December 15, 1933
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\ EXAMS THE BREEZE XMAS VOL. XII HARRISONBURG, VIRGINIA, DECEMBER U, 1933 NUMBER 11 Columbus Lands at San Salvador Chief Ritzyolecuss Secretary Gives Out An Interview with Vaseo Da Gama Plans "America Discovered" Smokes Peace Pipe Facts for First Time Queen Isabel Trip to Planet Mars Shouts Whole Spain In Aerosuemarine With White Intruder About Magellan Trip My first impression of Queen When News Received Isabella as 1 knelt and kissed her hand Mr. Vasco da Gama, the world's New York, N. Y. October 15, 1452 The real facts concerning the voy- was that she was very tiny but very most famous discoverer of an all-water Madrid, Spain, Oct. 13, 1492— Special to Madrid Journal age of Magellan around the world have regal. Her flowing ermine-trimmed route to India, is now contemplating (AP)— Tons of ticker tape, whole With a great deal of trepidation and been revealed by a former secretary of robe cascaded in lovely folds around the salt sea voyage to the unknow jl§|(£~^Ut"" directories, and thou- uneasiness I entered the elevator this King Ferdinand in the following let- the feet of her ladies in waiting. Her planet called Mars. wriasTyr newspapers were hurled today morning to be carried to the penthouse ters. beautiful chestnut hair was curled in Many noted professors will accom- from every window upon the madly of Chief Ritzyolecuss, of the Bally- Letter to Magellan I from King a profusion of tiny ringlets to the pany Mr. da Gama on his voyage. chereing, stamping, milling crowd bel hoo tribe of Indians, inhabitants of the Ferdinand. crown of her well-shaped head. Bright Mr. Raus Hanson will act as weather low which thronged the streets of newly discovered land. I had heard blue eyes deepened by brown eye- Most esteemed sire: prophet; Mr. G. W. Chappelear will Madrid from three o'clock yesterday him discussed on the street corner, in shadow sparkled with a joy of living. Your son, the youthful Magellan II, study the people and determine their until dawn today. The greatness of the night-clubs, in the business offices, Her deeply scarlet lips had evidently has, in an audience with me, requested ancestry; Mrs. Annie B. Cook will Spain has been augumented threefold and, in fact, everywhere. I was ex- not been made up with the "keep kiss- permission to sail around the world. arrange all dates between the crew and and her dearest dream realized—Amer- pecting to see a pompous, dignified, able" idea strongly to the fore. A slim To us greyheads such requests seem the Martian girls. Dr. John A. Saw- ica has been discovered. coldly reserved old genteman, who white hand held a Kamel cigarette foolish, but one keeps a tender spot in hill, as he knows the language of the A tiny Spanish blond glanced up would address me with very curt re- upon which the ash was nearly an inch his heart for youthful adventures when people of Mars, will act as interpreter. with an air faintly tinged with dis- marks, and make me feel extremely long. one remembers one's own escapades. Miss Clara Turner will plan all the gust to her leading man of many a uncomfortable. On the contrary, I "Come, come, my man, don't be Yet I have not granted him permis- meals, of which the H. T. C. salads production: "Now maybe you'll go was ushered into the presence of a bowing over my hand and winking at sion to set sail due to certain laws will be the main dish. and learn some new technique. They small, insignificant-looking man, smok- my maid at the same time. Look me The company will leave in a newly- say Frederic March is one swell lover." ing a cigarette and reading The Silver which require parent's consent to such in the eye and don't stutter. What ventures. If you will write me im- built vessel called the aerosubmarine. "Hooray," shouted a dirty little Screen. ... I later found the magazine do you want?" mediately a letter complying with these This vessel can leave the water and street urchin, "now we can learn to very interesting myself. "Oh, most gracious Queen, will you fly through the air. It can also run bat like Babe Ruth. I'm going to be rules the said permission will be grant- tell me why you decided to send man "Come right in," he said jovially, ed. We desire to file such facts against underneath the water, which is an 'Home-Run King" some day, I bet- "I've been expecting you all morning," Columbus to discover America when added advantage to the explorers. cha." His chum frowned darkly. the future when circumstances may everyone else thought it so absurd?" and he led me to a large