truly one of the hip-hop albums of the year The floor fillers such as Still Not A Player and Deja vu 18 ^Jfc^* Film 18 January 1999 Reviews Psycho ** Starring : Vince Vaughn, Anne Heche, Julianne Moore, Viggo Mortensen, William H Macy Director: Gus Van Sant

here's something very strange sic in the sixties simply don't stand up to about Gus Van Sant's remake of nineties moviemaking. This Psycho is TPsycho. It's not the fact that it's (dare I say it) boring. It treads water for very, very, very similar to Hitchcock's an hour, only hotting up when Moore original - I was expecting that when I finally enters the Bates' gothic home to walked into the cinema. The problem is discover the truth. That's not to say that that, despite the fact that it's almost the the original I'sycho isn't still a great same film, it's far, far worse. And I don't movie, it's just that any piece of art has know why. to be judged - at least in part - by the stan It's not the cast - admittedly, Anne dards of the day. For example, if the Heche (Six Days Seven Nights, Volcano) forthcoming Star Wars Episode One is hardly in the same league as middle- retains exactly the same look and effects class fantasy girl Janet Leigh, but it's cer as A New Hope did in 1977, it won't tainly not a bad rendition of Marion deserve the same recognition because it Crane. Moreover, whilst Vince Vaughn won't have the same ground-breaking (Swingers, The Lost World) is the antithe originality. Similarly, this doesn't mean sis of Anthony Perkins in the crucial Nor that there's anything wrong with remak man Bates role, he comes away from the ing old movies - see Scarface, The Mag movie with credit in tact thanks to a nice Psycho 1999 vs Psycho 1960. Same shower. Same knife. New blood. nificent Seven, High Society, and the line in disconcerting laughter and ner upcoming You've Got Mail for prime vous twitching. the likes of My Own Private Idaho, Drug- Bates motel, run by Vaughn and his mys examples of good remakes - it simply It's definitely not the direction - Van store Cowboy and last year's brilliant terious mother. The classic shower scene means that there's no point in remaking Sant goes to great pains to re-create 99% Good Will Hunting on his CV, Van Sant is ensues and her sister (Moore) and something if you don't add something of the original (only adding in a couple amongst Hollywood's foremost direc boyfriend (Mortensen) set off on her new. Van Sant has claimed that all he of additional details which help to explain tors. trail, call in a Private Lye (the ever-reliable wanted to do was raise the profile of the Vaughn's complex mentality). Every Above all, it certainly isn't the plot, Macy) and try to find out what links her original, and to those of you who haven't scene, every camera angle and every which is 100% the same as it was in disappearance and the motel. seen it, I suggest you take his advice - edit is the same - even the opening titles 1960. Heche steals $400 000 from her Perhaps it's simply the passage of and rent the video D are copied from Hitchcock. Besides, with boss, flees town, hiding out in the lonely time. The elements that produced a clas Dave The Opposite of Sex * * Starring : Christina Ricci, Martin Donovan, Lisa Kudrow, Ivan Sergei Director: Don Roos

