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Our Yellow House Fanfic by CaraNo Disclaimer: I don’t own Twilight. Chapter 43, 44, 45, and the epilogue are beta'd by HollettLA Chapter 1 …I'm here without you, baby… …I think about you, baby And I dream about you all the time… …I'm here without you, baby But you're still with me in my dreams And tonight, girl, it's only you and me… ~Here Without You by 3 Doors Down – chapter song. July 1st Edward Cullen. I never thought Charlie Swan would end up being my best friend, but I stand corrected. Not only is he my best friend, he is also the one I can be myself with. The one who understands, the one who never pressures. Because he's the same. The two of us are the same. Broken. Muted. Dead inside. I even wear flannel nowadays. You would laugh, and I would smile because I love the sound of your laughter. Everyday is the same. I wake up, take a shower, sometimes I shave, sometimes I don't. I get dressed – jeans, a wife beater, and a flannel shirt that I leave unbuttoned. Can't part with my well worn black All Stars, either. I skip breakfast. If you can call it breakfast. I wake up around two PM, so perhaps I should call it… what do you call a meal around that hour? It can't be lunch, right? Too early for dinner. Late lunch. Yeah. I skip that, anyway. I sit on the porch for a couple of hours. Sipping coffee, smoking cigarettes. Sometimes Charlie comes over. Sometimes I tinker with my guitar, sometimes I don't. But often I do. I always think of you when I play. Then around five in the afternoon, I head to work. I stop by RJ's on the way, because by that time I'm starving, and Rose and her brother James, they make the best burgers. Except for the pickles. I can't stand pickles but I can't bring myself to order a burger without them. Instead I throw them in the garbage. You always smiled when I gave you the pickles. RJ's is right next to my bar. The bar I took over when mom wanted to slow down. She loved that bar. Still does, and she isn't too old to work, but she craved better hours. Esme is not a night person anymore. I am, though. We run Twilight together, I suppose. I take care of the bar and she runs the office, takes care of the paperwork and all that shit. That's very fine by me. I love that bar. It was always my plan to work there and there's not a thing about it I don't like. It's small but big enough. I'd say we're a small family working there. Mom is there during the day, and then at night, it's me and Alec tending the bar, and my cousin Tanya working as the waitress. You loved the bar, too. Remember, angel? I'm back home around three AM, and that's when I know for certain that Charlie joins me. Sometimes we're on my porch, sometimes we're on his porch. Our houses are the same but don't look the same, standing next to each other. Two stories. Small front yards. But our house is yellow. It's a bit faded now. I need to repaint it. The shutters are white. You painted the door dark red, and I grinned because you got paint on your nose. I need to repaint the door, too. Need to find the exact same red, though. It must be that color. Must be. Would be wrong otherwise. She said it was the perfect color for our door. The door that opened up to our home. She said the same when we painted the house yellow. It was the perfect color because it was happy, and our yellow house would stand out amongst the white ones on our street. Charlie's door is white. He also needs to repaint. Perhaps we should repaint some day. On the other side of the road, right across from my house, Jasper and Alice live. Alice isn't a night person but Jasper is, and sometimes he joins me and Charlie on the porch for some jamming. And of course a few beers. He doesn't play the guitar, though. No, he plays the harmonica. Then we just sit there for a few hours. We don't talk much. Only a little. We speak when necessary. That isn't often. Instead we enjoy the quiet, or the music, and the night. We all love the nights. Doesn't matter if it's summer or winter, we still sit there. Doesn't get that cold here in New Orleans, anyway, in the winter. It's summer now, though. July. It's the 4th tomorrow. The smile you gave me when we watched the fireworks together… When the sky goes from black to red, we part ways and go to bed. I go to bed alone. Missing her. My Bella. My wife. Is our son alive? In bed I lie awake for an hour or so. I think about when the days were ours. We were so happy. Everything was perfect. The pregnancy was a surprise, a big surprise, but we were happy. So damn happy, and when she started to show, I was there all the time. I couldn't look away to save my life. I watched her and her belly, and we smiled whenever our eyes locked because while I watched her, she watched me. Always with that adoration. I miss you, baby. We had everything we wanted. I had the bar. Even then. And we had our house. The yellow house that stands out, I live there alone now. The house where we were going to raise our family. Together. Remember? We always said we wanted two children. Bella's dream was to either work in the bar with me, or work with children. Sometimes she said she wanted to do both, and I used to laugh and tap her on the nose and say, "When are you going to sleep? Take care of kids during the day and then the grownups at the bar at night?" She gave me a scowl then, which morphed into a pout because she could never hold the scowl. In the end I thawed her up by kissing that spot. That special spot on her hipbone that made her sigh softly. That was my favorite. That soft sigh in content, and I'd rest my head on her stomach as she threaded her fingers through my hair. In our bed we could lie like that for hours, especially on weekends, and it always made me think very randomly, mostly about the two of us. She'd giggle, which made my head shake on her stomach, but it was because I sometimes voiced my thoughts without knowing it, and that always amused her. I remember the day everything changed for me and Bella. It was the 4th of July and I had recently turned fourteen. She was still thirteen for a couple more months, and I had the biggest crush on her. It was puberty, there's no denying that. My best friend all of the sudden had boobs for crying out loud. She was so pretty. "Bella, where did you get that?" I hissed, pointing at the two bottles of beer in her hands. I had a pretty good guess because I knew damn well the kind of beer Charlie loved. "Schh," she giggled, taking my hand to lead the way to her backyard. "Don't worry, Edward, Dad won't notice." God, I hope not because it'll be my ass… Charlie always liked me, I knew that, but if he caught us with his damn beer… well, I wasn't so sure he'd like me anymore. As usual, we headed to her tree house, but it was different now. All I could see were her pouty lips, her boobs, and… I wanted to sniff her hair. Why did I want to sniff her hair? I already knew it smelled like cherries. I loved it. Just like I love Cherry Coke. "Here," she said, handing me a beer as we sat down on the floor. There was no furniture in the tree house. Just a few pillows on the floor and a few blankets. "Have you ever had beer before, Bella?" I asked, eyeing the bottle skeptically before taking it from her. "No, but there's a first for everything, right?" she replied, grinning adorably as she popped the cap of her own beer. "Um, have you, though? Had beer before, I mean." "Once," I chuckled. "Alec gave me a sip a few weeks ago. It wasn't all that great." "Alec's the new bartender, right?" she asked. "Tanya told me in school." I smirked, not surprised, because my cousin had the biggest crush on Alec. She was fifteen and Alec was twenty-one! Tanya is crazy, I swear. "Yes, he is. You should come down soon to visit. Mom misses you," I told her truthfully. Mom truly missed Bella if she didn't see her at least once a week, and in a way she always saw Bella as a daughter. Pretty much like I know Charlie saw me as a son of some sort. Mom and Charlie had much in common, both being single parents with one child.
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