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An Interactive Guide to Self-Discovery for Women Elaine J University of South Florida Scholar Commons Graduate Theses and Dissertations Graduate School January 2012 An Interactive Guide to Self-Discovery for Women Elaine J. Taylor University of South Florida, [email protected] Follow this and additional works at: http://scholarcommons.usf.edu/etd Part of the American Studies Commons, and the Women's Studies Commons Scholar Commons Citation Taylor, Elaine J., "An Interactive Guide to Self-Discovery for Women" (2012). Graduate Theses and Dissertations. http://scholarcommons.usf.edu/etd/4238 This Thesis is brought to you for free and open access by the Graduate School at Scholar Commons. It has been accepted for inclusion in Graduate Theses and Dissertations by an authorized administrator of Scholar Commons. For more information, please contact [email protected]. An Interactive Guide to Self-Discovery for Women by Elaine J. Taylor A thesis submitted in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of Master of Arts Department of Women’s and Gender Studies College of Arts and Sciences University of South Florida Major Professor: Jane Jorgenson, Ph.D. Kim Golombisky, Ph.D. Navita James, Ph.D. Date of Approval: March 19, 2012 Keywords: mind-body-spirit, gender, race, class, sexuality Copyright © 2012, Elaine J. Taylor Table of Contents Abstract .............................................................................................................................. iii Chapter 1. Introduction ........................................................................................................1 Chapter 2. Understanding My Past ....................................................................................13 Childhood and Family: My Earliest Lessons .........................................................14 Defining Experiences .............................................................................................15 Writing Exercise: Defining Experiences ...................................................18 Communication: Learning My Place in the World ................................................21 Painful Lessons: Childhood Abuse ........................................................................25 The Woman I Was .................................................................................................29 Writing Exercise: This Is the Woman I Was .............................................31 Chapter 3. Present ..............................................................................................................32 Stress ....................................................................................................................38 Writing Exercise: Stress .............................................................................40 Simple Stress Remedies .........................................................................................41 Writing Exercise: Stress Remedies ............................................................42 Your Life’s Desk Top ............................................................................................43 Writing Exercise: Wishes and Dreams ......................................................46 Writing Exercise: Clearing Your Desktop .................................................47 Self-Induced Stress ................................................................................................48 Writing Exercise: Self-Imposed Stress ......................................................50 Tools for Stress Management ................................................................................51 Writing Exercise: Coping ..........................................................................54 Comparison ..............................................................................................................5 Fear ........................................................................................................................56 Writing Exercise: What Is Your Plan?.......................................................61 Boundaries .............................................................................................................62 Communication ......................................................................................................64 Writing Exercise: Language as Leverage to Self-Discovery .....................67 Assertive or Aggressive .........................................................................................70 Passive Aggressive Behavior .................................................................................71 Media Literacy .......................................................................................................73 Grief .......................................................................................................................77 Writing Exercise: What Are You Grieving? ..............................................82 Writing Exercise: Make Room for Good Things .......................................85 Responsibility in Relationships .............................................................................86 Personal Values ......................................................................................................88 Writing Exercise: Identify Your Personal Values .................................................90 Self-Esteem ............................................................................................................92 Identification of Resources ....................................................................................93 The Woman I Am ..................................................................................................95 Writing Exercise: The Woman You Are ...................................................97 Writing Exercise: Hello-I’m Glad to Meet Me ..........................................98 Chapter 4. The Future: Feminist Spirituality .....................................................................99 Writing Exercise: Religion, Spirituality, and Community...................................101 Chapter 5. Conclusion ......................................................................................................116 References ........................................................................................................................121 Abstract This project is a translation of ideas I have encountered in my journey through Women’s Studies. With this interactive book, I offer a concise, understandable, and empowering method for self-discovery from one feminist’s perspective. Traditional self-help materials often set the reader up as the one with the issue or problem and they rarely call out the functioning systems of oppression as a stumbling block or offer ways to circumvent them. With this project, I hope to shine light on the functioning systems of gender discrimination, racism, classism, and heterosexism, and to provide a framework for understanding. There are three main theoretical contexts for this project. The first context includes perspectives on language and the ways in which language limits women’s communication with themselves and with each other. .The second is gender socialization and how it enforces norms of “appropriate” female behavior. The third context is recent work in feminist spirituality and the possibilities it offers for recovering a spiritual self in direct relationship to a higher being. By narrating my own experiences in these three areas, and by offering resources and tools for further exploration, I hope this thesis will enable readers to understand that it is not they who are sick or in need of “self-help” but the society and culture in which they live. iii Chapter 1 Introduction I was born in 1960. That makes for easy math whenever I forget my age, which is quite often. I don’t forget because I am absentminded, I forget because age isn’t something I focus on very often. My earliest wish was to be grown or dead. So now I’m grown and that particular wish came true. I did not attend college after I graduated from high school. I recall that I mildly wanted to continue my education but at the time I really didn’t consider it a viable option. My family never talked about college. Neither one of my parents graduated from high school. The conversations in my family centered on a good work ethic and Christian righteousness. Instead of going to college, I went to work, got married, and had children. I married at twenty, delivered my daughter at 23 and my son at 27. Everything proceeded according to a plan carefully laid out for me by my family, my church, and my community. It was a plan I happily implemented, a plan that would place me neatly into my position as a second class citizen in the United States of America because I was born a female. In the spring of 2003, I chose to return to college. At the time, I had become a full-time caregiver for my mother-in-law who had experienced a debilitating stroke. I graduated from high school in 1978. I remember reviewing the list of available majors along with an advisor. I read the entire list because I had no idea what I wanted to study. Near the very end of the list I spotted a major that gave my heart a little jolt. “Women’s Studies” was the name of the program, and I was instantly intrigued. I asked the advisor 1 about it, and s/he told me that wasn’t a very good choice. “Much better to go with something more traditional, more acceptable, something with a broader appeal,” s/he said. I don’t remember if I declared a
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