ave you ever missed a fort unlikely seduction of his new nice but night's episodes of your dim boyfriend, Ivan Sergei. Very soon H favourite soap opera and com the resulting love triangle is further com pletely lost track of what's going on? plicated by announcements of preg Whatever the reason for the lapse in nancy, charges of sexual harassment, your devotion, there's usually someone and other storylines culled from the on hand to bring you up to date with a scripts of third rate Dallas spin offs. swift summary of the recent develop There are one or two funny lines, ments in an oddly eventful Square, and Kudrow has her fair share as the Close or Street in the land of TV. The repressed Lucia. However, she seems opening 5 minutes of Ihe Opposite of unable to abandon the trademark kook- Sex ate liable to remind you of such a iness of her role as Pheobe from Friends, briefing - though with a now obligatory and comes across as half scatty, half post-modern slant it's the film's central uptight. Even though she shares screen character, 16 year Deedee - played by time evenly with her co-stars, it's Ricci The Adams Family's Christina Ricci who dominates the film. Unfortunately, (more recently star of indie-hits The Ice her non-politically correct knowing com Storm and The Last of the High Kings) - mentary fails to illicit the belly laughs it whose voice-over provides the explana Eighteen certificate here we come. aims for, and succeeds in lending the tion of her own troubled circumstances. proceedings an irritatingly self-satisfied Ricci's unenthusiastic mourning at heads for Indiana and her long lost half- going nature provides a standing invita tone. her step-father's funeral suggests that brother (Donovan), though her reasons tion for Ricci's precocious mercenary When a soap like Channel 5's plainly she's not so upset to see the back of him, for doing so probably extend beyond wiles. Donovan's friend (and his dead ridiculous Sunset Beach does a better job but bereavement has driven her mother the hope of renewing acquaintances. lover's sister - keep up) Kudrow is con of satirising attitudes to sex in the 90s, a to unbearably neurotic depths. Desper Thanks to the legacy of his gay lover, vinced that Ricci is no good, and sure film like this seems pretty pointless. Q ate to escape her Louisiana home, Ricci Donovan is a wealthy man, and his easy enough, she sets about the rather Simon 18 January 1999 Film 19 Reviews St Competition

71 **

Starring : Sean Gullette, Mark Margolis, Ben Shenkman, Pamela Hart Director: Darren Aronofsky PDATE

s well as gaining world-wide criti cal praise, 7t has secured first- Good Will A time director Darren Aronofsky the Directing Award for Dramatic Hunting Composition at the Sundance Film Festival. With these accolades in mind I Amongst all the Hollywood success sto was expecting a visual feast when I ries of last year, Matt Damon and Ben entered the cinema. I was not disap Afleck strode to the front of the pack pointed. Aronofsky demonstrates his with this brilliantly moving film. amazing command of cinematography, Two years ago, so the story goes, showcasing non-linear editing (MTV the pair were in their final year at Har style, epilepsy inducing, cutting) and vard and decided they wanted to be some bizzare camera set-ups (at times actors. Trouble was they didn't think strapping cameras to various actors they were good enough to get cast in bodyparts). But apart from all these anyone else's film, so they wrote their doubtless fascinating and innovative Introduction to mad scientists. No 1 - the slinky obsession own. That script turned into Good Will 'tricks' is there a film underneath the Hunting, and two years later they're audio-visual bombardment? While the plot sometimes does get him or are only aiding him to feed their Oscar winning millionaires, dating The answer is a resounding yes - a little tenuous, (an overly aggressive own selfish needs. Whether the film is Gwyneth Paltrow and Winona Ryder and with solid