comfortable demand such evidence. We seldom The voyage is going to be made 'What I betcha," he exclaimed, "is chair, by the side of which were a The Queen with a slight shrug said under the auspices of the Student Gov- (Continued on Page Two) like to accept telegrams, cables, or impatiently, "Well, if you must know, bottle and two glasses. phone calls. ernment of Spain. Just as he was pouring me a drink, i it was because he had such delightfully The purpose of the breath-taking His majesty, long curly eyelashes and I never could COLUMBUS ADDRESSES in came one of the most beautiful adventure is to determine whether TRANSATLANTIC CREW- women I have «ver seen, with coal Ferdinand of Spain. resist curly eyelashes." whoopee socks are being worn in the black hair and eyes. "What do you think is the most better women's colleges of Mars. AFTER OCEAN VOYAGE "I want" you to meet my squaw," Second letter to Magellan I. important thing that Spain will receive Mr. da Gama will stop in all the Trailing along behind the milkman, said the chief, and they sat down to- Sire: as a result of this discovery?" large cities of the United States. As thirteen weary men plod in the early gether on the divan and told me some Your statement that you are in fear She frowned a moment thoughtful- Harrisonburg is the leading city, he dawn. Who are these men? Columbus of the wonders of this new land. of your son's falling off the world ly, then a smile broke over her face. will stop there and lecture during the —and his the remaining twelve of his "How do you feel about our com- seems unfounded since Columbus, "I can't decide, whether it will be Cab Christmas holidays. The students are crew! ing into your land?" was the first though he did swindle my wife's jewels, Callaway's orchestra or the Notre expected to attend all meetings and no "Well, men," spoke Columbus, question I asked the chief. the scoundrel! did not fall off. Dame-Navy Game. Both will un- one will be allowed to leave campus. "Since we've crossed that little stream "Well," he answered, sinking back A telegram would be appreciated at doubtedly assist in raising Spanish civil- After the lectures are concluded, of water, what say to a breakfast in into the cushions lazily, "we've always the earliest date since your son is im- ization to a new high point of de- Mr. da Gama with his study crew will Child's?" gotten along by ourselves over here. patient to be off around the world. velopment. With these two things, leave for Mars. "Aye, Captain," was the one reply. We don't mind your coming in, how- His majesty, the Greeks and Romans will have to Eagerly now these thirteen filed to ever, if you don't try to make many Ferdinand of Spain. step if they don't want us to surpass ISLAND INDIAN GREET the rear of the restaurant and there, changes. We like our life just as it Third letter to Magellan I. them." C. COLUMBUS AND MEN midst Lombardo's strains of music, is." He led me out to look down on Sire: "What is your frank opinion of the leisurely ordered up thirteen full-man- the great crowd in the street below. (Continued on Page Two) Eskimo Spitz?" WITH FESTIVE BANQUET size breakfasts. They looked like little ants crawling o The Queen made a facfl. "An San Salvador, October 20, 1492: While the men were busily exchang- around, we were so far above them. atrocious blot on America's fair face. ROYAL FAMILY PLAYS The Indians living on the islands ing smokes and bits of Spanish gos- "What do you think of it?" he asked, He is neither fish, flesh, or fowl." where Columbus landed were so glad sip—since it's an old Spanish custom looking at the great skyscrapers, the CHIEF PERSIAN SPORT "Do you approve of drinking?" to have visitors that they arranged a —one of Columbus' crew slipped noise and hurly-burly of the street "Emphatically not, but it's very IN PALACE COURTYARD huge banquet in their honor. The craftily around behind Columbus' cars and taxis, and the throbbing, puls- pleasant to do nevertheless." Civic Club of the town was in charge chair. "Say, boss, there's a reporter at ' ing crowd below. I was stunned for "Had you ever known Columbus be- Official Bulletin from the Palace, of the affair, making elaborate prepara- the next table who keeps eyeing us. a moment by the magnitude of it all. fore he sought aid from you?" Madrid:—Baseball, the new sport re- tions as to decorations for the banquet How about some big talk—might help In Spain we had no such scenes as With a little laugh and a playful cently introduced from Persia, has been hall, tempting food, and lively enter- with Izzy of Spain." this.