6 • The Coconut Telegraph • April 2008 referred to as Conchs, the The mock secession and the “nation” took the name of the events surrounding it gener- The Conch Republic: Conch Republic. ated great publicity for the As part of the protest, the Keys’ plight — the roadblock Proclamation of Secession new Conch Republic immediately and inspection station were declared war against the removed soon afterward. ...Continued from page 1 busybodies who try to tell us (symbolically In the 26 years since, the To proclaim this, an how to live, buy and sell breaking a loaf of stale Cuban anniversary has been marked explanation is in order. To wit: properties, and generally bread over the head of a man with good times and unique The original Conchs came from confuse the issues of our local dressed in a naval uniform), adventures that showcase the the Bahamas to the government. then quickly surrendered after wacky, zany and otherwise Keys because they were We, as residents of the one minute (to the man in the unpredictable fun for which the sickened with tyranny, Conch Republic, refuse to uniform), and applied for one Keys is known. arrogance, abuse of rights and suffer any longer from fools billion dollars in foreign aid. lack of compassion for and bureaucrats in Tallahassee humanity by a despot English and Washington! We’re not King. They were known as going to beg or beseech them “Conchs” because they raised any longer for help. We want flags with the tough, hard one simple thing — Equality. conch shellfish, protesting Here is our flag we so they’d rather eat conch than proudly fly. It has a conch pay the King’s taxes and live shell, sunburst and stars of the under his abuse. Now, 400 Southern Cross and Big Dipper. years later, we find similar We secede from the United dictatorship from the State States. and Federal levels. We have raised our flag, We serve notice on the given our notice and named our government in Washington to new government. remove the roadblock in Florida We call upon the world to City, across the highway from recognize us as the Conch “Skeeter’s” Last Chance Saloon. Republic. It discourages , upon We call upon our residents, which we rely, and it obstructs the Conchs, to join us and the everyday flow of business stand together, lest we fall from the mainland to the apart – Fall from fear, from a fabulous . We also lack of courage, intimidation by ask Washington to put up a an uncaring government whose permanent border to a new actions show it has grown too foreign land. big to care for people on a We also serve notice to the small chain of islands. bureaucrats in Tallahassee to Know ye, that we hereby pull out your State Troopers, present this proclamation to DEA agents and all other the world. History of Conch Republic

In 1982, the United States When the complaints went Border Patrol set up a unanswered by the federal roadblock and inspection point government and attempts to on US, in front of the Last get an injunction against the Chance Saloon, just south of roadblock failed in court, as a Florida City. Vehicles were form of protest they declared stopped and searched for the Keys’ “independence” on narcotics and illegal immigrants. April 23, 1982. Since the The City Council federal government had set up complained repeatedly about the equivalent of a border the inconvenience for travelers station as if the Keys were a to and from Key West, claiming foreign nation, they might as that it hurt the Keys’ important well become one. As many of tourism industry. the local citizens were The Coconut Telegraph • April 2008 • 7 Tearing Down To Rebuild Rethinking Complaining

We all know someone who people we love. Another issue has elevated the process of with complaining is that we complaining to a high art. Some- sometimes tend to focus on times funny, sometimes ex- other people, whom we can't hausting, these people have the change, as a way of deflecting ability to find a problem just attention from the one person about anywhere. In its more we can change—ourselves. So evolved form, complaining is transforming complaining into simply the ability to see what's something useful is a twofold not working, in one's own life or process that begins with in the external world, and it can turning our critical eye to look be quite useful if followed to at things we can actually do its natural conclusion—finding a something about, and then solution and applying it. How- taking positive action. ever, many of us don't get that When we find ourselves far, and we find that complain- complaining, the last thing we ing has become an end in itself. need to do is get down on In small doses, this is not a big ourselves. Instead, we can problem, but if complaining has begin by noticing that we are become a huge part of our in the mode of wanting to make identities, it may be time to some changes. But rather than take a good look at how we are lashing out at somebody or an spending our energy. organization, we can look for an Complaining is a person's appropriate place to channel way of acknowledging that they this energy—not our neighbor's are not happy with the way house, but possibly parts of our things are. In a metaphorical own. Finally, we can ask way, when we complain or ourselves the positive question of what we would like to create in criticize, we are tearing down the place of whatever it is we an undesirable structure in want to tear down. When we do order to make room for some- this, we channel a negative habit thing new. But if all we do is into a creative process, thus using tear down, never bothering to our energy to change the world summon the creative energy around us in a positive way. required to create something new, we are not fulfilling the *Reprinted from DailyOM - Inspir- ational thoughts for a happy, process. In fact, we are at risk healthy and fulfilling day. Register for becoming a stagnant and for free at www.dailyom.com. destructive force in our own lives and in the lives of the