performances from the sup Wall Street firm and a Kabbalah sect try science fiction is another matter entirely, amongst the biggest stars in Hollywood. porting cast (who mainly consist of the to unlock the secrets of their holy texts) so don't expect Mulder and Scully or any Lucky, lucky bastards. director's friends and family), and Sean the extreme pace at which the film's warp drives to start appearing. Gullette's impressive display as a man spi storyline advances forces you to put such If you're allergic to strobes or value ralling into paranoia. The film demands gripes aside and concentrate on what's your ears, don't see this film - everyone The ice Storm self-mutilation and a series of painfully going on on-screen. Considered as a else can sit back and fry their brains, realistic fits from Gullette, which he duly thriller the film works well, keeping the happy in the knowledge that they are Despite a desperately sad ending (make- completes with a manic stare reminiscent viewer attempting to second guess the watching a great film. sure you buy five boxes of Kleenex of Nicholson's glory days in One Hew true motives of the people surrounding Joel. before watching the movie) and a over the Cuckoos Nest.. Gullette - whether they actually care for deceptively simple premise, Ang Lee's film has been (justifiably) showered in critical plaudits. Whilst a seventies-set drama sur Win cinema tickets with the rounding a crisis-laden suburban family might not sound like rivetting viewing, an eclectic array of Hollywood's finest (the likes of Kevin Kline, joan Allen, Eli jah Wood and Sigourney Weaver) bring The Ice Storm to life with a near perfect display of ensemble acting. Add in bril liant direction, a soul destroying script and that ending, and you're left with what can only be described as a classic KENSINGTON piece of film-making. Anastasia As ever, those lovely people at the Email your answer to film.felix@ A huge number of entries were Odeon Kensington (no 9 or no 10 bus, ic.ac.uk before 6pm on Fucsday 19th received for the Psycho competition, all Disney may have come in for some flak in case you're interested) give you and January to be in with a chance. Winners correctly identifying that Anthony Perkins recently with their none too accurate re a friend the opportunity to see a film for will be drawn at random from the virtual played Norman Bates in Hitchcock's (far tellings of Pocohontas and Mulan, but free. For a change, however, this week hat. superior) 1960 original. The first five Twentieth Century fox's Anastasia is on the film in question will come as a sur The winners of issue 1131 's Meetjoe names to be picked out by the random a completely different level. For starters, prise (OK, so I don't know what the prize Black competition were: email selector were: this Anastasia isn't executed - instead is yet, but rest assured that there will be she's chased around Paris by the hench one). Samaher Alahmed Yin Loong Chao men of the evil Rasputin. Hmmm. On Anyhow, to win a pair of tickets all Imogen Lucas Katie Hopkins the other hand, with Meg Ryan, John you have to do is answer the following RJchard Hopkins Lauren Robinson Cusack, and Kelsey Grammer on voice- (deceptively simple) question: Helen Coates Scott Edmunds over duty, there's certainly no expense Ben Crabshaw Ben Pickersglll spared, and at times the end product is Name all the actors who have beautifully drawn. I lowever, it still lacks played Anakln Skywalker (In any one They all correctly identified that Brad Pitt Could all prisewinners please drop into the charm and sense of fun that gives of the four Star Wars Installments played a German mountaineer (with a the Felix office (in the south-east corner Disney classics a real crossover into the; currently In existence). very dodgy accent) in Seven Years in of Beit Quad) sometime this week to col adult market. D Tibet lect their prizes. Dave 20 Games 18 January 1999 Blizzard Compilation [Diablo, Starcraft and warcraft II] (PC) Blizzard

