Hermann Nitsch Under My Skin
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HERMANN NITSCH UNDER MY SKIN Personal Structures Art Projects # 02 HERMANN NITSCH HERMANN NITSCH UNDER MY SKIN This book is the documentation of Personal Structures Art Projects # 02. It has been published as a limited edition. The edition comprises 250 copies of which UNDER MY SKIN 50 DeLuxe, numbered from 1 to 50, and 50 DeLuxe hors commerce, numbered from I to L. The 150 Standard copies are numbered from 51 to 200. Each item of this limited edition consists of a book and a DVD of the 130th Aktion by He rmann Nitsch in a case, housed together in a cassette. The DeLuxe edition is signed by the artist and additionally contains a piece of bloodstained cloth originating from the 130th Aktion of the Orgien Mysterien Theater. This limited edition has been divided as follows: # 1-50: DeLuxe edition: Luïscius Antiquarian Booksellers, Netherlands # 51-200: Standard edition: Luïscius Antiquarian Booksellers, Netherlands HC I-L: Not for trade © 2010. Text by Hermann Nitsch, Karlyn De Jongh & Sarah Gold Photos by GlobalArtAffairs Foundation All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechan- ical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without permission of the editor. Concept by Rene Rietmeyer Design by Hermann Nitsch, Karlyn De Jongh & Sarah Gold Printed and bound under the direction of Andreas Krüger, Germany Production in coöperation with Christien Bakx, www.luiscius.com Published by GlobalArtAffairs Foundation, www.globalartaffairs.org KARLYN DE JONGH SARAH GOLD DAY 1 17 MAY 2010 KARLYN DE JONGH I woke up before my alarm went off. Through the small window above my bed I could see it was sunny outside. I was in a large room in Naples, in Italy. I had a good night sleep and I was ready for the day. For me and Sarah it was the first day of the Personal Structures Art Project #02. Our first book in this series, with Law- rence Weiner, had just been finished and now we were going to create the next one, with Hermann Nitsch. This new project with Nitsch was about experiencing with the senses and experienc- ing Nitsch. It was not about giving an art-historical description, to judge, to criticize and draw conclusions. It was about being open, to experience, to live. It was Monday morning and the first day in the series of events that would lead to the 130th Aktion this coming Sunday, where Sarah and I would be taking part as passive actors. It was exciting. I was looking forward to this week with new experiences, new people to meet, a new test for myself and our new Art Project. Since a few days there had been this strange discrepancy be- tween my body and my thinking—for as far as one can separate them. I had decided to open myself further up and to experience everything with my senses as intensely as I possibly could, to be as conscious as possible about feeling, hearing, seeing, smelling and tasting and also, especially for this week, to have no moral restrictions, because that is what Nitsch is all about. Basically, this discrepancy existed since we had left Venice, since Sarah, the 7 DAY 1 17 MAY 2010 KarlYN DE Jongh DAY 1 17 MAY 2010 KarlYN DE Jongh Dutch artist and I had left our home, on this journey that would would handle the situation, the smell of the dead animals, the lead to the Aktion, to the final moments with Nitsch. blood, the intestines and the shit. I could not imagine what it would be like, how strong the smell would be, and how it would Especially the sense of touch had a great influence on my Being. affect me. I expected having to vomit, not being able to physi- Since I had opened myself up more, I was extremely sensitive cally handle the situation, that I was overpowered, that I had to and more emotional than I would normally be. When we were let myself go completely. It gave me a sense of fear, but this fear driving in the car in the direction of Naples, and especially dur- aroused me in such a great extent, that I just wanted to have it. ing our visit to Montepulciano, I felt everything on my body: I I think that this in particular caused the incredible sexual desire felt my pants stroking my thighs, the air on my skin, my nipples that I had towards it. touching the soft surface of my bra, the satin of my thong slight- ly touching my pussy, just everything. I was very aroused by it, I was not sure what my body would look like on the cross. Nitsch constantly, without any break. It was there all the time, but not had not seen us naked yet and we first needed to be approved. in a very direct way. It was more indirect, it was as if I had lost In the months before, I had taken the effort to pay extra atten- control over my body. Everything had an erotic feel to it, what- tion to my weight, I wanted to be fit. Some people would be ever it was. Already the week prior to this day, I had been mas- filming us, and this morning in Naples, I did exercises on my turbating extensively, fantasizing about hanging on the cross, mattress. It was nice, the sun was shining on my body, the air about somebody having power over me, about feeling the air stroking my legs while I was moving them, and the draft along on my naked body and being touched by people I had never my wet pussy gave me an extra impulse. Especially this draft al- seen in my life. I fantasized about it every night. It had me cap- ways makes me feel like I am exposed, as if I am completely open tivated. Even while having dinner, I felt the excitement, it was as and as if everybody could see inside of me. Voyeurism was one being in a constant state of foreplay, like the preparation for an of the reasons for my excitement about hanging on the cross. extremely intense orgasm. I wanted to have sex the entire time. It was not only the beautiful idea of becoming part of an art- work; it was very much a sexual experience for me as well. The I also felt like that this morning, but I had to be focused on combination of fear, of being overpowered, the fear of blood, of the conversation that might take place, the conversation with having it in my mouth, it disgusted me at so many points. But Nitsch. I wanted to have my control back; I knew I did not have this fear was sexual. Actually, I desired it very much. Because of it. I was in a state of complete openness towards experiencing my exercises, I got aroused again, but Sarah and the Dutch artist everything. And then there was the excitement about the new already came downstairs and I did not want to masturbate at Art Project, the new event with Nitsch that Sarah and I wanted that point. I wanted to start the day. I was ready for it. to do very, very much. I wanted to experience it. Hanging on the cross, was for me the realization of a fantasy I had had for Although I had a one-person mattress, Sarah and the Dutch art- many years. Not knowing what would happen exactly, how I ist joined me in bed. We cuddled for a while, it felt nice, warm 8 9 DAY 1 17 MAY 2010 KarlYN DE Jongh DAY 1 17 MAY 2010 KarlYN DE Jongh and we all had a positive attitude towards what was about to that I was taking towards him, were like the last steps before happen. It was pleasant to share that moment with them. We this event would really start. I thought: get yourself ready, this were a team and we were on our way to new adventures. It was is the start of seven days with Nitsch, seven days in which you like a new beginning and I looked forward to experiencing it have to be completely consciously aware, completely honest together with Sarah. It felt so warm and beautiful in bed that we and completely open and without any moral restrictions. What completely forgot about the time. When I looked at my phone, a chance! I hoped that he would actually have time for us and it was already 9.15 am. But we had promised to be at the Museo that we would actually be able to speak with him. While I was Hermann Nitsch at 10 am. I rushed to the shower, washed my walking towards him, he felt like a giant mountain that I would hair, brushed my teeth, put on my clothes, packed the things have to climb, a real challenge. I needed and off we went to the museum. Dizzy from the long Sarah and I had met Nitsch already a few weeks ago at his winding stairs, I opened the front door of the building. The sun house in Austria. I was in love with his smile. He has this cute was shining in my face and I looked over to the Vesuvius. Sarah little tongue that comes slightly up halfway between his lips, took my hand and together with the Dutch artist, we walked to when he is laughing. He seemed honest and open.