You can always tell when our beloved Starcraft has been one of my tains a very comprehen Games Editor is short of material - "Here favourite games for some time. It is sive section detailing the you go" he said "Blizzard have just released (again) very similar to C&C, but is set in various units available to three games in a special pack. Pop off and the far ends of the galaxy (or some the races. It also con do me 200 words on each." And he dis where like that). You can control one of tains a brief history of appears off to the union bar. Typical. three races; humans (as in "You puny..."), each of these races, Zergs (as in the noise peo which rather than being ple make when they've had the usual load of cod- their throat torn out by a mystical mush, actually sort of alien version of a contains some useful 1 doberman) and the myste hints on strategy for rious and rather tetchy Pro- combat and survival, pro toss. The gameplay is viding you're prepared somewhat more varied to read between the The electrics in the earliest dungeons than in either Warcraft or lines. The whole thing is were never that safe C&C, with missions ranging very well put together,

The Human Is weak, ore will smash human from securing landing and there are influences from a vast dering around the village sited above this zones through full-frontal range of different semi-classics (more dungeon and talking to its down-trodden Ihe original Warcraft was released (if assaults on alien bases, through creep obvious ones being C&C, Space Hulk, inhabitants. I here's the usual plethora of memory serves me right) shortly before ing around alien-infested ships looking Civilisation). Unless you're actually aller weapons, armour and magical items, Command & Conquer, and suffered for lost personnel and/or data files, to sit gic to this kind of futuristic stuff, you'll and it makes for a satisfying, if at times (somewhat unfairly) due to the blitz of ting tight in a beleaguered garrison des love it. hard, one-player game. Where it really hype surrounding Westwood's undoubt perately hoping that your evacuation Diablo is the third game in the pack. comes into its own is in its multiplayer edly excellent effort. It also lost out to ships will arrive before your base is wiped It's a more traditional RPG, with you tak environment. Up to four people can C&C in that it didn't have a multiplayer out. Blizzard have made full use of their ing charge of a character from one; of link up and go on the same quest mode - almost a cardinal sin now, but not imagination in putting the package three different backgrounds (warrior - together, and Blizzard even provide you so uncommon a few years ago. Rather together, and as well as a mini-tutorial big sword, heavy eyebrows, skin colour with some free internet software to help than being set in the near future, War- and the game controls, the manual con- of a tandoori chicken; rogue - female, you do this, should you be like me and craft was set in a mythical land bow-mistress, clven, funny pointy not have any friends. "I he more you where tribes of men and ores ears; sorcerer - long white beard, play this game the more it becomes fought it out, competing for gold, smells funny, good with fireworks). clear that it has been designed primarily lumber and land. Warcraft II was The action takes place below for multiplayer use - many of the supra- released in 1996 and, as the name ground, in a vast dungeon with a baddies arc well nigh impossible to suggests, it is bigger and better. It variety of lairs. The level design is defeat on your own. also includes that crucial multi a series of quests, each of which The logic behind compilation sets is player component (up to 8 players tends to end with the destruction usually one stonker, one ok and one can hook up together at a time). (hopefully) ofasupra-baddie. How slightly iffy. In this case we have one The graphics are much improved ever, there's none of that nonsense which is excellent (Starcraft), and two on both the original and C&C, but about completing one quest before which are good, particularly as multi nonetheless are starting to show you start the next. If you like, you player games. It's a particularly good their age. Still, if you like RPGs can go off halfway through one, do bundle, and well worth the £35 for which and C&C, this is well worth the another one and come back to fin you'll find it on sale in all good game price. This version includes an ish the first off when you like. I his shops. Oh come on, it's less than [12 expansion pack ("Beyond the Dark If you have to shoot, shoot; don't talk. makes for a very open-ended each. Portal", since you asked). game. You get your quests by wan- Danny

in From the Cold - What Blizzard are getting ready Diablo 2 Warcraft II - Platinum

Never one to walk away from can wave a pointy spear at. No, amazingly enough it's not what you eight teams, all attempting to turn their a profitable sequel Blizzard The graphics are expected are expecting. They have not done a opposite numbers into embarrassed and are attempting to shine up to be improved on and, Dune 2000. There are no massive annoyed bad losers. their shields and swords and with optional 3Dfx support, improvements in the graphics or in the Oh, for those who mock there are lead us back into the nasty will almost deflnately be a sound. No new introductions. In fact also two more campaigns to play by world of dungeons, crypts and wonder to watch (with line they have actually left the game pretty yourself - though if you have bought the caverns to fight foes and of sight lighting effects and much alone. So why would you want to package to play single player games you gather treasure. shading being two of the buy a game for full price that you could either have a slight obsession or have five new characters; The big improvements). already buy in a compilation or in a bud too much money to throw at computer Amazon, Necromancer, Pal Expected to fill four CDs get range? games (though if this is so you can adin, Sorceress and Barbarian one for each Act) and to be Networks, or rather the abilty to play always buy games and review them for (he's thick but can carry two released sometime this over the internet using the; now almost tclix). weapons at once) and new year. Blizzard arc being very famous Battle.net. This package allows Blizzard arc going to release War non-playing characters all cagey on announcing an you to play and compete in a huge lad craft II sometime in the first half of this wanting a piece of the action. exact release date. der system against people all over the year. Someone out there is probably Expect more rumbles than you world. It also allows big battles of up to looking forward to it. I can't say I am. 18 January 1999 21

Gangsters (PC) Eidos

copies and remembered bruises ordering your team to pop down the ees. The town does feel a little like a and scars long since faded. shop to buy a copy of the local paper - 1930's City. The game actually feels good "lt.su I iji The game itself is based in well ok I made the last task up but with to play - despite the burning, blowing up Mil'tit the fictional town of New Tem other gangs coveting your little area and and shooting that goes on, and the only perance, where you and several willing to put more lead into your diet, small gripette is that it perhaps takes too Mi . rivals have decided to carve the someone must pop down to the shops long to get a proper empire flowing and town into a perfect example of for the milk and coffee. so for some takes a little too long to get organised crime capital. After play Afterthe orders stage it is time to hit going. For those who love management } ing a series of short tutorials which the streets and watch all your best laid games it is one to sit on the shelf and introduce most of the basic moves plans suffer from those little irritants play into the long hours. For those with (your bread and butter extortion known as the general public, the police only arcade games and fast flowing Buy to* $rm rackets, and rather nasty Gang and other gangsters. Luckily there are still graphics on their minds it's not going to i/~\ » r ster based mayhem), its time to a few tricks up your sleeve, and while turn your head in the same way that Henry's Dressmaking Habit was well known get on with the job of controlling your thugs are pretty brainless they can C&C and Red Alert could. It's good, Lat t's an offer I can't refuse, they first told the town proper. deviate from the plans with a simple few Tony, but not quite good enough to talk me last summer - and they were right. As in the real world the idea is not clicks of the mouse. The action scenes its way out of the concrete overcoat. The people behind Gangsters rounded to dirty your own hands but to force oth are also the place to be to sec your little Gary S. up several not that busy journalists, took ers to dirty theirs. This you do by organ empire move onwards and upwards, them to Greenham Common - the site of ising your men into teams with weapons, very rewarding in a nasty pain the abandoned US airbase, and let us go vehicles and sufficient manpower. These inflicting way. mad with automatic paint guns, teams are then given their orders for Although there has not been grenades and smoke bombs. Oh and the week with obvious risks for assassi a huge improvement in the graph while we were there they let us play nations, bombings and setting fire to ics or the sound since the summer with the game. First impressions were the businesses who fail to buy into the both are about average in a game that the game was going to be another 'insurance market'? The 'valuable mutual like this. The town can be viewed big Eidos game. It looked pretty enough benefit market' to give it its full name. either in simple top down plan to play with and appeared to have the There is obviously less risk but also less mode - which is easier to plan depth of gameplay that enables a game profit to be made by owning a few clean with, or in a 3D mode - which is to be tasking without forcing a two week shops, but they can be used to mix good used for the action sequences. manual reading session. Winter drew on and bad money and provide a local safe The victims, sorry citizens, of New and finally the game was rounded off, house for the little dears who work for Temperance can be heard and the same journalists received review you. The least risk of course goes with seen to interact with your employ Bloke behaving badly

ideas from Eidos - Apart from Lara IV what's in store ! warzone 2100

Damn those satellite weapon platforms. North America and to get some of those sional remnant of civilizarion. Yep you When they're not being used to shoot at lost technologies working again (though could well be thinking Mad Max. Mulder and Scully by if you ask me leaving it Despite having a story sounding rogue Al's they go all as a smoking ruin and like Mad Max it does appear to be half wrong and trigger a global moving to Europe might decent (at this stage of development nuclear armegeddon. It's be a more sound idea). anyway). Placed very near the Battle- just not fair. If you think this sounds zone 2000 ideal of realtime playing com Thus the scene is se rather Mad Maxesque, bined with base strategy and defence it for Warzone 2100. As one you would not be too could challenge Tiberian Sun, whenever of the remaining million far from being wrong. that decides to poke its head above the people left on the smok Against you are various ground and parade itself for our delights. doesn't make the game impossible to ing ruins you have the task of rebuilding bands of scavengers along with the occa Let's hope the large number of options understand and play properly.

Not the New Year News

Pentium III - Intel goes for speed Free Lunch pays dough

In a very low key way Intel Corp released details of the next generation of proces Freeserve (the Free internet service provider paid for by Dixons - your friendly, neigh sors. Chosing the highly original name Pentium III, Intel intend to start shipping 450 bourhood electrical retailer) has managed to entice over 900,000 people to use Inter and 500 MHz versions immediately. Along with the raw clock speed increase, they net Explorer 4 and sign their pledge to their internet connection. Officially the fastest have also included some extra hardware to help speed up video, audio and speech growing ISP in the UK (900 000 customers in 5 months kicks AOL's UK branch into recognition tasks. the dirt.) Intel also intend to move to a new processing facility which should allow the Mark Danby, general manager of Freeserve said: "It shows we have developed speed to increase to 600 MHz and above. Intel will also release a mobile version of the right formula for our customers and that you don't have to pay for a first class the chip (in the new 600 MHz flavour) for laptops but not until the second half of internet service." The big catch is that for those less technically adept users there is this year. Just in time for the Millenium bug if they're lucky. no free advice and help line. Best stick to the 56k College service then. 22 Sport 18 January 1999

Football Ladie's Hockey Bridge 4th XI 2nd XI National U25 Tournament IC 5 -1 UCL IC 0 - 8 Royal Free

An exceptional performance from the Bondage Girl drove a full team to the Recently IC Bridge Club entered for the of the rest of the club! IC fourth's, fresh from their midsea- match in style, only going onto the pave London qualification round of the son break (to such delightful places as ment once. From then on it was all National U25 Paris contest. For the new I Dom Goodwin - Jon Todd (x-IC) Rhyl, Llanboidy and Aldershot). We downhill, mainly because we'd turned recruits in the club this was to be an 10 Michael Lee Klen Vong - Anson cemented our position at the top of up to play hockey and ended up playing opportunity to play bridge for the first Williams ULU Division 3 and are now in a great water polo (taking our own umpire time. I or the more seasoned players in II Giles Cope - Ben Van Lierop position to reach the unparalleled should have helped, but unfortunately the club it was to be an opportunity to 12 Eric Parker - John Douglas heights of division 2. Of the 8 league Saboteur didn't do anything to jeopar hone their tournament play ready for the 13 Kevin Tarn - Tom Oag games remaining, the fourth's should dise the oppositions score). Scousc Git, forthcoming Portland Bowl matches. At 14 AnnaigJacquemard - Rupert Chaplin be aiming to win at least 5 or 6. who was too hungover to play, was least that was the theory. 15 Michael Dias - Andrew Clery (x-IC) This game exploded into life in the badly missed, although to be honest A strong field of players made for dif 16 Daniel Flook - Steve Parker first few minutes as IC raced into a the forwards rarely got the ball. 2 Jags ficult but enjoyable play. Unfortunately, 17 Ralph Martin - Raj Dash two goal lead with goals by Aiden, fol got in some good elbow tackles, while the strong field and complexity of some 18 Ivan Leung - Jamie Wood lowing good work by Steve and Derek, everyone else got their exercise run hands proved too much for many of the 21 Maurice Lee Kien Vong - Delphine and an embarrassed UCL defender. ning around the alcohol section of Sains- IC pairs, however, x-IC partnership Dom Jarraud From then on the rest of the game was bury's - its good to see the ladies 2nd Goowin (Bat) and Jon Todd (Hcff) did win really a formality, the only question team still has its priorities straight. the overall competition, beating 3 Eng being how many could IC score. The land pairs, comfortably qualifying for the OK. Even allowing for exams, the start answer: five, the extra goals coming national finals. of term and even the weather, I'd have from Adam, Nima and a penalty from Also received... Especially good performances by thought you lot could do a little better Gurm (who else could have finished so Michael Lee Klen Vong and his partner than three brief articles. clinically form 12 yards?). A mention to Hockey: IC 1 9-2 UCLMS Anson Williams saw them beat everyone Last term saw a good range of arti Dave Wishart who was "f**ing amazing" else in the club, including both Imperial cles from lots of teams and clubs and (his words) but in mine "f**ing shite" as Refs were rubbish, and the weather was A and B teams. Another impressive per I hope that continues into this term. So he gave away a penalty which was poor. Although not as poor as the oppo formance was that of Annaig Jazque- get those articles in. In the meantime crappily saved by Stu and UC scored sition. Ic should have had twice as mard >and Rupert Chapli, who as a enjoy these articles from the world of with the follow up. Final score 5-1 to IC. many goals. beginners pair did very well beating most professional sport. Gus

INTERESTED IN A WORKING London nightline HOLIDAY ADVENTURE? 01 "71 ftOI fl1fl1 TO FIND OUT ABOUT WORKING OPPORTUNITIES IN AMEBIC A SOUTH AFRICA London Nightline needs volunteers We are a confidential listening and practical information C A N A D A f$ftf$\ GHANA helpline, run by students for students. We are open from 6pm until Sam every night of term. At the moment we AUSTRALIA JAMAICA are looking for students who want to train as volunteers. We don't care what age or sex you are, or what college NEW ZEALAND you are from, or what course you are studying. If you can give up three nights a term and think that you would be COME TO THE able to listen to someone in a friendly, non-judgmental way you could be ideal for us. You don't need any expe ICU BUNAC SOCIETY'S rience, we'll give you all the training you need. So if you want to help other students and join an organisation with INFORMATION SESSION ON a fun and active social side please get in touch. TUESDAY19JANUARY Come along to our Introductory Talk IN THE on Tuesday 9th February at 7.00pm CLORE IECTURE THEATRE, in ULU, room 3C HUXLEY BUILDING, 6PM or ring the helpline (number above).

For details email ICU BUNAC chair Nightline is here, whether you want Angela Parkin information or simply someone to talk to. a. parkin @ic.ac. uk 18 January 1998 Sport & Diversions 23

CRICKET: England 2nd best - again

Following a series win against South and looked on course for a 4-0 defeat in Africa last summer, and the prospect of the five match scries, so cue the usual not having to face spin king Shane response of the England cricket team in Warne, England supporters were filled these circumstances - win a match. with hope and expectation that England Decent batting from skipper Alec Stew would actually give Australia a run for art, relieved of the wicket-keeping duties, their money for the first time in 10 years. gave England a decent score. Darren The build up to the first test was not Gough then bowled some of the most ideal, with several players showing a lack hostile fast bowling I have seen by an of form in the warm-up matches and a English bowler, and Australia's batting worrying back problem for former cap was finally blown away for once, giving tain Mike Atherton. The first test was England a 12 run victory, after the hosts played in Brisbane at the end of Nove- were seemingly cruising to the win. I his meber, and the early going looked to be set up the possibility of England squaring fairly even, with Australia reaching 106- the series in Sydney. Although the 4. But a number of missed chances fol Hat-trick Victims: Ian Healy, Stuart McGill and Colin Miller fall to successive deliv pitched turned square and Warne lowed which allowed Steve Waugh and eries from Darren Gough, who became the first English bowler for 100 years to returned to play alongside the impressive Ian Healey (perennial thorns in England's take an Ashes hat trick against Australia McGill, England did not play badly, but a side) to put on 187 runs for the 6th poor decision by the IV replay umpire wicket, and some extra runs from the tail Australia. Onto Perth, and a much faster match was the performance of Tudor, giving Slater in when he was clearly out took the total to 485. Predictably England wicket saw 21-year old Earl's Court native looking decidedly relaxed and hostile, eventually cost England the match. could not manage to match this score, Alex Tudor make his test match debut. which made the decision to leave him So although I am pleased my prediction but looked like the might get pretty close Unfortunately the England batting (miss out for the next test in Adelaide ques from November (3-1 to Australia) came at 360-6 until the tail collapsed to 375 all ing best batsman Graham Thorpe, tionable to say the least. This was the out right, it is disappointing to only see out. A rapid-fire century from dashing returned home with a serious back prob ground England won their only test England playing well when they have opener Michael Slater set up a large tar lem) was woeful, making only 112 & match of the last tour, but it was not to already conceded the series. On the get for England, who predictably wilted 191. Australia romped to a 7 wicket vic be this time. A big hundred from Justin bright sides England surely .start as one to the leg spin of Stuart McGill, and were tory inside 3 days, and the scries was Langer and a complete lack of applica of the favourites for this summer's cricket saved defeat by a freak thunderstorm. looking decidedly out of England's reach. tion by Lngland's tail in cither innings led World Cup, with conditions giving the Definitely a morale if not actual victory for The only positive to come out of the to a 205 run loss. England were down host side a distinct advantage.

Bound Editions The following people ordered 1997-8 Bound Editions and have not yet collected them. Please pop into the Felix Office, with a cheque for £32 made payable to 'ICU Publications Board (Felix)', at your convenience.

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Around IC & Beyond Mon 18 Tues 19 Wed 20 Thurs 21 Fri 22 Sat 23 Sun 24

Env Soc: Jubilee 2000 LabSoc: John Monks, ICSM RAG - Invasion of ICSM RAG - Circle Line ICSM RAG - RAG Ball @ Electric Cafe, dBs, EREE Coalition Meeting, Lec TUC Gen Sec, RCS Lec London am Pub Crawl 11am Shepherds Bush Empire 9pm-12am ture Theatre 2, Physics ture Theatre C 1pm £15 in advance from 6pm Env Soc: Meeting to Erasmus Information BMS, St Mary's & CX UFC in STOIC 6pm design a Renewables Session for students 7pm CAG: fools for Self Physics Course. 1.30pm planning to study Reliance, Basement of ICSM RAG-Jazz, lood & abroad. Ante Room, Bust-a-gut Comedy, dBs Beit Quad 6pm Soiree @ St Mary's6pm ICSM RAG - Battle of the Level 1 Sherfield £2.50 8pm Bands Bop @ CX 11.30am-2.30pm ICSM RAG - Games @ ICSM RAG - Revue & 7.30pm Idiot Son (who played at CX 7pm Hypnotist @ CX 7pm CAG: Soup Run, Base ICU I ri 8 January) el al Club XS, ICU, EREE ment Kitchen, Weeks Water Rats, Grays Inn STA Bar Trivia DaVinci's 9pm-1 am Hall 8pm Road 8pm 8pm Cocktail Night, DaVinci's Common People, ICU CAG: Soup Run, Base 5-11pm £1 9pm-2am ment Kitchen, Weeks Hall 8pm ICSM RAG - Post crawl bop @ St Mary's 11pm 24 Sport & Crossword 18 January 1999

lower than normal for the remainder of the short sea US SPORT son, which begins on February Sth. Jordan retires a very rich ($24million dollar contract BASKETBALL: Jordan's plus $45 million in sponsorship per year) and well- loved man. But it seems the sport he served so well for retirement leaves chasm the past decade is going to be left with the almost imposible task of trying to find some way to fill the gap in us's sporting psyche created by his departure.

The retirement last week of Michael Jordan, regarded NFL: Denver vJets, Atlanta v Minnesota by many as one of the greatest professional athletes ever, has left the American people, and much of the In conference finals world, in a state of shock. The greatest, and certainly wealthiest, player the Last weekend saw the NFL conference finals between National Basketball Association (NBA) has ever seen teams that are hard to separate in terms of ability. announced his intention to leave the sport saying "I Reigning champions the Denver Bronco's start as played it to the best I could play it. I tried to be the best favourites to recapture their SuperBowl title in two basketball player I could be." weeks time, but Atlanta or Minnesota will provide Jordan, whose name has been synonymous with tough competition in the SuperBowl. This of course the NBA for over 10 years says he is "99.9% certain" assumes the good but not-quite-good-enough New about retirement this time, having previously given up York Jets do not overcome the odds to defeat the 5 years ago, following the gunning down of his father. Broncos. After 6 championship winning seasons out of 8, and five most valuable player awards, Jordan felt it was the If I have space to fill again this term, I intend to pub "right time to leave the game. I am at peace with that. lish a full review of the NFL season and the Super Bowl Physically I am fine, but I am mentally exhausted." Michael Jordan shortly after it is played. If anyone out there feels they Jordan, holder of several multimillion dollar con know something about American Football and feeling tracts from various sponsors (including the 'Air Jordan' some ground after a bitter player strike that has lasted like writing an article get in contact. I am also willing trainer produced by the sports giant Nike), said he made over 7 months, and threated to wipe out the entire sea to publish articles on the FA Premiership/Rugby Pre his decision some time ago, but wanted to wait until son. The retirement of the sports greatest player will miership when/if space allows. If you want to write any the end of the lockout between teams and players have dismayed NBA officials who face an uphill task to thing drop mc a line at [email protected]. before announcing his decision. The lockout, which has re-engage the attention of a public disenchanted by the crippled almost the entire season this year, was recently greediness of owners and players. TV ratings and sta Gus solved after players and owners finally gave each other dium attendances will undoubtably be significantly

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